


The Beta: The Unfinished Story of Leah Clearwater

by Dramaticfield



Category: Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Drama & Romance, F/M, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-14
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:47:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 257,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25900822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dramaticfield/pseuds/Dramaticfield
Summary: Twilight Fan Fiction - I do not own these characters and all credit goes to Stephenie Meyer.The only known female wolf has lost everything; the love of her life, her father, and her freedom and she still can't seem to catch a break. Ultimately, the worst part is that she lost herself in the midst of it all. Beginning at the end of Breaking Dawn, I thought it was time for Leah Clearwater to get her own ending. - Third Person Omniscient
Relationships: Leah/Jacob, Leah/OC, Leah/Pack
Comments: 7
Kudos: 35





	1. New Years Eve

Chapter One

There was finally a date. 

Almost exactly two weeks from today, December 31st, 2006 the eagerly anticipated Uley-Young wedding was finally happening.

With the newfound peace of the volturi not destined to kill them at any moment, Sam and Emily had decided only hours ago that it was time to end their engagement and finally throw their greatly anticipated wedding. Luckily, in a small town it really didn’t take much planning to throw everything together, even though Emily had been picking away at the little things since they got engaged.

Leah remembered the day vividly. 

**

Her mother called her downstairs one morning after Seth had left for school. It was just the two of them, but she had cooked Leah’s favorite homemade chocolate chip pancakes. Leah could smell them as soon as she walked out of her room and made her way down to the kitchen. Her mom had two plates put out on the island in the middle of the room along with fresh coffee, and lots of syrup. 

“What’s this for?” Leah asked skeptically.

Leah’s relationship with her mother had grown immensely since her dad passed away. Things had been rocky with her and both her parents for a while after the break-up, but Harry told Sue she would be fine – it was just been her lashing out. Leah was always so mad that her dad seemed unphased by Sam leaving her – surely, he would make good on his threats to Sam when they started dating about what happened if he hurt his daughter. But nope; Harry seemed to understand, which irritated Leah to no end. 

Sue tried to believe Harry that their daughter would come around… at least until Leah phased in their living room, destroyed their couch, and Harry had his fatal heart attack. Leah was forever indebted with guilt, and after her mom was able to finally explain everything to Leah – including Sam and Emily’s imprint, Sue and her daughter began to rebuild their relationship and Leah finally understood why her dad didn’t kill Sam for breaking her heart – he knew it wasn’t his fault. Well, not consciously anyways. Only now, it was too late to make amends with her father.

“I thought we could use a girl’s morning – Seth ate before he left for school.”

Leah nodded apprehensively and sat down with her mom. She felt a strange feeling of anticipation hanging between them, but they made enough small-talk to cover the time it took to eat their pancakes and Sue started to clean up.

“I have something to tell you, Leah,” Sue turned to her daughter who was sat at the island, nursing her coffee. Leah nodded, and her mom frowned, leaning against the countertop. The look on her face alerted Leah back to the heavy feeling in the air and she wondered what blow her mom could possibly throw at her now that would even matter. In the grand scheme of things, losing Sam and her dad had been enough for her to deal with, accompanied by turning into a large dog in the pack that her ex-boyfriend ran. What could make this any worse? “Emily’s mom called last night.”

“Oh yeah? About time she decided to check in considering her daughter ran off with my boyfriend.” Leah found it hard not to be bitter, despite doing her best to forgive them both after finding out about the imprint. It still wasn’t fair.

Sue took a deep breath in. She was rarely nervous, but she knew how much Leah had been through in the past few months. “Sam proposed to Emily last night, Leah.”

The words felt like a shot in the chest and she dropped her mug just as she was about to place it to her lips, the pieces shattering on the island, coffee going everywhere. Why did it seem like every time things couldn’t get worse, fate decided to hit her with another impossible situation? Sue jumped, grabbing the dish towel on the counter to wipe up the mess. 

“What did she say?” Leah’s earlier attempt at a pleasant disposition now failed entirely; her voice was cold, and Sue almost cringed as she wiped up the liquid and tried to gather the broken mug. Sue hesitated, which only made Leah angrier, tears formulating in her eyes. “Mom! What did she say?”

“Yes,” Sue uttered softly, eyes closed. “She said yes.”

It made since – they were imprinted, but a part of Leah still wished Emily would tell Sam to go fuck himself and be the best friend she grew up with – be there for her. Choose her.

Leah felt the shiver go down her spine, and she got off the bar stool at the island, stepping back immediately.

“Leah – breathe,” Sue said quickly. “Just breathe. Let’s talk.”

But it was too late. Leah turned on her heel and ran out the back door, into the back yard as the dark red blur flashed through her eyes. She managed to disappear into the trees before her wolf exploded and started running. It was the first time she tried to escape La Push, but she was trapped. As far as she tried to go, she felt the pull of La Push, dragging her back – her Alpha calling her home to her personal prison. 

**

Nine months later, Leah was still on the fence about why she had agreed to be a bridesmaid at this thing. She had reluctantly agreed to Emily’s request to try and mend their broken relationship, but she had come to terms with the fact that they would never mend to the point of being unaltered. As the day grew closer, however, she was wondering if it was too late to back out. Saying yes to make Emily happy seemed like the right thing to do at the time but putting herself through this now seemed like a cruel punishment; one she bestowed upon herself. 

The two packs had returned to La Push after the volturi confrontation only six hours ago, but there had been no decision made as to what was going to happen from here. They could all hear each other again, just as they had been permanently rejoined, but Leah was hopeful Jacob may decide to stay separate despite her happiness at reuniting with her mom again. It was easier to forget Sam Uley had ever existed when she was in Forks. La Push had too many memories that she couldn’t escape.

Tonight, however, they had more pressing matters. It was New Years Eve and Seth had convinced Sue to let him throw a party at their house to celebrate them being home and out of harm’s way – for now, anyways. The earlier volturi confrontation was long forgotten by her younger brother, even though they had potentially been seconds away from death this morning.

Leah couldn’t care any less about the festivities, but Seth’s palpable excitement was hard to ignore. Sometimes, she wished for her brother’s innocence back. It had been a long time since she had been as carefree as him.

“Leah!” Sue called from downstairs.

Getting up off her bed from watching some crappy movie on cable, Leah padded downstairs at her mother’s call. She really did need her own place, but that was hard to do with no education or job considering she was at the pack’s beckoning call 24/7. If not for the whole wolf thing, she would have vacated La Push long ago to pursue her education and get a fresh start. The community college seemed like a more enticing option everyday she approached her mid-twenties, but she really wished she could attend a college outside of La Push for the serenity and privacy it would bring, plus the community college was scarce with course offerings. She had no idea what she even wanted to do, but anything outside La Push seemed favourable in comparison.

“Yeah mom?” Leah went into the kitchen where she heard some pots clattering together. Charlie was washing dishes – because if he wasn’t at the Cullen’s with Bella and Renesmee, he seemed to have claimed their house as his own; and her mom was boiling something on the stove. They had only gotten home an hour ago from the fishing trip that Edward and Bella had insisted Charlie take so he was out of town during the volturi’s visit. Once Seth called Sue to let her know everything was fine, she convinced Charlie to end the trip early so they could come back to see their children. Sue didn’t worry often, and she tried not to show it on their trip, but she had been terrified she would come home to an empty house.

“Are you going to be around tonight?”

“I guess so. Where else would I go?”

“Try to have fun tonight, Lee,” Sue looked over her shoulder at her daughter who stood in the door frame of the kitchen. “Maybe this year can give you some new opportunities.”

“One can only hope,” she said dryly. “Are you and Charlie going to be hanging around?”

“We will be here for a little while – Renesmee is going to come over for a little bit with Jacob, but we’re going to drop her home around ten, then we’ll get out of your hair for the rest of the evening. It’s been a hectic day and you all deserve to have some fun.”

“You’re staying at Charlie’s?” Leah asked. Surely, Charlie’s late-night visits when her and Seth had ran off to join Jacob’s pack hadn’t been missed by anyone in La Push, however it was different now being faced with the seriousness of her mother’s new relationship head-on.

Sue’s cheeks flushed slightly, but she was too busy trying to cook dinner for Leah to notice the crimson colouring. “I wanted to give you guys some privacy.”

Leah knew better than to comment, but she raised a brow. Leah looked between the two, inquisitive. “When did this officially happen?” 

“Charlie kept me company when you and Seth were gone - we got very close. We can talk about this later, Leah.”

She didn’t really want to consider her mom with someone other than her dad just yet. She was glad for Charlie’s company for her mother when she and Seth were gone, but he wasn’t her dad and she really didn’t want a leech for a sister. “I’d rather not,” the younger female stated. 

Sue nodded understandingly, “How are you doing from earlier?”

”Fine, we all just stood around in a field and then went home.”

Sue knew her daughter wouldn’t admit if she had been scared, but she smiled proudly at her strength. “Well, have fun tonight. Try and relax and enjoy yourself, Leah.” 

Leah nodded. She was probably just going to hold up in her bedroom for the night. After all, she had enough fraternizing with everyone trying to prepare for the possible volturi battle to do her for the next century. 

The shewolf turned on her heel and went back upstairs. As a teenager, a party without adult supervision had been the dream – not that her dad let that happen. Harry hadn’t been too strict, but when Leah got a boyfriend, he had become more protective of his little girl. That hadn’t stopped her from finding loopholes, though; she just had to be more creative.

Finishing the movie on TV, Leah heard the door open and got up off her bed to look outside her window. Rachel, Paul, Jacob, Renesmee, Jared, and Kim were there. Did she really have to make an appearance? She ran her brush through her short, straight hair and decided to throw on a pair of black, form-fitting jeans and a tank top that she found at the back of her closet. It was full of silver sequins and she felt it suitable for New Years Eve. It showed enough cleavage to be appropriate, but also made her feel somewhat feminine – something she struggled with since erupting into a massive dog. She barely wore anything in her closet anymore; her attire mainly focused on dresses that were easy to get on and off for phasing. Regardless, it hugged her tiny, curvy frame nicely and she decided to go down to show her face before Sam and Emily got there just to say she did to appease her mother.

“Leah!” Rachel said happily, seeming to already have a couple drinks in her as she bounded over to engulf her into a hug. She and Rachel had been very close growing up. Harry and Billy had been good fishing friends, so Sue and Jacob’s mom, Sarah, had many play dates with her, Rachel, Rebecca, Seth, and Jacob while the men were gone. Leah remembered Sarah’s death well as did Rachel and Rebecca. Jacob and Seth got the easier end of the spectrum by having been young enough to not have a very vivid recollection. The two girls hadn’t been as close since Rachel left for college, but Leah still felt comfortable with Rachel; almost sisterly. She couldn’t blame her for running as fast as she could from La Push years ago but now, she envied her ability to have the opportunity to do so.

She hugged Rachel back tightly, however, and smiled. “Hey, Rach.”

”Are you okay?” Rachel asked, looking her over. “I was so scared, Lee.”

”I’m fine,” she promised. “Nothing to worry about.”

”You mean a whole lot to worry about. My best friend, brother, and boyfriend were out in that field today waiting to see if they were going to make it out. I’ve never been so worried in my entire life. Paul and Jacob said goodbye to me before they left - I wasn’t sure if I would see them again. I think I sobbed until they got home – and then for an hour after because I was so relieved.”

Leah honestly hadn’t realized how difficult it would be for the imprints - it wasn’t really the first thing that was on her mind today through all the commotion, but now she realized how terrible it really had been for them. She reached over to hug her friend again. “I’m sorry, but we’re all okay, really.”

Rachel pulled back and smiled as she reached down, into her purse to pull out a half-drank flask of tequila. “You’re doing a shot with me. I’ve got more where this came from. We have to celebrate; and I need to calm my nerves.”

Leah smirked, “I think I’m okay with just hanging out.”

“Not happening, you’re having fun tonight. With me.” 

Kim and Rachel spent a lot of time together now since they had both been imprinted on, but Leah knew Rachel would rather hang out with her. Unfortunately, they didn’t get to often because Rachel worked from home in the daytime and usually hung out with Paul in the evenings and Leah had been away with the Cullen’s, but now that she was home, maybe having a drinking buddy and catching up with an old friend was exactly what she needed.

“Fine, but be careful, remember the last time we drank together?” Leah had stayed up with her all night in her bathroom to make sure she was okay. Granted, they had only been seventeen at the time.

“I’ve got a stronger tolerance now. College didn’t just give me a diploma,” she teased. 

Leah rolled her eyes and smirked. “Well, you’re definitely going to need more than that to touch me now.” Her heightened temperature being a wolf burned everything off so quickly, so she would have to drink quite a bit to maintain any kind of buzz at all, but by the amount of beer that was on her kitchen table that the guys were trying to fit into the fridge, she was willing to bet there would be quite a few drunk wolves tonight if they kept up their pace. Maybe it was reckless considering the earlier events, but they deserved a celebration. The Cullen’s were on alert if anything were to happen, but Alice was certain that they wouldn’t be bothered anymore by the volturi - and most of the other leeches had left to retreat home except for Nahuel and his aunt. They were safe to let loose for now.

Rachel giggled, already feeling the shots her and Kim took earlier. “I still can’t believe my brother imprinted,” she said as her eyes wandered over to her little brother on the couch, Renesmee on his lap. She looked about ten now, and although Nahuel stated he grew until age seven, Carlisle was convinced she was going to grow much faster. She was already over halfway to seventeen and she was only a couple months old.

“Especially on the half-breed,” Leah said. “It’s bad enough Quil imprinted on a child, but a half-leech?”

Rachel shrugged, “I guess they have a little more to figure out down the road. Can I tell you something?” Rachel’s attention turned back to her friend.

“What’s up?”

Rachel lowered her voice and leaned in. “I think Paul is going to propose soon.”

“What?” Leah’s brow furrowed in surprise. She had no information to either confirm or deny her suspicions because she hadn’t been in Paul’s mind since she left La Push. “Did he say something?” It wasn’t out of the realm of possibility, of course; he had imprinted on her. She just hadn’t been expecting it so soon and by Rachel’s expression, neither had she.

Rachel flushed, “With Sam and Emily’s wedding coming up he just keeps mentioning that maybe we’ll be next. I mean, I love him, I do, and it’s a nice idea, but I was hoping we would be long gone from here and settled down first. He’s been acting pretty strange lately, too, so I’m not sure if that has anything to do with it or not but he’s giving me anxiety,” her tone was joking, but the look on her face told Leah how apprehensive Rachel was to marriage in general, not necessarily with Paul.

Leah hadn’t been in an imprintee’s head, so she wasn’t quite sure how it was for them, but she knew there was more work behind their end than the imprinters. Sam had gone after Emily immediately after meeting her, but she continued to push him away at first, which told Leah it wasn’t as immediate and unbreakable as the imprinter’s side. Of course, Emily had succumbed and realized her feelings had been there, but it wasn’t as immediate. “I get that,” she said softly. “Him not being called in the middle of the night to fight a leech may be nice, too.”

“—And not sleeping on the couch at Billy’s,” Rachel added, causing Leah to laugh. 

“Maybe he meant it in a... futuristic way? You could be jumping to conclusions.” Oddly enough, she didn’t feel the hostility toward Rachel at the idea of her being engaged as she did toward Emily. Then again, Rachel wasn’t going to be engaged to her ex-boyfriend that she couldn’t seem to get over. 

“As much as I do see a life with him, I was hoping for a little more normalcy, first. Not to say I would say no--” 

“I get it, don’t worry, but don’t get too hung up on the details. As much as Paul and I butt heads, I know he loves you, I see it; frequently,” she smirked. “Everything else will work itself out.” She just hadn’t seemed to find the reasoning behind her own failed relationship yet.

“Sorry for putting this on you,” she said softly. “I just... I know Kim will end up saying something to Jared if I tell her and I don’t want Paul to think I don’t want to, I’m just a little nervous, I guess. I want forever with him, but it’s not exactly how I pictured it. I know you’ve got a lot on your plate, though. How are things with you?”

Leah shrugged, “Well I’m back here, which I’m unsure is a good thing or not.” 

“I missed you. I honestly have never seen your mom so... undone as when you and Seth left.”

“Charlie was here, so I guess I’m grateful for that. Then there’s Sam and Emily’s love-fest playing out in two weeks,” she added. 

Charlie and her mom were over talking to Renesmee and Jacob, but a part of Leah wished her mom would hate everything Cullen-related as much as she did. 

“I’ll be there to drunkenly fill you up with shots. I’ll even hold your hair back for you if you get sick.” She winked, a grin playing on her lips. “I promise, you’ll get through it, you’re like the strongest bad-ass woman I know; just like your mom.” Rachel said idly as both girls watched Sue reach out to experience Renesmee’s gift. 

“Just not as resilient as her,” Leah commented. It didn’t matter what life threw at her mother, she got up and threw back. Leah on the other hand, was stuck on Sam since the moment she laid eyes on him as a teenager. She wished she could get over the long-haired boy she fell in love with at sixteen who had since turned into a man – and found his life partner, but every part of him pulled her back in. His chest, his voice, his hair, his scent. She was brought back to her time in Forks – she greatly missed the peace of not worrying about seeing him. Even the thought of him coming tonight made her chest tighten. 

Rachel shrugged, “I left after my mom died like a coward. I left Jacob to look after dad and me and Rebecca bolted. I’m not proud about how I managed things, and I hate wanting to leave again seeing how happy my dad is now that I’m home, but I just... I can’t handle the memories here. Everywhere I go I see her. You’re stronger than I am; to put up with the memories of Sam and your dad... I can’t imagine and I’m incredibly sorry I wasn’t here when you needed someone.”

“You’re here now,” she said as Rachel hugged her again – it was probably the alcohol running through her veins that allowed her to be so open. Rachel was always carefree before her mom had passed and she managed to keep her loving persona even through her heartache. Leah was envious how everyone else seemed to stay so pleasant when something bad happened, yet her own heartache had turned her into someone she barely recognized anymore. 

“I am, and we’re getting drunk, come on.” She led Leah into the kitchen and pulled out a couple plastic shot glasses from her purse. “Got any lemon?”

Leah smirked and went over to the fridge. The girls got the salt and cut the lemon up before Rachel filled the glasses. “Oh, God,” Leah groaned. “You know what tequila does to me.” One minute she was fine, the next she was on her ass. Every. Time.

Rachel giggled, thinking back to their teenaged adventures. “Well we’re older now.” Rachel raised her shot glass, “To new memories, a new year, and new opportunities,” she proclaimed.

Leah picked up hers and grinned. “And maybe a shiny diamond ring,” she teased Rachel.

They licked the salt off their hands, hit glasses and downed the liquid inside before grabbing the lemon to suck on. 

“Fuck, I forgot how potent that was,” Leah’s face was scrunched up. Rachel had enough shots already to get used to the flavour and just giggled as Kim entered the kitchen.

“I didn’t know where you guys went,” Kim whined. “The guys are talking about sports.”

“Come take a shot,” Rachel smirked, refilling the tiny shot glasses. Unlike Leah, Kim’s annoying qualities didn’t phase Rachel.

“I think I’m good for now,” Kim protested.

“Aw, c’mon,” Rachel complained. “You only had, like, two.”

Kim rolled her eyes, but obliged and all three girls downed more shots, laughing and reminiscing on old times before they heard a knock on the door. They stayed in the kitchen, but Leah heard Sam’s voice, along with Embry, Quil, and the younger wolves as the house filled up. It was only 9 o’clock, but everyone was here now. 

“You okay?” Rachel asked Leah seeing a nostalgic look on her face.

It was the first New Years Leah had spent with Sam since their break-up. It was also five years today that she had lost her virginity to him. They got together in September in sophomore year and it didn’t take long for them to get close in every possible way. It had been one of the few nights that her parents decided to go out together. Seth went over to one of his friends from school for the night and it was only Leah left in the house. She had promised her parents she wouldn’t have a party, but she hadn’t promised she would be home alone. 

“Fine,” Leah said softly.

Rachel poured up a shot just for Leah, deciding her and Kim probably needed a few minutes to let the liquor settle. “Here, liquid courage,” she offered.

Leah took it much more easily as Emily came into the kitchen. “Hey, the guys said you were in here.”

“Hey Em,” Rachel smiled warmly. Despite the hostility between the two cousins, Rachel, Kim, and Emily always did get along.

“Is everything ready for the big day?” Kim asked happily. Sometimes, Leah wondered if she forgot about the thick animosity the subject caused between her and Emily or just did it to annoy her.

Two weeks. 

“Getting there,” Emily said simply, being forgiving of Leah’s presence. Part of her desperately wished Leah could be excited for her – this was something they had always talked about since being kids. She knew her cousin tried, and she had every right to be upset, but Emily still wished for her best friend back.

“Want some tequila?” Rachel offered, swinging the almost-empty flask around. 

Emily shook her head, “Maybe later.”

Seth poked his head into the kitchen. “Leah, can I grab you for a minute?”

Although Leah wanted to stay in the safe-haven of the kitchen to avoid Sam, her curiosity got the best of her– and the opportunity to skip overhearing any wedding details. “What’s up?”

“I need to ask you something.”

Seth led Leah out the back door. “I need you to come with me; Paul asked me to grab one of the girls – aside from Rachel.”

“What for?” Leah was a little annoyed he didn’t grab Kim or Emily, because anything involving her and Paul usually ended up in an argument.

“Just come with me.”

Leah sighed, but followed her brother. They walked the five-minute walk down to the beach and Leah’s brow furrowed. “We’re not setting off fireworks for another three hours, Seth.”

But then she saw Paul on the beach, the frost covering the rocks and sand with a white blanket. He was looking out toward the ocean but turned when he heard them approach. “Really, Leah? She is the most unromantic one of them!” Paul cried, throwing his hands up like a child.

“What do you want?” Leah asked rashly, walking down to meet him on the beach with Seth. “You’re lucky I’m even here, so make it quick.”

But then she saw it; there were pink and red string lights on the winter ground only a couple feet away, in between where the guys had placed the lanterns earlier so that they would have enough light for the fireworks. They were attached to a plug that Leah traced back to Jacob’s rabbit so they would light up.

“Is it not enough?” Paul asked nervously, rubbing the back of his neck, wishing Seth had gotten anyone but Leah for this.

The lights spelled out, ‘Rachel, will you marry me?’

“I told him it’s fine,” Seth interjected. “But he wanted a girl’s opinion.”

“Yeah, like Emily or Kim,” Paul whined again.

“It’s just enough,” Leah ignored him. “She’ll love it.” Leah hoped Rachel didn’t feel too overwhelmed. She understood her friend’s concerns, but nothing happened as you pictured it, after all. “Trust me; I’ve known her since we’ve been born.” She had never seen Paul so nervous; even though he imprinted on Rachel and everything seemed perfect between them and he knew realistically, she would say yes.

“Thanks, I’ll be up in a few minutes, okay?”

Seth nodded and he and Leah started walking back to the house.

“Sorry, Lee,” Seth said softly. “I figured it would be easier to grab you – plus it’s ‘kinda cold out and Emily or Kim wouldn’t be immune like us.”

“Whatever,” Leah said teasingly. “Rachel is kind of expecting something – not tonight, but she mentioned that Paul’s been asking some weird questions.”

“It’s nice to start the year off with something happy, though, isn’t it? Especially after earlier today.”

Leah nodded, “I am happy for them.” She was being honest.

“Maybe this year you’ll find someone?”

“Doubtful, little brother, but thanks for the optimism,” she ruffled his hair before they got back to the house.

Charlie and Sue had just left with Renesmee, so Jacob, Embry, and Quil were on the front porch, outside having a beer. It was growing close to ten o’clock and Leah would be happy when the New Year was here so her house would be empty again.

Seth stopped on the porch with the guys, so Leah decided she may as well stay out there with them, but she was craving a few more tequila shots to get through the night. She also had to find Rachel later and try to slow her friend down, so she wasn’t too drunk for what was to come later.

“Hey Leah,” Jacob said contently.

“So that answers our question!” Embry cried. 

“What?” Leah asked, raising a brow as he studied her. It was a long-known fact that Embry had a little crush on Leah. It was probably just because she was really the only girl he seen often and was forced to socialize with. That, and he had seen her naked while phasing. Leah wasn’t about to enter any kind of relationship with an un-imprinted wolf, though, and Embry didn’t exactly tickle her fancy. Sometimes she wasn’t sure if she would ever feel the way she did for Sam for anyone else.

“You do own actual clothes!” he teased. She and Embry liked to tease each other since they managed to strike up a sort of friendship in Jacob’s pack. Embry blamed it on her being away from Sam making her more tolerable, but he enjoyed the shewolf’s company - most of the time. He knew a lot of the guys used to be jealous when Sam had Leah – and despite her shorter hair and her permanent scowl lately, she used to be pretty fun-loving and the guys tended to forget with her spiteful personality that she was extremely good-looking.

Leah rolled her eyes at his futile attempt to make her laugh. “Shut it, Call.”

“One more night for old times,” Quil mentioned, gesturing to the five of them. “I guess it’s time to settle back into La Push with Sam and his disciples.” His tone was joking, but there was a hint of curiosity in his voice; as though he was egging Jacob on for any details he may have on their impending future.

Leah was immediately interested, wondering if he knew something she didn’t, but Jacob’s words confirmed they were still uncertain of everything. 

Jacob shrugged, “We’ll be having a meeting after the wedding to iron everything out, I know you guys have questions, but Sam and I still have a few things to decide on first.”

“There can’t be two alphas, can there?” Leah asked. 

“No, definitely not,” Jacob replied. “We’re working on it.” He took a sip of his beer, leaning against the railing, his face deep in thought.

“How’s Renesmee?” Seth asked.

“Good,” Jacob smiled. “They think in only a few more months she will be full-grown.”

“So does that mean you guys can be together soon?”

Jacob shrugged, “We will have to wait and see.” He was aching to have a normal imprint.

Leah slipped inside, deciding she was tired of the imprint talk, and she had to find Rachel. It wasn’t hard; however, as the music blasted some new pop song and she saw Rachel trying to teach Kim choreography in the middle of the living room amongst everyone. Leah couldn’t help but to grin as Kim tried to follow Rachel’s movements. 

“Since when do you dance?” Leah smirked, watching Rachel move to the music.

“I found it good for expressionism!” Rachel yelled over the music. “And it keeps me busy when Paul’s on patrol!”

Leah shook her head as the song came to an end and Rachel turned the music down. Jared came up to sweep Kim away and Emily was sat beside Sam on the couch, heads turned to watch the girls, laughing along with them until Leah had entered.

“You should come with me sometime,” Rachel said happily. “I go to class just outside Forks every Tuesday and Thursday evening when Paul patrols. You’d be surprised at how much energy it releases.”

”I traded in my ballet shoes in sophomore year,” Leah pointed out. When she met Sam, the only thing she had wanted to do as an extra-curricular activity was… well, him. Ballet seemed childish and she wanted Sam to see her as the mature woman she was becoming; the type of woman he wanted at his side.

“C’mon, it would be great to have a friend there. It’s a beginner’s adult class and they’re still accepting people. It’s only a small class and everyone there is really great.” Her voice lowered, and she grinned, coming up beside her friend. “Plus, there’s a really hot guy there named Jeremy who teaches it. I think if he can get enough people interested, he’s going to have a little recital here in La Push in the spring.”

“I’ll think about it,” she said; mainly just to get Rachel off her back. “I really don’t need a match-maker, though. Plus, I don’t know what our schedules will be yet.” Her ability to imprint was the only match maker she could tolerate and that wasn’t exactly working out in her favor. She did mention to Jacob about attending a meditation or yoga class, so maybe it could be a good idea to try to take out all her emotional energy into a dance class instead. At least she would have Rachel. “How are you feeling, Rach?”

“Absolutely lovely,” she giggled. “Just drunk enough. What about you?”

“Good,” she smirked. She felt the warm feeling in her tummy from the tequila but wasn’t near as drunk as she would like to be.

Rachel went and hauled another almost-full flask from her purse. “Drink this and you’ll feel much better.”

So she did. Rachel went into the kitchen with her and sat on the counter while the shewolf downed shot after shot and Rachel took one every now and then. When they finished the flask, she finally felt her head become heavy from the alcohol. 

Paul had long since come back from the beach but figured hanging out with the guys may numb his nerves a little – and more than a few beers, so he was happy to let Rachel hang out with Leah. Admittedly, the shewolf was having fun, despite her reluctance earlier. Rachel always seemed to be a breath of fresh air – at least when she wasn’t cozied up with Paul.

The girls talked and laughed and didn’t leave each other’s company until someone called out that it was almost midnight and they had to start walking down to the beach to celebrate the arrival of the New Year.

Leah jumped off the counter, and felt the ground move, the room spinning around her. Rachel reached out to steady her as both girls started laughing. Leah knew the drunk feeling wouldn’t last long; however, she was feeling pretty pain-free for now. Maybe being a wolf also upped her tolerance for tequila’s undesirable side-effects she always had when she was human.

“Are you going to be able to walk?” Rachel giggled, causing Leah to only laugh even more.

The girls stumbled out of the kitchen, laughing and Jacob met them in the living room doorway. 

“Leah?” Jacob asked, smirking at her glossed eyes. “How much have you had to drink?” He grinned as Rachel steadied her again. It was kind of amusing to see the older Clearwater let loose, he decided. 

“Just enough,” the girls laughed. 

Leah was like a brand-new deer trying to grow into her legs. Jacob let Rachel off the hook and grabbed Leah’s arm. “Are you okay?” Jacob asked her. He hadn’t had a chance to really talk to her alone since returning to La Push and in preparation for the battle, he made his pack mates run with Sam while he helped the Cullen’s, so it was very real that Leah had been intentionally avoiding him for making her go back to Sam and not knowing where they stood currently. He was pretty positive he wanted to stay in La Push, which he knew she would resent, but it was their home, and if negotiations with Sam worked out in his favor, there was no reason for them to go elsewhere.

Leah looked up at Jacob and pulled her arm away. “I’m fine,” she said before almost tripping over her own two feet, causing Jacob to grab her.

“You’re drunk,” he said. “Let me help.”

Leah rolled her eyes but didn’t fight him as he took her arm again. Tequila tended to hit her hard and maybe she did overdo it, but she wanted the buzz to last and it was the first time she drank as a wolf, so she didn’t really know her wolf-limits.

Thankfully they managed to get down to the beach and Rachel smiled when she saw Paul. She had been with Leah most of the night, which was fun, but she missed her imprint. 

“Did you know about this?” Leah asked Jacob, who was still at her side to steady her, as Rachel approached Paul. She and Jacob got down far enough, watching as Embry and Quil set up the fireworks. Leah felt the alcohol burning off slowly, but Jacob kept her arm to make sure she wasn’t about to fall flat on her face.

Jacob nodded. “He actually asked me and dad for permission. It was probably the humblest I’ve ever seen him. I don’t think I’ll ever let him forget it,” he mused.

Leah smirked and watched as Rachel went over to Paul, “That would have been something I would have loved to see.” Jared was up in Jacob’s truck and it roared to life as Rachel got down to where Paul was stood, lighting up the ground with the Christmas lights strung out in the sweet words every girl wanted to hear someday.

It took Rachel a second to realize what was happening, and as she saw the lights illuminate and Paul got down on one knee, everyone around to watch, her hands went up to cover her mouth that automatically fell open like every romance movie ever. If Leah wasn’t so happy for her friend, she would have been annoyed at how cliché it was. “Paul...”

“Rachel, I knew you were it for me from the moment I laid eyes on you. You are the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen, and I want you to be mine forever. Today really put into perspective how fragile life is, and I want to spend whatever is left of mine with you; forever. Rachel Black, will you marry me?”

Leah actually felt tears spring to her eyes, but she blinked them back. She was supposed to be this happy for Emily, she thought idly. But it made her happy to watch as Rachel started to cry and nodded quickly. Despite her friend’s concerns earlier, she knew they would figure all the details out over time. When you found your person, you just knew, right? 

“Of course, yes!” She said as Paul opened the small black box in his hand. He breathed a sigh of relief before taking it out of the box, throwing the box to the side, and slipping the small silver diamond ring onto her left hand. 

Paul picked her up and spun her around as she cried before pulling back to place a heated kiss to her lips. The guys smirked and lit the fireworks and started the New Year countdown.

Ten.  
Nine.

At least Rachel had someone to kiss on the New Year; a new fiancée. Leah pointedly kept her eyes away from Sam and Emily.

Eight.

Jacob stayed with Leah and Seth came up beside his sister, wanting to make sure she was alright.

Seven  
Six  
Five  
Four  
Three  
Two  
One.

The fireworks set off and the imprints grabbed their other halves and kissed them. Although she desperately tried not to look, her eyes made their way over to Sam and Emily, lip-locked and happily in love. She felt Jacob’s eyes on her, and he sighed, getting ready to give her a lecture on having to move on when suddenly, the shewolf felt her stomach flop. 

She pulled away from Jacob and emptied the contents of her stomach into the nearby greenery sticking up from the snow, holding her hair back from her face. Thankfully, the fireworks were more of a spectacle than her, so she didn’t draw too much attention.

“Ooh, Lee,” Jacob groaned. “Good timing.” At least they were outside. 

Seth couldn’t help but to laugh. “At least she’ll feel better.”

“Happy New Year!” The guys called as they stopped sucking face. 

Maybe next year Jacob would be able to share a New Years kiss with his own imprint. But this year? It looked like someone had to take care of Leah. Seth ran off with Collin and Brady, Rachel having retreated with Paul, and the other imprints happy on the beach watching the fireworks explode, it meant it was just him to ensure the shewolf didn’t die from alcohol poisoning, he thought spitefully. Quil came up to Jacob with Embry, and Embry frowned seeing Leah sick. “Is she okay?” Embry felt squeamish when it involved vomit, but he did feel the pull to try and help her.

Jacob smirked. “Just drank a little too much, serves her right.”

Jacob was about to go over to her, but Leah groaned and stood upright, feeling her stomach emptied. “It was the fucking tequila, and fuck you, Jake.”

Jacob started chuckling and rolled his eyes.

“You know what they say about tequila,” Embry teased. “Start stripping, Clearwater.”

Leah glared at him. “Only in your dreams, Call.”

“Party’s over,” Quil said, ready to get home. 

“What a way to start the New Year,” Leah groaned already feeling a headache coming on. 

“I’ll take her home, you guys can go.”

“I’m fine,” she protested. “Really; I can get myself to bed.”

“I want to talk to you, anyways,” Jacob said. “So, walk with me.” Jacob started walking away from the beach and she begrudgingly followed as Quil and Embry went down to spend what was left of the night with the others. 

Although her head was still a little fuzzy, she was steadier on her feet. Jacob still had to grab her arm a couple of times, but she was a lot better than before. Wolf temperatures really did burn things off super-quickly. 

“What do you want?” Leah asked as they walked. 

“I was going to ask you the same question. I haven’t seen you around much, so I wanted to check in.”

“While you’ve been tucking your precious imprint in in preparation for the battle, I’ve been on the late-night patrols, with Sam’s pack, which you already know considering they’re your orders. Doesn’t leave much time for socialization with the feeling of impending doom looming over everyone.” 

Jacob tried to ignore the hostility behind her words. “I know you may not be thrilled about being back in La Push, but I need to discuss some things with Sam after today to see where we go from here. If it’s any consolation, I’ll try to keep Paul off your patrol, in the meantime. Until we figure things out. That should earn me some brownie points, right?”

Leah looked up to him, feeling her stomach growing a little nauseous again and trying to ignore it. “Where did you get that phrase? Brownie points? You really have been spending way too much time with kids lately.” 

Jacob sighed and forced the urge to roll his eyes; she was drunk, but her hostility was, admittedly, kind of valid. “I just wanted to check in and make sure there’s no bad feelings. You’re still my Beta, after all.” He had learned a lot about the infamous Clearwater when they were on their own, but some part of him believed he had still only scratched the surface.

“Nope, no hard feelings,” she said, her words laced with sarcasm as her defense mechanism. She wasn’t a big fan of him right now, but she could hardly tell him that she resented him for imprinting and dragging her back to La Push. 

They weren’t far from Leah’s house when she felt her stomach tighten again. “You should go, I’ll be fine.”

“You look pretty green, Lee.” Jacob admitted. “Are you-“

Leah hung back as he kept walking and felt her stomach expel more of the golden liquid she had drank. Jacob did go over to her this time and he managed to hold her hair back for her. “Jesus, Leah, how much did you drink?” Seeing Bella deathly ill on Renesmee caused his own stomach to harden, and he did feel a sense of responsibility for his pack-mate so he wanted to make sure she got home okay.

“A full flask of tequila,” she said softly as she started to feel a little better again. “And then some.”

She stood upright, but her head was spinning a little and she stumbled. Jacob put a steadying hand on her back and chuckled. “Are you having fun being stupid and reckless?” 

“Whatever, amuse yourself now because don’t worry - I’m never drinking tequila again,” she said softly, taking a deep breath in. She felt his hand on her lower back and her muscles tightened in response. “You really don’t have to be here for this, I’ll survive.”

Jacob chuckled. “You’re almost home, now, come on.” 

They made it the short distance back to the Clearwater’s house – which seemed much longer than usual to Leah. “I’ll nurse my own hangover from here, thanks, though.” Jacob was about to turn and leave – satisfied she could get herself to bed, before Leah smirked. “I would be wary about going back to your place, though,” she mused.

“And why’s that?” He turned to face her on the front step. 

“The newly engaged couple may be there, so be careful to what you’re walking into,” she smirked and turned the knob to her front door.

Jacob groaned, “Really, Leah? Mental images!”

“I’m sure Paul will have plenty; you should probably avoid him during patrol, too.”

“Sometimes I’m jealous of all the people who haven’t met you,” he mused. 

Leah just smirked. “I would slap you, but that would be animal abuse.”

“How long have you been waiting to use that one, Clearwater?”

“Did you like it?” 

He shook his head in response, but there was a hint of a grin playing at the corners of his lips. “You’ll go far someday; hopefully you’ll stay there.”

“Trust me when I say that will make the both of us incredibly happy,” she mused, the honesty of her woods seeping through their banter.

“Goodnight, Leah,” Jacob called before turning on his heel. “Don’t let the vamps bite.”

Leah rolled her eyes and went inside and downed a couple glasses of water before collapsing on her bed and quickly drifting to sleep, hoping her hangover headache would be short-lived. 

* * * *

Jacob went over to Emily’s early the next morning for him and Sam to discuss their packs. They had a lot to decide on to figure out where to go from here and with neither alpha backing down, Jacob could tell today would probably be long and fruitless, too, but they needed a decision soon. Sam’s wedding was only two weeks away and then he would be gone for two weeks with Emily. They were only going into Port Angeles, but Sam promised Emily (emergencies aside) he would step away for those two weeks and spend the time focused on them.

Sam came down over the stairs after pulling on a t-shirt and a pair of khaki shorts. He had over-slept for the meeting because he and Emily had been up late together. “Hey, sorry,” he opened the door to let Jacob inside.

Jacob was a little surprised that he didn’t smell breakfast cooking. Emily was always up with the birds to ensure they were fed - Emily really was the pack’s backbone. He sat at the kitchen table as the woman in question arrived downstairs, hair up on top of her head, after having thrown on a robe over her pajama pants and tank top. 

“Morning, Jacob,” she said happily. “Bacon and Eggs?” 

Sam kissed her cheek as she entered the kitchen and she smiled. “That sounds perfect, Em, thank you.”  
Emily took out some pans and got the ingredients out of the fridge and Sam took a seat opposite Jacob. “Late night ringing in the New Year?” Jacob teased.

Sam chuckled. “You could say that. Actually, I think my and Emily’s talk last night may benefit our conversation.”

“Please bestow me with the opportunity of learning how your pillow talk could benefit the pack?” Jacob asked curiously.

Emily was within earshot, but she tried not to eavesdrop. She turned on the radio to listen to the news as she cooked. She enjoyed taking care of the pack; it helped her feel important in the grand scheme of things – like she had a purpose other than being a housewife and part-time college instructor. She always wanted an important job, but once Sam imprinted on her, it was very clear where she belonged.

“I need you to keep this between us,” he said sternly. “And I don’t want Leah to know yet, not until Emily and I can speak with her.”

Jacob raised a brow. “Okay?”

“The pack’s growing numbers have given me a little bit of a headache,” he admitted. “I’ve managed, but with you guys back there’s another five wolves again and it’s been a little hectic for me to manage everyone and tend to my home life. We both know you’re the rightful alpha, which means with the growing numbers you’ll have a much easier time managing them. Emily and I were talking last night and we’ve decided it is time for me to take a step back from the pack, so despite our... earlier disagreements, I’m well aware the pack will be safe in your hands and I am intending to step back after the wedding. I’m handing the reigns over to you, Jacob.”

Jacob was so confused. “What caused this change of heart? Are you doing this for Emily? And what does this have to do with Leah?” Was he really going to give up just like that? 

“Emily,” Sam called. “Can you come over here?”

Emily left the stove and went over next to Sam, his arm wrapping around her waist. “Emily and I are expanding our family.” He said happily, beaming up at the beautiful woman. Emily flushed a deep scarlet but looked extremely happy at Sam’s words.

It frustrated Jacob a little to see everyone moving on and getting engaged, married, and having kids, when he was still on babysitting duty himself. He loved Renesmee, but he wished he could have the normal relationship everyone else seemed to have. That thought alone also caused him to question his own imprint – Quil didn’t complain about Claire being a child, he was quite eager and willing to wait as long as it took to be with her. He, on the other hand, always seemed to be questioning his own imprint and wishing for normalcy. It didn’t sit well with him, but he tried to push that feeling away.

Only a few more months, he told himself.

“Congratulations,” he said uneasily. “So… you decided this last night?” 

Emily nodded, “Well, actually, we found out three weeks ago that I’m... uh, already pregnant. I’m eight weeks along as of tomorrow.”

Jacob’s eyes instinctively went to her stomach, but there was nothing to see - she looked the same. “Wow, I mean… that’s awesome news. I’m really happy for you guys.”

Sam beamed up at his wife-to-be as she spoke, ”I don’t want to take him away from the pack, that’s not my intention, but Sam and I decided it would be best to be home a little more because I haven’t been feeling the best – and he knows you’re very capable.” 

Jacob grinned despite his kind of lame win, but then realized the underlying message here: Leah. “So that’s what this has to do with Leah.”

Emily frowned at the mention of her cousin. “I want to be the one to tell her.”

“No worries,” Jacob replied. “I certainly don’t want to be the messenger on that one.”

“We’re going to wait until Emily is farther along to tell her, after we have our first ultrasound when we get back from our honeymoon,” Sam said. “We’re going to wait to tell everyone then, but we wanted to let you know the reasoning behind our decision. When Emily brought it up last night, to step back, it finally felt right.”

Jacob sighed. Leah finally seemed like she was in somewhat of a good place, and he felt bad for the shewolf. She was getting hit with more than she deserved, and the year had only just started. Honestly, it was bound to come sometime, surely, she knew that, but he knew it would still sting. Her own infertility was something they all knew she struggled with. This would be a double-edged sword.

Jacob felt bad for himself, too, knowing he would be the one to deal with her after she got the news; him and the other guys. So much for their newfound peace and quiet. Emily retreated to cooking breakfast and he sighed. Maybe he would have to exile himself to the day shift with Paul, and exile Leah to the night shift, even if it meant listening to Paul’s obsessive inner monologue about his sister. Neither option was desirable at this point. Leah’s broken heart knew no bounds, and Paul loved to test Jacob’s patience. Maybe he should just put them on the same shift, that could solve everything… except Leah would probably kill him, or her and Paul would kill each other.

Jacob turned his attention back to the current topic of discussion and decided to take the punches as they came with his pack-mates. “Well, I’m happy for you guys -- and very happy we’ve come to an understanding. When will we get everyone else together?”

“I want you to take some time to think about things, first. You’re going to want to alter some things to your own preference, so I figured the morning after the wedding we could call a quick meeting before Emily and I go out of town. That will give you enough time to think it through and pick your Beta.”

Pick his Beta?

“Leah is my Beta.” Or was, anyways.

Sam nodded, “I know she was, but if you’re merging the packs there are other options so I didn’t know what you were going to want to do in regards to that.”

He was right, there were more options now than there had been in his pack for Beta, but... well, Leah had shown she was worthy. She listened, obeyed orders, and kicked his ass when needed, though Sam was right; there were stronger fighters to pick from. Not to mention the hostility he would face from Jared if he didn’t keep him as his right-hand man as Sam had. “I guess I never really considered it.”

“That’s why I want to give you time before we try to answer questions from the others.”

Emily went back to cooking breakfast, in a complete daze of happiness thinking about the small baby growing in her belly. It only made her love Sam more and she was so excited to be a mom. It still nagged at her, though, that she was living Leah’s life. Every good thing that happened between her and Sam, she remembered Leah telling her all about how she couldn’t wait for it to happen for them. Being intimate, getting engaged, married, kids. It all was something Leah had claimed with Sam and it was so hard to be completely happy when she knew her happiness was making her cousin – and best friend, miserable. Emily tried to give it back to her as soon as Sam started pursuing her, but… well, there was chemistry. Strong, intense chemistry that made it impossible to stay away from the imprint. She felt whole with him.

Jacob sighed. “Well, I would advise you stick to the day shifts for the next couple of weeks,” he said. “Leah’s going to be doing nights until the wedding. That, and I could use the extra authority to shut Paul up about him and Rachel.” The night of the wedding the Cullen’s would be on alert.

“Noted,” Sam said. “I wish there was something I could do for her.”

It took him a second to realize he was talking about Leah. Jacob shrugged, “It’s not your fault.”

“No, but she still blames me.”

“Yeah, well, she’s hurt,” Jacob said as though it wasn’t the obvious elephant in the room everyday. 

“She told you that?” Sam asked, frowning. His happiness always seemed to be clouded with his broken heart for Leah. He knew Leah was still hurting, but she wouldn’t admit it – especially not to him who she tried to avoid as much as possible. He wished he could do something, anything, to make her happy again. The shewolf always masked her true feelings, so Sam found it surprising that her and Jacob - of all people, had gotten that close in such a short period of time. 

Jacob nodded hesitantly. “I tried to send her back here when she joined my pack, but she refused. She said she would rather take orders from me and protect the Cullen’s than stand in the way of your happiness – and her own. I guess it was the first time that I actually felt bad for her, so I let her stay.” He hoped she did start taking those classes she mentioned, because she was going to need an outlet for her energy. Unlike him, she couldn’t break off and runaway to Canada just because she was unhappy - the long-standing joke of the pack.

Sam was well aware it was his fault the fun-loving girl he knew and loved was so unhappy and it killed him, but he was forever loyal to his imprint. 

“Maybe I can talk to her?” Emily asked innocently. 

Jacob shrugged, “Maybe it’s best to leave her be for now. Anyhow, I should get going.”

“Do you want breakfast?”

“I’m good, but thanks, Emily – I’m exhausted. I’m going to go home and try to get some sleep.”

“You’ve been up all night?” Emily asked, concerned for him.

“Yup, thanks to our favorite female wolf.”

Sam raised a brow, “What?”

Shit. That didn’t come out right. “Leah decided to tell me it probably wasn’t a good idea to go home – considering dad was out and Paul and Rach were already gone, and when I got home the lights were on so I decided to curl up in the woods in my wolf to avoid walking in on anything, but I didn’t really get much sleep."

Emily smiled. “It’s sweet what Paul did for her.”

“Not when you have to live with them and now, they’ll be worse than ever,” Jacob noted. 

Sam chuckled. “Well when Nessie gets old enough, I’m sure you’ll be sickening, too,” he grinned. 

“Yeah, whatever,” Jacob groaned. He would do anything for Renesmee and loved every minute with her, but it was so hard to be stuck waiting for his own happily ever after to start. “For now, I think it’s best if we just keep my pack on the night shift and keep you and your pack on the day shift. Until I can figure everything out and then do up a new patrol schedule.”

Sam nodded, “That works. I want to be home with Emily in the evenings, anyways.”

It was the easy decision, but also one that came to him whilst wondering how to mediate Leah with Sam and Paul for the time being. Keeping them separate wouldn’t be possible long-run, especially since he would need her to delegate some of his responsibility as Alpha if he chose her as his Beta, but for now, until they told everyone else what was going on and he for-sure decided on his pick for Beta, it worked and he, too, could avoid Paul’s obsessive inner-monologue about his sister.

“Glad we finally got this resolved,” Jacob said, extending his hand to Sam. “And congratulations to you both.”

They shook on it before Jacob retreated home to bed.


	2. Best Of Me

A week went by quickly, at least for Jacob. Wracking his brain to try and figure out what he wanted to accomplish as Alpha took up a lot of his free time. He was really stuck on who to choose as a Beta and took the week off patrol to try and figure out what was best for the pack. 

Leah was the easy choice; they had been proven thus far to work. She listened, obeyed orders, was the fastest of them all, and she made him question things when necessary. On the other hand, he could always stick with Sam’s right-hand man, Jared. They did get along pretty well, but as he thought more about it, he felt more comfortable with someone from his pack to stand by him and the only suitable option from his pack was Leah; Seth was too young and Embry and Quil wouldn’t be able to kick his ass quite as efficiently as Leah since they were his buddies. Leah didn’t care whether Jacob liked her, so she spoke her mind.

The only real issues he could think of with naming Leah was the power could go to her head. That, and it was plausible that Paul, Jared, and many of the other guys may not be submissive to her orders or receptive to her hard-ass attitude at times (though, he had to admit that she had gotten a lot better), and she wasn’t as big and strong as the other guys for battle. Neither of those things really made Jacob worried about choosing her, though, aside from maybe having to play a mediator role at times. Realistically, that came with Alpha territory when Leah was around regardless of if she was somewhat in charge or not. Paul and the others would get over it, they would have no other choice, and if the rogue vampires stayed at-bay, they wouldn’t have any physical battles to fight. Some of them may even be able to get their phasing under control. 

That was the last and most problematic thing for Jacob; Leah had told him already about her desire to stop-phasing, so would she want to continue to be the Beta? She hated La Push and being a wolf too much, but with the wedding and a baby coming, Jacob wasn’t sure she would physically be able to stop phasing just yet. It took a clear mind and a calm person to be able to stop and that would be everything Leah was not. She would need more than meditation or anger management classes to calm her wild spirit and maybe having some power in the pack could give her the peace of mind she needed to actually ease her into her human life again.

It didn’t hurt to ask her before blind-siding her at the meeting. He really should give her a heads-up anyways before announcing his choice in a room full of the pack members. If she said no, he could explore other options, but he wasn’t sure who would be the next one he would consider. Sam would be ideal considering his leadership role in the pack prior, but he knew their two alpha personalities would not mesh well together; they were both too dominant and had proven thus far not to work together in a pack-setting. They were fundamentally different. Plus, Sam wanted less responsibility and Jacob knew that meant a non-leadership role. Every one of the guys brought something to the table, but who would mesh well with him?

“Jacob?” Billy called out from the living room, breaking Jacob from his ever-present internal dilemma.

Jacob got off his bed as the afternoon sun starting to peak through the half-opened blinds. When Billy saw Jacob materialize in the doorway of the living room, he re-positioned his wheelchair, so he was facing him. “Have you decided who you’re going to pick yet?” His father asked. The elders were aware of the changing pack status as both he and Sam met with them both separately to try and arrange terms both parties would be okay with and ensure the best protection for their home. Although Billy worried about Jacob sometimes – he was a very strong-willed and emotional person, he knew his son was born to be the pack’s leader and he would serve them proud. He wanted someone as equally strong beside his son to help him make the tough decisions the alpha title required. 

Jacob shook his head, “Not officially, why?”

“I was thinking it may be good to keep Jared close,” Billy said honestly. “He’s familiar with the Beta role and he’s very quick to see things.” He had the best vision in the group.

Jacob nodded, “I’ve considered keeping him. Leah was my Beta in my pack, though, and she’s proved reliable.”

Billy considered the idea for a long moment, making Jacob squirm. “Well, she’s not as big as the other wolves, but she is fast. She has certainly come a long way from the original wolf she began as, but do you think she’s able to be second in command to all those guys? To Sam?”

“I think the guys will listen to her, they’ll have no other choice,” Jacob said strongly. “I trust her, and I think she’s capable.”

Billy nodded, “Well if that’s who you feel comfortable with.”

“What is it?” His dad usually let him make his own mistakes, even though he was highly opinionated. A part of Jacob thought Billy kept his opinions to himself more with him because didn’t want Jacob to leave like his sisters had. 

“Nothing, I love Leah like a daughter, Jacob,” he had always been around Leah and Seth growing up as he had been extremely close with Harry. He had been there for Sue when Harry had died and made sure both children knew he was there if they needed anything – he knew how hard his wife’s death was on his kids and he wanted them to know they had a support system, especially after phasing. “But I just don’t think she’s up to the title.” Jacob looked at his dad unhappily and Billy frowned. “Leah has been through a lot, Jacob and she’s let it affect her.”

Jacob shrugged, “Everyone in the pack has been through a lot. You haven’t seen her since we’ve got back; she’s changed a lot. Trust me, the last person I ever wanted to be around was Leah, but she was a good Beta and I think she’s finally accepting of everything that happened.” At least, kind of, but with the news of Emily’s impending pregnancy entered his mind, he wondered if his dad was right. Would she be able to keep a cool head?

Billy knew Jacob was right; he hadn’t seen Leah since before Jacob left La Push with her and Seth. He just wanted an equal counterpart to help his son rule the tribe and if he felt that was Leah, as alpha, that probably was the best decision, Billy was just a worrier. “How about we invite Charlie, Allison, Sue, Leah, and Seth to dinner tonight?”

“Dad, I haven’t asked her yet—“

“I know, I know, I won’t say anything,” Billy put his hand up. “It’s been a while since we’ve all been together, and I haven’t seen Leah or Seth since you guys got back, so let’s do dinner.”

Jacob sighed. “I’m supposed to go see Renesmee, plus Leah is working the night shift tonight.” He was off until tomorrow night, with Quil. 

“Go before. Or after,” Billy suggested. “Aren’t Quil and Embry doing nights, too? They can hold down the fort for tonight. It’s been pretty quiet here lately – Leah can join them after.”

“You’ve got an answer for everything, don’t you?” Jacob teased. He loved his dad and he knew he only wanted the best for him and his sisters. “And since when did you and Allison start becoming close?”

“We’ve hung out recently; she’s a very interesting woman.”

Even his dad had a romantic interest! He couldn’t wait for these next few months to be over. “I’m glad you had someone around while I was gone.”

“I’m very resourceful, son,” Billy winked. “I’ll give Sue a call; you get going and see Renesmee in the meantime.”

Jacob looked at the clock on the wall: 1 PM. “Alright, I’ll be back before dinner.”

Jacob got ready, threw on a fresh t-shirt and a pair of jeans and left. He opted for his motorcycle and it didn’t take him long to arrive in front of the Cullen’s mansion. He pushed the kickstand on his bike down and parked it in front of the house before going up and inside without knocking.

Esme smiled as she emerged from the kitchen on the main floor. “Hello, Jacob,” she said kindly. “Renesmee is in the kitchen baking with Rosalie.”

“Baking with blondie?” Jacob smirked. “I hope they have some to share.”

Every time Jacob saw Renesmee, she was bigger, and today was no different. Growing rapidly, Jacob could estimate her age around twelve now, just by the growth of her hair and the maturity taking precedence where once her childish features were. “Jacob!” Nessie said happily as he walked into the kitchen. “We’re making muffins. Do you want one?”

“Of course, Ness – one that you made, of course.” He grinned at the blond vampire; he wasn’t eating something blondie may have had the opportunity to spit in. “Hey Rose?” Jacob said slyly. “Why does it take a blonde so long to refill the saltshaker?” Rosalie ignored him, as usual and barely missed a beat in helping Renesmee pour the batter into the muffin pans, but Jacob continued. “She finds it difficult to get the salt into all the little holes.” He snickered as Rosalie rolled her eyes.

Renesmee giggled, knowing her Jacob and Aunt Rosalie always liked to bicker. As her aunt put the trays into the heated oven and left the kitchen, Renesmee got down off her stool and walked over to Jacob, wrapping her arms around his waist. Jacob smiled; she was definitely growing; her head now brushed the bottom of his chest – given he was 6’7”. 

“Aunt Alice says I’ve grown another inch,” she said proudly, pulling back. She was just getting to the age where she noticed boys. Not that she had anyone to really look at aside from Jacob, of course. She never left the house for long. But Jacob was cute. She felt her cheeks warm at the thought. He was like her brother, of course, but it was getting increasingly more difficult not to notice the manly features he portrayed – and how good she felt beside him.

“You’re getting there,” Jacob said happily as she took his hand and started leading him outside. “Where are we going?”

Despite her youthful look, Renesmee was wise beyond her years – still aging to her full mental capacity but learning more every day. It really wouldn’t be long, like Sam said, until they could have a normal relationship. He felt at-ease being with her, regardless of their non-romantic relationship – like he was right where he was supposed to be, but in a different way than he saw through Sam’s eyes. It was probably just because he was a brother to Renesmee and not what Sam and Emily had grown to obtain. 

“I want to show you what Uncle Emmett made me,” she said happily, opening the doors to the backyard onto the large deck. Jacob didn’t see it at first until she pointed up at the trees before them. “Look.”

A large tree house was mounted between two aged trees branches, high up. Jacob momentarily grew worried for her safety having it so high, but then realized she wasn’t fully human – something he sometimes had to frequently remind himself of. “That’s pretty cool, Ness,” he admitted. 

“Come up!”

Renesmee jumped up on the balcony and Jacob watched as she jumped down to the ground gracefully, landing perfectly. Jacob did the same but landed with a little less grace. The two climbed up effortlessly to the tree house and Renesmee climbed in first. Emmett had put pillows, blankets, and dolls up there for her. Emmett meant well, but she was past playing with dolls; he always seemed to forget she aged mentally faster than she did physically. If he had to pin-point her mental capacity, he would probably put her at fifteen. Carlisle was continually working with her mind development, so he made a mental note to mention it to the older vampire to see exactly where she was.

Jacob climbed in awkwardly, the house crammed with the two of them. He managed to get somewhat comfortable and hunch his shoulders down as Renesmee giggled. 

“Jacob?” Renesmee asked innocently, reaching her hand up.

Jacob instinctively leaned forward, knowing she wanted to show him something. She placed her hand on his cheek and showed him what she remembered of their relationship since birth – which was everything. She ended with the bracelet he had given her Christmas time, only two weeks prior and then dropped her hand. She didn’t want to show him how she felt about him and how those feelings were changing, mostly because she was a little embarrassed. It was the one concept she hadn’t been able to wrap her head around so far.

“Why did you show me that, Ness?” Jacob’s brow was arched, his face inquisitive.

“My mom says this bracelet is a promise bracelet,” Renesmee said softly, pushing up the long-sleeved shirt on her arm to reveal the gift Jacob had given her.

Jacob nodded, “It’s to promise that I’ll always be here to protect you.”

Renesmee nodded, looking intently at the intricate details of the hand-made gift. “Like my big brother.” It wasn’t a question, more of a statement. Maybe the things she was beginning to feel for Jacob were unfounded. 

“For now,” Jacob said finally. “We’re imprinted, Ness. You know how I’m a wolf?”

Nessie was compelled to listen, and she nodded, looking into Jacob’s chocolate eyes. “Yes.”

“Well, there’s a thing called imprinting that some wolves do. It’s something that is chosen for us and we’re not really sure why it happens.”

“Imprinting,” she said, letting the word mull over in her mind. She had heard her mother and father talking about it before, but Jacob hadn’t brought it up directly before – just that they had a ‘bond.’

“I’ve imprinted on you,” he explained. “Right now, I’m your brother; your protector, and once you’re older that may change.”

“Change?”

Jacob knew this was a very sensitive topic, especially since she was still so young, but Jacob saw the curiosity in her eyes. He was only sixteen when he fell in love with Bella and her mental capacity wasn’t too far behind that point. “Do you remember Sam?” 

“Yes, the black wolf,” she said happily. She liked Sam; he always played with her when she was around the reservation.

Jacob nodded, “He imprinted on Emily and they’re getting married in a couple of weeks. And my sister, Rachel, was imprinted on by Paul and they’re going to be getting married.” The last one wasn’t as happy of a situation for him - mostly because of Paul’s obsessive inner monologue of sharing too much, but he tried to keep too much hostility out of his voice – after all, he made his sister happy and that was all he wanted for her.

“So it means we’re going to get married?” Renesmee asked, brows furrowed. She hadn’t been expected an answer so final; that her future was already planned out, but she had to admit the thought of being Jacob’s forever was extremely satisfying. He was her Jacob, after all.

Jacob smiled at her words, “It means that’s what generally happens, but it’s all about what you want when you get older. I love you, like a sister, and I would do anything for you, but once you grow up, those feelings are expected to change for the both of us.”

Renesmee thought about it for a few, long moments. Was that why she was having these feelings for Jacob? Was it only because of this imprinting thing? She didn’t want to ask him – it felt weird, but she really had no one else to ask. “Aunt Alice says it won’t be long until I’m full-grown,” she said gently. “So then will we get married?”

Jacob didn’t see Renesmee confused very often, but she was visually concerned. He reached out to put a hand on hers, feeling the soothing closeness, hoping it would translate to her, too and he tried not to show her the smile playing on the corners of his lips at the innocence of her words - he wanted her to be able to ask him anything. “We can talk about this someday if things change and go there,” he told her easily. “Why did you bring this up?”

Renesmee’s cheeks flushed, but she felt comforted by Jacob. “I’ve just been noticing things lately,” she stated simply, not willing to give him anymore of an explanation. 

Jacob could tell by her vague answer he wasn’t getting anything else, so he just nodded. “You can ask me anything, okay, Ness? I only want what is best for you, now and always. Whatever that means, alright?”

Nessie smiled up at Jacob, feeling the sincerity of his words. “I’m just trying to understand everything, I guess.” She tried to get her thoughts together momentarily and Jacob waited patiently. “Is the only reason I like you because of the imprint?”

Jacob tried not to dwell on the fact that she said she liked him too much; of course she did, he had been a constant in her life since she was born, but his inner wolf jumped for joy and he chuckled, “Well I really hope it’s more than that,” he teased. Though, he thought back to Kim and Jared and how he didn’t have any interest in Kim before the imprint. “Imprinting is supposed to be... symbolic, I guess, of our ability to be together. Fate has decided that we would be happy together.” At least that was the only way he could describe it – no one really knew why it happened, they only had theories. The theory of fertility concerned him - as the idea of that didn’t exactly make sense to anyone in their situation, so maybe that theory was completely unfounded and imprinting just happened to make a stronger wolf. “You make my wolf happy; stronger.”

“I am happy when I’m with you,” she agreed idly, shuffling her body so that she could lean her head against his shoulder. Jacob felt a flicker of maturity for the first time with Renesmee in that moment, but it was fleeting. He told himself she still had months to go until they could talk about anything more permanent. 

“I’m happy with you, too, Ness. That’s all that matters.” He looked down at her and paused, “Can you promise me something?”

She nodded, looking up to meet his chocolate gaze. “Of course.”

“Please just be honest with me, okay? I know imprinting is a little... well, strange. Just know you can come talk to me, always, about anything. I’m growing in this process with you and I don’t want you to ever be scared to ask me something.”

She smiled and nodded. “I promise.” 

* * * * *

Her mom came in her room, shaking her shoulder and calling her name. Leah jumped, sweat coating her skin. “Leah, shh, Leah, you’re okay.”

Opening her eyes, Leah sat up in bed and put her hands over her face, rubbing it. It was that dream again.

“I thought these were getting better?” Sue asked softly. “What was it this time?” 

Leah blinked back the tears that the memory sprung to her eyes and tried to calm her erratic breathing. “The one where he left,” she stared blankly, her voice void of all emotion. “They had gotten better. Until we came back.” It had only been a week, but she had to admit she was beginning to understand why Jacob thought she was unhappy with him for bringing her back here – because, well, now that she had time to settle in, she missed the freedom Forks offered, and kind of was blaming him. 

Sue frowned, reaching over to hug her daughter tightly. The wedding no-doubt was still tormenting her daughter as it grew closer. “Oh, Leah, don’t do this if you don’t want to, you don’t have to stand for Emily, I really want you to know that. No one will think any less of you.”

That evoked a lifeless laugh from Leah’s lips as her mother pulled back to study her daughters’ features. As time went on, Leah wasn’t getting any better – her heart wasn’t mending, and Sue was really starting to worry about her. “You’re the one who said I should do it – for closure, or whatever.” Leah had been the ultimate decision-maker, though, and Emily had taken her off-guard when she had asked. The only real acceptable answer when someone asks you to be a bridesmaid was, well, yes. She still felt it sickly amusing how she wanted to make amends for being mean to the girl who stole her future, but Emily was… well, Emily. They had history; they were family.

“Not if it’s going to have the opposite effect,” she said softly, reaching up to smooth Leah’s hair. 

“What’s done is done; I have to live with it.”

Sue was very proud of her daughter for being so strong. She knew it was only times like these that Leah took off her mask and let her true emotions show. Unfortunately, Sue knew it would probably speed up Leah’s healing process if she felt her emotions more often and dealt with them rather than keep them bottled up. She knew this was a unique situation, however, with their phasing involved. 

“Did you give anymore thought to those classes we talked about?” Sue asked.

“Rachel mentioned these dance classes she goes to, so maybe I’ll do that. I have to look into the community college, too.” 

“I can get you some information on that,” Sue promised, looking down at her watch. “Get a shower and get ready, I told Billy we would go over for dinner in a couple hours, okay? Maybe you and Rachel can discuss those classes a little more.” 

Leah nodded and Sue left her daughter’s room with a heavy heart. Looking over at the clock, Leah sighed and fell back down on her sheets. 3PM. Why they were going to Billy’s tonight, she didn’t know, especially when she had to patrol later that night again. She really just wanted to be left alone to sleep.

Regardless, she got up and jumped in the shower before blow drying her hair, moisturizing her skin, and looking out the window to see the ground covered with a layer of snow. By the time Leah threw on a pair of jeans and a navy colored v-neck t-shirt in between getting ready and watching the comedy channel on TV, it was almost 4:30 PM.

Going downstairs, Leah grabbed a sweater to at least try to appear human in the thirty-degree temperature and found her mom in the kitchen. “When are we leaving?”

Sue grabbed the dessert she made from the fridge and turned to her daughter. “Seth’s in the car, let’s go.”

It only took them a couple minutes to make their way over to the Black’s. “Why exactly are we doing this?” Leah asked as they pulled into the driveway.

Sue smiled and turned the vehicle off. “Billy was nice enough to invite us over, Charlie is working, but I told him we would come. He said he hasn’t seen you guys since you got back and wanted to bring everyone together.”

They all got out of the SUV and Seth ran inside, happy to spend some time with Jacob. Leah followed her mom in, and Billy greeted them in the porch. “Glad you guys could come.”

Sue smiled and leaned down to hug him and thank him for the invitation before transferring her dessert into the fridge.

“Leah,” Billy said happily. “Welcome back.”

“Thanks, Billy,” Leah said politely before they all congregated into the living room with Jacob, Rachel, Allison, and Paul joining them. It was weird to see Allison there - Sam’s mom, after finding out about the whole imprinting thing, was extremely sympathetic to Leah’s situation, but it was still hard to find any kind of normalcy with the kind woman since she had dated her son - and it ended in a less than stellar situation. Allison greeted Leah regardless and gave her a warm, motherly smile that Leah tried to return.

“Hey Leah!” Rachel said happily, moving over on the couch so she could sit by her. 

”Rach,” Leah greeted, sliding beside her. “How’s the newly engaged thing going?”

”Surreal,” Rachel giggled happily. “I still have concerns; one’s we’ve talked about, but I’m really happy.”

”I told you it would work out.”

Rachel reached over and unexpectedly pulled Leah into a hug. “You’re the best.” Leah returned the embrace and smiled as they pulled away. “We’re throwing an engagement party - you have to come.”

”I’m not really into the whole engagement party thing-”

”I’m not taking no for an answer,” Rachel said pointedly. “You have to come – the weekend before Valentines’ Day.”

”Have your people contact my people,” Leah smirked. 

”Jeremy’s accepting newbies the week after Sam and Emily’s wedding,” Rachel said happily.

”What?”

”The dance classes I told you about.”

”Oh, yeah, sure.”

”You’re going to go?” She asked excitedly.

”It can’t hurt.” 

”Dinner’s ready!”

Everyone got up from where they were in the living room and congregated into the kitchen where Jacob was helping Billy set the table. There were chicken, ribs, and wings lining the counter along with salads, corn, and potatoes and Leah’s stomach growled at the sight. She was starving - as per usual.

”Dig in.”

Everyone got their plates, picked up their food, and took a seat at the table. It was more than a little tight space-wise, but they made do. Jacob slid into the chair beside her, Seth on the other side, and Leah quirked a brow. “If you sit there, Paul may get suspicious,” Leah commented to Jacob as he grabbed the tongs of the salad on the table.

He quirked a brow, “What are you talking about?” He filled what little room that was left his plate with salad before turning his attention to her.

”He may think you actually don’t hate me,” she said tauntingly. “Could be bad for your reputation, after all - just trying to look out for you.”

Jacob snorted before filling his mouth with a fork-full of dinner. “I think you’re the one who should be scared - he may think you like me.”

Leah acted disgusted and she dug into her food. “You’re… tolerable, at best. Outside of La Push, anyways.”

Jacob shook his head and Billy watched the two’s interactions from across the table; he had to be sure Jacob was making a good decision asking Leah to be his Beta. “We should probably keep any interactions between us outside of the border - to keep up appearances. You’re right, we really can’t afford the guys thinking that we don’t hate each other.”

”Speak for yourself,” Leah teased between mouthfuls. The table was loud with chatter; Allison asking all about Rachel’s schooling, Seth busy laughing with Paul, and Sue and Billy in conversation. 

”So Leah,” Billy said from across the table. “What made you follow Jacob to the Cullen’s?” He wanted to hear the loyalty his son told him about - to see why exactly he wanted to have Leah as his right-hand woman. 

It was no secret that Leah hated the leeches; but Billy hadn’t been there the night she split from Sam’s pack. Leah swallowed the lump rising in her throat, and Jacob gave his dad a look that told him it didn’t matter - not to go there.

”I just thought Jacob was right,” Leah lied. “I mean, Renesmee didn’t do anything - we were supposed to protect humans.” It was a load of bullshit, and anyone within a million miles could smell it - but Sam’s mom was there, and she really didn’t need to know the real reason Leah’s last straw finally had crumbled that night. No one but Jacob and the guys knew.

Billy nodded curiously. “I mean, I just remember Paul telling me how you stood up for Sam’s pack when Sam wanted to go against the pregnancy. I was just curious what would drive you to change your mind so quickly.”

”Dad-” Jacob tried to cut in, but Leah looked to Jacob, her eyes telling him she could handle herself without him intervening. 

Everyone’s eyes were on her at the dinner table. Seth and Jacob hadn’t been there when Leah decided to split, but Paul had. “I had to protect Seth - he had left, and I wasn’t about to let him-”

”Oh come on, Leah,” Paul sighed. “You can use Seth as an excuse all you want, but everyone knows why you became the Cullen’s lapdog.”

”Did he ask you?” Leah asked sharply. “Or can you ever keep your damn mouth shut?”

”Leah,” Sue chastised. 

”Paul,” Jacob said strongly, not wanting to mediate a brawl - plus he was still hungry and wanted to finish his plate and get seconds before the other wolves finished and took whatever was left.

”I’m just saying, you want us to understand and whatever, so how about some honestly, Leah?” Paul said openly. It wasn’t only his opinion, but he was one of the few to voice it to her. He wasn’t scared of Leah; they butted heads from day one, and he was tired of being a part of her pity party. “Everyone knows you left to get away from Sam, so stop hiding behind Seth.”

In efforts to avoid taking Paul’s head off, Leah got up from the table and grabbed her sweater before quickly leaving the house.

”Really?” Jacob groaned, getting up to go after her. “How about what she said? Can you keep your mouth shut for once in your life, Paul?” Jacob went out the front door of the house after hearing Rachel hit Paul’s arm and Billy apologize to Sue, who was exhausted from trying to help her daughter. 

“Leah,” Jacob called as she stalked off the edge of his front lawn. 

“Leave me alone!” She cried, turning on her heel to face him. 

“Leah, c’mon, you know how Paul is-”

She shook her head, dropping her sweater on the ground in defeat. “I don’t even care about him,” she said evenly. “I’m so fed up with this place.” The anger on her face was palpable - her cheeks were flushed, and Jacob knew she wasn’t far from shedding her clothes and letting her wolf calm her. 

“I know, but Lee-”

“Don’t but Lee me,” she said fiercely. “This is all your fucking fault.”

Jacob was caught off guard. “My fault? What did I do?”

”You imprinted on that stupid hybrid,” Leah said, her voice trembling. “And then forced me to come back here to this dead-end town. Why couldn’t we just stay over there, happy? Why can’t we go back?”

Ah, the backlash Jacob had been waiting for - the emotions she had ultimately denied last week; repeatedly, despite him knowing better. Jacob crossed his arms over his chest, “Our family is here, Leah. You told me you had no bad feelings-”

”No, my nightmare is here, Jacob. My worst fucking nightmare. It was kind of hard to have any kind of hard feelings when you asked – I was supposed to die in that confrontation, so I was kind of glad to just be alive – plus I was pretty drunk.” 

He knew there was no way in Hell his dad was going to take kindly to him choosing Leah after this - and he really questioned if he wanted to. She was set off so easily - especially by Paul, who she really needed to learn to ignore entirely. Usually she did a much better job, but he knew the upcoming wedding had her even more irritable. He could understand, but it was hardly his fault here. “How do you know what happened in Alice’s vision?”

“I overheard you talking to the Cullen’s after the volturi left.”

Jacob sighed, “Just come back inside and eat, Leah, you know how Paul is-”

”So what? He can continually point out what a miserable person I am, but no one tells him what a jackass he is?”

”Oh trust me, he’s aware,” Jacob said, clearly getting annoyed by her behavior. He had hoped for an easy night - to show his dad that he knew best, but he was only in for yet another argument now. “He doesn’t know the new you, not like me.”

”The new me?” Leah couldn’t help but to laugh. “There is no new me, Jacob. I’m the same old pathetic Leah Clearwater that Sam Uley can’t get away from in order to have his happy ending. So, thanks for dragging me back here, I really appreciate your desire to only care about yourself.” She turned on her heel to leave, and Jacob felt his own anger getting the best of him.

”Only care about myself, huh, is that right? I remember you begging me to let you stay in my pack and although we never seen eye to eye before that, I let you. I could have sent you right back here, but I didn’t.” Honestly, this was the reaction he had expected upon bringing her back, but it was a little delayed.

”Don’t pretend like that was for me,” she called back. “You needed numbers - and my Intel on Sam’s plan.”

Jacob would never win an argument against Leah - mostly because he really didn’t have the energy anymore to try and one-up her broken heart, but he couldn’t back down. “So, I used you at first, okay, fine, but don’t pretend like you didn’t use me, either. You tried to break off on your own and couldn’t, but you followed me to get away from here. You’re not innocent, either.”

Leah shook her head, a wild scowl playing on her lips, rage bubbling in her eyes. “Yeah, fine, maybe I did use you, but I’d do it again. And you know what? Sam and Seth reasoning aside, it turned out to be the right decision, even if I didn’t agree with it when I split.”

Jacob hadn’t been expecting that, and he couldn’t hear any noise coming from inside the house. He could imagine everyone could hear them screaming on the front lawn, the door ajar from when he stumbled out to find Leah, but he didn’t care. His voice lowered to a normal level. “The right decision?”

”Sam was wrong. Renesmee was… innocent. I stood up for him originally because, just like everyone else, I was scared she would come out raging war on all of Seattle. But she didn’t, so it was the right decision protecting her. As much as I still dislike the Cullen’s… I’m glad we helped them. No one else would have.”

Jacob was shocked by her response; he hadn’t thought she cared much more about the Cullen’s than their ability to give her an out of La-Push, but he was wrong; he knew Leah was much deeper than she appeared, but he hadn’t realized how level-headed she could be; pragmatic. He hoped this, if not anything else from tonight, proved to his dad that she would be an acceptable second-in-command. “Your empathy and regard for others has rendered me speechless, Clearwater.” He was only teasing her, but he knew she was still heated - he could feel the tension in the air.

She rolled her eyes, “Whatever, Jake. I’m not a monster, you know. And neither is anyone who went against you when you went to protect the Cullen’s. They were trying to protect us and everyone else, you just got lucky that it worked out in your favor.”

”I’m aware,” he said levelly. “But you want to know something, Leah? Sam isn’t a monster, either.”

”I didn’t say he was,” she snapped back.

”You treat him like he is. We’re back here, that’s indisputable and you can be mad at me for it all you want, but Sam did nothing to intentionally hurt you.”

Leah shook her head, not getting into this, especially when Sam’s mom was inside. “Are we going back to trading stories about our love-lives, Jake? Is that what you want? I remember neither of us liked each other much back on the cliff when I tried to get you over Bella.”

Jacob sighed, “No, I’m telling you that you need to forgive him. Actually forgive him.”

“I have,” she said, crossing her arms in front of her chest like a child. 

“That’s why you can’t stand to be in the same village as him, right?”

“I don’t want to be around him, forgiven or not, and I don’t want to have this conversation with you right now, or ever.”

Jacob sighed, “Will you come back inside?”

”No, I’m done with this dinner party. I’m done putting myself through anymore unnecessary bullshit. I’ve got enough on my plate right now; I’m not going to stick around at take Paul’s crap all night. If it was my way, I’d be long gone out of this town, but once again, I’m stuck here because of a stupid imprint. If you hadn’t imprinted on her, we would be gone. I was so close to getting away from this town.”

She turned on her heel and walked away and Jacob let her. He hated being her punching bag for dragging her back to La Push. He knew it would cause tension between them - she firmly believed they could break off on their own after everything was done with the Cullen’s, but then… well, he imprinted and that didn’t happen. He understood her anger toward him, but it wasn’t exactly his fault - something he asked for. Maybe now that their true feelings were out in the open, they could get passed it, but Hell knew no fury like Leah Clearwater.

”Let’s go back inside, let her cool off,” Rachel said softly to her brother, stepping out onto the porch. Jacob turned and followed her back into the house, at the quiet table, and sat down.

”Did you really intend to leave with her?” Seth asked, grasping Jacob’s attention. It took him a second to realize Seth was speaking to him.

”What?”

”I know she wanted to break off with you… Leave. Did you really intend to do it, or was it just to shut her up?” Seth’s concern for his sister always won out. He wasn’t a kid anymore, and he could see the toll Leah’s misfortune had on the prior fun-loving sister he always knew and loved. It was like he barely knew her anymore. 

”I don’t know, Seth, I never gave her an answer.”

”Let’s eat,” Billy said, trying to get Sue’s attention back onto the evening at hand. He could see by the lines on her face the toll that Leah was taking on her mother. “She’ll be okay,” Billy said softly to Sue. 

Sue gave him a small smile, but it was forced.

”I’m sorry,” Paul said honestly to Sue. Regardless of his and Leah’s relationship, he, too, saw the stress Sue was under and it wasn’t fair of him to add to it. Sue was a very sweet woman. “Leah and I… we butt heads all of the time. She usually just gives it back or ignores me. I… I didn’t mean to cause a scene.”

”I think that’s exactly what you wanted to do,” Seth said boldly. He was usually quiet, but he was sick of his sister being pushed around. It was time for him to be the real man of the house and protect her - show the guys that he wasn’t a kid anymore. 

“Because she doesn’t try to do the same, Seth?”

“She hasn’t been,” Jacob cut-in. “She’s actually been very pleasant to be around before coming back. Maybe if you gave her the benefit of the doubt instead of pushing her buttons, you’d see it, too. I actually told her she was more pleasant than you,” he teased, trying to ease the tension between Seth and Paul. 

Paul chuckled, “I’ll believe it when I see it. She’s still panting after Sam - no pun intended. Until she gets over him, she will never be happy. Jake, you know as well as I do how intolerable it is to be around her. Sue, I’m sorry but-”

”My daughter,” Sue said finally. “Has been through a lot, Paul-”

”I know, but Sue… She’s never let anyone help her. She takes it out on all of us, and she never let anyone in from day one to even try to help. She’s kind of dug her own grave.”

”Well, help her get out of it,” Billy said finally. “Be the pack she needs you to be - ignore her when she’s being unpleasant and rise up and be the man that is going to marry my daughter, Paul. I’m serious. Put your beef with Leah to bed and try to be a supporting pack member for her. As a part of this family, we don’t leave anyone behind and Leah has grown up with my three kids.”

Sue thanked Billy, and Paul nodded, realizing he was out of bounds. Billy may not have gotten the night he wanted - the reaction he wanted from Leah, but maybe this was more telling of her suitability as Beta. 

“I’m sorry,” Sam’s mom said softly. “I mean… for everything. I wanted him and Leah to work as much as you did,” she told Sue. “Honestly. Before Emily… they were a match made in Heaven. It killed Sam to… I know how it feels, to be left, how she must be feeling…”

Sue put a hand on Allison’s arm and gave her a convincing smile. “It was out of all of our control.”

The rest of the night went smoothly, and when everyone was getting ready to leave, Jacob took a deep breath in. “I’m going to head out for a bit - see if the guys need any help patrolling.”

Billy looked at his son as everyone was getting their jackets on. “Help patrolling or to check on Leah?”

”Both,” he admitted honestly. “Why?”

”How close did you both get during your time away, Jake?”

”What is that supposed to mean?”

”The way you defend her-”

”Is like how any friend would. She’s been kicked around enough; she needs a friend. We have a mutual understanding .”

Billy nodded, but he had a strange feeling that his son’s pick for Beta may not only have to do with tradition and gut-instinct, but also some deeper feeling Jacob hadn’t discovered yet; an admiration, if not just for her strength but also the courage and the challenge she posed. Leah intrigued him.

Jacob left, too and found the she wolf at her usual spot in the woods. She had just slipped off her sweater, placing it in the box at the base of the tree, getting ready to go join Embry and Quil to patrol. She took some time earlier to calm down and collect her thoughts, first. “Leah?”

”Jake?” Leah turned to face him; brow furrowed. “If you’re here to tell me to get over Sam some more, I’m really sick of-”

He shook his head, cutting her off. ”My dad said something tonight after you left - to Paul, and I couldn’t stop thinking about it.”

”Okay, that has anything to do with me… how?”

”Listen, never mind, forget it, but I just wanted to come and tell you that I was serious.”

”You’re losing me Jacob. Once your brain starts functioning again, we can have this conversation but right now,” she gestured down to the box she placed at the bottom of the tree before they broke the packs apart. It was a lot harder for a female wolf to tie her clothing to her leg - so she placed it all into a box when the phasing was planned. Leah naked didn’t faze him - especially having been in a pack together. It didn’t happen often, but when he did catch a glance, he couldn’t help but to notice. She was kind of hot without the scowl. 

”Forget about patrolling right now, Quil and Embry got it covered. It’s quiet. I checked in with them before I came to find you. I need to talk to you.”

”I don’t want to talk, I’m sick of talking in circles, can you just let me phase in peace?”

”I was thinking about letting you come with me - if I broke off.”

”Oh, well, thanks Jake,” she said sarcastically. “I appreciate the thought, really. Good thing you didn’t have to make that decision - since it was made for you.”

”My imprint isn’t something I can change, Leah, I’m sorry if that makes you hate me, but it is what it is. I can’t run across the globe with you at our leisure when Renesmee needs me.”

”You mean needs a babysitter,” she scoffed.

Jacob was getting so frustrated with her attitude! “What do you want from me, Leah? An apology? What do you want me to say to mend this bridge?”

”I don’t want you to say anything,” she said honestly. “But I’m allowed to be disappointed, okay?” Leah had learned disappointment was the worst feeling in the entire world, and here she was, smothered in it again based on how she hoped things would have turned out. 

“I’m lost,” Jacob said finally, wishing he could throw his hands up in the air. Women were so damn complicated!

Leah sighed, feeling the weight of the world laying on her shoulders. “I’m just pissed off, okay? I really didn’t think I’d have to come back here.”

”You were betting on Bella dying and me killing the baby.” It wasn’t a question, but a statement.

Her hope hadn’t been unfounded. If he hadn’t of imprinted, maybe things would have been different right now, but of course Leah was just hoping for whichever scenario allowed her to escape La Push for good.

”I was kind of betting on that more than you imprinting on it, yeah.”

”I’m sorry it didn’t follow your plan,” he said halfheartedly. 

”It doesn’t matter.”

”Of course it matters!” This time, he did throw his hands up in the air. “You matter, Leah. You matter to Seth and your mom and me and Emily and Sam and the pack, whether you want to admit it or not.”

Leah rolled her eyes, “I definitely matter to Emily and Sam and the pack, yeah, whatever Jake. Why are you even here?”

”You’ve pushed Sam so far away that you don’t see the look on his face when you’re cold to him – I’m keeping you off patrol with him and Paul for now, until after the wedding, so you don’t hear his worry for you with the wedding coming up or have to deal with it any more than you already have to. You never accepted his regret over what happened between you two-”

”Are you an expert on our relationship, because last time I checked, Jacob, our relationship was just that - a relationship, which was only between two people. You all think you have Sam and I figured out, but none of you experienced what we had - not really. Wolf telepathy aside, you have no idea what really happened, so stop pretending like you do.” Leah’s anger had quite obviously diminished to sadness and Jacob wasn’t sure what he expected out of this conversation, but it sure as Hell wasn’t Leah’s softer side emerging. 

”No, you’re right, we don’t know, but Leah, he’s with Emily now. You have to move on.”

”It’s kind of hard when I’m imprisoned in this town, seeing him living his perfect life everyday with my ex-best friend don’t you think?”

”Do you still love him? Really, after all this time? After everything you’ve been through?”

The question was a loaded one. Jacob realized it, and the pain on Leah’s face was evident. He wouldn’t be surprised if she tried to hit him, or yelled at him, or screamed. But, in true, surprising Leah-fashion, she simply slumped down to sit at the base of the tree and sighed. “I think I will always love him. I don’t know how not to.”

Jacob frowned, feeling the heaviness of her words, and he was glad that he wasn’t the one experiencing whatever was going on behind her dark eyes. He walked over and sat beside her, back against the tree, peering over at her as she looked forward, refusing to meet his eyes. He remembered the feeling that Bella was it for him, and oddly enough, he understood how it felt to be second-best. He knew Bella loved him, but her love for him didn’t compare for her love for Edward. Leah was in a similar situation. “Don’t let him have that power over you.”

”I don’t give it to him willingly,” she said finally, her voice wavering. Jacob saw the rawness of Leah in that moment, and knew he had every duty to put her back on her two feet - especially after giving her false hope of an out. It may not have been his fault that it didn’t work out for her, but he could feel how much she was hurting in that moment and remembered how when it was him hurting over Bella, the pack rallied behind him. No one had done that for Leah. They were a family, after all, as his father had said earlier. Family helped family, even if she had only taunted him when it was him in the situation. Maybe he was just too soft and hated to see a woman upset.

”Sam has nothing more than you give him,” Jacob said as she turned to meet his eyes. 

”Sam has the best of me.”

”Well take it back.”


	3. Uley Wedding

Leah couldn’t believe it was finally time to go to the church. Getting up and ready, she curled her shoulder-length hair into loose waves and did some basic make-up to even out her complexion and make her eyes pop with some mascara. It was a strange feeling to put on make-up after letting her appearance go. It wasn’t practical when you turned into a large dog daily to paint your nails and put on lipstick. When she was with Sam, she used to wear make-up all the time - just enough to make her natural features glow, but ever since the break-up she hadn’t really put much thought into her appearance. Plus, she had to cut off all her long, black hair when she started phasing. Although she had been ready for a change at the time, she did miss her long locks. Now, as she scrutinized herself in the mirror, she barely recognized the girl looking back at her.

Getting up from in front of the small vanity that was barely anymore, Leah looked in the full-length mirror. The dress she wore was floor-length and a burgundy in color. The neckline was just low enough to accentuate her chest, but not low enough to feel too showy for the formality of a wedding. The dress had thick shoulder straps and the girls all had faux animal-skinned shawls to stay warm. For a wolf who was supposed to have a naturally heightened body temperature, she felt the shuddering cold inside of her at the thought of today. 

Leah licked her lips before putting on a neutral-colored lip stick that she had found in her old make-up bag. She was grateful that Emily hadn’t asked her to get ready with them so she could at least have some solace before watching their perfect day unravel before her. The day she had pictured for her and Sam for years. 

“Leah?” She heard her mom call up the stairs. “Sweetheart? It’s time to go.”

One last look in the mirror and Leah determined that minus the frown on her face, she looked something like her old self; pretty, presentable, and attractive; but with shorter hair and aged by her own misery. Leah walked downstairs to meet Seth who was dressed in a suit and tie, her mom dressed in a pair of dress pants and a nice long-sleeved blouse, and Charlie who mirrored Seth’s formal attire. 

Sue gave her daughter a comforting smile before they all piled into the car. It only took a couple of minutes to get to the church that Sam and Emily were getting married in, just outside the La Push boarder. Once they arrived, Leah followed Sue into one of the back rooms where Emily and the other girls were finishing getting ready. When they walked in, Emily was just getting zipped into her dress and Leah felt her heart sink. 

Emily looked beautiful. It was only a simple dress; nothing too big or Cinderella-styled, but it was perfect. The dress was pure white, form-fitting, and it had a beautiful corset top. The dress accentuated her cousin’s rounded hips and there was lace adorning her chest. The fabric hung from her waist, straight down to her feet and complimented her petite figure. Leah even felt emotional looking at Emily. Leah barely noticed the scars on her face, which were extensively covered with make-up, but with the glow she was emanating, make-up or not, Leah doubted anyone would look twice at her scars today.

“Leah!” Emily said happily; no doubt glad to see her cousin hadn’t bailed. “I’m so glad you’re here, you look great.” 

It still hurt her to have said goodbye to not only Sam, but Emily, too; however, she couldn’t pretend that it didn’t still bother her to see them together, even if Emily continually tried to make amends. Why her heart couldn’t seem to beat Sam out of its natural rhythm, even after all this time, annoyed her to no end. She was reminded of last week when Jacob told her to take back Sam’s power over her - if only it was that easy.

“You’re beautiful,” Leah managed to choke out before Emily engulfed her into a hug. Pushing Sam out of her mind, it was easy to imagine this was their childhood fantasy of standing with one another dressed in white. Emily was a beautiful bride. If she wasn’t still pining after the groom, today would have been much different.

“I have something for you,” Emily turned before her sister could put her veil in and grabbed a small box. “Can we have the room for just a second?” The room vacated and it was only the two cousins.

“You didn’t have to get me anything,” Leah protested before Emily put the small red box in her hands.

“Just open it.”

Leah opened it and pulled out a small, glass figurine of two wolves that looked hand-made. “Emily…” It was beautiful. She held it up to the light that was coming in from the half-opened blinds and watched the glass glisten and throw rainbows over the walls. “It’s perfect.”

“I thought it could be you and Sam,” she said softly. “I mean… I know you guys aren’t close anymore, but we both want you to know that we want you in our lives as much as it is tolerable for you. I know it’s not easy and I know today is going to be difficult for you, but we both love you; I know Sam will always have a place for you in his heart and you’ll always be my best friend no matter what. I’m very grateful for you doing this for me today.”

Leah felt a lump rise in her throat and her eyes grew damp. She wished so badly they could go back to those teenagers who talked on the phone every day and were excited to make the hour-long drive for family visits. Emily had known everything about her at one point and after Sam imprinted and Leah phased, Emily had given Leah the space she had needed, but too much had happened and she wasn’t convinced that any number of apologies would mend the damage that was already done. She hugged Emily tightly in response - This was Emily’s day and Leah had to try and let her own feelings be pushed aside for now. “Thank you,” she said as the girls pulled back. “It means a lot. I miss you both.” 

There was a knock on the door, and the girls looked toward it. “Come in.”

Jacob pushed his head in the door. He seemed a little taken back as he took in the sight of the two ladies and he cleared his throat, his eyes lingering a little too long on Leah, causing her to wonder if she had something on her dress already or if he expected her to show up at all. “You both look beautiful.”

Emily smiled sweetly. “Thank-you, Jacob.”

Leah felt a little uncomfortable; she hadn’t been called beautiful in a long time. She sacrificed her beauty after Sam left her and she became the callous and unpleasant ex-girlfriend. Heartbreak changed people and it was easier to be a bitch than it was the pitiful sob-story. She could handle their resentment, but not their pity.

Jacob was dressed in a suit and was also a member of the wedding party. He had a small bag in his hands, and he shut the door behind him. He outstretched the package to Emily. “This is from Sam,” Jacob paused and looked to the she wolf. “Is it possible to steal Leah away for a few minutes?”

Leah’s brow furrowed, but Emily nodded, and the two wolves left the room as the rest of the girls piled back in. “What’s up?” Leah asked as they walked outside from the fire exit door at the end of the hall. They hadn’t spoken since the week before when she had an awkward and unexpectedly vulnerable moment with him on the forests floor. 

“Just checking in; I wanted to make sure you didn’t have some elaborate plan to burn the church down before the ceremony,” he teased, trying to keep the mood light.

Leah shrugged. “I thought about it, but I decided to be on my best behavior so I can enjoy the bar later. That, and pyromaniac-tendencies could seriously end up resulting in me being committed to some insane asylum, and despite my rationale that that could possibly be in my favor at this point, I really do like cheeseburgers and my own bed.”

Jacob smirked, “You’ve really thought about this, haven’t you?”

Leah nodded, hands on her hips. “I wanted to really explore all of my options before showing up so I would have a plan.”

“And you settled on being on your best behavior? That doesn’t exactly sound like the Leah I know. Kind of boring, if you ask me.” 

“What do you want, Jacob?” She asked finally.

Jacob leaned against the brick structure of the church, “I just wanted to let you know the pack and I are here for you if you need anything.”

“Do everyone expect me to make some horrific scene in there or what?” She said, only half-joking, wanting to try and resume the lighter mood between them. Today would be hostile enough without trying to hash out her and Jacob’s issues again and again.

“Well I guess considering the guys did have to physically remove me from Edward and Bella’s wedding, it only seems inevitable they’ll have to subdue you, too. Like Alpha, like Beta, right?” Jacob was trying to make light on his own misfortune to help alleviate some of her tension, but it didn’t seem to be working. He was only trying to look out for her; he knew despite Leah’s harsh words and impenetrable demeanor, today would be difficult for her. 

The man inside Jacob wanted to protect his pack and keep them united, even though the wolf was focused on the fact that he could be using this time to spend with Renesmee who was inside with her parents. He always walked a thin line when it came to his packs needs and his imprint’s. His own needs seemed to come dead last.

“Who even knows what we are anymore,” she said dully.

“What are you talking about?” Leah was always some complex puzzle and he never really knew what she was going to say, but he was hoping him checking-in this morning wouldn’t cause another argument between them. She had seemed to open-up a little the last time they spoke, but Leah was anything but predictable. 

“Alpha and Beta,” she clarified, thinking about the words for a moment before sighing. “We’re back with Sam’s pack now, Jacob, that’s pretty obvious. We’re all still waiting to see what you’re going to do about having two Alphas’ around.”

He knew he hadn’t been too forthcoming since the volturi confrontation, but he had been struggling after the dinner at his place to decide if he was making the right decision by taking a risk on Leah as Beta. Her strength knew no bounds, but her attitude frequently prevailed; but still, he knew she was his best option. Everyone was getting together tomorrow morning at the Clearwater’s to discuss things – thanks to Seth for volunteering their house.

“We’ve got it figured out, Sam is stepping back,” he said, wanting to gain some of her trust back.

“What?” Leah was clearly surprised at his words. Sam? Sam was going to pull back his heels and step down? “You do realize he’s not going to be happy as second-best, right?”

“He knows it’s time for him to step back, he knows that if we continue to be two packs there will be more numbers crossing over to my side, and now there really is no need for the separation. He is confident that I will be able to handle the pack and he will still be around in case I need his support – which I won’t,” he said cockily. “I think I’ve got this Alpha thing down, at least enough to be able to get into the swing of things pretty quickly. If I can handle you, I think I can handle Paul,” he teased. He masked the true reason of the old Alpha stepping down in order to spare her anymore pain today.

“I still can’t see Sam taking orders from anyone,” Leah said, an amused half-smile crossing her lips at the thought of him bowing down to another wolf. “And I think Paul is much more hard-headed than I am.”

“Oh, finally, she smiles,” Jacob mused. 

Leah rolled her eyes, but considered once again Sam stepping down – there had to be more to it, didn’t there? After all this time butting heads with Jacob and now he throws it away? Did Emily have something to do with it, or was he just sick of being in charge? The latter didn’t sound like the Sam she knew, but then again, the Sam she knew wouldn’t have wanted to oversee anyone in the first place, let alone a group of wolves in constant life or death situations. 

Maybe it would be a little more bearable being around him if she knew he couldn’t tell her what to do anymore -- not that he forced her to do much in the first place. Sam always tried to be as pragmatic with her as possible due to their already strained relationship, but it was always the thought that he out-ranked her that got under her skin. Admittedly, however, the only time she really remembered feeling inadequate to him was during the newborn army attack when she had tried to subdue the vampire by herself and Jacob ended up paying the price. Sam had snapped at her – probably rightly so, Jacob had saved her ass, but it still made her sour. She wondered some nights when she couldn’t sleep if it had been her hurt if he would have stayed with her when Carlisle re-broke her bones like he had with Jacob, or if he would have settled with delegating that job to Seth.

“Well, at least I can stomach getting told what to do by you, just don’t let Sam get too caught up in being Beta or—“

“What? Sam isn’t my Beta.” 

Leah raised a brow as they heard some commotion start inside. It just made sense for Sam to step back, but still stay somewhat in charge. “Then who, Quil?”

“You.”

If hearing Sam was stepping down didn’t shock the older Clearwater, she was now indubitably floored. “Me?”

Jacob nodded, a smile playing on his lips. “You were a good Beta, you took my orders - even when you didn’t necessarily like them, you didn’t annoy me and you gave me my space when I needed it, but you stood up for the pack, too. You’re a good Beta, Leah. We’re proven to work well together and I’m going to need your hard-ass attitude to make sure the guys stay in line – especially Paul. Plus, with your relationship with Seth I thought maybe you could guide him to being able to teach the younger pack members how things are done. With the newfound peace, I’m probably going to be assisting Paul and maybe some of the others on how to stop phasing, so I’ll need the support with the younger wolves.” 

Jacob had a good relationship with the younger Clearwater, too, however he was going to have bigger responsibilities now and Leah as his Beta was essentially responsible for helping him make level-headed decisions. Him and Leah worked – it made sense not to veer away from their partnership. Admittedly, seeing her last week, vulnerable and fierce, gave him hope that maybe she could use being Beta to further her healing – and she also wasn’t going to be able to stop phasing anytime soon by her outbreak at dinner, so he had no worries there, at least for a while. He just hoped he didn’t have to mediate often between her, Paul, and Sam.

Leah was slightly humbled and the antics of the day to come were pushed from her mind. “Uh, thanks.” She and Jacob had never really been warm and fluffy with one another, despite their similarities and understandings. Though, realistically, she would have probably bowed at Jacob’s feet if it meant he let her stay in his pack when she left Sam. Thankfully, he had been an easier target than she had hoped – allowing her to have avoided degrading what was left of her reputation. 

“If you want to, that is,” Jacob said. “I was going to pull you aside tomorrow before the meeting to make sure you felt comfortable with it before I told everyone - but since we’re here now.”

Leah nodded, “I’ll do it.” It gave her some responsibility and she was hoping that would take her mind off other things and give her something productive to do. Despite desperately wanting to separate from the pack and finally claim her life back, she knew there was no way she was about to get her phasing in check anytime soon, so for now, this worked, and she could continue to try and get her phasing under control in the meantime.

“C’mon,” Jacob smirked seeing the wheels moving inside her head. “Let’s get back inside before they throw a search-party.”

“Or think I planted dynamite under the church,” Leah mused to his comment earlier, making Jacob grin in response. Maybe the two packs merging wouldn’t be as bad as Leah had initially thought. Likewise, she was still surprised at his words; she was never chosen first. In retrospect, maybe he just felt bad or sorry for her, but that was a thought for another time.

The two made their way back to their respected rooms and Leah found Emily looking at herself in the mirror, veil in her hair, giving her the ultimate bridal-look. Continually trying to make herself believe this was the anticipated childhood wedding of Emily’s and that Sam wouldn’t be at the other end of the aisle, she tried to be happy for her cousin. 

“Hard day?” Rachel whispered to Leah as she came back in the room.

Leah gave her the most convincing smile she could, “I’m fine.”

Rachel reached down and squeezed Leah’s hand before they were all called to the main church area. Leah was paired with Jacob, Rachel with Paul, and Kim with Jared. Emily’s sister went with Embry, as they all knew it was highly likely Embry was Sam’s blood brother. It was Sam’s way of accepting his father’s wrongdoings and extending an olive branch to the younger pack member.

Emily stayed back in the room, but the rest of them accumulated in the foyer with the main doors to the chapel closed. “Everyone pair up,” the coordinator said softly as the music started. Leah and Jacob were the third to go, so Leah found him in the small, crowded area and Jacob extended his arm to her to loop hers through. It felt odd to be so close, physically, to Jacob as they stood in the foyer, arms looped.

It wasn’t that he was unattractive, but he was well… Jacob; the boy she played with in the sandbox and convinced to eat a slug when they were kids. Then, there was that weird time he was dared by Rachel to kiss Leah on the cheek – which they had both thought was absolutely disgusting at the time. Plus, he was kind of her favorite person to butt heads with and tease, not necessarily hold hands with.

Sam walked down first, by himself, as the music started, and the doors parted. Leah tried to avoid watching Sam to continue with her delusion that this wasn’t happening, but the way his suit fit around his broad shoulders gave her chills. She felt her breathing catch as Kim and Jared started walking down, music playing loudly and everyone watched the processional, waiting for the big moment that the bride came. Paul and Rachel were next, and then it was their turn.

“Just smile,” Jacob whispered reassuringly. He saw Renesmee at the end of one of the aisle’s, beside the rest of the Cullen’s and felt his smile widen immediately. Anytime he could get to spend with his imprint, whether they were playing dolls or just watching some kids’ show was amazing. The Cullen’s were being supportive and pragmatic by coming to the ceremony, but had opted not to attend the reception, so it was likely he wouldn’t get much time with Renesmee today, but there was always tomorrow.

It was their turn next and Leah felt like running. Suddenly, her muscles didn’t want to move, and Jacob pulled on her arm as he started to walk, making her remember that this wasn’t optional anymore. She gulped and avoided looking around, especially up to Sam’s gaze. It was supposed to be her walking down last, dressed in white, with her dad on her arm. 

Jacob could sense the she wolf’s sudden paralysis and hoped she could at least get through the ceremony. He knew Leah was strong, that was never a question, but how strong could one be in her situation? He guessed he was about to see the depths and bounds of Leah Clearwater and they would all either witness the beauty in her strength or the heartbreak in her weakness. He hoped she proved strong and resilient for her own sake; Paul would jump on any sign of weakness from her to return the favor of her always giving him a hard time and today was not the day. He wasn’t dressed to mitigate a fight and knew Emily wouldn’t be too happy with them if they ripped their suits. Hopefully his dad’s words last week had resonated with Paul so that he and Leah were able to get along moving forward.

The she wolf’s chest expanded with a deep breath as she tried not to trip, and they made it to the front of the aisle before parting on either side. She avoided Sam’s eyes the entire time, and watched Emily’s sister, Grace, and Embry come down together before the doors momentarily closed and the music shifted to the traditional ‘Here Comes the Bride.’

Leah gulped, feeling the weight of the world on her shoulders and many eyes on her before the doors opened and they all shifted to Emily. Instead of looking at her cousin, though, she made the mistake of watching Sam’s face as Emily walked in and it felt like her chest was being crushed. The way he watched her is the way she imagined this day for them so many times. His eyes were beaming and the love in them was palpable. Leah gulped, feeling tears rushing to her eyes and wondering if this day would be even more romantically painful than their actual break-up. She didn’t think it would be possible to ever forget that moment, let alone have it replaced with one that was worse.

Everyone cries at weddings, she thought idly - but usually not because they’re in love with the groom. 

Leah dropped her eyes as Emily’s dad gave her away because it was just another painful reminder on how much had changed and what she would never have.

Sam and Emily took hands and the officiant started speaking. “We’re all here today to join Sam Uley and Emily Young in holy matrimony.”

Leah felt like a deer in the headlights - and a little nauseous, too. She didn’t hear many of the other words as she focused on a bow on the second pew that was starting to unravel. Slowly, the satin fabric was loosening and only a second later the bow fell to the floor. Another small detail caught her attention, suddenly, as she tried to tone out the tribe elder officiating the ceremony: Renesmee. The small child was beside her parents, the Cullen’s on one side, and Charlie, Seth, and Sue on the other. She wasn’t aware they would be here, but she also wasn’t entirely surprised. 

The half-breed had to be wherever Jacob was, she thought bitterly.

Since of the elder’s was completing the ceremony, there were a few religious aspects of a traditional wedding ceremony replaced by tribal traditions and phrases. The next thing Leah heard was the vows and it felt like she had been standing there forever.

“I, Emily Young, take you, Sam Uley, to be my lawfully wedded husband. I promise to love you in sickness and in health, I promise to never forsake you and love you every day of our forever. I promise to always make your favorite muffins, to always be faithful, and to never give up even when things may get hard. I love you.”

Leah felt a fresh wave of tears wanting to spill over, but she knew Sam’s vows would be harder to hear.

“I, Sam Uley, take you,”

He was supposed to say her name. Not Emily’s. It sickened her that she couldn’t be completely happy for her cousin – she was still pining after a soon-to-be married man who would technically be her cousin-in-law. She heard Emily’s sister before her sniff and saw her wipe away the dampness on her cheeks. She felt her breath catch, but she wouldn’t let any tears spill. She was stronger than that

“-- Emily Young, to be my lawfully wedded wife. In sickness and in health, for better or worse, even when you snore in your sleep,” there was some laughter from the guests. “I promise to always protect you, and love you, and make sure you always feel beautiful. I love you.”

Leah’s eyes were welled with tears, but she blinked them back. Even just his voice affected her. She gulped back, trying to get rid of the growing lump in her throat and wishing the ache in her chest that seemed to be a permanent part of today would subside. He used to make her feel beautiful.

Jacob watched the older wolf from across the aisle and although someone who wasn’t familiar with her may not see it, he did catch the faint glisten in her eyes and saw what he had felt at Bella’s wedding only months before. He wasn’t entirely sure why exactly she had agreed to do this, not when it was clear today would cause her pain. He couldn’t help but notice, however, her tall stature with her high heels on and the way her dress hung to her hips. They seemed to have forgotten in the scheme of things that although Leah was one of them, she was a woman – and she was beautiful despite her scars. He averted his gaze to the small girl in the audience and smiled as she caught his gaze. Her fun-loving and carefree spirit made his lighter and he was thankful he was no longer plagued by the heartbreak that his favorite female wolf currently was.

“Emily Young, do you take this man as your husband?”

“I do,” she said sweetly, her own face damp with tears after Sam’s vows.

“And Sam Uley, do you take this woman as your wife?”

“I do.” Jacob couldn’t entirely see Sam’s face, but he could tell by the hitch in his voice that his eyes were damp, too.

The words wrung out in the entire church and Leah felt like she had been punched in the stomach. It seemed like a very cruel punishment but had only herself to blame. She may have agreed to this, but in hindsight, she didn’t think it would hurt quite this much. 

“If anyone here today has any reason why these two people should not become husband and wife, please speak now or forever hold your peace.”

Leah felt eyes fall on her; it was impossible for them to think she would actually ruin their wedding, right? Even though she had a list of reasons why Sam should be marrying her instead. She even felt her mom and Seth’s eyes on her. Being in love with the groom didn’t warrant much merit, especially when imprinting was involved, so she kept her mouth shut.

“Well, I now pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Sam Uley! You may now kiss your bride.”

Leah looked away, everyone’s eyes back to the happy couple and she felt a tear slip down her cheek. Everyone cheered and clapped as the two made their vows official and only moments later, the music came back on and the recessional started. Leah met Jacob in the center, and they followed down the aisle behind the newlyweds and the others. Jacob smiled and squeezed her arm. “You did great,” he said softly as they exited. It still felt a little weird to be sympathy toward Leah – who continually decided to show her lack of empathy to everyone, but he knew how today felt – to be in love with the bride, or in Leah’s case, the groom. Even with only his short encounters and time with Bella, the wedding killed him, but Leah was there, shoulder’s high, eyes (almost) entirely dry. And no one had to subdue her. Her strength amazed him sometimes. If nothing else, Leah was a challenge to him. Operation get Leah over Sam was in full swing. It was time she, too, found her own happy ending and let them have theirs. Maybe something could actually happen between Leah and the guy Rachel kept hounding her about meeting.

She ignored Jacob’s words as they got outside, stepping aside so as the guests came out, they could congratulate the happy couple. 

Jacob stayed by Leah’s side until Renesmee came out and he scooped her up. She wrapped her arms around Jacob’s neck, and he held her as the other guests left. “Jake!” the small girl said happily. “I love weddings. They’re so happy.”

”They are pretty great, huh?” Jacob smiled adoringly at her. Even with only a week having passed, she was already bigger. It amazed him how quickly she had begun to mature.

”Like ours will be someday, right?”

Jacob chuckled, “Like I said, we will talk about it when we get there, ‘kay, Ness?”

He hadn’t even noticed that Leah had disappeared until the guests finished exiting and Emily asked where she was to move on to the pictures. He was too enraptured with the small child.

Leah had managed to slip away back inside to the bathroom. She locked the door and splashed some cold water on her face. She dried her face and took some deep breaths in before idly fixing her make-up. She had to hold it together.

She stayed inside the small bathroom until she couldn’t hear anymore voices coming from the other side of the door and she assumed everyone went to the beach for pictures. Although she agreed to be a part of Emily’s day, she had a hunch the newly wedded bride didn’t need pictures involving her husband’s ex-girlfriend to remind her of how screwed up her day really was, so Leah decided to skip it. They wouldn’t miss her. 

When everyone arrived at the beach, Jacob scanned the rocky area for her. He knew Seth was worried because he stood beside him, fists clenched as the girls all congregated to get pictures. Jacob saw Emily’s eyes scanning over the pack around, looking for her, too, but she wasn’t there. 

Knowing his own heartache sent him halfway across Canada, Jacob was worried for his pack mate. 

“Do you think she’s okay?” Seth asked, his brow’s furrowed, worry evident on his face.

Jacob nodded, trying to reassure him. “Your sister is the strongest girl I know – but don’t tell her I said that, or she’ll hold it over me forever,” he ruffled Seth’s hair playfully. He was like a younger brother to him. 

Seth gave him a halfhearted smile and sighed. “I wish she could find someone and be happy.”

Jacob nodded, “She will, someday.” 

Seth looked up to Jacob, literally and figuratively, and he hesitated before confiding in him. “Jake? Since we came back, she’s been having nightmares. I’m really worried about her. I know you care about her; you guys get along really well now. I don’t know what to do for her.”

Jacob only saw the side of Leah that she allowed him to. He suspected what Seth just confirmed: there were plenty of layers and he probably only saw the exterior. He sighed, his heart really hurting for the she wolf. “I’m not sure what to tell you, Seth,” he said, thinking back to their conversation in the woods the week prior. “She’s still hurting over Sam. I remember how it was with Bella and it sucked. She’s going to have to come to terms with it on her own, all you can do is be there for her.”

Seth nodded, wishing Jacob had some type of cure to give him to help his sister. “We used to watch old movies together and play board games and tease each other. Since dad died and everything changed… she’s like a stranger to me. I know she went through a lot and she still blames herself for dad, but I just wish things were different.”

”You’re a good brother, Seth. Maybe if you talk to her about how you feel it will help?”

”I guess. I just don’t want to put my feelings on top of everything she’s dealing with.”

Jacob smiled down at the younger Clearwater - it surprised him how different they were, yet they grew up together. “I think she needs to hear that you care and want to help. Wait a few days when the wedding stuff dies down and talk to her.”

”Thanks Jake,” Seth said finally before Embry beckoned them all over to the others.

They all collaborated around the bride and groom, the full wolf pack, minus Leah. Jacob caught a glimpse of pain in Sam’s eyes when he realized she wasn’t there, but honestly, it was probably for the best. The newlyweds needed some time to have fun. They did some more picture collaborations before Sam and Emily went off further down the beach to get some of just them. The faux-fur shawls kept the girls warm in the cool weather, the wind whistling in and around the cliffs but the rain staying away for now.

”Seth,” Emily’s mom went up and hugged her nephew, who was beside Jacob again with Quil and Embry. It still felt like the packs were somewhat divided, but that was a thought for tomorrow. “Where’s Leah?”

Seth hugged her back before sighing. “Uh, I’m not sure.”

Emily’s mom sighed. “Today must be hard for her. Sue told me the break-up was difficult. Emily doesn’t say much about it, but I know her and Leah are still pretty… fractured.”

“She’s doing good,” Seth lied, hating not telling the truth, but not wanting to rehash this right now. 

“I’m glad, I was so shocked when Emily told me her and Sam were a thing… I mean, we all thought we would be bringing the family together for Leah and Sam’s wedding, so it’s… been strange, honestly. Seeing Emily and Sam together… it makes sense, and I do think they’re good together but it’s strange how it all happened.”

”Sometimes love finds you unexpectedly, I guess,” Jacob chimed in. “Sam and Emily are perfect together; they really love each other.” That was supposed to be the focus of today.

She smiled, “Of course. They make a beautiful couple.” Her husband called out to her to go back to the reception area and she said goodbye before parting ways.

”I wish he at least found someone that wasn’t related to me,” Seth sighed. “I mean, could that be any weirder? Like yeah, he was supposed to marry my sister, but damn imprints.”

”I mean, we all thought they would get married. Even seeing them together in school,” Embry said easily. “They couldn’t keep their hands off each other.”

Seth grimaced, but Quil chuckled. “Yeah, I think you were the only one watching that closely, considering you’re like in love with her.”

”I am not,” he said defensively.

”Maybe you can ask her to dance tonight?” Jacob offered. “Really wow her and make her fall in love with you and then we can end this Leah-Sam-Emily love fest.”

Embry rolled his eyes, “At her ex-boyfriends wedding? That doesn’t exactly seem like the place to build a romantic connection, Jake. Not that she’s interested anyways.”

”To be fair,” Quil said. “We don’t necessarily know if it’s you she doesn’t like, or if it’s just men in generally,” he chuckled.

”Well I’m not attempting to figure that out tonight. It’s not a good time.”

”Fair,” Jacob sighed. “If she even comes tonight.”

”She’s probably just waiting around for the reception to start.”

”Or halfway to Canada,” Quil smirked, hitting Jake’s arm.

”I really wish you guys would get some new material, that joke is getting real old, real fast.”

”You’re the only one who thinks so,” Embry chuckled.

”Well, let’s get back to the reception hall and see if Leah is there or if I need to send a search team out for her,” Jake offered.

”And hey, you never know, Em, bridesmaids and groomsmen hook up all the time,” Quil grinned.

”Guys,” Seth groaned. “That’s my sister.”

”You sister who Embry thinks is very attractive.”

”And you don’t?” Embry asked. “Oh, come on, maybe I’ve always had a thing for her, but I’m far from the only one who has caught a glimpse during phasing.” Of course, Leah would kill him for bringing it up, but she was attractive.

”Guys!” Seth exclaimed again. “Come on!”

”I didn’t say she’s unattractive,” Quil said as they started walking up toward the car, ignoring Seth’s disgust. “I’m just saying a smile wouldn’t kill her. I know, I know, she’s been through a lot, whatever, but it’s hard to find her attractive now when she’s miserable all the time.”

”It doesn’t change her appearance,” Embry countered. “That’s just your imprint talking. Do you think she’s attractive?” 

It took Jacob a second to realize his question was directed toward him and he cleared his throat. “Leah is… a lot of things.”

”Vague answer there, Jake,” Embry rolled his eyes. “Whatever, because you’ve never looked either, right?”

Seth decided to stay quiet knowing his protests wouldn’t stop them but was determined to ditch them as soon as he got to the reception hall. They all piled into the car and Jacob sighed. “Yes, she’s attractive, okay?”

”You still see other women, even with Renesmee?” Quil questioned.

”Don’t you? Our imprints are… kids, Quil. I love Ness, the same way you love Claire: As a brother. Doesn’t mean I don’t look at other women and think they’re attractive.”

Jacob started the rabbit and started driving back. 

Quil shrugged, “Guess I’m just not interested in anything romantic right now.”

”Thinking someone is attractive doesn’t equate romance,” Jake argued. “I think Leah is attractive, yeah, but I’m not going to start buying her flowers and serenading her.”

Seth laughed, “Good, because she would probably kill you.”

Jacob smirked, “I’m just saying physical and emotional desire are two different things and having an imprint who is a child doesn’t exactly fulfill either in a… romantic way. We’re still allowed to look. Hell, you’re still allowed to explore women, Quil. Renesmee will be full grown soon, but Claire? Are you really going to wait-”

”Okay, enough,” Quil sighed. “I get it. But no, I’m not interested in pursuing anything with anyone right now, so drop it.”

Jacob was a little confused at the hostility in Quil’s voice, but he nodded, obliging.

”Well, I’m glad we settled the fact that despite Quil being asexual, you both think my sister is attractive - which is gross,” Seth chimed in.


	4. Reception

Thankfully, it wasn’t too long until everyone started to make their way back toward the reception hall for some grub. After all, it was cold out for those who weren’t wolves and there were only so many picture combinations that could be explored. The best part of the day, surely, had to be the food and alcohol that awaited. 

When they got back to the reception hall, Jacob’s eyes fell on Leah immediately sitting at the unofficial pack table – with three empty cocktail glasses before her. Everyone mingled for a few minutes, waiting for Emily and Sam to arrive - they had decided to get some pictures alone farther down the beach. He went over and leaned on a chair next to her. “I thought you’d be halfway to Canada by now,” he teased, recalling the guy’s joke from earlier.

Leah looked up to him, quirking a brow. “I’m not you.”

“I see that,” he said easily. “But you are nursing those drinks pretty quickly, I’d slow down if I were you, Clearwater.”

”My wolfy-senses are tingling,” she mused. “Which means, unfortunately, that those three drinks didn’t even touch my tolerance for alcohol, so I can assure you I won’t get trashed before the speeches. What happens after that, however, is none of your business.”

Jacob groaned. Same old Leah. Apparently, his olive branch for Beta still hadn’t made her too affectionate towards him. “Can you just accept that someone is trying to help you, for once in your life?”

“I didn’t ask for your help,” Leah reminded him. “You found me this morning, remember?” She knew it wasn’t fair to take her stewing anger out on Jacob. At least not because of the wedding. She had sat in the same spot since they left for pictures and decided that liquid courage couldn’t hurt as she thought of all the ways her life had been irreparably ruined by the Cullen’s venture to Forks. How all their lives had been ruined. If they hadn’t moved back, it would be her having married Sam today and eagerly awaiting the chance to start a family. And she would still be friends with Emily. Life would have been normal; good. 

“And you were much more pleasant this morning,” Jacob replied. He knew he should try to give her a break today, and he tried! He really only wanted to help, but her walls slammed up again and he felt like saying the Hell with it and letting her sulk all by herself.

“Then I watched the guy I love marry my cousin,” Leah said coldly, as though the reasoning behind her foul mood wasn’t obvious. She spun the small cocktail olive around in her half-full drink and focused her eyes on the moving liquid, trying to will Jacob to go away. The guys ignored her more often than not – except when she wanted them to, of course.

“I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you did agree to this, and you had a very good indication of what was going to happen, or were you still hoping he would choose you in the middle of this thing?” Jacob’s sympathy only went so far – she made it impossible to be a friend to her!

Leah looked up to him, glaring. “Wouldn’t that have made a fabulous twist to today? Groom leaves bride-to-be for ex-girlfriend and cousin of said bride.”

“Pretty interesting headline, yes, but very wishful. Nothing that scandalous would ever happen in this town.”

Leah shrugged, “I had to see it for myself, you know? Make sure he said her name and not mine.” She tried to put a sarcastic tone in her voice, but the bitterness of the truth escaped. 

“You’re really messed up, Clearwater,” Jacob turned the chair around and sat beside her, straddling it. “I can imagine you actually dreaming about that, you know.”

She looked over to meet his eyes as a hint of amusement flashed through her dark eyes. “Well, since fate decided for them to be together, I can assume it also decided I can get really drunk tonight and forget that I’m at this stupid thing.”

As soon as she was about to open up to him, it felt like she slammed her walls up even worse than before. He would let her dwell in her own misery for tonight. Jacob kind of even enjoyed her melancholy company. Despite his own imprint, he wasn’t a huge fan of weddings since Bella’s. A waiter came along and Jacob grabbed him to ask for a beer. “Well,” he turned his attention back to the she wolf. “If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em, right?”

“Why aren’t you off with your perfect little imprint?” Leah rolled her eyes. “Is it past her bedtime already?”

Jacob was used to Leah counting Renesmee out, and he tried not to take it too personally, he knew the Cullen’s were in fact the reason they were all in this mess -- Leah more specifically, but it still got under his skin. “The Cullen’s aren’t coming to the reception – if you really wanted to know.”

“Shame,” she said easily, downing the rest of the liquid in her cup. The waiter returned and removed all her empty glasses after setting Jacob’s beer down before him. Leah requested a refill before he left, and Jacob noticed the him check her out as he walked away. She probably wasn’t the first sad girl he saw at a wedding – or tried to hook up with. With the waiter fleeting, Embry came over to take a seat on the other side of Leah. 

“Hey, we missed you at the pictures, Clearwater.”

Leah rolled her eyes, “I’m sure you did.”

”Well, I did,” he said happily. “With no one to complain the whole time, it was kind of boring.”

”Sorry to disappoint,” Leah said dully, wondering where the waiter was with her next drink. He had been much quicker when it was only her here.

Embry sighed, his attempts to lighten her mood futile.“You may have gotten the tough break here, I’ll admit, but how long are you going to be miserable about losing Sam? I do appreciate your situation here, don’t get me wrong, it sucks, but... are you really intent on letting him ruin your life forever?”

Jacob leaned back in his chair and his face softened as he awaited her response. Surely, Embry was about to get punched. Embry kind of expected her to lash out or ignore everything he had said, but what he hadn’t expected was the knowing look behind her eyes as she met his gaze.

“Do you really think I enjoy this?” she asked, gesturing to the entirety that was the wedding of the man of her dreams. “Do you think I want the guys to all hate being around me? I wish more than anything I could go back to being the naive girl who thought she was going to marry her high school sweetheart and have lots of Uley babies,” she said, her temper growing with every word. “But that didn’t happen-“

“No,” Embry intentionally cut her off. “It didn’t, sometimes life sucks, I don’t need the recap - what I’m asking is: are you really going to let Sam ruin the rest of your life?” He liked her, it was so obvious, and if only she could get over Sam, maybe – just maybe, she could move on with someone else and maybe that could be him.

It was the same thing Jacob asked her a week prior and she still didn’t have an answer. “It’s not just Sam,” Leah said sternly. “If I wasn’t this stupid wolf then maybe I could be happy without Sam, but no - all of this because of your precious little Cullen’s.” The last sentence was for Jacob, and he sighed. 

”Maybe if you opened your eyes, you would see that that isn’t true,” Embry offered before getting called away by Jared.

“You know,” Jacob said matter-of-factually, trying to give her a light at the end of her forever-dark tunnel. “Embry really does think you’re hot, even with the whole miserable thing going on, so maybe he could be the one to get you over Sam and make La Push more bearable?”

Leah almost hit him. The look on her face said it all, and he smirked. “Embry? Really, Jacob?”

“Embry’s a great guy!” He defended. “Big heart.”

“Well, considering he is probably Sam’s brother, that’s the first thing wrong with your theory. I can already hear Paul’s jokes about me keeping it in the family.” She rolled her eyes. “Secondly, I’m not having this conversation with you. My love life – or lack thereof is really none of your business.”

Jacob rolled his eyes. “I’m just saying, it’s been over a year and you’re no better off and yeah, it kind of is my business considering we share a mind half of the time, remember?”

Leah shrugged her small shoulders in defeat. She didn’t have the energy to argue with him about her being miserable tonight. “Thanks for that newsflash, I almost forgot all about having to endure your wet dreams about Bella.”

“One time!” He exclaimed. “And considering we’ve all seen the Leah/Sam intimacy fest, you’re not one to talk about uncomfortable sexual experiences.”

“Uncomfortable sexual experiences,” Leah smirked at his words. “Well, Jakey, you need to actually have a sexual experience, first. What are you like one of the two virgins in the pack?”

“Six, actually,” he grumbled. 

“The fourteen year old's don’t count,” she mused.

“Whatever Ms. Experienced, I bet I’ll be having sex before you jump into bed again with anyone – aside from any Sam fantasies you relive when you’re alone.”

“I don’t know, Nessie may not be the putting out type. Besides, if Edward reads that in your mind, you may not live to tell the tale.”

Jacob glared at her immediately, “Okay, we were talking about your love life, not mine, remember?”

“You may as well run off with your pals,” Leah said finally. 

“I think I’d rather your crappy mood than hanging around the other guys right now.”

“Jealous your little half-breed isn’t here to keep you company?”

He sighed, “Would you stop calling her that?”

Just then, the waiter came back with Leah’s refill. He gave her a sweet smile and asked her if she needed anything else, and when he left, Jacob smirked. “The waiter likes you, too.”

Leah hadn’t paid much attention to him, she just wanted what was in the cup to dull the ache in her chest. “Whatever, Jake,” she rolled her eyes. “He just think’s if he gets me drunk enough, he’ll get lucky,” she teased.

”Maybe that would be exactly what you needed to finally move on,” Jacob taunted.

”By jumping into bed with a stranger? I think that would only complicate my life even more. Thanks for trying to be my wing-man but let me handle my own love life.”

Sam and Emily arrived moments later. The two wolves were surrounded by the other pack members again, taking their seats beside them, imprints included. Rachel sat beside Leah and gave her a small smile before reaching under the table and squeezing her hand. She felt comfortable with her and the waiters started to serve dinner as the speeches started. Leah hadn’t realized how hungry she was until they put chicken, vegetables, a dinner role, and a potato in front of her.

“Emily,” Grace got up, her eyes already watery and voice weak as she stood up at the front of the room to start the speeches. Leah shifted in her seat, having her back faced toward the front of the room, to see her other cousin, Grace, holding the microphone. Was this night over yet? “I’m so glad my baby sister has found love. You deserve all the happiness in the world. I remember when we were kids. We would draw out our wedding plans all the time and pretend Barbie and Ken were the most important people in the world and try to get them into all kinds of trouble. When you told me you and Sam were engaged, I knew it was something right. I could tell from your tone alone that he made you so happy.”

Leah tried to stay neutral and be a good bridesmaid as Emily grew teary-eyed. It was a lifetime ago that the three girls understood one another; one Leah had trouble remembering sometimes, especially when she saw Sam and Emily together.

“I love you, little sister, and I wish you and my new brother-in-law every happiness that this world carries and eventually, the happiness a family brings. Being a mom is the best thing that had happened to me and I wish that joy of parenthood for you both.”

When Embry got up to speak, Leah tensed again for another sappy speech. “Well, first, I want to say congratulations to the happy bride and groom. Secondly, I want to second Grace’s motion for all of the happiness in the world and lots of Uley babies,” there were a few laughs in the room and Leah closed her eyes momentarily to try and picture the small brown-eyed baby she always imagined in her arms, Sam by her side. 

She had been young when she was with Sam, but he was her everything; her future. She would have got up to get some air if everyone wasn’t sat down, intent on listening to Embry’s words, but her leaving would cause too much of a scene; she had to lay low tonight. 

“I also want to say Sam, you’ve been a great leader the last year and I don’t think any of us would have gotten through it if you hadn’t been our rock.” There were people not wolf-friendly in the audience, so they had to keep the language sensitive. “I remember the first time I went cliff-diving with you,” Embry grinned brightly. “And you guys pushed me off the cliffs… It was the biggest rush ever, and probably the scariest thing I’ve ever done, but from then on you guys always made me feel like a brother and I know despite anything else, you are a brother to me.” 

Sam and Embry shared an embrace as Embry took his seat again. Leah was even touched by Embry’s words, because despite how horrible the past year and a half had been… well, Sam did assist them all in figuring out their wolf and she wasn’t sure what that transformation would have been like with a stranger, despite the heartache she felt being thrown together with him so soon after the break-up. At least he was familiar.

His friendly voice had been a saving grace in the chaos, but also a blow to her heart. But he was the one who got Jared to fetch her clothes after she changed back while he protected her indecent body, smoothing her hair and telling her it would be okay. She remembered his words hadn’t been very affirmative, likely because as the first female wolf they knew of, he wasn’t sure how things would turn out and because it was the first time they had been together since the break-up despite his numerous attempts to make things right.

Embry handed Sam the microphone before sitting down and Sam cleared his throat. “Thank you all for coming today, it means a lot to Emily and me that you’re all here to celebrate today with us. Enjoy your evening, the bar, and have fun.”

Leah watched as everyone started to dissipate, clearing tables out of the way until the lovely couple got called to the dance floor for a rendition of ‘Heaven’. Leah got up to visit the ladies room and on her way back she met Rachel.

Jacob looked over as the dance floor took shape and saw Leah and Rachel talking off to the side so he took solace in being off duty for a little while and joined the guys as the happy couple found their place in the center of the dance floor. Jacob watched them swing around and wondered if he would ever get married. Would Renesmee want that? He smiled thinking of the small child who made him so happy. Maybe someday, he decided. As the couple swung around, everyone hooted and started clinking their glasses in hand to get them to kiss and Jacob realized there really wasn’t anything imperfect about Sam and Emily’s love, despite Leah being a constant reminder that their lives weren’t the dream fairy tale it seemed to be. 

Leah found it hard to take her eyes off of the newlyweds on the dance floor, but Rachel kept talking, giving her a much appreciated distraction.

“I know we always thought that would be you and Sam, but hey, you’ll find your wolf-charming,” she teased. Leah could see the pity in her eyes, and it made her uneasy. 

Leah shook her head, “I probably won’t imprint.”

Rachel shrugged, “So? You don’t have to imprint to be happy.”

It just made it a hell of a lot easier, the she wolf thought. 

The song came to an end and Emily was called to the dance floor with her dad. 

Leah frowned watching her uncle swing around the dance floor with her cousin. That would never be her. Largely, because the man she loved was already married, but also because her dad wouldn’t be able to be there if she ever did get over Sam and committed herself to someone else. It was bittersweet, but she was extremely glad Emily got to have her dance with her dad.

“It never gets easier,” Rachel said sadly. “Losing a parent.”

“How do you do it?” Leah choked out as she watched Emily wipe her happy tears away, feeling a lump rising in her own throat.

“I don’t know. It hurts every day a little less. I’ve learned even after the worst thing in the world happens and you think you’ll never get over it, you do. You just keep living.”

“I don’t know if I’ll ever get over not having my dad here.” Mainly because the blame she felt for his death was deeply ingrained into her conscience and she hadn’t yet been able to shake the guilt for being the catalyst of his fatal heart attack.

“I get that,” Rachel said softly. “But you’re strong, you’ll be fine.”

“No I’m not,” she breathed. “I want to leave every day, I just physically can’t.” She had a taste of freedom in Jacob’s pack – away from Sam and she missed it so badly, for both of their sake. “I’d already be gone if I could.” They were the truest words she said in a long time. 

“But I’m here now,” Rachel offered sweetly. “I know I can’t quite fill the void Emily and Sam left, but we are going to make our own memories now.”

Leah smiled thankfully as the father/daughter dance came to an end and then Sam started swinging around the room with his mother. Leah let her eyes follow him around the dance floor as Rachel started commenting on the decor.

A new waiter came by with a tray full of wine and extended it to the girls. 

Leah grabbed two glasses and gulped down the first. She had to get through this night somehow. Rachel giggled, “Thirsty?”

Leah was settling for as drunk as she could possibly get tonight, though kept the tequila at-bay. The music came to an end and the bridal party was called to the floor – forcing her to down the second glass quickly to try and make a quick escape. She felt the alcohol settling in her belly as she placed the second wine glass on a nearby table and turned to make her way outside to get some air. As far as she was concerned, her bridesmaid duties were over with after the ceremony and after the three martinis she had with supper and the two glasses of wine, she was starting to build up her emotional resolve, but she didn’t get a chance to run before Jacob grabbed her arm just as she was about to push open the emergency exit.

“You weren’t really going to leave me out there all by myself were you?” He mused as he gestured her toward the dance floor where everyone was accumulated. 

“I was strongly considering it,” she answered dryly as he tugged on her arm, bringing them both to the dance floor. 

“Aw, c’mon, Lee. That’s not very nice, I thought we were really making progress sulking together tonight.”

“I never promised to be nice today, I said I would be on good behavior.”

“Being nice is considered good behavior,” Jacob taunted.

“To Emily and Sam, yes.”

“Technically, you’ve been avoiding them at every cost, so I’m not sure that constitutes nice. I think you’re cheating.”

She rolled her eyes as they reached the dance floor and they all took their places as “My Wish” by Rascall Flatts started playing. Jacob’s arms wrapped around her waist and his hands rested on the small of her back as she hesitantly let her arms wrap around his neck. Being so close to a man in such an intimate setting was strange for Leah, especially since it was Jacob Black. She would much rather her comfortable place on the sidelines drinking wine with Rachel and trying to listen to her idle chitchat. It did hit her, however, in that moment, how attractive Jacob had grown in manhood -- especially in a suit. He was a long way from the boy who she played with in the sandbox. 

His suit hugged his broad shoulders snugly and he had the jacket undone, his white dress shirt fitting his torso nicely. He had his short hair gelled over to the side and she forgot how nice it was to be near a guy who was significantly taller than her thanks to her phasing growth-spurt. Jacob’s eyes scanned the room and she tried not to let her eyes dwell on him for a noticeable period, but she was reminded once again how grown up he was. When their two packs faced off during the Cullen’s hunting trip before Renesmee was born, Leah remembered Jacob’s authority being very appealing. However, she had shrugged it off to the fact that anytime Sam seemed to be put in his place, she was happy, but looking at him now made her wonder if she rationalized some unspoken tension between them in a more innocent way. How many had she had to drink?

“Are you nervous, Ms. Clearwater?” Jacob asked teasingly as his eyes looked back down to her. 

Leah’s eyes squinted into a glare, but the brown pools held no hostility and her lips quirked up into a small grin. “Because of you? You wish.”

“You don’t look as unapproachable when you actually smile, you know,” Jacob adjusted his hands on the small of her back, moving them up slightly to avoid letting them hover too closely to her backside – surely she would hang him later with accusations of him trying to take advantage or something equally as absurd. But he wasn’t exactly talking to the sanest person he knew, either.

“How much have you had to drink?”

Jacob smirked. “Not enough. I bet I can out-drink you, though.”

Leah raised a brow. “Is this a competition, Mr. Black?” Her competitive side couldn’t resist the taunt.

Jacob nodded. “You’re on.” 

“You know you shouldn’t have a drinking contest with someone older than you,” Leah dug.

Jacob shook his head. “What is it anyways with you women? Age is always such an issue.”

Despite her better intentions, Leah couldn’t help herself. “Well clearly considering you’re intending on dating someone who’s what now? Five? I think you should be the one hung-up on age here.”

“Funny,” Jacob answered dryly. 

The song ended and the two wolves really did go head to head, slamming back the drinks. Leah was more tolerant from her high school partying days, but Jacob was bigger. The two sat at the bar and lost track of how many songs had come and gone. They were surrounded by the other wolves as the night progressed and Leah, surprisingly, found herself having a pretty good time. Her mom checked in a couple of times to make sure she was okay, but Sue was confident in the company of Seth and the rest of the guys, Leah would be fine. She didn’t want to hover too much.

As one of her favorite songs coming on, she turned, the room spinning slightly – Brown Eyed Girl. She got up and decided she could have a little fun tonight.

“Where are you going?” Jacob called out to her as she walked backwards toward the dance floor.

It was time to throw him a bone for being so tolerant of her all day. “Are you going to let me have all the fun?” She taunted before he stumbled off the bar stool and laughed, following her to the dance floor. Jared and Kim followed out, too, and the floor was packed. Leah barely paid attention to anyone out there; she just knew Sam and Emily had managed to slip off of it for once because they were nowhere to be seen.

She and Jacob spun around the dance floor shamelessly and drunkenly, continually bumping in to others – and each other. “I wouldn’t peg you for a Van Morrison kind of girl,” he admitted, screaming over the music.

“Why? Who would you ‘peg’ me as, then?” 

“Slayer,” he snorted.

Leah hit his arm and they laughed until the song ended, fueled by the warm liquid flowing through their veins. “Another round?” 

Jacob had to admit defeat. “I feel like the room is still moving,” he smirked. “I think I’m calling it quits, Clearwater. You win.” Plus he did have pack things to do in the morning considering he had to be at the Clearwater’s for the pack meeting around 10AM and Sue was insistent on cooking a late breakfast. He checked his watch and saw it was getting close to 1 AM. It hurt his pride, but he knew this was a battle he wouldn’t win against Leah’s broken heart and years of teenage parties that he hadn’t had the privilege of attending as a wolf. 

As the music shifted to a slow tune the dance floor started to dissipate, but it was a song Leah knew all too well: “From this Moment On” by Shania Twain. Her and Sam’s song from high school. Jacob was waiting for a snide comment to come from the she wolf’s lips at him giving her the win, but her whole demeanor had shifted and the look on her face made his heart hurt for her. What happened? Was she just an emotional drunk? He was sure she would be the first to gloat about her win, but her eyes seemed far away. Admittedly, he really didn’t want to deal with a sobbing Leah tonight; he was hopeful to avoid that. Any other time, he knew Leah could control it, but the look on her face made Jacob’s own stomach tighten in a knot. 

“Can I cut in?” 

Jacob turned to see Sam standing behind him, looking at Leah who looked like a deer in the headlights, tears springing to her eyes. She hadn’t listened to this song since they had broken up; it stirred up too many emotions she tried desperately to keep at bay. Jacob barely recognized the girl in front of him by her sudden flow of emotion. Even during their short moments of real conversation between them, he never saw her eyes fill with tears. She had been doing great until now. If anything, he would have pegged her breakdown at the ceremony, not now after she had really looked like she was having some fun after all day brooding. He almost felt her mood shift -- they had been pretty in-tune with one another during their time patrolling together.

Sam extended his hand to Leah, and some irrational part of her mind couldn’t deny him. Jacob felt like he should protect her as her alpha, but as she took Sam’s outstretched hand and he drew her close -- but nothing too intimate, he backed down and went back to his seat at the bar with Embry and Seth. Leah was a big girl and no one knew better than he did that she would kick his ass if he didn’t think she could take care of herself, but something still didn’t sit right with him - she had looked so forlorn.

Leah awkwardly placed her hands on Sam’s shoulders to keep some space between them. Her chest tightened as she inhaled his scent. She knew this was a bad idea, but she couldn’t resist any chance to be close to Sam, despite how far they had come from the crazy teenage lovers they had been. 

“I didn’t know they were going to play this,” he admitted softly. “I’m sorry.” Always so attentive.

Leah felt her entire body ache for Sam to pull her closer and hold her and give her a safe place to let her pent-up emotions out like he used to when they were younger and her eyes burning with unshed tears. The last time they had been this close was when he comforted her when her father passed.

They had changed so much from the two people who used to hold one another in bed whispering sweet nothings and promising some sort of forever. “What do you want?” Leah asked softly.

“To make sure you’re okay,” he said honestly.

“What do you think?” Leah scanned the dance floor to try and keep Sam from seeing the tears glazing her vision. There were many couples swinging around them so at least they probably weren’t the spectacle of the floor. 

“Leah? Please… look at me.” He was pleading with her; he felt terrible. Her eyes always gave too much away, at least when it came to him. She hated herself for not being able to put her walls up with him. It was so easy to be cold, calm, and collected with everyone else, but not Sam. She always had been an open book, although she desperately tried to keep her resolve when it came to him since phasing, it was hard to pretend when someone knew you better than you knew yourself.

The small female looked up at him and felt the alcohol swimming inside of her; liquid courage. “We shouldn’t be here.” 

“I would do anything to make it right with you,” he said honestly. “Is there anything I can do, anything at all?”

Leah took a deep breath in and let it out slowly to keep her temper under control. “It’s too little too late for some crappy patch job of our relationship.” If that’s even what she would call their interactions at this point. “I’m happy you found Emily; I just wish I wasn’t stuck here to watch. Do you know how horrible I feel?” She asked. Sam stayed quiet, wanting her to continue. “Every time I see you, I don’t feel like me anymore. I’m some sick person who is longing after someone who is now technically family considering you married my cousin. That’s... well, gross, don’t you think?”

Sam couldn’t help but to grin – it was the Leah he had known and loved with her quick wit and sharp tongue. “How much have you had to drink, Leah?”

“I’ve lost count.” 

They hadn’t been able to have a civil conversation since the day they broke-up. “Just because I let you go, doesn’t mean I wanted to,” Sam said softly. “That has never and will never change and I’m thankful that Emily accepts that there will always be a piece of me who wishes things were differently.” Leah was his weakness, but Emily was his beckoning call home. “I’m sorry things couldn’t be different between us.” But he loved Emily and sometimes he hated that because he knew how much it hurt Leah. It hadn’t been his choice to imprint, but now that he had, everything felt right; except for the broken girl with damp eyes in his arms.

“But that love wasn’t enough and neither was I,” her voice broke on the last word. She had struggled with wondering why she wasn’t his imprint for so long; what was wrong with her? Other than changing into a huge wolf and her lack of kindness and compassion as of lately, she was… or, well, used to be good. So why wasn’t she good enough for Sam?

“Leah, that’s not what this is about…” They were still on the dance floor and the song was coming to an end. “It wasn’t that you weren’t good enough. I wasn’t good enough for you.”

Leah actually laughed, but it was cold. “That’s why you’re happy and I’m miserable, right? I really do wish you both the best,” Leah said as the song came to an end. She dropped her arms and turned on her heel before she felt her tears start falling but Sam grasped her arm gently, turning her toward him.

“I don’t want you to be miserable,” he said softly as an upbeat song came on and the couples started leaving the dance floor. “Come outside with me for a minute?” He couldn’t let her go off alone when she was upset and the pain in her face broke him. Did she really think it was her fault he hadn’t imprinted on her? That there was something wrong with her? They hadn’t been able to openly talk about this before, so he was surprised to hear what she really thought aside from the small tendrils she let slip in wolf form.

Leah felt weak, powerless, and entirely done with this day. Her earlier alcohol buzz was slowly fading, the sobriety of the moment started hitting her full force. Her tears weren’t willing to wait any longer. She nodded and Sam took her hand, walking out to the front deck with her. Everyone else was inside and he automatically engulfed her into his arms before the first sob escaped her lips. Their break-up hadn’t been this emotional, she realized, and she knew she had been right before when she figured today would be worse than that solemn day that he told her he couldn’t be with her anymore. Despite his words back then, Leah had hope that he would change his mind. Even up until today, she wondered if he would really go through with the wedding. Now, she had her answer; her closure.

Sam smelled good and his arms felt like they were the only thing keeping her on her feet so she let herself crack, not that she had much of a choice because the emotions were fueling her now were amplified by the liquor in her blood and she felt so broken watching his fairy-tale play out without her – without hope. 

“Oh Lee-Lee,” he murmured as he gently caressed her hair. He felt his own heart breaking holding her in his arms, seeing the pain he had put her through not only today but for over the past year. He had tried to mend fences between them, but Leah kept demolishing them to avoid… well, this. It would do no good to tell her how sorry he was anymore, but he wasn’t sure how to make things cordial between them, if not for himself, but for Emily’s sake; he knew she missed her best friend – the girls had been like sisters. Sam was willing to bet Leah missed Emily just as much. 

She wasn’t sure how long they stood there and how long it was before her tears had finally dried, but Sam kept her in his arms and continued to smooth her hair. 

“Are you happy?” Leah pulled back slightly to look up at him, knowing what a damn mess she looked like, but needing to see his face.

Sam’s kept his arms loosely wrapped around her torso as he met her pained gaze. “I am happy with Emily – but that doesn’t at all diminish how happy I was when it was us. Maybe it wasn’t our endgame for whatever reason, but Leah, what we had was real for me. I will always love you.”

Leah heard the door open and pulled away from Sam – which was excruciatingly hard to do considering it was so easy to pretend things were different with him holding her, to turn her back to the door and lean against the railing.

I will always love you.

The words rung through her head on a permanent repeat. If he loved her, why wasn’t she enough? Why would she never be enough? How could he love Emily the same way they loved each other? She knew – mostly from the guys thoughts, that Sam hadn’t necessarily fell out of love with her – he had just found it stronger with Emily, but hearing him say those words hurt.

Suddenly, she felt exhausted and still pretty spent from the alcohol. She probably wouldn’t have been so obviously emotional if not for the alcohol that told her it was okay to not be okay; it always had been deceiving and pushed her toward foolish actions.

Jacob came outside and nodded to Sam. He wanted to make sure everything was okay. Sam didn’t get to do this to her; not today, “I got it,” Jacob told the older wolf. Being together in their pack allowed him to see a much more vulnerable side of Leah - and had pushed them towards becoming friends and bonding over their misfortune instead of making it a competition like they always had before. 

Leah always won, of course, because in her rationale - he was never ‘actually with’ Bella like she had been with Sam. It made sense - only Leah would try to have the better heartbreak; but seeing her in Sam’s arms made him wonder how much he really knew about her - how deep her heart was actually scarred when Sam left instead of hiding behind the bitchy demeanor she used to cover her wounds.

Sam hesitated but nodded, deciding he needed to give Leah some space. He went back inside to find Emily, and Jacob waited until the door was shut before walking over to stand beside Leah and lean on the railing, extending a beer to her, his own half-drank. 

“Hey, I’ve found a second wind on our drinking competition, it’s not over yet, Clearwater.” 

Leah hesitated before taking the drink and putting it to her lips, wiping away the remnants of tears on her cheeks. “You already admitted defeat,” she said dully. She felt numb, but her eyes still burned with unshed tears and her head was spinning with a million questions she would never get an answer to and that wouldn’t matter even if she did.

“You can do better than that,” he said pointedly, leaning on the railing beside her whether she liked it or not. He felt an obligation to ensure his second-in-command was okay and be there for her, as uncomfortable as it made him. Sam got to see a very different side of Leah than anyone else. If he tried to take Leah into his arms and comfort her like Sam had, he surely would get punched in the face and unlike when Bella did it, Leah’s wolf-force would probably break something.

“Jacob, just go back inside.”

“What did he say?” He asked. He had never seen Leah Clearwater with damp cheeks (aside from when her dad died) and it was hard to see her so vulnerable - she tried to be anything but.

“Why are you so stubborn?” She cleared her throat and took another sip of her beer.

“I think that’s a trait of Alpha’s,” he said coolly, looking out to the brush nearby as the trees swayed gently in the wind. When she didn’t answer, Jacob looked back over at the she wolf and her eyes seemed far away.

“Why do I still want him?” She asked softly, feeling Jacob’s eyes on her. “After all of this time and everything that has happened; why was the best and the worse part of today being close to him?” He always had the power to center her, until he was the reason that she needed centering. “I’m trying, I’ve been trying, but… I don’t know how to move on in this town.”

”Leah…” Jacob sighed, slightly confused as he saw the tears welling in her eyes again. He shifted awkwardly on his feet, wondering how to approach this. One wrong word and he could be in big trouble - and he wasn’t entirely steady on his feet to feud a physical attack from Leah thanks to their drinking competition, though some part of him told him that she wasn’t in the mood to fight.

He hadn’t realized how truly broken she was over Sam until that moment. How much her heart broke every second she had to watch him with Emily. He suddenly felt terrible for arguing with her and insulting her obsession with their former Alpha - even though she one hundred percent deserved it in the moment. Jacob was a little inept at female emotion - especially Leah’s. He was in deep water right now, he realized, and he couldn’t touch the bottom no matter how hard he tried. He was just splashing around, trying to make it seem like he knew what he was doing and wasn’t trying to plan his escape to safety. Maybe he should go and get Seth or her mom.

“What if this never gets better?” Her voice broke on her words, and Jacob instinctively reached out and put a hand on her shoulder. Leah turned away from him and placed her elbows on the railing, burying her face into her hands so Jacob wouldn’t see the fresh tears falling over her cheeks. She hated herself for being weak, but she just wanted to be alone to get into a better head space. She was too upset to notice the door crack open and Emily stick her head out. Jacob gave her a quick head shake to let her know it wasn’t a good time. 

Jacob didn’t know what to do. “I’ll be right back, okay?”

Leah ignored him and tried to slow the tears streaking her face, taking a deep breath in. She was a fucking mess and she hated herself for being so weak. She had almost got through the entire day unscathed. Admittedly, it was probably her own fault for having a few too many drinks and letting Sam close when she knew better, but she couldn’t lie to herself and say she regretted taking Sam’s hand on that dance floor - not when she could still smell his cologne on her dress. It was intoxicating. 

Jacob went over to where Emily was and ushered her inside. “Is she okay?” Sam stood behind Emily, pinching the bridge of his nose. Leah hadn’t tried to ruin their happy mood, but by the look on Sam’s face, he was beating himself up again for hurting Leah.

”I should have known it was a bad idea to ask her to stand… I’m sorry, Jacob,” Emily said sadly. “I… I thought you said she was better: in your pack.”

Although Jacob was hurting for Leah, he didn’t want to be arguing with Sam and Emily. “Leah knew what she was getting herself into when she agreed, it’s not your fault,” Jacob said to Emily, gaining a thankful look from Sam. He looked between them and sighed. “Listen, she needs someone, and it looks like for right now, that will have to be me. She’s drank too much, she’s over-emotional, and she just needs to sleep it off, okay? You guys go and enjoy the rest of your night and I’ll make sure she gets home safely. Let Seth know I’m taking her home.”

Sam nodded, “Thank you, Jacob.”

Jacob turned on his heel and went back outside to join Leah - who wasn’t on the deck anymore. He looked around, catching a glimpse of a figure half-way down the road. Jacob sighed and ran to catch up with her, feeling his head spinning at the fast motion. 

He caught up with her quickly, “Let me walk you home, it’s time for me to hit the hay, too, and I could use the company.” It wasn’t him he was worried about needing company, but Leah would never take any help in the form of sympathy.

“You don’t have to babysit me, I’ll be fine.” Her face was dry now, and he could feel her walls starting to slam back up. 

“Oh, c’mon, Leah. We both know you’re the older, wiser one. If anything, you’ll be babysitting me,” he teased.

”You don’t even like me, Jacob. Not really.”

Jacob fell in pace with her and tried to collect his thoughts. “I do like you, Leah. Maybe I tolerated you for the sake of numbers at first when you came over to my pack but… you can’t deny that we got close. I would even go as far to say that we may actually be friends,” he said cockily, trying to lighten the mood, remembering their conversation during dinner at his house the week before about them avoiding one another to ensure people didn’t think they were actually friends. But, well, they were.

”I wouldn’t go that far,” her sarcasm slipped back in, causing Jacob to grin.

The two continued walking the short distance home on the vacant La Push roads and Leah was thoroughly enjoying the silence, until Jacob broke it. 

“Sometimes love just chooses you I guess,” he said profoundly. “Even when the person you love chooses someone else, or has it chosen for them, that doesn’t mean you just stop caring. Even though Bella continually chose Edward, a part of me thought she would change her mind and I had to be there if that were to have happened.”

Leah sighed, “I’m sick of being second-best.”

”You’re not second-best, Leah. Sam chose you when he could choose.”

”It doesn’t matter now.”

“Well, you left before the bouquet toss, so now you’ll never know if you’re next.”

Leah looked over to him, eyebrow arched. “Rachel’s next.”

“You’ll never know,” he shrugged, a grin playing on his lips before silence fell between them again. He knew she was in her head and he wanted to help. “You know, you did really well today. I mean… I only showed up at the end of the dance of Edward and Bella’s wedding and, well, I still had to be forcibly removed,” he said, finding it amusing now, but not so much back then when the future for the girl he loved had been so uncertain. He was trying to make her laugh, but Leah seemed too in her head to find any humor in his efforts. “Look at you now, not even taking any satisfaction in someone else’s misfortune. Have you grown soft on me?” 

“You’re the one playing with kids all the time,” she said teased, looking up at him as they walked with a hint of a smile behind her cloudy eyes.

He rolled his eyes and smirked. The road was speckled with dampness from a new sprinkle of mist falling from the sky and it looked so beautiful – maybe that was the alcohol. “You know what; Ness is a pretty cool preteen.”

Leah laughed. “Is that the imprint talking or are you showing me your paternal side?”

“I am pretty good with kids, Seth still idolizes me.”

“Seth doesn’t count because he’s a teenager, now and he’s clearly not in the right frame of mind; mom dropped him a lot as a child,” she retorted. “Plus, he kind of has to idolize you considering you’re the alpha.”

“You don’t idolize me because of that,” he joked.

She snorted, “Ha, right, that’s a good one, Jake. Not on your life. I’m not worried about what you think.” Though, her thoughts ran back to earlier to their bodies close together on the dance floor and she felt the familiar intrigue rise in her belly.

“I guess I should be honored you’re even speaking to me, huh?”

She looked up to him as they grew closer to Jacob’s house, their earlier mirth seeping back into their conversation. “That’s a matter of opinion.” 

Jacob recalled the day he first really spent time with Leah since womanhood had graced her with its presence. Their dads went out fishing and Leah and Sam just started their relationship. He was forced outside to play with Seth while Leah gushed about Sam to his sisters and spent the rest of the day talking to him on the phone. Those details were easy to forget, however, in comparison to her slightly widened hips, fuller chest, and face covered in make-up that made her look older and more mature than she really was. Back then he, too, thought she was attractive – and way out of his league. 

He remembered thinking that she wasn’t the girl he grew up with anymore. The girl who had two missing front teeth for months, liked to play with bugs more than him, and that he had once thought about kissing as an awkward twelve-year-old. The Leah before Sam had been so tomboyish and rough, and the Leah with Sam had surely been every guy on the reservations wet dream. Embry had been devastated when Leah and Sam solidified their relationship even though she barely had spoken three words to him back then.

Flash forward to now. She was finally a single woman and they all pointedly ignored and avoided her. She hadn’t gotten any less attractive -- despite his better judgement and admission to the guys earlier, he had caught glimpses of her during her phasing transition, but up until lately, she had made it so hard to be around her. 

As she walked beside him, however, he noticed how her hips swung slightly with every step in her high heels and how the dress only just skimmed the top of her chest and her lashes were so long and dark, framing her chocolate brown eyes nicely. Jacob blinked, focusing his eyes back on the pretty water droplets on the road, wondering where his mind was even going. He wasn’t used to being drunk, so he blamed it on the alcohol swimming in his veins. 

They reached Jacob’s house; Leah’s wasn’t until further down the road, and although he did intend on walking her the whole way, she stopped. Jacob looked down at the she wolf. "Want me to walk you the rest of the way?"  
Leah shook her head but did still feel a little tipsy on her feet. “I'll be fine. I'm not scared of the big, bad wolf -- or any bloodsuckers, either."

Jacob grinned but felt her presence tonight actually enjoyable for the most part. Somehow, he was always pulled to helping broken women. He was glad for the simplicity with Renesmee, but as Leah kept pointing out, she was still only a child and had lots to grow and complicate.

"I had fun tonight," Jacob stated idly.

"Me, too." Despite her entire day being full of emotion, Jacob made the day a little less lonely.

The two were on Jacob's front lawn and it must have been the alcohol that allowed her to open-up to Jacob. Maybe it was because he understood -- he had gone through pining over someone he couldn't have and other similar situations as her. Or maybe it was just because Jacob did really listen and try to help someone when they needed it, despite her trying to fend off his futile attempts. 

Whatever the rationale behind it, she reached out and wrapped her arms around Jacob's waist, embracing his large, sturdy frame into a hug. "Thanks, Jake." She appreciated his company and she had to admit, she would rather go home smelling of Jacob than Sam’s cologne from earlier. She would never be able to sleep.

Jacob's brow furrowed as Leah got close to him and he instinctively wrapped his arms loosely around her waist. He gave her a small squeeze back, wearily, as though she was a grenade that could blow at any second if he wasn’t careful. She smelled good, though, he would give her that, and his inner man considered how good she felt against his chest. He snapped back into reality as she pulled back and his inner wolf reminded him of Renesmee, making him wonder where the Hell his mind had been going tonight.

Leah pulled back and Jacob saw the vulnerability in her eyes. It made her so much more attractive than when she was fixed with a scowl; she seemed more like a real person. His inner man started to take over, silencing the wolf with the alcohol from earlier. Likewise, Leah could see interest in Jacob’s eyes; he was looking at her, really looking. He saw the pain in her eyes, and the exhaustion of trying to mask it. He also saw her walls slowly coming down and liked the way her dress strap had fallen off of her shoulder to rest half-way down her arm and that she didn’t need to wear a coat in the cold weather because they were both the same temperature.

There was something so primal and intoxicating building between them, and all of a sudden, Leah leaned closer to Jacob, his arms still resting on her hips from their hug earlier, and suddenly, their lips were pressed together with fiery intensity fueled both by loneliness and drunkenness. 

Jacob momentarily wondered what the hell was happening; he was imprinted! But he was also a young man and… well, he had physical and emotional needs that his imprint could not yet meet. There was nothing wrong with this, was there? He was like a brother to Renesmee, nothing more as of now and that Nahuel guy said it could be seven years until she was fully matured despite her current accelerated rate. Did he really want to wait until he was almost thirty to kiss a woman again? Yes! His inner wolf beckoned. But as their kisses started to become more heated, his inner man silenced the wolf again, his own desires taking precedent – his own mind.

Leah’s tongue slipped past his lips and he was impotent. Deciding she wasn’t taking control, his Alpha-tendencies taking over, his fingers slipped down to her hips, pulling her close. She surprised herself as her instincts kicked in and a small moan escaped from her lips as Jacob’s tongue fought hers for dominance, their bodies pressing tightly together. There was something so primal about it and Leah barely stopped to think about what they were doing; it felt too good and she was so tired of over-thinking and over-analyzing. Who cared? Maybe the concoction of alcohol had something to do with it, too, but she was feeling more herself and less pathetic in that moment than she had in weeks – months, even.  
Jacob almost faltered as he heard the small, sweet sound escape her lips, but he grunted in response and pushed her up against the nearby railing of their front steps, his hands figuring out what to do as he gripped her hip with one and the other slipped down to push the dress up so he could feel the skin on her thigh. He wanted to tangle his fingers in her short hair, but he liked the feeling of her torso on his too much to move and risk losing their close proximity.

Leah felt a little overwhelmed and found enough strength to pull back by pushing gently on Jacob’s chest. She was out of breath and took in a long breath of air before opening her closed eyes. This was the first time her body had responded to anyone besides Sam. It felt foreign, but exciting, until she realized he was imprinted, and they were the two least likely people to end up doing anything like this. They could barely stand each other, right? 

“I’m sorry,” Jacob said quickly, feeling as though he should apologize for some odd reason as the cool air hit his face with her absence. After all, Bella was the last girl he kissed, on the top of the cliffs before the newborn attack and this… well, this was a step-up of intensity for sure. His body wanted her in ways he never thought possible for anyone but Nessie and in that moment, he felt conflicted. This was Leah Clearwater! What the fuck was he doing??

Leah shook her head and looked up to meet his gaze; they were only a foot-length apart, but she suddenly felt cold where his body had been. “No… I just…” There were so many reasons why this couldn’t happen. She could make a list! But there was also a heat building up inside of her that wanted to be released, a deep desire for his touch. She wanted to be wanted and without putting too much thought into it, she said the words that she knew from his thoughts would evoke a reaction. “Kiss me, Jacob.” 

Jacob was slightly confused and, well, turned on by the she wolf before him. The words that he had willed Bella to say time and time again rang in the air, but they were coming from a woman with a deeper voice and a body temperature that matched his. Leah’s face was flushed, and her lips swollen. How long had they been kissing? He didn’t need to be asked twice, though, as his inner man took over, silencing his wolf who wanted to wait for his imprint to do any of these things with. He had things he wanted, too, and his inner wolf needed to take a step back tonight. 

Jacob leaned in and kissed her again and the urgency of their kisses before quickly resumed. Jacob’s hands found their way up and down her back and down to her thigh again. It barely occurred to them that anyone could walk by anytime, but as Leah moaned again against his lips and a groan caught in the back of his throat, he realized they should probably either stop or take this somewhere more private. He knew which option he preferred. 

Jacob broke away regrettably, feeling some sort of sobering feeling crashing down on him. “What are we doing?”

“Who cares?” Leah said softly. As Jacob studied the pink coloring in her cheeks and her messy hair from his hands that had finally made the journey to her short black locks, he also pictured her dress being torn off which surprised both his inner wolf and man at the abrupt sexual tension building inside him for… well, Leah Clearwater. She had always been off-limits; Sam’s. This was Leah! Leah freaking Clearwater! If Sam didn’t kill him, Leah probably would herself when they sobered up. This had to be the alcohol, and he had to be insane. The fact that he was having such an inner battle made him realize he was either not as drunk as he thought, or maybe too drunk to control his thoughts and make a rational decision. Either way, this ended badly.

“Leah…” Jacob was having trouble for once in his life finding words. “You should go home.” Maybe that was too harsh, but he wasn’t really going to take this somewhere more private, was he? Was she?

What was Jacob insinuating? “You don’t want this?” The female wolf asked, knowing it would edge him on as her fingers gently grazed over his lower abdomen, playing with the hem of his un-tucked dress shirt. She didn’t want Sam to have a claim on her body anymore. She did feel a slight sense of embarrassment and anticipation waiting for his answer, but she could tell Jacob wanted to, so why were they even having this conversation? It was just sex; primal, simple, and satisfying. No strings attached.

Jacob chuckled and ran a hand through his own, shorter hair as the drizzle coming down from the sky misted over their skin and their torsos pressed firmly together. He stepped back momentarily and took a few deep breaths in. “You think I don’t want to?” 

Leah shrugged, “You’re just standing there.” Liquid courage was an amazing thing, she realized. Not that she wasn’t challenging on a daily basis, but toward Jacob? For… this? It had to be the alcohol. Or maybe just the dry spell rearing its ugly, needy head. She and Sam barely went a week without being intimate, even if it meant getting creative with parents being around, and now? She had been over a year without any physical intimacy. She watched as Jacob unbuttoned the top button of his shirt and loosened his tie, the heat of the moment boiling his heightened temperature further and her eyes studied the muscles of his arms that were showing through his button-down; tensed.

Jacob took a deep breath. Why was he trying to rationalize this? There was a hot girl in front of him asking him to stop over-thinking this! If anything, it could give him a fun night and some experience down the road. But there was always a catch, wasn’t there? A catch-22. And surely this one would come back to bite him later – hard. 

“I’m not going to stand here all night, Jacob.” 

Why was she being so level-headed about this? Had she had more to drink than he originally thought? Was she just acting out of irrationality and being upset over Sam? Did she need to feel something, anything, other than what she experienced with Sam outside on that deck? Surely, she would be imagining another man if they did this. Or maybe it was his imprint that made this decision so difficult when it really shouldn’t be, the wolf still trying to taunting him away from the she wolf before him and silence his inner man to go inside by himself and go to bed - alone, and forget this ever happened. 

But he had to decide. 

“Well don’t just stand there,” he said before he enclosed the distance between them, the she wolf’s lips on his again and he felt her reach down to start unbuttoning his shirt. Jacob pulled back again and Leah was about to protest, but he took her hand and led her off to the side of the house and into the small adjacent garage. Billy could be home any moment, so it was too risky to go inside and if anyone saw them outside like this, they would never live it down. You’re never going to live this down anyways, his wolf taunted him. Not with Leah, the guys, or Renesmee. He had to push the thoughts away and focus on Leah - the sexual tension in the garage that was palpable.

Leah’s brow furrowed. With Sam, it had been so… romantic. This was so unexpected and spur of the moment and there was really nothing romantic about it. Which is what she loved about it. As Jacob shut the door, he let her hand go before going over to turn on a couple oil lamps. It did make the old garage seem more enticing but didn’t give off enough light to attract anyone of life inside.

“The garage?” Leah smirked. “Really, Jacob?”

“Take it or leave it, Clearwater,” he said, going back over to her and wrapping his arms tightly around her waist, pulling her roughly towards him. “Unless you have somewhere better in mind.”

“Maybe I should leave it,” she said tauntingly. 

Jacob turned and raised a brow. “I dare you.” She felt her stomach flutter as Jacob pulled her close again and his strong arms and broad shoulders caused her to shiver. How didn’t she realize how buff Jacob had gotten before now? Considering she was constantly around a bunch of pretty muscular guys; it probably wasn’t unusual for her to have not of noticed. She was usually preoccupied with other things.

Jacob picked her up and placed her on the wooden workbench after pushing some tools aside. He was sure some fell on the floor, but he didn’t care. He had come a long way from fixing motorcycles in there with Bella. 

Jacob kissed Leah with a bruising intensity and as Leah fully unbuttoned his shirt, Jacob finally brought his hands down to pull her dress up, over her thighs. Leah’s fingers faltered where Jacob’s kept exploring new territory. He had seen Leah naked before, and she had seen him, too, but this was an entirely different context. Jacob reached behind to undo the zipper of her dress, but it was stuck. Positive he could get it off without unzipping it, he pulled it over her head and only a second later it was on the ground and her body was free for his hands to explore. 

“I thought you were the older, wiser one?” Jacob teased her as her cheeks flushed. 

“I’m out of practice,” she admitted as she pushed his shirt off his shoulders before reaching down to undo his belt.

Jacob grinned as he began kissing down her cheek to her neck and collarbone. She felt her inner desire growing by every painful kiss Jacob placed on her skin and as his belt hit the floor, Jacob pulled back to push her bra straps off her shoulders and struggled with the clasp on the back. As Jacob’s fingers faltered, Leah got a good look at his abdomen and the muscles protruding his copper skin. 

Leah smirked before reaching back and undoing it herself. “You’re really going to need to know how to get those off someday,” she teased.

“Are you going to give me lessons?” He wasn’t sure where that came from, considering he was far from comfortable with what they were about to do, but she just rolled her eyes at him. The way she looked at him gave him a new kind of confidence. 

Surprising them both, Jacob kissed back down her collarbone and found his lips gravitating toward the flesh on her chest. Leah gasped at the new sensation and she moaned loudly as his tongue played with her. Jacob paid attention to her chest until she squirmed away from him and reached down to unbutton his pants and push them to the ground, boxers quickly following. 

Jacob reached down and lifted her off the table carefully as he removed the last of her undergarments, slipping her black lace panties off as she kicked them somewhere under the workbench. He grabbed a large cloth blanket that he used when he was on the floor of the garage and spread it out clumsily as Leah watched. He laid her back in a somewhat sweeter notion, onto the blanket.

It felt surreal to be naked with Jacob. Naked with anyone! It had been almost two years since she had been intimate with anyone and it had been drastically different, but as Jacob’s body lined up with her own and she felt him, she couldn’t stifle the moan that escaped her lips. Surely, if there was anyone close-by they would be caught, so she tried to stay quiet but as her body expanded to his own, she felt the familiar twinge of pain and idly squirmed against his hips to push him in further, her body adjusting to his.

First time or not, sex was a pretty primal instinct and Jacob had figured it out quickly. As their bodies came together, Leah moaned, and he choked back his own groan of pleasure. He felt her squirm against his hips and paused, pulling back to look at her face. Leah met his gaze, giving Jacob the go-ahead and he was so glad that she didn’t tell him to stop; they were way past the point of no return. Jacob pushed further until he felt his entire lower half emerged in some sort of amazing bliss. Ohh, why had he waited this long to do this!?

Leah felt Jacob start moving inside of her and his lips crashed down on hers, capturing the sound of the sweet moans escaping both of their lips. She moved her hips against his and felt like she was going to completely come undone as their pace quickened. He lost track of all time as they merged into one, time standing still.

“Oh, Fuck,” Jacob groaned as he felt his body growing close. He didn’t want this feeling to ever end.

Leah felt her entire body growing tense and her core was throbbing; she needed to release her pent-up energy and her body was ready for the exercise. She pulled her hips away from Jacob, which got her an irritated groan from the male wolf. “Leah, what the—“

“Roll over,” she instructed. Sam always liked it when she was on top and it was a pretty empowering feeling. She wanted to give Jacob the full sex experience, but with his quick movements it was easy to forget it was his first time.

Jacob raised a brow but obliged and fell onto his back as she straddled his hips, chest against chest. She leaned down to kiss him and Jacob’s tongue immediately slipped into her mouth and he gripped her hips as they came down on his own, their bodies coming back together which caused him to be the one to fill the room with his own moan. Leah moved her hips against his slowly but couldn’t maintain the slow movement as her body cried out for more. She pulled back and put her hands on Jacob’s chest, her hips able to make faster movements on his and Jacob watched the she wolf in amazement, his fingers digging into the flesh on her hips.

Suddenly, he felt as though nothing else in the entire planet mattered, and he was completely captivated. Sex was amazing! Jacob felt his body’s release coming and although he wanted to experience it, he regretted not being able to hold on any longer. Only seconds later, the she wolf cried out and Jacob’s eyes opened. Her body tightened on his and she ended up back on his chest. His own body decided enough was enough and he groaned as he, too, found new heights. He kept moving inside of her, causing small gasps of pleasure to emerge from Leah’s lips. They stayed together for a long moment before Leah slipped her hips up off him and rolled to the side. Her head was on his chest and they were both coated with sweat, trying to catch their breath. He could have done that all night and by the moans escaping his she wolf’s lips, he figured she could say the same. 

They were speechless for a few, long moments, neither knowing how to follow what had just happened, but finally, Leah spoke up. “I should probably go.” 

Jacob looked over to her as she rolled off his chest, propping himself up on his elbow. “Are you okay?”

“Contrary to popular belief, I have had sex before,” she tried to joke as she reached over to grab her dress and bra. Her fingers quickly clasped her bra before she threw her dress over her head, which was still slightly spinning from their activities, and the alcohol quickly burning off in her system. 

Jacob rolled his eyes and fell back onto his back after grabbing his boxers and slipping them on. “I’m well aware; I’ve seen yours and Sam’s thoughts, remember?”

Sam’s name caused a chill to go down her spine. She wasn’t his anymore. He wasn’t the last one to touch her body. When she thought about their time together, now, she would remember tonight, with Jacob, not the last time in her bedroom the morning of the day that Sam fell in love with another woman. She really took into consideration what they just did as the ache between her legs dulled.

“C’mon, Lee, it was a joke,” Jacob said, sensing her change of mood.

“It’s fine,” she said strongly, meeting his gaze very briefly. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Jacob felt exhausted, and he nodded, knowing she had slammed her walls back up – just after he completely destroyed them. “Alright, see you tomorrow.”


	5. Friends with Benefits

The best way to describe how Leah felt going into today’s meeting was awkward. When she got out of bed, she felt the compulsive need to jump directly into the shower. Jacob’s scent on her body was intoxicating and all she could smell. Her sheets would have to be washed, too. Thankfully, she didn’t suffer any hangover effects, but her mind was certainly foggy from last night - not from the alcohol, but from what she remembered so vividly. 

She scrubbed her skin until she was satisfied that she would no longer smell Jacob’s linger scent - especially considering a bunch of wolves with heightened senses were about to start making their way over to her house for the meeting. She was sure that if she hadn’t showered everyone in a close proximity would be able to smell him off of her. Paul usually always had a hint of Rachel’s perfume on him – not traceable to a human’s nose, but easily identifiable to them. Likewise, Jared always smelled of Kim’s kiwi shampoo. 

These little details were so easily picked up by the wolves and it would be painfully easy for them to pick up the smell of sex – a wolf feature that was unpleasant for all involved if a shower wasn’t allotted for before phasing. The only reason she even though of such a small detail was both because of her own heightened nose and because of the recurring awkwardness if her and Sam had to phase together after he was with Emily. 

She idly hoped Jacob woke up early enough to shower, because if not this day would be much more interesting than any of them originally anticipated. They couldn’t get away with it in such close quarters. Drying off and throwing on a loose-fitting floral print dress over her small but muscular frame, she went downstairs where she could already smell her mom cooking breakfast, her stomach growling loudly in response.

Sue smiled over her shoulder at her daughter as she worked on the stove, Charlie helping by scrubbing dishes. 

“Good morning,” Charlie greeted the older Clearwater child. Leah knew he was constantly trying to win her affection.

Leah gave him a friendly smile to avoid too much of a conversation as her mom flipped the eggs in the pan and turned to lean against the counter while the other side cooked. “You were out late last night, everything okay?”

Sue didn’t question Leah very much, especially knowing her daughter was reaching her mid-twenties and the only reason she was still stuck living at home was because she couldn’t leave. But with the wedding last night, Leah guessed her mother’s concern wasn’t completely unfounded this time. “I’m fine,” she lied. “Really, I think you were right with the whole closure thing. Kind of useless to be heartsick over a married man, don’t you think?” Her tone was supposed to be light; flippant, but there was still a sickness coating her words because that was exactly Leah’s problem. 

Sue narrowed her eyes inquisitively at her daughter, but Charlie was the one who responded. “We love who we love, Leah,” he said wisely, turning to snake an arm around her mother. Leah fought the urge to roll her eyes, but Sue melted into Charlie’s side quite happily and at that moment, Leah couldn’t deny the true feelings between the two – whether she wanted it that way or not. 

“Well,” Leah said nonchalantly, leaning in the door frame between the kitchen and the large living/dining room split. “Sometimes that really sucks.”

“After Bella’s mom left,” Charlie started. “I had a very difficult time adjusting. First, to her being absent, of course, and trying to be a dad in a broken family, but also because I couldn’t look anywhere in that house without seeing Renee. Oh, and of course, as your mother has so kindly pointed out, I had to try and learn to survive by feeding myself; something that apparently, I still need some improvement on. So, I definitely get it sucking.” Sue was the first woman to make his heart smile since Renee left. 

Leah had to admit, Charlie tried, which was all she could really ask for. At least he cared about what she and Seth thought enough to make the effort. Plus, she never really thought of him as someone who had his heart broken before now; someone relatable. She gave him a warm smile, trying to come around to the idea of someone else with her mother. After all, her dad was dead because of her and her mom deserved to be happy. “I’m glad you found my mom and kept her company when Seth and I were gone,” Leah said honestly. “And that she’s teaching you how to feed yourself because that’s a pretty essential life-skill.”

Sue smiled thankfully at her daughter. All she asked from Leah was to try and accept someone new in her life. She knew Leah had a hard time trusting anyone since Sam, and she could assume Charlie’s presence also made her uneasy because her daughter still harbored such passionate feelings about Harry’s death.

The first time Leah told Sue that it had been her fault Harry had passed away, Sue’s heart almost shattered seeing the pain in her eyes. She would never blame Leah, and she truly believed it wasn’t her daughter’s fault despite what Leah kept telling herself. “Where were you last night? I thought you and Jacob left to go home early,” Sue commented. “But by the time I got home, Seth was already in bed and you weren’t home.” She had to admit she had been worried about her daughter, especially knowing how the wedding would affect her.

“Me and Jacob ended up staying out late and just catching up,” Leah lied easily. “I didn’t want to wake you when I got home.”

Sue nodded, “Billy said you guys have gotten pretty close.”

Charlie called out to Sue for some help as soon as the front door opened and Jacob and Billy came inside. She didn’t know they were coming over early. Well, Jacob told her that originally, he was supposed to in order to ask her about being his Beta – which she was sure he now would happily recant after last night, but she assumed he had no reason to come over early, now. She had a feeling it was Billy’s idea and he was probably very excited to see his son claim his rightful title. 

Sue greeted the two newcomers happily in passing to rescue Charlie from whatever kitchen nightmare awaited and as Jacob came inside, Seth put his game away happy to entertain Jacob before the other guys came over. Just looking at Jacob, Leah felt everything come back to her from last night. The way his arms held her, the strength of his hands, the chiseled muscles of his chest and back. Leah gulped back her thoughts, wondering where they came from. It’s not like she ever noticed him before now; not in that way and now it was all she could see past those brown eyes. Leah dropped her gaze, but as Jacob brushed Seth off and Billy followed Sue into the kitchen, he came right over to her.

“We need to talk,” Jacob said softly, nodding toward the door.

“Listen, if you don’t want me to be your Beta anymore, I get it - “ she whispered. 

Jacob’s brow furrowed. “What? No, just come on,” he started making his way toward the door and Leah felt some kind of solace in the thought of keeping her second-in-command status, if not only to bug Paul. 

The two wolves went outside and disappeared into the brush at the side of the house. Leah leaned against a tree and Jacob turned to face her. “What do I owe this pleasure, Mr. Alpha?” She tried to maintain her resolve, but she was a little unnerved.

Jacob fought the urge to notice her full lips and the way her dress – although covering everything necessary, was short and just brushed the top of her breasts. What the fuck was wrong with him? It was easy to blame everything last night on the alcohol, but he was very sober now – and imprinted! He cleared his throat, running a hand through his hair as Leah waited very impatiently. “Last night,” he said finally. “It stays between us.”

“Is that all you hauled me out here for?” She asked, crossing her arms over her chest. “I could have gotten some grub before everyone else got here-”

Jacob cut her off, “Leah this is serious-“

“You think I want people knowing about last night?” She asked curtly, placing one hand on her hip. “It’s embarrassing enough leaving the wedding after sobbing against the groom,” she said tightly. “But I really don’t need the guys thinking about my rebound afterwards, too.”

Rebound, ah, so that’s what she was going with. Jacob smirked, “I think you would take great satisfaction, actually, in Sam knowing you managed to squirm your way into my bed.” 

“Figuratively speaking, of course,” she said in response to his statement. “I don’t think you can count your garage floor as a bed unless Billy enjoys torturing you and I seem to remember last night as very two-sided.” 

Jacob narrowed his eyes at her, why did he choose her as his Beta again? She was so stubborn! “Whatever last night was,” he said sternly, stepping closer to her to close the distance between them as he lowered his voice. “Was some fucked-up one-time thing.”

“Agreed,” Leah said flippantly, looking up into his eyes, refusing to back down. “We wouldn’t want Paul thinking I managed to get the Beta spot by climbing into all of the wrong positions, huh?” There was something so sexy about Leah’s bitchiness, which Jacob hadn’t realized until then. She loved to challenge him, and he loved the challenge. He took a deep breath in but being so close to her ensured her smell wafted straight into his nose. But of course, she didn’t stop there. “I really did you a favor, you know, opening you up to the world of sex.”

“Is that so?” Jacob couldn’t help but to smirk at her new confidence. He could tell by her posture and the way she continually looked around their surroundings instead of at him that she was nervous, but she wouldn’t admit it.

“Welcome to adulthood, Mr. Black.”

Jacob shook his head, studying her closely. She was a force to be reckoned with, that was for sure. “Well I would say thanks but, I’m not really sure how thankful I am to be constantly reminded of me screwing up my imprint - and screwing my beta. Plus trying to hide it from the guys isn’t going to be easy.”

“Because I’m so unforgettable?” Leah teased. 

“Cockiness suits you.”

“Just trying to ensure you that it wasn’t all you last night – for your ego, you know. We don’t need that getting any bigger now that you’re taking Sam’s spot.”

“Sam’s spot, Sam’s ex-girlfriend,” Jacob said, realizing the words came out a little more crude than he meant them as the corner of her mouth twitched.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to tell anyone about last night - even if I do think Sam’s face may actually be worth the sacrifice of dignity.” 

Jacob shook his head, “Sam may possibly try to beat the crap out of me; we may end up battling to the death for the Alpha title after all.”

”You’d win,” Leah said easily. 

Jacob hadn’t expected the gesture of good faith and he raised a brow in response. “Oh?”

”You’re the rightful Alpha after all,” she said as though it wasn’t obvious. “Happy birthday, by the way – I would have gotten you something but figured finally un-virginizing you was a gift enough,” she smirked. 

Oddly enough, Jacob had been expecting a response that would stroke his (hurting) ego. Jacob rolled his eyes, “Well, thanks for remembering – but I expect a real gift.”

“Do you now?” She challenged. “I’ll have to see if I can whip something up on such short notice.”

It was strange that finally having sex made him question everything in his entire life - but it hadn’t been with the one person that the Gods had chosen for him. He had chosen it himself, which both surprised him and made him ultra-aware of his betrayal to Nessie. ”Come on, let’s get back inside before the others start getting here.”

Leah nodded and started walking toward the house, ”Don’t want them to think you’re back here tearing my clothes off, after all.”

”Don’t tempt me.” He called after her, deciding two could play at that game. He followed her back to the house and slipped into the back door.

Leah tried to hide the goose bumps she got on her arms at his words; her body wanted him to tear her clothes off again, just for the physical response he could evoke from her. Her mind on the other hand, was in shambles about last night. Thankfully, this morning had gone better than she expected - at least so far.

When they got back, the house was half-full of the others. Sam and Emily still weren’t there yet and Jacob idly hoped Sam hadn’t backed down from offering up his title. At this point, he would fight him for it. He had thought a lot the last week about how he wanted to run the pack and he had a few improvements to implement for the younger members now that the vampire threat seemed minimal enough. He wasn’t backing down from his true destiny anymore - Sam had his fun, now it was time to bring the wolves together again.

Leah hit the bathroom to splash some cold water on her face before joining the others -- but not before grabbing a handful of hash browns from the kitchen when her mom’s back was turned. She was starving! Just as Leah entered the living room, everyone had arrived. Sam and Emily slipped through the door and were greeted by the other wolves hollering and taunting them about their first night as man and wife. It was hard to hear, but Leah thought back to her own night and felt oddly snide about it, which lessened the blow. Sam caught her eye as he tried to get the guys to quiet down, and Leah pointedly looked away. She was done dealing with her feelings for Sam head-on. Jacob was going to be the reigning Alpha, so maybe it would really be time to pretend as though Sam Uley didn’t exist.

”Breakfast is ready!” Sue called from the kitchen.

Everyone made their way to get some grub before digging into the real reason of their gathering and Leah made sure her stomach wasn’t growling as she piled eggs, sausages, toast, and bacon on her plate. Thank God for her frozen metabolism with her wolf-hunger. They all made idle chit-chat, mostly about the night before, and Leah observed silently from her seat on the bar stool in the kitchen beside Seth. She couldn’t wait to see the look on Paul’s face when Jacob announced her as Beta.

”You’re pretty cheerful this morning,” her brother mentioned between stuffing his face.

Leah tried to blame it on the impending one-up she was about to get on Paul, but she knew the real reason that she was more relaxed had nothing to do with pack status. “Just trying to be more positive.”

”Cut the crap,” Seth snorted. “Where were you last night? Jake said you were going with him-”

Leah elbowed Seth causing Seth dropped the egg he was balancing on his fork onto the counter. she didn’t want anyone to overhear that they left together. “Hey! Leah! What the-”

”Sorry little brother,” she said quickly as they drew some attention. No one heard Seth, mostly because with everyone in such a small space there was way too much chatter to pay much attention to anything but the person they were talking to. “We hung out down by the beach for a bit. I didn’t want to come straight home, I needed to cool off.” Okay, well, part of that was right - she did have to blow off some steam.

Being in the same room as Jacob right now had her increasingly aware of his movements. If Jacob was right about one thing, it was that this would be difficult to keep under wraps. Especially when the lingering feelings of last night were continually rearing their ugly head. Until their encounter the night before, Jacob wasn’t on her radar for physical attraction but now, she noticed things that she hadn’t before.

Seth nodded, stabbing the fallen egg with his fork and shoving it into his mouth. “Are you okay?” he asked seriously. “I mean… you seemed fine last night until-”

”I’m am fine,” she said strongly, giving him a reassuring half-smile. “Now eat your breakfast.”

”I gave Jared the heads-up,” Sam said quietly to Jacob in the corner of the kitchen. “He understands the transition of power. Are you positive on Leah?”

Jacob nodded, shoving a hash brown into his mouth. “Absolutely.”

Sam nodded, “Alright, Alpha. Ready to get this started?”

”You mean ready to get this over with so you can go on your already?” Jacob smirked.

Sam laughed, “I don’t remember the last time I spent with Emily where pack business wasn’t in the forefront of my mind, so yes, I can’t wait to get away with her for a little while. If you need me-”

”We won’t,” Jacob promised. “Enjoy your honeymoon, I got it from here.”

”Leah?” Emily approached behind Leah on the bar stool. “Can we talk?”

Unfortunately, Leah just finished the last of what was on her plate, so she didn’t have a good excuse as to why she didn’t want to talk to Emily. She nodded and followed her out back on the porch. Emily looked out over the railing to the greenery in the backyard where they used to play in a treehouse that Harry had built for the girls all those years ago. They had tea parties, played on the trampoline, jumped through the sprinkler, and gossiped about boys. Now, they were like strangers. 

Emily saw the hurt she caused Leah when she and Sam first got together, but she hadn’t realized the feelings Leah had harbored deep down for so long until last night. She hadn’t just hurt Leah; she really had broken her. The guys didn’t talk about Leah around her, for good reasoning, so she was immune to the depths of Leah’s true misery. She assumed she was being sheltered from it by Sam, because she saw the look on her now husbands face many times when Leah turned away from him, as though he would never forgive himself. Now she understood entirely. 

”I’m sorry-”

”Emily, honestly, I’m done,” Leah said, cutting her off. “I can’t take your sorry’s anymore, yours or Sam’s, so if that’s all, I’d like to get back inside.”

”I wish you had this life,” Emily choked out, feeling tears spring to her eyes immediately. “I wish so badly I could give it back, Leah.”

Leah was clearly surprised at her old friend’s words and her brow furrowed as she looked at Emily, unsure of what to say. ”How can you say that, Emily? You’re married to who we both know is an incredible man. You’ll have kids together, a family, and-”

”And I’m living your life. Do you think I don’t know that? Do you really think when I walked down that aisle and seen him at the end that I didn’t think it should have been you? That when he proposed I didn’t think of every single way you envisioned it? That when we moved in together, I didn’t think of the perfect little house you guys wanted? I heard every piece of your happy ending and it fell into my lap whether I wanted it or not.”

Oh, today had been going well – too well. She should have anticipated something messing it up. Leah took a deep breath in, trying to keep a clear head. “You need to give me time.”

”That’s all we have given you,” Emily cried, tears visible in her eyes, threatening to spill over. “I’ll give you as much more as you want, but Lee… no amount of time is going to change that you’re always going to hate me for taking this from you - and I never, ever would have done it willingly.”

Leah had come to terms with the end of their friendship, but she hadn’t realized how tightly Emily had been holding onto hope of some crazy reconciliation until now. Could she ever forgive her? The answer right now, the day after the wedding as she remembered the pain she had been in, forcing her into Jacob’s arms to feel anything but… well, the answer right now was no, and she had no idea if that would ever change. “I know,” Leah said finally. “I know you didn’t ask for it, I didn’t say you did. But it doesn’t matter whether you chose it or not, Emily. When I look at you all I see is someone who was supposed to be my friend - someone that stole my future.” The words were cruel, and the hurt in Emily’s eyes confirmed it, but Leah’s heart broke open last night, and she was still trying to pull it back shut.

”Well, when I look at you, all I see is my best friend, whether you want to be or not,” Emily said strongly, the dampness accumulated in her water line spilling down her cheeks as she wiped her tears away quickly. “And I know we can get back there.”

”Emily,” Leah cried. “What do I have to say to you? Honestly? I can’t be the person I was for you. Not now, and probably not ever. I’m not that girl anymore.”

”No, you’re not,” Emily agreed. “But you’re still my best friend.”

She just didn’t get it! “I don’t hate you, I could never hate you, and I want you to know that I’m not saying this from an angry or broken place, I’m saying it because I’m at the end of a very long leash and I can’t keep pulling on it to try to break-free. I’m stuck here, in La Push, in Jacob’s pack, so I need to clear the air around here and stop pretending, but that means putting what’s left of our friendship to bed, Emily. You’re a constant reminder that I have nothing left. As much as I love you, I can’t fight for this relationship anymore.”

”Well I’ll fight for the both of us,” she argued, trying to will Leah to understand how badly her own heart was breaking at the loss of her best friend. She wouldn’t let her walk away - she saw last night how much she cared, and Emily wasn’t going to let her write her off that easily. It was such a whirlwind the last two weeks. The baby growing in her stomach was another reminder of her betrayal of Leah - one she didn’t even know about yet. She probably would never forgive her, but Emily couldn’t stop trying. The guilt she felt from the very first moment Sam told her he wanted to be with her, to now, married and with a baby on the way, had only grown and she would be lying if her own guilt hadn’t been causing a wedge between her and her new husband. Sam was amazing and understood, but Leah always loomed over them – even when they found out about the pregnancy since they knew they had to tell Leah. It was hard to be happy, but Leah’s misfortune in all of this was insurmountable.

”Can we please go inside?” Leah asked, Emily having fallen silent and Leah not having a response to Emily’s words.

Seth was worried. He could see the tears in Emily’s eyes from his angle against the window that overlooked the patio and he could see the confliction in Leah’s face. He got up off his stool as the guys were all finishing up their second plate, and he opened the patio door, stepping out. “Leah, is everything okay?”

”Fine,” she said softly. “I’ll be in in a minute, okay?”

Seth was apprehensive, but he nodded. “Emily?”

”Fine,” she lied, forcing a smile. “Just give us another minute?”

Seth nodded and went back inside before Emily spoke again. ”What’s done is done, but Leah… if I could give it all back, I would. I love you, and I want you to be happy and I hate that I’m the reason you’re not.”

”I hate it too, but don’t give me that crap. You leave in what, an hour, for your honeymoon. Your wedding was everything you always wanted. I know you’re in love with him, too, so don’t pretend like my feelings change that.”

Emily reached out to take Leah’s hand. “I love him too, of course, but he was always yours and I’m not blind - there is a part of him that will always wish that he still was.” A part she had long accepted but still nagged at her sometimes – especially now that they were married and having a baby.

Sam’s words came back to her: I will always love you. She felt all of the light from being with Jacob the night before fade, bringing her back, face-to-face with her broken heart.

”A very small, insignificant part. You have him, okay? You won, you got your fairy tale ending, so please just take it, stop apologizing, and let me deal with this whatever way I see fit.” She pulled her hand back, wanting more than anything for Emily to listen to her for once about this. 

Emily nodded, knowing there was nothing more she could say, and as Leah turned on her heel and went inside, Emily stayed on the porch for another couple of minutes to blink away the remainder of the tears and get herself together before going back inside. Emily re-entered as Sue was clearing up the dishes and although Leah was craving seconds, she decided to take whatever was left over as a second breakfast for later. They all piled into the living room and Leah sat on the arm of the couch by Rachel who took her hand and squeezed it in a comforting gesture.

Jacob and Sam stood up in front of the room, the wolves finally quiet for once in their lives, and Sam took a deep breath in before starting. “So, obviously it’s been the number one question around here since after the volturi battle on what is going to happen with both of the packs. Two things are for sure; there can’t be two Alphas and we’re better together than we are apart.”

Jacob nodded, picking up where Sam left off. “With the vampire threat significantly diminished for now, we have decided on the course of action that needs to be taken from here.”

Leah had never heard the room full of her pack-mates so damn quiet, but Sam’s voice rung through the silence. “I will be stepping down as Alpha effective immediately.”

That got the noise level in the room rising! Paul was they didn’t expect Sam to give in against losing the Alpha title. All Leah could make sense of as the wolves started expressing their views was: “What the Hell!” “No way!” “

”Okay, okay,” Sam put his hands up, trying to overpower the noise in the room. “Listen - Emily and I are married now, and with that comes a responsibility to be a better husband. Right now, I’m gone more than I am home. I patrol late into the night and leave her by herself; I don’t want to do that anymore. It’s been no secret that with the increasing numbers it’s been very difficult to keep everything straight. Jacob is more than capable to fill my shoes. I want you to embrace him as the new Alpha - and I’ll still be around doing my part, but I just don’t want to struggle with the responsibility anymore at this point. I have other things to tend to now.” Sam reached out and took Emily’s hand, pulling her up from where she sat on the couch and to his side. Leah resisted the urge to roll her eyes.

”So what does this mean?” Seth asked, the other guys staying silent for now to try and process the depth of the leadership change and what that meant for them.

”I’m taking over,” Jacob said easily. “And I’ve got a lot of things I want to do with the pack now that the threat to us doesn’t seem immediate. I have a lot of ideas and I hope they will only make us stronger; but I need you guys to be on board with this.”

”I’m in!” Embry said happily, evoking the same response from Quil. They were so excited to see Jacob take his rightful spot! His best friends show of emotion caused the others to begrudgingly agree - not that they had much of a choice, but Sam’s disciples were definitely unhappy to see him stepping down.

”With the Alpha title comes a big responsibility,” Sam said in response. “And some of that responsibility is to chose a Beta that suits the Alpha and will be able to back them up and support them. Jacob needs to decide who that is for himself. Have you decided?”

”I have,” Jacob said finally, looking over the faces in the room. Embry and Quil looked like they were about to battle for the title themselves, Jared seemed disappointed he wasn’t going to be second-in-command anymore, and everyone else was waiting with anticipation. When his eyes fell on Leah, he took a deep breath in. “I’ve chosen Leah as my Beta.”

That brought on a whole new wave of noise. As expected, some of the guys didn’t want to listen to her, the others were just shocked and unsure of why he didn’t chose someone more fitting.

”Okay,” Jacob said finally, silencing everyone in the room. “Leah? Come here.”

Leah got up from her spot on the couch and went beside Jacob, facing the rest of the guys.

”When everyone was against me and Bella, Leah was there. She stayed by me, listened to me, and helped the pack. I chose her because not only did we work well together, but I also think she’s got enough resolve to ensure the pack stays in line. Leah is my choice, and I don’t want to hear anything about that. You will all listen to her in my absence, respect her, and honor my decision.”

”I think it’s great,” Seth pipped up. “I was there in your pack; and I can agree that everything ran smoothly between us all - for the most part.”

The other guys were still unsure, but the chatter stopped and Jared got up, going over to the two in front of the room. He extended his hand to Jacob, and then to Leah. He was demoted, but he understood. “Congratulations.”

When Jared sat down again, Jacob sighed, “I want you all to know I need everyone to easily flow through the transition and keep our pack together. With Sam stepping back, and myself and Leah filling in the gaps until everything starts to go smoothly, I need all of your support. I have decided not to name a third in command - because although I do need a Beta to help me, and be my safe-guard, I want everyone to know they’re equally as important. If the time comes and I am absent for any reason, Leah will step up and then she can choose who she sees fit to lead with her.”

The trust Jacob was putting in her as Beta was a little flattering, she had to admit, but she knew she had big shoes to fill - especially with Sam’s pack. “Jake? Can I say something?”

Jacob was a little surprised, but he nodded. “Of course.”

”I know some of you probably don’t understand Jacob’s choice, and you don’t have to because I’m going to make sure to fill the role to the best of my ability and I’ll prove myself if that’s what it takes to gain your respect and your trust. I know I have been… well, a pretty miserable person to be around in the past and I want to apologize for my behavior since joining the pack. It was unwelcome, unnecessary, and childish, so I hope you’ll all give me a second chance and let me prove myself to you.” Leah looked up to Jacob, who smiled. 

”I’m grateful to have you by my side,” Jacob said honestly. Maybe it was the fact that she knew Jacob held a lot of importance in naming her Beta, or because of their night together, but she felt goosebumps rise on her flesh at his words.

The other guys got up and congratulated Jacob and he promised to inform them more on his decisions at a later time - after all, Sam and Emily were eagerly awaiting to go on their honeymoon and he knew they were all still exhausted from being out late the night before - and he was mentally drained from his night.

Sam and Emily left, fending off more questions from the guys about their first night as man and wife. Leah avoided their exit by sneaking back into the kitchen to grab some more bacon. 

”Beta?” Embry came around the corner, into the kitchen. “Well, that was… unexpected. Congrats.”

Leah stuffed a few pieces of crispy bacon into her mouth and have him a small smile. “Thanks, Em.”

”So what did you have to do to bestow that honor? Promise to bow down? I know that wasn’t something Jake took lightly.” He followed suit and grabbed some extra hash browns. 

Leah rolled her eyes. “I guess he just believes in me.”

”I’m only teasing, Leah,” he said honestly. “I think it’s pretty cool. You and Jake seem like a good fit.”

The words made a shiver go up her spine as her mind went to inappropriate places of their bodies fitting together. “Uh, yeah, thanks, we get along… most of the time.”

Embry chuckled, “Well if you ever need any back-up against him, I’m in - any chance to annoy Jake.” 

Leah had to admit, Embry was endearing, but he wasn’t her type. Especially not after the mess she got herself into last night. “I’ll definitely take you up on that.”

”I’m sorry about last night,” Embry said uneasily. 

”What are you talking about?”

”Hounding you about Sam before dinner,” he clarified. 

Leah was thinking a lot about the night before, but not exactly about Embry, and she nodded. “Oh, that, don’t worry about it, seriously. You’re probably right anyways, I need to let it go.” It was easier said than done, but she didn’t really want to get into this with Embry.

”I should get going,” Embry said finally as everyone started clearing out. “Are you coming to Jacob’s birthday the weekend? We’re throwing him a belated surprise party.”

“I’ll think about it. I’m not really sure the patrol schedule right now.”

Embry nodded. “Well, I hope to see you there.” 

With that, another unsolicited visitor popped his head into the kitchen: Paul.

”What do you want?” She asked hastily, not really in the mood for his taunting. Turning over her new leaf kind of bypassed Paul in her mind – they would never be able to get along.

”Can I have a minute? Alone?” Paul looked to Embry, who looked a little uncertain in leaving them alone together. He probably heard about the blow up at the Black’s house the week before.

”I guess,” Leah gave Embry a knowing glance that she would be fine, and he nodded before leaving the kitchen.

”I wanted to apologize,” Paul said, biting back his pride as a result of his future father-in-law’s words. He knew if he would marry Rachel, he had to be a better man - and get along with his future wife’s friends. Leah included. It killed him to try to make peace, mainly because he wasn’t sure Leah wanted peace between them, but with her as Jacob’s new Beta, too, well… he really didn’t have a choice now. Maybe with Sam’s wedding over they could try to start fresh - starting with Leah’s melancholy attitude dissipating toward the newlyweds. “I shouldn’t have baited you at Billy’s-”

”Honestly, Paul, you weren’t the immediate cause of that, so don’t flatter yourself.”

Paul knew this would be impossible. “Well, I still shouldn’t have brought it up. With you as the new Beta and the pack’s merging, we’re going to have to get familiar with one another again and I want to be honest in saying I hope that means with your newfound responsibility, there’s also a newfound clarity.”

”Clarity?” Leah questioned, brow furrowed, arms crossed over her chest. 

She knew Paul wouldn’t back down to her foul mood - not like the others. Honestly? She kind of respected his honestly, even if sometimes she wanted to kill him for it. Paul nodded, leaning against the island in the kitchen. “Yeah: Clarity. If you’re going to be in command when Jake’s not around, I except the Beta to be level-headed and stop torturing the pack. You’re not the only person, as you’re well-aware, who hasn’t had a perfect life. We all have our faults and our flaws, but a pack is supposed to fill in those flaws for each other when we can’t do it alone. Jared’s eye-sight, your speed, we all have something to bring to the table. I’m telling you this, because much like when we followed Sam, I was honest with him, and I will be honest with you, too, whether you like it or not. But the bad blood between us, with your rank in the pack, needs to be put to bed, so I’ll be the first to say we don’t have to like each other, but I will follow you in Jake’s absence. I clearly don’t have a choice and if Jacob thinks you’re the best person to help him run the pack, I have to accept that. Sam isn’t here anymore to be the mediator between us, and I think with his stepping down and them leaving for a couple of weeks, it should ease your transition back to La Push. I hope with your new title, like you said earlier, you’re able to put the past in the past and focus on the pack.”

Leah listened, keeping her mouth shut for once. When he finished, she extended her hand to him. “I couldn’t agree more. Truce?” It took a lot for her not to correct him on a couple of points, but she knew it would get them nowhere. 

Paul, clearly confused by her easily agreeing with him, extended his hand and shook hers. “Congratulations, Leah.” He turned to leave and left Leah alone with her thoughts until her mom entered. 

”My daughter, the Beta,” she said proudly, starting to put the leftover food away. “Your dad would be so proud.”

The words caused an unexpected flow of emotion to fill her chest. She was emotionally exhausted from the night before, but her dad was always a soft spot for her. “You think so?”

”Of course,” Sue stopped, turning to look at her daughter, concern showing in her eyes. “He may not of been crazy about the idea that his kids could become wolves and be in danger, but he would damn-well be proud. Jacob seems to have been good for you.”

Leah smiled, finding comfort in her mom’s words. “The time away was… therapeutic,” she admitted.

Speak of the devil.

”Leah?” Jacob stuck his head in the kitchen. “Paul said you were in here. I need to go over some things with you, you got a minute?”

Leah slipped out of the kitchen and met him in the living room where Seth was grinning ear-to-ear. “You know, my sister is pretty badass, but I would have been a great Beta.”

Jacob smirked, ruffling Seth’s hair. “Don’t I know it, buddy.”

”I guess she’s a good second-best, though,” he joked. 

”Want to go for a walk?” Jacob propositioned, turning to Leah.

She nodded and the two left and began walking through the wooden path on the side of the Clearwater’s house that led to the far side of the beach and the natural whirlpools. “What’s up?” Leah finally broke the silence between them.

”We need to decide on a patrol schedule. It’s likely you and I won’t be patrolling together very often so that we can try to have at least one of us on most shifts.”

”Mhm,” Leah agreed. “So, do you really want my input, because automatically I’m definitely not a fan of Paul or Sam, so they’re all yours.” Her newfound maturity with Paul didn’t fool her - they both had a lot of proving to do and she would still rather just avoid him.

Jacob chuckled and shook his head. “I don’t think us picking our own sides of the pack is the best idea - we’re going to have to mix it up. I know I kept Paul and Sam off your patrol until now, but-”

”Okay,” she sighed, cutting him off. “I’ll take Paul for the team, but you can still have Sam.”

Jacob stopped walking, causing Leah to follow suit. “Are you serious?”

”Does it look like I’m joking?”

Jacob sighed. “Leah, I know there’s a lot of history there… but I don’t want to be mediating between you guys, either.”

”There will be nothing to mediate,” she said strongly, meeting his unwavering gaze. “If you take him.”

Jacob ran his hand through his hair, trying to come to a common ground with her. Every decision they made couldn’t be a fight and he was brought back once again to the night before seeing Leah in Sam’s embrace on the patio – a girl he barely recognized. ”Okay, how about this, you get three decisions as Beta that I can’t argue with - that can be your first, but choose wisely, Clearwater, because I’m not going to bend the rules for you.”

Leah grinned, knowing she had a small win. “You deciding to give me one, let alone three in-arguable decisions is probably your first mistake as Alpha, you know.”

”I’m well aware,” he said begrudgingly as he started walking again. Leah matched his pace and followed him further into the woods, finding the smell of the trees and grass familiar and comforting. The wind whistling through the trees calmed her. There was no snow on the ground now, but it was still damp and chilly out.

”Can my second decision be that you have to bring me cake every time you relieve me from patrol?” She asked teasingly. 

”Despite my ineptitude to bake,” he returned playfully. “I think you better save number two and three for something really good.”

”Cake is really good.”

”You’re not getting cake,” he said, rolling his eyes.

“Do you need me to provide you with the definition of ‘in-arguable’, Jake?”

He looked at her and smirked, “In-arguable decisions that aren’t completely insane.” 

”So keeping Sam away from me is sane but cake isn’t?”

”Actually, keeping you and Sam apart may be best for everyone involved, now that I think about it. Cake only serves your needs.”

Leah was trying to hide the grin pulling at the corners of her lips, so she sighed dramatically. “You didn’t say my decisions had to be pack-improving, only that I get two more, so cake is still in the running. Wait - what about McDonalds?”

He chuckled, feeling comfortable talking to her like this – like before, in his pack, but he had to get her back on track. ”We also need to figure out a patrol schedule that allows the younger members time to go to school. With the threat lowered, they really don’t need to be missing classes to patrol.”

Leah nodded, “Agreed. I really want Seth to graduate, after all.”

”At least that one was easy,” he teased.

They reached the whirlpools and Leah sat down, leaning back on her arms as she let her toes sink in the water. Jacob was expecting more of an argument, but apparently, he wasn’t bothering her as much as usual. “You’re welcome.”

”So modest,” he mumbled. “Are you going to sit there all day?”

”Do we really need to keep walking? We’re talking fine here and I’m tired.”

”Late night, Clearwater?” He smirked.

Leah looked up at him from under her lashes and narrowed her eyes. “Some jerk had me up most of the night and wouldn’t leave me alone even though I continually told him to go away.”

”Sounds like you had a good night, then.”

”It wasn’t terrible,” she grinned. 

Jacob smiled, “Your speech back at the house was admirable, I have to say. Really trying to win over Sam’s pack, huh?”

”Well, you did say I was less annoying than Paul,” she reminded him. “So, I figured it was time that they respect me instead of trying to avoid me, if I’m going to be your second in command.”

Jacob sat beside her, keeping a comfortable distance. “Well, I hope your olive branch for peace wasn’t just a tactical move.”

She shook her head, “I kind of miss not being a miserable bitch.”

“I think we can all agree to that.”

A comfortable silence came over them, but as Jacob studied the whirlpools, he wondered if this was where she came for peace. “Do you come here a lot?”

”Really, Jake? A bar pick-up line? I really thought you were better than that.”

He couldn’t help but to chuckle at her, “I meant to the whirlpools, smart-ass.”

Leah shrugged, “Sometimes. I find them relaxing. Now, can the rest of our decisions wait until I’ve had more than a few hours of sleep? I can barely think straight.”

Jacob knew the feeling. “Fine, let’s go back.”

”I’m going to stay here for a bit.”

Jacob started to get up, but paused. “I thought you wanted to sleep?”

”I said I was too tired to think about this stuff right now, not that I wanted to go home. We’re using Sam’s patrol schedule in the meantime anyways, there’s no reason we have to do this after too much alcohol and lack of sleep, we’ll just screw it up.”

”Speak for yourself, Clearwater, I feel fine.” 

She smirked. “Well I’m glad sleep deprivation makes you more alert. Or was it just the sex?”

It was the elephant in the room between them and would be for a while. “I guess my late-night just made me more focused and alert.”

”I get it, when I lost my virginity, I was pretty high on cloud-nine, too. Granted it was years ago,” she teased. She could barely believe that she had taken Jacob Black’s virginity. The thought felt foreign, but thinking back to the night before, he hadn’t seemed too unfamiliar with the act. His confidence from being alpha transpired into all aspects of life and thinking back caused her cheeks to flush slightly.   
Jacob smirked, “Funny.”

”Again, you’re welcome. At least it won’t be awkward now when Nessie is old enough.”

He groaned,” How about we don’t bring Nessie up right now?”

”Sore subject? What happened, did you two have your first lovers quarrel?”

Jacob sighed and avoided her gaze. “Betraying my imprint wasn’t exactly my finest moment.”

It took her a second to realize he meant what they had done. “Well, she’s not of-age yet to have any idea about sex, so I think you’re safe.”

”That’s what I keep telling myself, anyways.”

”She’ll understand, it’s not like you’re together yet. What happens before you two are a couple isn’t something she can really fault you for.”

Jacob sighed and met her gaze, “I know, I just… don’t understand why my imprint is different.”

”Different?”

”Quil is ready to wait for Claire for the next eighteen years if need be and I can’t wait, what, a few weeks… months?”

”Quil’s imprint is extremely unfortunate,” she said easily. “And just because we slept together once doesn’t mean your imprint’s inadequate.” She wasn’t sure why she was trying to make him feel better about his imprint – it was an imprint, for heaven’s sake. It was meant to be, written in the stars, all that crap. Once Renesmee was old enough, they, too, would have the nauseatingly perfect imprint and she would probably still be alone.

”You’re too level-headed about the fact that we slept together,” he replied.

Leah rolled her eyes, looking over to meet his. “What do you want me to say? It’s… awkward at best for the both of us after last night.”

“Awkward because you keep thinking about it or because you keep trying to pretend as though it didn’t happen?”

There was something intoxicating in his eyes – her brow furrowed, not really knowing how to respond. “Because you’re the alpha and I’m the beta of the same pack with my ex-boyfriend and all of our friends, and we were drunk and stupid.”

“I think we’re both pretty aware that we were far from wasted,” Jacob pointed out, turning his attention back to the whirlpools.

“I don’t know about you,” Leah mused. “But I was pretty drunk-“

Jacob turned back to her, rolling his eyes. “Drunk enough that you can sit there and tell me that you didn’t know what you were doing? You seemed pretty aware to me.”

“What do you want me to say?” She asked, annoyed at his laser-focus on their night together. She had thought of sex much differently with Sam, but what happened with Jacob was just… well, a mistake, right? 

“Well if you want to play it off to alcohol being the one and only catalyst, fine-“

“Hm, catalyst,” Leah smirked. “Big words there, Jakey. I like it.”

“You’re impossible,” he grumbled. “Just because you’re, what, four years older than me, you think you’re some kind of professor, huh?”

“I did teach you some things last night,” she taunted back, her smirk lingering on the edge of her lips, trying not to think of the age difference. It was so strange to think that Embry and Jacob were the same age – Embry seemed way too young for her, but Jacob? He had a maturity that most guys his age didn’t have – or maybe she was still just drunk and not thinking clearly.

“Yeah?” Jacob leaned closer to her. “I remember your fingers were the ones fumbling more than mine, ‘Ms. Experienced’, remember?”

Leah felt his breath so close to her, and when she turned her attention away from the swirling water to face him, her breath caught in her throat. “Because I can’t forget about it,” she answered his first question.

Jacob was confused for a moment before he realized what she was referring to, and suddenly, he leaned over and pressed his lips to hers again, with the same, bruising intensity that they had the night before accompanied with stone-cold sobriety. 

Only moments later, Leah forced herself to pull back. “What are we doing? It’s easy to blame last night on alcohol, whether it was or not… but Jake-“

“I have a proposition,” he said softly, his lips still only inches from hers. She met his chocolate gaze, waiting for him to continue, feeling her body responding to him in ways that made her feel like she was sixteen again. “Friends with benefits.”

It took Leah a second to even believe he had said the words, and she hesitated before responding, trying to cover up just how enticing that idea sounded – if last night was any consolation. “We’re barely friends, Jake - let alone with any benefits.” It took her off guard that he would even consider sleeping with her stone-cold sober. It was strange to feel desired again: wanted. 

“Oh, don’t give me that-“

“Are you serious?”

Jake shrugged, “You seem pretty level-headed about the fact that it was ‘just sex’, and I think I speak for both of us when I say last night wasn’t terrible,” he grinned. “What do you think? No emotions, just sex?”

”I would never have emotions for you,” she teased before hesitating. “I mean… I don’t hate the idea.” She was still breathing hard from their kissing, and her cheeks were flushed from the passion between them.

”Just sex,” he agreed. “Until Renesmee is old enough to decide what she wants.”

”Are you using me, Mr. Black?” She teased.

”I mean, or until you find someone,” he taunted. 

“Doubtful, but we’ll see.” She reached her pinky up to him. “No emotions, just sex, until one of us ends it.”

Jacob rolled his eyes at the pinky-promise but wrapped his own around hers. “I guess that means we can agree that we’re friends now.”

They both grinned and it was Leah’s turn to roll her eyes, but they quickly fell into the similar rhythm of the night before, both aware that their actions were wrong, but secluded enough in the woods that it was easy to convince themselves that it felt right and that their new friends with benefits status wasn’t absolutely absurd. Leah’s dress hit the grassy woods floor, and her fingers didn’t fumble this time as his clothes, too, were quickly torn away.


	6. Jeremy

“You’re going to love Jeremy,” Rachel gushed as soon as Leah got in the car with her a couple of days later to go to the dance class she now regretted agreeing to. It was basic dance 101 so it couldn’t be too difficult, but Leah still wished she could have stayed in bed until patrol.

“I thought this was all about self-expressionism and fun?” Leah countered, quirking a brow as she watched Rachel in the driver’s seat.

Rachel shrugged, meeting her eyes briefly before turning her attention back to the road. “I mean, it is. I think it’ll be good for you, but I also think Jeremy would… well, kind of, just maybe-“

“Okay, no,” Leah cut her off quickly. “If this is some set-up, Rachel, I’m really not interested.”

Or was she?

The thought of meeting a nice, normal guy wasn’t lost on her, but… well, she was kind of in a situation sleeping with her alpha, trying to figure out what the Hell to do with the rest of her life, and pointedly trying to avoid her ex. Another man would only complicate things.

“He is really hot?” Rachel supplied, trying to get Leah on board. “Just give him a shot. He’s super nice, you’ll like him.”

“Who says he is looking for anything, or even interested in me?” 

“I mean, I may have showed him a picture of my extremely attractive, single friend-“

“You did what!?”

Rachel laughed nervously, knowing intervening in her friend’s life would be regarded as intrusive, but wanting Leah to find someone. And Jeremy was perfect! “Just keep an open mind, okay?”

Thankfully, it didn’t take long to get to the studio and honestly, as the two life-long friends walked into the dance studio adorned with light blue walls and two walls with full-length mirrors, Leah felt a little nervous. She had stopped dancing a long time ago. The girls changed into a pair of spandex shorts and fitted tank tops before entering the large studio area where only a handful of girls stood. And if the dancing aspect of today wasn’t nerve-wracking enough, knowing she was going to meet a potential suitor thanks to Rachel was overwhelming. Leah hadn’t dated since high school! What was Rachel thinking?

“I told you, small and cozy,” Rachel gave her friend a reassuring smile as they leaned against the back wall. 

The class was made up eleven people, ten women and one man. Still, they took up most of the room in the small studio and she felt a wave claustrophobia overcome her. This was supposed to be fun, right?

Suddenly, as the door opened behind them, Rachel hit Leah’s arm. “That’s Jeremy,” she whispered as the girls went silent. Jeremy – as Rachel had told Leah, was the incredibly hot instructor that started the studio as an entrepreneur for his little sister who loved to dance and was diagnosed with leukemia at age seven. Jeremy didn’t look any older than twenty-seven or twenty-eight – a little older than both girls, so there must have been a huge age gap or maybe a new marriage involved for such a younger sibling. But Rachel had one thing right – he was hot.

A paler complexion than her own, and standing at about 6”2, he had blonde hair and light blue eyes. Leah was so used to staring into brown eyes on the reservation, she had almost forgotten how beautiful the depths of blue could be. She barely realized she was sizing him up until he got in front of everyone and leaned on one of the railings against the large mirrors. He smiled, showing a perfect grin with porcelain, white teeth. He almost looked as perfect as the Cullen’s, she thought idly. Except for the flush of pink in his cheeks that showed he was probably rushing from running five minutes late, and the small wrinkle lines starting beside his eyes. She barely got a chance to take a quick glimpse of his muscular body in his grey sweatpants and black Under Armour t-shirt. 

“Sorry I’m late,” he broke her out of her daze. “I see a couple of new faces, so I want to go around and introduce myself and make sure everyone is comfortable and acquainted. So, my name is Jeremy Collins, I’m twenty-eight years old, and I started this dance studio three years ago with the help of some very close people in my life and I’ve been able to keep it going effortlessly since. In my free time, I like to go to the gym, spend a lot of time outdoors to keep active, and spend time with my family.” He scanned the room before landing on another girl. “Would you like to tell us a little bit about yourself?”

“My name’s Shania, my friend, Ashely and I thought that this would be nice to… spend some quality time together and get some exercise.” Shania had dirty-blond hair, was fair skinned, had a petite frame, and green eyes. Her friend, Ashley, was platinum blond telling Leah there was a little too much bleach involved and had bright blue eyes adorned with way too much eye make-up. Honestly, Leah kind of wished she had paid a little more attention to her appearance now that Rachel had blindsided her. 

She let her eyes flutter over some of the other people in the room, hoping to appear invisible in the introductions. There was a guy who was extremely flamboyant talking to a girl next to him. They appeared to both be sizing Jeremy up, which didn’t surprise her. Three other girls, seemingly friends, were there, listening to Shania’s introduction politely. Leah recognized one of them from the reservation. Her name was Abigail and she had went to school with Leah, albeit a few years younger. Another two girls were up closer to the front and Leah couldn’t make anything out except they were both petite. 

“Well, Shania and Ashley, we’re excited to have you here.” 

Jeremy’s eyes fell on Leah next – apparently, she was the only new one left. “Leah, I presume?”

Oh, Rachel was getting an ear-full after this.

Leah felt like she was back in high school doing this exercise - after all, everyone in La Push either knew her, or knew of her. “Uh, yeah, I’m Leah. I’m from the Quileute reservation and Rachel may have dragged me along.”

Jeremy smiled, “Well, Leah, I’m sure you’ll fit right in. Rachel’s been catching on extremely well, so I’m sure you’ll do just fine.” Leah couldn’t help but to notice how Jeremy’s eyes stayed connected with her own for a moment too long. The captivating blue coloring she noticed before was… well, captivating. This guy would never be attracted to her. He was attractive and successful. How was he single?

Jeremy started class shortly after, but not before Rachel practically squealed and hit her arm. “Am I right or am I right?”

Leah rolled her eyes in response and focused on Jeremy and not looking like a complete idiot as he went over a new dance routine. Surprisingly, Leah’s feet caught on extremely quickly, even with her lack of recent experience with dance. Maybe it was just like riding a bike; once you knew it, you knew it forever.

The class was actually fun and despite Jeremy’s sweet remark about Rachel’s progress, she kept messing up and they would both laugh at each other as Jeremy continued led them all through a couple of easy routines with music.

As the class was coming to an end, and Leah felt a little disappointed. It was easy to pretend to be the new and improved self she claimed to be when she wasn’t in La Push surrounded by people who knew her true colors; she hadn’t expected to feel more normal in this setting than she did at home. Unfortunately for her, before Jeremy dismissed everyone, he called her name. “Leah, can you come up here for a second and help me demonstrate for the class what we’re going to be working on next week?”

Her feet felt planted on the floor, but everyone turned to her and Rachel gave her a little push forward. She nodded, walking up to the front of the class with him.

“I’m teaching ballroom dancing next week,” he said to the class. “I want you to be familiar with all types of dances. Today was just a warm-up for the newcomers and a little more casual than usual, but next week I want to get us back on track with learning about the different dances. Everyone grab a partner.” Jeremy announced happily as Leah joined him. He turned toward her and extended his hand. “May I?”

Maybe the art of romance wasn’t lost on the older Clearwater yet because she felt her heart rate increase immediately as she put her hand in Jeremy’s. Jeremy smiled down at her before he gently pulled her closer, but not too close. He rested his hand on her upper back, just under her arm and brought their other hand, fingers intertwined, up. He led her carefully into the steps of the traditional ball room dance and Leah tried to pretend like she wasn’t extremely nervous. 

Being next to Jeremy allowed her to check out exactly how toned his body was. As he led them through the steps, she noticed the bulge of his arm muscles, his solid frame, and that he smelled like cinnamon. The rest of the class copied their steps with a partner and before he finished, he spun Leah around suavely.

“Great job today everyone,” he called finally, dropping her hand. “Also, I’m hosting a recital in the spring with a bunch of my different classes to promote the studio and the amazing talent we have, so if you’re interested, let me know and we can start training.”

”Let’s do it!” Rachel cried as she appeared next to Leah. 

“Okay, slow down,” Leah smirked, feuding off Rachel’s attempts to sign them up as Jeremy called out to her, the rest of the class heading for the change rooms. 

“Leah? Can I talk to you for a second?” 

Rachel gave her a coy smile. “I’ll wait for you outside.”

Rachel ran off and Leah turned on her heel to face him. They were the only two in the studio and Jeremy was leaning up on the bar against the mirrors again. “Great job today. You seem to be familiar with dance.”

“Thanks,” Leah replied simply. “I did ballet and hip-hop when I was a kid, but I’ve been away from it for years.”

“Well you picked it up quickly,” he smiled. “You should really consider signing up for the recital. I think you’d enjoy it.”

”I’ll think about it,” Leah replied.

”I hope you don’t think this is weird, but Rachel’s told me a lot about you. I was just wondering if you’d like to get some coffee sometime.” She was quiet for a second too long, and he added, “Only if you want to, of course.”

The only thing she knew about him thus far really was a tentative background story, he was incredibly good-looking, and apparently single. “It’s not that I don’t want to,” Leah stated softly. “I just… I don’t really date.” Being a wolf made it very difficult to be able to be with a human if they couldn’t know your secret – she saw that first hand with Sam and Emily and Jacob pining over Bella who at first, was none the wiser of their wolf-status. 

Jeremy shrugged, “Me either, honestly. Rachel’s just talked you up so much that I figured it would be worth a shot to try and get to know you myself.”

“What exactly has my so-called friend told you?” Leah asked curiously.

“Nothing but good things,” he assured her. “I understand if you’re not ready to date, but at least humor me with a coffee – as friends?”

“Sure,” she agreed finally, trying not to think to her and Jacob’s version of ‘friends’.

“Perfect,” he pulled his phone out of his pocket and passed it to her. “Put your number in and I’ll give you a call.” 

Leah took the phone, slightly fuming over Rachel for causing the blush on her cheeks. She entered her number in his phone and passed it back to him. “I work night shifts down on the reservation,” she said idly, covering her patrol schedule. “So, you’re better off not calling at the crack of dawn.”

Jeremy grinned and put the phone back in his pocket. “Well, how about we schedule something now? If you know your schedule, that is.”

Leah hesitated but nodded, deciding it couldn’t hurt. He was attractive and nice so far. “I’m free tomorrow evening.” 

”I’ll pick you up at 6:30?”

”That sounds great, my phone’s in my bag in the change room, but call me tomorrow and I can give you my address.”

Jeremy smiled, “Perfect. I’m looking forward to it.”

She turned on her heel before going to change and meet Rachel outside. “So?” Rachel asked excitedly, leaning against the hood of her car.

Leah shook her head. “Rachel, I do not need a matchmaker. My life is messy enough.”

Rachel giggled, “So you said yes?”

“Not the point—“

“Yay!” Rachel’s smile couldn’t get any bigger, surely.

“Rachel, no, seriously. I can’t be with someone right now, especially with someone I haven’t imprinted on.” The parking lot was empty save for them.

“I told you – just because you haven’t imprinted doesn’t mean you can’t fall in love the normal way.”

“Yeah, I get that,” Leah said bluntly. “That’s what I’m afraid of – falling for someone, then what happens if I imprint?” She couldn’t hurt someone like Sam had hurt her. 

“That is a big what-if, Leah. The more imprinted pack members, the less likely for the remaining ones; you know that as well as I do. Plus, we don’t exactly know what the female wolf anatomy is like for imprinting yet.” It was a nice way for her to say maybe Leah couldn’t without being too blunt. “You can’t live life on what-if’s.”

“I can live cautiously, though.”

”Cautious is boring,” Rachel said strongly. She looked to her watch. “Let’s get you back for patrol.”

The girls left, and Leah was quiet most of the way home. When Rachel dropped her off, her joy was palpable and she had managed to get a brief recap of the conversation with Jeremy from Leah, including their ‘date’ Friday.

”I’ll let you know how it goes,” she promised as she got out of the car and went inside. She threw on a dress she used to phase in and got ready to meet Jacob at the edge of the woods. It was only them patrolling tonight. Generally, patrolling together would be very minimal and if not for Kim being sick, they wouldn’t have been together tonight, either. Jacob was filling in for Jared. Leah felt a little anxious as she met him at the edge of the woods in her backyard, both from the silence since their last interlude at the whirlpools and the images of Jeremy invading her mind; how a part of her had wanted him to pull her closer to him, tight to his frame, and… 

”Hey,” Jacob greeted.

”Hey, what’s the plan?”

”I kind of thought we should talk, first,” Jacob said honestly. 

”Listen,” Leah said, trying to mitigate the conversation. “I was thinking we could just forget about this whole thing and pretend like it never happened. Plus, this entire ‘we need to talk’ thing is getting kind of old. Friends with benefits is insane, especially with the pack’s involvement.”

Jacob hesitated momentarily before speaking, ”Agreed.”

The conversation dropped there and despite having been naked together twice now in an intimate context, they turned to phase, Jacob tying his shorts to his leg and throwing his shirt on the ground and Leah putting her dress in her usual box at the base of her favorite tree before they both exploded into their wolf forms.

”So,” Jacob thought. “How are things?”

”Well, your sister is interfering in my love-life and has forced a date with our dance instructor on me tomorrow,” she thought as she felt the cool air whipping through her fur.

”Has she now?” Jacob asked curiously. 

”I mean, he’s not unattractive, but… I haven’t been on a date in what seems like forever and he seems... well, nice.”

Jacob chortled, “Well that’s the first issue with him - you don’t really do nice.”

”Hey, I’m turning over a new leaf, remember?” She propositioned. 

”That may be easy to believe now that Sam’s away.”

”Let’s not talk about him.” She thought back to her conversation with Emily on the porch, and Jacob was intrigued. 

”I understand that you can’t be friends like you were.”

”I’m glad you do, because she doesn’t seem to understand why we can’t paint each other’s nails and have sleepovers anymore.”

”She’s just… nostalgic. She misses you.”

”Yeah, well I miss her too, doesn’t change anything though.”

He remembered feeling the exact same way with Bella. “Why are you just as stubborn as I am?”

Leah had a wolfy-grin playing on her lips. “I’m not near as stubborn as you.”

The two exchanged some small talk - Jacob gave her an update on Renesmee, she told him a little more about Jeremy, and they patrolled in a comfortable silence. It was like old times, and they both enjoyed how easy it was.

”Almost quitting time!”

”Paul should be here shortly,” he responded. “I think we’re good. No traces. If a vamp crosses the boarder, we’ll know. Let’s change back.”

They both headed back to the Clearwater’s yard and phased back. Leah quickly threw on her dress. She hadn’t noticed before how see-through it was with no undergarments on underneath. When she faced Jacob, he couldn’t help but to notice how it clung loosely to her body - and how under it, she was naked.

He felt his voice catch in his throat, lust overcoming him as it had at the whirlpools. Her hair was messy from patrolling and she put a hand on her hip, brow raised. “What? Do I have a tree branch attached to me or something?”

Jacob knew it was wrong, but he felt it hard to resist the feeling he felt below the belt looking at her. Suddenly, he stepped forward, causing her to push up against the tree behind her. Leah looked up at him, wondering what the fuck he was doing, but as he reached out to place his hands on her thighs, just underneath where the hem of her dress stopped, she knew.

”Feeling adventurous, Clearwater?”

Leah felt it hard to catch her breath with him so close and shirtless. Jacob evoked a completely physical response from her since the wedding - nothing romantic or too intimate, but damn, it had felt good to let out her pent-up energy with him and now he was giving her the opportunity to do it again. And maybe she felt a little overwhelmed from the dance lesson earlier. It was a terrible idea, but well… “Fuck it,” she said easily. “The woods are better than Billy’s garage floor,” she teased.

Jacob leaned in, silencing her, crashing his lips tightly to hers. Leah didn’t stop him as she reached up, letting her hands rest on his shoulders before they instinctively slipped down to feel the muscles adorning his bare chest. Jacob felt the urgency of the situation, knowing Paul would be there soon, and he reached down, lifting Leah up, back against the tree, legs around his waist, and at that moment, Leah was impotent. She felt his manhood pressing through his shorts against her and her body responded accordingly.

As though she was weightless, he supported her with one hand and crashed his lips against hers again, hiking up her dress, and easily pushing his shorts off and to the wooden floor. They came together again, Jacob trying desperately to silence the she wolf’s moans with his mouth; they were right outside her house, and even though it wasn’t visible, it wasn’t exactly the safest place, either. Plus, Paul was probably only minutes away. Hopefully Seth’s hearing was occupied by a video game.

Jacob moved with her and felt the bliss of being inside of her again; their bodies angry for release. Leah felt the bark of the tree digging into her back, probably causing marks, but it felt too good and it too hot being wrapped around Jacob’s waist for her to care. She reached up to grab a nearby branch to help support herself as Jacob leaned in closer, one hand gripping her waist tightly, nails digging in, the other, caressing her most sensitive nerve endings.

Suddenly, moments later, Leah felt her body thrash against his, hitting her own release, and she moaned loudly, surely filling the quiet forest with all the passion she could muster. Jacob kissed her passionately, trying to muffle the amazing noises he evoked from her before he, too, felt his body reach his release and he tried to muffle his own groan in the back of his throat. 

Leah fell against him, their bodies slipped apart before he set her down to her feet. Her body was still coursing with endorphins and she felt a sudden loss at their bodies untangling. Her legs were a little weak and Jacob reached over to grab her arm to steady her. She instinctively reached back, feeling her sore back, and shuddered. 

”What’s wrong?” Jacob asked as he let her go, assuming she was okay on her feet, to pull up his shorts and throw on his shirt, her dress falling back down to an acceptable length on her thighs.

She turned, “How bad is it?”

Jacob looked, not knowing what she was talking about until he saw the scratches up and down her back from being pressed against the tree. They weren’t deep, but surely, she could feel them. ”Shit, Leah, I’m sorry-”

”Is it bleeding?”

He shook his head, “Just scratched up.”

She turned back and shrugged, “I guess it was worth it.”

”I should have been more careful I’m sorry-”

”Stop,” she said easily. “It’s… kind of hot, I guess.”

Jacob smirked, “Are we really doing this? No awkwardness?”

” Well, I guess the third time’s the charm, hey?”

”Do you think it’s going to complicate things too much?”

”Yeah, it’s going to be hard to keep it between us with the wolf telepathy, but I mean… we have so far, right?”

”There’s a very real possibility of others finding out.”

”Not if we’re careful.”

Jacob sighed, “Go before Paul gets here and smells me on you.”

Leah blushed, knowing what he meant. “Alright, I’ll talk to you later.”

Jacob nodded, and Leah ran back into her house, intent on taking a shower before hitting the hay.

Jacob was a little bewildered at what they were doing. Despite his own imprint and his inner man justifying his needs, his wolf felt hurt at his betrayal toward Nessie. It was a constant battle, but… well, the she wolf managed to evoke a fire inside of him. Her fiery attitude and passion translated well into sex well and he couldn’t deny how much she turned him on since the night on his garage floor. If they were going to do this, they had to be very careful, but… he thought it was worth it. Being with her was so easy – uncomplicated. 

Getting ready for her non-date coffee date the next day was weird. Aside from the wedding, Leah hadn’t had to care about her appearance in a long time. She threw on a pair of nice jeans and a cute tank-top she had from back when she was with Sam. She had to put a cardigan over it to keep her human cover in the January weather, but she looked nice. She even managed to put on a little bit of make-up before she heard a horn in her driveway. She looked out her bedroom window, thankful Seth was out with the younger wolves again and her mom was at work to avoid their interrogation of questions. 

Leah saw a black Honda in the driveway and took a deep breath in before throwing her brown leather jacket over her arm and grabbing a small, old purse to throw over her shoulder. She slipped into a pair of black ankle boots before slipping out the door to Jeremy’s car. She got into the passenger side and smiled.

”You look beautiful,” he greeted. 

”Thanks,” she said awkwardly. “You look great, too.” He had on a pair of light-wash jeans with a dark purple button-down that was form fitted to his muscular frame. 

Jeremy pulled out of her driveway and started driving to the local coffee shop. “So, tell me about yourself.”

”Are we in middle school again?” She teased. “Or is this a continuation of your dance class introductions?”

Jeremy chuckled and kept his eyes on the road. “Well, Rachel’s said you’re really nice and funny, so she’s definitely got those right.”

Leah hoped Rachel hadn’t falsely described her to Jeremy. She was… well, a lot of things but nice wasn’t really high up on that list. Funny she could probably live up to, though. “What else has Rachel said about me?”

”Just that I really should get to know you.”

”What do you want to know? My favorite color? It’s blue. What about yours?”

”Yellow,” he smirked. “Favorite food?”

”Hamburgers. And Pizza. You?”

”Steak. Hm. Favorite past-time?”

Turning into a huge dog wasn’t exactly on the acceptable list, and Leah honestly didn’t know what else she did in her past-time anymore. “I like to read, but I haven’t really done a whole lot lately.”

”Because of work? You said you work night-shifts. That must be hard.”

”Uh, yeah, I help my mom out at the hospital. I’m considering maybe going in to do nursing, so she lets me help out with some clerical things in the meantime.” It was a good lie; easily convincing and she really had been looking into nursing, but she hadn’t decided for sure yet. She hated lying to him, but she could hardly tell him the truth.

”That’s great, I mean, it’s an awesome career,” he looked over to her and she nodded. 

”What about you? What did you do before the dance studio?”

Jeremy hesitated, “Some odd jobs. My mom raised my sister and I in a dance studio. As a thirteen year old boy who only wanted to play sports, I used to be embarrassed by it, but I learned to embrace it when Mikayla came along.”

”So you have two sisters?”

Jeremy’s brow furrowed. “Nope, just my older sister, Jamie.”

”I’m sorry, I just… Rachel said Mikayla was your little sister.”

Jeremy chuckled as he pulled into the coffee shop and turned off the car. “Let’s go inside and get a coffee and I can… explain.”

Leah nodded and they went inside, the rain staying at-bay for now. Jeremy got a black coffee and a scone and Leah settled for a latte and muffin. They sat down in a cute corner booth and Jeremy turned to focus his attention on her as the waitress left to get their order. 

”Rachel has it mistaken,” Jeremy said. “I want to be honest with you upfront - Mikayla is my daughter.”

Leah was a little surprised, but nodded. “I’m sorry she… must have assumed by the age gap and knowing you were single…”

”It’s fine, I get brother and uncle all the time, but nope, she’s mine. I… wouldn’t want to get to know you without you being all-knowing about her. She’s my world. But I am single.”

”I appreciate that,” Leah said, playing with the hem of her cardigan. “So… if you don’t mind my asking-”

”I don’t,” Jeremy frowned. “Mikayla’s mom, Mariah passed away due to labor complications. She started hemorrhaging once Mikayla was born and they brought her in for emergency surgery, but they weren’t able to stop the bleeding before it was too late.”

Leah felt terrible for opening her big mouth. “I’m so sorry-”

”Don’t be,” Jeremy said softly. “It was almost eight years ago. I… adapted, and it was and still is heartbreaking, but I’ve managed to come to terms with it. It’s been her and I ever since and she’s a great kid. That’s kind of why I haven’t had the chance to date much. From being a young parent - she wasn’t planned, to a single, young parent who had no clue how to raise a child… well, you learn. When she got sick, we adapted, and now she’s in remission and doing great. She shares my sisters love for dance, so her and I opened the studio for her - and attracted a lot of clientele.”

Leah felt her heart swell a little hearing him talk about his daughter, and she felt the emptiness of her own infertility weighing on her. The waitress came back with their order and Jeremy thanked her.

”I appreciate if having a kid isn’t exactly on your radar for dating options, it isn’t for everyone-”

”No, honestly. It’s… not a determining factor for me. I bet she’s great.”

”Are you sure? I promise I won’t take offense. Honestly, I usually try to date women… well, older than me when I do date so that it is less of an issue. I imagine you’re around Rachel’s age?”

”Same age,” Leah responded easily. 

”I just… I understand if you want to… well, have your own family and not get involved with the complexity of someone else’s.”

Leah shrugged, not really wanting to get into her own possible infertility on a first-date. If that was what this was. “I’ve always wanted a family, so it doesn’t scare me off. I mean, as friends,” she teased, a grin pulling at the corners of her lips as she picked at her muffin. 

Jeremy chuckled, “Well, I’m glad. I honestly just thought Rachel had already told you. I didn’t realize she thought Mikayla was my sister. So, enough about me - tell me about you. Who is Leah Clearwater?”

Leah took a deep breath in. “Rachel really didn’t say anything? I don’t see you as the type to just take dates with random girls.”

He smirked, “I thought this wasn’t a date?”

Leah felt her cheeks flush and she rolled her eyes playfully. “Well, I mean, it’s not, but.”

Jeremy chuckled and shrugged, “Full disclosure - she did say you’ve been through a lot and that she thought we would be a good match, so, with everything finally settling down in my life, I figured trying to get back into dating wouldn’t be the worst idea - or casually hanging out with a friend at a coffee shop.”

”Well, I don’t know where to start.”

”At the beginning?”

”Well, long story very short, I only ever had one long-term relationship before and it ended pretty badly.”

”I can appreciate that. Sometimes relationships kind of suck.”

Leah actually grinned and nodded, “Well now he’s with my old best friend, who’s also my second cousin, and shortly after all that happened, my father passed away, so now I’m here, trying to piece my life back together.” She was rambling, but her past was extremely complex and she wasn’t sure how to describe it well using a human-friendly context. 

”Wait, so your… best friend, is with your ex?”

”They got married last week. I was a bridesmaid,” she said dismally. 

Jeremy raised a brow and took a sip of his coffee. “And you were okay with being a bridesmaid?”

”I mean, I guess I was just trying to make amends.”

”But you didn’t do anything?”

”I wasn’t exactly… very nice when I found out.”

”I think you had every right to not be nice in that situation.”

”Well,” Leah sighed, sipping her latte. “They are currently on their honeymoon, living their happily ever after and I’m learning to live with it.”

”Do you still have feelings for him? Your ex?”

”Full disclosure,” she quoted him from earlier. “There’s still a lot of unrequited feelings, ones I’m still trying to mitigate. But I’m trying to move on with my life.”

”Well,” Jeremy took his cup and lifted it, stretching it out to her. “Here’s to trying to figure out life.”

Leah laughed and picked up her cup, gently hitting it against his. “Cheers to that.”

They talked some more about lighter topics; movies they had watched recently, some more favorite questions, and stayed away from the heavy conversation, and before Leah knew it, three hours had passed. When she checked her phone, Seth had texted her and asked her to call him - and ten missed calls.

”Can you excuse me for a moment?” she asked.

Jeremy nodded and she slipped out the front door, calling her brother.

”Leah, where are you?”

”I’m out with someone from the dance studio, why?”

”Paul had an accident, can you come back? Everyone’s at our place.”

”What’s wrong, is he okay?”

”He will be, mom’s here with him. It’s just a broken leg, but Jacob needs you to help fill in his patrol schedule. He shouldn’t be out for long, but for the rest of the weekend for sure. Mom had to re-break the bone, so he’s on a morphine drip. Rachel’s really upset; it would be good for you to be here with her.”

”Alright, alright, tell them I’m on my way.”

Leah went back inside and grabbed her jacket and purse. “I’m going to have to call it a night. My brother just called and one of our friends had an accident. He’s fine, but everyone’s at our place right now.”

”I’ll be right out,” he passed her the keys. “I’ll get the cheque.”

”Are you sure, I can pay-”

”Leah,” he smiled down at her, their bodies not too far apart as he stepped down and out of the booth. “It’s my treat.”

She thanked him before going out in the car and putting the keys in the ignition before he came out and slipped into the driver’s seat. 

”I had fun tonight,” he said easily.

”Me, too.”

”Would you maybe want to do this again sometime? A movie maybe?”

”As long as it isn’t come cheesy romcom,” she mused. 

”Promise,” he chuckled, pulling back out onto the road and taking the quick drive to the Clearwater’s. “Maybe this weekend, if you’re free?”

”That sounds-” Shit. Jacob’s birthday. “Uh, I actually have a party this weekend for one of my friend’s birthdays. Would you want to come?” It was a spur of the moment ask, but it could also keep the guys off her and Jacob’s radar and maybe help her attempt to lose her feelings for Sam. Plus, he wouldn’t be there, so win-win. 

”Sure,” Jeremy said, happy she asked. “Just let me know the details later. I hope your friend’s okay.”

”He will be,” she promised, feeling the awkward end of night date pressure as they pulled into the driveway not long after, seeing some of the guys out on the front porch. 

“Your friends… have a good gene-pool,” he commented seeing their large statures and broad muscles.

”Well so do you,” she flushed. 

Jeremy looked over to her and grinned. “It’s easy to look good when I’m out with such a beautiful woman.”

She looked at Jeremy for a moment before he reached over and took her hand. Her cheeks were flushed, but she was still a little unsure how to take a compliment. This dating thing was, well, weird. “Leah? If you want to take things slow, I’m completely fine with that. Are you absolutely positive that Mikayla doesn’t… scare you off?”

Leah shook her head, “It’s not a determining factor for me. I love that you’re committed to her. She’s… a huge part of your life. I think taking things slow is for the best for the both of us. There could be a lot at stake.”

Jeremy reached up and kissed her hand. “Slow sounds perfect. Call me tomorrow and let me know what the plan is for Saturday, okay? Another non-date I presume?”

She laughed, ”Maybe next weekend it can be a real date. Thank you for tonight,” she got out of the car and got some weird looks from Embry and Quil who were outside on the balcony. 

Leah went inside past them, looking for Jacob. Seth ushered her upstairs to his bedroom where Sue had Paul on the morphine drip, leg in a cast. Sue was down in the kitchen, trying to whip something up for the rest of the wolves who were there and give Paul some time to heal. Rachel was by his side, as was Jacob, who was both trying to mitigate pack responsibility now that Paul was out-of-play and console his sister who was acting as though Paul was dying. 

”Leah!” Rachel cried, cheeks damp. She ran over and jumped into her arms, sobs wracking her body.

”I’m sorry, I was out, are you okay?” She looked over Rachel’s shoulder to Jacob. “Is he okay?”

”Just a break,” Jacob confirmed. “Everything else seems fine. He shouldn’t take long to heal. It’s his femur though, so it was pretty painful, hence the morphine.”

Leah nodded, turning her attention back to Rachel as she pulled back to try to console her friend. “What happened?”

Seth took a seat on the futon in his room next to Jacob, and Rachel wiped her cheeks dry. “They were fooling around up on the cliffs, but when he jumped, he lost his footing before he pushed off and didn’t clear the rocks. He’s lucky he didn’t crush his leg. Jared pulled him out.”

”He’s going to be fine,” Leah promised her. “He just needs some time to heal, okay? Do you need anything? Food, water?”

She shook her head, going back over to Paul’s side, taking his hand and sitting on the edge of the bed, feeling more tears fill her eyes as she looked down at the engagement ring on her hand. “Come on, just heal so we can lay in bed all day and watch Netflix,” she pleaded. 

Leah walked over to Seth and Jacob. “Hey, Seth, can you give us a minute?”

Seth grumbled, since it was his room, but he left, and Leah sat beside Jacob. “Has she been this upset all night?”

”Yup,” Jacob said. “She was worse earlier. He was in a lot of pain, so he was yelling out. It wasn’t pretty, but we had to take her downstairs when your mom rebroke the bone and set up the drip.” He knew the pain all too well. “Where were you?”

”I was out with Jeremy,” she said softly, trying to keep their conversation between them.

”How did that go?”

”Fine,” she said easily. “We’re seeing each other again next week.”

”Didn’t scare him off yet?” He teased.

Leah rolled her eyes, “Nope, not yet anyways.”

Jacob turned to her, ”Can you fill in some of Paul’s schedule for the next few days? I know it’s your weekend off-”

”Yeah, no problem.”

”Thanks, Lee. I’m going to have my hands full with his recovery and Rachel and figuring out the next week’s schedule but if you can do the weekend that would be a huge help.”

”That’s what I’m here for. Are you staying here all night?”

Jacob sighed, “I don’t want to leave Rachel, and I know she won’t leave.”

”I have a futon in my room, too.”

Jacob looked at her with inquisitive eyes. “Are you suggesting?” His voice was low; anyone without wolf hearing wouldn’t have heard, and Paul was out for the count, so they were safe.

Leah rolled her eyes, though, “I meant for Rachel. You can stay on the couch and Seth can sleep on his futon.”

Jacob smirked, “Sure, whatever, Clearwater.”

”Rach?” Leah asked. “Do you want to stay in my room tonight?”

”Can I stay in here with Paul?” Rachel asked.

”If you want to, yeah, you can take the futon in here instead.”

”I don’t want to put anyone out I just… I want to be here when he wakes up.”

Leah smiled, “No problem, Rach. Whatever you need.”

It wasn’t a dire situation, but she understood how scared Rachel must be. She was in love with Paul and was terrified only weeks ago he wasn’t going to come home from the volturi confrontation. Now, newly engaged and this happens. Her worry was unwarranted; he would be fine, but if it made her feel better, she could sleep in the room with him and she would figure out sleeping arrangements for everyone else.

”We’re just going to be downstairs, okay?” Rachel nodded and Leah motioned for Jacob to go downstairs with her.

All the guys were eating burgers her mom had cooked, and Leah and Jacob grabbed one each before Jacob updated everyone that Paul would be fine and they could all go home for the night. When everyone finished their food, they left, and Sue came out, frowning. 

”Rachel’s beside herself with worry, it’s such a sin, I tried to convince her he was going to be fine-”

”She’ll be fine, mom,” Leah promised. “She’s going to stay on the futon in Seth’s room tonight.”

”I’ll take the couch,” Seth said easily.

”I don’t have to stay, if you’re okay with dealing with my sister-”

”You can take the couch and I can crash at Brady’s,” Seth offered. 

”I’ve got the futon in my room, too,” Leah forced out, wishing Rachel had taken it.

”I cleared my schedule for work for the weekend, so I’ll be around if anyone needs anything. I’m going to go check on Paul and get some sleep. There’s plenty of room here for everyone.” Sue went upstairs and Leah sighed. 

”Well, I’m going to bed, you guys can fight over the couch.”

Leah padded upstairs and washed her face and put her hair up before changing into her pajamas. She checked on Rachel and made sure she was comfortable before retreating to her room - and seeing Jacob perfectly comfortable on the futon. 

”You know your house is only like five minutes away right?” Leah asked, shutting the door behind her before she closed the blinds.

”Is that your attempt to pretend as though sleeping in the same room as me is disgusting?”

”Not disgusting, no,” she said easily before turning on the lamp on her night table and shutting off the main light before slipping into her own bed. “Just unnecessary.”

”I figured you wouldn’t mind considering.”

”Considering what?”

”Considering if we’re going to be continuing our… activities, me sleeping on a futon in your room isn’t the end of the world. Plus, Seth snores, so you’re welcome.”

Leah rolled her eyes and positioned herself onto her side, facing the futon. “Mr. Thoughtful, huh?”

”So did you kiss what’s his name, Jordan?”

”Jeremy,” she corrected him. “And that is none of your business.”

Jacob shrugged, “Well, if we’re sleeping together then it kind of is.”

”Friends with benefits,” she clarified. “Not boyfriend. Now go to sleep.” She shut the lamp off and pulled the sheets up, trying not to think about Jacob’s smell lingering in the room. The moonlight shining in through her window lit the room up enough for Jacob to see her back when her shirt rode up as she got into bed.

”Your back is still scraped?”

”Almost completely healed, why?” She turned to face him, pulling the blankets up.

” I’m sorry, Leah, really-”

”Don’t apologize,” she said easily. “I told you, it’s kind of hot.”

Jacob grinned, “You always surprise me, you know.”

”Why?”

”I thought you’d kill me for, well, that.”

”I mean, against a tree won’t be my first thought next time, but-”

”Next time?” He grinned. She felt her cheeks heat up slightly, glad the room was dark so he couldn’t see the blush approaching her cheeks. When she didn’t comment, he broke the silence. ”Can I ask you something?” Leah nodded and Jacob hesitated before continuing, “You and Sam-”

”Okay, no, I’m not talking to you about my sex life with him.”

”I was just going to ask,” he ignored her apprehension. “If it was like… well, like us?” He had nothing to compare it to, but she did. He was wondering if things with Nessie would be different because, well, this was pretty good. 

”Nothing alike,” Leah said honestly. “Night and day.”

Jacob stayed quiet, hoping she would elaborate. When she didn’t, he remained silent, not wanting to push her. Jacob fell asleep not long after, but sleep didn’t find Leah quickly, and unfortunately, Jacob snored, too.


	7. Birthday

Being with Jacob was exhilarating. The fact that no one knew about what they were doing made it that much more fun and Leah hadn’t felt so free in a long time. When she got down to First Beach, Rachel and Paul were laughing and dancing together among the other couples to some slow song that Leah didn’t know. Thankfully, with wolf-healing, Paul only spent a couple days in bed and now despite his minor limp, he was practically brand new again - much to Rachel’s happiness. 

Embry and Jacob were talking on a piece of driftwood off to the side and Seth and the other pups were playing soccer farther down the beach. The sun – which was weird to see this time of year, had only just set, the red and orange hue’s still hovering around the far edge of the water. The snow was all gone and if the wind stayed away, it was a pretty nice evening. The imprints were all dressed in heavier clothing, but cuddled against their wolf counterpart they were able to stay nice and warm even without the extra layers.

Leah, on the other hand, had thrown on a pair of jeans and a light sweater in efforts to blend in and as she approached the beach – taking the long way around to avoid the sea of romance, she met Jacob and Embry on the sidelines. Jeremy was meeting her after his dance class, so she was flying solo for now.

“Hey Leah,” Embry said, a friendly note to his voice.

“Hey,” she said easily, sitting beside Embry, Jacob on the opposite side. It hadn’t been easy hiding their activities and their thoughts in wolf form were hard enough to control, let alone the slight recklessness associated with sneaking around. Leah could see Seth’s confusion when she was out later than normal – and could clearly tell her bullshit excuses were covering something, but he didn’t ask outright, and thankfully Sue knew her boundaries when it came to her daughter. 

“I can’t believe how mild it is,” Embry tried to make casual conversation. It was clear his crush for Leah was becoming an obstacle for their friendship. Only Jacob knew about Jeremy thus far, though - until tonight at least. Embry and Quil had seen him drop her off the night Paul broke his leg, but luckily, they hadn’t asked questions.

“Well we are a million degrees above mild,” Leah mused.

Another slow song followed, and Leah wondered how depressing this night may be – despite Rachel’s claim for fun. She had only decided to come for Jacob - since it was his belated birthday celebration. 

“Do you want to dance?” Embry asked Leah suddenly, taking note of Jacob’s advice the day of the wedding. This seemed like a much more appropriate place to ask.

Leah was a little surprised by his outright offer – and a little taken aback by his confidence. It was mean, but she wouldn’t lead him on, and she could almost see the smirk Jacob was trying to conceal as he turned his attention back to the imprints. 

“You’ll have to get me drunk first, Call,” she replied, trying to lighten the mood, but she still felt bad for being the reason for the dejected look on his face. It would be worse if she let him think she was interested, though. Maybe another time or life, but right now, her mind was too consumed by dirty thoughts about the other wolf sitting on the driftwood. It wasn’t fair to Embry. Then, there was also Jeremy who was practically a saint and technically her date for tonight.

“I guess I’ve got my work cut out for me,” he played it off easily, but his tone was disappointed.

“How’s it feels to be another year older?” Leah mused, turning her attention to Jacob, shifting the mood. “I mean, a year and a week, but.”

“No different, especially since I don’t age,” he teased back. 

“I hope you don’t mind, but I asked Jeremy to come tonight.”

“Jeremy?” Embry asked.

“Yeah, he’s a friend Rachel introduced me to from the dance studio.”

If Embry wasn’t disappointed earlier, he was now. Leah felt kind of bad, but luckily, Jacob freed her of anymore awkwardness. “I’m excited to meet him. I need a beer. Embry?”

Both boys shared a glance before getting up and grabbing a beer in the cooler. Leah wasn’t really in the mood tonight to drink but took the beer Jacob extended to her on his return. Thankfully, Jared managed to get away from Kim for enough time to meet Embry at the beer cooler and strike up a conversation.

“I think you’ve got an admirer,” Jacob teased as he sat beside her, keeping enough distance between them not to turn any heads, but enough that the small distance between them was begging to be closed. Whenever Leah was around him, there was this intense charge of sexual energy that overwhelmed him. It made sense considering they barely even made polite conversation anymore before ripping each other’s clothes off. Their awkward one-night stand exactly one week ago had turned into a very interesting relationship, picking up immensely over the last week. It was like they looked for any excuse to get even five minutes alone. It really surprised both how easy their interactions were with sex involved. 

Since the tree incident, they managed to sneak away together a handful of times. Once earlier in the week when Jacob convinced Embry and Quil to go patrol without Leah – that they had to talk. Surely, ‘talking’ couldn’t have gotten any better. She missed patrol completely and laid with him in a field out back from his house all afternoon, talking, laughing, and well, removing each other’s clothes. The other two times she sneaked out or stayed late after patrol to meet up with him. Though, admittedly, the day she ditched patrol kind of counted more than once.

“Shut up,” Leah groaned, twisting the cap off her beer. “He’s sweet, really, but-“

“You don’t really do sweet,” Jacob finished her sentence, going back to the familiar joke between them. 

Leah shrugged, feeling tainted in reference to sweet Embry. Embry was more of a follower, though, and Leah realized she was interested in a man with power; who led the pack - quite literally speaking. She was fierce and unapologetic for who she was and needed someone who could challenge her and be her equal - not someone who would placate her and tip toe around anything that needed to be said. Embry was a great guy, just not her guy. “He’s too nice to get messed up with me.” 

“And I’m not nice enough?” Jacob joked.

“There’s definitely nothing nice or sweet about you – especially after last week,” she glared playfully at Jacob, referring to their tree-indecent the week prior. “You’re making it very hard to avoid any evidence, Black. You do realize I’m naked with half the pack on a regular basis, right?” Thankfully, the marks didn’t stick around for long, but it was fun to tease him about his animalistic tendencies. Maybe their inner animal was the catalyst for their sexual relationship - animalistic desire that needed to be sated. After all, wolves in the wild didn’t care so much about intimacy over the act of sexual relief itself. Maybe their purely physical relationship made sense considering their carnal natures. 

“Ooh, if we want to talk about marks, how about my back after last night?” Jacob taunted. “Or did you conveniently forget about those?” Even just talking about their secret caused Jacob to feel his pants growing slightly tighter. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she grinned devilishly.

A fast song came on and the rest of the guys congregated around the BBQ, the girls staying on their makeshift beach dance floor singing loudly and out of tune to ‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.’ She felt much lighter with Emily and Sam still off on their honeymoon. At least they weren’t there to drag her mood down. La Push was hers, after all, not Emily’s; even though Emily had managed to make her own home feel like a prison. 

“You sure you don’t ‘wanna join them?” Jacob asked, gesturing to the girls mini-party.

“Positive,” Leah looked over at Jacob, having been watching the others to try and avoid catching his eye as they spoke. When they made eye contact, Leah knew it was a bad idea. She felt like a teenager again – obsessed with the feelings Jacob would surely make her feel if they left. She could tell he felt it, too, because his eyes told her he would rather be tucked away with her any other place than there – except maybe with Renesmee. Her and Sam had been very close when they were together, and Jacob gave her body the exercise it craved since the break-up with a newfound intensity and danger.

She had been at Jacob’s the night before, with Rachel. Paul was all healed up, and Rachel asked her to come over and help her with some wedding stuff. She wasn’t sure if it was because her friend had been so worried about Paul only days prior, or because she knew Jacob would be home, that she agreed. She knew, however, that there was a very real possibility that the wolves could sneak off together after if he wasn’t at the Cullen’s – and she had been right. Only moments after Leah left Billy’s, she had gotten a text from Jacob telling her to meet him at their clearing behind his house, a ways into the woods. Honestly, it was probably her new favorite place: quiet, serene, private, and surrounded by nature. Not to mention the sex.

“How’s Renesmee doing?” She had to diffuse the tension somehow, or she knew they wouldn’t make it through the evening. Plus, they had to preserve their secrecy and Jeremy would be there later. She told herself that if her and Jeremy got close, she would end it with Jacob, but not until she felt him out a little more.

Jacob managed to snap out of his trance at the mention of his imprint and he felt a familiar wave of regret come over him at the thoughts he had been thinking of momentarily about another woman. “She’s good, shouldn’t be long now.”

Leah nodded, finding the conversation topic thought-sobering and kind of depressing if she was being honest. Soon, she would no longer have her energy outlet in Jacob, then what? Would her and Jeremy be together then? Would they crash and burn, and she end up alone again? “That’s good then.”

The conversation died there, and the sexual tension died with it. A long moment of awkward silence later, Rachel finally spotted Leah’s arrival and ran over.

“You came!” Rachel smiled, pulling her friend into a hug. 

“I said I would,” Leah promised. 

“I have something to ask you, come here,” she ushered Leah away from Jacob and into the party with the other girls, grabbing a nearby blush pink bag and passing it to Leah.

“What’s this?” 

“Open it!” Rachel said happily. 

Leah reached into the bag and pulled out a smaller box, opening it carefully. Inside was a pair of silver knot-shaped earrings with a hand-written note.

“I couldn’t tie the knot without you.  
Will you be my bridesmaid?”

Leah smiled at the gesture and although her adversity to weddings was known, she couldn’t say no to her – especially considering she agreed to Emily under much more forced conditions. “Of course,” Leah said softly, looking up to a tearful Rachel. 

“I’m so glad!” Rachel pulled her into another hug, almost knocking the box out of her hand. “I was worried you wouldn’t want to, you know, since you’re not a huge wedding fan-“

“I’m not a fan of weddings, but I can’t wait to be a part of your happy ending – even if it is with Paul,” Leah teased, genuinely excited for Rachel to get her well-deserved happy ending. She didn’t have to force her excitement this time, which was a huge relief and Leah had long come to terms of her own self not ever getting married – so she wasn’t too envious.

“You seem good the past few days,” Rachel smiled. “More like... I don’t know, you before Sam?” 

Leah shrugged. “I feel like maybe I can finally put him behind me,” she said honestly. “Since the wedding and all. It helps not having him around the last couple of weeks.” Unfortunately, they would be home in the next few days, so she was trying to enjoy the small slice of freedom she had in the meantime. 

“Closure is good,” Rachel said happily. “You deserve to be happy, Leah.” 

She gave Rachel a sincere smile. “How is Paul?”

“Back to normal. Thank God you all heal so quickly. I was so scared. Hey, have you called Jeremy?”

“Uh, we actually saw each other the night Paul got hurt and he’s coming later tonight after his classes.”

“Oh my gosh, I completely forgot with everything that happened! How was it?” Rachel practically screamed, drawing some looks from the others.

Leah shushed her and rolled her eyes, “We went for coffee – there’s really not much more to tell.”

“Did you kiss him?”

“No,” she said easily. “We’re taking things slow.”

Rachel reached out to hug her again and Leah laughed, wrapping her arms around her friend, careful not to drop her earrings and kind of wishing she hadn’t left her beer on the log with Jacob.

“Maybe he can be your date to the wedding!”

“Who knows what will happen between now and then – but, hey, no hot pink dress, please. I want classy, comfortable, and sexy,” she teased. 

Rachel rolled her eyes and laughed. “I think Rebecca will agree with that.”

“She’s coming home?” Leah asked, surprised. “I mean, she just hasn’t been home in years-”

Rachel smirked, “I may of had to guilt her into it a little - she tried to get me to fly down there and get married, but yeah, her and Soloman are coming. She promised.”

“Do you have a date yet? I thought you were taking this process slow?”

”No date yet,” Rachel confirmed. “Just covering the bases first.”

“You better keep her away from the La Push boys,” Kim commented as she came over, catching the end of the conversation. “Next thing you know, Embry will have imprinted on Rebecca.”

As silly as it was, it was a very real concern. “Don’t say that too loud,” Leah warned. Rebecca was happily married – and didn’t need an imprinting wrench thrown into her happy life. 

“Let’s hope not,” Rachel agreed. “Especially considering she’s three months pregnant.”

“What?” The girls exclaimed.

Rachel giggled, “She told me I could tell you guys - finally. Hence me trying to get things into place for the wedding. It’s either going to have to be soon before she gets too pregnant and can’t fly, or after she has the baby. I’m thinking after because it gives us so much more time to plan and then maybe her baby can be the ring bearer or flower girl-” Rachel was rambling, but Leah saw the love and excitement in her eyes. Realistically, a wedding could be thrown together fairly quickly around La Push considering they didn’t have huge halls and extravagant hotels that had to be booked out years in advance. Rachel mentioned wanting to get married on the beach, so it wouldn’t take too much planning, but she was also extremely type-A and wanted everything to be perfect. Leah couldn’t blame her; it was a hugely important day.

”Let me know if you need anything,” Leah said honestly. “I’m not sure how much help I’ll be though-”

”Oh, come on, you’ve had your wedding planned since we’ve been kids.”

”Nothing extravagant.”

”What did you want?” Kim asked curiously.

”It really doesn’t matter-”

”She wanted to get married in her backyard,” Rachel butted in. “With a small, intimate ceremony with only close family and friends. She wanted her first dance to be ‘From This Moment On’ by Shania Twain, her dad to walk her down the aisle and dance with her to ‘I Loved Her First’ by Heartland. She wanted blush pink carnations in her bouquet with white roses and-”

”Okay, that’s enough,” Leah cut her off, feeling nostalgic and a little nauseous. 

”You’ll get married someday,” Rachel said firmly. “I really believe that.”

”I don’t think I want that anymore,” Leah admitted. “Let’s just talk about you and Paul-”

”Because of Sam?” Kim asked, clearly as dense as usual.

Leah looked between them and took a deep breath in, her heart clenching in her chest as she felt a lump in her throat forming. “I don’t want to get married anymore because my dad’s not around to meet my husband, or give us his blessing, or walk me down the aisle and have that first dance with. It has nothing to do with Sam. A wedding is just a huge party anyways; one I don’t need without him.”

Rachel gave Leah a sad smile and Kim apologized just as Jared called out that food was ready, and everyone crowded around the BBQ. Kim turned her attention to questions about Rebecca, realizing she pissed Leah off. Leah tried to focus on Rachel’s answers and thought that it was weird that her childhood friends were actually trying to get pregnant now. It made her feel even more behind – not that being a wolf ever allowed her to get too far ahead. The whole night was kind of sucking, if she was being honest.

Leah’s good mood was starting to fade, and she was tempted to text Jeremy and bail so she could go home and sleep, but the emotions flowing through her were coursing through her body too strongly to allow sleep. She managed to pull herself away from the girls and noticed Quil and Jacob talking off to the side, feeling a familiar fire ignite in her belly. She knew exactly what she needed to forget. She checked her watch and knew Jeremy’s class was ending soon. He would be at least twenty minutes if he left now, so she should be okay for time.

Deciding she didn’t care anymore, Leah went over to where Jacob and Quil stood. 

“Hey,” she interrupted. “Jake, can I grab you for a second?”

Jacob nodded, a little unsure of what Leah was up to. He couldn’t quite pin down the look on her face - anger, hurt, lust? “Talk later, man?” Quil nodded and Leah motioned for him to follow her.

“Where are we going?” Jacob asked as Leah stalked her way down the beach further, toward the cliffs. When she didn’t answer, he sighed. “You know you can’t come to my birthday party and not bring me a present, Clearwater.”

They walked farther down the beach, out of sight from the party, and Leah kept going. They met the edge of the cliffs and Leah went around them, stepping on the damp sand at the base of the large rocks. 

Leah smirked, “I did bring you a present.” 

“Contrary to your belief, your less than stellar personality is not a present.”

“I beg to differ. You’re lucky I’m even here. It was really hard to decide if I wanted to stay at home and watch Friends re-runs or drag myself all the way over here to celebrate you.”

“Well I think you made the right choice - I am worth celebrating, after all.”

Jacob’s eyes glimmered with cockiness, and Leah couldn’t deny the attraction she felt building within her in that moment. “You’ll get your gift when you pick up your pace and stop complaining.”

“It’s down here on the beach?” Jacob mused. “Let me guess. Old driftwood and rocks?”

“Don’t forget the seaweed.” 

The rain continued to hold off, but Leah knew it was just a matter of time until the clouds erupted and soaked the reservation. Hopefully the party would be over by then.

“How many guesses do I have?”

If Leah had been honest with herself, her dressing up underneath her jeans and tank top hadn’t necessarily been a conscious birthday present, but now as she considered the back lace bra and matching thong she wore underneath, she realized it could very well be an acceptable gift. “Two.”

“Okay, my first guess is…. Hm,” Jacob scrunched his face up as he thought about what in the world she could have planned down here. “A sea-do?”

Leah snorted, “A sea-do, really, Jake? You know, my boss, this alpha guy that I report to, is really stingy with the whole paying me thing.”

It was Jacob’s turn to laugh and roll his eyes, “This Alpha-guy seems like a real dick, then.”

Leah looked up to meet his eyes as they walked and smirked. “One thing we can agree on.”

“Well, if it’s not a sea-do, and it’s not expensive, then my second guess would have to be something involving you apologizing for being a pain in my ass the past couple of years.”

“Not on your life, Black.”

“But it’s my birthday.” Again, she ignored him, and he sighed. “Okay, I’m really not going to be happy if your idea is to trap me somewhere down here. Or try to do away with me – you won’t win in a fight.”

Leah turned to face Jacob, who had stopped walking and was leaning against the cliffs, arms crossed. “Would you shut up and come on?”

Jacob dragged his feet. “You know, they can still here me scream out here. The cliffs echo.”

She made her way around a few turns in the rock until they were out of sight from the beach and hidden inside the cliffs. She stepped between two of the rocky mounds into a squatty, but well covered area.

“Leah,” Jacob protested again as he rounded the corner to where she was. It wasn’t very spacious, especially for his broad shoulders, and he raised a brow, the rocky cliffs hovering only inches above his head.

Enclosing the distance between them, Leah pressed her body against Jacob’s and her lips met his as she stretched up on her toes in a passionate embrace. Jacob took a second to react out of surprise but instinctively started kissing her back, his hands reaching down to grasp her hips in order to keep her frame tight to his. He wanted to ask what this was all about, but he didn’t want to deny their bodies this – especially after watching the imprints on the beach for the last hour. He didn’t want to give her a reason to change her mind – even if their space constraints would be difficult to work around... and well, a little riskier in public with their friends only up the beach. It was kind of hot, though. 

Jacob easily lifted Leah up so that she could wrap her legs around his waist and he gently pushed her back up against the rocks so that only one of his hands were required to hold her up and the other could explore under the hem of her sweater and tease the waistband of her jeans. A soft moan escaped Leah’s lips feeling him touching her, but Jacob hesitated a moment. “We have to be quiet,” he warned her. “The cliffs echo – and the guys are close.” Their wolf hearing wasn’t very forgiving. He wasn’t even sure if they were far enough away to be considered safe. He couldn’t hear anything but a soft mumble of voices nearby, but like he said – the cliffs were amplifying and if he really focused, he could still hear the guys on the beach and the music playing very clearly.They should have phased and ran off somewhere more private, but the arousal bubbling in his stomach didn’t want to go through the trouble now that they were already here.

Leah merely nodded, not wanting to take the time to relocate this to another place and Jacob pressed his lips back against hers passionately. Their hands explored each other’s bodies hungrily and Leah felt like she was floating being wrapped around Jacob. This was a level of passion she had never experienced before in her life, likely because she hadn’t done this kind of casual thing before – everything with Sam was committed, full of love, and gentle. Jacob was passionate, both aggressive and careful in a mesmerizingly sexy way, and dominant. She was once again reminded of Jacob asking her if her time with Sam was comparable to theirs and was now faced again with how entirely different it really was.

Trying to muffle the sounds escaping each other’s lips, their tongues joined in a battle for dominance. Jacob’s free hand slipped under the waistband of her jeans and Leah tried desperately to keep the volume to a minimum, but it was hard to suppress when his fingers ventured to the juncture between her legs and his lips moved to her neck.

Jacob knew he should tell her to be quiet, but he couldn’t deny how sexy it was that he was the reason for her expressions. He continued to kiss down her neck and she tightened her legs around his waist, feeling his own desire becoming precedent. She squirmed at his touch and managed to un-twine her legs from around his waist and get back down on her feet, his hand slipping from underneath her jeans. 

He was about to ask what she was doing when he felt her hands start pushing at the jean material around his own waist and their lips met again. Not having to hold her up, both of his hands slipped underneath her sweater and caressed her sides, feeling her warm, soft skin respond happily to his touch.

Leah’s desire was still on his fingers and she could tell he wanted her just as badly as she slipped her hand down into his jeans and felt him in her hand. “Fuck, Lee,” he groaned. He wanted to speed this up and bring their bodies together, but he also loved the painfully slow build-up. In a teasing fashion, she pulled away from him and Jacob glared playfully at her. “Undress, Clearwater. Don’t make me do it, or you’ll have nothing to walk back in.”

Leah felt her cheeks flush at his words and her entire body ached for him. She didn’t ever want to think about going back to the stupid party. She lifted her sweater up and off, only a light crop top tank underneath. Jacob pressed her against the wall of the cliffs again, one hand grasping at the material covering her chest, the other gripping her hip tightly, sure to leave new marks. Leah met his lips with an urgency that she didn’t quite understand and all she wanted was to stay there, with him, all night. She needed this. How did she go so long after her and Sam’s break-up without doing this and now less than twenty-four hours felt like forever? 

“What the fuck.” The small cave’s walls echoed at the new voice – Rachel’s. 

Jacob and Leah parted immediately, Leah pulling at the edges of her crop top to make sure she was still decent and Jacob stepping back, away from her - only to come face to face with his sister. 

“When did this happen?” Rachel choked out; her cheeks flushed with embarrassment on what she just walked in on as they both quickly did up the button on their jeans.

“I’m sorry,” Leah said to Rachel, the regret for not telling her evident in her eyes. But she was Jacob’s sister – and surely Paul would end up finding out. She wouldn’t live that down.

“When?” She demanded. So, this was why Leah was so different lately, she thought idly. It had nothing to do with Sam.

“The wedding,” Jacob responded, causing Rachel’s eyes to flick from Leah to her brother, and then back again. 

Leah reached down and grabbed her sweater and threw it on quickly. Rachel stayed where she was, still wanting answers. “Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“That I was sleeping with your brother?” Leah questioned as though it wasn’t obvious. 

Rachel grimaced at the thought but looked to Jacob and frowned. “What about Renesmee?” She needed to figure out where her brother’s head was. This was… so completely and utterly unexpected and she was so confused.

“She’s still a child,” Jacob admitted. “It’s no harm.” That’s what he kept telling himself. “I’ll explain it when she’s older.” Rachel hadn’t experienced what a wolf’s imprint felt like, only what it felt being on the opposite side, but she knew enough to know it was odd for him to challenge it, even if she was a child. Jacob felt childish to ask, but he had to. “Can you not tell Paul? Or dad?”

She hated keeping secrets, but she nodded. Jacob was family, and it didn’t affect her fiancée. Plus, siblings looked out for each other. “I won’t,” she promised. “But Paul has been commenting how weird you guys are around each other… I don’t think you have too much longer until it becomes public knowledge. I’m surprised you kept it on the down-low this long, especially with the telepathy and all.”

Leah felt her own cheeks heating up, and it had nothing to do with the passion that was building moments ago, but instead had everything to do with the nauseating look on Rachel’s face. “I’m sorry,” she apologized again. “I wanted to tell you, but I couldn’t.”

Rachel reached up to pinch the bridge of her nose and take a deep breath. “As disgusting as I think you even being remotely attracted to my brother is - no offence, Jake -- I still don’t get it.”

”After the wedding, we were both pretty drunk and it just kind of happened-”

”And kept happening?”

”Well, yeah, it’s been…”

”You know, I don’t want to know,” Rachel said suddenly. “It’s your business. Do you… do you like each other?”

”No!” They both exclaimed quickly before sharing a gaze. ”I mean,” Leah said awkwardly. “Not like that. It’s just physical.”

Rachel cringed again, hating herself for even wanting the answers to any of the questions floating around in her head right now, but knowing she needed them. She’d already asked the most pressing ones, though, and was unsure where to go from here. Her best friend and brother were sleeping together purely to get off. Well if this wasn’t a shocking turn of events, she didn’t know what was. She remembered the broken look in Leah’s eyes at Sam and Emily’s wedding, however, and suddenly decided her seeking comfort in Jacob’s arms considering how close they had gotten wasn’t that unfounded. Just disgusting to her. He was her brother! She had held him in the hospital as a baby and taught him how to brush his teeth and how to ride a bike. And now he was having sex with Leah. 

“Why did you come out here?” Leah asked out of curiosity, trying not to think about Paul’s speculation and that their little secret was now out of the bag. 

“I came to tell you that Jeremy was here,” Rachel said softly, feeling the awkward tension between the three of them at the mention of her suitor. “Quil told me you guys went down here when I was looking for you.”

“Let’s get back,” Jacob said finally.

It killed Leah to pull herself out of that cave, away from Jacob. Her body still wanted him, but the mood had been spoiled. Her current arousal was like flickering embers after water had been splashed onto the raging flames of a fire. Rachel walked ahead of them and Leah sighed, “Rach?”

Rachel turned. “What?”

“Can you stall Jeremy for a second?”

Rachel wasn’t sure what kind of game Leah was playing, but she wanted to be a friend to her - she was obviously going through something.“Yeah, sure.”

Leah stopped walking, grabbing Jacob’s hand so he, too, stopped and turned toward her. It was so easy with Leah – hanging out, sex, talking, everything. It occurred to him occasionally that if things were different, this may be something nice to hold onto, but his destiny was with another woman. This was only temporary.

Leah felt more emotions swirling around in her head now then even before they went off together and knew sleep wouldn’t be gracing her tonight, at least not anytime soon. 

“My mom’s home tonight, so if you want to… finish this later, we can meet at the clearing?”

Their clearing. 

He nodded, “I’ll be there. What about Jeremy?” 

Leah sighed, “I barely know him.”

Jacob leaned down in an uncharacteristic notion and kissed her. It wasn’t anything too intimate, but it got his point across - he still wanted her. “Come on, let’s go back to the party – if I have to stay, you do, too, sorry Clearwater. I’ll meet you after.” 

Leah saw Jeremy and approached him from behind, her and Jacob having split up after the cave’s ended.

“Hey!” Jeremy greeted her happily, reaching down to hug her.

Thankfully, he didn’t have wolf smell because she was sure she smelled like Jacob. “Hey, you came.”

“I said I would,” he said as they pulled back. “Do you want to dance?”

There was a slow song that started playing and all the imprints gathered on the dance floor. Leah hesitated, knowing she turned Embry down earlier. That, and she still felt high on endorphins from her moment with Jacob, but she nodded, taking his hand as they went to join the others. Jacob was sat on the log with Seth and Embry and they watched as Jeremy pulled Leah close, their bodies only inches apart.

For the first time, in that moment, Jacob felt something that didn’t sit right with him seeing Jeremy next to her. 

“Okay, so me she denies, but him, she dances with?” Embry groaned. 

“You smell like Leah,” Seth commented quietly, smelling his sister’s perfume. Embry’s eyes stayed trained on Leah and Jeremy. Admittedly, before Seth spoke, he, too, was staring.

“What? We were just talking; pack business.”

“Sure,” Seth said easily. 

“What?”

“You’ve just been together a lot, that’s all.”

“She’s my Beta,” Jacob said strongly.

Seth nodded but couldn’t help but to feel like something more was going on. He also felt a little disappointed that he never got time to hang out with Jacob anymore.

“So,” Jeremy said. “Are you going to introduce me to all of your friends?”

”If you really want to get absorbed into crazy-town,” Leah grinned as his hands rested on her lower back. She remembered dancing with him at the studio, wishing his hands would have felt more natural on her body and now, they did. Removing the formal setting of a business-oriented dance class, she was pleasantly surprised at just how happy she was to be close to him. Familiar, almost. Maybe it was just the loss of physical connection from earlier, but she was glad to be there with Jeremy in that moment if not only to distract her troubled mind.

As soon as the song ended, her and Rachel introduced him to everyone on the beach – finishing with her brother, Jake, and Embry, who were now casually talking on the log. Embry wasn’t too inviting, but Seth welcomed him happily. Leah filled him in on the fact that it was Jake’s birthday and they were all celebrating.

”Happy birthday, man,” Jeremy reached out to shake his hand as Jacob got up from sitting on the log.

”Thanks,” he shook his hand, maybe asserting a little too much force behind the friendly action. “So you’re the mysterious guy Leah’s been hanging around with.”

Jeremy chuckled and dropped his hand, “I guess so - I hope so, anyways.”

Jacob kind of wished the guy sucked, to be honest, but as they continued to exchange small talk, he was overwhelmingly surprised just how… well, normal and nice he was. 

He also felt a little strange; guilty. How should he approach this? Was he sleeping with this guy’s girlfriend? He knew Leah said things weren’t official with Jeremy, but, well, the guy seemed pretty into her by the way Jacob saw him looking at her. Not that he was trying to spy, but it was just weird to see Leah with another man that wasn’t Sam, or, well, him. He also wanted to make sure this guy was worthy of Leah - she had been through a lot and needed someone who would appreciate her.

Seth and Jeremy shared some casual conversation afterwards and Leah slipped away to sit next to Jacob on the log, Embry having since moved on to find Quil in a rather dismal mood about Leah’s new boyfriend. 

Jacob nodded, “You sure you don’t want to end this?”

Leah’s brow furrowed as though she thought he was crazy. “Why?”

He gestured over to where Seth was talking the guy’s ear off. “Your boyfriend?”

“I told you, we’re not exclusive, it’s new-“ 

“Just checking, Clearwater,” he said easily, knowing Leah was a big girl and could handle herself. He had Renesmee to worry about when the time came. “Are we still on for later?”

“I hope so,” she said teasingly. “After earlier… I mean….”

“Hot and bothered, Lee?” Jacob smirked, their eyes meeting, and she realized in that moment how quickly she had gotten used to them being close. It was a little scary and surely, anyone looking at them right now could put two and two together. 

The rest of the night was uneventful but fun. Jeremy couldn’t stay too long and left a little past eleven – that’s when his sitter was off-duty. She hadn’t told anyone about Mikayla, not even Rachel, wanting to keep Jeremy’s life private for him. She had walked him up to the start of the beach to say goodbye and he pulled her in for a hug. “Tonight was fun,” he commented easily. “Thanks for the invite.”

”I know it’s not an ideal first date,” Leah smirked, recalling her words about this being their first ‘official’ date when she asked him to come.

Jeremy chuckled, “Well it was still fun, even if I didn’t get much one on one with you.”

Silence fell between them as he reached into his coat pocket for his keys. “I should get going.”

Leah nodded, feeling the end of night pressure once more. Jeremy hesitated, but after a moment, leaned down to gently place a kiss to her lips. It was gentle; sweet and caring, and she kissed him back easily. With Jeremy, it was so easy to pretend as though she had a normal life. Part of her wondered if that’s why she like him so much – the normalcy. She may not have gotten fireworks in her belly at the gesture, but it did put a smile on her face and when they pulled back, Jeremy smiled, too.

”Goodnight, Leah.”

”’Night, Jeremy.”

When he left, she knew she should find Rachel and do more damage control, but part of her wanted to find Jacob and get the Hell out of there. Unfortunately, the choice was decided for her when she ran almost straight into Rachel back down on the beach. 

”Hey, do you want to talk? The three of us? I don’t like where we left off earlier -” 

“Renesmee called about twenty minutes ago – wanted to see Jake, so he’s gone over to the Cullen’s.”

She felt a weird sinking feeling in her stomach that she couldn’t quite place. “Isn’t it past her bedtime?”

“Are you okay? This whole thing is… not like you.” 

“I’m fine,” she lied, deciding she didn’t really want to explain herself anymore tonight. Maybe going to bed, alone, was the best idea. She could try to rationalize all of this and figure out the next step. “Just ‘gonna head home. I’ll see you later.”

Rachel nodded, but hesitated. “I think I’m going to head home, too. Wait for me okay?” She said goodbye to Kim and ran off to tell Paul she would see him at home before meeting Leah up near the road. “Okay. Let’s talk. What’s up with you and Jake? For the life of me, I can’t figure out how you went from barely standing each other to… this.”

“We got close in his pack-“

“Yeah, I got that. Are you sure it only started after the wedding?”

“Pretty sure, considering I was there,” she said, her tone snarky. “We were really drunk-”

“And what about now, with clarifying sobriety? Why… keep it going? I could understand a one-off, but this is insane, Leah.”

Leah followed Rachel as they walked toward her place. If she was being honest, she was hoping Jacob would be home by the time they got there, though it was unlikely if he had gone to the Cullen’s. “We have fun together. We’re not the only people in the world to be friends with benefits, Rach.”

She cringed at the phrase. “Is this to get back at Sam?”

Leah stopped walking, “This has nothing to do with Sam! I’m finally trying to get over him, okay?”

“What about Jeremy?” Rachel sighed, knowing Leah wouldn’t be too welcoming to her prying, but well, they should have been more discrete so that she didn’t have to ask the awkward questions. 

“We’re only dating. He could be dating ten other girls for all I know. We’ve only hung out twice. If things get serious, then I’ll end it with Jacob.” Now probably wasn’t the best time to tell Rachel about her kiss with Jeremy. It was only a kiss, right? A simple, sweet kiss. She just needed some more time with him first to figure out where it was going; if it was going somewhere.

They kept walking and Rachel sighed, “I just… want you to protect your heart. I don’t think either of you are the type to associate sex with something just physical.”

“What do you mean?”

“With no feelings… I don’t think you’ll be able to separate the two.”

“We’re doing fine right now,” she said firmly.

“For now, but if you keep it up, I think the lines will blur. Friends with benefits never works out, haven’t you seen all the movies?”

Leah rolled her eyes, “Because all movies are symbolic of real life, right?”

“I’m just saying, a girlfriend of mine in college was doing the same thing with this guy and now they’re engaged with a baby on the way. It’s harder than you think not to get attached.”

Despite Rachel’s friendly warning, Leah really just wanted to be alone right now. She was a big girl. “Thanks for your concern,” she said easily. “But trust me, I’ll be fine.”

As the small red house came into view, Rachel turned to face Leah after she studied the house. “He’s not here, if you’re wondering; he’s still at the Cullen’s. His light’s off.”

“I wasn’t wondering,” she said easily.

“Mhm,” Rachel frowned. “It’s not that I don’t want there to be feelings involved, I’d love to have you as a sister, but with the imprint… there can’t be feelings involved.”

“There are no feelings!” she cried. “Seriously, Rach. Can we please agree not to talk about this ever again? He’s your brother, and it’s weird enough. It’s just sex, nothing more.”

“You’re telling me,” she muttered. “Well, be careful, or everyone will know soon. Does anyone besides me know?”

”You’re the only one.”

She nodded, ”I’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay?”

Leah sighed and nodded as Rachel turned on her heel, before Leah called out to her again. “I like Jeremy. I promise after my next date with him, I’ll end it with Jake if I think that there’s something there, okay? Just give me some time to at least figure things out first. He is really great; thank you for setting us up.”

”No problem, try not to screw it up, okay? And please God, don’t let me walk in on you and my brother ever again-”

“Noted.” 

Rachel went inside and Leah walked home, going over everything Rachel said. Friends with benefits had to work – that’s why people did it. She wasn’t about to fall head over heels for Jacob Black when she was already dreading the return of Sam and Emily from their honeymoon the following week. She convinced herself that sex didn’t need to have any emotional ties, but when she thought back to the disappointment she felt when she heard Jacob went off with Renesmee, she wondered if Rachel was right. Was it more complicated? She didn’t have feelings for Jacob… but, well, she did feel a little disappointed that he wasn’t spending time with her tonight as he agreed. It was all so confusing. Then there was Jeremy who was honestly amazing, but she really did barely know him yet. Did she want to stop things with Jacob over the possibility of something better? Not really; she would rather wait and be sure.

Leah went home and upstairs into her bedroom, picking up a book she had already read three times to try and get her mind on how messed up tonight was.

“Why did we imprint?”

“I don’t know, Ness,” Jacob said honestly. “No one knows for sure.”

Renesmee called asking him to come over much later than normal. She told her parents she just really needed to talk to him, so they agreed, and when Jacob got to their small bungalow, Renesmee met him outside and they went for a walk into the woods. She was about fourteen looking, now, and the thought scared Jacob. She was growing so fast – was he about to get his world-rocked again when she matured entirely? How much longer would it be? Was what he was doing with Leah fruitless considering Renesmee’s increased growth rate? Should he put a stop to it now? There was a feeling inside of him, though, his inner man screaming at him for having ditched Leah and his plans tonight to spend time with Renesmee. His inner wolf was satisfied, but his man wasn’t happy.

“I want to know more about our imprint – the other’s imprints. You said I can ask you anything, right?”

Jacob sat down beside her against the bottom of a tree and nodded, “Whatever you need to know, ask.”

“Do you love me?”

Jacob didn’t hesitate to answer, “Yes, of course.”

“How?”

“Ness… you’re like a sister to me.”

“Is it romantic?” Even hearing her say the word ‘romantic’ caused Jacob to realize how close she really was to being fully grown. 

“It may be eventually, when you’re older. I told you, remember how Sam and Emily got married?”

“I just… don’t understand how my future is already planned.”

“It’s not,” Jacob said finally. “I will be whatever you need me to be. A friend, a brother, anything.”

“But you said it usually turns… into marriage, so what does that mean?”

Seeing her concern caused him to grin and he turned toward her, taking her hands. “I want whatever makes you happy. Why are you thinking about this tonight?”

“I just… Carlisle says I’m almost at my mental-maturity, and it won’t be long until my physical appearance matches. I’m trying to figure it all out. What we are.”

“We’re friends,” Jacob said firmly. “The rest we can figure out as we go. We have time, Ness.”

“I’ve missed you.”

“I always miss you, too, Ness.” His time with Leah hadn’t cut into his time with Renesmee – generally the two met up after she finished patrol, late in the night or early morning, so he still had plenty time between his own patrol and Leah to spend lots of time with his imprint. “Go inside and get some sleep, okay?” She nodded and kissed his cheek before he walked her back.

Leah heard her phone buzz loudly on the table next to her and she groaned, rolling over. Her bedroom light was still on and when she looked at the clock, it was 2:30 AM. Who the hell was calling her at this hour!?

She answered it without looking and fell back on her bed, having fallen asleep with the book on her chest. “What?”

“Good morning to you, too,” Jacob grinned.

“What do you want?” She was a little annoyed that their plans got cancelled after the build-up earlier, and she really didn’t want to be awake at this hour when she didn’t have to be.

“I’m outside – at the clearing.”

“Good for you, did you call just to tell me that?”

”I thought I could cash in the rest of my birthday present.” When she didn’t answer, he sighed. “You’re really not going to come out?”

“For a late-night booty call after you ditched me earlier, uh, hard no.”

Jacob sighed, “Sorry, Lee, Ness called-“

“Yeah, yeah, I know all about your late-night with your half-breed. Can I go back to sleep now?”

“Are you mad because I went out with Renesmee?”

“I’m mad because you woke me up at 2:30 in the morning.”

“I thought the reward could be worth the lack of sleep.”

“Well, Jake, I have a meeting with the community college at 8 AM tomorrow morning – or well, this morning, thanks to my mom, so I’m really not feeling anything that makes me leave my bed right now.”

“That’s great, Lee, I didn’t even realize you applied.”

“Nothing better to do in this town.”

“Me?”

“What?”

“You could do me.”

Leah smirked, rolling her eyes at the phone. “Do you smell like her? Because if you smell like leech, I’ll be sick. It’s too early to pretend like I don’t notice the stench.”

“I’ll meet you at the beach.”

“I thought you were at the clearing?”

Click.

What the fuck?

Leah groaned, but her own inner Aphrodite hauled her ass out of bed. She was already dressed from earlier, but she grabbed the blanket at the end of her bed and wrapped it around her before she quietly sneaked out her bedroom window and ran down the short distance to the beach. When she got there, she didn’t see Jacob anywhere – and the party was long over. She quirked a brow but saw damp footprints in the sand since it started to drizzle.

She followed them, back to the small cave from earlier, and smirked when she saw Jacob inside. “You better make this worth my while-“

Her words stopped as she took him in, soaking wet, and butt-naked. “I decided to wash off for you, so you better make this worth my while. It’s my birthday, remember?”

Leah couldn’t help the blush that filled her cheeks and she pursed her lips, looking him over. She found it hard not to let her eyes linger all over his chiseled muscles and the goofy grin adorning his lips. “You’re birthday was technically a week ago - and it’s getting old. Skinny dipping by yourself, huh?”

“You can always join me,” he teased before pushing by her and running out into the water.

Leah knew how irresponsible it was to be prancing around the beach naked if they wanted to keep this on the down-low, but… well, it looked like fun and she was kind of sick of worrying about everyone else’s opinion. She just wanted to forget about everything tonight and have some fun. Plus, it was an ungodly hour. She dropped her blanket, undid her jeans, shed her sweater and crop-top before walking into the water, undergarments still on.

“Come on, Lee,” Jacob cried, splashing her as she got in. The water had to be freezing, but their warm temperatures protected them. “Skinny dipping means no clothes-“

“I’m aware, I just thought you’d rather remove them,” she taunted devilishly as her body touched his in the water.

Jacob smirked and picked her up effortlessly. She wrapped her legs around his waist, and he kissed her passionately – before shredding the rest of her clothes.


	8. Caught

The next three days were long. She had her meeting with the community college and was once again reminded of the scarce course offerings they had in comparison to a college in the city, but she applied anyways. First year was a general year, so she could get that out of the way and decide from there if she was in a position to transfer to a school in the city afterwards – if she got her phasing under control by then. The thought of finally leaving La Push caused her chest to tighten with excitement. It was long overdue and could happen sooner than she originally thought now with the vampire threat diminished. Beta or not, she was taking the first ticket out of this town and never looking back at the first possible moment. 

She also didn’t have patrol duty either day, so other than her college visit, she stayed in and watched movies and old re-runs. Part of her was hoping that Jacob would call, or even Jeremy, but no such luck. A few random texts from Jeremy kept her content, though, and he even sent her a picture of Mikayla practicing her ballet. She was beautiful and had dirty blonde hair and her father’s piercing blue eyes. She was skinny because of the cancer treatments, and had a wig, but she was smiling and laughing, and Leah found her joy truly infectious. Mikayla had every right to hate the world - as did Jeremy, but she looked like she was grasping every opportunity for happiness. 

Why did kids get sick? It was so cruel, especially after what happened to her mom. It kind of made her want to meet the little girl, but she knew mentally that she was in no state to make that leap yet – not until she was sure. It wouldn’t be fair to any of them otherwise. And like she told Rachel – Jeremy very well could be dating around, too. Although she didn’t know for sure, she had a gut feeling that that wasn’t the case. 

It was now Tuesday evening and the sun – which had been covered by clouds all day was finally peering through her half-opened blinds. It was pretty, but, well, it was also reflecting off the TV and Rachel and Ross just had their first kiss outside of Central Perk. Thank God for Friends re-runs to keep her mind busy. Leah got up to close the blinds as soon as she saw a familiar red rabbit pull into the driveway.

She raised a brow and went downstairs in her spandex shorts and oversize t-shirt to meet Jacob in the porch. “Hey, what’re you doing here?”

”Came by to see Seth,” he said kicking off his boots. “He home?”

”Downstairs playing video games.”

”Thanks, hey, Lee?” Jacob walked past her to the door leading downstairs. “Wanna go for a drive?”

”A drive?”

”Yeah, figured it would be nice to grab some ice-cream considering how nice it is today.” Technically any day that wasn’t pouring rain was considered nice.

”Is this a date?” Leah smirked, merely teasing him. 

“Trust me, if it was, I wouldn’t take you to get ice cream.” He stepped forward, voice lowered, “But I thought that maybe we could enjoy some alone time after, if you’re up for it?”

The last time she had been intimate with Jacob had been their skinny dipping adventure and he had literally ripped open her bra and put his fingers through the lace of her panties, leaving her undergarment-less on her walk home. The thought brought a grin to her face. 

She brushed off the immediate happiness that she felt at the thought of spending time with him to the fact that she was just excited to get out of the house, but part of her did enjoy spending time with Jacob, even when they didn’t end up naked together. He didn’t annoy her quite as much as he used to. Maybe that was because now, instead of arguing, they just tore at each other’s clothes instead. Admittedly, her good mood lately probably had less to do with the sex they were having and more to do with the fact that she didn’t have to worry about seeing Sam and Emily around – but that was quickly coming to an end and a thought for later.

“I’ll get ready. Make your conversation with Seth quick.” She turned on her heel and went back upstairs. She pulled on a pair of form-fitted, black jeans with the knees ripped out, a flowy, floral-print tank-top, and ran a brush through her hair. She hadn’t cut it since the wedding, so it brushed just under her collarbone now. It was a pain in wolf-form, but she liked it long. Maybe it was time to focus less on practicality and do more of what made her happy. She even brushed her already long, dark lashes with some mascara which framed her eyes nicely before grabbing her jacket and meeting Jacob downstairs fifteen minutes later. He carefully took in her appearance, and she felt scrutinized by him as he looked her over. He didn’t realize he was checking her out until she shifted uncomfortably under his gaze.

“Like what you see, Black?”

She had to admit, she was checking him out, too. The way that his leather jacket hugged his broad shoulders and muscular arms made her worry less about her own appearance as she drunk in his. His light-wash jeans were ripped at the knee and it was hard to tell if they were supposed to be that way or he had ended up ripping them while working in the garage – not that he did a whole lot of that lately as Alpha, but he always tried to fiddle with something in his minimal free time. His hair was naturally messy-looking, and she pictured running her hands through it. It surprised her just how quickly her body reacted to him now. 

“Just admiring,” he said finally, their eyes meeting, not elaborating further. It felt like he should tell her she looked good, but that was a little too intimate for their ‘friend with benefits’ status, right? “Ready to go?”

”Yeah, let’s get out of here.”

“How did your meeting with the college go?” Jacob asked, catching her by surprise that he remembered as the rabbit roared to life and he pulled out of the driveway, onto the road. 

“Alright, I applied for September just for a year of general studies. Maybe once I get that done I’ll have a better idea of what to go in for; and maybe an opportunity to go to one of the college’s in the city.”

“Any idea on what to choose yet?”

“I was thinking about nursing. I mean, my mom could guarantee me a job. And God knows you guys need a full-time nurse on duty.”

Jacob looked over at her, brow furrowed. “Nursing? Hm, I definitely wasn’t expecting that.”

“There’s always jobs,” Leah shrugged. “Good money, too.”

“You’re not wrong,” he agreed. “I just thought you’d go for something a little more… spontaneous. Plus, your bedside manner would definitely need some work.”

Leah rolled her eyes but ignored the jab, “Nursing is spontaneous.”

“No, it’s just… I don’t know, I picture you doing something more like a lawyer. After all, you never back down from an argument,” he teased. 

“Well, nursing is only four years in comparison, so I think I’ll stick to something that doesn’t keep me in college until I’m thirty. Plus, I may have told Jeremy that I’m working nights at the hospital part-time with my mom doing clerical stuff to cover my night patrols.”

“Creative,” he smirked. “How are things going with you guys after the other night? I ‘gotta say, poor Embry was devastated that you turned him down and then danced with Jeremy.” His tone was teasing, but Leah knew there was a little truth behind his words.

“Can we not go there? I’m just… I’m not interested in Embry. He deserves someone who sees how amazing he is and I do, but he’s…”

“He doesn’t understand you,” Jacob supplied easily.

“I mean, yeah, I guess.”

“And Jeremy does?” 

The question took her slightly off guard, but she shrugged in response, Jacob’s eyes trained on the road ahead. “I mean, no, not really, but we haven’t known each other that long yet. I can’t really let him get to know me fully until I stop phasing. I hate lying to him,” she admitted. “It’s been… difficult to let him in when I can only tell him half-truths most of the time.”

“I know, it sucks. Not being able to tell Bella about us was hard, but hey, you won’t be phasing forever.”

“Well that depends if I can get my temper under control when Sam gets back,” she said only half-teasingly.

Jacob chuckled, “You will. After all, I did you the biggest favor ever and took him on my patrol, so even when he comes back, you’ll only see him minimally. Should be fun hiding my thoughts from him in wolf-form. Maybe I can push him and Paul off together and avoid either of us patrolling with him.”

“Don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten about my two other inarguable decisions,” she smirked. “But I agree on sticking Paul and Sam together – they get along and it’s really easier for everyone involved.”

“I was hoping you would have already forgotten that I said you had two more,” he groaned in response. Unfortunately, keeping Sam off Leah’s patrols sometimes got tricky enough when the younger wolves were busy with school so sticking him and Paul together really wouldn’t work, but it was a nice thought. “You going to phase out on me anytime soon, Clearwater? I really don’t want to have to pick another Beta just yet.”

“The sooner the better,” she said playfully as her voice grew more somber. “Starting a relationship on lies doesn’t seem very promising, plus I want to get out of here sooner rather than later and Jeremy’s practically stuck around here with the dance school so I’m not sure what will happen there.” 

She really liked Jeremy, but it nagged at her that she had to lie to him when he was so honest. That, and if she wanted to be with him long-term, she really wasn’t going to get too far out of La Push. The dance studio aside, Mikayla wasn’t about to go far from her grandmother. She helped them out all the time from what Leah heard, so there really was a lot more to consider with her relationship with Jeremy than chemistry and suitability alone. 

She wanted a fresh start and was it really a fresh start if she was lying all the time and couldn’t be honest about what she wanted? And if she was honest about wanting to leave, it wasn’t like Jeremy could just pack up at will. Since Jacob’s birthday, she really felt the pressure to put an end to one of her two relationships – if they could be even called that. Could Jeremy be long-term? Would he be? Was she deluding herself into picking the first potential suitor just to feel like she had someone in her corner? And if she did solidify things with Jeremy, then Jacob and she were done, and she really was having fun with him. Her head was racing, and she barely noticed the silence that sat between them in the car until Jacob spoke.

“Well, I’m proud of you, for going back to school, and taking the dance classes and really trying to move on from Sam. You’ll figure it out with Jeremy,” he said as they pulled into the ice cream shops parking lot and went inside. His words surprised her, and she wasn’t sure what to say. 

”Okay, serious question,” Leah said firmly as they stood outside of the ice cream case. “Favorite ice cream?”

”Double fudge brownie,” Jacob answered proudly.

Leah hesitated, but nodded as she looked over all the different flavors. “Alright, that is a pretty good answer.”

”Yours?”

”Vanilla.”

”Vanilla?”

Leah looked back to Jacob, brow raised. “Yeah, vanilla, what’s wrong with that?”

Jacob chuckled. “It’s just so… ordinary.”

Leah shrugged as the lady approached them. She ordered a vanilla soft serve and Jacob got a triple scoop of double fudge brownie. “What’s wrong with ordinary?”

”You’re the most infuriating, stubborn, bad-ass woman I know. And you choose vanilla ice-cream, out of all the other, superior flavors?”

Leah rolled her eyes as the lady passed them their order.

”I got it, I’ll meet you back outside in the rabbit.”

”Billy give you your allowance early? Seems awfully like a date to me,” she teased as he narrowed her eyes at her. She obliged, though and went back out in the car. The sun had finally set, the streetlights outside the only form of light around them. Jacob came out a minute later and got into the driver’s seat. “I know a good place we can go.” 

”Where’s that?”

”Wait and see.”

The drive to Jacob’s ‘secret place’ was only four minutes back toward La Push. Leah had pretty much her entire ice cream eaten and was starting on the cone when Jacob veered off the road, into the brush.

”Jake, what the-!”

”Calm down,” he had pulled onto a small, narrow path in the woods. The taillights were still visible from the road, but the front of the car was covered by trees. It took Leah a second, but she finally realized what he meant when he turned to her, a familiar smirk taking precedence on his lips.

”Sex? Here?”

”Better than the garage floor, isn’t it?”

”In the car?”

“Why not?”

His goofy smile was infectious, and she laughed. “Finish your ice cream.”

Jacob put the window down and threw what was left out before shutting the car off so the lights didn’t give them away. It only took a second before his lips were on hers, both stretching over the gearshift to reach one another. Their kissing picked up intensity quickly and Leah somehow managed to get her body over the center console and onto Jacob’s lap, straddling him in the driver’s seat, their kisses sticky from the ice cream on their lips. She felt him underneath her, ready and waiting, as his hands moved up along her hips, resting under the hem of her shirt, nails digging in. He groaned loudly as Leah moved her hips against his, fully clothed.

She pulled back only to reach down and pull off her tank top - revealing her bare chest.

”No bra?”

”You have too much trouble with them,” she mused breathlessly as their lips came back together. Jacob’s hands had more skin to explore, but she broke the kissing again, much to his dismay, to reach down and pull his own shirt up and over his head. Maybe it was their wolf-tendencies raging for dominance, but suddenly, Jacob pushed her back against the steering wheel. “I want you now.” His words were husky and dripping with desire, causing her entire body to light on fire. “Backseat.”

Leah got through the gap in the seats no problem, but Jacob got out of the car and climbed in through the back door. The windows were steamed up already, the outside temperature starting to drop and their heightened wolf temperatures keeping the inside of the car nice and toasty - along with their heavy breathing. As soon as they were in the back, Jacob pushed her down so that she laid back on the seat, him hovering over her. It was a little cramped for both - especially Jacob, but they made do. He kissed down her chest, toying with her nipples before kissing down to her belly button. He reached down to undo his belt when suddenly, he heard footsteps around the car. Then, a light shining in. The windows were steamed, so whoever it was couldn’t see in, but he heard a knock on the window.

”Okay, kids, get dressed and get out.”

”Oh my God,” Leah whispered, immediately feeling like a bucket of cold ice water hit her right in the face quenching any building desire, and Jacob looked at her briefly before reaching to feel the front seat for her shirt. 

No, no, it couldn’t be.

He found his instead and gave it to her. “Put it on,” he insisted. 

”Jacob-”

”Just do it, I don’t know where yours is. Probably on the floor.”

Leah pushed the oversize t-shirt over her head and Jacob did his belt back up quickly before sitting up. 

“Jake, just go out and-”

”You’re not in trouble,” the voice outside the car came again. “But I do need to talk to you, and you need to get home safely.”

”I can’t face Charlie,” Leah groaned, putting her head in her hands. 

”Okay, okay, stay in the car.” Jacob reached over and opened the door. After all, this was his wonderful idea and Charlie wasn’t dating his mom. He opened it just enough for him to slip out and Leah to remain unseen. 

He shut the door quickly, and Leah heard the muffle of voices outside, wishing she could make herself invisible.

”Jacob?” Charlie asked, clearly surprised.

”Uh, yeah, sorry, Charlie, I-”

”I’m sorry, I just… I saw the car off the road. I was on the way to Sue’s and wanted to make sure everything was okay.”

”Everything’s fine,” Jacob said firmly.

”Listen,” Charlie said awkwardly, in full cop attire. He must have just gotten off and obviously hadn’t recognized Jacob’s car at first. It was dark, after all. He took in Jacob’s bare chest and the car windows steamed up. “We run into… this all the time. Just… get dressed and get home, okay? A vehicle is still public and you can’t-“

”Understood,” Jacob said quickly; curtly. “Sorry to have taken up your time.”

Charlie felt just as awkward as Jacob looked and he was about to turn around when he looked down and saw a tank top on the ground. “You may want to take that,” he gestured to the ground as Jacob leaned down to pick it up before hearing Charlie’s voice again. “Jake?”

”Yeah?”

”I know you have Billy to talk to and everything, but, just, uh, be safe, okay?”

”Will do, thanks Charlie.”

Charlie left and got back into the cop cruiser that Jacob saw parked a little further up the road. He opened the back door again, but Leah had already climbed up into the front. “Take me home.”

”Got it,” Jacob climbed back into the driver’s seat. He gave her shirt back to her and she took his off, changing before he slipped back into his t-shirt and got back on the road. “Well, that was a mood killer.”

”You’re telling me,” she said, cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

Jacob couldn’t help but to smirk as he drove the short distance back into the heart of La Push. “You’re pretty cute embarrassed.”

He wasn’t sure where the words came from, or if he just wanted to make her feel better about picking the worst spot ever to try to have sex with her, but he did notice a smirk tugging at the edge of her lips - along with another infamous Leah eye roll.

Jacob dropped her off down the road from her house when he saw Charlie’s cruiser in the driveway and Leah awkwardly bid him farewell as he leaned over to press a gentle kiss to her lips which mirrored the kiss that they shared after Rachel had caught them on the beach: a little too intimate. She went around the house, going in the back door, trying to be stealthy and focus on getting inside without attracting too much attention or questions. 

Trying was the operative word. Charlie and her mom were in the kitchen talking and they both turned their attention to her when she walked in through the back door. “Hey, what’s up?”

”Nothing,” Sue said easily. “Just talking about Charlie’s night.”

Leah froze and nodded in the doorway, taking off her leather jacket and throwing it on the back of the chair in the kitchen.

”Leah?” Sue asked. “Don’t forget to go get groceries tomorrow, okay?”

Leah stopped, facing Charlie and Sue and she nodded, but something caught Charlie’s eye. “Leah,” he said hesitantly, looking at her tank top: the same one he saw on the ground outside of Jacob’s car. “Are you… are you involved with Jacob Black?”  
“What?” Leah had no choice but to play dumb.

”Charlie,” Sue chastised. “What-”

”You were with him tonight, weren’t you?”

”What are you talking about?”

”Charlie!” Sue exclaimed again. 

”Your tank top,” Charlie ignored his girlfriend. “It was the same one I saw outside Jacob’s car.”

”Must be a coincidence.”

Shit. 

”Leah?” Sue looked to her daughter, ignoring her prior outrage at Charlie’s brazen comment. He never forced himself on her kids or tried to parent them, and Sue was worried about Leah’s reaction to Charlie’s insinuation, but if there was some merit to it, she had to know. “Are you… Are you and Jacob…”

”Mom, let’s not do this, okay?” She turned to go upstairs but heard her mom’s voice again.

”Leah Elizabeth Clearwater. Come back here right now.”

”Mom, please,” Leah pleaded, turning toward them, knowing the look on her face betrayed her. “I’m a big girl-”

”You’re lucky it was Charlie,” Sue said angrily. “Why on the earth are you going around having sex in public? Haven’t I raised you better than that?”

”Would you prefer we do it here!?” Leah cried, clearly unhappy with her sex life being thrown around. Especially in front of Charlie. Thankfully, he wasn’t her dad because surely, if Harry was standing where Charlie was, she wouldn’t have dared to speak so bravely. But her dad wasn’t here, and Charlie had outed her. 

A part of her was glad that she hadn’t seen her dad’s face when Sue had told him that she had been intimate with Sam after he broke her heart. Thinking back, though, she had been so upset that her dad hadn’t been angrier with Sam. His threats when they dated on what he would do if he hurt his daughter had been empty. Leah hadn’t realized why until she phased and learned about the imprint – Harry couldn’t fault Sam for what happened, but she had still been royally pissed before finding out since she couldn’t fathom why her father didn’t share her hatred of Sam for his actions. She didn’t expect him to get his gun like every overprotective dad in a movie, but she did expect some more outrage. Maybe if she had seen his face when her mom told him about her and Sam’s physical relationship, she wouldn’t have felt as betrayed because surely, he had to have been furious and just masked it because he knew that Sam didn’t hurt her willingly. Her mom confirmed as much after his death and it had killed him to take what happened so passively, but there wasn’t much to be said or done for the way things unfolded.

Sue cringed, and reached up, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Leah, you could have gotten arrested, do you realize that? If Charlie didn’t-”

”Well, I didn’t and I won’t do it again, okay?” She was trying to stand her ground and not let on how truly embarrassed she was. She couldn’t even look at Charlie.

”No, this doesn’t end that easily.”

Leah hadn’t realized their voices were raised so much until Seth came up the stairs. “I can hear you yelling over my headphones, what’s going on?”

”Nothing,” Sue said apologetically. “Just… go back downstairs.”

Seth looked back and forth between the three of them, clearly confused as silence came over everyone.

”I’m sleeping with Jacob,” Leah said finally, breaking the silence, looking at her brother, then back to her mom. “Happy now? The whole fucking house knows.” Leah stormed off to her room and Sue stayed where she was, Charlie putting a hand on her shoulder.

”I’m sorry, I just… it was a shock, I didn’t think-”

”No, I’m glad I know,” Sue said softly before looking back to Seth.

”She is what!?” Seth cried.

”I don’t know, Seth. This could be just to get attention-”

”I thought you said she was doing well since the wedding?” Charlie asked.

”Because she’s fucking Jacob!?” Seth cried. “Jacob Black!?!?” 

”Language,” Sue said harshly. “You’re in my house.” The disgust on his face said it all. Sue knew that Seth looked up to Jacob since phasing, especially without Harry around to guide him through his teenage years, and she felt bad that this would probably change his view of his favorite wolf, but she had to deal with Leah right now.

”Mom!” Seth cried again. “You clearly don’t understand the implications behind this if you’re going to be so level-headed! That’s… that’s disgusting!!!! Jacob’s like a brother-”

”Seth, I’ve got to deal with your sister right now, go back downstairs, okay? We can talk after.”

“How about we get some hot chocolate?” Charlie asked, wanting to help.

”I feel sick,” he groaned as Sue went upstairs to her daughter’s room, but he did take Charlie up on the hot chocolate and went with him into the kitchen. Sue knocked on the door before opening it, finding Leah sat on her small window-seat, gaze fixated out into the darkness. 

”Can we talk?”

”I think we’ve said enough for tonight,” she said dully. “Can you just leave me alone? Please?”

”No, we need to talk about this.” Sue shut the door and went over, sitting on the side of the bed closest to the window. “When did… What-”

She avoided her mother’s gaze and sighed, “This is just as awkward for me as it is for you, so let’s just not.”

”I found out about Sam late,” Sue said quickly. “And I was fine with it, I know you loved each other, but Leah, Jacob-”

Leah finally turned to look at her mom, feeling more anger rise in her stomach. “I know, he’s imprinted and he doesn’t love me, and I shouldn’t be sleeping with him, but I am, okay?”

Sue really thought Leah was getting back to her old self, but clearly, she had been deluding herself. Was she doing this to get Sam’s attention? She honestly wasn’t sure, but she wanted to figure out what was going through her daughter’s mind. “Honey, I can understand that you have both gotten… close, but this isn’t a good idea. You can’t use physical intimacy to fix the part of you that Sam hurt. Or to retaliate against him.”

”This has nothing to do with Sam!” Leah cried. “Why does everyone keep saying that!?”

”Everyone?” Sue asked, clearly confused at how all of this was playing out. “Who else knows?”

”Just Rachel.” Leah looked away from her mother again, pretending the darkness outside held more of her attention than the current conversation. 

”You told Rachel?”

”No, she walked in on us.” Sue wanted to believe Leah’s rashness was because she was joking, but she realized the honesty in her daughter’s words when she wouldn’t look at her. “Are you happy now, that you know all about my sex life? I’m old enough to make these decisions for myself, mom. I’m not a teenager anymore.”

Sue felt a little nauseous. The way Leah threw the idea of sex around wasn’t something she was taught to do, nor ever did before. Her little girl had been broken when the guy she lost her virginity to had left her - and Sue couldn’t fault her then, but this wasn’t Sam and she was right - she wasn’t a little girl anymore. “I know you can,” she said levelly. “But, honey, you’ve been through a lot and you shouldn’t be doing this with Jacob. He’s imprinted-”

Leah looked back at her mom, eyes narrowed, fury raging within her. “Don’t give me crap about his imprint, please. I’m well aware and Renesmee isn’t old enough to be with him yet, so I don’t want to hear anything else about that stupid half-breed. He can make his own decisions.”

Sue nodded, taking in her daughter’s words, trying to piece this entire situation together. “When did this start?”

”Does it matter?”

”I want to understand. I want to help.”

”I don’t want your help!” She cried again. “Mom, please, let’s not do this.”

”Leah, just talk to me! I’m your mom. I love you, and I want to help. This isn’t you.” She was pleading with her daughter, but Sue was running out of ways to help her and she was worried about her.

Leah looked away from her again and felt warm tears springing to her eyes. She didn’t speak for a long moment and gulped back the lump growing in her throat before uttering her next words, “The night of Sam and Emily’s wedding.”

”Baby,” Sue’s voice had dropped all chastisement and was gentle; motherly. Maybe she should have kept a better eye on Leah at the wedding. After all, she had known that it would be hard on her, but well, she hadn’t expected her to end up in Jacob’s bed and she had seemed to be having fun when she had checked in through-out the night.

”I didn’t do it to get back at him,” Leah turned to face her mom, tears brimming her eyes. “I promise. Jacob made me feel… like someone wanted me. It just kind of happened.” Well, if Sue knew all the intimate details of her life, she may as well be honest.

Sue went over to sit next to Leah on the window seat, hugging her daughter tightly. She was glad she didn’t resist her. “I’m sorry,” Sue said finally. “I should have realized how much the wedding would have affected you.” 

Leah pulled away, wiping her eyes dry, not wanting to see the love in her mom’s eyes after the things she had just told her and the way she yelled at her. “It wasn’t just the wedding… it’s everything. I’m sick of being stuck in this town. I want out; I need out.”

”Do you love him?”

”Who?”

”Jacob,” Sue said as though it wasn’t obvious.

”No,” Leah said quickly. “He just makes me feel better. Being with him… it’s easy.”

”Leah,” Sue sighed, feeling her anger dim into sadness for her daughter. “I’m trying to wrap my head around this, I really am.” She paused and Leah felt childish next to her - yelling at her mom, having her sex life exposed as though she was a teenager, and then, well, the tears still threatening to spill over. Her anger never boded well for her tear ducts.

”It’s just sex,” Leah said, forcing the words out of her mouth. “No strings attached, we agreed-”

”Sex isn’t just some physical act, Leah,” Sue said pleadingly. 

”Yeah, I know, it’s supposed to be between two people who love each other and all of that. I tried that, mom. I gave everything to Sam and he still threw me away, so what good is it to love someone and give them that part of you when it’s so uncertain?”

”Do you regret sleeping with Sam?”

Leah looked at her mom as though she just asked her if she had ten heads. “What? No.”

”That’s the point,” Sue noted. “You and Sam loved each other, and you made that commitment, and whether or not it worked out is out of your hands, but-”

”I don’t regret sleeping with Jacob, either,” Leah said firmly. “I don’t have to love him to enjoy being with him. People have sex all the time who don’t love each other.”

“Sex can be a lot of things, Leah, enjoyable one of them, yes, but don’t you think that Jacob deserves someone who loves him to do those things with? Like you had, with Sam?”

Leah was taken off guard by her mother’s approach, but she shrugged. “I didn’t force him to do anything against his will. It was his idea. It’s not like he’s some stranger. I’ve known him my entire life; we’re friends who just so happen to be sleeping together. I wouldn’t do it with someone I didn’t at least trust.”

“I’m just worried about you,” Sue admitted. “Intimacy can be complicated. I don’t want you putting your worth into Jacob.”

“What?”

“Just sex is one thing,” Sue admitted. “But you just said that he makes you feel better and wanted. They’re emotions, Leah. I don’t think using Jacob to fill the void that Sam left is a good idea. I think you’re using sex to forget the pain that Sam inflicted.” Maybe Sue wouldn’t have involved herself as much with Leah’s romantic affairs if things were different, but she knew a part of her was still broken over the way her and Sam ended and she couldn’t help but to think that she was using sex as an unhealthy outlet to feel something other than miserable – which wasn’t a great idea.

Silence fell between them and Sue wondered if she should cut her losses for tonight or not and let Leah sleep on her advice. Using Jacob to close the void that Sam left was only going to only cause new ones with time. Leah had been so fragile since Harry’s death and Sue worried of her getting too attached to Jacob with his imminent imprint looming.

”I’m sorry,” Leah said finally. “We’ll be more careful from now on.”

Sue sighed, knowing how stubborn Leah was. “I know you’re an adult, but you’ve been through a lot, sweetheart.”

”When Renesmee’s old enough, I’ll move on. I know what I’m getting myself into, but for now, it’s nice. I’m not going to fall in love with Jacob.” 

“I really hope you’re right,” Sue said finally. “I like Jacob, I do, but I’m your mom and I’m going to worry about you whether you want me to or not.” 

“Do you love Charlie?”

”That’s not what we’re talking about right now.”

“Do you?” 

Sue hesitated, wondering where her daughter was going with this. “Yes.”

“Did you use Charlie to get over dad?”

“No, Charlie and I were friends and things happened on their own.”

“And me and Jacob are friends and this happened on its own.”

“I’m not sure friends are supposed to be sleeping together. Charlie and I dated for a while before anything intimate happened.”

It felt wrong to know anything about her mom and Charlie’s life, so she dropped it before they got into a conversation she definitely wasn’t about to have. “Well this situation isn’t perfect, but I’m happier right now than I have been in a long time, so just trust me, okay?”

Sue was quiet for a moment and Leah saw the wheels turning in her mom’s head. “I have something else to talk to you about. This seems like a good time, actually.” Sue hesitated as Leah watched her. “Charlie’s asked me to move in with him a few times now. I’ve… well, I’ve declined each time but after tonight… Maybe you kids need a little space. I know you’re stuck here because of the pack and you’re not a child anymore, so maybe I need to give you the liberty of some more freedom.”

Leah wasn’t a fan of her mom moving in with Charlie but if they were going to do it, she had to admit, Charlie not living there with them the best situation for all. Realistically, Leah knew her mom wouldn’t feel comfortable laying her in and Harry’s bed with Charlie and the house was already paid off, so she should have expected this. “Mom, you don’t have to leave.”

“No, you’re right. You’re an adult now and Charlie’s place is closer to work for the both of us. You need space to… make your own decisions. If you’re going to be having sex with Jacob, I don’t want it to be in the back of a car on the side of the road.”

“You’re… giving me permission to bring Jacob here?” Leah asked, feeling the awkwardness skyrocketing with each second that passed. She remembered her outburst downstairs but hadn’t thought her mother would ever accept such a thing under her roof. “I mean, I think Seth would have something to say about that.” Her earlier anger had fueled her words in telling Seth and now she was going to have major damage control to do.

“No, I’m just saying that you do deserve some more space and if you are going to keep seeing him despite my advice, then at least you’re not out in the woods somewhere. Like I said, Charlie’s been asking for a while so it may be time that I take him up on it. You’re not a teenager anymore, so I know you’ll make good decisions. And whether I’m here or not, I’m only a phone call away if you need me, okay? I want you to be able to talk to me about anything.”

Well, that was unexpected. “…I’m not really sure what to say.”

“We can talk more about it more later, okay? Maybe we can do a trial run starting tomorrow. I’ll get a bag and go over there for a few days and see how things go from there.” She leaned in, kissing her daughter’s forehead. “Get some sleep. I love you.”

“I love you too,” she sighed. “I’m sorry I was such a bitch.”

Sue sighed, but a hint of amusement was behind the exasperation. “Goodnight.” Sue walked to the door and reached for the knob before hesitating. “Lee?” Leah turned back to face her mom, staying on the window seat and grabbing a blanket off her bed to cover her legs. “Are you being safe?”

It took Leah a second to realize what her mom meant, and her cheeks flushed. “I can’t get pregnant, mom.”

“You don’t know that for sure.”

“Pretty sure since my body can’t change. We’ve had the birth control talk, remember?”

“And you’re not on it anymore.”

“Because I can’t have kids,” she reiterated.

“If you’re not going back on the pill, you should be using condoms. Just in case.”

“Okay, okay, thanks mom. Goodnight.”

Sue hesitated, not knowing if her advice really hit home with Leah’s stubborn attitude, but she went back downstairs.

Leah pressed her cheek against the glass of the window. It was cool on her cheek and she closed her eyes, wondering if that had been reality or a really weird, messed up nightmare.  
Unfortunately for her, sleep didn’t come easily for her later that night. She tossed and turned, both by the residual lust surfacing in her from her interrupted time with Jacob, her own confliction at what happened with her mom, and the fact that her freedom was finally going to be cut short the next day; Emily and Sam returned home. A couple of weeks really hadn’t been long enough. 

Luckily for her, Leah hadn’t had a run in with Sam since he returned days prior. Her mom dealt with Seth’s disgust over her and Jacob and reinforced, for Leah’s sake, the importance of trying to keep the information to himself while phasing. Sue had left the following morning, as she said, with a bag in hand, and promised to check in on them. It felt weird to have the house to themselves, but well, her and Seth kind of avoided one another. She knew she would have to talk to him about it soon, but she wanted to put it off for now.

The following Friday night, she had met Jacob in their field. When she got there, he was laying on a blanket on the damp ground, arms behind his head, head resting on his hands. “You look comfy,” she said easily.

She hadn’t seen him since the car incident, and he chuckled when he heard her. “You sure know how to keep a man waiting. I’ve been here for a half an hour.”

”Sorry, had to think of an excuse to tell Seth why I wouldn’t be home tonight. And about that, we, uh, need to talk.”

Jacob sat up as she went over, sitting beside him. “What’s up?”

”My mom, Charlie and Seth kind of… know about us.”

”What?” Jacob asked, brow furrowed. “When?”

”When I came home after Charlie caught us… he recognized my tank top and it kind of got messy.”

Jacob reached up, rubbing his hand over his eyes as he processed the information before propping himself up on his elbows. “And?”

”Well, Seth’s disgusted and I’m not sure what mom said to him, but I think he’s keeping quiet for now. My mom wasn’t thrilled, obviously, but she uh, is moving in with Charlie so now instead of the backseat of a car, we can go there. As long as you don’t mind Seth-”

”Okay, woah, slow down.” Leah briefly explained what had happened, in little detail, and he took it all in thoughtfully. “Well… I can imagine that Seth’s going to try to kill me now and I don’t think that I’ll be able to look at Sue the same way anymore now that she knows I’m casually sleeping with her daughter.” His tone was joking, but the seriousness of his words seeped through.

Leah actually laughed, “Well, my mom did say that she likes you, so I wouldn’t worry too much. She’s not thrilled about our… lack of monogamy, but she’s more worried that I’m, and I quote, ‘using you to get back at Sam’.”

”Not an unfounded observation,” he shrugged.

”I’m not,” she testified. 

”You’re telling me that the first night that we slept together you didn’t think about him at all?” He challenged, quirking a brow.

”I mean… no, but-”

”Point proven. I believe you, though, about not doing it because of him now. You’re just hooked on me. Hard not to be,” he teased. 

She rolled her eyes and Jacob reached over, placing a hand on her thigh. “I’m sorry for putting you in an… awkward situation with Sue.”

”Not your fault.”

”Well, it kind of is because of Charlie and the car. Your shirt must have fallen out when I got out-“

”Listen, it was just a matter of time, really. We were delusional thinking that we could keep it quiet forever.” Leah was ultra-aware of his fingers moving gently over her clothed thigh and found it increasingly harder to focus on the conversation.

”So how much damage control do I have to do with Seth?”

”I think you’ll be working on that one for a while,” she smirked. “I think I had it easier with Rachel because she never really looked up to me like a hero.” Jacob groaned, falling back onto his back on the blanket. Leah laughed and laid down with him, her elbows resting on his chest, her head propped in her hands as she looked down at him, a devilish grin playing on her lips. “He doesn’t hold a grudge, not like me, so you should be fine.”

”No one can hold a grudge like you,” he taunted as they grew quiet, both lost in their own thoughts.

“Do you remember after Paul’s accident when you asked me if me and Sam were like us?” Jacob nodded and she continued, “Why did you ask me that?”

He shrugged, “I guess I couldn’t picture it being any better than this in a real relationship, sex-wise, anyways. Your and Sam’s thoughts… when they’ve slipped and I saw a glimpse… it just seemed a lot different.” 

Leah thought about his words for a moment before responding. “With someone you love it is a lot different.” 

“I can appreciate that,” he said easily, wondering where this was coming from.

She grew reflective and sighed, “When Sam and I first started being intimate it wasn’t… I don’t know how to describe it. Passionate, I guess? I mean, it was, but in a more intense, deep rooted desire of just wanting to be as close as we physically could; to love each other and have that connection together. It was extremely intimate. With us it’s passionate because it’s so spontaneous and well, kind of dirty.”

“Dirty?” Jake smirked, causing her to grin.

“Because it’s so secretive and spontaneous and the fact that we’re only doing it because it feels good; no emotional involvement.”

“Why are you telling me this?” Jacob asked, brow furrowed as his amusement of her terminology faded.

“I assume you were asking to compare it to you and your half-breed eventually,” she said softly. “What we have is… animalistic in comparison to two people who love each other.”

“Which one’s better?”

“They’re both great in their own way. I’ve never felt the way I did with Sam with you, and I’ve never felt the way I do with you with Sam, but I don’t think it diminishes either.” With Sam she was so young and inexperienced, but with Jacob? She felt like a woman.

Jacob leaned up and pushed her arms down, so that she fell completely onto her chest. His fingers tangled in her hair and he pulled her face close to his, crashing their lips together. Seth, Sam, and their earlier conversation was soon forgotten.

After sating the desire that the car had stirred in them both days prior, she laid with Jacob, her eyes fluttering closed with exhaustion and she thought about how good he felt; safe and warm. Things had gotten so familiar between them since that night of the wedding. Sex had been their great escape from reality, but now, as their activities continued, she started realizing things she hadn’t before like how he slept with a pouty-lip and how his chest muscles twitched when he was dreaming, and the calm, serene feeling building in her chest made her think back to her mom’s words about stumbling into feelings with Jacob. He wasn’t just filling her desire for something to let loose, but the way he made her feel safe kind of scared her. She didn’t have to pretend to be anything but herself around Jacob. 

Did she actually... like Jacob? Was that why despite her best intentions, she found it difficult to be interested in Jeremy in the same way? Sexually? Physically? Emotionally? Love, as her mom asked, was a far cry from the truth, but maybe there were some innocent feelings there; a crush, perhaps? Laying there with him now, she did admit that a pit grew in her stomach at the thought of losing him. Either to his own imprint, or her choice between this and something serious with Jeremy. Her feelings in that moment alone almost made the decision for her; if it was that easy.

No, there was no way that she could maker her decision about Jeremy because of Jacob. He was imprinted. Plus, he drove her crazy! Once Renesmee was old enough to fulfill Jacob’s needs like she did, he would have no use for her outside of pack-duties, which she knew before they started this whole thing – it was temporary. She had to focus on her relationship with Jeremy. This was the first night that they hadn’t immediately parted after they had both finished, so maybe these feelings were normal after sex; it made sense that after sleeping with someone you’d be on an emotional high, right? Especially after all the times they had been together thus far.

But suddenly, thinking of Renesmee replacing her in Jacob’s bed caused a nauseous feeling to fill her stomach. It wasn’t necessarily because of the feelings she tried to push down, but rather because she knew when it happened, she would be alone again. It seemed silly to worry about being ‘thrown away’ when she knew the difference between what this was when it started, and she felt stupid, especially considering she had Jeremy and was supposed to be focusing on him.

“Leah?” Jacob asked, opening his eyes completely. The aftereffects of their passion had him beat. Well, that, having been up early to see Nessie, and his afternoon patrol. He barely realized he had fallen asleep until he felt Leah stir on his chest. They laid, indecent, in the private field behind his house, outside the normal patrol perimeter – their field.

“Yeah?”

“Did you want to go home?” he asked, cocking his head to look down at her laying underneath his arm. He had to admit, Leah looked pretty good next to him with messy sex-hair, swollen lips, and pressed against his body, but her mind seemed troubled by the look on her face.

“I was just thinking, Jake...” She tried to materialize her thoughts. 

“You thinking?” Jacob chuckled. “God, shoot me now!” 

Leah glared playfully at him, once again noticing how familiar and comfortable they had become with one another. Unfortunately, as he studied her quizzically, she knew what she had to do to spare herself long-term. “I don’t think we should keep doing this.” It killed her to say it; Jacob made her feel fulfilled not only emotionally, but sexually, and she really didn’t want to lose her only outlet of relaxation, but she knew if they continued to do this, she would end up in a messy situation that she didn’t intend to be a part of.

Jacob’s brow furrowed. “What? Why?” Not that he was angry, just... well, surprised. “I mean, it seems to me you’re enjoying yourself, and you did say Sue gave us the entire house now, right?” He grinned cockily.

Leah couldn’t help the shadow of a smile that crept across her lips. “I don’t want to stop, but I just think it’s for the best. I mean, Renesmee will be of-age any day now, right? And I’m supposed to be getting to know Jeremy which is kind of hard to do when after a date with him, I end up with you.” Her mom’s words were, admittedly, getting to her.

Jacob shrugged, “I guess so. I mean... I’ve rationalized this between us regarding Renesmee, but I understand if your relationship with Jeremy is changing.” The ugly head of jealousy reared its head inside Jacob at the thought, but he pushed it down quickly. He didn’t want her sleeping with someone else, but that wasn’t his choice to make – he was fated for another woman.

“Well, as crappy as you feel for betraying Renesmee, I feel equally as bad telling him that we need to move slowly when this,” she gestured between them. “Is the opposite of slow.”

“You, moving slow?” Jacob smirked. 

“Well, he has a kid and-“

“A kid?” Jacob’s brow furrowed. “I didn’t know that.”

Crap. “Uh, yeah. Rachel thinks it’s his sister. I didn’t think it was my place to clarify his life to her, but he has a daughter.”

Jacob tried to digest the information and it took him a moment to response. “And how do you feel about that?”

“Like we need to take things slow,” she said again, as though it wasn’t obvious. “It’s not like I can have kids, so maybe if it works out, it will all be for a reason.”

“You have no idea if when you stop phasing you’ll go right back to normal or not,” he countered. “Don’t count yourself out, Clearwater.”

“I appreciate you caring about my fertility,” she teased. “But regardless, I don’t take our relationship lightly with Mikayla involved, so we need to take it slow.”

Jacob nodded, taking a deep breath before slowly exhaling. “Well, I guess this is it.”

The somber tone of his voice caused her to sigh. Was she making the right decision? She didn’t want to stop, but it felt like they should, remembering her mom’s words: You said that he makes you feel better and wanted. They’re emotions, Leah. Jacob wasn’t supposed to make her feel that. Jeremy was.

“Hey,” he reached down, gently pushing a stray hair out of her eyes. “It’s been fun. You’re… incredibly sexy. We can still be friends – sans benefits?”

“Were we ever really friends?” She teased him, trying not to focus on the fact that he called her sexy.

“I think we both know the answer to that,” he chuckled, pulling her close. “But for tonight, let’s stay here and get some sleep. I’m beat.” He wrapped his arms tightly around her and she took in his scent mixed with the scent of the damp grass and cool air surrounding their warm bodies. He shifted the blanket from underneath them to place it over their indecent bodies. It didn’t take her long to doze off this time, thankfully, just as Jacob started snoring. 

Waking up in the clearing with Leah was sobering. The sun was out for once; shining down on their naked bodies that the blanket had long since fallen off. Jacob went to turn to grab his phone out of his jeans pocked when he noticed Leah asleep on his chest. She looked so peaceful and Jacob took in the gentleness of Leah Clearwater sound asleep, knowing there was no way in day to day life that she ever looked so serene and care-free.

Only a few moments later, Jacob saw the she wolf’s eyes flutter open. “Good morning sleepy-head,” he greeted.

Leah rolled off him, rubbing her eyes before realizing that she was naked – with Jacob, in broad daylight. Crap. “What time is it?” She asked, alarmed as she grabbed her dress and threw it over her.

Jacob reached for his phone and shoved his pants on. Actually sleeping with Leah was new – and null and void after their conversation last night. Not that there was anything wrong with it… but, he remembered the adorning way he looked at her before she woke and how beautiful and timid that she looked. He knew their interactions had been strictly physical and pressing their limits into more intimate territory was a bad idea, especially now that she ended it - which still didn’t sit well with him; he felt like there was something more that she wasn’t telling him. Regardless, it was weird to be friend-zoned again after he had seen her in the throes of passion.

“Ten to 9,” he answered her. “Shit..”

“What?” She stood up and stretched, throwing her dress over her.

“Sam will be at my place in ten minutes.”

“What, why?”

“For patrol – we’re on this morning.” He had to think fast. “You have to come over.”

“Uh, no thanks-“

“Leah,” Jacob said, rising to his feet and throwing on his pants and t-shirt, gently brushing off the grass stuck to him. “I smell like you. I don’t have time to shower. If you’re not coincidentally there, he’s going to suspect something’s up.”

She she wolf sighed and nodded. “Fine, whatever, but as soon as he gets there, I’m leaving.” 

She also wasn’t entirely convinced that he would be fully oblivious, either. Her skin smelled like his and surely their bodily fluids and sweat from the night before still lingered. She had gotten used to the smell, but it would be painfully obvious to the other wolves - especially Sam, since knew her smell so well.

They both quickly left the small clearing and ran through the woods, into Jacob’s garage. When they got there, Jacob opened the automated garage door and Leah sat up on the bench that she remembered vividly from the night of the wedding. 

When Jacob turned and saw her, he felt all the lust from the night before hit him again like a truck. It was like with her, he was never satisfied. She was so beautiful he just couldn’t get enough. They fit together perfectly. He tried to shove the thought away; they were done. Over. No longer sleeping together. And beautiful? Where did that come from? It had been a long time since Leah was… well, beautiful considering she was usually fixed with a scowl. But, seeing her on the bench, he realized her scowl was no longer present most of the time. Not with him, at least. She smiled and laughed more, and she was beautiful. 

He walked over and positioned himself in front of her. “You should really get down from there.”

“Distracting?” She asked, quirking a brow. “I mean, we were too drunk to really remember anything from the night of the wedding, right?”

A boyish grin appeared on Jacob’s face and he leaned in, reaching down to put both hands on her knees before parting her legs slightly so that he could get closer to her. He leaned in, putting his lips to the base of her ear. “Get down, Clearwater.”

“Make me.” Her legs tightened around his waist and Jacob’s lips grazed her ear.

Leah moved her neck to the side to give him access and Jacob forcibly made himself step back from her. “What’s wrong?”  
“You’re giving me mixed signals, Leah,” he said, clearly flustered as he, ran a hand through his short hair. “First you sleep with me last night, then tell me you want to stop, and now today…”

“Maybe I was wrong,” she said meekly.

Jacob turned his back to her and rubbed his face with his hand’s trying to understand her. “So, you don’t want to stop?”

“I never wanted to,” she said, reiterating her words from the night before. 

This morning, with a new clarity, she was scared to lose Jacob; the one person who could really understand her, romantically or not. He knew her pain, understood it, and was able to take some of it away even if only for a little while. She was so far away from that kind of comfort with Jeremy and wanted to cling onto this for as long as possible – whether it was smart or not. Seeing him in the garage, picturing the night of the wedding, caused her to long for him next to her. She wasn’t ready to let him go yet, no matter how stupid, impractical, and dangerous it was. Sometimes, what you should do and what you want to do weren’t necessarily in agreement and she regretted her words last night; how she was trying to convince Jacob of her loyalties toward Jeremy instead of them coming from her own truth; trying to convince herself.

“Renesmee is a non-issue,” Jacob forced the words out. “She’s still a child for now and who knows how long more. Jeremy, though-“

“Isn’t exclusive.”

“You keep saying that,” he taunted. “But then you told me only last night that it wasn’t fair to him what we’re doing.”

“It’s not.”

“You’re so confusing,” he groaned. Just when he thought he had her pinned-down, she always managed to confuse the Hell out of him. When she didn’t say anything else, he walked back over to her, keeping an acceptable distance from her until she reached out to take his hand and pull him back to her. He thought back again to the feeling he had earlier in the morning of her not being completely honest with him, but the thought was short-lived.

“Come on, we have a few minutes…”

Sam would be there any minute - and he would kill him for what he was thinking right now. “I need to phase soon – with Sam, remember?”

“Poor you,” she teased.

“I did you a favor by keeping him on my patrol and off yours, remember? Do I have to keep reminding you of that? How about a little sympathy here considering I’m sleeping with his ex-girlfriend?” Until Sam returned it hadn’t been an issue – but now, Jacob knew he had to keep his thoughts extra in-check. Especially since Rachel and Seth knew already. He was just glad no one else knew yet.

Leah shrugged, her dress falling just a little too far up her thigh, her hair still messy from the night before, and Jacob knew he was screwed. “Sam isn’t my problem anymore.” She hadn’t realized until she said the words how true they were. He was a married man, now; lost to her forever.

“Do you want him to find out?”

“I don’t belong to Sam, Jacob,” she said finally. “I’m having fun and for once, I don’t feel as miserable as I used to since he left me. So, I don’t really care about his feelings about me living my life.”

Jacob knew he was probably being a little too emotionally invested. It wasn’t like they were dating, it was just sex, but he knew Sam would take even less kindly to knowing his ex-girlfriend was just a physical sensation to Jacob. He wanted the best for her, regardless of their history. He also remembered back to the night of the wedding and how broken she was, and he wanted to do anything he possibly could to ensure she never felt like that ever again. At first, he just had a sense of responsibility for her because they were pack-mates, but now? He wanted to protect her fiercely and he wasn’t sure when that started or why.

Leah broke him out of his thoughts as she spoke again, however, “I mean, I understand if you don’t want to take the pride hit by the guys all knowing, but-“

Ah, she was going to turn this around on him, was she? “This has nothing to do with my feelings about what we’re doing.”

“Your feelings? I thought it was strictly primal.”

Jacob placed his hands on her thighs, but kept his torso pulled back from touching her. “You know what I mean.”

“Kiss me,” Leah said softly, knowing the words she said to him the night of the wedding got a reaction, and wanting a similar one now, no matter how dangerous it was. She wanted him to make her feel wanted.

“What? Leah-“

She reached down and moved his hand up farther on her thigh – to sit underneath her dress. “Tell Rachel to stall Sam.”

Paul and Rachel were inside, so he knew how terrible of an idea it was, and Sam would be there any minute, but he felt the pull to her – his man didn’t want to say no and his wolf’s dominance fueled the passion. Jacob threw reason away and pushed her dress up. His lips found hers immediately and he kissed her with a bruising intensity. Leah wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, but she felt Jacob through his jeans, and she let a small moan escape her lips as her body reacted to his wandering hands.

Neither of them heard anyone approaching over their own sounds, and suddenly, they heard Paul’s voice. “Oh shit.”

Jacob pulled back from Leah immediately and the she wolf’s heart raced as she pushed her dress down. They were still decent, thankfully, but they both saw Paul turn immediately in the front of the garage door, putting his hand out to stop whoever was behind him from coming into view.

“What’s wrong?” 

Sam.

“Jacob is, uh, busy-“ Paul stuttered, having kept Sam out of the garage doorway just in time. 

“Just fucking great,” Jacob muttered before looking at Leah. He wasn’t sure what he had been thinking earlier – or if he had been thinking, but a part of him thought he would hear anyone approaching before they walked in and he could decide what to do then. “Stay here.”

Jacob went outside. “Sorry, I didn’t think you’d be here yet.”

Sam looked at Jacob and raised a brow. As soon as he took a breath in, he smelled her; Leah. He was trained to Leah’s scent, almost as well as Emily, from their time together before the break-up. Sam pushed past Jacob to investigate the garage. Paul gave Jacob a ‘what the fuck’ look before Sam’s eyes fell on the familiar she wolf. Leah met him at the door and Sam took in her swollen lips and messy hair – and Jacob’s scent on her, and he stepped back from her, out of the garage and back into the front yard, before turning to Jacob.

“You better have a good explanation-“

“Sam,” Paul cut him off, not realizing exactly what was going on, but knowing Sam was about to lose it. “Calm down.”

“Calm down!?” Sam cried, looking between both guys before shifting his gaze to Leah. “What the Hell is going on here!?”

Despite her earlier words, she forgot how difficult it was to look at Sam – especially when she was about to tell him she was intimate with another man. The thought choked her up and she didn’t know what to say. She willed herself to find words, but she saw the anger in his eyes – anger at her, and she felt her heart sink. So much for getting better.

“Sam,” Jacob said levelly, seeing the same deer-in-headlights look coming over the she wolf’s face as it had at the wedding. She talked a good talk, but she couldn’t walk the walk when it came to Sam. He couldn’t necessarily blame her. “Leah and I are-“

“Fucking??” Sam cried, running a hand through his hair and taking deep breaths to try to calm the red film flickering in his eyes.

“What’s going on out here?” Billy asked as Rachel rolled him down the front ramp from the house. 

They all turned, and suddenly, Rachel realized what she walked in on. “They know?” She looked to Leah, who nodded, keeping her eyes away from Billy and Sam’s.

“What’s going on here?” Billy asked again, as though it was the question of the hour. “Why are we all yelling like crazy people in my yard?”

Sam knew it wasn’t his place to speak to Billy about Jacob’s actions, though he, too, desperately wanted answers. “I’d like to know as well. Why don’t you enlighten us all, Jake?”

Fuck.

This day started great, ended up bad, and was now much worse seeing his dad looking at him, waiting for answers. He really didn’t want to have this conversation with him. “Dad…” His voice trailed off, not sure how to even approach this. They had the sex talk years ago, but now that he was actually having sex, it was way weirder. That, and they had the worst audience ever.

“Jacob and Leah are sleeping together,” Rachel’s voice broke through the loud silence, doing Jacob a favor by blurting it out so he wouldn’t have to.

Billy’s brow furrowed, and he looked between the two wolves in question. “Is this true?” His eyes fell on his son and Leah’s cheeks heated up under Billy’s scrutiny. 

Jacob nodded, clearly embarrassed to face his dad with this. 

“What the Hell, Jacob,” Sam tried to keep his temper under control. “She’s my-“

“I’m your nothing,” Leah cut him off. When he met her eyes, she didn’t back down this time. “We are nothing, Sam. You are married – and I can do whatever I want to do. You have to accept that you have no claim on me.”

“When?” Paul asked, clearly confused, barely expecting an answer back with the commotion.

“The wedding,” Jacob answered him deftly, keeping his eyes trained on Leah and Sam to ensure they didn’t phase and destroy the garage.

“Our wedding,” Sam said, his anger palpable, looking from Leah, back to Jacob. “So, you started fucking my ex-girlfriend the night of my wedding?” 

“Sam,” Billy chastised, but it was no use – this was a mess. What had Jacob gotten himself into?

“You left her,” Jacob said strongly. “You have no right here, Sam, walk away. You chose Emily.” Maybe chose wasn’t the right word, but despite his own imprint, he was choosing Leah right now instead of his guilt over Renesmee, his loyalty to the pack, and his status as his dad’s innocent and obedient son because he felt like he needed to protect her, even if she probably wouldn’t be happy about him speaking for her and would tell him off for it later.

“Go,” Leah said softly. “Please, Sam, just go. This is none of your business.”

“Are you really sleeping with him?” Sam asked her, the hurt evident in his eyes, but he already knew the answer. It was a strange thing to see the pure sadness in her ex-boyfriend’s eyes at what he walked in on. She had expected anger but… hurt? The look in her own eyes answered his question. His body relaxed slightly next to her and his fists un-balled as his face fell and Leah’s stomach sank. “He’s going to hurt you.”

Sam’s concern for her was uncalled for. She didn’t need it. “I’m a big girl, Sam, I know what I’m doing.”

“So what, when Renesmee becomes of-age you’re just going to throw her aside?” Sam’s words were to Jacob, but his eyes were trained on Leah’s and she wasn’t wavering.

Jacob knew Sam’s sweet spot for Leah would wreak havoc if he were to find out what they were doing, but he didn’t realize the true impact until now. He was about to respond before Leah reached out to take Sam’s hand. Being close to him didn’t affect her in the same way it would have before, she realized. She was stronger than this; stronger than her broken heart. “Sam,” she said strongly, not wanting to mediate a fight. “This is between me and Jacob, not you. I know what is going to happen when Renesmee gets older. But... for now, this is harmless.” Although Leah could potentially soothe Sam, they both had such unfinished business between them that they were still a recipe for disaster if things were to get heated, and the way Jacob saw her cry over Sam at his wedding made his heart clench. 

“So you’re just going to throw your body around La Push? What, to hurt me? Leah, I didn’t do anything to intentionally hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you, I love you-”

Leah stepped back from him, confused, sad, and furious all at the same time. “Throw my body around? Okay, for one, you have no decision-making power in what I do with my body since you threw me away. And I’m not doing anything to intentionally hurt you, either. I’m doing this for me. And don’t ever say those words again.” She was supposed to be trying to talk him down, but Jacob heard the wavering in Leah’s voice; Sam had hit a nerve. Leah was failing, and it was Jacob’s turn to butt in. Not today. He stepped forward before Sam could say something he would regret and put a hand on Leah’s arm.

“You don’t love her, not anymore,” Jacob said strongly, the words not sitting well with him. “You have no right to tell her that after what you put her through. I get it, okay? You imprinted and I don’t blame you, but for Gods sake, Sam, just give her space to breathe.”

“You have to let me go, it’s not fair for you to pretend like you have a claim on me,” Leah replied, her voice no more than a whisper. She tried to hide the burning in her eyes, but as Sam studied her, she knew she would never be able to hide anything from him. She did, however, feel soothed at Jacob’s touch and felt her strength grow. Billy watched the interactions between the two carefully and had a bad feeling about this.

Sam’s anger diminished slightly and the small lines around his narrowed eyes smoothed. “I want nothing more than you to be happy, Leah, but Jacob’s imprinted. You won’t find happiness with him.” Sam couldn’t even believe how he could sleep with Leah after imprinting – he considered that maybe it was the age difference but even Quil was adamant on waiting for Claire; no one else would do. A part of him wished he had the resolve Jacob had when Emily came around – to protect Leah’s heart, even though every part of him loved Emily now. He wished the younger boy who fell in love with the woman in front of him now, however, would silence. Emily overshadowed Leah in his heart, but she didn’t erase her completely and he used to cling to that; however, right now, in this moment, he wished all feelings for Leah would completely fade.

“I’m not looking for a husband,” Leah said honestly. “But I need to do what’s best for me and right now… well, I’m happier than I have been in a really long time.”

“And when Renesmee becomes an adult?”

“I’ll move on to something else that makes me happy,” Leah said confidently.

Sam looked between Jacob and Leah and he could feel it; something more than what either would admit to. “What if it’s not that easy?”

“That’s for me to worry about, don’t you think? I know what I’m up against; I won’t be blindsided. I’ll be fine. Jacob and I are not you and I.” It was one of the most profound things she could have said to him, and he felt his resolve fade.

Sam pulled his eyes from Leah and looked at Jacob. “Promise me something.”

Jacob didn’t owe anything to Sam. “Humor me.”

“Just don’t hurt her.” Not like he had. 

“I can tell you now that I won’t hurt her.” He had spent their entire wedding trying to help her! “And not because I’m not prone to making mistakes or doing something stupid, but because Leah is very aware of what this is and she’s very capable of looking after herself.” He would never intentionally hurt a woman, and Leah was a very different woman than anyone he had ever met. She was barbed wire in the face of cotton candy. He knew for sure nothing he could say or do would penetrate her walls, simply because they were just friends no matter the rogue feelings he sometimes pushed down, and he could see in her eye’s moments ago how much of a hold Sam still had over her. Sure, it was diminishing, but it wasn’t completely gone. He also didn’t want Sam to think Jacob was Leah’s keeper; as if she would ever let him think that.

Sam knew that it was time to drag his heels away, but he felt glued. He still felt like Leah was his responsibility, even if he stepped down from Alpha and had broken her heart. He wanted to protect her against any unnecessary further pain. As strong as she was, he knew her skin wasn’t impenetrable, but God, she was so stubborn.

“Go, cool off,” Leah said softly. “I’m okay. I can fill in for patrol.” Her heart was beating out of her chest for a million different reasons, but her heart felt more okay in that moment than it had since Sam left her. She felt idly at peace.

Sam pulled his heels back, ditching his patrol, and walked away. Once he was out of the yard, Billy turned to his family. “This is reckless, Sam’s right, Jacob. You’re imprinted.” He knew from the moment Jacob went after Leah after her fight with Paul at their place for dinner that night that there was something more to Jacob’s decision – something more admirable for the she wolf, and now he was proved right. “You’ve gotten yourselves in a messy situation.”

“Dad, can we not-“

“I’m saying it for both of your best interests. What do you expect to tell Renesmee?”

“She’s still a kid,” Jacob justified for what felt like the millionth time. “When she’s older, she’ll understand it was before her.”

“And you’re okay with this, even with an imprint?”

Jacob nodded, not wanting to get into his guilt over Renesmee with his dad. “I got it covered, okay?”

“You knew about this?” Paul whispered to Rachel.

She nodded, “I promised Jake I wouldn’t say anything.”

“How long?”

“Since his birthday.”

“What a gift,” Paul chortled. “Leah must have a thing for Alpha’s.”

“Really, Paul?” Jacob sighed, evoking an eye roll from Leah.

“Be careful, the both of you,” Billy said, looking between them both, before Rachel helped him back into the house. 

“Well, guess the wolf’s outta the bag,” Paul mused. “I mean, a very unlikely pairing, but I guess now we know how Leah got the Beta position, hey Lee?” Paul smirked, his tone light and flippant. “What’d it cost you? Doggie-style?”

Surely the new reigning joke of the pack. Leah was about to let him have it, but Jacob was the one who replied. “She got it because she deserves it – long before we started sleeping together, so how about you run off with Rachel and leave us alone?” His defense surprised her, but she decided to let him feud Paul this time.

“So you can finish what I walked in on? You have patrol, you know.”

“We’re going,” Jacob retorted curtly, walking away from Paul before he really told him off. Leah followed, into the woods, and they both phased quickly.

I’m sorry, Leah thought.

We have major damage control to do. Seth’s nothing in comparison to Sam and the guys.

You’ve got that right. Leah ran for a minute, multiple scenarios going through her mind. 

Jacob wanted to groan. This couldn’t get any worse. Surely all of the wolves would know now by nightfall.

They ran in silence for the rest of the patrol and when they phased back, Paul and Sam relieving them, Leah waited until they were out of earshot before turning to Jacob, taking his hand as he turned away to get his attention – a simple act that sent chills through her. “Jake, I just wanted to say thanks… For sticking up to Sam. And Paul.”

Jacob looked down to where she grasped his hand and squeezed hers before meeting her gaze. “A thank you from Leah Clearwater herself?” He teased. “I must be delusional. I figured you’d kick my ass for not letting you handle it.”

Leah smirked and dropped his hand, hitting his shoulder. “I guess it’s nice to have someone in my corner.”

“Sure you don’t want to finish what we started?” He teased.

“I mean, I think you’ve still got some damage control to do with Billy. Rain check?”

He smirked, “You got it, Clearwater. See ya.”


	9. Third Date

“I knew there was something going on,” Embry said, approaching the garage later that day. 

Jacob had the door up, working on his motorcycle, trying to occupy his mind and avoid going inside to face another lecture from his dad.

“Embry-“

“You know I like Leah,” he said angrily. “Why didn’t you tell me she was sleeping with you?”

Jacob rubbed the grease off his hands into the nearby rag and stood up, wiping the sweat off his brow with the back of his forearm. “It wasn’t a big deal – it wasn’t anything serious.”

“Nothing serious?” Embry shook his head, a foolish grin playing on his lips. “Really, Jake? You’re sleeping with Leah freaking Clearwater!” He threw his hands up in the air. “You really take that lightly?”

“Em, look, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, and I know you like her, but-“

“But she’s just not interested in me because she’s fucking you.”

“She’s dating that Jeremy guy, actually, you met him-“

“And that doesn’t bother either of you? That you’re forever indebted to Renesmee, she’s dating this Jeremy guy, and you both think you can just hurt others for what, five minutes of fun?”

Jacob wanted to correct him out of pride – it certainly was longer than five minutes, but Embry’s serious demeanor was something Jacob hadn’t seen very often, so he sighed. “It’s complicated, but Leah and I are just… physical; no strings attached.”

“How can you do that to Renesmee?”

“I wish people would stop asking me that,” he groaned. 

“Well it’s hard not to considering the loyal life companion everyone else has turned into upon imprinting, but you just had to be different, didn’t you?” The anger in Embry’s words was evident and Jacob did feel bad for not telling him, but he thought it had been for the best.

“I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

“Did you give her the Beta position before or after you starting sleeping with her?”

This was the second time he was hearing those words – from Paul earlier, and now Embry, and he felt anger bubbling in his chest at the thought. “Before,” he said through gritted teeth. “Don’t pretend like my judgement for the pack is clouded because of Leah and I’s relationship, because it absolutely is not. How did you find out?”

“It doesn’t matter – pretty much everyone knows now. Sam’s thoughts were loud and clear. You could have at least told me… given me a heads-up. You’re supposed to be my friend.”

“I didn’t do it to hurt you, I just… I knew you liked her, and I felt terrible enough for betraying Renesmee… I didn’t want you to think I betrayed you, too. We didn’t plan this.”

“Is it really just sex?” Embry shifted on his feet, not looking at Jacob.

“Yes, she’s dating Jeremy, Em. I’m sorry, but-“

“I know, we’re terrible together,” he sighed, shoulders slumped as he leaned against the opening where the garage door was pulled up. “I knew she wouldn’t get there with me, but I didn’t think she would with… well, anyone. Not anyone of us at least.”

“Seriously, I’m sorry, man.”

“Now that everyone knows, are you guys going to…?” His words dropped off, but Jacob knew what he meant; were they going to keep having sex? He was still a little confused from Leah’s attempt at ending things, but he was pretty sure that they were still on for their arrangement as of now if her actions in his garage were any indication. 

It felt fine to tell Sam how he felt – it was just physical, and there was nothing more, but looking at Embry’s honest concern for Leah made him frown. Of course, Sam’s concern had been honest, too, but Embry had no ulterior motives here – no history. “Well, everyone already knows now, so, it’s not like it matters if we do or not.”

Embry knew he had no right to ask, but Jacob was his best friend, and this was a shock. “Does Renesmee know?”

“She knows that Leah and I are close, but no, she isn’t old enough yet. I’ll deal with it when the time comes.”

“I’m just shocked. You guys… well, you couldn’t stand each other before; It’s Leah.”

“Why does everyone keep saying that like she’s some kind of plague?” Jacob asked.

Embry looked at him as though the entire answer wasn’t the elephant in the room. “Because she was a miserable person to be around before your pack – and because she panted after Sam so hard that we all felt like we were in love with him for almost a year. It’s hard to picture her moving on – especially with you considering how much you used to hate each other.”

“You know she changed when the packs’ separated.”

“Changed, yeah, but… this? It’s just weird, Jake.”

“I know, I’m… still trying to justify it to myself, but Leah’s… familiar territory. When we’re together I don’t worry about Renesmee, or having to watch what I say, or… anything. It’s nice.”

“Sam doesn’t understand how you can sleep with Leah after imprinting,” he said finally. “He couldn’t even fathom it after he saw Emily.”

Jacob got a small inclination that Sam was a little jealous from Embry’s tone. After all, Sam had to give Leah up, through no fault of his own, and there was still a small part of him that hated that. He shrugged, “It just… it doesn’t make sense. I love Ness, but… we’re on two different playing fields when it comes to… well, everything. It’s confusing. She isn’t old enough for the romantic feelings to peak yet, though. I guess when they do, it’ll be different and I won’t want to be with anyone else.”

”Maybe, maybe not,” he shrugged. “Quil’s prime example of having an unfit imprint, but he is pretty satisfied to just wait for her; for now, anyways. I know it bothers him sometimes, though. Maybe it is just the age thing – maybe not.” 

”I guess we’ll just have to wait and see,” he grumbled. 

“I think you’ve got yourself into a unique position,” Embry admitted. “Especially with Leah – because I can see the same admiration in your face when you talk about her as when you used to talk about Bella.”

Jacob scoffed, “No, you’re misinterpreting.”

Embry rolled his eyes, “You’re so stubborn that you wouldn’t see it even if it hit you in the face. Renesmee or not, there’s not a chance that you and Leah don’t have strings attached.”

Why couldn’t anyone just believe him and leave him alone? Who he was sleeping with was his business, no one else’s – imprint or not. “Well, there aren’t any strings, so I don’t know what else you want me to say. We’re both dating, or will be dating, someone else.”

It was Embry’s turn to scoff, “That Jeremy guy? They have about as much chemistry as myself and Leah.”

“Well, she says she likes him.”

“I saw you guys on the beach – I knew something was going on, but I didn’t think this. Her and Jeremy? He doesn’t hold her attention. I thought you guys were just close because of the pack, but now it makes sense why you’re always together.”

“We are not,” Jacob groaned. “We have opposite pack schedules.”

“At everything gathering, you’re right next to her. Why don’t you take Renesmee to Rachel and Paul’s engagement party? Leah can take Jeremy and we can see how things go.”

“That’s not fair, Renesmee is-“

“Almost sixteen – older than you when Bella came back.”

“She’s still too young, Em.”

“Bring her as a friend.”

“Fine, whatever, I don’t know what you expect that to prove. Regardless, can everyone please leave me and my sex life alone? I know not much is private in the pack, but no one teases anyone else this much about sex.”

”That’s because they’re not sleeping with Leah,” he mused. “Anyways, I should get home for dinner. Talk later.”

”See ya,” he called back as Embry left. At least that conversation didn’t go terribly - depending on your definition of terrible anyways. 

Unfortunately, he hadn’t fended his dad off quite yet. He busied himself in the garage after patrol to avoid another uncomfortable conversation but when he heard his stomach growl, he knew the jig was up. Wiping his hands clean of grease, he went inside. Luckily, Paul was still on patrol and Rachel was out with Emily. His dad, however, was in the kitchen reading the paper.

”Hey, Jake,” he said, not looking up from the paper as he entered. 

”Dad,” he greeted before grabbing a loaf of bread to make a sandwich.

He was surprised when his dad said nothing more for the entire time it took him to make and eat his sandwich, he just sat and read the paper. He wasn’t sure which was worse - the silence, or his dad voicing the opinion he knew he was biting back. He tried to remain unaffected by his dad’s presence, but it was, admittedly, a little awkward considering earlier. Regardless, he was sick of arguing with people today, so he let it slide. “I’m hopping in the shower,” he called as he left the kitchen.

”Jake?” Billy called. “I left a bag for you on your bed.”

Jacob’s brow furrowed, and he went into his bedroom, bypassing the bathroom. He opened the plastic bag and suppressed a groan. Condoms. Well, today really couldn’t get any worse.

Seth was supposed to patrol with Jacob the next evening, but he was still kind of disgusted that Jacob was sleeping with his sister. He asked Collin and Brady to switch with him, but apparently the news had gotten around about Leah and Jacob’s activities since Sam had found out. The entire pack knew, and they had varying reactions. His closest pack-friends Collin and Brady wanted to avoid Jacob if he was in a bad mood about the whole thing getting out, so they politely declined Seth’s offer to switch schedules.

Thankfully, he managed to spin Leah a story about why he couldn’t patrol that evening, so she, being Beta of the pack and wanting to make amends with her brother who still seemed nauseated to look at her, decided to do him a favor and take it. 

Leah was reliving Paul to patrol with Jacob, Quil, and Jared, so once she undressed in the cover of the trees in her backyard, she phased into her familiar wolf and met up with the others. Sam would be reliving Quil shortly after.

“Hey Leah,” Quil through happily as he heard her join them from a few miles away.

“I thought Seth was reliving me?” Paul asked from a distance.

Leah ran to catch up with them and fell back once she was close enough, “Seth had something to do and asked me to fill in.”

“I bet,” Paul chortled. “I think he’s avoiding you, Jake, I mean I don’t blame him considering the position you got yourself in with Leah – literally.”

“Okay, enough,” Jacob ordered. “I’m going to talk to him, okay?”

“If you were fucking my sister, I’d be mad, too,” Paul mused. “Need some back-up with Seth?”

“Considering you are fucking my sister,” Jacob cringed. “I’m not sure your opinion has much merit here.” Thinking about how mad he was with Paul when he found out he imprinted on Rachel kind of made him realize how pissed Seth must be at him, though. And, well, he never really looked up to Paul beforehand.

Paul mirrored Jacob’s thoughts with, “At least I’m imprinted on Rachel and not just screwing her for the fun of it. Love’s ‘gotta count for something, right? I still can’t believe you lost your v-card to Leah,” Paul chortled. 

It was Leah’s first time patrolling with everyone since they had found out and she internally rolled her eyes before Jared happily joined in the conversation, enjoying Jacob’s frustration, but knowing if Paul kept on talking about Rachel that things may very well get too heated. “Well, Leah I guess you’re Jake’s new favorite Clearwater.”

“They give doggie style a new meaning,” Paul teased back causing a fit of laughter between him and Jared.

“Your hilarious,” Jacob said dryly. 

“Ever do it in wolf-form?” Jared teased back, causing another fit of laughter. 

“You guys are disgusting,” Leah groaned. “You’ve had your fun, now fuck off.” She expected some backlash, but their jokes were just too much – childish. 

“Guess now we know the real reason why you’ve been so pleasant lately, huh Leah? Getting some on the side from Jake. If all it took was some sex, I mean really, Jake, you’ve taken one for the team, umph-“

Leah smacked right into Paul, causing him to fall into a nearby tree. His nostrils flared and he shook out his fur. “C’mon, we’re only having fun!”

”Unlike you and Jacob, our fun doesn’t necessarily have to happen naked,” Jared snorted. “Did Jakey-boy here tell you that Billy gave him condoms?”

Leah pushed passed Paul, going up to follow on Jacob’s haunches in hopes that they would shut up. “Did he really?” she thought idly.

”Yeah, don’t remind me,” Jacob grumbled back.

”Better safe than sorry, you know, can you imagine, a little… hm, Blackwater baby?”

”Blackwater?” Paul laughed.

”Well, their first names don’t go together very well.” Both guys then began trying to mesh their names together in various ways, butchering it, and Leah and Jacob focused on patrol and trying to pointedly ignore their banter. It was harder than it seemed, though.

“So, Leah, considering your mom and Charlie are together, does that mean you’re like… Bella’s sister? And Renesmee’s aunt? Keeping it in the family, huh, Jake?” This one came from Jared, and it caused Leah to cringe, breaking her out of her attempt to ignore them. She was about to lash out when Jacob silenced them.

“Okay, enough,” Jacob used his alpha voice, knowing their fun and games were getting into touchy territory. He was surprised Leah hadn’t taken a chunk out of the two of them already – it said a lot about her newfound patience, and he was grateful for her following him in attempting to ignore them until now.

Quil pointedly stayed out of annoying Jacob and Leah – hearing their thoughts loud and clear. Neither of them was very amused by the two other wolves and Quil didn’t want to implicate himself in something Leah would surely rip his head off for later. 

“Touchy subject,” Jared snorted just as they felt Sam phase. They were all quiet and Leah realized this was her first time patrolling with Sam since he got back. Jacob had made good on keeping her off Sam’s patrols thus far and it was her fault that she was on this one since she was filling in for Seth.

“What’s up?” Sam asked as Quil phased out, needing to get away from the hostility building within the guys.

“Aren’t you supposed to be gone, Paul?” Leah asked, ignoring Sam’s entrance. “I relieved you ten minutes ago but if you really ‘wanna stay, I can go home-“

“No, no, I’m going,” Paul said finally before they all felt his thoughts leave.

“Finally some fucking peace and quiet,” Leah muttered.

“Oh, don’t worry, Paul and I have a lot more jokes where they came from,” Jared taunted. “You really can’t sleep with someone in the pack and expect us not to tease you about it. The guys give me enough shit about Kim and they barely know her.”

Leah ignored him, and Sam’s thoughts told Jared exactly what the other two wolves were thinking – shut up.

Fortunately, they all settled into a normal patrolling pattern for the rest of her shift. She was about to be relieved by Embry when Jared’s humor returned. “Almost quitting time, Leah! Now, Jacob is off in a half an hour if you want to wait for him to get off so you can… well, get off.” He thought he was hilarious.

Sam kept to himself, but Leah felt the awkwardness heightening between them from Jared’s non-stop amusement at her expense. Thankfully, Jared was right – she did only have another little while before she could retreat to her room and pretend like Jared and Paul didn’t exist. Maybe Sam, too.

“Aw, c’mon, Leah,” Jared moaned, hearing her thoughts. “Be a good sport.”

“I’d rather you fuck off,” she returned, keeping her temper in-check despite wanting to bite his head off. The Beta really couldn’t be going around afflicting injuries onto the pack, but she wondered just how much longer she could go before injuries were warranted. Hopefully after their endless taunting today they had it all out of their systems, but she had a feeling that was wishful thinking.

“You can do better than that, can’t you? You goin’ soft now that you’re cozying up with Jake?”

“Do you ever shut up?” Sam thought finally. “Seriously, Jared, just shut up.”

Jared must have realized the seriousness in Sam’s voice. No, he couldn’t use the Alpha voice anymore like Jake could, but Jared still looked up to Sam enough as a leader that he listened. Thankfully, only a few more minutes until Embry relieved her. The silence was honestly worse than if Jared had kept talking, though. They were close to the beach and Leah ran absentmindedly through the whirlpools, jumping over the little brook playfully before -

Oh, no.

Leah’s tongue slipped into his mouth, his hands gripping her ass tightly before his fingers hastily moved to lift up her dress….

Sam growled and immediately charged at Jacob. His thoughts were loud and clear – and on display for all of them to see. Apparently, the whirlpools had reminded him of their time spent there after the pack meeting, the morning after Sam and Emily’s wedding. Jacob whimpered in pain as Sam bit into his shoulder and threw him to the ground. He quickly managed to recuperate, though and charged back, pushing Sam onto his back, pinning him to the floor of the forest. They both struggled to keep the other down and Leah idly heard Embry join. She ran over to the men, screaming at them in her head to separate and stop this, but they were too fixated on the red flashing before their vision to listen to reason.

“She’s my ex, Jacob!” Sam yelled.

“Emphasis on the ex,” Jacob said fiercely, still pinning Sam down, his lip in a snarl, teeth peering down at Sam’s face.

“I don’t want to see it,” Sam thought back, anger lacing every word. “Keep it to yourself.”

“I didn’t mean for you to,” Jacob snapped, fighting back against him for dominance as Sam flipped them over, re-gaining the upper hand.

“Enough!” Leah used her Beta voice for the first time. “Back down, Sam, now.”

He couldn’t disobey her, but just as he was about to step off Jacob’s chest, Jacob flipped them again, and landed them both right into the whirlpools. Both men separated and shook the water off their fur.

“Pissing contest is over,” Leah thought idly. Embry had been there alongside Jared, watching the action unfold. One of the younger wolves, Abel, was reliving Jacob since Sam was there to keep some level of authority and he, too, phased in, joining the fun. 

“Are we going to end up at each other’s throats every time we patrol together?” Jacob thought.

“Not if you keep your thoughts off Leah,” Sam insisted, pretending like she couldn’t overhear all of it.

Leah sighed, “Your whole ‘protect me’ act is getting old, Sam. Get over it. You left me, remember? You have no say in what I do from here on out. Asserting your dominance over an issue you’re uninvolved in is just pathetic.”

Leah was trying to hide how surprised she was that Jacob stuck up for her – it felt good to have an ally here. Sam looked at her, wolf to wolf, and frowned, finally backing down. “I do want to protect you – I’m sorry for what I said the other day-“

“Well I don’t need you to, I’m a big girl. Anyhow, I’m off, so see ya,” she ran into the trees and phased back, behind her house, redressing just as she felt a blast of wind beside her and then, Jacob materialized before hastily putting on his shorts.

“Jake,” Leah said in surprise as she saw his skin. Sam had scraped his chest up badly with large cuts filling his entire torso.

“He’ll be worse,” Jacob smirked. “When he phases back.” 

Leah looked at him, shaking her head. “You really need to keep your thoughts to yourself. It’s bad enough that they all know about us and have seen my and Sam’s intimacy play out, I don’t want them seeing ours.“ Before she learned how to guard her thoughts well, she slipped up a lot – the guys saw a lot of things that she wished they hadn’t, including her and Sam in bed together. They all slipped up sometimes, but it still made her uneasy to know that other people saw her private life on full display.

“I know, but he still had no reason to react that way.”

“I don’t disagree,” Leah said finally. “Come inside, let’s get you cleaned up.”

They went into the house, Seth downstairs as usual. Leah brought him up into the bathroom upstairs and knelt before him as he sat on the side of the tub and she got out the antiseptic and bandages. Jacob barely winced as she cleaned the cuts up and bandaged them over and her fingers worked quickly.

“You’re good at that,” Jacob mused, watching her. “Maybe a nursing career is a good idea after all.”

“It’s only a bandage, Jake,” she smirked, looking up to meet his eyes as she knelt before him.

Leah felt the passion immediately filling the small bathroom. She had leaves in her hair, dirty legs and arms from running through the whirlpools, and Jacob’s hair was soaked, but none of that mattered. 

“My mom is at Charlie’s,” Leah said gently. “Indefinitely. If you want to…”

Jacob grinned, leaning down to place a rather gentle kiss to her lips. She knew he felt the same passion that she did, so the gentleness surprised her, but her lips moved slowly on his to return it. When they pulled back, she bit her lower lip. 

Jacob reached down, pulling her up to sit on his lap. He wrapped his arms tightly around her smaller torso before crashing his lips onto hers. They stayed like that, their lips moving painfully slow on one another’s for a while. It was intense, but in a different respect to their usual hastiness for release. Maybe it was because they knew they wouldn’t be interrupted and could take the extra time to just enjoy each other’s lips. By the time they parted for air, they both felt the intense, deep longing for their bodies to come together, but Leah hesitated.

“We’re filthy,” she smirked, as she rested her forehead against Jacob’s. 

“Well, there is a shower here,” Jacob observed, looking up at the shower faucet, then back to her, hoping she caught his hidden meaning.

Sex wasn’t new to Leah, but the adventure of it was. Her and Sam had been… well, vanilla, she mused, thinking back to her and Jacob’s ice cream run. Her and Jacob? Rocky road, no pun intended.

“You can’t get your bandages wet,” she said forcefully. 

“I can’t promise anything,” he shrugged. “Not if you get in there with me.”

“Well we do have lots more…” she contemplated; their eyes locked on each other’s. “But Seth’s home, he has the best hearing in the pack…”

”Hopefully he has headphones in.”

He let his hands move down to her dress before he grasped the edges and took it, raising it up, above her head. Thank God she didn’t wear much for patrol. Happy she was naked, he shuffled her off his lap, so he stood before her. He dropped his shorts quickly before pulling her against him and up over the side of the tub, into the shower. He turned on the water and Leah squealed, pushing her body toward his for warmth as the initial coldness came out of the spout above them, cascading on their naked torsos. Jacob pulled the curtain shut quickly and Leah enjoyed his dominance as the water came down between them. She wasn’t sure exactly how clean they were about to get, but that was a thought for later.

Jacob’s lips crashed painfully against Leah’s and suddenly, he picked her up, just as he had in the forest, and pushed her against the tub enclosure. The water barely touched her, now, but Jacob’s body and her own internal temperature kept her toasty warm. She wrapped her legs around his torso, reminding her of their skinny dipping in the ocean, and she wondered just how many times they had been intimate together up until this point. She was losing count – it was becoming as familiar as breathing and she still felt surprised at the deeply rooted passion that passed between them every single time. It was dizzying. 

Jacob grabbed her loofah nearby and carefully soaped it up with his free hand, keeping her up with the other. He looked at her, grinning devilishly before he moved the pink, soapy material over her chest. Leah arched her back, pushing her chest closer to his hand as a soft moan escaped her lips. 

“Seth’s downstairs,” Jacob reminded her, grinning devilishly. “Keep it down, Clearwater.”

She pushed the thought of her brother immediately from her mind, not caring anymore that everyone knew. Seth wasn’t a little boy anymore and it felt too good. Jacob continued to wash her upper half and when she was good and soapy, she took it from him and started moving it over his chest, careful not to get the soap on his bandages. She went up, over his shoulders, taking in the fine lines of his muscular frame as she went, feeling her own arousal increasing with every second. When her hand slowed on his forearm, her eyes scanning him and filled with lust, Jacob reached up and took the loofah, throwing it onto the bottom of the tub. Suddenly, he thrust forward, into her and she gasped at the new contact, feeling her body expand to him as usual. Virgin or not before her, he sure knew how to use his body.

Unfortunately, their cleanliness was long forgotten. Jacob’s thrusts were quick and accurate and there was no need for anymore foreplay. Leah felt her entire core aching for him; a liquid warmth filling her with each second that passed, and it wasn’t long until her body cried out. Jacob pushed his lips tightly against hers to silent her own, literal cry, before he, too, felt his own release hit him. He groaned deeply, moving in her until they were both fully satisfied. He let her down to her feet and put both hands on the wall behind her, on each side of her face, as he closed his eyes. 

Leah saw confliction take over his features as she regained her breath and she reached up, gently placing her hand against his cheek. “What’s wrong?”

Jacob took a few deep breaths in before opening his eyes, looking into hers, feeling his stomach churn with something he didn’t know how to describe – Lust? Affection? Post-sex fondness? Whatever it was, he had felt it before, but nothing of this magnitude. He tried to ignore it and he force a grin. “After that? Absolutely nothing, except, maybe…” his voice turned serious and Leah raised a brow, waiting for him to continue. “How about we finish cleaning up and take this to your bedroom?”

Leah smirked, enjoying not having to be hasty in their interlude and she nodded. They quickly finished washing the dirt off their own bodies and then grabbed a couple of towels to wrap up in before running across the hall into her bedroom. She heard no sign of Seth upstairs and took it as confirmation that they wouldn’t be interrupted. Jacob shut the door behind him, and Leah went over to close the blinds to the window that faced the road. It was still daylight, so enough light peered through the material of her curtains so that her room wasn’t pitch-black. 

Leah walked over to Jacob before dropping her towel in front of him and letting her fingers reach down to untie the knot that he had around his waist keeping the towel up. It dropped, too, and Jacob leaned down to kiss her. It surprised her how gentle his lips moved on hers again. She reached up to wrap her arms around his neck and kissed him back with the same slow, intense passion from earlier. Jacob shifted them so that the back of her legs hit the bed behind her, and she laid back. He crawled on top of her, moving his lips from hers, down her neck. He kissed slowly down her body, appreciating every little gasp he evoked from her until his lips hit the juncture of her legs. It was new territory for him, but he kissed softly as Leah’s hips bucked up against his mouth.

“Not so fast,” his voice was dripping with desire and he reached out to place his hands on her hips to hold them down.

His lips were light and playful between her thighs and Leah could hardly contain herself. Admittedly, this was new territory for her, too and she felt smug satisfaction at the newness. When her hips continued to trash against his hands, Jacob let one of her hips free so that he could plunge a finger into her. He slid in easily before adding another, and it only took a few, swift thrusts while he teased her most sensitive area for the she wolf to cry out again. He grabbed her hip again, holding her down as she squirmed against him and he looked up to her, grinning before he kissed back up to her lips, letting her taste herself on him.

She kissed him back heatedly before Jacob rolled off her and onto his side. She rolled, too, molding into his chest as his arms wrapped tightly around her, pulling her close. “That was…”

She couldn’t find the words, however. Jacob just nodded, able to read her expressions and he took a deep breath in, letting it out slowly, his nostrils filling with Leah’s scent that filled the room and he felt his body react accordingly. She could feel that he was ready again, and she gently placed her hands onto his chest, pushing him onto his back.

“What are you doing?” He asked as Leah sat up.

“Just thought you’d want me to return the favor.”

Jacob’s breath caught in his throat and he reached out to grab her hand, intertwining their fingers. “You don’t have to-“

“I want to.”

She kissed all over his torso before kissing down his lower belly. She carefully took him into her mouth as she wrapped her hand around the base of his shaft, moving it slowly as she kissed and sucked. It was Jacob’s turn to be loud, but Leah didn’t want to shush him. It didn’t take long before he came, and after, he pulled her up and onto his chest. He didn’t say anything, but as he looked down to her face, he felt an overwhelming adoration crash over him for the woman in his arms. It had to be sex related, right? How could anyone do the things they just did without feeling something? It was human nature and that had been hot as Hell.

“I’m not sure I can keep those thoughts to myself, Lee,” Jacob teased, evoking a laugh from the she wolf.

“You better if you ever want it to happen again.” 

He thought back to her previous description about their activities and smirked. “I think that was the ‘dirtiest’ thing yet, no pun intended.” 

Leah rolled her eyes, but her grin betrayed her. He kissed her again and although she didn’t think she could come again, Jacob surprised her by crawling on top of her and kissing her tenderly before their bodies moved together again – but this time, there was a slow and familiar feel to it, and afterwards, they fell asleep on her bed together after. 

The next morning, Jacob woke up, Leah’s head on his chest, their legs intertwined with each others and the bed sheets and he smiled, seeing the familiar calmness that spread across her face in slumber, much like before, in the clearing. He looked over at the clock and sighed happily. As if on cue, Leah’s eyes fluttered open and she yawned. 

“Good Morning,” Jacob said softly. 

The sun wasn’t up yet, but Jacob was wide awake, and he realized just how comfortable it was waking up in Leah’s bed – and how sexy she was in the morning. “Morning,” she stretched against him, moving her head off his chest, and onto her own pillow. She felt Jacob against her thigh as she moved and grinned.

“Round four?” He said huskily as she rubbed her eyes before looking into his familiar pools of brown, his body propped up on his elbow, hovering over her.

“I think you’ve worn me out,” she said, her cheeks heating up at the thought. She felt it when she moved earlier and knew her body wasn’t ready for another session with Jacob – as much as she wanted it.

He couldn’t help but to chuckle, but then turned serious. “Are you okay?”

“Fine,” she said easily. “Just… sore.”

“Sorry, Lee-“

She grinned, reaching up to cup his cheek. It was slightly too intimate, and they both realized it as she dropped her hand. “Nothing to be sorry for.”

Jacob dropped it and got up, stretching. “Breakfast then?”

They both got up and Leah threw on a pair of pajama bottoms and a tank top as Jacob put his shorts back on. “Do you not have a shirt?” Leah mused.

“Why, you don’t appreciate my body?” 

She rolled her eyes, “I’m sure Seth won’t. Especially after last night.” She went over to her dresser and found an oversize band t-shirt and threw it at him. “It’ll probably fit.”

It was a little snug, but Jacob threw it over his head before they went downstairs. Seth was in the living room, watching cartoons on the television and eating cereal as they descended the stairs. He looked up momentarily, then right back to the screen.

“Morning,” Leah said firmly in response to him ignoring her.

“I’ll be in in a sec, okay?” Jacob said to Leah as she went toward the kitchen. She nodded and Jacob went over to stand beside the wall closest to Seth. 

“Hey, what’s up?” Seth ignored him and stuffed his mouth with some more cereal and Jacob sighed going over to sit on the other side of the couch. “Can we talk?”

Seth put his now empty bowl on the coffee table and turned, facing Jacob. “How about we don’t? I really don’t need to hear about you and my sister – I hear it enough; frequently. I may as well just move in with Brady at this point.”

Jacob immediately felt bad and sighed, “Seth, I’m sorry-“

“No, you’re not, or you wouldn’t still be sleeping with her. Especially not here.”

“It won’t happen again,” Jacob said as Seth rolled his eyes. 

“So you’ll stop sleeping together?”

“I meant, well, we won’t do it here anymore.”

“You’re both disgusting,” Seth groaned, looking back to the television.

“How about you tell me what is really bothering you about this, aside from me staying over, and we can work it out?”

“You lied to me,” he said suddenly. “You could have at least told me.”

“We weren’t telling anyone, it’s private.”

“Nothing is private in the pack,” he argued. 

He sounded like Embry but was angry for a million different reasons and Jacob sighed. “I’m sorry, okay? Transparency from now on, I promise. But that doesn’t mean you’re always going to like the honest answer. I’d appreciate it if we could talk about it, though, instead of you avoiding me.”

“You’re supposed to be my friend,” he said sadly. It was the first hint of immaturity Jacob had seen in him since Harry died and he hated not being there for the younger Clearwater.

“I am,” he said strongly. 

“You’re with her all the time.”

He wanted to explode! Why did everyone think that? He almost always patrolled without her, he saw Renesmee, and usually slept in his own bed, but he knew arguing that point with Seth was futile. “Well how about we make time to hang out later this week after school?”

Seth frowned, but nodded. “Fine.”

Jacob smiled and stood up, “Alright, it’s settled.”

“And you’re serious?” Seth asked as Jacob started toward the kitchen.

“Hm?”

“About not coming here anymore – with Leah.”

Well, so much for their free range of the Clearwater house. “I promise.”

When he went to turn again, Seth sighed. “Jake?”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t hurt her, please.”

Jacob was touched at Seth’s concern for Leah, but he just smiled easily. “I won’t." Seth turned back to the television and Jacob padded into the kitchen.

“Damage control complete,” he said jokingly, leaning against the counter. Leah, of course, had overheard it all, and was frying eggs. 

“Well you’ve got more damage control to do, since you just forfeited my bed for the woods again.”

“Hey, I thought you said the tree was hot,” he teased, going over to wrap his arms around her waist as she stood in front of the stove.

Again, they both realized after it happened, how intimate the gesture was and Leah politely squirmed from his arms. “I’m ‘gonna get going,” Jake said suddenly.

“Okay,” Leah said, knowing it was for the best. “See you at the party?”

“See ya there, Clearwater.”

“Hey, Ness,” Jacob entered the small cabin at the back of the Cullen’s mansion a few days later.

Edward and Bella were in the main house, trying to give them some privacy – but not enough so that they were ever alone. It was a far cry from the open-range Leah had of the Clearwater house now that Sue had unofficially moved to Charlie’s. Her stuff was still there, but Sue made her duffle bag a permanent fixture at Charlie’s place, testing the waters out before jumping in completely and unfortunately, that open-range was now officially over – at least when Seth was home. Admittedly, they had both still made good use of her bedroom when Seth was at school or on patrol, and Jacob had gotten pretty comfortable there, but he always made sure to be discreet for Seth’s sake. 

When Jacob saw Renesmee, he grinned. Her hair was halfway down her back – her height hitting approximately five foot two, and he realized since he hadn’t seen her in over a week how quickly she really was growing. It always surprised him. She looked more like a woman every day.

“Jake!” She got up from on the couch reading a book and he hugged her tightly, noticing how she fit much more easily into his arms now. “What’s up?”

“I wanted to come by and see if you wanted to come to our cabin with us tonight for Rachel and Paul’s engagement party? The guys will all be there, and their girlfriends.” Or, wife, now, in Emily’s case. Why did he always feel so behind? 

“As your girlfriend?”

“Hm?”

“You said the guys are going with their girlfriends,” she said, brow furrowed. “Is this… a date?”

Ah, shit.

“I just didn’t want you to think you’d be the only girl,” Jacob sat down beside her, looking into her golden eyes and took a deep breath in. “But, you are…”

“I know,” Renesmee said softly. “Grandpa said it’ll probably only be another month or two, tops.”

Jacob smiled, his wolf happy at the thought of having his forever finally start, but it also felt slightly unsettling. “Where are you mentally?”

“Pretty well there,” she admitted, picking up the book she put down earlier: The Pride and the Prejudice. “Mom and dad finally stopped sheltering me as much. I now have access to the internet and can read whatever I want. I understand what dating means.”

Jacob nodded, trying to put the pieces together and figure it all out. Although he fell in love with Bella around her age, he felt like everything he had been through since had added many years on to him. Nessie was getting older, but he knew that he still had to tread cautiously. She was so new to life. Granted, she would learn quickly.

“Is there anything I can help answer for you?” He knew that they had the imprint talk before, but she had been much less mature then and their conversation about intimacy had to start at some point. 

Renesmee hesitated. “Jake…” He saw the awkwardness playing in her eyes, and he reached over to place his hand over hers to soothe the imprint and ensure she knew she could tell him anything. She looked over at him and smiled, letting out the breath she hadn’t realized she had been holding. “I know we’re imprinted, and that it usually means marriage and a family, and I care about you, obviously. I just want to be sure that if we do… start something once I’m there, that it’s because we both want to and not just because of the imprint.”

Her separating the want and need of the imprint confused him slightly – though, he realized Emily, too, pushed it away at first. It made sense. Once she got there, maybe it would be different. “Imprint’s are… odd,” he admitted. “But I do care about you, Ness.”

“Do you care about anyone else?”

“What?” His brow furrowed and his eyes willed her to explain where that thought came from.

She pulled her hand back from under his and sighed, “Dad said he thinks you and Leah are really close, too. He wouldn’t say why, but-“

He was so sick of defending him and Leah – and now he had to try to do it with Renesmee. Just great. Edward could have at least let him handle this on his own. The damn vamp read his thoughts. Did he consider anything private?

“Leah and I are close,” he admitted. “But we’re not imprinted.”

“Imprinting doesn’t have to… be romantic, though, right?”

Jacob hesitated, “Not necessarily, no-“

“Are you and Leah romantically involved?”

Well, if that wasn’t a loaded question then he didn’t know what was.

“No, we’re not romantic,” he felt bad lying to her, but really, there was no… well, romance, and if he brought up intimacy in the form of sex with her at this point, Edward would tear his head off. He tried not to think about the other night in the shower and the feelings he still couldn’t shake from it, but well, it had just been sex, right? It wasn’t like they had made lifelong promises to one another or planned a future together; that could never happen.

Renesmee took the words in and sighed, “So you don’t have any feelings for her?”

“She’s just my friend, Ness. Come tonight and you’ll see.”

She smiled and nodded, “Alright.”

“More wedding stuff?” Jacob asked, entering his house as he got back from the Cullen’s. Leah smelt it as soon as he walked in and scrunched her nose up. Jacob noticed since he had been so in-tuned with her body lately, and he slumped down in the armchair; Rachel, Leah, and Emily in the living room surrounded by scrapbooks. Idly, he wondered if Emily had told anyone else about the pregnancy but considering the three girls seemed to be pretty at-ease he assumed not. “I thought you and Paul weren’t sealing this deal for ‘a while’?”

“Nothing’s booked, just… searching,” Rachel mused. “Actually, we’re just talking about Leah’s date with Jeremy.” Rachel was very in-tune to Jacob; he was her brother, after all, so her words were mainly for her own satisfaction – to see how he reacted to knowing Jeremy would be there tonight. She was sure there had to be more than just sex, no matter how much the two denied it. 

Jacob tried to play it cool and he nodded, “That’s cool. He’s coming tonight?”

Rachel giggled and nodded, “And it’s the third date, and it’s Valentine’s Day tomorrow.”

“Third date?” Jacob had to bite, trying to forget about the loving holiday the next day brought. 

“Rachel seems to think that means sex,” Leah pointed out, rolling her eyes before turning back to her friend. “But I told you, the first coffee date wasn’t a real date.”

”Close enough,” Rachel said easily. “You text him all the time, right? In dance class you can barely keep your hands off each other.”

”It’s dance class!” Leah cried. “We’re partners a lot-”

”Whatever, third date, second date, whatever you want to call it, I promise I’ll save you a room at the cabin,” Rachel teased.

Jacob felt the jealousy bubble in his chest, and he quickly told himself how ridiculous and unwarranted it was. After all, he was bringing Nessie. “Oh, well, congrats-“

“That isn’t how it works,” Emily agreed with Leah, speaking up for the first time. 

“Oh, come on, the third date is notorious for-”

“I really don’t need to know how you and Paul started,” Jacob cringed, getting up from the armchair both to avoid his sisters intimate life details, and to play off Leah’s date. What the fuck was wrong with him? He was bringing Renesmee, after all, but he couldn’t shake the smothering feeling of jealousy rising in his chest.

As Jacob left, Rachel sighed, and looked to Leah. “You’re both so full of crap.”

“Are you really sleeping together?” Emily asked. Leah deftly nodded in response. Of course, Emily knew; everyone did now. Leah was only there because Rachel begged her to come over and help choose decorations. To Rachel’s credit, she hadn’t said Emily would be there, too. Rachel Black; the forever matchmaker and relationship-saver. 

“Just say it,” Leah sighed. “You must have an opinion, because everyone else does. I’m pretty sure that Seth almost hurled when I told him”

“No opinion,” Emily said easily, not wanting to make waves. “Just… wasn’t expecting that.”

“You and me both,” Leah said easily. 

”I don’t think you’re giving Jeremy a real shot,” Rachel countered when Emily got up to go to the bathroom and they were left alone in the living room. 

“I’m trying. I’m not sure I’m ready for that deep emotional connection again.”

“Being scared to get hurt is normal, but not trying isn’t fair to you or Jeremy.”

Rachel was right, but it was hard to hear. She wondered if she would ever be truly happy with ‘normal’ after everything she had been through. “I’m working on it. Hopefully tonight goes well.”

“You can’t compare your relationship with Jacob to yours with Jeremy, either, Lee – Jake is a… short-term thing; Jeremy could be forever.”

“I don’t know if I have a forever,” she admitted lamely.

“Just because Sam didn’t work out doesn’t mean he’s the only guy on earth.”

“I know, we just… we were so perfect until we weren’t. It’s hard to compare anyone to what Sam and I had.”

“So… you’re in this square with Sam, Jacob, and Jeremy,” Rachel pointed out. “But, at some point, you’re going to have to decide who you want to spend your energy on and we both know who the best person for that is.”

Leah nodded, but her gut, her head, and her heart all had different opinions. “I’m going to go – I’m meeting Jeremy before the party for an early Valentine’s dinner.” Rachel gave her a devilish grin and she sighed. “It’s just dinner - and an extremely cheesy holiday.”

“Well, if you don’t show up to the party, I’ll consider you too stricken by the romance of Valentine’s day,” Rachel winked, again playing up the sexual innuendos. 

“Well, if you can’t find Jake, then probably.” She only said it to spite Rachel, who immediately cringed.

“Lee,” she groaned. “Mental images.”

It was safe to say on the third date that her and Jeremy were getting closer. They hadn’t gotten a chance to see each other despite the dance classes since Jacob’s birthday, but between text messages and phone calls, she really hoped she could get there with him. He was such a sweet guy. 

As she walked into the small, quiet restaurant just outside of La Push with Jeremy, together, she felt oddly comfortable with him. The hostess showed them to their table and once she left, they both took off their jackets and slipped into the booth.

“Thanks for coming to Jacob’s birthday,” Leah said contently. “I know it was probably… well, strange to be thrown in with my friends.”

“They seem nice, really. Plus, at least we get dinner together before the party tonight. You know, I really think you’re just using these group settings to avoid spending time alone with me,” he teased.

Leah smirked, “I guess you’ll never know for sure.”

“How has everything been?” He knew Sam was back from her texts, so he wanted to check in.

She was hardly about to tell him about her confrontation with her ex about sleeping with Jacob, and the thought made her chest sink again with guilt. “Pretty uneventful,” she lied. “You? How’s Mikayla?”

They still had dance classes twice a week, but Leah didn’t get much alone time with Jeremy during them. Initially, the classes were for her to get out all her bad energy and focus it into something constructive, but, well, that was kind of Jacob’s job, now. Class was still fun, but dancing wasn’t her first choice for an energy outlet. Rachel was right, though, they were electric together on the dance floor. “She’s good; with her grandmother tonight. You know, I know we haven’t really been dating long-“

“Dating? We said this was not-dating, remember? I just made an exception last time,” Leah teased. 

Jeremy smirked, “Do you kiss all of your ‘non-dating’ friends?”

Oh, if only he knew. She tried to grin and play it off, but Jacob was getting in the way of her and Jeremy; that was evident. She had to pick her between her fling with Jacob, or her possible relationship with Jeremy; there was no other option. Rachel was right; she wasn’t giving him a real shot when she continually ended up in Jacob’s arms. “I don’t kiss and tell.”

He chuckled, and the waiter came by to take their order. They had been flipping through the menus, and Leah settled on fish and potatoes, Jeremy ordering a steak and fries. Once he left, Jeremy turned back to her. “I just think if we’re going to be serious in continuing this that maybe I can introduce you to Mikayla? Not as my girlfriend or anything too serious, but just as a friend?”

The question both excited and made her nervous, and she took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “Jeremy… I want to be transparent with you and I do enjoy hanging out with you, but-“

“But Sam.” He finished it for her. He knew she wasn’t over him, and he was okay with that, but he wanted to ensure Leah understood that if they were to continue their relationship, Mikayla was going to be a big part of it. As someone who didn’t have kids, he wanted to ensure she was up for the responsibility because if not, there really was no relationship to explore. He was new to dating; especially with a child, so he wanted to try and do it right. It was easy to know he had a daughter, but to understand the implications of that, she had to meet her and get to know what his life looked like with Mikayla in it. 

“Are you seeing anyone else?” Leah asked finally, knowing it was time to own up to her behavior, ignoring his reference to Sam. 

Jeremy looked surprised at the question and he shook his head, “No, are you?” He knew they weren’t necessarily exclusive, but it hurt his pride a little to think about her seeing other people when things were so easy and nice between them.

Leah wished he had said yes just to ease her own guilt, but she sighed and nodded. “Yes, but it’s not serious.”

Jeremy took the information in and nodded, “So are we serious to you?”

“Of course,” she said quickly. “That’s why I want to take things slow.”

“When you say seeing this other guy, and not serious…”

Leah gulped and avoided his eyes while she tried to collect her thoughts and explain herself. “It just kind of happened, before you and I met. It’s just physical. I just want to be honest, because if we decide to make us official, I just… wanted you to know. I have no problems ending things with him, if we are serious about making this whole not-dating thing a real-dating thing.”

Jeremy couldn’t help but to smirk at her rambling, but the seriousness of the conversation wasn’t lost on him, especially since she didn’t use a past-tense when describing the physical nature of her relationship with another guy. He didn’t want to pry, though, so he left it alone for now. “So, it’s not about Sam?”

His name still made her chest twinge, but a little less than before. Slowly, but surely, she felt Sam Uley losing his imprint on her heart. She just knew the ache in her chest reserved for him had dulled since the wedding and she wanted to blame it on her newfound clarity but if she was being honest, she knew that wasn’t entirely the case. “No more than it ever is.”

“And there are no feelings between you and this other guy?”

“None,” she confirmed. “But I enjoy spending time with you, so if we want to decide about making this official and figuring out the next step with Mikayla, then I wanted to be honest.”

Jeremy nodded, “Well, Leah Clearwater, I would like to propose the idea of us becoming exclusively exclusive. I don’t need an answer right now, but just think about it okay? I’m done playing the field and we don’t need titles, but I’d feel better knowing we’re only seeing each other moving forward.”

The words made her heart clench and she smiled – a boyfriend. A real boyfriend. He didn’t say the word, but essentially it was the same thing. “Yes.”

“Yes?”

“I’d like to just see each other; did you forget what you asked me already?” She teased.

Jeremy smirked, “I just wasn’t expecting an answer right away.”

Leah leaned over the table, and Jeremy met her in the center, their lips pressing together sweetly. She was sure the passion her and Jacob had would fizzle out eventually, right? When she sat back, she felt giddy, like she was sixteen again and Sam asked her on their first date when they were underneath the school bleachers during gym class.

“I want to keep Mikayla out of it for another little while though, okay?” Leah asked. “I understand how serious of a commitment it is, trust me, so I don’t want to jump into meeting her blindly.”

Jeremy appreciated that and agreed as the waiter brought by their food. They exchanged some more casual conversation over dinner and Leah was glad he didn’t pry anymore into her other relationship – which was now officially over. She felt her heart sink at the thought; actually ending things with Jacob. She thought back to waking up on his chest in her bedroom and realized she would never spend the night with him in their clearing again, or skinny dip in the ocean, or scratch up her back on the trees. It was a little sad, if she was being honest, but she tried to push the thought away - he wasn’t her future.

The two finished their meals, laughed, talked, and told stupidly silly stories from their past and Leah made sure to get the bill this time as they left – despite his protests. 

“So, who’s going to be there tonight?”

“Everyone you met last time, minus Seth’s friends, plus Sam and Emily,” she admitted. Seth would be there, but the younger wolves weren’t going. It was really only for the older wolves, but Leah was pretty sure Jacob convinced Rachel to let him ask Seth to patch up their relationship further. 

They got into his car and he started driving to the cabin – where thankfully, Emily agreed to set up with Seth so she could go out beforehand. It still annoyed her to see the two rings on her cousins’ hand, but it annoyed her a little less walking in there tonight with what could be her own happy ending. 

Sam knew she was dating, apparently. Rachel had filled Emily in, Sam must have found out from her, and then the rest of the guys knew either from Sam himself or from rogue thoughts that had slipped from her or Jacob in wolf-form. Unfortunately, it still hadn’t stopped them from either being disgusted by their alpha and beta swapping spit or amusing themselves to no end with sex jokes. Hopefully they would be on their best behavior tonight.

“Want me to punch Sam out if he comes too close?” He asked jokingly, trying to make her smile.

Leah laughed, “I mean, if you want to defend my honor, I won’t stop you. Might be amusing.”

“He was really stupid to leave you,” Jeremy said seriously, looking over at her and tangling his fingers together with hers as he drove with his left hand. 

Leah felt her demeanor soften and she smiled, squeezing his hand. “I don’t know, maybe he dodged a bullet.” It was supposed to be a joke, but there was a sad note to her voice.

“Why would you say that?”

She hesitated for a moment, but then sighed. She owed him some more honesty and some information that may change his mind about her considering his adoration for Mikayla. “Can you pull over?”

Jeremy raised a brow but obliged and pulled over onto the side of the road, “What’s wrong?”

Her honesty hadn’t come this far earlier; she hadn’t even thought of it and with all of the lies she had told him up until now to cover her second life as a supernatural creature, she wanted to try to extend a bridge to him – an opportunity for true transparency and to start something between them that was untainted by secrets. “If you want to make this serious, you should know that I have… a condition, and there’s a good possibility that I won’t be able to ever have kids. I won’t know for sure until the time comes, but it doesn’t seem promising now. I know Mikayla is really important to you, and I’m not sure if you want a bigger family or not, so you should know that before either of us gets too invested.” It was a lot for one night – and they hadn’t even gotten to the party yet.

Jeremy took the information in and nodded. “Are you okay with that?”

She shrugged, “That’s kind of why Mikayla doesn’t scare me, I guess. I always wanted a family, so if I can’t-“

“Well, you don’t know that 100%,” he said softly, squeezing her hand again. “But if you’re asking me if it’s a deal breaker, then the answer is no. What I went through watching Mikayla’s mom after giving birth and not making it… I never want to lose another woman that I care about like that ever again. I wouldn’t change Mikayla for the world, but it was a devastating loss. So, kids or not, it doesn’t change my mind about you, Leah. I’m content with Mikayla, if more isn’t a possibility.”

Why was he so freaking nice!? She had surely met the nicest guy on the planet. She felt him destroying all her defenses to get to her softer side – one even she was unfamiliar with. He made her feel light and excited about things - like she was more than just a broken woman who needed fixing. The flicker of intimacy between them made her think back to her and Jacob’s conversation when they got ice-cream - maybe she could have a fresh start after all with Jeremy. Maybe it wasn’t La Push all along – maybe it was just her intent to surround herself with things that made her miserable. Maybe Jeremy could make staying in La Push less revolting – after all, Rachel had done it for Paul, right?

She leaned over to kiss him and this time, it wasn’t their usual, gentle kiss. Jeremy reached over and tangled his fingers in her short hair, kissing her fiercely, and it was the first moment of real passion between them. She felt it in her belly, and as he broke the kiss, she was a little bewildered. Maybe some relationships did take longer to heat up than others. 

“Slow, right?” He said softly, his forehead resting on hers. 

She tried to get back to her earlier words about taking things slow, but her body had reacted to the kiss; desire building gingerly inside of her. “Slow, but steady,” she said finally, leaning back in to press her lips to his. He balled his hand into a fist, her hair tangled between his fingers again, his other hand resting on her thigh and slowly moving up to rest on the curve of her hip. Leah reached for him, arms wrapping around his neck, and she tried to push the thoughts of her and Jacob working around the gearshift in his rabbit away – Jeremy’s car was a little more roomy, but the center console still held a challenge to work around. 

Jeremy was the one who pulled back, but she could tell that he hadn’t wanted to. “We’re not going to make it to the cabin if we keep doing this,” he breathed, opening his eyes to look into her pools of brown.

His own blue eyes reminded her of the ocean – and she could see the depths of passion in them. “Maybe that’s not such a bad idea,” she said softly, the words stumbling out on their own. She had a feeling her confidence in that moment stemmed from her time with Jacob. Was she ready to be physical with Jeremy? Probably not, but he felt good against her and she wanted the familiar fire she felt with Jacob to spark between them, too. Jeremy was amazing – so why shouldn’t she do this with him? She did it with Jacob, and they barely got along when it happened the first time. Jeremy was her boyfriend, now, after all, so was it so wrong to be with him intimately? Maybe it would bring them closer together and she could stop thinking about Jacob as much. It was a pathetic thought, but it slipped through. It was just sex, right?

She thought back to her words to Jacob about sleeping with someone you loved versus someone you didn’t, though, and sighed inwardly. No, it wasn’t just sex. She may not love Jeremy, but their relationship was certainly more than something that was strictly physical and she wanted their first time together to be fueled by both an intense emotional connection and an uncontrollable physical desire - the best of her relationships with both Sam and Jacob. Unfortunately, she had a nauseating feeling that her and Jacob’s relationship wasn’t just physical anymore after the time in her bedroom, and knew that her and Sam’s connection was long-gone, and she was more confused than ever. 

“It wouldn’t be,” he admitted. “If I, uh, had condoms with me, but I didn’t really think we’d get that much alone time, so I didn’t come prepared. Whether kids may or may not be a possibility, it’s better to be safe than sorry.” 

Leah’s internal confliction instantly dissolved – Jeremy’s words having made the decision for her. Whether all her reasonings were pure or not was now irrelevant – they couldn’t do it, and although she desperately wanted to curate the passion that her and Jacob shared into the relationship she was building with Jeremy, she knew it had to happen naturally - she couldn’t force it. When the time came for them to take that step, she wouldn’t have to question it; she had never had any qualms about sleeping with Sam. Or Jacob, for that matter, aside from others finding out. 

“I’m sorry,” Leah said softly, sinking back into her seat, closing her eyes.

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” Jeremy said, slightly confused as he watched her pull away from him – physically and emotionally.

“You probably think I’m some sex-craved freak,” she admitted lamely.

Jeremy actually laughed, which kind of bugged her. “Why would you think that?”

“Well I just told you that I was sleeping with someone else before today, and then I tell you we should go slow, and then I basically proposition you to sleep with me in your car.” 

“Okay,” Jeremy reached over to take her hand again. “Seriously, Leah, your past is not relevant to me, God knows I have enough of my own baggage – Mikayla not included. I want to explore us… emotionally, physically, all of it. I think you’re amazing, and I would have no qualms about going to the store to buy some condoms and taking this somewhere more private, but honestly? I don’t think you’re ready. When we met, you were quick to tell me about feelings for your ex, which I appreciate, and then today, you tell me about this other guy, and I don’t care about him if he’s someone that you’re willing to walk away from for us, but I don’t want you to do something you may regret – I don’t mind slow.”

She felt torn on what she really wanted after muddling her relationship with Jeremy with the passion her and Jacob shared and comparing him to Sam, who she had been in love with for way too long. Honestly? She kind of just wanted to go home, alone, and pull the covers over her head.

“You’re right, we should take things slow,” she said honestly. 

”I appreciate that,” he said contently. “I want to focus on us. I don’t expect a flourishing relationship to happen overnight. Dating is hard, but I think we’re a good match.” She smiled in response and he brought her hand to his lips and kissed it, “How about we get to this party of yours?”

They finished the rest of the drive to the cabin with interlocked fingers and in a comfortable silence, but Leah’s head was going a mile a minute. Despite her confusion, though, she didn’t want the guys to mess this up for her. 

He pulled into the cabin and they both got out, Jeremy lacing his fingers with hers. She felt bad to ask Jeremy to drive back so late, but it wasn’t that far, and she didn’t want to stay there overnight like the others. After all, he said he didn’t mind not drinking - hangovers with kids apparently weren’t too fun. The night should be interesting nonetheless.


	10. Cabin

”Leah!” Rachel cried as her friend walked in, Jeremy behind her. There were pink and silver decorations adorning the wooden look of the cabin - which was thankfully bigger than Billy’s house to cram them all in, and Leah hugged Rachel tightly before she grinned. “Hello, Jeremy. Nice to see you, I’m glad you and Leah hit it off. You can call me your fairy godmother,” she giggled. 

Leah rolled her eyes, “Let’s focus you tonight, okay?”

”Congratulations on the engagement,” Jeremy said politely. She hadn’t mentioned it before in class and he hadn’t exactly been scanning women’s hands for rings, so he had been none the wiser.

”Thank you,” she said happily. “It’s been a whirlwind. You know anything about planning weddings? I could sure use the help.”

”I help you all the time,” Leah protested.

”Against your will,” Rachel pointed out.

”Not a fan of weddings I take it?” Jeremy asked as they hung up their jackets in the small entrance-way.

”Not necessarily my idea of fun, no, especially the planning of it all,” she brushed it off easily, wanting the rest of their night to be busied with lighter, fun topics.

They went inside, and everyone was in the small living room, sat on the couch, floor, and chairs from the kitchen, wherever they could find a spot. The small fireplace on the far side of the room was blazing and it was nice a toasty in the small log cabin. 

Seth got up when his sister came in from his spot beside Jacob - it looked like the two had finally made amends, or maybe Seth was just excited she was there with Jeremy so that she wouldn’t be swapping spit with Jacob. “Hey, Lee, have a seat!”

Everyone but Sam had already met Jeremy and by the look on his face, he hadn’t known she was bringing him tonight. Leah took some satisfaction in that and she sat beside Jacob, Jeremy on her other side, barely fitting all of them on one surface. Leah didn’t introduce Sam to Jeremy because, well, she didn’t feel the need to. Jeremy met everyone else, so obviously, the unfamiliar male and female were Sam and Emily. Likewise, the two newlyweds could put two and two together. Why make it more awkward than it already was?

”We were playing never have I ever,” Rachel said proudly. “It’s Kim’s turn.”

”Never have I ever…” Kim started thoughtfully. “Uh… went skinny dipping.”

Leah tried to hide the grin pulling at the corners of her lips. She had, absolutely, with Jacob out of all people. Oh, this was going to be a long night. Leah looked down and saw Jacob tense. Wasn’t Renesmee supposed to be here? Rachel had texted her just after she left her place to meet Jeremy to give her a heads up that Renesmee was going to be there tonight, but she didn’t see her anywhere. 

Leah brought her bottle to her lips, along with Rachel (and Paul, to Jacob’s disgust), and drank. Jacob took a drink, too, which surprised everyone, including Rachel who gave them both a disapproving look that she was hopeful Jeremy had missed. Maybe she should have named names earlier, she thought idly. This couldn’t go well. Jeremy seemed oblivious, nonetheless, and thankfully, everyone kept their mouths shut for now.

”Leah, your turn!”

”Uh, never have I ever had sex in a car.” Technically, they had come close, but Charlie had put a stop to it. She also thought back to the kiss that she shared with Jeremy in his car and felt nervousness rising in her tummy knowing that she had to tell Jacob about the end of their relationship. It had been an easier thought back at the cafe when she couldn’t see first-hand how attractive he was in his red button-down shirt and black jeans.

Kim, Rachel, Paul, and Jared all drank and to her surprise, so did Jeremy - of diet coke, anyways.

She smirked and Jeremy rolled his eyes, “I was kind of reckless in high school.”

She laughed as Embry teased the other two couples about a four-way in Rachel's car. 

“You look beautiful in that dress,” Jeremy said as the others all took part in their mindless banter. She had put on a simple, black dress but the neckline was a little risqué than she usually went with. Classy, but sexy. 

Jacob picked the worst spot ever. Right next to Leah, and with his wolf hearing, he was about to leave the room altogether. He was annoyed enough that Renesmee couldn’t come, frustrated by the quick glance of Leah’s cleavage that he had gotten when she came in, and now he had to listen to Leah and Jeremy flirting? He felt sick. 

“Never have I ever flirted with a teacher,” Emily said blandly, no doubt trying to keep the questions clean for Leah’s sake.

”Does a dance teacher count?” Rachel giggled, looking over at Leah who rolled her eyes.

”Of course,” Emily said, trying to wiggle her way into the fun and back into Leah’s good graces.

Leah took a drink easily before turning to look at Jeremy who grinned. “I think your friends are testing me out,” he whispered into her ear. 

”I think you may be right. ‘Wanna take back our conversation earlier?”

”Not a chance.” His words were light, but there was a seriousness there that made her feels secure with him.

”Never have I ever,” Sam started, pulling her attention away from Jeremy. “Had a one-night stand.”

Leah didn’t drink. She didn’t necessarily think that she and Jacob were classified as a one-night stand, and Jacob resisted his glass, too. She kept her peripheral trained on him, without giving herself away to Jeremy that, well, the guy she told him about earlier was sitting on the same couch. To her surprise, however, Jeremy and Rachel drank – something Paul didn’t look thrilled about since he wasn’t drinking with her. Rachel was older, though, and had been off to college and had lots of fun before settling down with Paul. 

”So much for not dating much,” Leah teased, everyone watching their interactions closely, probably just trying to find some dumb thing to say to initiate Jeremy into the madness that was their pack. “Did the one-night stand happen in the car?”

Jeremy shrugged, “Last time I checked, dating doesn’t mean one-night stands.”

”Okay, what happened to the rules?” Jacob asked suddenly, clearly annoyed. “Drink if you have, don’t if you haven’t. No explanations necessary.”

Leah’s brow raised as she looked over to her other side. “Sorry, Mr. I enforce the rules now. What’s wrong with you tonight?”

”Nothing,” Jacob said easily. “Just stating the rules is all. I need another beer.” Jacob got up and went out back. Leah heard the door open and shut and raised a brow. 

”I, uh, didn’t mean-”

”Don’t worry about it,” Quil said easily. “Nessie couldn’t make it, he’s just annoyed.”

Leah nodded, knowing whatever the reasoning behind her not coming probably wasn’t human-friendly. 

“Never have I ever,” Kim said bravely, trying to redirect the mood. “Uh, never have I ever kissed a girl.”

Leah turned to Jeremy. “Can you excuse me for a minute, I just want to make sure he’s okay-”

”Of course, I’ll be fine here with the wolves.”

”What?” Leah asked, suddenly taken aback.

”The wolves - that’s what you’re doing, right, throwing me to the wolves while you runaway? Your friends aren’t that bad, don’t worry, I’ll do my best to put them at-ease.”

Their voices were low, and Leah almost let out a sigh of relief.

Throwing me to the wolves.

A typical expression, but Jeremy didn’t realize how close he was to the truth. Her prior apprehension about not being able to tell him the whole truth reared its ugly head again. When they were alone, it was easy to pretend they were normal and that she wasn’t supernatural and that she wasn’t hiding half of her life from him, but his comment unnerved her. She tried her best to give him a convincing smile before going off to see what was up with Jacob. After all, he had her back a lot lately and it was the least she could do. She went out the back door and walked over to where he stood, leaning against the railing.

“Hey,” Leah said.

“Hey.” Jacob’s voice was deadpanned, and he didn’t turn to look at her, but kept his eyes trained on the brush before them. The trees were swaying gently in the wind, stars shining brightly above them with no clouds in the sky. “You and Jeremy seem to be doing well,” he commented. 

“We are. I actually wanted to talk to you about that.” She turned to face him, and he met her gaze. His chocolate pools were much different from Jeremy’s vibrant blues, but they were more familiar. “But Jake, are you okay?”

”Fine,” he replied curtly. “What’s up?”

“Where’s Nessie?”

He shrugged, “Bella and Edward said no. Not with the drinking and stuff. I don’t know. She’s old enough now to at least come out for a little bit. I could have brought her home early. I just feel like we’re not exploring the imprint at all. I know she’s not old enough yet, but I feel like I only know her as a kid… I’m not sure if there’s anything more there and when I try to see, it makes it so obvious that…“

“That what?”

“That I don’t think the imprint is the same as the other guys.”

“What do you mean?”

“I want to be around her and keep her safe and protect her, but any type of… intimacy issue I just don’t want to discuss with her. It’s awkward at best.”

She remembered Jacob questioning his imprint before; New Years Eve. “Maybe it’s just because she isn’t fully matured-”

“That’s not it, she’s practically an adult now. Mentally, she is, physically she’s the same age as me when I fell for Bella but-“

It was Leah’s turn to cut him off, “Oh, come on, Jake. You at 16 was a far cry from your maturity now. A lot can change in a couple years. When she’s… fully there, then I think you’ll feel differently.” The reassurance she was trying to give him, however, made her feel a little nauseous. Right now, her next words were her choice – she had a choice, but when Jacob moved on, that was it. 

”I don’t know, have to wait and see, I guess.” 

Silence fell between them and she sighed. “We have to stop,” she said firmly. The words felt forced; like she didn’t want to say them but knew what was right, much like the last time she tried to end their arrangement but ended up caving. Jacob may be the only person who really understood her, but she remembered Rachel’s words - Jeremy could never try if she didn’t give him the opportunity. 

Jacob was so close to her; their bodies only inches apart, and she felt the familiar fire ignite in her and tried to suffocate it. She took a deep breath, hoping it would help, but only got the smell of his cologne filling her nostrils. Maybe this wouldn’t be as easy as she thought. Her earlier arousal from being with Jeremy had increased ten-fold and there was an aching feeling in her stomach as she thought back to the time that they were together, in her bedroom after the shower – how different it had been. Saying yes to exclusivity with Jeremy felt right at the cafe, but here with Jacob? She wanted to run off with him more than she ever wanted anything else. Her confliction was making her nauseous and she was getting a headache.

Jacob looked unsurprised, but she thought she saw a moment of disappointment in his eyes, too. “Well, it was a good run, I guess. Once more for a goodbye?” He forced a smirk, his tone light and teasing, although he felt the finality of her moving on. Maybe tonight hadn’t gone great for him and Nessie, but he was glad that she seemed happy, even if it meant their arrangement was over. He tried to push down the hint of jealous of her in another man’s arms – especially when he could see how her dress accentuated her chest and how her eyes sparkled in the moonlight.

Leah was about to laugh it off but sighed. “I don’t know what I’m doing here.” Jacob looked at her, clearly confused and about to tell her she was here for Rachel’s engagement party, when she continued. “I don’t know why he likes me. I’ve barely given him a reason to. I even told him tonight that I was sleeping with someone else before today and he took it… well, great. He didn’t pry or ask too many questions or get mad…”

Jacob shrugged. “He’s a good guy. You weren’t exclusive, so he can’t be mad about something that happened before.”

“It just seems too good to be true,” Leah said thoughtfully, listening as the lake nearby trickled into a few, smaller rivers further down. She loved feeling one with nature and remembered being up at the cabin when she was a little girl with both of their families. It hadn’t been used much since Jake’s mom died and Billy’s diabetes had permanently taken its toll on his legs, but it felt nostalgic to be there now. 

Jacob studied her intently and she forced herself to look away from his gaze. “Maybe you’re overdue for a too good to be true?”

“I don’t know if I deserve it.” 

“You do. Just be you. I’ve gotten to know the real Leah lately, and she’s pretty great.”

Leah met his eyes again and felt so many emotions flowing through her. The way he was looking at her right now caused way too many bad thoughts to go through her head – and they trumped anything she felt earlier in Jeremy’s car. But Jacob was off-limits for the future; Jeremy wasn’t. She had to focus on what was good for her long-term and not just what felt good in the moment or things were going to get really messy, really fast. It felt like she was always justifying her actions, but it was hard not to when she suddenly felt so unsure of herself.

“Do you feel it too?” He asked suddenly.

She didn’t have to ask what he meant – she just knew. “Yeah,” she choked. “I mean… considering we used to hate being in the same room together to now, wanting to rip each others clothes off whenever we’re in the same general vicinity, it’s been an insurmountable change.”

“You still want to rip my clothes off?” his lips were at the base of her ear, and she got goosebumps on her arms. She gulped and closed her eyes, picturing what would happen if she just gave in to her desires. “I have a feeling Jeremy doesn’t exactly do what I can for you… The last time we were together… I can’t stop thinking about it. You ‘wanna know what I think? I think it’s too good to be true with him because, well, it’s not true. There’s something missing.”

His words almost made her come undone. A part of her wanted him to elaborate on his thoughts from the last time they were together, but she had to try to stand her ground here with the decision she had already made. “Maybe I just don’t know what it’s like to not be miserable.”

“Or maybe,” Jacob’s words were laced with lust. “You want so bad for it to work out with him that you’re settling and that’s why you went back on ending things between us the last time - because you didn’t really want to then, and you don’t really want to now.” 

He wasn’t exactly sure where his words came from - but he took in her body language and could even smell her arousal simply just being there with him, and he knew he was right. She wanted him just as much as he wanted her and after the other day, oh, he wanted her. Badly. Jeremy may be the better option for her, but he couldn’t satisfy her like he did - like he wanted to keep doing. He didn’t know her like he did. Maybe it was just him being upset that his imprint couldn’t be there tonight, or maybe it was just his wolf-tendencies to assert dominance. Or, maybe, he really did care about the she wolf more than he should and her choosing Jeremy hurt his already crippled pride.

Whatever the reason, he could hardly ask her to keep sleeping with him when she had a real chance at a relationship, or just because his own imprint wasn’t going the way he wanted it to - it was selfish, but the words had just kind of slipped out. Unfortunately, with only one beer down, he couldn’t blame it on alcohol tonight, but he honestly could not stop thinking about the other day in the shower - and afterwards, at her place.

Her cheeks were flushed, and she felt turned on beyond belief – and extremely conflicted and confused at Jacob’s desire to keep their situation going despite their initial rules to end it once something like this happened. He couldn’t expect her to ditch Jeremy for him when Nessie was quite clearly so close to taking Jacob completely as her own, could he? Him questioning his imprint was just his own insecurity. She couldn’t give Jeremy up just to placate him for, what, a week? A month? That wasn’t fair to her. He had no right saying that. She felt anger stirring in her stomach, too, at his insinuation that she was settling. 

“Settling? Is that what you’re calling a real, adult relationship now?” Leah’s words came out passionately, trying to convert her lust into anger – it wasn’t that difficult. 

Jacob scoffed, “Why did you go back on ending it with us back in the clearing then?”

Leah crossed her arms over her chest, trying to put a little more in the way of the proximity of their bodies. “Because there was no reason to stay apart if Jeremy and I weren’t exclusive, but now we are.”

“Whatever, Leah. You can lie to yourself all you want, but I see though your bullshit.” His jealousy and his pride were in full swing, fanning his anger and unhappiness over losing her, knowing damn well he had no right to even think of her as his to begin with.

“My bullshit?” Their voices were raising, and she tried to keep hers down. Jeremy wouldn’t hear them from inside, but the other wolves would if they were listening. “You’re out here brooding about your less than perfect imprint, and when I tell you I want a chance at something real, like you’ll soon have, you turn it back on me settling? What about you? An imprint seems like settling to me, by definition; did you forget about how much you used to hate imprints? You said none of the other guys belong to themselves anymore. Don’t play up my bullshit when you’ve got plenty of your own.”

Jacob remembered the words, and they played heavily on his mind right now. If he had a choice, what would he do? “I’m just saying, the passion you have with him is a dying flame; it’s not like what we have.”

“And I told you before, passion without love is meaningless. You’ll realize that when your precious half-breed decides to finally get her period.” 

“Leave Renesmee out of this.”

“Well you leave Jeremy out of this. He is great, and he likes me and treats me like a grown woman and not some broken freak show.”

“I don’t treat you like you’re broken,” Jacob said through gritted teeth. 

“You don’t treat me like anything,” she snapped, feeling her heart beating hard in her chest. “It was just sex. Physical pleasure. And it’s over.” 

“I don’t treat you like anything!?” Jacob yelled, coming closer to her face. “If you can look me in the eye, right now, and tell me you didn’t feel anything the other day in your bedroom, I’ll walk away and wish you the best. I’ll even cheer for you and Jeremy if you want me to.”

Leah looked at him, unwavering, but felt his words strike a chord. “Did you?”

Jacob didn’t answer. Unfortunately, being so close together and both fuelled by their emotions was a lethal combination. Suddenly, his lips were on hers, rough and full of passion and Leah almost melted into him right there, not caring who was around. She knew it was wrong; Hell, her boyfriend was on the other side of the door, but, damn, as Jacob’s fingers reached out and dug into her hip, through her jeans, nothing felt more right in the world than the thought of their bodies coming together-

Suddenly, by a miracle, the door opened, and Leah and Jacob pulled apart. Leah turned to face the water, not looking to see who it was, afraid it may be Jeremy, but Jacob did.

“Can I talk to Leah?” Emily’s voice rang out through the back yard and Jacob nodded, pushing past her to go inside, needing to get away from Leah to ease the tightening of his pants and to avoid saying anything else that was unfair of him to say. 

Leah turned as the door shut and Emily came out. 

“I thought you had a boyfriend?” She asked curiously.

“I do – Jake and I were just talking.”

“I’m not sure that necessarily constitutes talking,” she pointed out, pausing. “Do you… do you like him?”

“Is that what you came out here to talk to me about?” Leah snapped, not really wanting to become besties again with Emily right now – they had a lot to work on, and her just getting back from her honeymoon with Leah’s ex-boyfriend wasn’t a thought that was lost on her just yet.

Emily felt her mood shift and shook her head, “No, but I think you need someone to talk to about it and Rachel is… too close to the situation.”

Leah thought about her words for a long moment before responding, “You’re not wrong.” She sighed and leaned on the railing, rubbing her face. “I really do like Jeremy, he’s honestly amazing, but-“

“But he’s not Jacob. Look, I’ve only been back for a few days, and I seen at Rachel’s the other day how you look at each other. It’s… how you used to look at Sam.”

The awkwardness wasn’t lost on Leah and she sighed, looking up to her friend. “Used to?”

“I just noticed how… you don’t look at him like you used to since we got back. I wasn’t sure why at first, especially since I know how hard the wedding was for you, but when everyone found out about you and Jacob and I saw you two together, I got it; you’re moving on.”

“I’m not in love with Jacob,” she said firmly.

Emily shrugged, “It’s okay if you like him, though.”

“He’s imprinted, and I have a boyfriend.”

“Neither one of those things were about to stop either of you if I hadn’t of walked out here a few minutes ago,” she said easily.

Leah met Emily’s gaze and frowned. Even with the anger Jacob had stirred in her, she knew Emily had a point. After all, lust and anger were sometimes interchangeable between them. “He just… we screwed everything up when we started sleeping together. I don’t even know when it happened, but the last time we were together… it was so different.”

“Different?” Emily asked, desperately wanting to be that comforting shoulder for Leah again; to mend their relationship.

Leah looked at Emily, feeling awkwardness bubble in her stomach talking about her intimate relationship with Jacob to her considering all they had been through the past year. “A few days ago, he came over after we ended patrol. It was a lot more…” she paused, trying to find the right words. “Intimate. I’m not sure how we got from just sex to… I don’t know, staying the night together and kissing – really kissing.”

“Did you bring it up to him?” 

She shook her head, “No I just thought it was a fluke - maybe I imagined something more than what there was, but it doesn’t matter. I just told him we have to stop whatever it is we’re doing.”

“That didn’t look like it went over too well considering you were about to rip each others clothes off when I came out,” she teased.

The shadow of a smile played on the she wolf’s lips and she sighed. “He told me that he thinks I’m settling with Jeremy, so I don’t know what to think right now. He said he can’t stop thinking about the other day and… well, I can’t, either.” 

“I don’t want to intrude, but… You really need to consider this girlfriend thing with Jeremy. You’re only one person, Leah. You can’t be a different person for each of them behind the other’s back.”

“Technically, it’s not behind Jacob’s back.”

“You know what I mean,” she said softly. “Talk to Jacob. Figure that out, then make the decision on what’s best for you.”

“I do like Jeremy… If not for Jacob, I think we’d be really happy together.”

“But Jacob is a factor to consider, whether you want him to be or not.”

Leah blushed and turned to lean her back against the rail, looking in the glass window in the door. Jacob was inside, just past the door, talking to Seth, and Leah felt like the air was thickening. “Fuck Jacob Black,” she groaned. “He ruins everything.”

“I want you to be happy, Leah. Maybe Jacob isn’t the best option for that, but you can’t really choose who makes you happy.”

“You’ve got that right,” she muttered, referring to their own muddled past before she sighed. “Jacob’s the first one to have made me feel anything since Sam and I’m scared if I let that spark go, I’ll never feel it again, but we aren’t supposed to be together and it’s like it’s magnetic when we’re together… out of our control. I don’t know why I’m telling you this, I just...”

“Need a friend?”

Leah looked at her and bit her lower lip. “An impartial body?” 

“Whatever you need, I’m here, okay? I won’t tell Sam anything.”

“Thanks Emily,” Leah said softly. It felt like they should hug; be friends, but Leah wasn’t at that point yet, so she stayed where she was until Emily gestured for them to go back inside.

She found Jeremy in the living room where she left him and smiled, sitting beside him. The sexual energy between them had dissipated. Mainly because Leah knew it wasn’t right to feel those things for Jeremy when Jacob just made her want to strip and find another tree. 

Emily sat beside her where Jacob had been and she took Jeremy’s hand, lacing their fingers together. No, Jacob didn’t get to ruin this and then run off with his imprint in a few weeks and leave her alone again. He didn’t have the power here - she did, and she had to do what was best for her. She would avoid being alone with Jacob if that’s what it took, but he didn’t have the right to ask her to keep sleeping with him when she had a potential future. Her stubborn nature also wanted to prove Jacob wrong in his claim that she was settling - she was going to make her and Jeremy work, if not only to prove his stupid claim wrong.

Luckily, Jacob stayed away from her for the majority of the night and the guys really were on their best behaviors - probably because their female counterparts were there. They continued to play games, laugh, and she finally felt like she was having a good time. It was getting late, though, and Leah decided it was probably time to go. They said goodbye to everyone and before she left, she came face to face with Jacob in the small kitchen as Jeremy went to get their coats.

”What you said earlier,” she said immediately. “Wasn’t fair.”

”I know, Leah-”

”No, it’s my turn to talk,” she cut him off, brow furrowed. “What we had, was pretty explosive, yeah. The chemistry was there, but I can’t ask Jeremy to wait for me to decide what I want until you run off with Renesmee. That’s not fair of you to ask me. I told him we’re exclusive, and I intend to do that. We’re done, Jake.”

”I was wrong,” Jacob admitted. “Renesmee not coming really annoyed me and you’re completely right. I’m sorry, okay? I respect your decision and I shouldn’t have said what I did.”

Leah didn’t answer him, but instead, turned and left the kitchen to meet Jeremy in the porch before going out to get into the car.

”You okay?” he asked as he pulled out onto the road. 

”Fine,” she lied. 

”You don’t seem fine. When a woman says fine, she never means fine,” he grinned. “You can talk to me, you know.”

She tried to give him her best, most convincing smile as he glanced over at her and she laced their fingers together. “Seriously, I’m great. I’m glad we had tonight.”

”Me too,” he said quietly as they drove back to her place.

She saw about Jeremy again about a week later. They had gone out dancing, and honestly? He had definitely raised her blood pressure a little. It had been pretty intimate, but a part of her knew the body against hers wasn’t Jacob’s and it irritated her to no end to be comparing Jeremy to him. She was happy with Jeremy – they were good together, and she would make it work. She just had to stay way from Jacob and let her feelings for Jeremy catch up.

Considering Jeremy didn’t have any early classes today and she was off patrol duty, they decided to meet up at First Beach before their class later that evening and Leah was glad that the rain was holding off as she walked down, seeing his car parked on the gravel. It was empty, though, and her eyes scanned the beach seeing him sat on some driftwood watching out over the ocean.

She went down to meet him and smiled as he got up off the wood, hugging her tightly in greeting.

“I’ve missed you,” he said as they pulled back, parting with a quick kiss.

“You too,” she returned easily as they both sat down on the log again.

“So, serious question – are you up for meeting my sister and Mikayla today?”

“Jeremy-“

“Nothing formal,” he grinned. “But they’re both coming to your class tonight. My sister, Jasmine, is helping me teach you guys contemporary tonight and my mom can’t babysit, so Mikayla’s going to come along.”

Leah wasn’t quite sure what to say. After all, like he said, it wasn’t necessarily formal, and they had been having a lot of fun together, but the thought was still daunting. “I mean, I guess I don’t have a choice, huh?”

“Well, I don’t have to introduce you,” he said, a little disappointed. “But I figured I could at least tell Mikayla who you are considering she knows I keep going out to see a ‘friend’.”

“Alright,” she said firmly. 

“You’re not happy,” he observed.

“You want me to meet Mikayla because you want me to understand how much of a commitment she is, right?” Jeremy nodded, “Well I do know. I changed so many of Seth’s diapers, babysat, fed him, made meals, I get it. I know the older sister thing isn’t necessarily comparable to a full-time kid, but I do know she’s the best thing in your life and you have a responsibility and commitment to her and that it’s a lifetime commitment, so I just… would like to meet her on my own terms, I guess, when we get there.”

“We seem to be doing pretty well,” he countered.

“We are, but I’m not going to be someone you introduce to her on a whim and two months down the road we don’t work out. That’s not fair to her, Jeremy.”

“Do you really think I’d introduce you to her if I thought we were a recipe for disaster?” It was the first time she heard anger in his voice, and she frowned. “Leah, I really like you, but you have to understand, too, that she isn’t a part of my life – she is my life. She’s old enough to understand that I’m dating, and I wouldn’t introduce just anyone to her – she’s only met one other girl in my life since she’s been born and she’s still around even though we didn’t work out. I get it if you’re not ready – just tell me that, but don’t pretend like I’m the one who doesn’t realize how big of a deal this is, because I do, but I want to be transparent with her, too. If we’re going to be dating, I want you to meet her so I can see you both interact together because if that’s a recipe for disaster….”

Leah nodded, realizing what he didn’t say, and she frowned. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean it like that, I’m just worried. She deserves someone in her life who is… all-in.”

“And you’re not all-in?”

“I’m not saying that either,” she was completely messing everything up. “I just… I don’t know, I’m scared. I have a shitty track record with relationships, okay? I don’t want to mess this up.”

“You need to separate us from your past,” he said wisely. 

“I know, I’m trying.”

He reached over and took her hands in his, “I want you to be honest with me, but you need to see where I’m coming from.”

“I do,” she protested. “One hundred percent. Tonight, I’ll meet her – as your friend.”

“Thank you,” he breathed, leaning in to kiss her cheek. “I’m not Sam, I’m not going to walk away from this that easily. I’ll do whatever I can to make us work, with Mikayla.”

“I know,” she breathed.

The rest of the evening went smoothly and they quickly fell into the carefree laughter they usually had around one another and as it started to get dark, Jeremy checked his watch and they left the beach to go to class. Rachel was meeting her there and she drove in a comfortable silence with Jeremy, trying not to be too concerned with meeting Mikayla. It would go fine.

When they got to the studio and went inside, Leah saw Rachel there already – and an unfamiliar, blonde female. She assumed, considering her eyes mirrored Jeremy’s blues, that it was his sister, Jasmine. No one else was there yet, and the little girl dancing around the room with Jasmine was obviously Mikayla. She had seen her in pictures before, and she dropped Jeremy’s hand immediately as they entered, not wanting their more than ‘friends’ relationship to be outed to Mikayla yet.

“Daddy!” Mikayla ran over to him and jumped in his arms.

Leah couldn’t help the smile that radiated watching them together as he kissed her cheek and picked her up. She always wanted a family, and she felt the maternal strings tugging on her heart watching them. Jasmine came over - she was basically a barbie doll reincarnated, just more naturally beautiful. It made sense that his family all had good genes, though, because, well, look at Jeremy.

“Hey, you must be Leah.” Surprising her, she reached out and pulled her into a hug, which Leah returned.

“Yeah, and you’re Jasmine?” she said as they pulled back.

Jasmine looked at her brother and grinned, “That I am, what has this big goof-ball told you about me?”

“Only good things,” she promised.

“And you,” Leah said finally, turning her attention to the little girl in Jeremy’s arms. Rachel was watching them intently from the back of the room, brow furrowed. Mikayla running to Jeremy, calling him dad had outed her as his daughter and she knew she would get an ear-full later for not telling her. “Must be Mikayla, right?”

The little girl smiled proudly. “That’s me! Are you the friend daddy’s hanging out with all the time?”

Leah laughed, and Jeremy was beaming with pride holding her – a true loving father. “That’s me,” she mirrored her playful tone. 

“She’s really pretty, dad,” Mikayla whispered not so subtly to her father.

“Almost as pretty as you, huh?” Jeremy teased, winking at Leah as Mikayla laughed.

“Well, my brother must think pretty highly of you,” Jasmine said easily. “Mikayla’s like his prized trophy – locked up safely.”

Mikayla and Jeremy went over to the mirrors and he let her down, twirling her around as she put on some music. Now it was her turn to be thrown to the wolves – his sister. “I appreciate how important this is,” Leah said honestly. “I’ve heard so much about her.”

“Forgive me,” Jasmine said softly. “You just… seem a little young. I’ve been here through everything with my family, and I just want to make sure…”

“I love kids,” Leah returned. “I wouldn’t have let it go on this long if she was a problem for me moving forward, I promise. I have a little brother, too, so I understand the older sister role.” 

Jasmine nodded and gave her a warm smile, accepting her intentions as true. “So, Jeremy says you work at the hospital?”

Leah nodded, “Just some shifts in the night here and there – mostly clerical work. My mom works there and I’m considering doing nursing in the fall, so.”

The girls exchanged some more small talk as the studio filled up. When the entire class was there, Mikayla sat in the corner happily eating goldfish crackers and Jeremy and Jasmine demonstrated some easy choreography for contemporary dance. Leah felt a little more scrutinized than usually considering Jasmine was there but brushed the thought away. She was agile and smooth in her moves, both brought about by her ballet past and her wolf reflexes. 

When the class ended, she said a brief goodbye to Jasmine and Mikayla and walked outside with Rachel and Jeremy. He had another class after, so she was hitching a ride home with Rachel, though she hadn’t remembered seeing her car earlier.

“You did great today – seriously, you need to consider doing the recital. I think if we did a few classes together in contemporary you could really excel. Maybe even get a scholarship. I joined with a few other dance studios around, so we may be able to get some scouts to come watch.”

“That sounds intense,” Leah admitted as they walked outside.

“You’d do great. Just consider it. You were also great with Mikayla.”

“It wasn’t as terrifying as I thought,” she admitted.

He smirked, “I ‘gotta go back inside. Are we still on for that movie later tonight?”

Leah nodded, and he kissed her innocently before he went back inside and Rachel was behind her, arms crossed over her chest. “A daughter? And you didn’t tell me this before… why? I thought she was his sister!”

“I know, he thought that was amusing,” she teased, a smirk breaking out on her face. “I was waiting to make sure we were good before telling you.”

“A kid is… a huge responsibility.”

“That’s what he keeps telling me.”

“We can talk about it later, come on, let’s go-“

Rachel started walking down to the far-end of the parking lot and Leah’s brow furrowed. “Where’s your car?” She asked, following her.

“Jake’s getting us, my brakes had to be done so he was working on them.”

Leah saw the familiar rabbit parked at the end of the lot and sighed, grabbing Rachel’s arm. “I told him we were done at your party.”

“I know,” she answered easily. “He told me when I asked him why he was home more than usual.”

“What did he say?”

“That you had said you weren’t sleeping together anymore because of Jeremy – good decision, by the way.”

Rachel turned to keep walking, but Leah tugged on her arm again so she faced her. “And did he tell you what he said when I told him?” Rachel was visibly confused, and Leah sighed before giving her a brief recap, leaving out the make-out session Emily had interrupted. 

Rachel’s confusion turned to shock, and then, anger. “He did what? Why?”

Leah sighed and leaned against the railing behind her, dropping Rachel’s arm – now she had her full attention. Jacob couldn’t see them because they were behind a few cars, so she was confident he wouldn’t focus his hearing on them, and their words were safe. “I don’t know, but I haven’t spoken to him since. I wish you told me he was picking us up-“

“Well I obviously didn’t know you were in a lovers quarrel,” she said dryly. 

Leah sighed, “I can’t see him.”

“It’s only a ride home-“

“You don’t get it,” she protested.

“Well help me understand! You broke it off, got into a fight, and now won’t even get in the same car? Come on, Leah-“

“I’m afraid if I see him I’ll end up…” She couldn’t find the words, but Rachel got the message.

“So that’s what this is about? You still want to sleep with my brother? No, correction, you both still want to sleep together, despite how dumb that is.”

“You keep telling me that.”

“Because it’s reckless!” She cried.

“I’m trying to stay away from him, okay?”

“Good for you, but I think you’re forgetting that I’m going to be in the car, too, I promise I won’t leave you alone with him,” her tone was sarcastic, but Leah could tell Rachel’s frustration was growing. She never got on board with her and Jacob sleeping together – not that she could blame her, but she was entirely on board with her and Jeremy.

Leah looked over to the rabbit again, then back to Rachel. “Fine.”

“Don’t be mad,” Rachel sighed. “I didn’t realize just seeing my brother would make you a puddle of lust. I thought ending it was mutual and you were happy with Jeremy.”

“I am.”

Rachel looked at her and quirked a brow before nodding. “Whatever you say.”

“Jeremy wanted exclusivity. I had to end it to stay with him, which I did, so why aren’t you happy about that?”

“Because it’s so clear that you don’t want to end it with Jake,” Rachel said fiercely. “I want you to want Jeremy – to be happy. Jeremy may hurt you, he may not, but Jacob? There’s no may or may not - he will. Deny it all you want, but it’s all over your face right now. When did you realize it wasn’t ‘just sex’ anymore?”

Leah frowned, feeling her heart beating hard inside her chest and her emotions all over the place. “It doesn’t matter.” 

Rachel sighed. “You’ve both made this situation a huge fucking mess, so fix it. I don’t care how.” It was the first time in a long time that Rachel was actually angry, and Leah didn’t like being the reason for it. Emily was right; Rachel was too close to the situation to give any type of untainted opinion.

“I’m sorry, okay? Let’s just go home.” Leah turned then and walked toward the rabbit. Rachel followed silently, trying to figure out what the Hell Leah had gotten herself into as she slipped into the passenger’s seat, Leah in the back. Jacob supplied a forced greeting which Leah didn’t return, and Rachel endured the screaming quiet of the ride home. It felt like she was either stopping a fight from breaking out by being there or stopping them from stripping one another down and she wasn’t sure which was worse. It wasn’t just in Leah’s head, though, and Rachel realized her brothers tight grip on the steering wheel and his rigid posture. He felt it, too. Oh, this was bad; real bad.

A few days later, Jeremy was coming over to watch a movie. Leah greeted him happily at the door, but noticed he wasn’t alone. Rachel and Paul were with him and Leah raised a brow before letting them in. The guys were talking about sports, and Rachel, in a last ditch effort to save Leah’s sanity, decided she was going to intervene.

Leah had to fill in on patrol during the last dance class, so she had missed it, but Rachel was happy to tell her that Jeremy had mentioned that he was coming over before class today to watch a movie, so she had invited herself and Paul.

“I’m doing you a favor,” Rachel said as Paul took a seat in the living room on the love seat, Jeremy on the couch. “I’m helping you fix this.”

“I don’t need help,” Leah argued.

Rachel merely eyed her before going over to sit next to Paul, Leah sitting beside Jeremy. Rachel studied the two intently as Leah flipped through the movies on the TV.

As soon as she came across Step Up, Rachel reached over and grabbed the remote. “This one!”

Paul groaned but draped an arm easily over Rachel as she curled into his side. It was dark outside already and save for the TV glow and a light from behind them in the kitchen, it was pretty cozy. Rachel threw a blanket over her and Paul from the back of the couch, and Leah could quite obviously put the intimate atmosphere into context. 

Wanting to show Rachel that she could handle her and Jeremy herself, she leaned into him and he smiled, putting his arm around her. She smiled devilishly to Rachel before her friend rolled her eyes and turned her attention to the TV.

Leah idly paid attention to the movie, and when Tyler and Nora had their first kiss together, Leah glanced over to Rachel who smiled up at Paul before pressing her lips to his. Looking away, Jeremy caught her attention as he smirked and leaned down, kissing her softly. She returned the kiss easily, but a part of her knew if it had been Jacob kissing her right now, she would have tingles all over her body – that and even being this close to Jacob would have caused her body to ignite. Kissing Jeremy was nice, but she was once again reminded of Jacob’s words – was she settling? Or, were her and Jacob just ticking bomb, waiting to explode, and this is what a real relationship was supposed to feel like? She couldn’t compare her and Sam’s dating experience to this one – she had been much younger and inexperienced back then and they had a rare, immediate connection, and she was left without any answers.

She smiled and broke the kiss, turning back to the TV, feeling Rachel’s gaze on her and avoiding her friend’s eyes. When the movie came to an end, Leah got up and turned the TV off, flicking on the lights. Rachel didn’t look too happy, and Leah knew she failed to impress Rachel with her and Jeremy’s attraction, but she was too conflicted to care what she thought anymore. 

“We’ll get going and leave you two lovebirds alone,” Rachel said, trying to keep a light, playful tone in her voice, but Leah could see her disappointment in her eyes. Paul and Jeremy said goodbye and Rachel came over to hug her friend. “If you don’t like him like that, end it,” she whispered.

Leah sighed as they left, and turned to Jeremy. It was getting late, but she was wide awake. She went into the kitchen and Jeremy followed as she cracked open the fridge and offered him a beer. He declined, but she popped the top off one and took a few mouthfuls. 

“Paul seems nice,” Jeremy commented as she sat up on the counter.

“He’s… okay,” she said, grinning. “We don’t see eye to eye very often.”

Jeremy chuckled and walked over, putting his hands on opposite sides of her on the counter, their bodies super close. “You strike me as a person who either has admirers or enemies and no in-between.”

Leah smirked and shrugged, “I have plenty of acquaintances.”

Without saying anything else, he leaned in to kiss her. It was more passionate than their earlier peck on the couch, and their slow movements gradually became more insistent and fierce, until a soft moan actually escaped her lips, silenced by his mouth.

“The living room is a little more comfortable,” Leah managed as she pulled back.

He grinned and helped her off the counter, going back out onto the couch. She sat down and he stood before her, leaning down to kiss her until she laid back on the couch and he hovered over her. It felt good; her body was craving physical intimacy since her and Jacob broke things off, and she was responding easily to Jeremy as he put a hand on her hip, his forearm resting by her head to support his weight as they kissed. Their bodies were pressed together, and she felt her hips idly arching up, to remove all space between them. 

When she moaned again, Jeremy let himself sink down onto her, still holding his weight, but so that there was no more space between their bodies and he gently ran his tongue across her lips. They had come a long way since their first date, and Leah was surprised at her own arousal in the moment. 

Her fingers deftly went down to slip under his t-shirt, feeling his muscles as she skimmed over his tummy and suddenly, he pulled back, reaching down his back to pull the shirt off entirely. Leah’s breath caught in her throat, but she idly took in how attractive his bare chest was, and when his lips met hers again, his fingers started to make quick work of her own shirt, tugging it off, over her head. The feeling of his bare flesh on hers, however, was like an ice bath waking her up. A part of her, deep down, knew it wasn’t Jacob on top of her and when she looked up into Jeremy’s eyes, she saw pools of brown and not the blue that should have been there.

“Wait,” Leah pushed uselessly on his chest just as his fingers went to her jeans button, causing him to pull back. “I’m not ready.”

Jeremy hesitated before rolling off her quickly, to sit beside her on the couch. He took a deep breath in and ran a hand through his hair. “Sorry… I just figured you…”

“No, I gave you mixed signals. I’m sorry. I just…”

“Want to take things slow?” He provided for her, only a hint of frustration in his voice

He had been amazing with taking things slow thus far, and she couldn’t expect him to do it forever as she got her thoughts together, and Rachel’s words came back to her: end it. But she couldn’t. It wasn’t fair for Jacob to ruin this for her. She wanted to want this – heck, her body did want him, so why couldn’t she just do this with him? Jeremy turned to look at her and handed her shirt back to her before grabbing his own. “I should go.”

He got up and Leah sighed, shrugging her shirt on. She stood, grabbing his hand. “No, wait, please… I want to, I do,” he looked at her, his deep blue eyes peering into hers. “I’ve just only been with two guys before and I knew them both for so long. It’s just new with us and I know it’s just sex, but sex usually complicates things.”

“You’re really worried about screwing this up, but I think you need to just let me in, Leah. You’re so guarded. I’m trying, I really am, but I need that from you, too. It isn’t ‘just sex’.”

Her face fell, and she nodded.

She was hit with the overwhelming power of her own words: Sex without love is meaningless.

Somewhere, between when she told Jacob the difference between how she felt sleeping with him and Sam, she had fallen into a grey area. Jacob wasn’t just sex, it was so clear that it made her chest hurt, but Jeremy? If she did this with him, right now, it would be just sex. 

The difference between Jeremy and Jacob was clear: Jacob understood her, probably better than she understood herself, and Jeremy, with her wolf-nature, never would. It was sobering and she felt an emptiness rise in her chest. Did she love Jacob?

Instead of fighting with Jeremy to stay, she let him leave, and ended up in her bed, alone, blinking back tears.


	11. Memorial

Two weeks had passed and getting up on the morning of March 6th, Leah wished she could just sleep through the entire day.

Her mom had planned a memorial service for her father today because it was officially one year since his passing. Leah knew she had to go pay her respects and keep her father’s memory alive – after all, it was only one year, but every muscle in her body felt ready to bolt out of town for the day and find something that she felt joy doing instead of being plagued with guilt, anger, and sadness in front of everyone. Ever since she woke up, she felt the weight on her chest. Things had been so different a year ago today; before she destroyed everything, including their couch.

She tried to ignore her father’s absence on a good day, but pretending like not seeing her father’s fishing boots in the entrance way of their house didn’t kill her every time she walked through the door, or like Charlie was just her mom’s friend and wasn’t trying to take her dad’s place, and that the lack of mirth in the house for the first six months after he died before her mom found Charlie to get her through wasn’t palpable, wasn’t easing her guilt any.

As she sat in the back of the car, Charlie trying to make small talk in the front with her mom, she looked over to Seth and he took her hand as though it was his job to comfort her today and not the other way around – as it should be. Part of her wondered if their father’s death was why he idolized Jacob so much – an older male figure. She was also trying to come to terms with the fact that she was seeing Jacob today, despite having avoided him the past two weeks.

Since Jeremy had walked out two weeks prior, she had managed to patch things up. Kind of. They texted back and forth and seen each other during the dance classes, but they hadn’t hung out since. She was assuming Jeremy was giving her space, and she was trying to take it and decide how to mitigate her current love life. 

When they got to the graveyard, she saw that everyone was already there and sighed as she got out of the car. Her mom came over to her as Charlie and Seth made their way over to everyone. “Lee, remember, today is a celebration of life, not to be sad; your father wouldn’t have wanted that.”

Honestly, a part of her had to choke back a lifeless laugh at her mother’s words. Standing in a graveyard, reminiscing on her father’s life most certainly wasn’t her idea of a celebration of life – it was damn depressing. Still, she did her best to be tough, but her dad was a very soft spot for her. She nodded to her mom before going over to stand beside Seth, avoiding everyone’s eyes, but feeling them on her. Seth took her hand again. 

She hadn’t told Jeremy about today; she didn’t want to burden him and make him feel obligated to come – it was hard to justify to him why she felt so bad about his death considering there were more secrets involved. It wasn’t fair to him, and it was becoming increasingly obvious how difficult it was to date someone outside of the pack while still being a member of it, even without her cluster of feelings thrown into the mix. 

Her mom had asked Old Quil to lead the service, and he was more than willing to oblige to remember his friend and keep their faith alive. Sue and Charlie stood by her children, and once Old Quil confirmed that everyone was there, he started with some poem about death being the beginning of a new life. Leah idly listened to it and then he continued with something about the God’s plans for them all. Honestly, it was clear to her that the God’s just liked to play with people’s lives – hers especially. People got lucky, and others didn’t, that was all that there was to it.

She felt someone brush her arm suddenly. She looked to the opposite side that Seth was on and saw Jacob looking down at her. He didn’t say anything, but he reached back and placed his hand on the small of her back. She found the gesture comforting despite still being upset with him, and she knew that she really didn’t have the energy to fight with him today – nor did she want to.

Leah took a deep breath as she felt his hand gently rub up and down her back, the simple gesture calming her and sending little shock waves over her skin. No matter their past, Jacob wanted to try to mend their friendship and redeem himself for being such a jerk at the cabin and he knew today would be hard for her.

When Jacob left Billy’s side, he watched him walk over to Leah and got a bad feeling. Jacob’s eagerness to comfort upset women made Billy prideful of a job well done in raising his son – but there was something too intimate between them. It was obvious to apparently everyone but them. Rachel had told him that they weren’t physically involved anymore, but the way they looked so familiar and comfortable with one another now, they could have been together for years.

“I knew Harry our entire lives,” Old Quil stopped the formalities. “He was a fine man; someone who always did the right thing, stood by his family and his friends…”

He continued on and Leah focused on the tombstone behind him with her dad’s name on it, trying to will this day and the last year to be a terrible nightmare and not her reality.

“I remember when Harry told me about Sue,” he said fondly. “He knew he was up for a battle trying to win her over,” people chuckled, and she looked over to her mom’s pensive face. “But I knew once Harry set his mind to something, that there was no way he would back down. When he told me that Sue said yes to his proposal, I wasn’t surprised at all. Even better than a husband, Harry was an even more involved father. Harry used to tell me he had three top days; the day he married Sue and both days his children, Leah and Seth were born.”

Leah looked down to Seth, who was teary-eyed, and Leah felt herself blinking back tears. She stepped away from Jacob and felt her heart break as Seth turned to her and hugged her before his own tears spilled over. She felt the compulsive need to be strong for him right now, but she felt the warm tears streaming down her cheeks, too. Sue put a hand on his back, moving it up and down gently as he clung to his sister and she was forever grateful that they had, and protected, each other. Sue was also grateful for Jacob’s spot by Leah – he visibly calmed her, and Sue could see the implications clearly, but needed to let her daughter figure it out for herself. By the way Jacob watched Leah carefully; protectively, Sue could tell that they were both not doing so well with this ‘just sex’ thing her daughter had claimed over and over. 

“Harry loved his family, and he still loves them as he lives on in a better place. When he passed, it wasn’t a goodbye, it was a see you later.”

Leah remembered the day vividly.

She may have well as have put the dagger in her father’s heart herself. The blame she felt for her father’s death was suffocating. Since the day she phased and he had his heart attack, she hadn’t cried. She was empty; void of any and all emotion. It felt like when her father’s heart stopped, so did hers. She thought her break-up with Sam had been the worst thing to have ever happened to her – that she was irreparable after that. But no, this was her breaking point. This didn’t break her heart, it shattered it, especially knowing she was the catalyst.

They were at the graveside. The funeral ceremony had happened about an hour ago and Leah stayed dry-eyed through it. Sue was gravely worried for her daughter – she knew Leah was fragile and blamed herself, though she was truly the only one who felt that way. Harry’s heart was bad – they all knew that, and the start of seeing Leah phase was just his heart’s last straw. It wasn’t her fault, but Sue was having difficulty trying to get her daughter to believe her. Or, well, even talk to her. 

As they lowered the casket into the ground, for the first time in a week, Leah felt her breath catch in her throat, a fresh wave of misery smothering her. She felt tears spring to her eyes as the casket got lower and lower and soon, it was out of sight. A warm drop of moisture slid down her cheek, and suddenly, she fell to her knees. Everyone she ever knew was there – Harry had a lot of friends, but she didn’t care. As the dampness in the air turned to mist, the cool, damp breeze hitting her face, Leah felt her heart rip from her chest and the tears wouldn’t stay hidden any longer.

Immediately, she heard voices around her. She buried her face into her hands, her body shaking uncontrollably, and she could vaguely make out her mom and Seth’s voice – both tainted with unshed tears. She felt hands on her back, rubbing small circles, but she was numb to whatever they were saying. A moment later, she felt Sam’s arms engulf her. No matter their past now, she needed him. She didn’t care that they had broken up or he had hurt her beyond repair or that he was with her best friend, she just needed him. She let him pull her into his chest, burying her face into it as he held her tightly. 

She wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, but it felt desperate – like his arms wouldn’t let her go until he knew she was okay, no matter how long that was. It was different than the night she phased, and their break-up (when she never even let him touch her and was able to hide her breakdown until he left). At that moment, his arms were vital in her existence. If he let her go, she was sure to fall into a deep, dark pit and be unable to find her way out. 

When her body finally fell silent of anymore tears, Leah dared to pull back. She didn’t look at Sam right away, but she noticed that everyone was gone. The sun was starting to set, and they were there alone. Maybe not entirely alone – she had a feeling Seth and her mom would be waiting for her in the car, but she finally looked up to Sam’s eyes, and was hit with more heartbreak. 

“Lee-Lee,” Sam said softly, continuing to smooth her hair. “You’re okay. I will never let anything happen to you. I’ll never let anything hurt you, I promise. You’ve had so much pain, and I know some of that is my fault. I’ll never forgive myself, but I’ll never stop making sure you’re okay.”

“Why?”

“Because I care-“

“No, why leave me? Why Emily? I know you still care about me. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t be here right now.”

She hadn’t had time to find out about the imprint; the real reason that Sam had left, because it had been such a whirlwind of her joining the pack and Harry’s death. 

Sam took a deep breath and let it out slowly, wondering if this was the right time, but thankful he could finally tell her the truth. “I imprinted on Emily. It’s… something wolves do. When you see that person for the first time, it’s like… they’re vital in your existence.”

Leah tried to push away the thought that it wasn’t her who was vital to him, but she gulped back the words, trying to formulate a response. “Why do wolves imprint?”

“We don’t know.”

”Why didn’t you imprint on me?”

”I don’t know.”

Seth pulled back and wiped his eyes, trying to be strong as he stood there, unwavering even with wet eyes. Leah wished she had his strength, because she wanted to bolt. 

Quil’s grandfather continued, praising her dad and telling stories. “I thought Harry was going to kill Sam when Leah first brought him home,” he grinned.

Despite the strained relationship between the two wolves now, Sam and Emily both chuckled; Harry hadn’t been too thrilled. Leah fondly remembered the day she brought Sam home – Harry hadn’t spoken a word to him and told her mom that he was going to be the ‘bad cop’. It hadn’t lasted long, though, before her father had fallen in love with Sam, too. He saw the way he treated her and at the time, he couldn’t have asked for any better of a suitor for his daughter. She knew without a doubt that he would have given Sam his blessing – and felt her heart clench knowing he wouldn’t be able to give her future husband that, if she ever found one.

“He told me he was swearing her off dating until she was thirty and that his little girl was going to be just that – his little girl, forever. I think he would have sworn her off men altogether if he could have.”

Jacob was still next to her, taking in her body language unintentionally. A few rogue tears fell over her cheeks, but she gulped back the lump that was forming in the back of her throat, trying to push through. 

“He would have been so proud to walk you down the aisle, Leah, and see Seth graduate. But he will always be here with you in your thoughts –“

The thought of her dad never walking her down the aisle (assuming she ever got that far) crushed her. Jacob saw the broken look come over her face, and he wasn’t sure which one of them reached for the other first, but she was suddenly in his arms and he held her tightly against his chest as her tears fell and her smaller frame shook against his. He reached up to put a hand on her hair, tangling his fingers through it, closing his eyes, willing them to be the only two people around. It killed him to see her so broken – and he remembered Sam holding her out on the balcony during the wedding and how he had thought if it was him trying to comfort her, she would have punched him. Now, she reached for him, and it was a testament to the change in their relationship. Equally as changing, was his desire to want to comfort her and be her rock without hesitation.

“I’m here,” Jacob whispered. “I’m not going anywhere.”

His words calmed her, and Old Quil quickly wrapped up the ceremony after that by telling everyone once they paid their respects that the Clearwater’s were having everyone over for food.

Jacob kept Leah in his arms as everyone else went up to grab a rose and put it on Harry’s grave and although Quil and Embry felt compelled to go and tell Leah how sorry they were, they didn’t want to intrude on her moment with Jacob – it was clear who she needed in that moment. She rested her cheek against Jacob’s chest, and watched as everyone went up, placing a rose on the grave, and tried to control her labored breathing. 

Jacob pulled back and took her hand. “Come on,” he gently pulled her arm as Sam and Emily approached the grave and followed behind them. He grabbed the rest of the roses from one of the multiple bouquets that Sue had gotten for today and gave a handful to Leah before taking one for himself. He held her hand as they walked up to the grave and he placed his rose on the grass before watching Leah, waiting for her to do the same. Seth came up behind them and grabbed a rose, standing beside her. 

“I can’t,” she said finally. 

“You can, Lee-“

Sam and Emily turned, hearing Leah, everyone else having started back toward the Clearwater’s. Sue hung back to wait for her children but wanted to give them both a chance to pay their respects. Sam looked to Jacob, his entire face torn between going to Leah and staying beside Emily, but Jacob nodded to him to let him know it was okay - they both knew Emily would win over. This wasn’t a year ago, and Leah didn’t need him right now.

Leah knelled to the grave and put her head in her hands. “I’m so sorry, dad-“

“It is not your fault,” Seth said firmly, leaning beside her, putting a hand on her shoulder. “You have to stop blaming yourself.”

“He will never see you graduate because of me,” she said, cutting him off. “All because of my inability to control my stupid emotions.”

“Leah,” Sam stepped forward. “There was nothing you could have done, it was the wolf- “

“I hate the wolf,” she said icily. “I hate this stupid fucking wolf. It ruined my life.”

Emily went over to her and knelled on the other side of her. “I’m sorry.”

Leah looked over to her friend and her caring, kind eyes made another tear slip down the she wolf’s cheek. Emily reached over and hugged her, and, surprising them all, Leah let her. They stayed like that for a long moment before they pulled away from each other. 

”Let’s go back to your place,” Jacob said, extending his hand to her to help her up.

Leah hesitated, but took it. “I don’t want to go home.”

Jacob helped her and Emily up and Sam spoke up. “Maybe it will help to be around family,” he offered, trying to be helpful. 

”Come on, Lee, we can go upstairs and watch Friends re-runs if you want, but you should go back and get something to eat,” Jacob promised.

Leah turned to him and sighed, “You shouldn’t be here for me.”

”What happened between us does not and will not affect our friendship. Where’s what’s-his-name, anyways?” He played off his ignorance with ‘forgetting’ Jeremy’s name again in hopes she would smile, but his attempt was futile.

”Why would I want him here seeing me like this when I can’t even tell him why I’m so upset? It isn’t exactly easy to have a human/wolf relationship.” Not to mention the fact that Jacob’s arms held a lot more comfort to her today than Jeremy’s ever would have. It was mean, but true and today had only proved to her that the touch she craved was that of the same temperature as her. 

Jacob understood; he hated not being able to tell Bella about the wolf. “Would you tell him if you could?” 

Sam gently tugged Emily’s arm to leave and give them some privacy, and Seth followed.

”I don’t know,” she said honestly.

”I’m giving you permission to tell him.”

”What?” Leah asked, completely shocked. 

”I wish Sam would have let me tell Bella,” Jacob said firmly. “So, you have permission to tell Jeremy if you think that he is going to be a part of your future. If you love him.”

Jacob’s words caused so many emotions to stir in her chest. Did he think she loved Jeremy? If he did, did that mean that he didn’t still feel their pull? Maybe over the past two weeks, things with Renesmee had changed – she hadn’t exactly been on speaking terms with him, but a part of her thought that she would have heard about any major developments through the wolf grapevine. Plus, maybe if she told Jeremy, they could get to a good place in their relationship, though she knew that there was no way she could tell him on the hopes that they would; this was too sensitive of a topic. She had to know for sure, and a part of her already knew the answer. “Thanks,” she said finally.

He nodded, “Let’s go back to your place.”

”Jake?” She asked as he started to turn away. “Did you mean it?”

”About Jeremy?”

”No, will you stay and watch Friends with me? As friends?”

He smirked and nodded, holding his hand out to her. “Of course, c’mon Clearwater.”

Jacob held true to his promise to platonically watch TV with her, and although it was a little awkward at first, they quickly fell into a familiar pattern of teasing one another and laughing. Neither of them brought up their words at the cabin, wanting to savor what was rest of the day and end it on a lighter note. When he left, later that night, once everyone else had gone, and after she talked with her mom, Charlie, and Seth for a little bit, she went back up to her room. Thankfully, despite her mom’s knowing looks, Sue kept her thoughts to herself about her and Jacob, letting her make her own decisions. Or, well, mistakes. 

Laying on her bed after everyone had gone to bed, Leah could still smell Jacob’s cologne on her bedspread. Admittedly, since ending things with Jacob, the she wolf had a lot of pent-up energy. Dance class wasn’t as effective an outlet as Jacob had been. It left her to her own vices – which betrayed her more than anything else. With the smell of Jacob on her sheets, and her own internal desires having gone unsated since the day in her bedroom with him - which seemed like so long ago, she felt her fingers venturing down to the juncture of her legs. Unfortunately, it wasn’t the ocean-blue eyes that she should have thought of that came to mind, but, familiar pools of brown, and the way her body reacted was unforgiving. 

She knew then, with absolutely clarity, as the smell of Jacob surrounded her and she envisioned his hands on her, causing her body to wrack with desire, that she had to end it with Jeremy, even though the thought pained her. They could have worked, she knew it, but a familiar Alpha wolf dominated her thoughts and it was unfair to let her relationship with Jeremy continue. She sighed, her body sated, but her mind unhappy. She closed her eyes to try to get some sleep and the smell of Jacob’s cologne both comforted and teased her. 

Rachel was supposed to be picking her up for a dance lesson two days later, and she was hopeful to avoid another fight with her best friend. She threw her short hair up into a ponytail and got dressed in a cropped sweater and spandex shorts, throwing a pair of sweatpants over them before grabbing her bag and going downstairs. She saw Rachel’s vehicle pull up and Leah went to grab her water bottle in the fridge, passing Seth and Brady were watching TV on the couch as the front door opened. 

“Leah?” Rachel called.

Leah, water bottle in hand, emerged into the living room and saw Abigail from the class there with Rachel. “All ready to go.”

“Abigail needed a ride – her friends that are usually with her had something to do tonight so they couldn’t go.”

“No problem, let’s go-“

At the mention of Abigail’s name, both boys looked up from the television screen and immediately, Seth felt his breath catch in his throat, his chest filling with a weird, warm sensation that he couldn’t quite place, but knew he had felt distantly before. Brady said hello to both Rachel and Abigail, but Seth’s eyes were locked on the younger girls. Surely, if he looked away, the angel with long, dark brown hair and hazel eyes would disappear. 

“Seth?” Brady asked before seeing the expression on his face. “Shit.”

Leah’s brow furrowed at the expression on Abigail’s face, but when she returned her focus to the boys on the couch, she knew. “Oh no.” 

“Hi, I’m Abigail,” the younger girl went over, extending her hand to Seth.

“I think he may faint,” Rachel say quietly to Leah, suppressing a giggle.

“He imprinted,” Leah whispered back, feeling her own heart sink in her chest. Her little brother imprinting. No, this had to be a dream.

“What?”

Leah turned her attention back to Rachel as Seth finally reached up to take her hand and clear his throat and introduced himself. “I need to bail on dance today,” she said hurriedly. 

“What? There’s only a few left before we have to decide if we want to sign up for the recital in the spring.”

“I’m out for the rehearsal,” Leah said apologetically. “There’s just… too much going on right now.”

“How are you and Jeremy?” Leah frowned, and Rachel knew the answer without her confirmation.

“Thank you for trying,” Leah said softly. “Seriously. He was great, but…”

“It’s fine, you can’t help how you feel.”

Leah was a little surprised at Rachel’s understanding, but grateful. “I’ll talk to him soon, but today…” Her eyes went back to her brother, who was clearly both perplexed and fascinated - and had just put his number in Abigail’s phone.

“Abigail, we have to go.” Rachel managed to get Abigail away from Seth and left, and thankfully, some of the guys walked in right on cue. 

Not so thankfully, Jacob was with them, and her arousal from the night before reared its ugly head once more. What the fuck was wrong with her??? She was a like teenage boy who just discovered how good it felt to hold up in his room all night. If her emotional confliction hadn’t caused her enough turmoil, her body felt like it was literally pushing her toward Jacob to feel his hands on her. The only way she had managed getting by the past few weeks without him was by avoiding him, but that was apparently, out of the realm of possibility today.

But she had other things to focus on right now. “Seth’s got… a, uh, situation.”

Seth looked between his sister and the guys and sighed happily, “I imprinted.”

”What!” Paul cried happily. “Welcome to the imprinted-ranks, little man!”

“When?” Jacob asked, clearly confused considering there was no new female around currently. “On Brady?” He teased.

”Abigail, a girl from dance class. Rachel just stopped by to get me and brought her along, but… well, I figured I should hang back.”  
“Haven’t seen you around much, things with your new boo must be going well,” Jared commented.

“Can we not?” The fierceness in the she wolf’s voice surprised her. 

“Someone’s touchy,” Paul muttered.

“Stop prying.” Leah turned her attention to Seth. “So… Abigail.”

“Yeah… Abigail.”

Paul boomed with excitement. “I’ve got lots to teach you.”

Seth chuckled but rolled his eyes, “I think I can take it from here.”

“Don’t take tips from Paul,” Sam chimed in as he came out from the kitchen. Leah hadn’t realized that he was there.

“Yeah, for once, I agree with Sam,” Leah commented dryly. 

“Hey c’mon!” Paul chuckled. “You could take tips from Jake-y here, but that means hearing about your sister’s love life-“

“Paul, fuck off,” Leah said sharply as Jacob watched their interactions. He wished for the new, clear-headed Clearwater that he had seen lately to emerge, but she seemed particularly annoyed today and Paul wasn’t helping.

“Can you not mention my sister and Jacob anymore?” Seth asked. “It’s disturbing and getting kind of old.”

“I think the jokes are still funny,” Jared smirked, egging Paul on as Leah’s anger continued to increase.

“I agree with Seth,” Sam returned. 

Leah looked up to Jacob, fury raging in her eyes. She didn’t even know why she was suddenly so mad! She just wanted to be left alone to stew on her terrible love-life by herself. Seth imprinting caused her even more turmoil. She couldn’t understand why her little brother imprinted and she couldn’t - if she did, it would be so easy. Why did she keep getting punished? 

“Does Jeremy know about your hot and heavy moments with our Alpha?” Paul taunted. “He seemed like he was pretty oblivious back at the engagement party.”

“No,” Jacob replied for her. “And no one aside from Leah, if she decides to, will be telling him, got it?”

“Didn’t know you’d be talking for Leah now,” Paul commented, sitting on the arm of the couch.

“You talk for people all the time,” Leah threw back.

Jacob was a little concerned about where her anger was coming from. She had gotten so used to ignoring Paul since everyone found out they were sleeping together and honestly? His taunts today were tame in comparison to his usual incessant sex-jokes.

“Can we talk? Alone?” Jacob asked Leah quietly – but it was no good, wolf-hearing was unforgiving. 

“Ou la la,” Jared teased.

“Seriously guys-“ Seth started before Jacob pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Why are Leah and I the center of conversation every time we’re in the same damn room? We don’t tease my sister or Kim or Emily-“

“Mainly because it’s your sister,” Paul mused. “And I’d rather not fight you.”

“And Emily’s off-limits,” Sam said fiercely.

“Kim probably wouldn’t care,” Jared added.

“Not the point,” Jacob groaned.

“Leah’s my sister,” Seth pointed out. “But you guys don’t seem to care about what I want.”

They were all a little surprised at the anger behind Seth’s words and Paul sighed, “I’m sorry, man, we’re just teasing.”

“Well maybe it’s time to stop, their private life is their business, don’t you think?” Brady pipped in, surprising Leah; he was usually so quiet.

“Thank you,” Jacob replied. “So how about Leah and I don’t get brought up anymore? She’s with Jeremy, now, exclusively, and I’ll be with Renesmee soon.”

Leah felt her heart sink. It was pathetic, but she didn’t want to picture him with Renesmee.

“So she’s not sleeping with you anymore?” Paul’s brow quirked. “That makes sense since you’re at Billy’s a lot more now.”

“Enough,” Jacob snapped.

“Just saying,” Paul put his hands up in mock surrender. 

They had placated the guys questions about Jeremy thus far by telling them that she and Jeremy weren’t serious, which was why she continued sleeping with Jacob despite her ‘dates’ with him; however, she hadn’t clarified when they had promised exclusivity, because, well, it was none of their business. 

Jacob looked over to Leah again when she didn’t move. “Now, please?”

“You two make it too easy,” Paul chuckled, referring to the sexual innuendo behind Jacob’s words.

His forearms tensed, making his button up stretch in response. Jacob’s own annoyance was increasing, and he was about to lash out at Paul but, Leah took his hand. Jacob looked at her, ignoring the guys. “Let’s go out back.”

“Okay,” she said breathlessly, unable to look into his pools of brown – afraid she really would kick everyone out of the house, feeling a familiar fire igniting in her belly. 

“Give us a minute,” Jacob called back to the guys, gesturing for her to follow him out to the balcony.

“Only a minute?” Jared chuckled – earning a slap on the arm from Seth.  
Leah jumped onto the railing when they got outside and Jacob was beside her, gripping the it with both hands, eyes closed. “I’m sorry about them, I never really got a chance to tell them that we were, well, not sleeping together anymore.”

“It’s fine,” she said easily. “It’s none of their business anyways.” 

“Are you okay? You seem… irritable today.” When he left her last night, she had been fine – happy, even. 

“I’m fine,” she lied. 

“So, how’s Jonas?”

She rolled her eyes, but a grin emerged on her lips. “Jeremy,” she said strongly. 

“Did you tell him about you having four paws, yet?” 

“I haven’t exactly had much time between last night and this afternoon.”

Jacob shrugged, “Figured you’d just send a text. Hey, just so you know, I’m a wolf, see you later. Xoxox.”

Leah smirked, “Exactly how I would have broken it to him.”

“Would have?” Jacob asked, looking down at her.

Leah shook her head and looked up, into Jacob’s eyes – the ones she fantasized about last night. “I’m not telling him.”

”Why not? I thought you wanted to make things easier?”

Leah rolled her eyes, “I have my reasons.”

Jacob smirked, “Well I have to hear these considering your haughty defense of your relationship at the cabin.” It was the first time they brought up the conversation, and it was uncomfortable for them both for different reasons. 

Leah’s amusement faded, and she let her eyes linger on Jacob’s a little too long before forcing herself to look away. “It just didn’t feel right.”

”I thought this guy was great, though? Made you feel like a woman, and all that stuff.” Jacob asked, feeling a hint of excitement. She didn’t love Jeremy, that was clear, or else she would have jumped to tell him – like he would have with Bella. He wasn’t surprised, necessarily - he knew back at the cabin that there was no way she felt the same way about Jeremy as she did him, but he also was unsure what those feelings even were. Lust? Intrigue? Adrenaline? 

She shrugged, “He was really sweet, but-”

”You don’t do sweet,” Jacob brought up their long-standing joke.

Leah laughed and hit him playfully. “No, I guess not. I just like sick, twisty, and fucked up.”

Jacob chuckled and looked down to meet her eyes. He felt the familiar electricity spark between them, and he looked away. “It’s different being friends without benefits.” 

Leah thought back to how Jacob was there for her at the memorial, and how comfortable and safe she felt in his arms. It was foolish; dangerous even - she should have never felt such things for him, but when she thought back to Jacob’s words at the cabin, she sighed. Jacob had been there with her, through it all. Why was it the one person who really understood her was someone who wasn’t available? 

She didn’t respond, lost in her own thoughts, and Jacob shifted to stand in front of her, still sat on the railing. “What’s going through your mind?” 

“Nothing,” she lied. 

Jacob chuckled, keeping their bodies a practical distance apart, but feeling the desire to close the space between them. “I don’t think you’re ever not thinking about something.”

“I do a good job during patrol, don’t I?” She mused.

“Admittedly, yes. You’ve gotten almost as good as me at shielding your thoughts, but I can’t tell if it’s a good thing or a little annoying not to know what you’re thinking about.”

“We barely patrol together anyways.”

He shrugged, “I guess so.”

When silence came over them, Leah sighed. “Phase.”

“What?”

“Just do it before I change my mind.”

She jumped over the railing of the balcony, and then, ran into the trees. She had undressed and phased before Jacob had caught up – clearly giving her some privacy. He stripped down, and phased, too, before sitting back on his haunches. 

Okay, Clearwater. What’s up?

Suddenly, the confliction going through her flooded into Jacob’s thoughts immediately, and as she thought back to the cabin and how his words plagued her ever since, he understood why she was in a bad mood. He had been right – she had wanted so desperately for it to work with Jeremy, but it wasn’t happening. He had been right about something else, too – that the last time, in her bedroom, had been a lot more than some physical sensation. She could see it was true for him, too. 

She pointedly kept back the magnitude of her feelings for him, but did kind of tell him the story on how she had come to decide to break-up with Jeremy, sticking to the facts of protecting the packs secrets – and the undeniable physical chemistry she had with someone who definitely did not have blue eyes.

Unfortunately, as she thought of the familiar brown pools that she had been used to looking up into during sex, her thoughts flicked back to the night before, and she accidentally showed Jacob the moment she decided that she had to end it with Jeremy – alone, in her bed, wet with lust, and thinking of… well, him.

She quickly struggled to shut her thoughts out, and Jacob stayed where he was, trying to keep his mind blank, but was a little surprised and aroused at her thoughts. He knew he wasn’t supposed to see that, but it was now an imagine that would forever be ingrained in his mind. 

Phase back, he thought suddenly before he did so, redressing quickly, Leah following suit.

Her cheeks were flushed, and Jacob looked through the trees, realizing his favorite tree was very close. He thought of her, alone, in her bed the night before, thinking of him, and he felt his pants grow tight immediately. It was undeniable their connection; their bodies felt satisfied together, and incomplete apart. It was the weirdest feeling ever, but it felt like he couldn’t get enough of her body – of her. 

Almost like an imprint, he realized. The innocent crush that he used to have on Bella didn’t come close to the way he felt about Leah and his imprint was even paling in comparison due to the lack of romance currently. With her it was so primal, so right, so… devastatingly forceful and physically painful to be apart from her. Almost like when he was away from Nessie for a long period of time, but Nessie being close only satisfied his wolf. Leah? She satisfied him. Not just sexually, but she was his equal.

He gulped, trying to force down any remaining lust for the she wolf, but when he looked back to her, he saw the familiar spark in her eyes, too. She didn’t move, clearly embarrassed, but he reached out and took her hand instinctually, pulling her closer. His body pressed up against hers and she easily leaned up to press her lips against his. Jacob returned the passion and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her as close as he possibly could with clothes on.

He felt a little bad that he didn’t have more resolve – especially considering the guys weren’t far and their incessive teasing was getting on his nerves, but he missed her lips. It was weak, but, well, he had physical needs. Was he a sex addict now? 

When a heated moan escaped from Leah’s lips, he forced himself to pull back. If he kept kissing her, he wouldn’t be able to stop until he closed all of the space between them and made up for the past few weeks of celibacy, and with a house full of wolves – and her having a boyfriend, he knew they couldn’t. She may have made her decision to leave Jeremy, but she hadn’t yet, and he had to respect that as much as he didn’t want to. 

Jacob closed his eyes and physically stepped back from her, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I won’t be with another guy’s girlfriend, Leah, it’s not fair-“

“That’s not what you said at the cabin.” It was wrong, and she knew it, but her body ached for him and it was so strong that it was almost painful.

Her voice was angelic, but coated in desire, which told him there was nothing holy about her. “We need to keep our distance,” Jacob said firmly, finally turning to face her. “Jeremy’s better for you. You should try to work it out.” 

He wasn’t sure why he was trying to convince her to stay with him – he wanted to put her up against the tree behind her right now and kiss her everywhere, but his words from the cabin came back to him. It wasn’t fair of him to ask that of her when he would be unavailable soon. He wasn’t sure if the passion he felt with Leah would dull when Renesmee got older, or if his imprint would turn into romance, but he was inclined, by Sam’s recollection, to believe whatever this was with Leah would be insignificant compared to his and Renesmee’s relationship – even if it felt so strong right now. After all, Sam had walked away from a three-year relationship as soon as he saw Emily. He couldn’t delude either of them into thinking of anything long-term; and he felt bad being the reason that she couldn’t get there with Jeremy, even though the thought stroked his pride. 

“Look, if you don’t want this, then that’s fine but-“

“I want to,” Jacob cut her off continually, stepping toward her, their bodies close again, but not quite touching. “Trust me, if it was up to me, I’d put you back up against that tree.” The thought made her she wolf’s blood boil and she gulped, the air thickening between them. “But – not when you have a boyfriend, and I don’t want you to break-up with him just because of this,” he gestured between them.

“I know, it’s wrong, but you were right,” Leah said weakly, reaching up to rub her face with her hands. Unsurprisingly, she felt a headache coming on. 

“Well, whatever you decide, you need to talk to Jeremy,” Jacob said levelly, trying to listen to his own reason and ignore his aching desire. “Is the sex worth ending things with him?”

Her brow furrowed and she crossed her arms over her chest, “Are you calling me sex-craved? Or did you just miss the entire thing I just showed you about it not being just about sex?”

Jacob smirked at her remark, having a similar one on his mind moments ago about himself, though she wasn’t as amused. “I’m kind of hard to forget, I guess,” he teased. “Though, admittedly, most of the things that you just showed me were in relation to our sex life - or taking things into your own hands,” he smirked, causing her blush to deepen. “I mean, minus the whole lying to him thing, which I remedied for you already and you have decided not to take advantage of.”

Leah rolled her eyes and turned away, but he grabbed her wrist, pulling her gently to face him. He sighed. “You can get there with Jeremy if you let yourself. You’ll just have to forget about my amazing body,” he teased.

She had purposefully kept her feeling for him out of her thoughts, but maybe if she had showed them to him, then he would understand why it was unfair of her to keep Jeremy around. Now, she was plagued by wondering what he would have said if she let her guard completely down. Realistically, though, she barely understood what she was feeling and even if she did, nothing she said would matter in the face of an imprint. Been there, done that. “I’m not staying with him, it’s not right. I can’t get there, not right now at least.”

”Okay,” he said easily, nodding to the door. “Let’s go back inside before they think we’re tearing each other’s clothes off.” He had to get away from her in such a private setting, or he would be eating his words quicker than he had said them.

She nodded, though preferred his latter suggestion, and went back inside with him, both tormented physically and mentally by their conversation. 

“That was way longer than a minute!” Paul exclaimed as they came back inside. 

Sam pinched the bridge of his nose, ready to stop hearing about his ex-girlfriends’ sex-life. “Alright, that’s enough.”   
Leah ignored them and went upstairs, knowing she should take a cold shower. She spent most of the rest of the afternoon and evening up in her room as the guys hung out downstairs. Around 9, she heard a knock on the door and looked out her window, seeing Jeremy’s car in the driveway. She went downstairs, the entire pack at her place, now, aside from the younger wolves and Seth who were all patrolling together. Jacob was giving them more freedom and responsibility. She didn’t know who let Jeremy in, but as she hit the bottom step, she smiled seeing him – which quickly vanished once she saw the look on his face.

“What’s up?” 

“How about you tell me?” He asked firmly, the pack surrounding them in the living and dining room. “Can we talk, in private?”

“What do you mean? What’s wrong?”

“How about you lying to me,” he didn’t back down, even with an audience. Honestly, she was too curious and worked up to think about moving, and the guys would hear them wherever they were in the house anyways. Jeremy crossed his arms across his chest, clearly unhappy.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she said honestly, hand on her hip.

“I went by the hospital – you said you were working tonight, but you weren’t there and when I asked, apparently no Leah Clearwater works there – now, or ever. I did meet your mom, though. So how about you tell me what you’re really doing at night, when you’re supposed to be ‘working’?”

Every wolfs eyes were on her – and immediately understood the situation. Unfortunately, Jeremy didn’t.

“You went by the hospital, why?”

“To surprise you, considering things have been… well, not great lately.”

“Jeremy… I…”

“I’m done with lies, Leah,” he cut her off. “I’m not looking for a complicated situation. I need the truth, because the only thing I can think of is that you’re still seeing that guy you told me about.”

Leah felt her cheeks heat up, and she felt extremely embarrassed and on display. She looked at Jeremy, avoiding the other guys eyes, trying to figure out how to handle this. Honestly, she knew her lies would come back to bite her – the dishonesty that should have never happened so early in a relationship, but she had had no other choice at the time because of her wolf nature. “I’m not seeing him,” she said firmly, not wanting him to think that she was cheating on him all along despite her kiss with Jacob earlier.

“How can I trust you when you lie to me about where you are every night? Where you work? What else haven’t you told me?” He was pissed, but she couldn’t blame him.

“Jeremy, please, I’m not with anyone else-“

“Well tell me the truth.”

Their gaze was unwavering, but Leah choked. “I can’t,” her words were barely audible, and she wasn’t even sure if Jeremy heard them – but the other guys, including Jacob, did, and she knew this was the last nail in their relationships coffin despite his earlier advice.

“Just admit it, you’re sleeping with whoever it was you were with before,” Jeremy asked pleadingly. “That’s the only thing that makes sense considering you’re so hesitant to commit to us, emotionally, physically…”

“She’s not,” Jacob’s voice came out of nowhere and he stepped forward, beside them from his place on the couch prior. “She was sleeping with me before, and she hasn’t since you two became official - the night of the engagement party she broke it off.”

Jeremy was blindsided. Jacob was only trying to help her, and she recognized that, but not telling Jeremy that it was Jacob – someone he knew, caused a new flash of anger and betrayal in his eyes. Jeremy looked between them and Leah’s cheeks were flushed either from anger or embarrassment, she wasn’t sure. She knew they were done in that moment, and wasn’t sure if she felt sad or relieved – sad to be alone again and give up such an amazing man who in another life, could have made her really happy, or, relieved that she could satisfy her Jacob-craving again, even if it was only for a little while. 

“Him?” Jeremy asked, turning back to look at Leah, who averted her eyes. “You were sleeping with him and didn’t think that I should probably know that?”

“You didn’t ask! It was in the past - you said it didn’t matter!” She cried, looking back at him, anger radiating from her at being called a cheater in front of everyone, despite them knowing she was only covering her patrol schedules with the lie. It still made her feel dirty, though – like the kiss earlier. She couldn’t win here. 

“Well a heads up would have been nice,” he said, his anger turning into hurt. “I’m sorry, but I can’t trust you. I can’t do this.”

Before she could say anything, Jeremy turned on his heel and left, the door of the house shutting loudly behind him. Leah felt extremely exposed with everyone around her, and she was about to go upstairs to avoid their sympathy before Jacob reached out and touched her hand. “Leah, I’m sorry-“

“You were just trying to help,” she said sadly, blinking back the increasing dampness in her eyes. Where the tears came from, she didn’t know, but she realized relief wasn’t what she was feeling. It was guilt. “I get it, it’s not your fault.” She pulled her arm from his. “Just leave me alone, Jacob.” She turned and went back upstairs, and Jacob sighed before punching the railing, breaking the wood.

Sue dropped by that following Monday morning to visit her children – and slowly take more items over to Charlie’s. She had found Seth, first, in the kitchen, eating breakfast and sat with him. He told her all about his new imprint, and Sue listened, a little surprised but happy for her son. Apparently, they had been texting a lot, and Sue tried to bring up the intimacy conversation with him without it being awkward, but he told her firmly that dad had already beaten her to it and insisted he was fine. He also told her about Leah’s break-up, when Sue asked about the broken stair rail. She hadn’t realized that Leah and Jacob weren’t seeing each other anymore and that she had met someone else, let alone went through a break-up. 

Deciding to go check in for herself, she found Leah in her bedroom. “Hey,” she said, entering after knocking. “I just talked to Seth. You okay?”

“Fine,” she said easily, putting the book she was reading down on her bed beside her.

“So… Who’s this Jeremy guy?”

Leah sighed, and as Sue sat beside her, she spilled everything. When she was done, Sue hugged her tightly.

“So, what? No, ‘I told you so’?” Leah asked as she fell back on her bed.

Sue laughed, despite the situation. “Mothers don’t say I told you so,” she said gently. “I’m here for you, whether you listen to me or not.”  
“I was supposed to be married,” she said, sadly. “Married and pregnant and starting a family with Sam by now. I feel so behind and messed up.”

”You’re not behind. There is no timeline here.”

”You and dad did everything right. I want to, too, but it just keeps slipping through my fingers.”

“We did not do everything right.” When Leah looked at her, clearly confused, she sighed. “I found out that I was pregnant shortly after your father and I started dating. We got engaged quickly because back then, it was a little more scandalous to have a baby and not be married. Unfortunately, I lost the baby just after Harry proposed. We got lucky that we were a good team and that we loved each other as much as we did and were equally as lucky to have had you and Seth after we got married and that we were able to project that love onto you both. But there is no right way, Leah.”

“I didn’t know that,” she said, digesting the information. 

“Do you love Jacob?”

Her mom had asked her that before and the answer was easy, but now? “I don’t want to.”

”Oh, Leah,” Sue sighed. “You have the biggest heart ever, but it always seems to be misplaced.”

“Well, thanks for not saying I told you so anyways,” Leah joked.

“Sometimes we need to make our own mistakes,” Sue said simply. 

“Imprint or not, I don’t think Jacob was a mistake… Even if it’s not going to work out, I’m really glad to know that I can feel so strongly toward someone who isn’t Sam.”

”That’s a good way to look at it.”

”Something good has to come out of this mess, right?” She had a lot of time alone to think after Jeremy had left.

Sue smiled at her daughter’s strength. “Well you did say that you think that Jacob feels the same way, right?”

Leah shrugged. She had told her mom everything that had been rated PG, including the events at the cabin. “I think so. I mean, I don’t know if it’s love, but there’s something there. It’s confusing. He said those things at the cabin, but then yesterday he said I should be with Jeremy even though he did want to continue… well, us.” She had skimmed over the details of their conversation at the cabin for her mom’s sake, but the connection remained true. 

“Maybe you should talk to him? Really talk to him. Be honest, be open-“

“Can I tell you something?” Leah asked, interrupting.

“Always.”

She hesitated, “When I’m around him, it’s really weird. Like… there’s some magnetic force pulling us together despite how hard we both try not to let it happen.” Sue understood, and Leah blushed. 

“That’s probably the love you feel for him,” Sue shrugged.

“No, Sam and I… we were in love. Utterly and completely and it was nothing like this.”

“Well, you and Sam were a lot younger and a little more… well, orthodox in your relationship.”

She didn’t get it. Something was weird here; something different. She couldn’t quite place it, but there was something more than adoration that she felt for Jacob. That was there, too, of course, but there was something more primal than she originally realized – more animalistic than sex, and more passionate and forceful than love alone.

“What is it?”

She looked into her mom’s eyes and hesitated. “Like an imprint.”

“An imprint?”

“The pull I feel toward him. It wasn’t… romantic, at first. I think my feelings for him happened naturally, but… well, the physical aspect of it. It’s like the pull of an imprint. The same way that the night Sam saw Emily the first time after phasing, he had to physically remove himself to avoid going over to her to touch her.” She had saw that memory in his thoughts, when he tried to explain imprinting to her, and it suddenly resonated with her.

Sue was wondering where her daughter was going with this but nodded inquisitively. “You think you imprinted on Jacob?”

“No,” she said. “It isn’t an imprint, but it’s just the best way to describe it.” Sue was a little confused, but nodded, trying to grasp what Leah was saying. “I’ve never felt like this before. We couldn’t stand each other at first, then, what, just fell into bed together? Neither of us were that drunk,” she was thinking out loud now. “And then after that happened the first time, it was like a switch flipped…” They couldn’t keep their hands off each other.

“You said Jacob made you feel wanted, remember?” Sue said, trying to rationalize it in a mainstream way. “That’s pretty powerful. After everything you went through, it’s normal to grow attached quickly to someone who makes you feel special.”

Leah looked up to her mom, lost in her own thoughts. “Do you remember anything in the legends like this? Not an imprint, but… something else?”

“Like what? Leah, there’s really not much to go on here, other than you’re both attracted to each other and seemingly have overstepped your friendship boundary.” The words felt strange coming out of Sue’s mouth, but she wasn’t about to call a tribal meeting with herself, Jacob’s dad, Sam, and Old Quil to figure out normal, biological impulses. 

“You don’t get it,” she said firmly, not wavering under her mother’s gaze despite the awkward topic. “I’ve seen Jacob naked plenty of times while phasing before the wedding, and it never affected me like just a touch does now.”

“Feelings can change.” She was grasping at straws, but it made more sense than some unnatural force that Leah kept referring to. 

“Not like this. Why else do you think Jacob’s the only wolf who wants to have sex with someone other than his imprint?”

“Renesmee is a child.”

She waved that off but was clearly losing Sue on this. “I’m the first female wolf… Maybe that means something? Being in a pack with the guys is packed full of testosterone-“

“Which makes sense for a high sex drive,” Sue pointed out, wondering where Leah’s conspiracy theories were coming from and trying to put her medical hat on and not think that this was her daughter’s sex life they were talking about. She wanted to support Leah, but there were things she didn’t need to know, nurse or not.

“Not this high. Whenever he’s in the same room, my body can feel it. It’s embarrassing how bad we are at ignoring it. It’s like… I can barely breathe next to him.”

Sue sighed, “I’m not sure what to tell you, Leah, other than what I already have. Every relationship is different, so if you’re comparing this to you and Sam then there will be differences. As for something… supernatural? I’m not sure that coincides with what you’ve described.”

She pondered this for a moment before sighing, “I need to talk to Jacob.”

“About what exactly?”

She shrugged, “I need to explain this to him. He feels it, too, he’ll understand.”

“That’s usually what happens when a beautiful woman propositions a boy she likes,” Sue teased, trying to bring her back to reality.

Leah felt a grin tug at her lips, but she shook her head. “This isn’t natural.”

“Sex is as natural as you can get, Leah,” Sue sighed. “Even animals have it figured out.”

Leah’s head was reeling, and she was pretty sure she was onto something, but Sue wasn’t buying it, she could tell. “Well… thanks for the talk?”

Sue laughed and kissed her forehead, “You know where I am if you need me, okay?”

“At Charlie’s,” she confirmed. “Taking more stuff over?”

“A few things,” Sue said simply, getting up, off the bed. “Can I ask you something?” Leah nodded, considering she just practically filled her mom’s head with asks. Sue hesitated before sitting back down, taking Leah’s hands. “How would you feel if Charlie and I got married?”

Woah.

“Married?” Leah asked, clearly surprised. “Is it… that serious? That fast?”

“Not yet,” she promised. “But… Charlie’s mentioned it a couple of times now.”

“Just like moving in together?” Was he trying to steal her mom?

Sue nodded, “He appreciates taking things slow with me considering your dad has only been gone a year, but he’s been… well, alone for some time, now. We’ve talked about it as a futuristic thing, but I need you and Seth on board.”

It occurred to her that her mom was asking for permission to be happy, and Leah felt a protest come to her lips immediately, before she choked it back. Sue never berated her for sleeping with Jacob, despite her not necessarily liking it. She wouldn’t stand in the way of her mom’s happiness – especially considering it was her fault that she was a widow.

“I think it’s great,” she forced a smile.

“Leah, seriously-“

“No, I am serious,” she said firmly, sighing. “I want you to be happy, and if Charlie makes you happy… Wait-“

“What?”

“That means… Bella really will be my sister… and Renesmee… Oh God,” she cringed, remembering Paul’s words about Jacob keeping it in the family when they had first patrolled together after everyone found out.

Sue laughed and rolled her eyes, “Only by marriage – when it gets there.”

“Only!” Leah cried. “I don’t want a leech sister!”

“So out of this entire thing, Bella is what deters you from me marrying Charlie?”

Leah couldn’t help but to laugh, “Considering I’m sleeping with Bella’s… well, I don’t even know what to call him. Nothing, I guess. And Renesmee’s imprint? Super weird. Super deterred.”

“Were,” Sue pointed out.

“Hm?”

“Were sleeping with him, unless you left something out.”

Leah flushed, “No… I just… well, assumed with Jeremy out of the picture -“

Sue sighed, but laughed. “Alright, I’m leaving now. Thank you for your blessing. I’ll let Charlie know if he wants to propose he has to cut all family ties,” she teased.

“Thank you,” Leah joked.

“And Leah? Be safe with your heart, okay? I don’t ever want to see you torn up again like you were over Sam. You seem better.”

“I will,” she promised. “Wait – if you get married, does that mean there’s an eternal pack and Cullen treaty? Seems weird to, well, kill my sister… But if I had to… Can we just decide that you and Charlie’s union doesn’t resonate to your kids?”

Sue recognized the happy, cheerful girl she knew and loved, and wondered if Jacob really had been bad for her after all. She laughed before moving toward the door. “Bye, Lee.”


	12. Alpha's Orders

“Did you tell her yet?” 

Jacob hadn’t spoken to Leah since the night that Jeremy had called things off the week prior. He had felt like reaching out to her multiple times, but she told him to leave her alone and he didn’t want to overstep. He had a lot of time to think, though, and hated to think that she blamed him for her split with Jeremy despite her brave words about ending it earlier that day. Maybe he was the catalyst, but the thought of her hating or avoiding him didn’t sit well with him.

Jacob, Embry, and Quil were over to Sam and Emily’s and Embry and Quil had just found out about the pregnancy. Jacob gave strict Alpha’s orders to both not to say a word to Leah - since they patrolled with her the most often, until Sam and Emily could tell her themselves, which had to be soon. Emily was 18 weeks along now, and her belly was becoming difficult to hide. Sam had told him that they would find out the gender in only two weeks. Keeping it quiet moving forward would be extremely difficult. 

“I’ve tried… but there was never a good time,” Emily admitted lamely.

“Leah Clearwater - even more temperamental than Jake,” Embry teased, earning him a punch on the arm from Jacob.

“Well, to be honest,” Quil responded. “If you’re looking for a ‘good time’, you’re going to have that baby off to college first.”

Jacob chuckled, and Emily sighed. “Listen, Em,” Jacob said honestly. “If you don’t tell her soon, she’s going to hear it from someone else – or figure it out herself,” he said, looking to her small bump. “She’s come a long way since the wedding; she’ll be fine.”

“That’s only because you’re sleeping with her,” Quil groaned. “She told me if I didn’t leave her alone on patrol yesterday that she was going to throw me off the cliffs – and then shoved me into a tree. New and improved Leah? I’m not so sure.”

Embry laughed, “Oh, I don’t remember that being how the conversation went – you provoked her. Do you not remembering asking her how she managed to get herself into a love-sex triangle? I think you called it J-squared?”

”Alright,” Sam said finally. “Leah’s love life is none of our business.”

Finally, Jacob thought idly, he understood! “Leah and I are over,” he pipped in. “Just an FYI for your next joke, since you keep ignoring that fact,” he teased, trying to lighten the mood and not convey his feelings toward it.

”I thought you were just covering for her by telling Jeremy that she wasn’t sleeping with you,” Embry admitted. 

Jacob rolled his eyes. “Nope, like I said, she broke it off at Paul and Rachel’s engagement party. I haven’t been with her since.”

”Dumped by Leah Clearwater,” Quil teased. “Well, Jake, that’s a new low - even for you.”

Jacob rolled his eyes. “Whatever. At least my next time with a woman won’t be in, what, fifteen years?”

That shut his friend up, and Jacob felt a little bad about bringing up his buddy’s misfortune, but he had to play off the him and Leah fiasco as being over - final. Even with her break-up, considering he hadn’t heard from her, he assumed their non-intimate status held true despite their rather intense conversation beforehand. 

“Well, I hope Leah can fix things with Jeremy,” Emily said softly, in order to slyly gauge Jacob’s reaction. 

“As long as he treats her right,” Sam spoke firmly. “I didn’t like how he handled himself at her house. He could have at least done it more privately.”

It was Jacob’s reaction she wanted to gauge, but honestly, she got more of Sam’s. Emily saw the dark clouds of jealousy playing behind her husband’s eyes - ones she understood and didn’t fault him for, but hurt nonetheless.

Jacob played it off, however, and started joking with Embry about finding him a girlfriend, before turning back to Sam. “I guess I’d be pissed, too, if I was in his shoes, but yeah, I think I would have made sure to have not broken up with her in front of a room full of her friends.”

“I knew they were having issues,” Emily admitted. “I just thought… well, things would smooth over.” At least when Renesmee became of age.

”Well, I told her she could tell him about the wolf-thing… if she thought he was the one, or whatever, because she was struggling with what half-truths to tell him the whole time and I really did want her to be happy with him. She didn’t, though, so I guess that says a lot. Maybe he just wasn’t the right guy for her.” Jacob informed them. 

Leah’s cover stories weren’t exactly the ‘issues’ Emily had been referring to, but Jacob hadn’t realized how much Leah had opened up to Emily so he had brushed it off easily to secret pack issues, which were obvious.

”You told her she could tell him?” Sam asked, clearly agitated at how easily Jacob threw the words around.

”Well I knew she was struggling with him because of our secret, and I figured after what I said to her at the cabin-”

”What did you say?” Quil perked up, clearly not realizing he had been left out of some serious drama – which was unlikely with their packs lack of privacy.

”It doesn’t matter. I was a jerk and said some stuff that I shouldn’t have said. I felt guilty, I guess.”

”You can’t just tell the world about us because of your guilt,” Sam said angrily. 

“It must have been bad,” Embry said, looking to Jake. “You wouldn’t let her tell him if you didn’t say something really dumb to piss her off.” 

Jacob sighed, “I was only thinking about my own feelings and not hers, so, I-”

“Your feelings?” Embry questioned, quirking a brow. “Have you finally decided to admit to yourself that this whole ‘just sex’ thing with Leah is a load of crap?”

“It is just sex.” Or, was.

“Whatever-“

“Well, she won’t talk to me again now anyways, since Jeremy exploded, so it doesn’t matter. Leah and I are done.” 

“Well, maybe she can try to patch things up with Jeremy,” Emily offered. 

“Honestly? I’m not sure if she’s actually upset about Jeremy ending things or because of how it happened.”

“What do you mean?” Quil pipped back in.

Jacob sighed, “When we were alone last week, before Jeremy came over… she said she planned to end it with him. I don’t think she’s too bent up on the break-up itself, rather than how it happened. I think she blames me for not being able to commit to him.”

“Why would she blame you? Aside from the obvious,” Sam asked.

“Because I agree with Embry,” Emily said finally. “I think that there’s more feelings on both sides of this than either of you will admit and Jeremy didn’t compare to those.” She knew it was true for Leah, at least.

“That’s insane,” Jacob scoffed. “They just… didn’t have the same chemistry as us, or level of depth that her and Sam had. I think she set their relationship up on such a pedestal that no matter who was on it, she couldn’t reach it.” Maybe that was mean because deep down, he knew that there was some semblance of truth behind Emily’s words, but he didn’t want to show weakness in front of the guys. 

“I’m going to tell her about the pregnancy today,” Emily promised as the room fell silent, changing the subject – and idly getting Sam’s attention back on her and their baby in her belly and away from the she-wolf who plagued his thoughts with guilt and underlying adoration.

“She’s off all day, so it may be a good time to break the news,” Jacob pointed out. It was Saturday and Leah’s weekend off. He was supposed to patrol this morning, but he got Paul to cover so he could go talk to the Cullen’s and he was going to take the afternoon shift. 

“Well, I guess I’ll take my chances later. I just wish she could be happy about the pregnancy with me,” Emily sighed, knowing it was a losing battle with Leah. They had been making such progress, but she knew that when she dropped the baby-bomb, Leah would recoil again. Maybe for good this time.

”She really has started to move on,” Embry admitted. “Maybe it was with Jake, or Jeremy, or whoever, but I don’t think you’ll get the same reaction out of her as you would have before the wedding.”

Jacob nodded agreeably, “I think she’ll surprise you in the fact that she may not mind as much as what she would have because of well… the fact that it’s you and Sam, but-“

“Her own infertility,” Emily finished his sentence. “I know… I guess partially me stalling is for me, too, which is terrible, but I just miss her, and things have actually been okay lately between us.”

Sam wrapped his arm around Emily’s waist, pulling her close. “She’ll come around, Em. Better to be honest and let her hear it from you.” He thought this was something the girls should discuss together considering the sensitive subject matter. He would be no use in that conversation and Emily had agreed despite them initially having discussed telling her together. 

Emily leaned into him easily, feeling safe in his arms, and nodded. “I’ll do it today.” 

“Once Leah knows, we’ll tell the rest of the pack,” Sam said easily. “I haven’t even told Paul yet because I didn’t want it to slip to Rachel and get back to her.”

“I’m sorry that your concern for Leah overshadows your happiness sometimes,” Jacob said honestly. 

“It’s the road we’ve taken,” Emily said softly, smiling up to Sam. “We knew it wouldn’t be easy, especially with Leah, but it’s worth it for us and we both love her enough to respect her feelings.”

Emily’s maturity and grace with the entire situation always made Jacob wonder how she did it – especially when Leah hadn’t always been so accepting; if you’d even call it that now.

“Well, on a lighter note, Renesmee will be fully grown any day now,” he said, trying to play up his own excitement and not acknowledge that when that happened, it really would be so-long to whatever he had going on with Leah. “I’m talking to Edward and Bella later today, actually, about… well, the new growth of the relationship as Ness ages, so we’ll see how that goes.” 

“Need a sidekick?” Embry volunteered.

“Nah, I’ll be fine. I don’t think Bella will let Edward kill me. Or maybe she will, but Carlisle won’t let them,” he joked. “If I’m not back by morning, call a search party.”

The guys laughed, and Emily rolled her eyes, “They’ll get used to it. I can’t… well, even imagine our baby dating.” She placed a hand down on her belly – which admittedly, was slightly starting to show under her dress, though only if she moved the material close to her belly. Jacob could even tell now, so it was a miracle Leah hadn’t caught on by herself, though she had been kind of distracted lately.

Sam cringed, “If it’s a girl, no way.”

“Or a boy!” Emily exclaimed teasingly. 

“No boyfriends or girlfriends until they’re forty,” Sam teased his wife.

“Good luck with that,” Quil snorted, just as a familiar female wolf came in the front door.

”Hey,” Emily said happily, moving so that Sam’s hands weren’t on her belly. She felt the guy’s eyes on her and sighed, “Leah… uh, can we talk?” No time like the present.

Leah was too preoccupied to notice her bump. She had been focused on heading toward Jacob before Emily spoke, catching her attention. “We can, yeah, but can it wait?” She turned to Jacob again, “I need to talk to you.”

“Is everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine, but it’s important. Do you have a minute? In private?”

He hesitated before nodding. “Yeah, but I’m on my way to the Cullen’s, make it quick?”

Leah merely nodded before Jacob said goodbye and went outside with Leah. They started walking back toward Jake’s so he could grab his motorcycle and head to the Cullen’s after. “What’s up?”

“After everything that happened last week, and how it unfolded, I’ve been thinking…”

”About resuming our arrangement?” He asked teasingly, hoping to break the awkwardness between them.

Her brow furrowed, and she shook her head. “No… I mean, yeah, but-”

”So you’re not mad at me?”

”No, why?”

”I mean… I figured I’d be to blame for Jeremy.”

She waved him off, “That was doomed. He could have… well, not called me a cheater in front of all my friends, but what’s done is done. I guess I deserved it. Anyways, I wanted to ask you if you still felt the… pull that you mentioned at the cabin?”

”You mean do I want to sleep with you still?”

”Yeah, but I think it’s more than that. It happened out of nowhere and was… is, so strong.”

”Not sure I’d call it out of nowhere-”

”So you’re saying you thought I was hot the entire time?” Leah questioned, looking up to them as the stopped, on the side of the road.

Jacob hesitated, “Well, I mean… you were never not hot?”

”Seriously, Jake.”

”What do you want me to say?”

She put her hands on her hips and stopped walking. “Do you feel it?”

”I always feel it,” he admitted, wondering where she was going with this, but understanding the heavy, persistent chemistry between them that she was talking about. He just thought that it was… well, normal. Intense, but normal.

”And did you ever feel… sexually attracted to Bella?”

Jacob hesitated, “Okay, where are you going with this?”

”Yes or no?”

”Yes, of course-”

”Okay, so how do we differ?”

Jacob shrugged, “I actually have slept with you?” He looked at her, seeing the seriousness plastered all over her face, and sighed. “I don’t know, Leah, you’re the only girl I’ve slept with. Unlike you, I have nothing to compare it to. Every time we’re in a room together, I find it difficult to concentrate on anything but you – the sexual energy. It’s there, I feel it, but I just thought that was normal when you were, well, sleeping with someone. Kind of important to be attracted to them if you’re continually ending up in bed together, don’t you think?”

“But why do you think we keep ending up in bed together?”

“Because it feels good?” He had a goofy grin playing on his lips and she sighed, wanting him to take this more seriously and only getting the same indifference and attempt to justify it that she had gotten from her mom.

”Do you think it feels abnormal?”

Jacob took in her words, and shrugged before his eyes went down her body. Her tight jeans hugged her hips nicely and whatever bra she had on allowed her some movement because-

”See?”

”What!?”

”You were checking me out!”

”Am I not allowed to do that anymore?”

Leah sighed, “It seems strange all of a sudden, that’s all.”

”Just because you’re attracted to me doesn’t mean-”

”Be serious for once,” she sighed as they started walking again. “Please.”

”Okay. Tell me more.” 

And she did. She told him how weird their pull was, especially with lack of prior sexual attraction and he listened as they walked. She also mentioned, in little detail, her conversation with her mom as well as some research that she had done about sexual compatibility. Once they got to his house, she had finished, and he was more confused than ever.

”I wouldn’t say that we weren’t attracted to each other before,” he justified. “We just… butted heads so much that it was kind of hard to see past that. Plus I was into Bella and you were into Sam and it didn’t leave much room for exploring any type of attraction.”

”Okay, well, put that fact aside, but regardless how it started, it’s so strong.”

”So you think that there’s some kind of supernatural pull that brings us together?”

”It makes sense, doesn’t it?”

He thought about it a moment before shrugging, “I mean, maybe.”

”Exactly.”

”But your mom may be right, what if it’s normal? What if we’re just… insanely sexually compatible?”

Leah shrugged, “I’ve been with Sam. I’ve been… extremely attracted to him, we were sexually compatible, but it’s never compared to this.”

He smirked cockily, “Well, I am the rightful Alpha. Should come with some perks, I guess.”

”Seriously, Jake,” she sighed.

He reached out to take her hands, in the front of his yard, and immediately, he felt the sexual connection pass through him at the innocent touch – he wanted to touch her everywhere. Hm, maybe she wasn’t so far off base after all. Her touch was fire to him, though - the same temperature as him, begging to have gas thrown on it. 

“You feel it now, don’t you?”

She was so close to him, and he stepped forward again, putting less distance between them. “It’s…”

“Magnetic.”

He shrugged, letting her go. “I mean, yeah but… supernatural?” He thought back to when he compared how she soothed him to an imprint, like she mentioned in her spiel, but he brushed it off. She was just familiar to him, right? Surely there was nothing more than that going on. She was looking into something that wasn’t there to what, justify her sex drive? Her attraction to him? Did she have any merit? He didn’t know, and likewise wasn’t sure how to verify or deny it factually. 

“When I’m around you…” she blushed. “I mean… All I want to do…”

He hesitated and sighed, “I feel the chemistry, trust me, but it still seems like a leap to think of it as some kind of supernatural pull.”

”Weirder things have happened around here.” She stepped forward, enclosing the rest of the distance between them as her chest gently brushed his. “And how do you feel now?”

Jacob gulped, feeling the familiar fire flicker. “Like I want to take off all of your clothes and explore this supernatural chemistry,” he admitted huskily, giving her goosebumps. “Like it’s been way too long…”

She forced herself to step back, but the adoration was still in his eyes and she found it difficult. “See?”

Jacob gulped. “We haven’t been… together, in weeks. I think you putting your boobs against me should probably evoke that reaction. Okay so, assuming you’re right, what does it prove? That these so-called ‘supernatural forces’ are pushing us to enjoy each other’s bodies?”

”I don’t know, but there’s something…”

He shrugged, “If you mean that I want to do really bad things to you right now, well, yeah…”

Leah took a deep breath and reached out to place her hand on his chest. “Right now?” It had been agonizing staying away from him, and she just wanted to… No! She stepped away immediately. 

Jacob chuckled, “It has been a while… I’ve seen your fantasy, remember? I know I’m not the only one missing it.”

”It’s not normal,” she protested. 

“Okay,” he sighed. “I’ll… I don’t know. Leave it with me.” He looked at his watch. “As much as I don’t want to go to the Cullen’s, I told them I’d be there-”

”It’s fine, go. Call me later?”

He nodded, “Alright.”

She left quickly, and Jacob was so confused. Was it possible his attraction to her was something of bigger descent? He wasn’t sure, but right now, he had other things to deal with.

Jacob went to meet with Edward and Bella.  
When he got to the Cullen’s, he went behind the mansion to the small cottage that Edward and Bella shared with Nessie. He didn’t knock before entering, knowing they were expecting him, and he found Edward and Bella sat in the living room. He fell back into the plush armchair.

“Where’s Ness?”

“She’s in the main house,” Bella explained. “We thought you guys could talk later about… well, your relationship, once she’s matured entirely, but we just wanted to be on the same page with the three of us until then.”

Edward was rigid, obviously uncomfortable with this. 

“Well,” Jacob said easily. “When she is fully grown, obviously I’m going to… well, talk to her, see what she wants. Take whatever it is she decides slowly. Is that all you wanted to hear, because I assure you if that’s all, then this meeting is unnecessary and I‘ve got other things-”

“I want to be sure you’re not going to hurt my daughter,” Edward said finally. “What’s the deal with Leah?”

Jacob’s brow furrowed, “What?” But his thoughts were loud and clear, and Edward cringed seeing his and Leah’s brief moments of passion in Jacob’s thoughts. “Stay out of my head,” Jacob said through gritted teeth.

“What?” Bella asked softly.

Edward’s gaze left Jacob and he looked down to his wife. “Jacob and Leah are… sleeping together.”

Bella, clearly confused, looked to Jacob. “Is that true?”

Jacob pulled his eyes away from giving Edward a very unpleasant look and looked at Bella. “We were, yeah.”

“Were?”

“Why does this matter?”

“Leah called it off a little while ago,” Edward read Jacob’s thoughts. “But there’s still… passion there.”

“Seriously, give it up.”

“I need to protect Nessie, Jacob. She’s my daughter, you have to understand my concern for her.”

“I do, but I’ll tell you what you want to hear, get out of my head.”

Edward hesitated, but pacified him and tried to ignore his thoughts. 

“Leah and I started sleeping together the night of Sam and Emily’s wedding. Afterwards, we just… didn’t think there would be any harm in continuing our activities for the time-being. Leah called it off a while ago because she had gotten a boyfriend, but they’re broken up now and we’re still not sleeping together.” Despite his palpable desire around her. Surely if given the opportunity again, neither of them would deny one another if earlier was any indication. It felt… well, yeah, maybe kind of supernatural. How hard was it to say no to sex, after all? Around her, he knew without a doubt that he would never ever be able to deny their bodies coming together – especially if she was asking him to do it. No wasn’t a word in his dictionary when it came to Leah – which was weak, but true. At least when it came to sexual favors.

Edward cringed and Jacob assumed he was in his mind, crushing all his dirty thoughts about his Beta immediately. 

“Do you have feelings for her?” Bella asked, clearly not expecting this. Jacob and Leah sleeping together was coming out of left-field. Last she heard, they could barely stand one another, and Jacob almost sent her back to Sam’s pack immediately upon her following him to Forks.

“It was just sex,” Jacob replied awkwardly, though as soon as the words left his lips, they felt wrong.

“That isn’t what she asked,” Edward said, sighing. He wanted to trust Jacob and do him a favor and not intrude on his thoughts, but well, this was Nessie and Jacob was being vague. Nessie had been fated for him, and they had treated it so all along, but if she was going to be blindsided when she was older, Edward wanted her to be prepared. Lucky for him, he got answers as he divulged his energy into sifting through Jacob’s head at that moment. Unfortunately, it only complicated matters further. “You like her,” Edward speculated. “As more than a friend – more than ‘just sex’.”

“You’re wrong,” Jacob said firmly. “I care about Nessie and when she gets old enough, and makes up her mind, I want us to be together, if that’s what she chooses.”

“Stop dodging the question,” Bella groaned. “If you didn’t have feelings for Leah, then why are you evading answering?”

Jacob rested his elbows on his knees and sighed, putting his face in his hands. Why was it so hard to admit to himself what everyone else could already see? Was it the fact that he knew it was insane to feel this way, especially imprinted? He couldn’t make himself say the words though and fell silent. He couldn’t admit aloud what he could barely face himself. What he felt was reckless; stupid, because surely, although she was physically attracted to him, the she-wolf would laugh at any feelings he brought up and they were unimportant in the face of an imprint. 

“Because he does,” Edward answered when Jacob didn’t.

“Okay, fuck off,” Jacob looked up to them both. “I don’t know why you even called me here to talk if you’re just ‘gonna do it for me.”

Bella sighed and gave Edward a warning glance before turning her attention back to her friend. “It’s… it’s okay if you have feelings for her,” she said honestly. “I… I know what it’s like to have feelings for two people.” Well, if this could get anymore awkward. “But you must pick, Jake. You can’t deny your feelings to yourself forever. It will only make things worse. I don’t want Nessie mixed up in that.”

Jacob took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “I’m aware.”

“If you could pick right now, who would it be?” She knew it was an unfair question, but she wanted his honesty. 

“That’s impossible,” Jacob defended. “It’s not like I have a choice with the imprint. When Nessie matures, the imprint will, too, and then whatever this thing is with Leah will be severed.” 

Edward sighed, “Jacob… You always have a choice. Nessie shouldn’t be an option; she should be everything.”

“She’s not even old enough-“ he started to exclaim before Bella cut him off.

“She’s days away, Jake. She’s practically only a couple years younger than you. Not exactly too far-fetched.”

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” Jacob said honestly. “Leah is… an amazing woman, but, well, Nessie is my future, I know that, you know that, Leah knows that, and Renesmee knows that.” 

Edward sighed. “Nessie can make up her own mind, and whatever that is, we will support her, as her parents, but I think she should understand the gravity of the situation before she makes that decision. You must tell her about Leah and let her decide what she wants being aware of your history, and feelings, for Leah.”

“I will, when she’s fully matured. That was always my intention.”

“Fine,” Bella agreed. “But you really need to decide what those feelings are before you tell Ness about them.”

“Got it,” Jacob said, standing up. “Can I go now, or would you like to interrogate me more about my sex life first?” 

He understood their concern for Renesmee, but it was a little uncalled for. He wouldn’t hurt her – she wasn’t even old enough to have this discussion! Jacob wasn’t happy with them putting themselves into his private life. He would deal with this with Nessie, as expected, when she got older. They didn’t reply, so Jacob left. 

Before he got on his motorcycle, though, he hesitated. Maybe he could kill two birds with one stone here and make this trip not a complete waste of time. He went into the main house and found Carlisle in his study and knocked politely on the half-opened door.

”Jacob,” the older vampire looked up from some ancient book. “What a nice surprise, what can I do for you?”

Jacob hesitated before stepping in and shutting the door, “I… need some medical advice, kind of.”

Carlisle shut the book before him and nodded, gesturing for him to take a seat. 

”My blood work, when you ran it, aside from the chromosome abnormality that marked me as a wolf, was there… well, anything else weird that showed up?”

Carlisle hesitated before shaking his head, “Nothing alarming, why?”

Jacob couldn’t believe the words were on his tongue, but he bit back his pride. After all, this conversation would be much less awkward with Carlisle than Billy, right? That was his only other option here. And if Leah needed proof, medical proof was, well, where the answers would be. “What about my testosterone?”

”Elevated, as would be expected for a young male - one who is also the Alpha of a wolf pack. Nothing abnormal.”

Jacob sighed, not knowing what he exactly expected to find here.

”Why are you asking me this, Jacob?”

There was no way Jacob would get Leah to give Carlisle a blood sample, so it looked like he was going to veer in another direction. “Would you assume, considering Leah’s phasing, that she also has elevated testosterone?”

Carlisle wasn’t in the loop on Jacob and Leah’s relationship, but he didn’t pry. “It would make sense, yes. Your people agree with that, right?”

”It’s speculated,” he murmured. “And… well, with my heightened testosterone and Leah’s… could that mean anything?”

Carlisle hesitated, putting the pieces together. “You mean… compatibility wise?” 

That was the nice way of saying it, Jacob thought idly, and he nodded.

Carlisle kept his surprise off his face and shrugged, “It may bring about a higher than average sex drive, but nothing… well, nothing really drastic.”

”Alright,” Jacob went to get up. “Thanks-”

”Wait, sit down. What’s going on Jacob? I’ll help you if I can, but I need more to go on.”

Jacob hesitated, but sat down again and sighed. “Leah thinks that the fact that we are… attracted to each other, considering my imprint means that there is something supernatural forcing us together.”

”What do you think?”

He shrugged, “I have no idea. She’s the only person I’ve been with, so I’m not exactly an expert here. I figure sexual attraction should probably be there if we’re going to be sleeping together. It’s… strong, but it doesn’t necessarily alarm me. She seems pretty caught up on it, though.”

Carlisle nodded, his brow furrowing. “What do you mean strong?”

Jacob shifted uncomfortably and shrugged, “I mean… when I’m in a room with her, she’s all I can focus on…”

Carlisle leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees, hands clasped. “I’m a doctor. There’s nothing you can say that I haven’t heard before.”

”It’s so different from when she first joined my pack,” he sighed. “If I’m away from her or unable to touch her, it’s like there’s this magnet pulling me to her. I get what she’s saying, I do, I just… figured it was because we were sleeping together and the fact that we’ve become so close. No matter how much we’re together, intimately, I crave more of her, but I assume every relationship would be like that.” Though, he hadn’t seen it in the other guys thoughts - not to this extreme, not even for an imprint. Not all the time, anyways. 

Carlisle nodded, taking in his words in a pragmatic, diplomatic way. “Well, Leah’s been through a lot. Sex can be a good way to… mask the things she doesn’t want to deal with. Same for you. Sometimes we mask problems with intimacy because it feels good and it’s easier to cope. Also, the beginning of a relationship can be more… well, sexually charged. It’s new and exciting. Rosalie and Emmett were… very compatible when she found him. Hence their own living arrangements.”

Jacob cringed, wondering if Blondie may be able to shed some light on this, but knowing he would never give her the satisfaction of asking. “So, you don’t think that it’s anything to worry about?”

”Worry? Probably not, no. A high sex drive and sexual compatibility wouldn’t be something I’d necessarily think is cause for concern if you’re both okay with it and it’s not interfering with your daily activities.”

He nodded, but hesitated, and Carlisle saw the confliction in his eyes – as though he may not necessarily be on board with the Heavens pushing them together for sex, but he didn’t not believe it, either, because he clearly felt something intense and strong. Was it normal? Carlisle wasn’t sure, but if Leah was so sure that it wasn’t, maybe that had some merit.  
“Give me some time to research, okay? I’ll see what I can find.”

Jacob nodded before actually getting up this time. “Okay, thanks.”

He left on good faith that if there was anything going on, Carlisle would find something. He got back out onto his bike, not wanting to run into Renesmee considering he still felt sexually frustrated by the she-wolf back on the reservation and drove back to La Push. He wanted to pay a very, very dirty visit to Leah, but he had patrol later and had to try to keep his thoughts in check, so instead, he was intent to jump into the shower when he got home. Thankfully, no one was home when he got there, and instead, he isolated himself into his bedroom, thinking about the fantasy that Leah had mistakenly showed him and took matters into his own hands – just as she had. 

When he came, thinking about her dark eyes looking up at him, hair sprawled over his bed, he sighed. Despite his attempt to relieve his own frustrations, it didn’t work nearly as well as when Leah helped him, and he cursed before getting up and getting a cold shower, wondering if she really was onto something. 

Unfortunately, when Leah phased and joined Embry and Quil later that night, she was faced with a new issue. 

I can’t believe she doesn’t know, Embry thought just as Leah phased. She was good at phasing now – they usually didn’t hear her, and this time was no different.

Emily needs to tell her soon. I don’t want to be there when she finds out, Quil replied.

What is Emily telling and to who? Leah asked, startling the guys to realize she was there.

Hey Leah, oh nothing worth talking about. How are things with you?

Come on, what’s up?

Nothing, seriously, Lee. 

Cut the crap.

I mean… nothing we’re allowed to talk about. Jacob swore us to silence, Alpha-orders. Don’t worry about it, it’s not a big deal.

Alpha-orders. Hm, was that right? Well, why as the Beta, did she not know about whatever this is? She had to pay Jake a visit after patrol. She was able to shrug it off for now and play dumb until her patrol was relieved by Collin, and then she headed right for Jacob’s. Middle of the night or not, this was ridiculous – why was he hiding pack matters from her?  
“What don’t Quil and Embry want me to know?” Leah walked right into Jacob’s bedroom at 2 AM as soon as her patrol ended. They never locked their doors, which was a benefit right now. “Their thoughts are loud and clear – and under Alpha’s orders.”

It took Jacob a second to wake up, though surely, she had woken up the entire house. He groaned and rubbed his eyes before sitting up. What was she talking about? Alpha’s orders? Oh! Shit!

“Leah....” Jacob knew it would fall on him to be the bare of bad news – as much as Emily wanted to be the one to initiate the conversation on this topic, she was stalling too much and right now, looking into Leah’s angry eyes, he knew he wasn’t going to be able to put her off – not a chance. 

“What the fuck is going on Jacob?” She demanded, arms crossed over her chest.

Jacob sat up, pulling the sheets up over his indecent body. “Shut the door, Leah, Jesus.” She obliged, thankfully. “Come here.” 

Leah did as Jacob asked, but wasn’t near complacency until she figured out what the hell was going on. “I’m your second in command,” she said strongly. “I’m supposed to be aware of your decisions.”

“It’s not that,” he argued as she came to sit on the edge of his bed as though there was nothing weird about her being in his room this early when he was, well, naked. Really... considering their frequent activities, it kind of was normal. Just not when Billy, Rachel, and Paul were also home. “This isn’t my news to tell, but since you’re here, I’ll explain.” How did he even start? He had to move over to make room for her in his single bed – the bed in which they admittedly made use of the lack of space many times thus far. The single bed was way better than her double, it made it even hotter. But he had to admit, against the tree had been his favorite spot thus far – or maybe the shower. Focus, Jake! “Did you talk to Emily today?” 

She looked really confused, and Jacob knew Emily’s plan had been derailed. “No, I think I’d remember if I had. I haven’t spoke to her since this morning when we left her place.”

Jacob took his head out of the gutter and took a deep breath before telling her exactly what he hoped wouldn’t be his responsibility to proctor; something he knew, despite her tough demeanor, would affect the she wolf in an uncanny way. “Leah, Emily and Sam asked me to let them be the ones to tell you, which is why-“

“Tell me what?” She really didn’t have the patience to have him beating around the bush and she hated that Jacob knew something and had kept it from her. Despite their activities, she knew he had no obligation to tell her everything, but it still felt weird that he would hide something from her considering how close they had gotten. “Jacob, seriously, I’m a big girl-”

Jacob felt the weight of his impending words weighing on his shoulders. As far as she had come since the broken woman that he saw in Sam’s arms the night of their wedding, he knew this would be a hard pill for her to swallow. 

“Emily is pregnant.” There. He said it – she knew. Done.

But he still wasn’t prepared for the look on her face. Although she tried to be strong, he could visibly see the disappointment in her eyes – maybe it was because he had grown so in tune with her since Sam and Emily’s wedding. Maybe she could play it off to someone else; maybe even Sam and Emily, but not him. He felt like she was an open book to him, and he was her own, easy to read novel. The thought didn’t sit easily in the pit of his stomach, especially after the events earlier that day - or well, yesterday if you wanted to be specific. He quickly looked at the clock and internally groaned at the ungodly hour. He was also vaguely aware, despite the less than ideal situation, of Leah’s phasing dress being hiked up mid-thigh as she sat by him, and how it hung loosely around her chest, exposing more skin than normal. What was wrong with him?

Leah felt like she had been punched in the stomach. A lump immediately rose in her throat and she tried to gulp it back, forcing herself to stay composed right now, but she felt like curling up in a ball and allowing the burning sensation that immediately sprung to her eyes take over. She needed to get out of here – be alone, and deal with this her own way before she starting sobbing on Jacob’s bed.

“Leah...”

She got up, “Thanks for telling me.”

She went toward the door and Jacob sighed. “Wait.” He used his alpha voice – something he hated himself for enforcing on her of all people.

When she turned back to him, her eyes were clouded with tears, jaw clenched. He knew some of her hostility was because of his enforced law, but the sadness was also his fault for being the one to have dropped the bomb on her. “What?” She tried to make her voice curt, but it wavered, and she cursed herself internally for not being stronger.

Jacob reached down to grab his khaki shorts and a t-shirt and threw it on quickly. “Let’s go for a walk.” The only place he wanted to be right now was in his bed, but he felt responsible for her reaction. Maybe he could have put it more nicely or prepared her, but she had been adamant. On second thought, she would have never respected him beating around the bush and trying to approach it emotionally. The house was too full for this conversation, even if everyone was (hopefully) sound asleep. She hardly needed a keeper, but his heart wouldn’t let her storm off upset without making sure she was okay – not after everything they had been through together. God, he wished Emily had of had this conversation earlier as planned. 

She didn’t resist him, though, and he led her back through the house, then into the woods. They were silent the entire walk and Leah tried to keep her emotions trapped inside as they walked through the trees, through the familiar path to their small clearing behind Jacob’s house.

It was still dark considering the early hour but they got through the tangles of the brush and made it to their spot. Jacob took her into his arms as soon as they got there, seeing the broken look in her eyes and her holding back tears, and she started to cry for reasons unbeknownst to even her. She had grown so far away from the girl who was always broken. She even felt better the last couple months, so why did this have to happen now? Just as she felt as though she could make it through the day seeing Sam and Emily and maybe even (actually) be happy for them.

“I’m sorry,” Jacob said honestly, soothed by the familiar presence of Leah in his arms. The scent of her shampoo was ingrained on his brain and the way she tried so hard to be impenetrable through every minute of every day was one reason he thought she could possibly be the strongest woman he knew – even if sometimes her strength translated to the bitchy-misery they all knew so well. He moved his hands gently up and down her back, trying to let her know he was there – she didn’t have to do this alone, but his wolf resented him for giving his man a false hope of a reconciliation between them. Especially when his body was still so unsatisfied without her.

“It’s fine,” she said, her words muffled by his chest as she buried her face. Jacob was always there, she realized. In that moment, he felt like her safe-haven and the feelings she wished she could bury deeply resurfaced. 

“You knew it would happen sooner or later,” he said gently as she pulled back from him to wipe her cheeks dry. 

“I know... I just wasn’t expecting you to say well, that. I can’t believe I didn’t notice…” She had been preoccupied, however, with the pack and Jacob and Jeremy. That and she didn’t patrol with Sam, so maybe it wasn’t so crazy that she didn’t know. She hadn’t seen Emily drink since they returned to La Push, but she also hadn’t really been fixated on Emily’s alcohol consumption – she had her own problems. “How far along is she?”

“Eighteen weeks.”

Leah took in the information and nodded, “When were they going to tell me?”

“Emily was struggling with finding the right time; she told me earlier that she was going to today – I don’t know why she didn’t.”

“No time would have been right,” she muttered. “But she must not be feeling well; Sam called and asked me to take his patrol tonight because she was sick. I just figured she caught a bug - not a baby.”

Jacob nodded as she stepped away from him, pacing. “Can I ask you something?”

“You just did,” she said, trying to ease the mood. It spoke to her comfortable demeanor around Jacob that she didn’t mind him seeing her less than composed anymore. She still hated being weak but taking comfort in his arms wasn’t as repulsive as it once was to her.

Jacob didn’t bite to her sarcasm and continued his thought aloud, “What really bothers you about it? Is it still because it’s Sam and Emily…?”

“Or me being a genetic dead-end?” She finished his sentence and for once, he was nice enough not to say the words she knew he was thinking. “Honestly? I don’t think about them as much anymore -- at least what used to be.” And she knew why. “But I think it’s just another memory lost to me. I always dreamed of having kids – his kids, and it’s like my life is playing out before me in some sick joke, with someone I once thought of as a sister. That, and I know that it may never be me, even if I find someone crazy enough to have a kid with me; my wolf may have other plans. It was supposed to be me and Sam. Me pregnant. Us married. Not her. It just sucks.” 

“Well,” Jacob said, trying to lighten her dismal mood. “If it was you, that would mean you’d have never experienced what it was like to be with a true Alpha,” he teased. Admittedly, she had taken the baby news well despite her tears. Much better than he imagined.

Leah caught Jacob’s gaze after a moment, and grinned, trying to push away the dark, swirling feelings in her belly of her ex-boyfriend’s pregnant wife and focus on the doomed feelings that Jacob made her feel instead. He was watching her intently and she stepped toward him until their bodies were almost touching and then reached up to place her hands on his chest, sliding them up to wrap them around his neck. His hands instinctively went down to rest on her hips before he roughly pulled her against him, closing the space between their bodies.

Immediately, they started kissing. It was slow and careful and sweet, yet fueled by a familiar aching desire that was begging to be satisfied. It reminded her of her bedroom after the shower; the intimacy, and both were drunk on the feeling. He remembered to tell her about his conversation with Carlisle, but right now, that could wait. It wasn’t like he had gotten much from the vampire, anyways - and his body wanted to do so much more than talk. 

He sat down on the grass, pulling her onto his lap. She straddled his hips, their torsos pressed tightly together, and they stayed like that, kissing and exploring each other’s bodies with their hands, until he picked her up off his hips easily and gently rolled her to lie on her back against the grass. 

Jacob hovered over her, his arms holding him up so that he was just barely chest to chest with her. Despite the passion that their kissing had stirred between them, their lips stayed gentle and soft on each other’s and she felt lost in the moment – trying to forget that there was a world outside of their little field, forget that Jacob was fated for another woman, forget that the man who used to be love of her life was forever indebted to her cousin who was now pregnant with his child, and forget that she would probably be forever alone and childless. 

Her fingers went to his t-shirt and pulled it off, over his head, throwing it to the side. She wanted to feel all of him against her, and he quickly reached down, pulling her dress up to gather at her hips as her fingers made quick work of his shorts and he kicked them off. He managed to get her dress entirely up and off with her help, and he brought his lips back to hers, more fiercely than before.

“Touch yourself,” Jacob said suddenly, causing her brow to quirk. 

“That’s your job, isn’t it?”

He smirked as his fingers slipped down and inside of her, teasing her and making sure she was ready before his hips pushed forward into her. She cried out at the contact, her body overjoyed at the exercise, and he reached up, taking her hand and bringing it down so that her fingers touched her most sensitive nerve endings. “Like your fantasy,” he whispered in her ear, kissing her earlobe and down her neck. She obliged, and he moved slowly inside of her.

“Faster,” she groaned, feeling him holding back. Their slow, careful movements from earlier had long been forgotten as he crashed his lips back against hers, their tongue’s fighting together. He didn’t listen, though, and kept moving slowly inside of her and she pulled her face back from his. “Jake, please,” she felt her entire body ache for release, not having had done this with him for so long. 

Her words made him lose all resolve of prolonging this, and he listened, his hips hitting against her hard and accurately as she cried out with each thrust. Suddenly, her soft cries grew louder, and her body wracked against his, her fingernails digging into his biceps. He buried his face into the crook of her neck and continued moving, waiting for his own release, which came only moments later. He groaned, loudly, as his own orgasm hit him hard – much better than by himself in his room, and he waited until it was over before withdrawing from her.

He rolled off her and she shifted so that her body was pressed against his, her head on his chest, a comfortable silence falling between them as they both caught their breaths. She felt the emotions that she had been trying to push away for so long hit her hard and her chest filled with a warmth that had nothing to do with their heightened body temperatures or related to sex. She gulped, willing herself to push the adoration for her Alpha away, but as he looked down at her, she knew that he saw the confliction in her face. 

“What’s wrong?”

Withdraw. Retreat. “Nothing, it’s stupid, I should get going anyways, it’s late.”

“It wouldn’t be our first time staying out here all night,” he pointed out. 

Leah tried to give him a carefree smile, but her eyes betrayed her as she tried to avoid his chocolate brown gaze. 

“I know you probably better than anyone,” Jacob reminded her. “And I know when Leah Clearwater says it’s nothing, that it’s always something, and when you don’t want to talk about it and keep it bottled up, it’s probably a lot more than nothing and only going to end up making things worse - like when you exploded on poor Quil and told him you were going to push him over the cliffs and assaulted him.”

“They ratted me out to you?” Leah said, clearly amused before growing serious again. 

“I know everything,” Jacob smirked. 

“Well… can my second inarguable decision be that I can’t get in trouble for that?”

Jacob laughed, “Does it look like you’re in trouble?”

”No, but-”

”But nothing, your second decision is off the table now, whether you needed to use it or not. One left, Clearwater. Use it wisely.”

”It was a joke!”

”I’m not in a joking mood,” Jacob said. “Two gone - one left.”

”You still didn’t bring me cake,” she groaned. “Or McDonalds.”

”Are you really going to use that as your last one?”

”No, of course not! One left, fine. I’ll think of something really good, I promise.” 

He chuckled, shaking his head. “You always surprise me.” 

It occurred to Leah that being naked, pressed up against Jacob post-sex was so unflinchingly comfortable. With Sam, it had been comfortable too, but she had always been so self-conscious despite his attempts to assure her of her beauty. With Jacob, she knew he wouldn’t whisper sweet nothings in her ear to reassure her like Sam had, but he didn’t need to. She told him that Jeremy made her feel like a woman, but she had been wrong. Jacob made her feel like a woman – desirable, appreciated, and comfortable with herself. She was also much older and had a different outlook on life than when she was with Sam, but that was a thought for another time. She had thrown her heart into the deep end of the pool with Jacob without meaning to, and now she wasn’t sure where to go from here.

When she didn’t reply, he sighed. “You can talk to me, you know.” He had a feeling she was holding something back from him, and it wasn’t the first time he had felt it with her - a sense that she wasn’t telling him the whole truth. Was the baby on her mind more than she let on?

Leah hesitated, but finally, against her better judgement, met Jacob’s gaze. She felt weak. Instead of trying to convey what she felt in words, she moved so that she straddled his hips again, leaning against him. He had to know - she couldn’t keep denying her feelings. She wanted him to know, regardless of his reaction. It was eating her up – like the pressure in a can of coke before you popped the top and released it. She didn’t want to carry these feelings around by herself anymore – or deny them. They were too good; too pure; too powerful. Maybe they were unwarranted, unrequited, and damn well stupid, but her heart didn’t get her head’s memo – or her mom’s or Rachel’s, apparently. Even Sam’s cautionary words slipped through her neural pathways, malfunctioning before her head had sent the message to her heart to shut the hell up and surround itself in barbed wire. Oh, well, what’s done was done, right?

In the words of Shania Twain, there’s no way but up from here. 

She brought her lips back to his gently, one hand resting on his shoulder, the other against his cheek. Although their lips frequently found each other’s, Jacob felt so much more in that moment and his instinctively put a hand on her hip, steadying her, the other tangled in her hair. The hand that had priorly been resting on his shoulder moved down his arm, feeling all the muscles, and then back to his chest. There was no haste in her movements, and his body felt on fire where her fingertips grazed, as though they were leaving marks on his skin. Their kisses didn’t heat up quickly, though; they were so painfully slow and full of emotion that it almost hit Jacob like a truck when he realized that he wasn’t the only one fighting with himself over what could be.

He broke their kisses, closing his eyes and catching his breath as their forehead’s rested together. He could sense the nervousness radiating off her. Her breathing didn’t even out, and her body grew tense against his and he knew she wasn’t just trying to go for round two just now – not that he would object. She was letting him in; being completely vulnerable and showing him something he shouldn’t have been oblivious to this entire time – at least the magnitude of it. Could he admit his feelings to himself and her after silencing and denying the rouge thoughts for months? Did she feel the same way? Was it fair to any of them, including Renesmee? 

“Leah…” his voice was thick with emotion, and Leah took a deep breath before opening her eyes to meet his gaze. 

“I know,” she said easily. “This wasn’t supposed to happen.”

Jacob was speechless, truly, and he knew that she was waiting for him to respond, but he couldn’t find any words. This was why she hadn’t completely freaked out over the baby. She had been upset, sure, but nothing compared to what she would have been months ago.

What was he supposed to say? Clearly, he had to be in weird dream, and this wasn’t real – Leah Clearwater couldn’t possibly… what, like him? How long had she, too, been fighting against it? He knew there was something there – but he wouldn’t admit it to himself, and now, he felt the overwhelming clarity of his feelings sucker punch him in the gut. Likewise, he had been, admittedly, jealous of Jeremy for weeks now although he had suspected his connection with the she-wolf was stronger for Leah – and had openly told her, he thought it was just their insane sexual chemistry that was paling in comparison to her and Jeremy. There were so many questions running through his head, leaving him lost for words, not knowing which one to bring to the forefront first, until Leah spoke.

“I should go,” she said finally as the silence hung around them. 

“No,” Jacob pulled her back against him as she tried to get up, his hands resting on her bare hips. “You can’t drop a bomb like that on me and just leave. That’s why you told me it wasn’t just about sex… the other day when you told me to phase. But you filtered your thoughts… This is why you were going to break up with Jeremy; the real reason.” He hated to bring him up, but he had to ask. 

“It doesn’t matter. It’s not like it changes anything,” Leah said matter-of-factually. “You’re forever indebted to that half-breed. It’s stupid.” The air felt thick between them and she took a deep breath in. Her avoidance of the question confirmed it. 

Jacob clenched his jaw, fighting the urge to say her name. “Talk to me. Please.”

She wouldn’t meet his eyes, and she felt a lump rise in her throat. What was she doing? Was she right in showing him her true feelings? She felt so vulnerable, but also safe with him. Like despite the challenges, he would protect her heart; or at least make every effort to. “I just don’t want to lose you, Jake.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” he reminded her. He wanted to tell her that he cared about her, too - his inner man was screaming at him to express how much he cared, but his inner wolf was holding him back – forcing him to acknowledge his imprint and how unfair it would be of him to promise her some type of future when he didn’t know what his looked like, but his wolf also felt intrigue at Leah’s words. The confliction forced him to keep his mouth shut.

“When she’s old enough, you’ll be gone.”

“I’ll still be here.”

“We won’t be us anymore.”

He wanted her to be comfortable with him, but she wouldn’t look at him. He put a finger under her chin to lift her gaze to his. Despite his wolf acknowledging his imprint, it felt like it was aching to hear something more from the she-wolf’s lips. “We’re always going to be us; you’re my Beta.”

“But not your imprint,” Leah whispered. “Always second-best.”

Jacob took a steadying breath in, hearing the sadness in her words. His own chest ached. He promised Sam that he wouldn’t hurt Leah, but he was potentially doing the exact same thing that he had done to her, and it didn’t sit well with him. Maybe he hadn’t tried to, but that didn’t matter now. “You’re my Beta,” Jacob said strongly. “But that doesn’t mean second-best. It means… well, you’re the one I trust to lead when I’m not around. I trust your decisions and your willingness to put the pack first. It’s about being my equal to guide the pack and step up when I can’t. We’re a team.”

Leah felt her heart swell a little as he voiced his faith in her, but it was short-lived. “I’m not stupid. Hell, maybe I am - maybe I continually get myself into the worst situations possible, but I’m aware how this plays out. I know you’re going to be with her,” Leah sighed. “I don’t know why I even told you, I just thought that you should know.”

“I’m glad you told me,” he said softly. The way she kissed him and moved on him had confirmed her feelings inasmuch as his inner man needed, without her saying the exact words, but his wolf wanted to howl out in objection – to force him to evoke more from her. Maybe this wasn’t reality. Maybe he was dreaming, and that’s why the words he felt like he needed to hear from her lips weren’t coming out; his dreams always tried to screw him. Much like at the cabin, when he voiced his concerns about Jeremy (unfairly so), it felt as though his next words came out without thinking – powered by something other than reason and practicality. His Alpha pride rearing its ugly head. “Even though you never actually said anything.” 

She hesitated, studying him before speaking. Her next words were rushed – as though if she stopped midway through, she would lose all resolve. “The way I feel about you terrifies me, and I tried to ignore it, but I can’t,” she paused, and Jacob studied her face intently, trying to find a way to comfort her without being deceitful to his imprint and giving her false hope when he was so unsure about what his imprint held, but as soon as the next words left her mouth, he felt something inside of his chest buckle. “I wasn’t supposed to fall in love with you.” Her words were only a whisper, but they were exactly what he needed to hear; however, the intensity of them hit him hard.  
Love? Were her feelings that strong? Was she even ready for that? He thought back to only months ago, at the wedding when she was in Sam’s arms. Could she really say she was over Sam… because of him? Had he replaced Sam in her heart? He assumed she liked him, but love? It was big considering he knew just how much Leah had struggled with her feelings for the older wolf for so long. He knew, in that moment, though, as the words rung in his head over and over, that he felt complete – more so than ever before. His inner man and wolf both shut up, and Jacob felt strangely alone not being pulled in two different directions. 

The words he desperately wanted to hear from her were there; she was in love with him. And he knew a part of him was in love with her, too, despite having trouble admitting that to himself before now. The feelings had been there a while, stirring and accumulating, without his permission, and now that he acknowledged them, the true depth of his feelings for her was staggering. It just made sense; his desire to comfort her and be her rock, their amazing chemistry, and well, their compatibility. They had both been through a lot of heartbreak and they both understood it; each other. He forced the feelings away before now because of his imprint and because despite him believing that she felt more than just ‘friends with benefits’ for him, he didn’t allow himself to believe there were any deeply rooted feelings from her side – maybe just a crush; certainly not love, until she just uttered the words. Hell, he barely could admit he had feelings to her before today, and now, he felt himself holding back the urge to return her admission. 

He so desperately wanted to tell her how he felt, too, and make her happy, but the other part feared the imprint’s change too much to dishonor the words. He knew that he needed the entire picture before dealing with, and admitting, his feelings for her – to know how the imprint would change when Nessie was fully grown. He couldn’t make a rash decision on the information that he had now for Leah’s sake, even if his wolf had finally shut up. 

He had been quiet for a long moment, as the internal war raged in his head, and she watched him expectantly as he processed her words. She was still nervous, but more relaxed than earlier. Making empty promises to her wasn’t fair to her, but he didn’t want her to think that he didn’t care about her. His next words weren’t a fair ask, but he selfishly asked anyway. “Can you give me some time?” He asked softly, looking into her eyes. “I need to figure out things with Nessie, first. I have to see what changes there before I’m any good to you here.” His hand that had been previously resting on her hip slid up the length of her body until he rested it against her cheek. “I won’t string you along, but I can’t promise you anything until I feel the full force of the imprint. If someone comes along for you in the meantime, I understand. You’re not obligated to wait for me, that would be unfair for me to ask, but… I care about you and you’re far from second best. I promise to never treat you like that, but I need to know what I’m up against before I can even try to start anything with us.”

Leah appreciated his honesty, and she nodded, feeling her chest swell. He wanted to fight for her; for them. It was honorable, and showed her his feelings very plainly, without words, but she appreciated him not exerting them on her until he was sure. It was a brave ask; something they both knew was probably futile in the face of an imprint, but it made her feel important and loved. Maybe she was pathetic – determined to stay by the sidelines and wait to see what happened with him and another woman. He hadn’t asked her to do that necessarily; he had given her permission to explore her options, but realistically, she knew he was the only option for her right now – until that option was formally exhausted. It would have been better if he had told her that he didn’t feel that way for her instead of giving them both a false sense of security together, but after hearing about the baby, she needed it. 

She knew how this ended and that it probably wouldn’t be them at the finish line, but a part of her held onto the hope that maybe his imprint was different. Maybe he wasn’t Sam – maybe he could still choose her. Maybe she had been watching too many romantic comedies with Rachel and had fallen victim to something she had long since pushed away: Hope. It was a dangerous thing, really. She was playing Russian Roulette with the Devil, but this wasn’t all for nothing, right? She thought back to their insane, magnetic chemistry, and his questioning of his imprint all along, and felt validated in her feelings despite the gamble. Maybe she would end up hurt, and if she did, she had no one to blame but herself, but for now? Hope made her feel comfort. And all she could do was live for the moment.

She rested her forehead against his, letting the silence come between them once more. No more words needed to be said; they had said it all and it still got them nowhere long-term. But they were still here now. “Can my third inarguable decision be that you cut your imprint loose?”

Jacob laughed, the heaviness of their words dissipating. “If it were that easy, I’d Alpha-order you to use that as your last decision, but unfortunately, your definition of inarguable means with me, and not the universe.” His words weren’t fair to Renesmee. He loved her, but well, that love was only brotherly love right now. Romance was kindling with the woman in his arms, and he wished he could have more power over his life.

“Can I have my second decision back then?” She asked, a smile creeping into her face.

“Nope, it’s null and void, but good try.”

She laughed and fell back against him comfortably. “The universe kind of sucks sometimes. And you do, too,” she teased, evoking a grin. “Well… until your world gets thrown upside down, we still have right now, right?”

Jacob nodded, kissing her hair. “We absolutely do.”

They were silent for a long moment, looking up at the star-speckled sky and enjoying being in each other’s arms, before Jacob broke it.

“Leah?”

“Yeah?”

“I think you do have a thing for Alpha’s,” he teased, remembering Paul’s words, which got him a smack on the chest as he chuckled. 

“Maybe Alpha’s have a thing for me,” she mocked. “You wouldn’t be here if you didn’t.”

“Maybe I’m just being nice.”

“You’re not nice. Remember, I don’t do nice.”

Jacob chuckled and rolled his eyes before she said goodnight, resting her head on his chest.

“Not so fast, Clearwater.” He leaned in, kissing her more passionately. She loved him. The thought was so… strange, yet so familiar and he hated not returning them. Someone was going to get hurt here, and he had a feeling it wouldn’t just be one person, but for tonight, they were just them and he didn’t see the problem in continuing that until something changed – they were both already in way too deep for another few days or weeks to make a difference, right? Imprint or not, the damage was, or would be, already done.

Leah rolled so her body was atop of his as their kissing grew in intensity, the moonlight on their skin. Luckily, they had satisfied their pent-up, animalistic lust from the last month of celibacy already that evening because now, their movements were painfully gentle and slow – savoring the moment, and when they were done, they fell asleep together, satisfied. It was the first time that they had done more than sex – consciously, at least. Tonight, they had made love and the full weight of realizing the difference between sex and love hit him – the sex was still amazing, definitely, but admitting to himself that he did love her brought a tenderness and depth to their bodies coming together – it was the cherry on top. His heart felt a connection with her that he couldn’t deny. He wasn’t sure what would happen in the morning, but as sleep overcame him, he realized whatever happened, they would figure it out. Together. 

Leah felt the sun piercing through the trees above them, warming her skin, and the feeling woke her. Usually it was the rain that stirred her out of her slumber, not the warmth of the sun. Her eyes fluttered open and saw that Jacob was still asleep – jaw open and snoring quietly. 

She smiled, taking in his chiseled jaw and the peaceful look on his face before rolling over to grab her dress and throw it over her. It was mid-March and it had to only be about 40 degrees, but their heightened temperatures kept them toasty warm through-out their winter activities. It was nice to think about waking up to him mid-way through summer, in their clearing, naked, and coated with the sun’s warmth - or even next to her in her bed again, but she knew that was unrealistic. Nessie would be full-grown way before then if her prior growth status held true. And despite their words from the night prior, their romance was still a hefty gamble.

Jacob stirred as she moved and he reached up, rubbing his eyes. “Morning,” he said, looking over at her, shielding his eyes from the sun’s rays with his hands. “Oh look, the sun finally decided to come back.” As he looked down to her, he felt his wolf and man surprisingly quiet. Usually, his wolf liked to make him feel bad waking up with Leah – as a betrayal to the imprint, but he felt nothing but pure satisfaction. It felt nice.

Leah smiled, “Maybe it means today will be a good day.”

“Ms. Optimistic this morning,” he smirked, shifting his body up as he leaned back on his elbows. “Hey, I talked to Carlisle about what you told me yesterday.”

“Carlisle?” Leah asked, brow furrowed. 

“Well, it’s not like I have many options here. Plus, it was less awkward with the vamp then asking my own dad.” Leah sighed, hating to have her sex life brought up to the vampires, but nodded, signifying him to continue. “He said it doesn’t seem too far-fetched but would look into it.”

“Helpful,” Leah grumbled.

“It’s all we got for now,” he paused. “Though, now that I think about it, maybe it has something to do with what you told me last night?”

She blushed, and he took satisfaction in her embarrassment – it was cute. Big, tough, and impenetrable Leah Clearwater reduced to a real person. With him, anyways. “My feelings aside, I still think there’s something… odd here.” However, as she looked at him now, so close to her, she felt the pull she kept describing diminished significantly from the night before. She still wanted to mess up his hair and roll around the clearing with him all day, but the urgency of it had disappeared – the insatiability she had felt before. It felt more normal. Hm. Some theories ran through her head, but she decided not to bring this up to Jacob and see what happened in the coming days – and what Carlisle found out, if anything. 

“Can I ask you something?” She said, wanting to change the topic.

“Anything.”

“You know I’m accepted to the community college in September – I wanted to see, with the threat of the vampires diminished, if it would be possible that I could start phasing out of the pack?”

Jacob wasn’t surprised and he hated losing her, but he knew she wasn’t happy, and that thought alone allowed him to answer quickly. “Of course. We will figure out patrol later today, okay?”

“I’ll cover my patrol shifts – don’t worry about it. I’m still around if you need me, but I think it’s for the best.”

“Does this have anything to do with the baby… or, well, us?” Jacob asked before grabbing his shorts and slipping into them, following with his shirt.

Leah shrugged, “I’m just tired of living like this. I want to go back to normal life, especially if I’m going back to school. It just feels like it’s time – like I may finally be in the right head space.”

“Well, I’m happy for you.” 

“Thanks, Jake.”

“I get it now,” he observed. She quirked a brow in confusion before he continued. “The difference between sex without love and with.”

He hadn’t told he loved her, too, but she didn’t need him to. He said it with his entire body – and with his comments the night before, and now. She smiled, remembering his question to her when he asked her about it the first time, after Paul’s accident. “Which is better?” 

Jacob laughed, rolling his eyes. “I don’t think you really need me to answer that – though, I do miss that tree.”

“Leah, Jacob, and the tree, a memoir.”


	13. Renesmee

Jacob felt torn the week after parting with Leah in their clearing. He focused on patrol so that he didn’t have to deal with his own thoughts and pointedly stayed away from the Cullen’s to try to rationalize everything. He needed a clear head, but not seeing Leah and Renesmee hadn’t given him much clarity on how to navigate this.

Unfortunately, when he got home from patrol, he was faced with the she-wolf herself, with Rachel, in their living room. 

“Hey,” he said easily, going in and sitting back in the armchair, looking at the TV where the girl’s attention was fixed.

“Hey Jake,” Rachel greeted happily as Paul followed Jacob in. They had both just finished patrol and Paul curled up on the love seat with Rachel, wrapping an arm around her. Jacob watched his sister lean into him happily, kissing his cheek and then looked toward Leah – who had her gaze fixed on him, too.

She was on the couch, alone, and Jacob felt torn. He wanted to go to her side more than anything but risked more questions from Paul if he saw them cuddled up together. They both agreed to keep whatever this was between them quiet for now, to avoid any more pack drama and questions until they had an answer for what they were, exactly, but he wasn’t sure when he would get that – when Renesmee would fully mature. 

He had been sure, back in their clearing, that continuing things until then wasn’t harmful, but afterwards, when he had some time alone to think and compare himself to Sam, he hated himself for being so selfish knowing the hurt he could cause her if the imprint didn’t follow the unromantic course upon maturing. It was why aside from a few text messages and phone calls; he hadn’t visited her – to try and protect her. She had been busy trying to phase out of the pack, too, so the lack of time they spent together wasn’t completely unfounded. She hadn’t phased since, either, so he was able to avoid her in wolf-form. 

Leah, on the other hand, just felt like she wanted to be near him even more since the clearing. Maybe things were messy, but well, it was their mess and being close to him made her feel happy and right now, she wanted to hold onto that feeling for as long as she could. She felt the awkwardness, though, watching Paul curl up to Rachel and when her eyes met Jacob’s, she held his gaze for a moment before averting her eyes, not wanting him to feel obligated to play a boyfriend-role when he asked her for some time to figure things out. 

Jacob felt the need to go to her side, though – and to let her protect herself, as he knew she could. It wasn’t fair of him to make decisions for her. If she was okay with this, knowing the risk, then he should step up. Leah looked back to the TV, and suddenly, Jacob surprised himself as he got up, and went over to the she-wolf, Rachel and Paul’s eyes on him. He sat by Leah, following suit with Paul, and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her close. Leah looked a little confused, but snuggled into him, her head resting against his chest and thankfully, Paul kept his remarks to himself, and turned back to the TV, just as Rachel gave Leah a knowing smile before diverting her gaze, too.

They were watching Dirty Dancing and although it wouldn’t be Jacob’s first choice, he had trouble focusing on the TV with Leah in his arms, anyways. He let his fingers stroke her arm idly, and she moved closer to him, stifling a yawn. She was exhausted and Jacob was so warm and comfortable that her eyes almost fluttered closed.

“You’re obsessed with these dancing movies now,” Leah casually mentioned to Rachel, trying to stay awake.

She shrugged, “Have you thought about coming back to dance class?”

Jacob figured she hadn’t been going considering her blow up with Jeremy, but never got a chance to actually ask. Leah sighed, “I think I’ll peacefully withdraw myself.”

“Jeremy’s asked about you.”

“Oh yeah?”

“He’s really sorry for… well, how everything happened. He wanted me to tell you that you should come back to class at least.”

“Maybe he should tell me that himself,” Leah muttered. 

“Should I tell him you have a new boyfriend?” Rachel grinned, gesturing to Jacob.

Leah hesitated, and Jacob answered. “We’re just… trying things out.”

“Well, I’m happy for you guys,” Rachel said softly as the movie continued in the background. “I mean, I still think it’s stupid, but if you’re both happy then…”

Leah laughed, and then looked up to Jacob, who grinned. “I am happy.”

“Me, too.” He leaned down to kiss her, evoking a gagging noise from Paul – and a slapping noise from Rachel as she hit his arm. 

They all returned their attention to the movie, and Leah yawned. Jacob shifted so that she could lie out on the couch, and he grabbed the blanket behind him. She laid down on the outside of the couch and he struggled to fit on the inside, wrapping an arm around her so that he was spooning her and he draped the blanket over them – not lost on the fact that her ass was against his crotch. Romantic gesture or pragmatic positioning? Hard to say, but he clearly won both because Leah seemed pleased and idly wiggled her lower half against his to ‘get comfortable.’ 

“Careful, Clearwater,” he whispered tauntingly, his lips at her earlobe.

Leah grinned and was on good behavior until Jacob’s hand, under the blanket, moved to play with the waistband of her pants. It was dangerous – Paul and Rachel were only a few feet away, but well, they were lip locked and not paying any attention to them. Although she still hadn’t felt the insatiable desire to be with him since after the clearing, she still wanted to be naked with him as much as possible - a much more normal, manageable desire. Leah bit her lower lip, trying to pay attention to the movie, but every move Jacob made distracted her – even his cologne mixed with sweat. His hand quickly slipped under the band of her pants and down lower until he heard the front door shut and Billy’s voice in the entry way of the living room.

“Hey kids,” he said, shrugging off his coat.

Allison was with him and gave them a warm smile. Rachel and Paul stopped kissing immediately and almost sprang apart – engaged or not, Billy was daunting, and Jacob instantly removed his hand from where it shouldn’t be, draping his arm once more over the blanket.

“Hey dad,” Jacob said easily, getting a curious look from his father at his rather intimate position with Leah, but Billy brushed it off. 

“I see that my living room is taken up,” he mused.

The movie credits were rolling, now, though, and Rachel smiled. “We can leave the room to you guys,” she said, getting up and taking Paul’s hand – into her room.

“Door open,” Billy called as they went down the hall.

Jacob pulled the blanket off him and Leah and they both got up, too. His dad, thankfully, didn’t ask any questions, and they slipped down the hall into his room as Billy call the same warning to them.

Leah blushed as Jacob waited to hear Billy wheel into the living room, and then he shut the door quietly. He turned to Leah, and chuckled, his hand nervously rubbing his neck. “Too much?”

“It was just enough,” Leah said, stepping forward to wrap her arms around his neck. “I mean… except for the part where your hand stopped.”

Oh, he was in for it with her. If he hadn’t realized just how dangerous dating Leah would be before, he did now because with exclusivity between them – for now, at least, and the feelings they both had, accompanied with the sexual tension, they were going to need to follow Rosalie and Emmett’s suit and get their own place to break their newfound ‘dating’ status in the right way. Having her as his, somewhat officially – for now anyways, made him want her even more, if that was possible. “God, Leah, everyone’s home…”

“You think Rachel and Paul don’t…”

“I don’t even want to think of that,” he groaned. “And you’re not very good at being quiet, if I do remember correctly?”

“And you’re not good at keeping your hands to yourself, if I remember correctly,” she taunted.

“You’re going to be the end of me, woman,” he smirked, leaning down to kiss her feverishly – before he led her to the bed. 

The next morning, Jacob awoke to Leah practically on top of him thanks to his single bed, but fully clothed and sound asleep. He smirked at how innocent she looked because he knew their activities the night before were anything but. Luckily, his dad had been with Allison and appreciated Jacob’s privacy because his door didn’t have a lock, but they weren’t interrupted. If they had of been, Leah on her knees would have definitely gotten him a fierce talking to. Of course, he had been a gentleman and returned her kindness, but that was yet another thing he preferred his dad was ignorant to. 

Unfortunately, his happiness this morning was short-lived. Emily and Sam were telling everyone about the baby today – finally. He promised he would be there, but he was regretting his promise more as the clock ticked closer to him having to get out of bed and away from Leah. Paul and Rachel may know about their new dating status – if you could call it that, but no one else did and he wasn’t looking forward to Sam’s opinion on it. 

He had told Sam and Emily the day after they had woken up in the clearing that Leah knew about the pregnancy and she had asked him to please tell them that she was happy for them but needed some space. He had seen the hurt in Emily’s eyes when he told her, but he assured her that Leah was, in fact, fine, and would reconcile when she felt the time was right. Unfortunately, he couldn’t justify when that would be for Emily – but he promised she was trying. They had obliged her ask for space thus far, but today would be the first day she really had to see them since finding out. Despite her strong demeanor, and their new relationship, he could assume today was still going to be awkward for her.

He let Leah sleep, not waking her as he jumped in the shower and got dressed. He ran into his dad and Paul in the kitchen. “Morning, Jake.”

“Morning,” he said, grabbing some toast.

“So… would you like to explain why Leah’s asleep in your bed?” Billy asked.

“Dad, not right now-“

“I’m just asking,” he said firmly. 

“Just asking so you can tell me what a stupid idea it is because of the imprint?” He asked, busying himself with making toast to avoid his dad’s gaze.

“No, just ‘wanna be kept in the loop, is all,” Billy said, causing Jacob to turn to face him after he pushed the toast down in the toaster. “It is my house.”

“We’re… together, for now.”

Billy nodded, knowing what he meant. “And you’re both okay with that?”

“Yup,” Jacob returned easily.

Paul shrugged, “I think it’s long overdue.”

The words surprised Jacob, and he nodded. He could imagine Paul had a few teasing remarks playing on his lips, too, but with Billy present, he wouldn’t utter them. 

Billy nodded, “If you’ve chosen Leah, and are able to continue doing so, then I support you.”

“Really?”

“I imagine you’re going to see each other regardless of my opinion on it,” Billy mentioned. “And, even the night you left here to follow her after dinner went awry, I could see how much you cared for her. I can imagine those feelings have grown exponentially since then. If you’re both happy, then I won’t interfere. Imprint or not. I’ll let fate take its course and let you both make your own mistakes.”

Jacob was shocked, but as his toast popped, he thanked his dad before spreading some peanut butter on it and shoving it in his mouth, turning to Paul. “You going over to Sam and Emily’s now?”

“In a few,” Paul said, chugging back some orange juice.

“I’ll wake Leah and we can all go together. Where’s Rachel?”

“Already there. Emily called and asked her to go over early.”

“Alright, wait for us.”

Jacob went back into his room, a little surprised that Leah was still asleep, and sat beside her on the small bed. “Rise and shine,” he teased, jostling her shoulder gently.

She groaned and rubbed her eyes before she woke up, tangled in his sheets, surrounded by the smell of his cologne and smirked, “Is it morning already?”

Jacob laughed and got up, “Yup and I hope you like the clothes that you wore yesterday because we have to go to Emily and Sam’s now and you overslept.”

“Ugh,” she sighed, getting up, though still feeling tired. What was up with this exhaustion lately? “Can I at least borrow something of Rachel’s?”

“I’ll see what I can find.” 

Jacob left and went into his sister’s room, opening one of her drawers to find something fresh. He rummaged through a couple before he found a pair of jeans and then opened the last drawer to grab a shirt for her.

When he peered in, however, he almost dropped the clothes in his hands. 

A small, pink, first-response pregnancy test box laid there. Jacob, without thinking, reached out and picked it up, dropping it as soon as he heard Paul behind him. 

“Man, what the-“ He stopped when he saw the pink box, and he took a deep breath before he turned and shut the door behind him so they were alone in the room. “It’s negative,” he said firmly, going over and taking the box from Jacob and pulling out the stick. It clearly said ‘No –‘ on the digital screen, and Paul put it back in the box, throwing it back in the drawer before sitting on the bed. He looked up at Jacob, who was still stood in shock and sighed. “She was late last month, so she took it to make sure she wasn’t… She’s not, so it’s not a big deal. Don’t tell Billy. I’ll get rid of it later – I thought she already had.”

Jacob didn’t know what to say, but he cleared his throat. “I was just looking for something for Leah to wear, I’m sorry, I-“

“It’s fine,” Paul said, jaw clenched shut. 

Jacob felt so out of his depth right now, and he hesitated. It was his sister they were talking about, after all, but Paul was also his friend and he could imagine the shock and fear that the small stick evoked before finding out she wasn’t pregnant for them both. “Are you guys okay?”

“We’re fine,” he returned. “I mean, I got the fright of my life when she told me, but it’s all good.” 

“I’m surprised you kept it quiet,” he referred to patrol.

Paul shrugged, “You’re not the only one used to filtering your thoughts anymore, Jake.”

“I should go… I won’t say anything, I promise. But there’s… uh, condoms in my room in my night stand if you, uh-“

“I got it covered,” Paul cut him off before quirking a brow. “Wait… you’re not using them? I thought you and Leah…”

Jacob shrugged, “She can’t get pregnant, so what’s the use?”

Paul nodded understandingly. “Right, I forgot. Anyways…”

“I’ll meet you out front.”

Jacob left and went back into his bedroom. “Here, these should fit.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, why?”

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” she said, changing quickly.

“I’m fine,” he took her hand once she was dressed. “Paul’s waiting let’s go.”

They met Paul out front and started towards Sam and Emily’s in quiet. Leah felt like something was up but decided to stay out of it for now. 

When they got there, Rachel, Kim, Emily, Seth, Quil, and Embry were all close by, and over near the front balcony Sam was flipping burgers on the grill with Jared, the younger wolves throwing the football around in the yard. She may have just gotten up, but it was getting close to lunchtime. 

“Hey Jake!” Quil called as he approached.

“Hey man, everyone here now?” 

“I think so,” Seth said easily. 

“I finished covering my patrols,” Leah said quietly to Jacob as Paul ran over to Jared and Sam and Quil started teasing Seth about Abigail. “I guess that means you should pick a new Beta.”

He nodded, “Who do you recommend?”

Leah shrugged, “It isn’t up to me.”

“I did say I wasn’t picking a third-in-command, and that in my absence, you would pick a new Beta, so I think this constitutes you picking your replacement.”

“Choose Seth.”

“I think that’s a little bias, don’t you?” He asked teasingly, mainly wanting her to explain further.

“Seth is a good judge of character. He can determine right from wrong and believes the best in everyone. He would listen to you, but also speak his mind against what he thinks is right. I mean, he definitely won’t be as vocal or argumentative as me,” she smirked. “Because until he realized we were sleeping together, he idolized you-“

“I’m not sure he idolizes me anymore,” Jacob smirked. “I mean, banging his sister didn’t get me many brownie points.” She rolled her eyes. “Okay, I’ll rename Seth. Or you can. I can call a pack meeting. I should let them know what’s going on anyway and give anyone else who wants the out the option now that everything is pretty well back to normal.”

“Alright, let me know when and I’ll make sure the house is ready. It’s a little bit of a mess now.”

As Leah heard Sam call for everyone to gather around, she sighed, and Jacob tightened his grip on her hand. “You okay?”

“Fine,” she said uneasily. “I’m going to see if I can talk to the both of them after this, actually.”

“About?” This couldn’t be good.

“It’s time to put the bad blood aside – for good. I texted her congratulations, so she wouldn’t think I was upset, but I haven’t actually talked to her face to face.” Despite Emily’s numerous texting attempts and check-ins the past week, especially when they informed every one of the gathering today to tell them all.

Jacob nodded, apprehensive about it, but proud of her for doing the exact opposite of what Emily expected her to do. “Well, if you need me, I’ll be here.” 

Their eyes met and he wanted to kiss her immediately, but everyone was there and very aware of their ‘arrangement’ having ended. They kind of had a new arrangement, now, though. Fuck it! Jacob leaned down and kissed her softly on the lips – a kiss she easily returned, and that sparked everyone’s attention. But, thankfully, today was about Sam and Emily, so despite their confusion over the two lip-locked wolves, they turned back to Sam and Emily. He would be in for it later, but for now, they felt like every other normal couple – despite his imprint looming over them.

Leah didn’t care about the guys thoughts anymore. She deserved to be happy, even if it was only for a little while and the way Jacob’s hand felt in hers made her feel stronger – something she needed going into the conversation with Sam and Emily. 

Everyone finally came together, and Emily and Sam came forward in the middle of the yard, Emily’s belly now very noticeable to her, Sam beside her, beaming. Leah only felt a small pang in her chest knowing her story with him was over and that it wasn’t her growing beside him. 

“Ready?” Sam asked Emily, both beaming with love and happiness. 

“So, Emily and I just wanted to get everyone together today to let you all know that,” he looked down to Emily and let her finish.

“We’re having a baby!”

Leah watched, feeling as though she was watching strangers. Finally, their happiness didn’t make her angry or hurt. She was just happy for them. Maybe a little jealous, but nonethless, happy. Everyone broke out into congratulations and happiness and Leah filtered into the background easily.

“A baby,” Seth said easily beside her after congratulating Sam and Emily. “Woah. I mean, I know they’re married but a baby is… next level.”

“Yup,” Quil said, popping the ‘p’. “Hopefully it’s a girl, can you imagine another one of Sam?” His words were teasing, but Leah smirked.

“And what the Hell is up with you two?” Embry asked, turning toward Leah and Jacob.

“What do you mean?” Jacob asked casually, a knowing glint in his eye.

Seth frowned, “Don’t hurt her. I’m serious, Jacob. If you-“

“Hey, you came!” Emily called, coming up behind her, breaking the boys out of their conversation.

“Of course. Congratulations,” Leah said, turning to face her.

Emily’s eyes were full of happy tears, and Leah felt her own smile reflect Emily’s joy as Sam walked up behind her, too.

Leah nodded, “Actually, can I, uh, steal you both for a minute? I wanted to talk to you in private.”

Emily nodded, wanting nothing more than to have Leah around more, but a little worried considering they hadn’t actually gotten to tell her the way they wanted to. “Of course, let’s go inside.”

The three of them went inside, awkward tension surrounding them. Sam knew better than to think Leah would ruin this day for them, but still prepared himself for a difficult conversation.

They all went into the living room and Sam sat in his armchair while Emily and Leah sat on the couch, side by side. “I’m sorry for not telling you myself,” Emily sighed.

“Don’t worry about it, I know it wasn’t an easy choice for you,” she said honestly. “But I am really happy for you both, I swear.”

“Thank you,” Sam said, letting out a breath that he hadn’t realized he had been holding. “We didn’t want to hurt you-“

“I’m not hurt,” she said firmly. “I’m okay. For… well, once in a long time, I feel like I’m in a good place.”

“Do this have anything to do with your PDA with Jacob earlier?” Emily teased.

Leah took a deep breath in, “I mean… he’s helped a lot, yeah.” He hesitated before uttering her next words. “I, uh, told him how I feel about him.” Emily was aware, Hell, everyone honestly was, but it was her first time admitting it in front of Sam. 

“What did he say?”

She shrugged, “He didn’t say it back, because of the imprint, but he didn’t have to. I know how he feels. We’re just… going to wait and see what happens.”

“Well, I think your hearts healed a lot with him.”

“Be careful,” Sam said finally. 

“I will be,” she promised. “But this isn’t about me and Jacob,” Leah said carefully, looking between them both. “I wanted to apologize-“

“Leah, no-“ Emily started, but Leah cut her off.

“No, seriously… I need to.”

They both looked expectantly at Leah. If Sam was unnerved being in a room with his pregnant wife and his ex-girlfriend who he had been madly in love with at one point, he didn’t show it. Emily looked to Sam as Leah finally met both of their eyes. Emily squeezed her hand again. Whether it was for encouragement or she was just nervous, Leah couldn’t tell. 

She took a deep breath in before starting. This conversation was long overdue - painful and awkward, but necessary. “Sam… When we broke-up, I blamed you for making me feel not good enough for you; for us. I thought you leaving was my fault since I had been so nagging last going off when things got rocky. Then when you met Emily… I blamed you for taking my best friend away and for being just like your dad. I blamed you for so many things that weren’t really your fault, and being without you and blaming you turned me into someone who I didn’t even recognized and then I blamed you for that, too.”  
”Now that I know the whole story and the truth and have had ample time to process what it means, I’m grateful that you ended things when you did; to give me a chance at finding happiness when you knew it wasn’t me who you’d spend your life with, so thank you for being strong enough to let me go because I know now that it wasn’t easy for you. I’m sorry for being so terrible to you since we broke up. I’ve come to terms with the fact that it wasn’t about you or me, but it just wasn’t our story - it’s just taken me longer than I’d like to admit.”

Sam felt his heart racing in his chest, and he frowned, feeling his eyes burning with unshed tears and seeing her eyes brim with dampness, too. He got up and took the footrest over before her and sat in front of her, taking her hands in his. She didn’t recoil, and he was glad.

“Leah,” Sam said unsteadily, his voice choked up. “I never wanted you to feel those things. I love you enough that I never want you to ever feel those things ever again.” It’s why Jacob terrified him as a suitor for her, but he couldn’t voice his concerns when she seemed so happy with him and he had seemed to do her well thus far. He would be there if she needed him when things went South, but he wouldn’t stand in the way of her happiness with him until then. He couldn’t. “But you really don’t have to apologize. The way you acted… I don’t blame you. I blame myself.” And he would forever. “I could have handled things a lot differently; better. I’m sorry that I couldn’t be who you needed me to be.”

Leah felt a tear fall down her cheek and she heard Emily sniff beside her. “I know, and I know I said I forgave you before, and that we both knew it was a load of bullshit, but I really do mean it now. I forgive you, Sam, and I want to us to be friends and… not be walking around on eggshells around each other; especially with a baby involved.” It still hurt, but not nearly as much as before. She missed the man he used to be; the man she loved, but he wasn’t him anymore. He had grown up and moved on, and it was time for her to finally allow herself to do the same. “We’re different people now and I hope you forgive me, too.”

Sam let her hand go and reached out, pulling her close into an embrace. He felt his own tears falling down his face, and he smoothed her hair, keeping his eyes shut tightly. “Leah, there is nothing to forgive.” He pulled back, peering in her eyes, but his gaze didn’t hurt her heart anymore. “I want nothing but love for you, no matter what, okay? I’ll always be in your corner. If that’s Jacob, then I’m happy for you.”

His words surprised her, but she nodded, feeling a weight lifted off her shoulders. “Thank you.” 

She took a deep breath in before turning to Emily, whose face was soaked with tears. “Emily,” she said reaching over to take her hand again. “I have so much to apologize to you for. Things that I can’t even begin to fix. I feel extremely regretful that we couldn’t get past everything before I missed the most important milestones in your life. I know you didn’t ask for this – and I would never want you to give it back, even if you could.” She flashed back to when Emily told her before her honeymoon that she would have given it back if she could have. “I see how happy he makes you, and I want that for the both of you. I’m sorry for comparing myself to you so much that I couldn’t stand to look at you – for blaming you for taking Sam away from me and wishing you never came to La Push. I’m sorry for being so insecure with myself that I blamed you for making me feel insignificant and unworthy of Sam. I love you, and I always will, and I… I just hope you’ll forgive me and my pride.”

“Leah,” Emily said, trying to clear her throat and wipe her tears away. Emily felt her belly flutter and she smiled, reaching over to place Leah’s hand on her belly so she could feel it. It only brought more tears. “We forgive you – all of us. Always. We deserved your scorn for what we did, and I understand that what we did was terrible to you, regardless if it was something we chose or not. I never thought you’d forgive me, and I’m very grateful for your kind heart. I want you to be happy, and I hope so much that we can be friends again.”

Leah nodded, “I mean, it’s going to take some work, but I’m here to work on it and I want to be close again. It will never be like it was, but that doesn’t mean that it can’t be better.”

“I’m so happy to hear that,” Emily said, hugging her friend tightly. 

The girls pulled back and she heard Sam get up and move back to his seat, just as someone sat on the opposite side of her on the couch. She recognized his cologne immediately, even before she looked. He reached out to snake his arm around her waist and pull her into him. “Well said, Clearwater.” She hadn’t known he was there and felt a little embarrassed, but he kissed her hair and she felt stronger beside him.

“So,” Emily said hesitantly. “You finally decided to admit your feelings for each other?”

Leah blushed, and Jacob chuckled, but shifted uncomfortably. “Something like that.” He looked between Sam and Emily before looking back to Leah, nuzzling his face into her hair, unable to resist the intense desire to touch and be near her.

“Do you love her?” Sam asked, point blank.

Jacob hadn’t said the words, pointedly, to spare her anymore pain that what was already coming – spare them both, but he felt the pressure of the situation – to live up to someone worthy of Leah in Sam’s eyes. “She’s amazing, Sam. I won’t hurt her intentionally.”

“I can take care of myself,” Leah said firmly.

“Don’t I know it,” Jacob smirked before turning his attention back to Sam and Emily. “I’m done worrying about the imprint,” he said strongly. “Until it becomes reality.”

Leah looked up to him and kissed him softly. 

Emily giggled, “Alright, we’re going to leave you two lovebirds alone.”

Leah blushed, and pulled back. “Wait – seriously, I can’t wait to meet the baby. Congratulations.”

Emily and Sam smiled and nodded their thanks before leaving and joining the others.

Jacob kissed her passionately as soon as they had the room to themselves, and Leah felt her body respond appropriately. When they realized they were becoming a little too hot and heavy for Emily and Sam’s living couch, Leah pulled back.

“Let’s go to my place – Seth’s here so…”

“How about we find another tree?”

Leah smirked and bit her lower lip. “I like the sound of that.”

Their passionate woodland intimacy session didn’t take long to initiate and about an hour later, they ended up in her bedroom, wrapped up in the sheets together, thankful that Seth was still at Sam and Emily’s. Luckily, her back was spared this time, but her nail marks were all over his.

Laying there with her, he finally decided a good way to test the imprint with Leah. Depending on how it went, maybe he could tell her how he felt without Nessie being fully matured. She was so close already that it made him wonder if much would really change between now and then. His wolf had been weirdly quiet ever since the clearing, so maybe it was finally letting him be happy?

“Your hair is getting longer,” he noted as he smoothed it.

She nodded, reaching up to touch it. It was down to her chest now, just brushing the top of her cleavage. “Yeah, it’s nice to not have to cut it anymore.” Her hair always grew fast, which meant a lot of trims when she was phasing to keep the length manageable. 

She remembered when she cut it originally.

She had been in her bathroom, not long after she first phased. She had promised Sam she would never cut her hair – he loved it. Standing there, with scissors in her hand, she was intent to break the last promise she had left to be able to be broken. 

Her hair was wet, cascading down her back, down to her tailbone. She hadn’t really considered the implications of her decision. She knew she had to cut it anyways because of the pack, so as she brought the scissors up, just under her jawline, she didn’t hesitate in pushing the blades together. She had been angry and upset and ready for a change.

She remembered Seth whining on the other side of the door for her to hurry up in the bathroom. He had to get ready for school and she had been soaking in the tub a while, getting the courage to make this necessary change, but he wasn’t important right now. He knocked on the door with his fist, causing it to vibrate against the door frame thanks to his newfound wolf strength, and then finally, he stalked off to go find their mom to make Leah come out. 

As she saw the lock of hair that she had cut fall to the floor, she only felt disbelief. The empty feeling that she had felt since the break-up and her dad’s funeral had finally shattered as she brought the scissors back up and cut more hair from her head. Her hair had always been long – beautiful, and knowing how much Sam loved it fueled her desire to cut it all away now that he had cut her off. Staring at it on the floor, though, made her chest hurt.

As much as she couldn’t wait to see Sam’s face when he saw her again, she felt incomplete without her long locks. With another clip, more hair fell and, suddenly, warm, salty tears fell from her eyes, a sob catching in the back of her throat. She dropped the scissors, staring at the botched job she had done on her hair as her mom knocked on the door, telling her she had enough time in the bathroom – and seemingly exhausted from still having to be the mediator between the kids even into adulthood. 

Leah reached out automatically and unlocked the door. Sue stepped in, with tired eyes, and when she saw her, they went wide; shocked. “Leah…” She immediately pulled Leah into her arms, and her daughter’s body shook with sobs. Seth was staring, disbelieving, on the other side of the door, before he went back to his room. 

After what felt like forever and she had no more tears left, Sue reached down and picked up the scissors. “Come here,” she said motherly, fixing the terrible job that Leah had done, and making it even.

Jacob’s voice shattered the memory.

“Do you want to come over to the Cullen’s with me?” He asked, as she laid against his chest, seemingly deep in thought.

“That is probably the dumbest question you’ve ever asked me,” she teased, shaking off the nostalgia. 

“I may need some back-up,” he smirked.

“Jake, I don’t need to go with you to see Renesmee.”

He knew it was a cruel question to ask her when he knew how she felt, but he wanted to test it out – have both women in the same room and see what his imprint forced on him and if what he felt for Leah could withstand the imprint’s pull to this point. It was the only thing he could determine to test his fate. “Come, for me – I’ll even buy you dinner on the way home, plus, I thought that we could talk to Carlisle and see if he’s figured anything out.”

She wasn’t sure why he wanted her to go, but she did kind of want to spend some more time with him. She knew from his thoughts and what he had told her that his imprint was complicated, but she hadn’t even seen them together for… well, a while. Since New Year’s Eve. Maybe it would be revealing to go and see what happened. Plus, it would be nice to see if Carlisle found anything, despite the pull lacking since the clearing. “Fine, but I’m starving, so get your wallet ready.”

Jacob smirked, and rolled his eyes as they both got up and dressed and went to grab his bike. He handed her the extra helmet and got on the front. “Hold on tight, Clearwater.”

Leah enjoyed having her arms wrapped tightly around Jacob’s waist as they spun off toward the Cullen’s. Jacob felt the absence of Leah as they arrived and got off as he kicked his bike’s stand down. They put their helmets on the handlebars before they walked inside to the Cullen’s. 

He didn’t see anyone at first and he walked upstairs to Carlisle’s study, knocking on the door. Carlisle called for him to enter, and Jacob went inside with Leah – who seemed unnerved as usual around vampires.

“Jacob,” Carlisle greeted before seeing Leah following. “Leah, nice to see you.” She nodded curtly and Jacob shut the door behind them before hovering in the doorway. “Have you seen Renesmee?”

“Not yet, we wanted to talk to you, first,” Jacob said. 

Carlisle looked nervous suddenly, but the expression was fleeting. “I have done some research,” he said, guessing at what he meant. “Do you both want to sit down?”

Jacob hesitated but gestured for Leah to follow him and Carlisle got up from his desk and sat in the armchair opposite a couch, where Jacob and Leah sat. 

“Did you find out anything about this pull?”

“I don’t feel it anymore,” Leah admitted.

“What?” Jacob turned to her, clearly confused. 

She shrugged, looking between Jacob and Carlisle. “Since the clearing… I haven’t felt it.”

“We’ve slept together since, though,” he said, trying to forget Carlisle was there to hear this.

“I didn’t say I didn’t want to sleep with you anymore, just… the part of it that felt out of control or well, forced, is gone. Don’t you feel it?”

Jacob hesitated, “I haven’t noticed. For me, the sexual chemistry is still there.” Then again, he hadn’t necessarily been completely on board with her theory, anyways. He felt the chemistry all along, but nothing had changed for him since the clearing; unless you counted wanting her even more after hearing her express her affection toward him.

“I’m not saying it isn’t there for me,” she argued, taking his hand. “I still… want you, but before, it was suffocating. The morning after the clearing was the only time that I felt even remotely… placated with the sexual energy between us. Before that I think we could have stayed in bed all day and it wouldn’t have made a difference. Since then, obviously, there’s sexual chemistry, but it’s not… palpable every second of every day. It feels more normal.” She was blushing, knowing Carlisle was listening, but avoided his gaze.

Jacob hesitated, taking in her words and the specific time that she said it ended – the clearing. “I haven’t felt the imprint as strong since then, either.”

“What?”

He sighed, “Every time that I slept with you until then… I always felt guilty because of the imprint. But since then, all I’ve felt is… well, happy.”

“So, the clearing,” Carlisle said, trying to piece it together. “Last week. You both experienced… changes?” They both looked to Carlisle and Leah nodded, vaguely aware that Jacob was holding her hand. “Is there anything that you can think of that would have… initiated this change from that night?”

Leah paused, and Jacob looked down to her, taking a deep breath. “Lee…”

“He doesn’t need to know that.”

“What if it… affected something? What if this ‘bigger force’ you kept referring to is involved somehow, and this changed things?”

Carlisle let them debate, and Leah sighed. “Fine.”

Jacob looked to Carlisle as Leah averted his gaze. “Leah and I slept together for the first time in a while. We expressed our feelings for each other.”

Unfortunately, something like that didn’t exactly correlate with his research, but, well, it was something. “Okay,” he said levelly. “So, just to go off-topic for a moment, I can kind of understand why the… intense chemistry died off, if my predictions correct. Unfortunately, it has nothing to do with why your imprint seemed to change – or anything to do with why it all happened at once.” Carlisle rested his foot on his knee and sat back. “So, can we remove all… human emotions for a moment?”

“Easy for a vamp,” Leah muttered.

Jacob ignored her and nodded, appreciating Carlisle’s help and wishing she would do the same.

“When was the first time you slept together?”

“January 14th,” Leah answered. 

“Sam and Emily’s wedding was the 13th,” Jacob pointed out.

Leah looked over at him and rolled her eyes, “We slept together after midnight – the 14th.”

“Oh, right.”

Carlisle nodded. “So… Wolf mating season is between January and April. Traditionally, the Alpha male, and the Alpha female mate together to create a stronger wolf. The… courtship is usually short but intense, and they mate for life to strengthen the pack. If we can get a little primal, here, the facts are… well, not too far off base of the truth. Your wolf nature was pushing you together. It’s not the only culprit, I don’t believe, but I think that’s where the explosive chemistry came from; your wolves thought that the best chance at reproduction was together – to create a stronger wolf. And now that it’s March, it’s possible that the mating season has ended, which makes sense for the… change in intensity. It hasn’t completely taken away the sexual impulse because you’ve already made a strong connection, on a more human level, which also makes sense for your feelings for one another, and that courtship probably kicked off the mating season, but it does explain the change of intensity.”

Carlisle may as well have been speaking Dutch because Leah was finding it very difficult to follow and was immediately disgusted. She cringed at the thought and avoided looking at both Carlisle and Jacob, feeling a pit growing in her stomach.

Through her unease, however, she found a logical flaw in his explanation. “I can’t get pregnant as a wolf, though, or maybe ever, so how did our… instincts not get that message?”

Carlisle nodded, “Well, my explanation is simply revolving around typical animal tendency. You’re a shapeshifter and spend time in both wolf and human form, so it’s possible that the animalistic nature to mate was still there, regardless if as a human, you could participate in the reproduction. Of course, it’s only speculation on my part, but it makes sense as to the chemistry – whether it could have worked physically or not.”

“My wolf imprinted,” Jacob said. “So, if my wolf drove me to try and… reproduce with Leah, then why the hell did I imprint on Renesmee?” Even saying the word reproduce made him uncomfortable, but he had so many questions and Leah looked to have more of her own. 

“Well, that brings me to my next point – you have no idea why wolves imprint. You assume it’s either for reproduction, or to make a stronger wolf, correct?” Jacob nodded, and Carlisle continued. “Maybe it’s a combination of both. Maybe it’s just to make a wolf stronger, I can’t say for sure.”

They were getting a lot of speculation here, Leah thought idly, not exactly anything concrete, but she still felt intrigued – even if it wasn’t proven maybe Carlisle’s information could still be of use somehow.

“Maybe,” Carlisle said. “Renesmee makes you a stronger wolf because she was the catalyst for you claiming your birth right as Alpha; to protect her. Maybe imprinting is trivial, and it just happens by chance. Who knows, but reproduction may not necessarily be the only, or the main cause for imprinting. With you and Nessie… well, it kind of almost pushes the theory of making a stronger wolf than it does reproduction. If it does happen in efforts to make a stronger wolf, she had already served her purpose in your life by the time you and Leah were stuck in the mating season together, so your wolf probably realized the potential there for furthering your gene pools and to create a strong bloodline. Your imprint may feel differently than the others because they weren’t affected by the mating season. Only the rightful Alpha and the Alpha female would mate together. So, with the new development of female wolves into your ranks, it could possibly challenge an imprint.”

“I really don’t ever want to hear those words again,” Leah groaned. Mating season? Kill her now. Her ears perked up at the last part, though. It could possibly challenge an imprint. Then again, this was all a guessing game and despite Carlisle’s intelligence, there was no way of testing and proving any of this. 

“Like I said, think primally,” Carlisle chuckled. “You’re both a good match together and would most likely make a very fierce wolf if you could and that would protect the pack’s legacy moving forward. It’s biology, and its also likely that your wolves knew that before you did, or well, understood what it was doing. But, the feelings you have now, they’re completely natural; human, which is why you’re still attracted to each other and care for each other. Jasper can attest to those, if you’d like.”

“I do not want to have a litter of pups,” Leah groaned, feeling the absurdity in all of this. Why didn’t she just think to Google ‘wolf sex’ during her own research? Actually… yeah, never mind.

“At least we know where the… chemistry came from?” Jacob supplied, trying not to laugh at the disgusted look on her face.

“You wanting to mount me!?”

Despite the seriousness of the conversation, Jacob and Carlisle couldn’t help but to chuckle.

“You want to know the worst part of this?” Leah grumbled. “This actually isn’t the most insane thing I’ve ever heard. It is, however, probably the most disturbing.”

Jacob chuckled and kissed the side of her head. “Well, if Carlisle’s right, you heard him – wolves’ mate for life.” And maybe, he thought, he could choose Leah – challenge the imprint, but he didn’t want to say the words aloud in case they were untrue.

“If you ever use the word mating to describe…” her words cut off, knowing they had an audience. “Choose your words wisely, Black.”

“So… this happened because she’s the first female wolf, which is why we had no prior… well, indication of anything like this?”

Carlisle nodded, “Precisely.”

“Don’t even say it,” Leah said through gritted teeth, immediately looking at Jacob.

“Well we have to tell everyone,” he said offensively. “Don’t you think it would have been nice to know this tidbit of information before now? If there are any more future female wolves…”

“We don’t even know if this is concrete, it’s just speculation!”

Jacob shrugged, “Researched speculation that has merit.”

“Only in the animal kingdom, not entirely proven on how it translates to shapeshifters,” she pointed out. 

“Still, they need to know. We need to pass down as much knowledge about what we are – or could be, as possible, so the bloodlines, traditions, and legends stay alive in future generations.”

“Kill me now,” she groaned. “The guys will have a fucking field day with this. Just think of the mental pictures.” She sighed and let her face fall into her hands. “This is terrible.”

“So if you’re right and we’re passed the mating season,” Jacob said awkwardly, ignoring Leah’s clear embarrassment. “I… uh, I don’t feel any different. She says the intensity has changed for her, but it hasn’t lessened for me.” 

Carlisle didn’t need Edward to read Jacob’s mind – he just nodded. “You being apprehensive of her claim to begin with makes sense, actually. A female wolf approaches the mating season differently, so it makes sense why Leah felt it a differently than you did – plus your heightened testosterone would agree with a high sex drive anyways, as a human. Without blood work from Leah, I can’t attest to her levels. Leah’s wolf, however, would have been in heat, so to speak, which initialized the mating season. Female wolves dictate the urge to reproduce. Male wolves are more willing to mate at any time of the year but are only actually able to when the female allows.” He knew more about wolf mating than he cared to at this point.

“This literally cannot get any worse,” she looked up to meet Jacob’s eyes. “If the guys picture your wolf mounting me, or say one word about me being in heat, I swear, I will-“

“Leah…” Jacob shook his head, unable to stop the grin from spreading across his lips. Was it embarrassing? Kind of, but, like Carlisle said, it was human – or, animal nature. Sex felt good as a human, it was fun, and the wolves were edging them on to… well, continue their legacy. At least it was something he could understand and put reason to, and explained his imprint being different, but the look of embarrassment on Leah’s face was priceless. That, and well, she was the one ‘in heat’, not him, so it was a little more hilarious from his perspective.

“This isn’t funny, wipe the grin off your face, or I’ll do it for you.”

Jacob chuckled and reached over, cupping her cheek. “It’s natural.”

“The most natural thing,” Carlisle agreed, causing her to think back to her mother’s similar words during their conversation about it.

Sex is as natural as you can get. Even animals have it figured out.

Well if her life wasn’t a constant foreshadowing of something worse impending, she would have been surprised at this new development, but nope, just same old fucked up insanity as usual. 

“Well, thank you for looking into it,” Jacob said finally. “We will… bring this new information to light with the elders and the pack to see how to process it and pass it down moving forward.”

“The elders!?” Leah exclaimed again. “No way, not happening. I’m not being a part of that conversation.”

“You already told your mom about this,” he said pointedly.

“Do you really want to sit in front of Sam and explain how your wolf wants to mount me?”

“You’re really caught up in this whole mounting thing, huh?”

“How else do you think wolves mate!?”

Jacob rubbed the back of his neck and sighed, “I will assure them all of our… activities happened in human flesh, okay?”

“No, no way-“

“You’re not the only one affected by this Leah. It’s… awkward for both of us, plus it’s important for the future if another female phases, how many times do I have to tell you that? I don’t want to explain our sex life to anyone, but it’s kind of necessary considering.”

She shut up, crossing her arms over her chest in both embarrassment and annoyance.

“Thank you, Carlisle,” Jacob said finally, knowing that he won their argument for now.

Jacob got up, and Leah followed suit. Carlisle stayed seated, though. “Renesmee is in the cottage – you really should see her before you go, Jacob.”

“Is she okay?” He asked immediately, feeling his wolf perk up for the first time in a week at Renesmee’s well-being being questioned. 

“She’s fine, just… wanted to speak with you.”

He nodded, realizing Carlisle wasn’t telling him something, but left with Leah and went out the front door of the Cullen’s, walking out back to the cottage.

“That was the most humiliating thing ever.”

Jacob chuckled, “I happen to like the mating season.”

“Jake,” she groaned as they continued walking to the cottage, realizing she really didn’t want to see Renesmee after all – or allow Edward to possibly read her now troubled mind. “I can go, seriously… I don’t need to be here for this. I think I’ve had enough of the Cullen’s for today.”

“It’s fine, it shouldn’t take long,” he promised. “Then we can go get some food.”

“Like a date?” 

Jacob stopped walking; their fingers still intertwined. “Like a date,” he said softly, squeezing her hand.

“A date kind of seems trivial now that I know that your wolf was trying to impregnate me,” she couldn’t help but to finally laugh at the idea, her cheeks still heated. “Kind of surpassed first base and went right for the home run, huh?”

Laughter was clearly the dominant thing today because he laughed again, unable to help it. “I can still try after dinner?” He mused. “I mean, for old time’s sake.”

“Maybe a condom is a good idea, after all,” Leah mused. “Frozen eggs or not, I still feel kind of violated.”

“Oh Leah.”

“A date with Jacob Black,” she said finally, changing the subject. “Never in my life did I think that would make me happy.”

He smirked, “And never in my life did I think that when I was sitting on those cliffs stewing about Bella and you were making me think of all the creative ways to throw you off the cliff, that we could even have a non-antagonistic conversation, but here we are.”

“Yup. Here we are. Trying to knock me up and all.” She had to find the humor in it, or else she would never get over the disturbing nature of it. Natural or not, it was weird. 

“You’ve changed,” he said gently as they started walking again, the small cottage coming into view.

“So have you.”

They walked in silence the rest of the way and Jacob dropped Leah’s hand and knocked politely before Bella answered.

“Jake,” she said happily, her face falling when she saw Leah.

Renesmee was behind her in an instant, in the door, and as soon as Jacob laid eyes on her, he felt it. His entire planet shifted. Renesmee stood there at approximately 5’8”, her long brown hair with a red tinge when the sun hit it, her porcelain skin sparkling, and Jacob felt his heart clench.

He almost felt like falling to his knees in front of the beautiful woman and maybe he would have if not for the fact that the woman who he had begged to come along and who he had been falling for was right next to him. He knew whatever look that was currently on his face would betray his true feelings to Leah and possibly hurt her unintentionally, but he was desperately trying to keep it together. Unfortunately, she had been through this before with Sam – eerily similar, and knew what had happened immediately. 

“Hello Jacob, Leah,” she nodded politely. 

“Ness.. you’re…”

“Full grown,” she provided for him. “Yup. Woke up this morning three inches taller and… well, like this.”

“Carlisle…” Jacob started, feeling like a complete idiot.

“Said her mental and physical capacity is complete,” Bella answered his unspoken question.

“Do you both want to come in?” Nessie asked softly, her voice changed slightly along with her matured appearance. “I’d like to talk with Jacob.”

Suddenly, weirdly enough, Jacob wished for Sam in that moment – to help him understand. He had to try to mitigate this situation, knowing whatever this conversation held wasn’t something that Leah would want to hear, but he felt terrible after practically begging her to come, and literally having been in bed with her hours ago. He hadn’t expected Renesmee to have grown into a woman overnight – he had only seen her days prior. However, as he turned to face his Beta, he felt another wave of power flood over him – the love he had for her, and it wasn’t dulled by the force of his imprint like Sam’s had been. Oh, this was complicated. “Can you go back to the reservation and wait for me there? I’ll find you after.” He handed her the keys to the motorcycle, but she declined them.

She turned on her heel, masking whatever she was thinking well, but Jacob reached out and grabbed her wrist. He took a step toward her as she turned to face him, he pulled her against his chest. He couldn’t have her thinking he didn’t care and honestly? He didn’t want her to see his face. Leah, slightly confused, left after that and went into the brush. She thought about phasing, but decided she needed some time in her own head space. Jacob was gone – just like that, and for whatever stupid reasoning, she felt a couple of rogue tears slip down her cheeks as she left. She was never enough – never would be enough. Her happiness was always short-lived. She should have known better and had no one to blame but herself for her happy delusions: to be hopeful for any positive outcome. Hope. What a stupid word.

Renesmee felt a little awkward seeing him hug Leah, but her dad had told her that Jacob and Leah had something special – something like what they had. When she left, Renesmee stepped outside and took his hand, leading him out the front door and over to the side of the house, just inside the brush at the edge of their property line. There was a big rock there that she sat on as the sun streamed through the trees and hit her skin in various places. Jacob was fascinated more so than ever before, and he knew he had to tread cautiously. 

He stayed stood about two feet away and Renesmee smiled, patting the rock beside her. “I won’t bite,” she said, feeling amused herself at the pun.

“Can never be too sure,” he teased forcibly, trying to make the situation more comfortable. He took a deep breath in and went over beside her, sitting next to her on the rock, keeping space between them.

“I had a pretty intensive talk with my parents this morning,” she admitted. “So, I think I’m pretty well up to speed on what I should be.”

Jacob nodded, “What did you guys discuss exactly?”

“Well, how this all came into fruition,” she said maturely.

Jacob nodded, sitting beside her, but not touching her. “So, what can I clarify for you?”

Nessie shrugged, “Nothing, really. I just… wanted to see you. Now that things are… well, changed.”

Changed was putting it mildly. 

Nessie reached over and gently took Jacob’s hand, awkwardly stringing her small fingers through his bigger ones. Jacob felt the power that the small touch brought, and he gulped as a lump formed in his throat. Nessie was here, fully matured, and clearly wanted to be with him and now the ball was in his court. He remembered Carlisle’s words from earlier and decided the older vamp’s conclusions on his situation with Leah, had a lot of merit:

With the new development of female wolves into your ranks, it could possibly challenge an imprint. 

Only minutes prior, he wanted to jump on that statement and do just that – choose Leah, but now, with Renesmee in front of him, he felt his inner wolf come alive again and it pushed him toward Nessie more fiercely than ever before, his inner man protesting every step of the way. 

“Ness...” Jacob said softly. “You know that we’re imprinted, but… What do you want?”

She had so many unanswered questions, even from her chat earlier with her parents – things she didn’t feel appropriate to ask them, or even Jacob, really, considering her new status to love and relationships. But they didn’t have much time – not with her parents telling her it was time for them to go. They had to move before anyone caught sight of her – somewhere new where they could blend in. It was a long time coming. They were getting together with the rest of the family as soon as she finished talking to Jacob and then, once things were set in motion, she knew she had to tell Jacob – and give him the option to either stay in La Push or come with them.

“What do you want, Jacob?” She asked finally.

“I care about you,” he said finally. “But I need to know how you feel.” His wolf had to know.

She shrugged, “You already know. You’re my Jacob, right?”

He struggled to find the right words, “I’m always going to be your imprint.”

“And now… that means we’re romantic, right?”

“Do you want to be romantic?” Renesmee blushed and Jacob took a deep breath, squeezing her hand. “I want you to be able to talk to me; I need you to.”

She looked up to meet his eyes underneath her lashes and licked her lips to moisten them before she sighed, “I think you’re very attractive.” Her words were innocent in comparison to his she-wolf, but they held power – the force of the imprint. He felt the wolf jump for joy at her admission, but his man wouldn’t allow him to celebrate just yet.

“So you do want to start something romantic? You have a choice here, Ness. I won’t… force anything on you.”

“I want to if you want to. Do you?”

Jacob couldn’t answer. His confliction, much like when Leah told him how she felt, kept his mouth shut. He was doing shit at managing these two relationships, that much was obvious. “I’d like to see what that’s like,” he finally admitted, betraying the part of him that loved Leah, but knowing he would never be able to make a sound choice without testing the imprints waters. If he wanted to choose Leah, he had to be sure that he could. 

“I’d like that,” she whispered.

She was so pure; so innocent. So undamaged. Almost like Bella when she first returned to Forks.

He felt like he was about to corrupt her just looking at her, and she surprised him when she closed her eyes and moved to brush her lips against his. Against his better judgement, he felt himself melt into her lips and when he kissed her back, he felt the crackle of spark the imprint held drawing them closer. He reached up, letting his fingers tangle in her long hair, lips moving slowly but passionately against hers and she re-positioned herself so that she was completely facing him on the rock, their torso’s pressing together, her legs draped over his. He pulled back, breaking the kiss, eyes still closed as his forehead pressed against hers.

Renesmee spoke, breaking the silence, and he opened his eyes to look into hers. “That was… intense,” she admitted. “Better than I imagined.”

“You imagined this?”

She nodded, taking a deep breath. “Yeah, you’ve… had my attention for a while, now, but when I woke up this morning, I felt… whole. Like I was finally ready to be yours.”

To be his. His chest hurt – he wanted to want her completely and utterly, but the she-wolf was plaguing his mind in that moment, and it told him a lot about his relationship with her. If he could be so conflicted after sitting there, kissing Renesmee, there had to be a reason, right? He also, admittedly, hadn’t pictured this. His imprint was so innocent before now that he had trouble believing it could reach romantic heights. He had also been too busy exploring a romantic connection with Leah to let his thoughts wander to Renesmee. He wasn’t sure what to say, yet again, and she broke the silence. 

“I should go,” Renesmee said sweetly. “We were getting ready to go to the main house when you came – to see everyone and talk. The others are just getting back from feeding.”

Jacob nodded, “Alright. When will I see you again?”

“Can you come by Sunday?” She knew there would be a lot for her family to discuss between now and then and wanted to wait to see him again until she knew what was going on and would be able to tell him and answer any questions that he had. 

It was Tuesday, March 20th, and Jacob nodded. “Of course.”

“Around 8?”

He nodded and she got up off the rock. He followed suit and hugged her gently. When she pulled back, and looked up to him, he hesitated before pressing his lips to hers for a moment, feeling as though he should. “I’ll see you at 8 on Sunday,” he promised before she turned happily on her heel and went back to the cottage.

He sat back down on the rock and cursed when he heard the cabin door shut. What the fuck was he supposed to do now? He thought today would give him clarity, but he was more confused than ever before.

He wasn’t sure how long he was there before he heard a familiar voice behind him. He turned seeing Sam. They hadn’t seen eye to eye in so long and it felt weird to be grateful for his presence. 

“Hey. Leah came to get me,” he admitted. “She asked me to make sure you were okay, but she wouldn’t tell me anything.”

So she had caught the torn look on his face. He knew she had, but he had hoped that he had imagined the betrayal in her eyes. “Is she okay?”

Sam’s brow furrowed. “Leah? She seemed okay, she’s with Emily and Rachel at our place. Do you need me to... explain anything?” After Leah had held up in her bedroom all evening after Seth imprinted, Sam and he had a very long conversation about imprinting – like he did with every wolf who imprinted. He hadn’t really done that with Jacob, since they hadn’t even been in the same pack when it happened, but now that it matured, he probably had questions.

“Phase,” he said suddenly, not wanting to rehash the day’s events. He got up and took his shirt off and Sam followed as they turned their backs to one another. 

Both men phased after tying their clothes to their legs and started the run home. Jacob gave him the quick recap, including their conversation with Carlisle – much to Sam’s displeasure, to highlight the vamp’s point about him possibly being able to challenge the imprint. In the face of Nessie, it seemed difficult, but now that she wasn’t standing in front of him, his wolf shut up and his man suddenly, desperately wanted to go to the she-wolf immediately. 

So… you have a choice between them?

I don’t know… I was so sure before this that I could fight the imprint and be with her, but the romance is there with Ness, too. Out of all the outcomes, I didn’t think that… well, I would have feelings for them both. I considered when Nessie matured, the romantic factor not coming into play and being able to pick Leah, and I also considered Nessie overshadowing the feelings I had for Leah as Emily did for you, but for both to be so strong… I’m confused.

You and me both.

I’m a jerk.

You knew the imprint was, most likely, going to change – you got lucky, actually, that it seems you’re able to make the decision between them instead of it making it for you.

I don’t feel lucky. Either way I’m hurting someone. If I pick Leah, Renesmee is hurt, if I pick Renesmee… Either way, all three of us end up hurt.

Why do you say that?

If I’m with Renesmee, what does that mean long-term? Me phasing forever… being immortal? Realistically, even if we could have kids, we would be opening ourselves up to another volturi interference and god knows our… genetic make-up could be confusing at best. With her, as much as I care about her and love her, it wouldn’t be easy.

And with Leah it would be?

No, not a chance. Do you forget who you’re talking about? Sam chuckled and Jacob’s thoughts continued. But I don’t think that she’ll forgive me for not being able to close my heart entirely to the imprint. She saw my face back there when I first saw Renesmee… When she told me how she felt the other night… she said she would always be second best. I think you can appreciate how much that hurt to hear. Even if I can pick her, I’m not sure she deserves to feel that way forever and I don’t know how to make her not feel that with the imprint being a constant battle. 

Do you think that she’s second best?

What? Of course not. 

Then make her see that, if you decide to pursue Leah. How are the two different? They can’t both be as equally strong, right?

Renesmee is… well, it’s the imprint. It feels forced because of the imprint. You know how that is. With Leah… it’s so different.

Different?

I feel like… I’m home with her. I can be myself and I don’t have to walk on eggshells or worry about anything. It’s natural.

Who do you want to pursue?

Jacob felt his wolf jump and he fought back the urge to say Renesmee’s name. Instead, he brought one name to the forefront of his mind: Leah.

Sam was shocked. Being in Jacob’s mind allowed him to see his struggle at finding Leah’s name in the face of his imprint – but he had done it. Sam wished so many times when he first imprinted that he could do that – choose Leah, if only for their history and the easiness it would bring, especially when Emily forced him away, but he couldn’t. He could only see Emily. Jacob not only saw Leah, but his own freedom of choice silenced the imprint, because as soon as her name was there, his wolf shut up again and Jacob realized it, too.

Maybe Carlisle’s right. As… well, disturbing as your conversation was with him for all of us, maybe your bond with Leah can outrank the imprint – if you let it. 

How do I do that though? When Renesmee isn’t in front of me… well, it’s a lot easier to do what I want instead of what the imprint wants, but I’m afraid if I’m faced with her asking me to choose her, my wolf won’t let me tell her no. 

I think you already have.

What?

Earlier. You stalled. If Emily asked me what I wanted, I wouldn’t have even been able to hesitate. You did.

But what if I can’t do that again?

You can if you want to. Your wolf is pulled in two different directions, your Alpha female, or your Imprint, but the wolf aside, you want Leah, correct?

I think we could be happy together, if things were easier.

Well, your wolf is confused – clearly, and if you want Leah, make the part of your wolf who wants her stand out. 

How?

By telling Renesmee.

He hadn’t left Leah out of the equation earlier to be deceitful; he just was so caught off guard. If he told her about Leah, maybe they would have had an entirely different conversation. Maybe he should have. Maybe he should go back and tell her. If he faced her now, though, could he tell her what was really in his heart? Would the imprint allow it? Would Leah want him knowing how difficult the decision was, and how hard he would have to continue to fight for her in the face of his imprint? Would it be that way forever?

What do I tell Leah? I have to go see her, I can’t just… drop off the grid after today.

Be honest with her. If she can accept the imprints pull is there, but you’re choosing her, then maybe she’ll surprise you. 

She shouldn’t have to.

Love is messy sometimes.

Tell me about it. 

Sam didn’t know what else to say as they met the brush outside Jacob’s house. The day had grown dark, now, the sun setting over the trees and they both phased back and dressed. He wanted Leah to be happy, and although Jacob’s uncertainty terrified him, if he was willing to do what he, himself, couldn’t, and fight for Leah, there had to be some merit there, right?

Sam sighed, “You’ve got yourself into a tough situation, Jake. My choice… it was… well, easy. I don’t say that to diminish what an amazing woman Leah was and still is, or because I didn’t love her, but my imprint didn’t allow me to feel as strongly for anyone else as I did for Emily. But, well, Quil’s imprint is different, too.”

”What do you mean?”

”He told me earlier this week that he plans to stop phasing.”

Jacob’s brow furrowed, “I thought he was going to continue until Claire was older?”

”That’s going to be years, Jacob, unlike with Renesmee. He said he has chosen to be her big brother; her protector, but to take the non-romantic road. He can’t wait forever.”

”He always was intent to phase until she was old enough,” Jacob argued.

”He’s tired of waiting, Jake. He wants a normal life, can you blame him?”

Jacob shook his head, thinking back to how touchy Quil had been lately about his imprint – it made sense, now. “Well, I guess it’s nice to have someone who’s imprints just as fucked up as mine.”

”Imprint’s don’t have to be romantic. Is your mind made up? 100%?”

“I’m in love with her; Leah. I love Nessie, because of the imprint, but I’m in love with Leah. Our souls just… they match. But she probably hates me,” Jacob grumbled. “I practically fell to my knees the minute I saw Renesmee.”

”That’s the imprint,” Sam reminded him again. “It’s Leah’s choice on how to approach this and you can’t decide that for her. But can you really go to Leah right now and tell her all of this if Renesmee does want to act on it and, if when faced with that, your imprint changes?”

“When I was with her, I couldn’t stop thinking about Leah… I can’t see why Renesmee would want to keep things going if I tell her that. Renesmee deserves better.” He sighed, “Leah deserves better,” Jacob choked out. “She deserves-”

”You don’t have to tell me what she deserves,” Sam said firmly. “That woman… she deserves the world. You think I don’t see how amazing she is? I see it every time I see her… I just know I’ve loved Emily more since the second I laid eyes on her. Leah deserves someone willing to fight for her, and if you are, then make her see it. If not, you need to let her go.” 

“She’s not okay, is she?”

Sam may have exaggerated just how okay she was earlier. “She will be fine.”

”How bad?” Jacob persisted. 

Sam sighed, “She’s far from inconsolable; she’s just upset.”

”I need to talk to her-”

”No, you need to go home and figure your emotions out. You can’t walk up to her after she saw what she did and profess your feelings without being 100% sure. Talk to Renesmee first and really see if you can openly reject the imprint when faced with her, and how she reacts, then talk to Leah.”

“She’ll hate me if I don’t try to explain-“

”She’ll hate you even more if you say something that you don’t mean.”

Sam was right; he needed time. “Tomorrow,” he vowed. “I’ll see Renesmee, then talk to Leah.”

”If you need anything, you know where we are,” Sam said easily before turning.

Jacob stood there for what felt like forever. He knew Sam must be home by now, and he was about to take his advice and go himself, but he had to talk to Leah, even if it was a disaster. Taking it on good faith that she would still be at Sam and Emily’s, Jacob ran over there. 

When he got to the small house, he took a deep breath in and walked up, knocking on the door.

Rachel answered, and frowned when she saw Jacob. “It’s not a good time,” she said, stepping out onto the porch and closing the door behind her. 

“I have to talk to her.”

“I think she knows what you’re going to say, really, just-“

“No, I don’t think she does,” he argued. “Can you send her out, Rach, please?”

His sister looked conflicted but finally nodded. “Just for the record, I think this is a stupid idea. As usual.” She disappeared back inside, and Jacob turned, facing the road as he grabbed the railing with both hands. A minute later, he heard the door open, and close again and he turned to see the she wolf. Why did all their pivotal conversations happen on a balcony?

Jacob sighed, knowing how bad he looked right now but desperately needing her to try to understand his position. “Are you okay?”

“Fine,” she said firmly, jaw clenched, arms crossed. “Look, I’m sorry. I should have never told you how I felt. We can be friends, but right now I’d really like you to leave and give me some space for a little while.” He could see the bloodshot coloring of her eyes and he hated himself for being the cause of it. Her strong stance didn’t hide her emotions – she couldn’t hide from him, but she had her words carefully picked and rehearsed. 

”I don’t want to be friends, Leah, that’s the problem,” he cried, throwing his hands up in the air. “I want you; I love you, I -” The words just slipped out; and she looked at him like he just told her he hated her. He had been so careful not to return those three little words until the time was right, but he just blew it.

“How admirable,” Leah said through gritted teeth. “That you’d show up here confessing your undying love for me when you just sent me away and you smell like her. You’ve been gone for a while, did you tell her how much you love her, too?” Leah flashed back to their altercation months ago outside of Billy’s and knew just like then, they had an audience. The house behind them was quiet, no doubt waiting for her and Jacob go up in flames. Even picturing Jacob’s lips on Renesmee’s made her feel nauseous.

Ah, fuck. Cue him being a piece of shit. Maybe Sam was right, but he couldn’t go home without her knowing that he hadn’t written her off. Maybe he should have showered first, though. “Leah…”

“I’d rather not hear about your picture-perfect imprint – I saw it on your face already, so please leave. Don’t pretend like you don’t have feelings for her, too.”

“My feelings for you are what matter,” Jacob said, wishing she would just let him talk for a minute. With Leah in front of him, there was no confliction in who he wanted; her. His wolf was silenced again, and his inner man wanted to beg her to believe him; to trust him. Leah sat down on the small porch swing outside to put some more distance between them. 

“After you rolled around with her?” Leah asked curiously. He smelt like her too prominently to have just talked to her - she still had her wolf-sense of smell. She knew that he cared for Renesmee, and despite the notion that he still cared about her being shocking to her, she wasn’t about to play any games with him in the face of an imprint. She had been hoping the imprint would be unromantic once it matured and they could be together, but that clearly wasn’t the case.

Jacob reached up to rub the back of his neck and he averted his gaze. “It was just a kiss.”

Leah’s composure faltered knowing that Renesmee’s lips had been the last one’s on his – the ones she had made love to only hours prior, and Jacob immediately shut up seeing the transformation on her face even though she wouldn’t make eye contact with him. He noticed her hands in her lap, clenched tightly together and her locked jaw. She was desperately trying to keep her cool, but he knew her too well. 

“Hit me, yell at me, something-“

“It doesn’t matter,” Leah said suddenly, finally meeting his eyes. He could see the hurt in them, but she was trying to keep it out of her voice. 

“Of course it matters, Leah, I care about you, I mean that-“

“Just like Sam does, huh? Overcast by an imprint. Irrelevant. I told you, Jake, I don’t want to do this. It’s my fault for letting myself get this far in knowing the outcome. I’m so… angry, but it’s directed at myself, not you, so I really would rather you walk away right now before I take it out on you because I know it’s not your fault. This time, it’s mine for deluding myself into thinking that we were different.”

It’s not your fault.

The words surprised Jacob. It wasn’t Sam’s either, when he left her, but she blamed him and Emily so much for so long – and now he was getting off with it? She knew what to expect with him, he thought idly. This wasn’t a surprise. But, boy, he was about to surprise her.

“I want to be with you. I know I shouldn’t tell you that, and I know I’m complicated, and that this situation isn’t easy, but I came here to give you the decision tonight. My imprint is different. I care about her, the imprint doesn’t allow me not to, but it has no affect over how much I care about you. The balls in your court, Clearwater.”

She got up and went to face him, placing her hand on the railing beside him. A part of her wanted to jump for joy – he was picking her, but her jealousy reared its head and she kept seeing him kissing Renesmee rolling around in her mental images. Although he was telling her exactly what she wanted to hear, the words were tainted. She willed Sam to pick her so many times, but now faced with what she had wanted, coming from another man who she was in love with, she could see the truth: she didn’t want to be an option. She wanted to be everything; the way Jeremy had treated her. The only woman. “Do you love her?”

Jacob looked in her chocolate pools and gulped. Transparency would be the only way to make this work, if it was going to. “In a different way than I love you; like a protector. I’ll never not worry about her safety and if she’s happy – that’s the imprint, but I love you, too.”

“Do you kiss everyone you feel like you should protect?”

He faltered and took a deep breath, “It just happened, I’m sorry.”

Leah looked away. Her heart wanted to throw herself into his arms and kiss him – but her head and her pride won the inner battle. She met his eyes again and forced her next words, “I’m not second-best, Jake. Maybe in your pack I agreed to that, but I won’t agree to this. You promised you’d never treat me like that, so the answer is no. Please go home.” She turned on her heel before going back inside. 

She brushed everyone off with statements of her being okay until Jacob did leave and she walked home. 

”Leah?” Her mom came out of the kitchen as she got home. She felt numb; tired and drained.

”Yeah?”

”Are you okay?”

”Yeah, fine, what’re you doing here?”

Sue studied her before sighing, ”Charlie and I were hoping to have a family dinner with you guys in the next couple of weeks. I wanted to come by and ask-”

”Sounds good,” she said easily. “I’m really tired, though, so night, mom.”

”Goodnight, Leah.”


	14. Almost

Despite Jacob’s best efforts to talk to Leah over the next five days, she refused to see him. Seth had even sent him away. Renesmee, on the other hand, called him every day. He hadn’t gone over to see her since because he wasn’t sure what to say. He knew he had to tell Renesmee about Leah, and what he truly wanted, but he didn’t know how to make things right with the she-wolf despite his numerous attempts, so he decided to wait until Renesmee’s original ask of him to go over Sunday in hopes that he could reconcile with the she-wolf before then and have answers for Renesmee. Unfortunately, it was now Sunday at 7:30 PM. He had promised Renesmee that he would be there by 8 – and Leah still wouldn’t answer his calls. 

He took the long way to the Cullen’s on his bike, trying to figure out what he was going to say to Renesmee, but still had no idea by the time he got there. When he approached, he felt the emptiness of the main house. Hm, weird. He went back, to the small cottage, and walked in. “Ness?”

“In my room,” she called out.

Jacob went in and was hit with the fact that half of her room was in boxes. “What’s with all the cardboard? Are you redecorating again? Doesn’t Alice usually do that?”

She was in the middle of the floor dressed in a black robe, sorting through her clothes and putting them in respective boxes. She got up and walked over to her bed, sitting on it and patting the spot beside her for him. He sat by her and she smiled before her eyes grazed over the boxes scattered on her floor. “My family and I are leaving.”

“What? When?”

“Tomorrow.”

Suddenly, he was hit by a new wave of conflict.

“Why?”

She shrugged, “We’ve been here too long. Now that I’m finally old enough, we have to leave and start fresh somewhere else to avoid any speculation.”

“And you’re leaving tomorrow? That’s… well, soon, isn’t it?” He rubbed the back of his neck nervously, feeling his heart pounding in his chest.

“It’s easier this way,” she said softly. “Want to make my last night memorable?” Renesmee asked, pulling him from his dazed state.   
Suddenly, as Renesmee reached down and undid her robe, he realized what she was asking him. Something he dreamed of his entire life – to be with the woman that he was destined to be with. But the only thing flashing through his mind at that second, as she opened her robe, wasn’t the knee-highs she had on; it was the chocolate brown eyes and shorter hair of his most recent overnight - Leah. If he did this, he essentially was digging his own grave and packing it in - there was no going back. 

”You could always come with us,” she smiled at his reaction – shock, though it probably wasn’t entirely related to what she assumed. “If you want to, that is… then we can have a lot more nights like this. Aunt Alice said she could even get us our own place for a while.” Her parents hadn’t bee keen, but she was an adult now and she was ready to explore her and Jacob’s imprint.

“Ness…” Jacob forced himself to look away from her. 

“You don’t want to?” Renesmee asked softly, her sweet voice ringing through the small space. She was confident that she looked amazing in her attire and it was possible that he just needed a second to process that, right? “Everyone’s gone hunting. They won’t be home for another few hours…”

You don’t want to?

Leah said those exact words to him after the wedding; standing outside, leaning against his patio, looking at him under her thick, dark lashes as the rain fell on her copper skin. Jacob remembered thinking that the droplets of water on her skin made it look like she was glowing - radiant, though, that very well could have been the alcohol, too. He snapped back to the present and tried to formulate a response. 

“Nessie,” Jacob choked out. “It’s not that-“ The need to keep her happy overpowered him as her face fell, and he shook his head, trying to gulp back the lump in his throat. “It’s just… fast. You just hit me with the fact that you’re leaving, tomorrow, and then…”

“We can talk about that later,” she said finally. “I just… would like to have this with you. You’re my Jacob, right? I’m tired of being told to wait and that I’m not old enough - I am now, and I want to experience everything that life has to offer. You said you wanted romance, right?”

Why wasn’t this as easy as Sam walking away from Leah the moment that he met Emily? Why did Jacob want to fight for Leah in spite of his perfect match, standing before him, asking him to be with her in every way possible? Did he want to want to? Absolutely! But not at the cost of hurting Leah anymore. He had to really try to talk to the she wolf after Nessie left – and he was still unsure how he felt about that, but he wasn’t about to tell her that they had slept together, was he? Just knowing that he kissed Nessie had hurt her; this would be unforgivable. He had chosen Leah and he had finally had come to peace with knowing that he wanted Leah in his future – a future that he was excited about fighting for even against her apprehension, and now this.

His wolf inside him had suddenly come back to life, screaming at him to go to Renesmee and kiss her and satisfy whatever need she had, but the man in him wanted him to leave right then and there, away from the temptation, and right back to Leah’s side to tell her that he wouldn’t stop fighting for her. His inner man won out the night of Sam and Emily’s wedding, but he was unsure what was going to prevail tonight, and it made him feel sick. This was exactly what Sam had warned him about. Could he really push the imprint away for Leah if Renesmee was fighting for it? He was about to see, one way or another.

Jacob got up and paced the small room for a moment, just as Renesmee got up and walked over to him, taking his hand. Her robe was still open, highlighting every amazing curve she had, and he looked away again, knowing he should leave right now before the imprint took control entirely. Renesmee leaned up on her tip toes to press her lips to Jacob’s and as they touched, he thought that maybe it was only her; maybe despite his attraction to Leah, he still wanted to be with Nessie. Maybe he wasn’t as sure as he thought he was. How could he be sure when Renesmee was fighting for his attention in such little clothing? Clothing his wolf wanted to rip off her. The admission surprised him.

His wolf fueled his inner fire and he kissed her back, despite the uneasy feeling he had in his gut. He tried to push it away and tell himself this was what was meant for him – they knew this would happen and besides, Leah didn’t want him - but, despite their kissing increasing in passion, he couldn’t rid the feeling and he subconsciously knew that Leah did want him, she was just hurt and pushing him away right now. Even as his body responded to her, he knew that he was betraying another part of himself; a big, opinionated part.

But, she was a beautiful woman – her long, auburn hair curled at the bottom, her perfectly rounded hips and chiseled body was unworldly to him; supernatural. Nessie was tall, only a few inches shorter than him, with a full chest, tapered waist, and long, muscular legs. She was perfect and his body responded to that. 

As his hands gently grazed the curve of her hip, he felt like it should have been Leah’s, though, and he subconsciously knew that it wasn’t. It was impossible to fight this moment, though, as Nessie started pulling at his t-shirt. He realized he didn’t want to fight it – his wolf was happy, and he tried desperately to silence his inner man and channel any rogue feelings into those of lust. 

Jacob’s shirt hit the floor, and he hoped that Renesmee was right when she said that her parents were far away enough that he wouldn’t be strangled. How far did Edward’s mind reading really extend? Renesmee reached to her shoulders, pushing her robe off and letting it fall to the floor so that he could take in the little ensemble she had on underneath – black thigh-highs, a black lace push-up bra, and a black, satin thong. Jacob felt all the air leave the room, and she smiled happily at his reaction. “Do you like it?” She asked softly, looking up at him under her thick lashes.

He was entranced. “I love it,” he stumbled backwards, feeling the back of his legs hit her bed and he spun them around so that she fell back onto her back, onto the luxury comforter. He climbed on top of her and let his hands wander, trying to keep the woman back on the reservation who taught him everything he knew out of his mind the entire time as Renesmee’s fingertips gazed the muscles on his bare chest. He remembered how Leah’s fingers made his skin feel like it was on fire back in the clearing, and the imprint desperately tried to push the thought away and focus entirely on the woman beneath him. 

A sudden realization crashed down on him as she played nervously with the waist of his jeans. “Renesmee,” he pulled back from kissing her, their bodies tight together, his member pressing against his jeans, asking to be freed. “A condom.” He didn’t know how this thing worked, and he wasn’t taking any chances. 

Renesmee nodded, her cheeks flushing. “I’ve got it covered, in the drawer.”

“How did you…?”

She smiled softly, “Uncle Emmett - don’t worry, he promised he wouldn’t say anything.”

He wasn’t much older than Renesmee looked, but there was something a little too innocent about her answer. Leah was older; mature and wise. She wouldn’t worry about her mom coming home (much) or asking someone for condoms. Her maturity against Renesmee’s made the pit in his gut grow even more. He shouldn’t be doing this – not when he was so conflicted. Not when he couldn’t stop thinking about Leah. He had to choose, and this was his moment to do it because after they did this, there was no chance Leah would ever take him back – and if they didn’t do this, he knew that Renesmee would understand the rejection.

Renesmee didn’t want to talk anymore, so she leaned back up to kiss him. “Make love to me,” she whispered.

The words were too binding; Jacob’s inner wolf couldn’t deny a task asked by her, even this. 

Sam’s words came back to his mind: That’s the imprint.

This was the imprint laying on top of her – not him, but he felt like he didn’t have a choice here; not with her uttering those words and his wolf wanting to go to Hell and back to satisfy her every request. Jacob mechanically reached behind her back as their kissing intensified again and he carefully undid the clasp of her bra, which brought back the immediate memory of him struggling with Leah’s the first time they were together in his garage and her telling him he was going to have to figure it out one day. Then, again, in his car when she went bra-less to avoid the hassle of him fumbling with the clasps. He had already ripped one bra apart at that point, after all, and she hadn’t been too happy about it. Apparently, those things were expensive, and it was hard to find one that ‘fit perfectly’, whatever that meant. He had figured it out, now, though, and the memories that went along with his clever fingers were sobering. 

Jacob got off her immediately and rolled to the side, throwing his legs over the side of the bed to sit up and put more distance between them. He couldn’t do this – it wasn’t fair to either girl and he felt his wolf shut up as soon as he had made the decision and their bodies parted. He had come here to tell Renesmee about his feelings for Leah, and now he had to, despite his distraction earlier.

“Jacob?” Renesmee asked, holding her bra to her as she rolled onto her side to study him. “If you don’t want to…” He did, though; with his lower half pressed tightly against her moments ago, she had felt that he wanted her, so what was wrong?

Jacob couldn’t look at her; not without seeing brown hair and eyes and he shook his head, closing his eyes, resting his elbows on his knees and his head in his heads. “I can’t do this, Nessie.” 

Renesmee caught onto his train of thought quickly. “You… you don’t want this? Me? Us?”

“It’s complicated,” he sighed.

Intimacy was a new experience for her, and she was grasping at straws to figure it out without seeming inexperienced in relation to him, but she felt like she was failing miserably. Her confidence was quickly dwindling. This wasn’t going how she expected. She had been told how amazing she was for as long as she could remember, and she thought that would easily translate into Jacob wanting this with her. At least for one night, if not forever. After all, he said imprinting traditionally led to this – to marriage and love. So why did their relationship lack that now that she was old enough to enjoy it with him?

Jacob immediately grabbed his shirt, pulling it on before handing her robe back to her. “Get dressed. We need to talk.”

Renesmee frowned, her cheeks flushing, and she threw the robe over her shoulders again, knotting the belt as she scooted to the edge of the bed, beside him, and crossed her legs. “What did I do wrong?”

Jacob’s heart broke at her words and he turned to face her, taking her hands in his. “You did nothing wrong. This was… hot as Hell, Ness. You’re incredible, but I have to tell you something. Something I should have told you last week, or at least before… well, that happened,” he nodded toward the crumpled comforter. 

“Does it have to do with Leah?” Jacob’s shock was clear, and Renesmee sighed. “My dad told me that you… well, have something special with her. I thought special may mean… well, romantic, but I didn’t think that it could compare to an imprint. I figured it we did this tonight, then you wouldn’t have anything special with her anymore; just me.” 

Jacob sighed, closing his eyes and averting his gaze. She was much smarter than he gave her credit for, but still inept at romantic and sexual matters, not that he could blame her. “It… doesn’t work quite like that. What did he tell you exactly? About Leah and I?”

“Just that, but I’d really like for you to tell me the rest.”

“I don’t know where to start.”

“From the beginning?”

He hesitated, but nodded. He started with telling her about his prior strained relationship with the she-wolf, then told her about Leah joining his pack, and when he got to the wedding, he hesitated. “Sam and Emily’s wedding… was a hard day for her. We were having fun, dancing and drinking, and afterwards she was upset, so I went to walk her home. We ended up…”

Renesmee had listened quietly the entire time, and she frowned when he trailed off. “Having sex?” The word felt so dirty coming out of her beautiful, innocent mouth and Jacob realized, imprint aside, they really had nothing else in common. It hurt his wolf to consider, but well, his man ached for the connection he had with Leah and he felt extremely guilty for his actions tonight already, and knew his conversation with the she-wolf after this would be difficult, but he wanted her by his side – he needed her. He felt whole with her and they understood each other better than he and Renesmee ever really could.

“Yeah, and after that, her and I decided to be friends with benefits. It’s when there’s no real relationship, per say, but you’re… well…”

“Having sex,” she supplied again. 

“Yeah,” he choked out. “That went on for a while, and in the midst, feelings became involved.”

“For the both of you?”

Jacob hesitated before nodding. She took a deep breath and frowned, taking her hands back from being clasped in Jacob’s.

“Do you love her?” Renesmee’s words echoed Leah’s prior ones again and he nodded, exhaling slowly. “Differently than you love me?”

“I do love you,” he admitted. “But I’m in love with Leah. Maybe if Leah hadn’t of been involved with me prior to now things would be different, but I just… I can’t do this with you when my heart isn’t completely here.” 

The words were surprisingly easy to say, and once more, his wolf stayed quiet, letting him voice what he wanted. His wolf was giving him emotional whiplash but at least now it was finally fucking silent again rather than pushing him toward sleeping with Renesmee. He thought back to the situation Leah had been in with Jeremy – she thought that they could be happy, entirely and completely, if not for being involved with him and now, he understood. 

Maybe things would be different right now if he hadn’t had gotten involved with Leah at all, but he couldn’t bring himself to regret that decision, even in this moment. He had watched Leah change the past few months and he had to admit, the once somber female that everyone dreaded being around made him very happy. He felt so accomplished every time that he made her smile and he felt that real, unedited and natural kind of love that he once felt for Bella.

“So you’re not coming with us I assume?” She tried to hide the hurt in her voice, but Jacob heard it.

“La Push is my home,” he whispered.

“With Leah?”

“Leah and I have a lot to talk about, but yeah, I hope so; eventually.”

“If she loves you, she’ll come around.”

Jacob nodded hesitantly. “You don’t know Leah; she’s the most infuriating woman I’ve ever met.” And beautiful and sexy and difficult.

Nessie smiled softly. “I’ve never really seen you back down from a challenge, Jake.”

He chuckled. “You don’t know Leah.” 

“She seems nice. I mean... not really to me, but I kind of understand why. But she makes you happy, right?”

“It feels natural,” he admitted. “It’s like... breathing with her.” He remembered telling Bella how easy it could have been with him using those words and he never thought the shewolf back on the reservation would ever be the one his soul found true solace with. 

“I don’t understand, though. If you don’t want me, why are things complicated with her? You said you both love each other; you’ve slept together.”

“Because she knows I care about you, too.”

“But you just told me you love her more; you’re in love with her.” 

Jacob hesitated, not sure how to explain this to her. “Yes, but if I told you I loved you, and wanted to be with you, but a part of me would always care about someone else, because of an imprint, how would you feel?”

Renesmee contemplated this for a long moment before frowning, “She’s jealous of our imprint?”

“I don’t think jealous is the right word,” though, it was a fair point and he was sure there was some jealousy there, too. “I think she’s scared to get involved with me knowing the imprint is involved because she doesn’t want to get hurt.”

“I love you,” she said easily, the words rolling off her tongue. “Enough that I won’t force the imprint on you. You should… you should be with Leah, if that’s who you want. You don’t have to change to be with her.” The words hurt her chest, but she knew it was the right thing to do. 

“I do,” he sighed. “Because I have to fight this imprint to be with her and I think we’re both scared that I won’t be able to.”

“You just did,” she said simply.

He looked into her beautiful eyes and sighed, “I’m so sorry I let this happen, Nessie. I know I told you that we would be together… Traditionally, that is what happens. I didn’t mean to deceive you. Leah being a wolf and us getting involved… well, it changed things more than I could have imagined.”

“It’s okay,” she said gently, reaching out to touch his cheek and show him how many good moments she had with him before letting her hand fall. “We’re always going to be close; the imprint needs that, but as much as it hurts,” she blinked back dampness accumulating in her eyes. “I want you to be happy. You’re right. You belong here. My mom told me that you never wanted her to ‘throw her humanity away’,” she quoted their conversation earlier. “How you tried to protect her and keep her safe.”

“Why did she tell you that?”

“She told me that I should give you the option to come with us or not – not just ask you to. When I asked her why, she told me how she had a choice in how her life played out and that you should, too, because if we did decide to be together, it wouldn’t be easy. I would have to ask you to keep phasing forever to be with me and she said how you never wanted immortality before the imprint. She also mentioned children, but I never really thought that far ahead. I assume you want a family someday, though. Who knows what that looks like between us? I wanted to… well, fight the odds and make it work with you, if you wanted that, but I appreciate your honesty with me about Leah.”   
She wanted him to want her, naturally, but she wasn’t going to force him into something he didn’t want – or that he was unsure about. That wasn’t fair to him, but also not to herself, or Leah - she actually liked the she wolf, despite her unpleasant demeanor at times. Her Aunt Rosalie had told her enough about Leah’s past to decide that she would probably be unpleasant at times, too, if she were her and she loved Jacob so much and would never want him to be unhappy. Every woman wanted to be chosen, not forced into something that wasn’t reciprocated, as much as it hurt.

Jacob wasn’t really sure what to say; Nessie was giving him permission to walk away. Did he really get to do that? Just… walk away? Would it be a clean break, or would he end up in compromising positions every time he was with her, regardless? He wasn’t sure, but right now, with his wolf silenced, he felt like he could do it; he wanted to.

“You need to figure out you and Leah,” she said softly. “And I need to figure out how to... well, be this; live and explore things. As much as I hate being away from you, I can’t ask you to be someone you’re not for me. I love you too much to let you throw away your humanity. I just... wish things were different,” she said honestly, choking down the lump in her throat. “I hadn’t expected it to be this hard...” 

“I’m sorry,” he said again, feeling as though he couldn’t apologize enough. As a tear fell from her eye, he reached up and brushed it off her cheek. “You deserve someone who is all in,” he said levelly. “Someone who only thinks about and loves you. You’ll find it, I know you will, and I’m very sorry that it wasn’t me.”

“Me too,” she sighed as another tear fell, “But I guess we’re just not meant to be. I’ll be in touch all the time,” she said softly. “I promise. And we’ll visit. But I want you to explore your own happiness here. Leah deserves to feel that, too - someone who’s all-in. So, show her that you are.”

“Leah feels like… home,” he said, remembering his words to Sam. 

She nodded. “Well make her see that. Tell her that I’m sorry that our imprint has caused so many issues and that I don’t intend for it to continue causing problems in the future.”

He reached over to hug her tightly, as more tears fell from her eyes and he kissed her cheek when he pulled back. “You’re an incredible woman.”

“Will you be by between now and when I leave?” She asked innocently. 

“I think it’s best if we say goodbye now,” his chest felt crushed by the words. “I don’t think I should go around your dad quite yet.” 

His head wasn’t clear enough and the desire inside him kept picturing those knee-highs. Despite the gimmicks being incredibly sexy, he realized Leah was sexy as just herself – she didn’t need lingerie to call to his every need, though admittedly, if he could fix things between them, he may need to stop by a Victoria’s Secret to find something for her to wear next time they were together, because damn, it would look great on her. Maybe something white, to contrast her tanned skin. No, that was too angelic. Red. Red was perfect.

Nessie understood and reached over, hugging him tightly again. “I love you, Jacob.” Pulling back, she met his humbling gaze. “If things were different and I wasn’t immortal and you weren’t a wolf sworn to protect La Push, well, maybe we would have had a better chance.”

Despite the sadness Jacob felt at her words, he smiled at the sobering reality of them. “Yes, maybe if we both we’re supernatural creatures,” he agreed teasingly. He cupped her cheek in his hands. “Thank you for… for giving me the choice.”

She nodded, looking at him under her lashes. “This isn’t goodbye,” she said suddenly. “We’re going to be back to visit - a lot, to satisfy the imprint’s pull, so don’t think you’re getting rid of me just yet.” She got up off the bed and went behind the divider in her room to change into some actual clothes. 

“Will I always want to be close to you when I come back? Even if we’re with other people? Being near you soothes me.”

Jacob sighed, “I don’t know, it’s still complicated. I’m going to assume yes – that’s the imprint.” It would physically pain him to be away from her, there was no denying that. “When do you think you’ll be back to visit?”

Renesmee came back out, fully clothed now, and shrugged. “A couple of months when we get settled, probably. I’m sure mom will be back to see Charlie by then.”

He nodded, feeling his wolf sigh at the months ahead. “Well I guess I better go. I’ve got some major damage control to do with Leah and I think it’s best if we… well, both cool off a little from earlier. I’d rather not be here when your parents get home.” She nodded and he stood up before her. “Take care of yourself and be careful. Oh - and hide those condom’s well because if your dad finds them, I’ll be dead.”

Renesmee giggled and pulled back, kissing his cheek on her tip-toes. “I will. Follow your heart, Jacob. If that’s Leah, make her see that, okay?”

Jacob nodded, still unsure what exactly to do with Leah. They had so much history and things were still complicated. As easy as it was being with Leah in relation to Renesmee in a situational sense, it was still hard to give himself entirely to anyone with the imprint always looming. There would always be a special woman in his life – Renesmee and he didn’t know how Leah would handle that. She had been second best for so long, and he understood her need to be the only girl in the room. She deserved that and he wanted to figure out how to make her see that she wasn’t second best for him – he would do whatever it took. He walked away tonight - but this was only the beginning of the life-long struggle if they chose to really try to try any semblance of a relationship together. “I’ll do my best.”

Jacob pushed his boots back onto his feet and grabbed the keys to his bike and they said goodbye one last time as he walked out the cabin’s doors and drove back to the reservation.

As much as he wanted to go see Leah, he couldn’t. Not yet. Not when his head was still so unclear, his body was still tormented from the temptation of Nessie, and he smelled exactly like her. He wasn’t making that mistake again.

Jacob went home, ignoring the questions that his dad was asking about where he was, and jumped in the shower immediately. He made sure to scrub Nessie off him before throwing on fresh clothes and leaving the house again. He didn’t know what he was doing, but his feet took him right to the Clearwater’s house. He knocked and Seth let him in, telling him Leah was upstairs in her room.

Leah was on her bed, face into a book when he entered.

She sighed seeing him and she put her book down on the bed beside her. “I told Seth not to let you in.”

“Well it’s a good thing that he didn’t listen this time,” Jacob said effortlessly. “We need to talk.”

“I’m so sick of that line.”

Jacob went over, sitting next to her on her bed. “I want this; I want us. I’ve never been surer of anything, ever. Please, Leah, let’s work through this-“

“There is no us,” Leah said fiercely, turning toward him. “There never was, Jake. Not really.”

“We both know that’s not true.”

Leah laughed, but it lacked mirth. 

“Nessie is leaving in the morning,” he said firmly. “The Cullen’s and her need to relocate to fit in. I told her I won’t be going with her.”

Leah’s brow furrowed, “Why?”

“Because I belong here.”

“What about the imprint?”

Jacob reached over to take her hands in his and he was pleasantly surprised when she let him - probably just because his words had surprised her enough for her guard to come down a little. “We’re not acting on it. We’ll both visit to satisfy the pull, but we won’t be exploring a romantic connection moving forward.”

She was clearly confused, and sighed, “I don’t know what to say.”

“I do. I told her my heart was somewhere else. She said she wouldn’t make me change to be with her – that she wanted me to have the choice and be happy. Renesmee’s letting me go.” It was what she wanted to hear, but there was something about the way that he said it that didn’t sit well with her. She sighed, and Jacob saw her confliction. “What are you thinking?”

“So… Nessie is leaving in the morning… but, just because she’s leaving doesn’t mean I’m willing to be your consolation prize.”

“You’re not a consolation prize – you’re who I want to be with. She wanted to try things with us, and I told her I couldn’t because my heart belonged to someone else. What else can I do to prove that to you?”

Leah met his gaze and Jacob took in the beauty behind her deep chocolate eyes and how even with her defensive body language, no woman turned him on more than her. When Leah didn’t respond, Jacob felt his heart clench because he knew that the honesty that he was about to spout to Leah would hurt her, and probably kill any chance he had left, but he had no choice but to be honest if they were going to make this work. 

He had to tell her; utter the words that he didn’t want to say, and he forced them out of his mouth. “She asked me to sleep with her.” Leah’s calm, but confused features immediately transformed to both anger and pain and Jacob felt his heart crush in his chest. “But I didn’t – I stopped it, because I don’t want her like that, I want –“

“Don’t,” Leah said firmly. He saw her eyes fill with tears and he knew that he would feel better if she had hit him or yelled as opposed to cried. But right now, his emotions didn’t matter - only hers did. He had screwed up, and he had to own that and beg her forgiveness. “Don’t say it. I don’t want to hear it. I could accept that you were going to leave when she got older and the imprint changed into something romantic. Even if you chose to go around the world with her, whatever. It would have sucked, but I would have understood. But don’t sit there and tell me when your dick was almost in her that you chose me or want me or love me. It’s disgusting and pathetic.” She was trying to keep a fierce note to her voice, but her sadness was overwhelming.

She remembered how easy it was before Renesmee matured; how they had actually talked about going on a real date and being together exclusively, and she wished for it back so badly, even if they hadn’t known what the future held. They did, now, and it sucked. It was easier to lie to herself and be naive than it was to face the somber truth of Jacob loving two women. Ignorance was bliss, after all.

She looked away from him, blinking back the tears brimming her eyes and Jacob felt void of all emotion. But he wasn’t letting her push him away. He didn’t care how hard this would be. He reached out to touch her shoulder and she shrugged him off. “Let me make all of this up to you. I’ll do whatever you need. I want to be with you. My judgement… it lapsed earlier. I should have told Renesmee that I wasn’t interested right away, but the imprint’s pull-“

“Don’t talk to me about the imprint,” Leah cried, looking back to him as a rogue tear slipped down her cheek. “I know all about it your stupid imprint. If we’re together and she comes back in what, a years’ time, and wants to fuck you, what then? Can you just blame it on the imprint and that’s that?”

“I didn’t sleep with her,” he said strongly. 

“Why not?”

“I told you-“

“No, you said you almost did; that you stopped it. Why did the sobering realization of your feelings come into fruition right before you ended up in bed with her?” Jacob hesitated, seeing more tears flow down her cheeks. When he didn’t answer, she sighed. “Just tell me, Jacob.”

He dropped her gaze and looked down, taking in the floral pattern of her bedspread. The one they had slept in so many times – where he held her, kissed her, and made love to her even if they didn’t realize that’s what they were doing at the time. “I went to undo her bra. All I could think about was the night in the garage… and the car…”

Leah felt sick. She turned away from him, looking out the window into the darkness, trying to stop herself from allowing anymore tears to fall over him, but her heart was breaking. She didn’t respond; her mind pictured him and her in bed together, him on top of her, tangled in the sheets, making the small, sweet sounds that he evoked from her come out of another woman’s lips.

“Say something, please,” he whispered.

“I hate you,” she said finally, meeting his gaze, eyes clouded with more tears, jaw clenched. “I hate you so fucking much.”  
If she said anything else to him, he was sure it would have hurt less, but he knew she was mad and Leah Clearwater’s anger wasn’t something to play with and he deserved her scorn right now. 

“I’m sorry, Leah, I hate myself too for letting tonight get even remotely…” He didn’t even know what to call it, but he felt tears in his eyes, too. “I will make it up to you, I swear. Please, just give me the chance to show you how sorry I am. I’ll never hurt you again, I promise. I’ll fight for you and be the man you deserve. I love you. I’m in love with you. I know that, you know that, and Renesmee knows that now. I want you.”

”How can I trust you when you keep breaking my heart?” she choked out, emotion raw in her voice as she avoided his gaze.

He was wrong; that was the worst thing she could have said to him. Jacob reached over and pulled her into his chest as soon as her tears started flowing down her cheeks more heavily. She hit him away and squirmed in his arms, but he didn’t let go. He was speechless - his own heart breaking at the thought of hurting her. Again. He was no better than Sam, no matter how hard he had tried to be different. 

She buried her face into his chest and stopped fighting him, letting him hold her and console her. Her chest was tight, body shaking, eyes wet, and head pounding, but she still felt safe in Jacob’s arms. She knew he was being honest and when she felt dampness falling from his eyes, too, she knew he was a victim to the imprint tonight. But she couldn’t make him feel better about it; not when she refused to be a victim of his imprint, too. They wouldn’t be together, of that she was sure, but she let the familiar smell of soap and sweat mixed on his skin enter her nostrils, melting into his embrace, hoping that someday, she would feel more than a broken heart in the face of love. She felt him rub his hands up and down her back and heard his heavy breathing attempting to regulate.

I love you. I’m in love with you. I want you.

The words replayed on a permanent loop and she wanted so badly to be able to fall into his soothing words, but she couldn’t allow herself to let her guard down; let her heart control her actions. 

She remembered Sam’s words, outside of the wedding.

I will always love you.

At the time, it seemed like those five words would be forever ingrained on her mind, but now, she had Jacob’s words saving over them; a fresh heartbreak. Unfortunately, men’s love for her seemed to always pale in comparison to something else - something better, whether they wanted it to or not. Maybe she was just destined to be alone - forever unable to love a man who truly cared for her, like Jeremy, and always stuck caring for men who were ill-suited for her. Or, maybe, she was just wallowing in a dark hole of her own self-pity, but it seemed acceptable right now. After all, she knew from the beginning that Jacob and her couldn’t be long-term, but she pursued it anyways. 

It wasn’t fair to blame the hurt she was feeling now on him when she knowingly allowed this to happen, but after everything that happened with Renesmee, it was hard not to blame him for her new pain. Again, he had given her a false hope of an out. Questions swirled around her mind, but none had answers and she wasn’t sure how much time had passed before her eyes dried. Jacob continued to hold her tightly to him, as though his tight grasp would turn back time, and Leah had never felt more conflicted before in her life. His arms were warm, and she could hear his heart beating hard in his chest and was willing to bet he, too, wished that they could go back to the way they were, but could she forgive him? 

It would be so easy to push Jacob away, despite her feelings. Easier than standing beside him and trying to make this work. But was it worth it? If it worked, absolutely, but if not? She was the idiotic girl who believed in something unobtainable. Was it better to be hopeful and take a leap of faith even if it didn’t turn out the way you wanted it to, or, give up hope and refuse to be disappointed? Was love enough?

She pulled away from Jacob and saw him, too, wipe his cheeks dry and she gulped before meeting his eyes. “I don’t know what to say. I’m so confused right now.”

Jacob frowned and nodded, “I understand.”

Silence fell between them and he sighed. “Can I stay the night? Just… be here with you?”

She knew it was wrong, but nodded anyways and laid back on her bed. Jacob followed suit and pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her as she rested her head on his chest. Jacob reached down and draped a blanket over their bodies. He smelled like him - no trace of vamp, but the mental images kept coming. She wished for sleep to overtake her but it was a long time coming. 

Leah wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, but suddenly, it was morning and she felt the darkness of the night dissipate, light filling her bedroom. She blinked a couple of times to adjust to the light and stretched. Jacob’s arms were still around her and he was sound asleep. She felt everything from the night before coming back to her – the vision of him in Renesmee’s bed, him holding her, and the pain that she still felt in her chest. He looked so innocent, but she kept picturing things that made her feel nauseous. Although she slept for almost eight hours, she was still exhausted but hauled herself out of bed, managing to get up without waking him, before looking at the clock: 8 AM.

Hoping Emily was awake, Leah slipped out of the house unnoticed after running her fingers through her hair and grabbing her coat. She needed the only impartial opinion she was going to get. Unfortunately, she ran right into Renesmee at her doorstep, smelling her before the door even fully opened.

“Leah,” Renesmee said softly, dropping the hand that was just about to knock on her door. “I… I wanted to talk to you before my family and I left.”

Leah didn’t see anyone with her and assumed Nessie came alone, but even looking at how her hair hung perfectly in loose waves, her tight black jeans hugging her hips sensually, and her long-sleeve shirt with it’s deep-v, Leah felt surprisingly inadequate. Fuck Jacob Black. “I’m just leaving,” she said, pushing past Nessie and closing the door behind her as she stalked away from the house.

“Please,” Renesmee said again. “Just give me one minute.”

Leah stopped in her tracks, ready to tell Renesmee that she had much better uses of her time, but she stopped when she saw tears in the younger girl’s eyes. “What do you want?”

“Jacob loves you, honestly, forgive him,” she said softly, knowing he probably went to her after last night and even if he hadn’t, he still had a lot to be forgiven for considering Jacob said they weren’t on the best of terms. “I will stay out of your way, I promise. I want him to be happy. He deserves to be happy, but… I’m aware that it isn’t going to be with me.” Her voice broke and she hardly realized she was rambling.

Leah sighed. This day was starting out just great. Her next words were forced, but also a test to Nessie’s intentions. “You should just accept the imprint – tell him to go with you.”

“That isn’t what he wants.”

“According to him in your bed last night it isn’t not what he wants, either.” The words were like venom, but she couldn’t help it.

Renesmee flinched, “That was my fault. I thought… well, that maybe if we had last night together then I would change his mind; that he would see that he loved me, too, but it-“

“I really don’t want to hear about your night any more than I already have,” Leah said, crossing her arms. “Renesmee, why are you here?”

She squirmed under Leah’s piercing gaze and frowned, “To tell you myself that I’m letting Jacob go. I didn’t even have to. He was never mine. He never loved me like he loves you.”

Well, funny, considering she thought the same thing.

“You’re delusional.”

“He never wanted me last night; not really. He wants you. He loves you.”

“And that’s why you spread your legs for him, and he barely managed to deny you, right?” It was unfair to take her anger out on Renesmee. Really, she was still for most intensive purposes, a child, but she couldn’t help it. When Renesmee flinched, she could tell she was awkward with the topic of intimacy, but it hadn’t stopped her from almost sleeping with Jacob the night before, so it was time for her to be a big girl and own up to her actions.

“It wasn’t me he had trouble denying. Every time he looked at me, I could tell he wasn’t fully invested. I just… wanted my first time to be with someone special and Jacob is special to me. But it was wrong of me. The imprint fueled his actions last night, thanks to me, but I promise that I will never allow the imprint to get in the way of his happiness. You’re the one he’s happy with. He told me you feel like home. I’m new to all of this, but I feel like there aren’t many people in the world that can make someone feel that way. Forgive him, and me, please. I’m leaving shortly, and I promise to only be involved with him inasmuch as I have to be to satisfy the imprint – nothing more, nothing romantic.”

Leah was a little confused at how to respond. “Why are you telling me this?”

“Because love shouldn’t be forced.” Renesmee stepped forward and gave Leah a sad smile. “He isn’t mine – maybe you don’t want him to be yours, either, and if that’s what you decide, then that’s your choice, but I just wanted you to know that I am removing myself from any romantic connection to him and I won’t change my mind on that. Whether you accept his love or not is up to you, but I know without a doubt that he does love you. Even Uncle Jasper can sense your connection. He says it’s natural – pure.” Renesmee knew Leah didn’t have anymore words for her, so she gave her a small, sad smile before walking off into the woods and running off.

This day just kept getting weirder and weirder.

Leah felt a headache coming on and she sighed before walking the short distance to Emily’s, feeling a sudden back ache mirroring her now throbbing skull. She probably slept weird. She knocked on the door when she got there, hoping that Emily was awake. Sam answered, though, in his robe. “Hey Leah, what’s up?”

“Hey, is Emily up? I know it’s early, but-”

“In here,” Emily called. Sam stepped aside and ushered her inside.

“Do you want some breakfast? Coffee?”

“I’m good, thanks though.” She was still getting used to her new appetite but honestly? She was more nauseous than hungry this morning. With everything going on, it didn’t surprise her. Before phasing, she had always had trouble eating when she was upset.

She turned, following where she heard Emily’s voice into the living room and Sam went back to the kitchen with his newspaper. “Leah,” Emily said happily, resting a bowl of cereal on her belly, straining her neck to see her. Leah sat in front of her in the free armchair. “You’re up early. What’s wrong?” She saw the dark circles under her friend’s eyes and the exhaustion displayed on her features.

Leah sighed, “I need advice, Em.” She spilled her guts, and Emily listened quietly. She knew Sam could hear, too, but he stayed in the kitchen and gave them space. When she finished, she felt her eyes burning with unshed tears. “What do I do?” Her words were no more than a whisper. 

“I can’t tell you what to do,” Emily said gently; motherly. “Do you love him?”

“You know that I do.”

She moved over and patted the spot beside her on the couch. Leah went over and sighed, falling onto the sofa. Emily squeezed her hand tightly, “And everyone knows that he loves you, too.”

“He loves her, too, though,” she said bitterly.

“But he chose you.”

“But can he keep choosing me?”

Sam came in the living room then and he frowned, sitting in the armchair, facing the two girls. “Can I interrupt?” Leah turned to him and nodded, trying to blink back unshed tears even though she felt as though there was no liquid left in her body after last night, and he continued. “I’ve been in Jake’s head since everything happened with Renesmee. Have you?” She shook her head. “His imprint is different; I can vouch for that. You know how Carlisle said your love can possibly challenge an imprint-“

”Does the whole pack know about what Carlisle said!?” Surely if they did, she would have heard about it, regardless of her phasing, right? They hadn’t exactly had a chance to sit down with everyone and tell them like Jacob wanted to do - thankfully, for her own pride.

Sam shook his head, clearly uncomfortable with the topic but wanting to help. “No, just me. He told me about it when I went to him the day Renesmee matured.”

Leah sighed, at least it wasn’t common knowledge yet that she wanted to jump Jacob because of an inner horny wolf. She really needed something better to compare it to… something more humanizing. She didn’t want to think of that right now, though. “I don’t want to have to challenge the imprint, I just… want it to be easy.”

“Give him a chance. Renesmee’s told you herself that she won’t change her mind. I know you’ve been burned a lot before, but if there’s merit to your feelings for one another, and Carlisle’s speculation, and what we all see, it’s that there’s something there to fight for. Renesmee is gone now, right?”

The words surprised her, and her brow furrowed. She honestly expected Sam to be angry at Jacob for hurting her the night before, not understanding, but she was glad for his maturity. “Yes, but what happens if it’s not possible forever? What if he… I don’t know, misses her and realizes that he can’t fight the imprint anymore?”

“I think Jacob’s made his decision,” Sam said levelly. “And I think is wolf is at peace with it… and I think if Carlisle’s onto something, that speaks legions. Plus, he wouldn’t have been able to let her leave if the imprint was controlling him.”

The words didn’t sit well, because they were full of something she had since squashed again: Hope.

Emily hesitated, but decided to take an alternate approach. “If Sam had of told you about the imprint, but said he was choosing you, what would you have done?”

The question killed Emily to say, and Leah’s surprise at her words registered on her face and she hesitated. “That’s not comparable, we had history-“

“And you and Jacob don’t?”

“Well, yes, but-“

“But nothing. You would have fought our imprint to be with him, I know you. So, if you want to make this work with Jacob, try to trust him. Sam’s seen his thoughts, that’s true – he’s told me, too, that Jacob’s torn because he doesn’t love Renesmee like Sam loves me. Not when faced with his feelings for you, but he knows how difficult it is for you and wants to make it right.”

Sam added, ”I mean, I didn’t know about Renesmee last night, obviously, but I can say he’s probably pretty upset with himself about it, especially if he told you about it and went to you right away. You don’t have to forgive him if you don’t want to - but if you really love him and want a chance to be happy… well maybe last night was the ultimate test and Jacob passed. Maybe not with flying colors, but he did choose you in the face of his imprint.”

”I’m just so tired of being second-best,” she said, her voice defeated. “I don’t want to compete anymore with an imprint. I don’t want him to even have to consider what he wants; I want him to know and for it… well, not to be tainted.”

“If anything, it seems like Jacob is putting you first,” Sam said. “And knows what he wants.”

“Can you give us a second?” Emily asked her husband. “Alone?”

Sam nodded, but before he left, he glanced at his ex-girlfriend and frowned. “I want nothing more for you to be happy, Leah, and if Jacob hadn’t of shown me what he did, I’d be right there with you – scared of you getting hurt, but I think he’ll surprise you. I have faith in him, and your feelings for each other. I’ve seen the transformation since you’ve been with him, everyone has, and it’s been hard - but nice, to see you so happy with him. Try to follow your heart. Trust me, if he hurts you, I’ll make right on all of your father’s threats to me with him,” he said only half-teasingly. “Give him a chance to prove you wrong.” Sam left then and Leah felt her heart grow heavy at the mention of her father and the fact that a man she used to love so intensely and passionately was now simply a friend trying to give her advice. She had changed a lot, but he had, too. She sighed, turning back to Emily. 

When they were alone, hearing Sam having gone outside, Emily faced Leah and gave her a sad smile. 

“You’re not second best. Do you think Sam would have chose you if he could have? The answer is yes and despite my feelings on that, I’ve accepted it. I know what being second best is. It’s seeing Sam’s face every time you turn away from him and seeing the hurt in his eyes - it’s when him and Jacob fought over Jacob’s thoughts slipping at the whirlpools and him coming home, not wanting to face me because he was embarrassed that he couldn’t keep his cool when faced with you. It was watching you and Sam out on that balcony at our wedding and knowing as happy as he was with me, his heart was breaking. That’s second best, and I’ve accepted it. I’ll live with it, because I love him and I know he loves me - even though he loves you, too.”

Leah wasn’t sure what to say, but she felt a tear slip down her cheek that she hastily wiped away. “You’re married, with his baby-”

”And you really think that neither of us knows that it should have been you and him? That this was supposed to be your love story?”

”I don’t love him anymore,” she whispered. “Not like I used to.”

Emily sighed. “I know, but there will always be a piece of both of you who loves each other and that’s okay, but are you really going to throw what you and Jacob have away for the piece of him that cares for Renesmee? Jacob and Renesmee decided that their feelings are insignificant compared to his for you - they both decided that, with no romantic history or amazing love story. That’s not second-best. He’s choosing you because he can; because he wants to.”

”It still scares me,” she whispered. “You saw how quickly Sam left me for you and I just can’t let that happen again. The first time, it was no fault of anyone’s, but this time? If I get hurt, it’s my fault for not guarding myself more. For knowing what I’m up against and blindly and stupidly ignoring it.”

”They’ve already shown you that they’re not Sam and I,” Emily said wisely.

Leah reached over and hugged her friend tightly. “Thanks, Em.”

“Do you have anymore clarity?”

Leah nodded, “I’m going to take today to just… think about everything. Can I stay here for a bit though? I kind of left him asleep in my bed.”

“Leah!” 

“He’s clothed!” She said, finally finding a smirk creep up on her lips despite the heaviness of the last week. “We just… fell asleep.”

Emily laughed, and Leah curled up on the opposite side of the couch as Emily turned on a movie. “And Em?”

“Yeah?”

“You’re no one’s second best. The love Sam has for you is… staggering. I’ve felt it. Trust me, our past was great, but it’s nothing compared to his future with you.”

Emily gave her a small smile, and the girls laughed and talked for the remainder of the morning, falling back into a comfortable friendship. When she went to leave later that day, she hugged Emily.

”Thank you,” she said softly before pulling back. 

“What are friends for?”

Leah left and walked back home. When she got back and inside, she saw her mom and Charlie on the couch, talking to Seth.

”You left early this morning,” Seth said as she entered. “Are you okay?”

”Fine,” she said easily, knowing he heard everything the night before with his wolf-hearing.

”Jacob just left,” Sue responded. “Is he staying here again?” Last she heard Leah had just been fresh out of a relationship with Jeremy and love-sick over Jacob who seemed just as conflicted in his feeling as her daughter was.

”No, we were just up late talking, and he stayed over - completely platonic,” she said, collapsing back into the small armchair.

”You don’t look well,” Charlie commented. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

”Positive, just tired.” Her back was still bothering her a little, but her headache and nausea was gone.

”How’s Abigail?” Leah asked, wanting to get the topic off her and Jacob. “I haven’t seen her around lately.”

”We hang out at her place usually. It’s a little more normal there than here with the guys here most of the time and stuff.”

Leah nodded, “And things are going well?”

”Perfect,” Seth replied simply. “She’s great.”

”How are you doing about the pregnancy?” Sue asked, just hearing about it herself from Emily’s mom the other day.

”Fine,” Leah said easily. “I’m really happy for them.”

”Maybe we should have dinner tomorrow. Us, Sam, Emily, Billy, Rachel, Paul, and Jacob.”

”Mom, no-”

”Why? I thought you were mending fences. Come to think of it, maybe Jacob can fix the stair railing that he broke while he’s here. I’ll call them and invite them all over here. Besides, I’d like to talk to Billy.”

Leah’s eyes went over to the railing and she sighed, “Jacob and I are… complicated right now.”

“The Cullen’s left this morning,” Charlie said simply to Sue, knowing Leah and Jacob’s history as well as his and Renesmee’s to a degree. “I’ve been meaning to tell you. Renesmee is… a woman, now, and they needed to relocate to avoid further scrutiny. Leaving Jacob was hard on Renesmee, but they decided it was best if he stayed here.” 

That was the simple explanation, Leah thought bitterly.

Sue’s brow furrowed, and she looked between Charlie and her daughter, understanding the implications and wondering how much of their decision was because of her daughter and if so, what that meant exactly. She knew that Charlie knew the basics when it came to the Cullen’s - and Jacob, and she also knew that Charlie was aware that Seth and Leah were also involved with Jacob since they had left La Push to follow him to the Cullen’s, but Sue had never actually said to him that her children were shapeshifters like Jacob, and she didn’t plan to. Charlie wasn’t stupid, though.

Sue nodded, taking in the information, but it was Seth who spoke. “It took all I had not to go off on him last night.”

Leah looked to her brother, who’s eyes were full of confliction. “Seth-”

”No, I haven’t heard you cry like that since Sam. What he did… I understand if you don’t forgive him. I know you probably want to, and he’s trying his best, trust me, I understand what he’s up against here, but I warned him what would happen if he hurt you, and he didn’t listen.”

The words were laced with a heated, angry passion that Leah hadn’t heard from her brother’s lips before and she frowned. She was about to tell him that she could look after herself, though, when her mom’s voice rang through the living room. “What happened last night?”

Leah took a deep breath and let it out slowly, and Seth studied his sister. Unfortunately, she didn’t seem to have the resolve to say the words, so he decided to. “Jacob came over begging Leah to forgive him - telling her that he wanted to be with her.”

”Oh?” Sue asked, cutting Seth off, confusion in her voice. “I take it you’ve told Jacob how you feel?”

Leah nodded, “Last week.”

“And?” Sue pressed.

“He told me he felt the same – not in so many words, but he kind of asked me to wait to see what happened with Renesmee before he could really commit to anything with me.”

“Then,” Seth said firmly, his anger palpable. “He kissed Renesmee and then confessed his love for Leah, and she told him to leave her alone, but he kept pushing. I sent him away from here three times the past week, but last night he seemed pretty distressed so I let him in.”

The room grew silent, and Sue sighed, “What did he say?”

”It doesn’t matter,” Leah whispered. “Seriously, mom, I’m fine. I can deal with Jacob and I.”

”You didn’t sound fine last night,” Seth pointed out.

”I’m allowed to be upset without everyone worrying about me, okay!?” She cried. “This is my fault - my own doing, don’t blame Jacob.”

Seth’s anger grew exponentially. “Don’t blame Jacob!? How can I not blame him when he came to you last night and told you he loves you, but that he almost slept with Renesmee!? You’re my sister, Leah. You can pretend all you want that you need to protect me, but I’m the man of the house, and I need to protect you.”

Seth felt the pressure to step up since his dad died, but only when he imprinted on Abigail did he really understand what that meant. Leah frowned, and Sue pinched the bridge of her nose. “Okay, kids-”

”No, we’re not kids anymore,” Seth said firmly, standing up. “And you’re not his play-toy,” he said to his sister. “I admire Jacob, I really do, he’s like a brother to me, but he’s not going to hurt you - not like Sam did. Not anymore and not when I’m around. I finally got you back.”

”Got me back?” Leah asked, looking up her brother from her seat as he hovered over her. 

Seth frowned, his anger slowly dissipating. “The old you - you were finally happy. I don’t want you to be sad anymore.”

Leah’s heart broke in her chest at his words, and she gulped back the growing lump in her throat. Apparently not being a wolf anymore also heightened her emotions - including stimulating her tear ducts more. She reached out to take her little brother’s hand, but he was right, he was a man now. “I promise you; I won’t be that girl anymore. Jacob and I knew what we were getting into, Seth. I knew what position I was putting myself in, and I accept my fault in this. But, Jacob also helped me a lot, and he’s a good guy.”

Seth sighed, “I know you love him - Hell, I know he loves you, too, I just… don’t want you to be sad anymore.”

“I won’t be,” she promised. “Jacob and I have a lot to talk about - and work through, if we decide to be together, but I promise not to bring you or anyone else into our mess anymore, okay?”

“I want you to be able to come to me,” he persisted. 

“So that you can tear Jake’s head off when we argue?” Leah mused.

Seth chuckled, “If it comes to that, yeah. Maybe I’d be a good Alpha after all.”

Leah smiled, wanting to change the subject. “What about Beta?”

”What do you mean?”

Leah shrugged, not caring that Charlie was there - he knew enough by now. “Now that I’ve stepped down, Jacob needs someone by his side. With everything that’s happened we haven’t gotten a chance to ask you to step up into the role.”

Seth was floored, but he cleared his throat, “Really?”

”Really. How about you go over and talk to him about it? And make peace with him. I’m serious, Seth. If you’re going to help him run things, you need to remove me from the equation.”

He hesitated but nodded. “If you need me, though… I’m not five anymore. We’re family.”

Leah got up and hugged her brother - who was now taller than her, tightly. “I know, I love you, but I’m going to be fine, okay? Go talk to Jake. Tell him I’ll reach out when I’m ready.”

Seth sighed, but hugged her back and nodded. When he left, Sue looked to Leah. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

”I will be,” she promised. 

“So you’re… phased out?”

”Completely. I figured with school in the fall it was the best bet. Jacob agreed.”

“I’m proud of you.”

Leah smiled, “I’ll give you two sometime alone. I need to grab a shower anyways.”

Sue knew that Leah was hurting, but she seemed okay - a lot better than before now that she was actually feeling her emotions instead of bottling them up, and she wanted to give her some space.

“I guess a family dinner is out of the question with Bella, Edward, and Renesmee gone, huh?” Sue asked Charlie. Especially since it didn’t seem as though Leah, Jacob, and Renesmee were anywhere close to being able to be in room together anytime soon by her new knowledge.

”Did your kids agree?”

“I mentioned it to Leah last week, before all of the drama happened, and she said okay -”

“I didn’t get a chance to ask them since they left so quickly, but I’ll call Bells later and see if they can come back for a visit a little sooner and we can tell them all then, okay?”

Sue smiled and nodded, “Okay. If it’s too much trouble, though, we can tell them separately-”

”No, I think it’s important to do this together.”

Leah laid on her bed, emotionally exhausted. The sheets still smelt like Jacob, making sleep a lost cause despite her exhaustion. She hauled herself out of bed a few minutes later and got a shower before isolating herself in her room for the remainder of the day. She was grateful that Jacob didn’t bother her.

As evening was coming near, Seth checked in on her when he got back from Jake’s. “Leah?” He asked, knocking, before she called out for him to come in. “You up for a pack meeting tonight?”

“That was fast,” Leah said, sitting up on her elbows. She had been watching the comedy channel on TV and relaxing on her bed. Apparently, she was still wolf enough to be considered applicable to pack meetings and she wasn’t sure if she was grateful to be included or annoyed that she really couldn’t get away from pack matters. She was tired from the emotional roller coaster of the past few days and was hoping to take a nap soon, but it looked like she had other responsibilities to tend to. “I take it that you two have mended fences?”

Seth shrugged and walked over to sit on the edge of her bed on the end. “With the pack involved it seems that way.”

“How did your talk go?”

“Alright,” he shrugged. “Stuck mostly to pack-issues. It was kind of awkward, but we’ll tell everyone tonight. Jacob offered the firepit at his place to have a fire and relax with everyone after the meeting.” Leah wasn’t too thrilled about seeing Jacob just yet, and she sighed. “Get ready and we can go over together.”

Leah nodded, and Seth disappeared before she got up and sat at her barely used vanity. Before realizing what she was doing, she had applied a full face of make-up. Foundation, powder, eye shadow, mascara, eye liner, and some minor contouring. It was something she used to do frequently – something that always got Sam’s attention and after everything that had happened, especially seeing Renesmee’s perfection earlier that day, she wanted to feel womanly. She curled her hair and teased it into a messier look that hung down to her collarbone. She finished off her look with a tame lipstick. 

She slipped into a pair of black, ripped jeans, and a white cropped sweater that hung sexily off her shoulders. It wouldn’t keep her toasty warm thanks to her wolf-temperature having checked-out, but it did look hot. She met Seth downstairs and even he looked twice.

“You look great,” he said, assuming her newfound love of make-up again was to, well, impress their Alpha. Regardless, she did look good – confident. “It’s not exactly fire-attire, but I’m sure Jake will love it.”

“It’s not for him,” she said, slipping into a pair of short, black booties. 

“Whatever you say.”

“It’s for me,” she returned as he shrugged his sneakers on. Seth gave her a speculative look and Leah sighed. “Seeing Renesmee earlier today-“

“You can’t compare yourself to her,” Seth snapped. “You’re not comparable.”

Leah sighed, but decided not to dignify him with a response. “Is Abigail coming?”

“After we talk secret pack-talk, yeah,” Seth said easily. 

“She doesn’t know about the wolf-thing yet?”

“I’ve been trying to ease her into it – establish an actual relationship, first.”

They left the house and started walking to Jacob’s. Leah smiled, “My brother – the gentleman.”

He rolled his eyes, but chuckled. “I’m going to tell her tonight – after the fire. She’s, uh, coming over after…”

Leah stopped walking and put a hand on her hip. “Seth-“

“Dad and mom already beat you to the sex talk,” he said, continuing to walk so that his sister didn’t see the blush creeping up on his cheeks. “And I don’t plan on anything happening anytime soon, so don’t start.”

Leah may not have been able to see his face, but she could imagine his embarrassment and she grinned before continuing to walk. “My lips are sealed,” she promised. “But if you do need… uh, well, you know, condoms, you’re in a wolf pack with lots of guys who have access so just, uh, be safe, okay?”

Seth groaned, “I think I got it under control.”

The conversation dropped there and Leah suddenly realized based on today’s revelations how grown up Seth was now. He was far from the kid who had joined Jacob’s pack, even. A few months really could change someone. She grinned as they approached Jacob’s and Seth ran over to Embry and Quil – putting distance between him and his sister in efforts to avoid any more awkward talk about him and Abigail’s future intimacy. 

Leah almost laughed and Rachel walked out of the front of the house and over to her. The rest of the guys were there except for Sam, but she saw Sam and Emily walking toward the house from the opposite direction she and Seth had just come. 

“Hey,” Rachel greeted happily. “How are you?”

“How do you know?” Leah asked, seeing her friend’s sympathetic face.

She sighed, an armful of marshmallows for the fire. The sun had set about an hour ago and Leah looked away to see the flickering orange fire. “Paul told me earlier. I’m sorry, Lee.”

“It’s fine,” she said strongly, looking back to her friend and giving her a convincing smile. “Seriously. Let’s have fun tonight.”

Although Rachel felt bad for her brothers’ actions, she was glad that Leah seemed okay. She had a right to not be, but well, Leah’s emotional rollercoaster was also starting to give her whiplash and she knew how badly Jacob felt and was starting to come to terms with wanting them to work it out now that it seemed to be an option. Still, this was up to them and not her and she wanted to put some distance between her opinion and their relationship. “Let’s go sit down.”

Emily and Sam approached, and Sam squeezed Leah’s shoulder as he passed by, before joining the others. Emily engulfed her into a hug, and Rachel raised a brow, cluing into why she wasn’t getting the brunt of Leah’s misery. Emily already had. 

“How are you?”

“I’m fine,” she promised. “What about you?”

Emily put a hand on her belly and smiled, “Great. Ready to eat a million s’mores. This baby has a sweet-tooth.”

The girls laughed and went over to sit on a log together. 

“You look hot,” Rachel mused. “To get back at my brother, I presume?”

Leah shrugged, “Nah. For me.”

Emily smiled, sensing Leah’s strength, but as Jacob came back, she watched the familiar heartbreak turn over her features and sighed. Jacob noticed her immediately and did a double take before he put the wood down by the fire.

“I think he likes it,” Rachel giggled.

“And I think,” Leah sighed. “We need to mend fences.” 

She got up, surprising both girls – and the guys, who had found out earlier thanks to Jacob phasing exactly what had happened. Hence Paul filling Rachel in, and well, things never stayed quite for long. She ignored their stares – mostly filled with sympathy, unease, or in Embry’s face – fascination, at her new appearance, and walked over to Jacob, who was eyeing her from across the fire.

“Can we talk?”

“I thought you hated that line,” he said, trying to bring a lightness to his words.

She shrugged, “Renesmee came by to see me before she left.”

They had an audience, but they were simply talking – nothing scandalous. Wolf-hearing wasn’t forgiving anyways.

“She did?” He reached out to take her wrist and lead her away from the fire, for a little bit more privacy – if that was even possible.

Leah followed and nodded, “Wanted to tell me that she was letting you go and all that.”

Jacob nodded, his eyes scanning over every part of her face, taking in the effort she put in – not that she needed it. “And that still didn’t convince you that her and I are over?”

“There’s not much to convince,” she said easily. 

“I’ll do anything, Leah-“

“You’ve done enough,” she said sternly. “I need space to figure out where we go from here.”

“I appreciate that,” he said finally, sighing. “But everything I said last night, about choosing you – loving you, was all true. I fucked up, we both know that, but give me a chance to make it up to you and I promise-“

“I don’t want any more promises, Jake.”

He nodded, “Well I’ll show you. I don’t expect you to forgive me that quickly, but I will make it up to you and I hope that’s enough. You look beautiful, by the way. A final fuck you to me for screwing up, huh?” The corner of his mouth turned up into a nervous smirk and a ghost of a smile appeared briefly on Leah’s lips.

“I think you’re beating yourself up without me throwing salt in the wound.”

“I think you like throwing salt,” he teased, feeling a familiar banter establishing between them.

She wasn’t sure if she should let her guard down – or if she wanted to, and she decided not to take the bait for friendly teasing. “We should get back.” He nodded and reached out to offer her his hand. She hesitated.

“Please, Leah, let me make this up to you.” He asked, pleading with her now. “All I want-“

“What you want doesn’t matter right now,” she said pointedly. “You took your sweet time in figuring out what you wanted, so now it’s my turn to be able to approach this with a clear head. You knew where I stood, and you still ended up in bed with her.” She couldn’t help the bitterness that escaped. She really had wanted to be cool and collected in this conversation, but she was still hurt. As she looked up to his face, and studied his lips, once again she was hit with the sobering reality that they had last been on Renesmee’s body and not hers. She pointedly looked away and Jacob gulped back a growing lump in his throat.

The guys were all talking, joking, and laughing, but as he looked back to the group of their friends, and back to Leah, he knew they were all waiting on them and sighed. “I’ll regret that mistake for the rest of my life,” he said, the seriousness in his voice causing her to shiver. He noticed and sighed, attributing it to the cold. “At least come sit by me to warm up. As hot as that outfit is, you must be cold.”

She nodded, and they walked back together. Leah sat in between Jacob and Embry and tried to avoid the sympathetic stares from everyone as they grew quiet. Honestly? The look in Embry’s eyes when she sat down kind of made her uncomfortable – Jacob noticed and was ready to once and for all end his little crush on his girlfriend but sighed as soon as the thought crossed his mind. Leah wasn’t his and may never be again thanks to his actions.

Trying to clear his mind, he stood up and addressed the pack.  
“So, as you’re all aware, the Cullen’s left this morning. That means a little more normalcy here in La Push. Leah’s the first member to officially have been able to phase out, so the option is there for any other pack members who would like the out now that things are quiet. With Leah phasing out, though, and me needing to stick around to be a reinforcing member of the pack for the younger members to get their own phasing under control, I need a new Beta. I’ve asked Seth to step up in the role and I know he’s going to be very helpful.”  
Quil and Embry, sitting beside Seth, jostled his shoulder teasingly and the other guys nodded their approval. 

“Unless anyone has any questions or objections, I guess that’s really it.” Short and sweet.

The guys were content enough with the change in leadership – unlike when Leah took the role, they really did all respect and admire Seth. Plus, the older wolves would probably start taking a back burner to the pack such as Paul and Sam and eventually, Jared. They were all grateful for things to begin to go back to normal. A few beers were passed around and they all fell back into chatting and hanging out. Jacob sat back down beside her and took a beer himself.

“I have an idea,” Jacob said suddenly, grasping her attention as Abigail joined everyone and Seth curled up on a log with her under a blanket. Leah turned to him and raised a brow. “Phase – me and you now and I can show you.”

“Show me what? You and Renesmee-“

“No,” he said firmly. “How I feel about you – how it’s different. If you see it – feel it… at least you won’t question my intentions moving forward.”

She thought back to Sam telling her he trusted Jacob because of what he showed him, and felt the intrigue, but really didn’t want to shed her clothes right now. “Maybe later, I’m not sure how my mascara will make-out in a phasing episode.” Her words were teasing, but Jacob knew her concern wasn’t on her make-up, but other things that she may see. 

He sighed, “You’re beautiful without that stuff, you know.”

“Renesmee seems to be keen on it, or did you not notice?”

He deserved every bit of venom that came out of her mouth, and he knew it, but he was willing to take it if it meant that someday she would forgive him. “I don’t care what she does,” he said finally. “I do care about you, though, and no matter what you put on your face, it doesn’t compare to when you first wake up in the morning.” Admittedly, he thought back to those knee-highs, picturing them on Leah. God, she was beautiful. How did he let this happen?

Leah gulped back a growing lump in her throat. Jacob was nursing his beer, but she decided to keep a clear head tonight and avoid alcohol. It amazed her at despite how upset and angry she was at him; his words could still evoke a shiver up her spine in a less than plutonic way. She looked away from his heavy gaze, knowing her eyes would betray her. He reached down, knowing he succeeded in breaking her walls down slightly, to intertwine his fingers with hers. She was about to protest when something else caught her attention: Quil and Embry whooping and hollering. 

She turned her attention, her fingers resting easily in Jacob’s still, to see Seth lip-locked with Abigail. They pulled apart at the boys teasing, both of their cheeks flushed, and Leah grinned before pointedly looking away as they looked at each other. It was a picture-perfect imprint, but he was also her baby brother and she felt like she was intruding watching them – even if they were hardly in private. 

“He seems happy,” Jacob murmured.

“Very happy,” she agreed.

“We could be that happy,” he promised, whispering in her ear, causing another chill to go up her spine. He pulled her close, wrapping an arm around her waist and she leaned into his warmth as the wind blew through and goosebumps raised on her flesh. She wasn’t sure if it was because of the breeze or because of Jacob.

“We’re not imprinted,” she said firmly, avoiding his gaze as she watched the fire flicker.

“We’re mates, remember?”

Leah groaned, finally meeting his gaze. “Do all of the guys know about that? Because I know that they know about Renesmee.” She barely had any time to think about their ‘mating’ status since everything happened with Renesmee.

“No,” he said simply.

She looked away, “Do you miss her?”

“I miss you.” She was silent for a moment, and he sighed. “I still owe you dinner. How about-“

“Dinner isn’t going to fix this, Jake.”

“It’s a start,” he said as she finally met his gaze. 

“I wish we could go back to before…”

“Me, too,” he whispered.

Their faces were so close. She was still leaning into him for warmth; his arm around her hips, and without thinking, falling back into a familiar comfort with her, he leaned down to enclose the distance between their lips, causing her to pull back.

“Jake…” she closed her eyes. He wasn’t sure what to say, but he felt a huge ache in his chest. He wished so badly he could turn back time and reject Renesmee immediately and his guilt was eating him alive. He pulled back from her, sighing and she turned to face him on the log. She felt tears stinging her eyes and she cursed herself for being so weak. After all, everyone was still around talking and laughing, but it was so clear to her in that moment how comfortable she was with Jacob and how good he made her feel, despite the Renesmee fiasco. He wouldn’t meet her gaze and she reached out to put a hand on his thigh before he turned. “I want to take things slow.” She forced her words out, remembering her conversations with Emily and Sam earlier. “If you’re serious about the imprint being done and swear to me that when you see her again… nothing will happen…”

“What are you saying?” He asked as he faced her.

Leah hesitated before her free hand reached up to cup his cheek. She took a deep breath before leaning in, pressing her lips gingerly to his. It only lasted a second, but Leah felt the passion coursing through the small kiss. It had also evoked some gazes from the others around, but she fixed her eyes on Jacob’s. “I want to forgive you. It’s going to take time, but… I want you; I want us back. I love you, and I don’t know if I’m being the stupidest person in the world right now or if you’re my forever. I have so many more questions than answers and I’ll probably never get them, but if you’re willing to fight for us, then I am, too.”

Jacob smiled and reached out, his hand tangling in her hair as he pulled her closely, his lips hot on hers. It felt too private to be on display for everyone, but she kissed him back feverishly before he pulled back, resting his forehead against hers. “I love you, Leah Clearwater.”

His words made her heart clench and she nodded before saying four, powerful words. “I love you, too.”

“I’ll never let you down again.”

“Don’t make promises that you can’t keep,” she taunted.

He chuckled, and Rachel changed the music to something slower.

A Moment Like This, by Kelly Clarkson. 

Leah looked over to her friend, who grinned as Paul took her hand. Evidently, Sam also grabbed Emily’s, Seth Abigail’s, and Jared and Kim. Embry and Quil were on the sidelines chatting and the younger wolves were laughing and joking with Collin and Brady.

A makeshift dancefloor quickly developed around the fire and Jacob extended his hand to Leah. She smiled and took his hand as they stood. He pulled her closely and no matter how scared she was about giving him her heart again, wrapping her arms around Jacob’s neck made her feel safe as she felt his arms tighten around her waist. They would do this, she thought. They had to.

She rested her head against his chest, and he inhaled the scent of her shampoo, burying his face in her hair. “Nothing has ever felt righter,” he whispered.

Leah smiled and looked up to him as his lips crashed against hers. She didn’t say anything, and their bodies stopped swaying as he kissed her passionately. When the song came to an end, they were still lip locked and he gently lifted her off her feet as she wrapped her legs around his waist, breaking their kissing to hug him tightly.

“Get a room,” Quil called teasingly to them as all of the other imprints kissed their other halves.

Jacob chuckled and put Leah down begrudgingly. “Jealous, Ateara?”

“You guys can’t stay mad at each other long, huh?” Rachel teased.

Leah looked up to Jacob and she felt it – like he was the other half of her whole. Jacob pulled her close, wanting to make everything up to her even more, and he sighed happily as she curled into his chest. Finally, he thought, a real relationship. “I guess that’s what mates means.”

“Mates?” Rachel asked, quirking a brow as they all sat back down, around the fire.

“Jake-“ Leah said before he gave her a goofy smile. 

“Yeah, Carlisle has a theory.”

“The vamp?” Paul asked. “What does he think he knows now?”

“Please, not now,” Leah pleaded.

He looked down to her and grinned, “May as well cement our future with the others, huh?” Plus, Abigail had just went inside to the bathroom.

“Cement is a strong word considering you’re not totally forgiven yet and Carlisle’s only guessing.”

He chuckled but turned back to the others. “Carlisle thinks that Leah and I have, uh, mated, in the traditional sense of wolves. Which is why I’m able to push the imprint away.”

Jared quirked a brow, “What does that even mean?” 

He gave them a quick rundown and was met with both unsuspecting and strange looks. 

“Well then,” Paul mused. “Guess we know why you went at it so much. You sure that Leah’s not pregnant with a litter yet?” He snorted and Seth rolled his eyes.

Leah groaned and buried her face into Jacob’s chest. He chuckled, “What can I say, I can’t keep my hands off her.”

Leah blushed and rolled her eyes before kissing him.

“Okay, seriously, get a room to test your… uh, mating theory, but don’t do it here,” Paul groaned.

The guys asked some more questions and Jacob answered them to the best of his ability until Abigail came back and the conversation changed into something easier. He knew the guys had been holding back their jokes earlier, probably because of his and Leah’s less than ideal start to the night, but they spent the rest of the night with the others, joking and laughing – and stealing kisses.

When everyone started to leave, Emily growing tired and the younger wolves having school in the morning, Jacob turned to Leah. Seth had already left with Abigail. “I’ll walk you home.”

“I can get home myself,” she teased.

“I want to, just let me put the fire out, first.”

Leah stayed back and Rachel came over. “I take it all is forgiven?”

She shrugged, “We’ve got some things to work on, but-“

“But you love each other.”

Leah nodded. “It feels like we belong together.”

“Well, aside from this mating theory,” she cringed. “I mean, you do seem like a good fit.” She hugged her friend. “Maybe someday I’ll have a new sister – officially.” 

Leah laughed, “Don’t get too far ahead of yourself. We’re just testing the waters.”

She rolled her eyes as Paul called out to her. “Well test them somewhere else tonight, cause dad’s home,” she teased, winking.

Leah flushed, and Rachel ran off as Jacob came over and took her hand. “Ready?”

She nodded, and they began the short walk home. “Seth’s telling Abigail tonight.”

“Is he now? ‘Bout time.”

“I think things are… getting serious with them.”

Jacob looked down at her, brow quirked. “Want me to talk to him?”

She laughed, “Not sure he wants to talk to his sister’s boyfriend about sex.”

“Boyfriend?”

Leah looked away and shrugged, “I mean, it’s safe to say that we’ve surpassed labels at this point.”

Jacob smirked, “Is this boyfriend allowed to stay over tonight?”

Leah hesitated, but nodded. “I think he may be.”

Jacob smirked and they finished walking back to her house. She had to have faith; hope. When they got there, she heard Seth downstairs with Abigail, and she and Jacob grabbed some snacks before heading upstairs. She had filled up on s’mores around the fire and was feeling a little off, but she curled up with him on her bed and turned on the TV like old times but unfortunately, she yawned about half-way through and Jacob turned off the TV.

”Get some rest,” he said as she curled into him, enjoying his warmth.

”I get it now,” she mused.

”Hm?”

”Why the imprint’s are always cuddled into their boyfriends.”

He chuckled, “Is it just my warmth that you’re using me for?”

She felt the smile fade from her lips as she met his gaze. Something more primal took over and she gulped, biting her lower lip. “I’d like to use you for a lot of different things,” the words fell out of her mouth. 

Jacob looked at her, the familiar passion igniting in his eyes. “If you’re too tired…”

She shook her head before pressing her lips to his, the overwhelming feeling that she was whole with him taking over as he returned the passion easily. Their tongues danced together, and he leaned over her, his fingers brushing up the side of her hip and up further, underneath her shirt. His fingers caressed her tanned skin under her sweater, and she made quick work of his shirt, easily peeling it off his torso and throwing it to the floor. She look in his muscular chest, feeling her own desire growing with every second - she wanted him in every way.

Unfortunately, as Jacob shed her sweater and his fingers went to her red, laced bra, Leah felt crushing insecurity and pulled back. Jacob did the same, looking at her confused until he realized. The bra.

”Leah…”

”I’m sorry,” she said softly, unable to meet his gaze as she sat up and he rolled over to the side. “I just… can’t stop picturing it.”

”You’re the only one on my mind right now,” he promised, reaching out to take her hand as she met his eyes. “The only woman I want.”

Leah sighed. As confident as she felt, it was faltering. She needed to get back in a good head space. “Give me a second?”

Jacob nodded as she got up and rummaged through her dresser before disappearing into the bathroom across the hall. He fell back on the bed, sighing, wondering how he could even begin to convince her of his true feelings as the door opened again and he looked up, the entire room void of air.

”Leah…”

She was dressed in a nude-colored ensemble. The one-piece covered everything it needed to but had a cut-out in the mid-section so that he could see her belly button and ribcage. The fabric was see-through all around but had floral shapes in the material to cover what was necessary. Honestly, in something like that, it was almost unnecessary to even attempt coverage. The top half was connected to the bottom on the sides and her breasts were covered with the floral, thin fabric, too, up to her neck, where two little straps tied around her back. He licked his lips, feeling his throat go dry. 

“Do you like it? It doesn’t have a bra strap,” she said teasingly, walking over to him.

He sat on the edge of the bed, reaching out to touch her hips, letting his fingers gently skim over the fabric before tracing her bare skin at the end of the little getup. “If you get any sexier, I’m going to have to lock you away,” he said, voice husky and thick with lust.

She smirked, trying to stay in the moment with him and focus on moving forward. “I think you’ll like the back even more,” she said, stepping away from his grasp. She watched his gaze intently before she turned around, and Jacob immediately stood up.

It was all straps. Two straps from her neck down to meet two more keeping the chest piece up, which met two more to keep the material tight to her ribcage in front, and two other straps on her hips, meeting the thong back. He wanted to rip it off, but he liked it too much. Instead, he forced himself to remain some semblance of control and he reached out to turn her around. She barely caught the animalistic passion on his face before he picked her up off her feet and she wrapped her legs around his waist. He pushed her against the nearby wall and his lips suffocated hers.

No matter how he looked at Renesmee, she thought idly, it couldn’t have compared to that. She kissed him back fiercely as his fingers reached up to push the shoulder straps off. The top of the lingerie fell and keeping her up, he let his lips travel down to her hard nipples, taking them into his mouth, licking and sucking. The soft moans escaping her lips were music to his ears and he knew this was exactly where he belonged. He pulled her away from the wall a moment later and brought her over to the bed, throwing her down on it. His dominance caught her by surprise and was a huge turn-on and she pulled him down on top of her after pushing down his jeans and boxers in one, fluid motion.

”I’m yours,” she said softly as he hovered over her. 

“And I’m yours,” he promised her, kissing her again before his fingers quickly - and excruciatingly carefully, removed the rest of her ensemble. 

“Jake, wait-” Leah said quickly, just as his hips were about to crash into hers.

“What?” Had she changed her mind?

“Uh, what about... well, a condom?” She saw his confusion on his face, and she sighed. “I’m not phasing anymore… who knows what my body thinks?”

“What Carlisle said really got to you, huh?”

She blushed, and sighed. “Better to be safe than sorry?”

“Only you would pick right now to remember a condom,” he groaned.

Leah propped herself up on her arms as he rolled away from her. “Just… pull out?”

”Effective birth control, Clearwater,” he chuckled. “Not sure the ‘pull out’ method is considered a real method by any healthcare practitioner. I didn’t even finish high school and I know that.”

”Is that a no?”

Jacob could smell her arousal and he leaned over to pull her on top of him, straddling his hips. “I’ll do my best,” he winked.

”Jake!”

”I’ll be careful,” he promised as she lowered her hips onto his, evoking muffled moans from each of their lips as they kissed. After all, as far as he knew her body hadn’t returned its original cycle yet, so he was sure until that happened, they were fine. 

Leah moved her body on his, feeling every inch of him coaxing her desire on. She rubbed her lower half against his, fast, then slow, then faster.

”Roll over,” Jacob said suddenly.

”What, why?”

”I can’t exactly pull out if you’re on top,” he said, reminding her of her birth control dilemma.

She blushed but nodded and got off of him, falling back against the pillows. “Not so fast,” he smirked, turning her over easily onto her belly.

”Jake, what the-”

He took her hips in his hands, raising them up to meet his own as she laid, face-down into the pillows. As he plunged his lower half into hers, feeling the new contact, she cried out, and he groaned, moving inside her. It didn’t take long, as he moved inside of her, gripping her ass.

Leah had a million objections come to mind as soon as she realized what he was doing - wolf mating the first, the guys jokes about doggy style the second, but as soon as he entered her, it was blissful, and she found herself pushing her face into the pillows to muffle the loud moans escaping her lips. Just as she felt her entire body tense, she felt Jacob groan and immediately remove himself from her, his release ending up on her backside.

She had been so, so close, and she sighed before she sat up, facing Jacob.

”So you did want to mount me?” She asked, raising a brow. 

Jacob couldn’t help but to chuckle and she got on her knees, facing him, feeling his fluids all over her backside. “You didn’t seem to mind.”

”I do mind that I’m left high and dry,” she replied sexily. 

Jacob smirked as she wrapped her arms around his neck, their bodies pressed tightly together. His hand caressed down her hip and ended up between her legs, causing her to buckle against him. “I’d never leave you high and dry, don’t you know me better than that by now?”

She kissed him, feeling the dirtiness of their friends with benefits activities seeping through as he moved his finger in and out of her, his thumb caressing her clit before added another finger, then another. She soon felt the warmth of her orgasm flood her and she cried out, her body convulsing against Jacob’s. His free hand kept her up, pressed tightly to him, while his other hand continued to move inside of her until she was still.

“That was so hot,” he said as she buried her face into the crook of his neck. He wrapped his arms tightly around her waist, keeping her close. “I love you.”

Leah pulled back, the words seeming so out of place in his mouth, yet so perfectly blissful and right. “I love you, too.”

He smiled and placed a gentle kiss to her lips. “Think Seth will give us shit tomorrow?”

”Definitely,” she laughed.

”I guess this means you’re going to have to go shopping.”

”Hm?”

”For more of those,” he gestured to the lingerie on the floor. “And condoms.”

”I may have some more of those up my sleeve. I thought Billy gave you condoms?” 

“Only one box,” he said teasingly. 

Leah grinned and rolled her eyes as the laid back in bed together, slipping under the sheets. Jacob kissed her forehead, bringing her close as sleep overcome them both.


	15. Positive

The next morning came quickly. Jacob’s eyes fluttered open and took in the sight of Leah’s head on his chest, hair sprawled out around his torso, and sweat accumulating on her forehead thanks to his wolf-temp. A smile immediately adorned his lips, feeling entirely at peace with her in his arms. He didn’t want to wake her, but he did have to go to the bathroom. Adjusting her gently, he managed to slip out of bed, throwing on his boxers. He quietly opened her door and was about to leave her room when he ran straight into Sue.

“Jacob!” She exclaimed, just as he was about to shut the door. 

“Sue-“

Sue turned her eyes away from his indecent body quickly. “I didn’t realize you were here,” she said quickly.

“Uh, yeah,” he rubbed the back of his neck with his hand. He wasn’t sure how much Sue knew, and he really didn’t want to have the ‘You’re dating my daughter’ conversation with her in the hallway, scantily clad. “Leah’s still asleep-“

“I was,” a new voice came from the ajar door, pushing it open. She passed Jacob his pants and had thrown his shirt over her head, along with some pajama bottoms.

“I didn’t want to wake you,” he said apologetically, jumping into his jeans before Sue turned around to face them both, confusion clear on her features.

“What are you doing here?”

“It is my house,” Sue pointed out. “I didn’t think you and Jacob were… doing this anymore?”

Leah sighed and ran a hand through her long, black hair. “We’re, uh-“

“Together,” Jacob supplied, wanting Sue to know that he wasn’t just using her daughter for sex. Well, not anymore anyways.

Leah looked at him and couldn’t help the smile that tugged on the corners of her lips, but Sue was the one who responded. “Okay, well I guess you have plenty of time to fill me later in this morning.”

“What?”

“Shopping? Remember, I asked you to come to the grocery store with me to pick-up food for dinner tonight.”

Ah, shit. “Oh, right. What time is it?”

“10 AM.”

Leah sighed, “Give me enough time to shower?”

Sue looked between her and Jacob and sighed, “Yeah, that may be the best idea. I’ll go downstairs and see what else the pantry needs and clean up a little.”

She turned, but Jacob sighed, “Sue?”

“Yes, Jacob?”

“I love your daughter,” he said honestly. “I just… want you to know that. I know this looks… well, I know how it looks, but she’s amazing.” He looked to Leah who even in an oversize t-shirt with messy hair and pink, polka dot pajama pants, turned him on beyond belief and made his heart feel whole.

Sue nodded, clearly worried about the safety of her daughter’s heart, but trusting that Jacob’s intentions were, in fact, honorable. “Thank you, Jacob. I’m always going to worry about her, though, I’m her mother, after all. Try to… make yourself decent around the house, okay?”

Sue did leave then, and Jacob felt the breath he hadn’t realized he had been holding exhale from his lungs.

When Sue was out of sight and going back downstairs, Leah grinned and reached up to wrap her arms around his neck. “Amazing, huh?”

He chuckled, instinctively wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her as close as he could with the clothing between them. “You already know that.”

“True.” She leaned up and met Jacob’s lips in a passionate, but loving kiss – morning breath and all. “You should probably get going so I can clean up and have another lovely, self-deprecating talk with my mother about my roller coaster of a love life.”

“We’ve never been good at keeping it on the down-low, huh?” He chuckled nervously, letting her go. “So much for taking this slow.”

“I don’t do slow, remember?” she grinned.

“Slow is boring.”

She rolled her eyes, “Bye, Jake.”

She let him in the bathroom first and when he was done, she slipped in to shower, giving him back his shirt and he left. She barely had time to rationalize last night, or what it meant and she wasn’t sure if that was a good thing to avoid over-analyzing his ‘together’ definition, or if it was to avoid going over the million ways that this entire thing was doomed to fail. 

Unfortunately, as Leah stepped out of the shower, she noticed that she felt a little off. Her back was aching, and her stomach was a little nauseous, but she brushed it off to the emotional toll of the past week. 

She dried her hair, threw on some clothes and went downstairs.

“There’s mail for you on the counter,” her mom said while loading the dishwasher.

“I was going to clean up today,” Leah protested before she picked up the envelope absentmindedly with a piece of toast in her hand, hoping it would settle her stomach.

When she saw mail from the community college, she dropped the piece of toast on the counter and immediately ripped it open. It was an information packet, and Leah flipped through it. 

“Excited?” Sue asked, leaning against the sink, watching her daughters face transform.

“Extremely.”

It was only late March, but suddenly, September seemed like a welcome month. The fact that the community college was growing more enticing every day proved how badly she needed to exercise her mind again and get back into real life.

“Let’s get going.”

“Mom-“

“Forget about it,” Sue said, grabbing her keys. “I just want you to protect your heart, okay? I know how you feel about each other. I’ll call before coming over next time, and I’m getting the doctor at work to renew your birth control prescription.”

Leah gave her a thankful smile, and then they left. It felt like old times – shopping together and laughing. Before Harry died and before Sam broke her heart.  
When they got home later that day – with a bag of new clothes for her new school adventure in the fall, some new, well-needed make-up and personal hygiene products, and three armloads of groceries, Leah helped her mom prepare dinner.  
Along with her ditching her inner animal, her appetite also fell back into a normal pattern, which was so much more manageable, but as she smelled the food, she had to admit that she still felt a little off. When she heard the door open and people come in, she pushed the thought away. Charlie had gotten there about fifteen minutes ago and was helping her mom, so she went to greet Sam and Emily.

“Hey!” Emily cried happily, ecstatic that Leah and she were finally attempting to mend their tattered relationship – especially now that there would be a baby for the girls to bond over. Jacob had brought them back together and she was thankful.

“How are you feeling?”

Sam sat on the couch with Seth and Emily and Leah took the loveseat. “Alright,” Emily said softly, placing a hand on her little bump. She was glowing. “The morning sickness is gone and I’m able to eat pretty much anything again, so that’s nice.”

“How are you doing?” Emily asked.

”I’m okay,” she promised as the door opened. Rachel, Paul, Billy, Allison, and Jacob came in, and Leah bit her lower lip. He was dressed in a red button-down, with the sleeves rolled up to show his forearms, and a pair of dark wash jeans. All the passion from the night before came rolling back and it was a little overwhelming. Not quite as powerful as it was before the clearing, still, but palpable, nonetheless.   
Jacob sat beside Sam on the arm of the couch after kissing her quickly, Paul on the other side of Seth, and Rachel came over to join the girls as Billy and Allison went into the kitchen to check and see if Sue and Charlie needed any help.

”How’s wedding planning?” Emily greeted Rachel.

”Good,” Rachel said happily. “I... I think Paul and I will be settling down here after the wedding, too.”

“Really? You always wanted to get out of here.”

Rachel shrugged. “I want to give Jake a hand with dad. He’s done so much already, and its time that I stepped up. Plus, with Rebecca in Hawaii, I don’t really have anywhere I necessarily want to go. Mom wouldn’t want me to keep running away, and Paul’s mom is here, too. I don’t want to be the reason that he leaves his family.”

“I think that’s a great idea,” Leah admitted. “I mean... I hate this place so much sometimes, but it is home and it always will be.”

Rachel nodded, “Exactly. Plus, I know I’ll be happy as long as I’m with Paul, wherever that may be.”

“You’re going to make me sick,” Leah teased as Rachel rolled her eyes and all three girls laughed. The boys made mindless chit-chat and laughed and joked, but Leah was idly aware of Jacob’s eyes on her occasionally.

“How’s the nursery coming along?” Rachel asked.

“Alright, it’s coming together,” Emily responded. “I’m so excited.”

Leah smiled, Emily’s excitement radiating into her. Despite her romantic and fertility future so uncertain, it was nice to see her childhood best friend succeeding – even if it was with someone that Leah had taken years to come to terms with.

“We actually had something we wanted to tell you guys,” Emily said uneasily. “We were going to wait until dinner, but…”

Sue had just come back out with Charlie and everyone turned to Emily, who shared a glance with Sam, both beaming. “We found out what we’re having earlier today.”

“And!?” Rachel asked excitedly.

“A little girl,” Sam said, his face alight with joy. 

“Oh my God, Em!” Rachel cried, pulling her into a hug.

Leah couldn’t hide the big smile on her face, either, as she hugged Emily. “Congratulations.”

Rachel giggled, “So now can we go shopping??” 

Emily laughed, “Of course.”

The guys all congratulated Sam and Sue hugged them both, showing her excitement. 

“Do you have a name?” Leah asked.

Emily shook her head, “No, some ideas, but nothing concrete yet.”

“There’s lots of time,” Rachel added.

“Do you think you and Paul will have kids someday?” Emily asked her, wanting to get the attention off herself.

Rachel hesitated and shared a quick look with Paul, but smiled, “I’ve got to get through this wedding first. It’s so much.”

The girls exchanged some idle chit-chat – some more conversation about what classes Leah would take, Rachel’s wedding planning, and Emily’s pregnancy. It seemed despite all being in different places in life, things were starting to come around. 

Just then, there was a knock on the door and Seth jumped up to get it. 

Abigail walked in with her parents, presumably, and Sue came out of the kitchen again to meet them. “It’s so nice to meet you,” Sue said warmly.

”You as well, Mrs. Clearwater,” Abigail said sweetly. 

“You have a pretty great son,” her mom said honestly. 

Seth flushed and then him and Abigail joined the others as Sue and her parents exchanged some pleasantries before she introduced them to everyone and then finished getting dinner ready. It was ready not long after.

Everyone got up and went into the dining room where Sue had practically cooked a four-course meal. They pulled some extra chairs in and managed to squat around the table, but just as Leah was about to sit down, the smell of the food - which looked delicious, hit Leah immediately and she suddenly felt very ill. Maybe she wasn’t hungry, she thought idly. “Excuse me,” she said quickly making her way upstairs to the bathroom. She felt a strange warmth overcoming her and splashed cold water on her face before her stomach tightened, and she grasped the toilet bowl, paying homage to it. 

“Leah?” Jacob knocked on the door. “Are you okay?” She had excused herself politely enough, but he had been watching her and saw an uncanny look creep onto her features.

Leah took a few deep breaths in, head resting against the wall near the toilet. She felt a little better, but still clammy. “Fine,” she called.

“Can I come in?” 

“You probably don’t want to-“

Jacob pushed the unlocked door open, closing it behind him, and he sat on the edge of the tub. “You’re sick?”

Leah shrugged. “I haven’t felt myself the past few days,” she admitted. “I’ve been really nauseous and just... off. I thought it was just my body getting used to not phasing, but it’s getting worse, not better. Then I thought it was just stress, but now I’m not sure.” It was the only thing that made sense. The other guys talked about some aches and pains, too, as their bodies got used to not avoiding exploding into a large wolf daily so that had to be it. She was the only one to be officially phased out, though.

”Maybe,” he said idly. “I don’t think phasing should have anything to do with being sick, though.”

“Who knows, I’m not exactly a normal shapeshifter,” she said only half-jokingly. 

“Keep an eye on it and let me know how you are. If it has anything to do with phasing, I want to know.”  
“It’s probably just a bug.” 

Jacob got a cold cloth and gave it to Leah, seeing sweat accumulating on her forehead. “Run this on your head and see if you feel any better.”

”You should go get something to eat – and tell my mom I’m not feeling well. I think I’ll just lay down for a bit.”

Leah put the cool, damp cloth on her forehead, leaning back against the wall for a few, long moments before she got up and splashed some more cold water on her face. Jacob made sure she was okay in bed before going back downstairs – after all, he was starving, and Leah actually felt sleep overcome her until an hour later when Rachel pushed her door open after knocking.

”How are you feeling? Jake said you’re sick?” Rachel asked.

”I’m fine, what’s up?”

“I have a favor. My dad, Jacob, Emily, and I are going dress shopping just to try on some bridal gowns next week…”

“I’ll be there,” she promised. 

Rachel hovered in the doorway, not wanting to catch whatever it was Leah had. She gave her an appreciative smile, “You’re the best. I’ll go and let you rest.”

Unluckily for Jacob, he was forced into dinner conversation while Leah slept. They all grew familiar with Abigail and her parents, Rachel and Paul’s upcoming nuptials, Billy and Allison’s official ‘dating’ status, Sam and Emily’s daughter, and Sue and Charlie’s new living arrangements and Jacob felt like he would barf too, if he had to sit there any longer and listen.

Thankfully, once dinner was over, he ended up with the guys in the living room while the ladies insisted on cleaning up. He was just about to go check on Leah after Rachel came down when he heard his dad ask to speak with Sue in private and he raised a brow. Billy and Sue went out back on the small patio. It was finally warming up slightly, but Jacob was curious and decided to open a window in the living room to ‘let some air flow through’ the crowded house. With his wolf-hearing, he zoned in on his dad and Sue’s voices and was able to follow the conversation.

“-Our kids.”

“I know,” Sue’s voice rang out. “Things between them have definitely been rocky.”

“That’s an understatement. Jacob won’t even tell me what’s going on. I had to ask Paul what was going on this morning.”

“What did he say?”

“Just that they’re all kind of surprised that he could even attempt to fight the imprint, but from what Paul tells me, he can, and is, and wants to be with Leah. After last night, Paul said they seemed to have agreed on trying to figure things out.”

Sue sighed. “Yeah, I figured that out this morning.”

“What happened?” Billy asked, knowing Jacob hadn’t come home. 

Sue relayed the mornings events, then said, “They both love each other, that’s obvious. I wish there was something we could do to make things easier for them. They’ve been through so much.”

“They seemed happy together, before Renesmee, anyways. Allison and I came home a while back and they were laid on the couch with Rachel and Paul watching a movie. It was just nice to see all my kids happy. With Renesmee gone, now, I guess it should be easier for them. They seem infatuated with one another. I was skeptical, I admit, with the imprint, but they do seem like a good fit. I’ll speak to Jacob about what happened this morning.”

“I love Jacob like a son-“

“And I love Leah like a daughter. We’re family.”

“I don’t know what to do, Billy… I’ve talked to Charlie because I know he has experience with… well, a teenage daughter, especially when Edward left Bella, but he just keeps telling me to have faith and that she’ll be okay. I know she’s tough, but she has such a big heart and she’s still so fragile since Harry and Sam… I mean, she’s come a long way and she’s doing well, but I’d be lying if this whole thing didn’t worry me with the imprint still. I trust Jacob’s intentions, I do, and he makes her so happy and I see how much he cares about her when they’re together, but she can’t handle any more heartbreak.”

“I’ll talk to Jacob, okay?”

The conversation stopped and a minute later, Jacob heard the door in the back open and close again and he sighed. He got up off the couch, ignoring the guys, and went upstairs to check on Leah. When he pushed the door open, though, she was sound asleep, and he didn’t want to wake her. He quietly walked over, feeling her forehead. Her wolf-heat had disappeared, and she didn’t feel warm to him as though she had a fever. He climbed into bed with her, wrapping his arms around her waist. He jostled her, and she groaned, but turned to face him and cuddled into his chest, half-asleep. 

A little while later, after Jacob had dozed off himself, Sue came up to check on Leah. 

“Jacob?” Sue whispered.

“I came to check on her,” he said, his eyes fluttering open. He gently untangled himself from her and got up. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”

“It’s fine,” Sue sighed, going over to place a bottle of water and ginger-ale on Leah’s nightstand. 

“Sue?” Jacob said. “I won’t hurt her again – I promise.”

Sue gave him a motherly smile and went over, taking his hands in hers. “I know.”

“I should get going-“

“You can stay, if you’d like. Not promising you won’t have to deal with a sick Leah, though. She’s ten times moodier when she’s sick,” Sue only half-joked. 

He chuckled, “I don’t mind, but I should go. I’ll check on her tomorrow.”

Luckily, the next morning she felt a little better. Still slightly nauseous, but not nearly as bad. She managed to get a shower, dressed, and scarf some breakfast down and was watching The Da Vinci Code on cable in the living room when she saw a familiar car pull into the driveway. She sighed, feeling her now placated stomach tighten with nervousness as a knock came on the door.

Getting up off the couch, thankful she was dressed and had blow-dried her hair, she opened the door to see Jeremy and smiled awkwardly. “Hey.”

“Hey,” he shifted nervously on his feet. “I, uh, was hoping we could talk?”

Leah nodded, stepping aside to let him in before she went back into the living room, Jeremy following. She sat on the couch and he sat beside her, though kept a comfortable distance. She could tell he was nervous, and she would have been lying if she didn’t say that she was, too. She hadn’t seen or heard from him since their blow-up. It was only weeks prior, but it felt like so much more time had passed considering things with Jacob. 

“You look tired, are you okay?” Jeremy asked.

She nodded, knowing that the bags under her eyes seemingly wouldn’t allow themselves to be covered by concealer. “I just haven’t been feeling the best lately. A lot’s been going on.”

He nodded, realizing that he probably contributed to that, too, and he fell silent again.

“I’m sorry,” she said, breaking the silence. “For everything.”

“No, I’m sorry,” he sighed. “I was mad, and I shouldn’t have come over until I cooled off. At the very least, I should have spoken to you in private, so I apologize. What I did was wrong, no matter the cause.”

Leah sighed, but gave him a small smile. “I think we’re both at fault, so seriously, it’s fine.”

Jeremy averted his gaze away from her and sighed. “I guess you’re not interested in getting involved with someone who has anger management issues, huh?” His tone was teasing, but Leah heard the more serious underlying message.

“Jeremy… I still can’t tell you why I lied to you. It wasn’t to be malicious or deceitful, but it just wasn’t my secret to tell. We’re all very close on the reservation and we watch each other’s backs carefully. Sometimes we… do things that aren’t exactly the right thing to do in efforts to protect the ones we love.”

“I don’t know what any of that means,” he sighed. “But, I’m willing to put my trust in you. Rachel kind of vouched for you, too.”

“She did?”

He nodded, “I guess her boyfriend, Paul, told her what happened, so she came to class early to catch me the day after.”

Leah sighed, hating that so many people had gotten involved with her mess thus far. Granted, it had been weeks ago, and things were much different now. “She didn’t have to do that.”

“No, she didn’t, but I’m glad she did.”

“You are?”

“I want to try this again,” he said, his cool, blue eyes looking into hers. 

Leah gulped back a growing lump in her throat and took a deep breath in. “Jeremy, I-“

“I know, I was a jerk, but I want to move past this, and be truthful going forward – no more lies. If you can’t tell me something, fine, but don’t lie about it.”

Leah contemplated how easy it would be with Jeremy. Uncomplicated. But she didn’t want uncomplicated – she wanted passion, and there was only one guy she could think of that stirred up those emotions – and that was certainly complicated. “I can’t,” she whispered, breaking his gaze and looking down to her hands. “You’re right, as long as there can’t be one hundred percent honesty, it won’t work, and-”

“Is this about Jacob?”

Leah looked back up, brow furrowed. 

“I saw the look in his eyes when he defended you,” he commented. “If you say there wasn’t anything going on between you two when we were together, then I believe you, but I could tell that night that there was something there. I don’t know what it was, or well, is, but I know he cares about you and I can see it on your face, now, too, just by me mentioning him.”

Leah frowned, looking away to the movie playing on the tv. “I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize. I guess we love who we love.”

She turned back to him and sighed, “There wasn’t anything going on when we were together, I swear. But after we broke-up, it kind of just happened…”

Jeremy nodded, realizing there was no further romantic future for them, but still caring about her. “Well, I’m happy for you both.”

“Thanks. It’s still… complicated, but we’re trying to figure it out,” she clarified. 

Jeremy chuckled, “It seems everything about you is complicated.”

“Kind of,” she admitted. “I’m sorry for involving you in my mess.”

“Don’t be. At the very least, crappy break-up lines aside, I really would like to be friends.”

Leah smiled, “I’d like that.”

“And,” he said firmly. “You really should come back to dance. You’re great. I could still get you in the recital.”

“I’ll think about it,” she promised. 

“I should go, I’ve got class soon.” He stood up. “Thanks for talking to me.”

Leah got up and felt her head spin. She immediately reached out to grab the arm of the couch to steady her. 

“Are you okay?” He reached out and grasped her arm to steady her, seeing a familiar look come over her features. 

“Fine, just a little off. I wasn’t feeling well last night, so it’s probably just got to do with being dehydrated or something.”

Jeremy nodded, not wanting to come off too strongly, but having a sneaky suspicion. “Have you seen a doctor?”

She shook her head, “It’s nothing, really.”

He dropped his hand from her arm and nodded. “Mikayla’s mom was really tired, dizzy, and-“

“Jeremy,” Leah said softly, giving him what she hoped was a reassuring smile. “Seriously. I’m fine. Don’t be late for class.”

He hesitated but nodded. “Fine but keep an eye on it.”

“Will do, Dr.”

He smirked and left, hoping he was wrong. Leah retired herself to the couch for the rest of the day to avoid too much movement or anything that may upset her stomach.

She met Emily and Rachel early a few days later for brunch in Seattle. Her mother let her take her SUV since she was on holidays with Charlie all week, and she pulled into the small diner just past 10 AM, seeing Emily’s car already there. Leah got out and went inside, meeting both girls who sat in a booth, Rachel nursing a mimosa and Emily sticking with tea. 

”Hey,” Leah said as she slid into the booth next to Rachel.

The ‘side effects’, as she called them, from phasing were still there and she wasn’t really feeling brunch, but she said she would go and she was really trying to patch her relationship with Emily as best as she could manage. It was time to try to move forward. 

”Hey, how are you feeling?” Emily asked, clearly concerned after their last visit at her house.

”I should be asking you that,” Leah returned easily, gesturing to her belly.

Emily smiled automatically, her hand going to her bump. “It’s going.”

“Do you have the pink paint picked out for the nursery yet?” Leah teased.

“I think we’re going with neutral.”

“Paul is surprised it’s a girl – he bet against me, so I got twenty-bucks,” Rachel smirked. “Said Sam’s Alpha-genes would make a boy to carry out the Uley gene, or something as equally absurd.”

Leah laughed, “Well I’m excited for a little Emily.”

“If there’s any truth to the alpha gene, then you better watch out, Leah,” Emily teased.

“Okay, woah, we’re getting way too far ahead of things right now.”

The girls laughed and a minute later, the waiter came over and took their order. She settled for two eggs and some toast, along with a mimosa, hoping she would be able to keep it down. Her nausea was ever-present, and she hoped that the sugar from the orange juice in the mimosa would help. 

“You’re not yourself,” Rachel said softly as the waiter left the three girls alone “You used to scarf down eight eggs as an appetizer. Are you still not feeling well?”

”It’s probably just my body getting used to the new way of life,” she said, knowing there were other people surrounding them in the diner. 

“None of the other guys are sick,” Rachel said softly. “Maybe it’s time to call Carlisle to… I don’t know, check you out? I know you’re scared it’s… lifestyle related, so maybe Carlisle is the best one to diagnose you?” Being in public sometimes sucked - they had to be so careful about the word choice on their supernatural life. 

Leah shook her head, “It’s really not a huge deal, honestly.”

Emily, who had a feeling Leah was down-playing it, bit her lower lip. She didn’t want to start an argument when they were doing so well, but she was worried. “Alright, fine.”

“Jeremy stopped by the other day,” Leah said finally, changing the subject.

“He did?”

“He wanted to apologize and kind of asked if we could try things again. Obviously, I said no, but we’re going to be friends.” She looked to Rachel. “He said you talked to him after we broke-up?”

“I just wanted to have your back,” she said easily. “Things have kind of changed since, though, considering you’re back to sleeping with my brother.”

Leah laughed and rolled her eyes, “Can we pretend like you don’t know about that?”

“We’re going to have to,” Rachel mused. “Because as much as I do support you now, the thought’s still nauseating.”

It didn’t take long for the waiter to bring by their food, and Leah’s mimosa. The smell didn’t immediately turn her stomach - something she was extremely grateful for. She sipped her mimosa and ate her two eggs quickly, hoping the nausea would stay away until the food settled and even started to nibble on some toast.

When the waiter came back to check-in, Rachel ordered a black coffee and Emily got a refill on her tea. Leah was slowly nursing her mimosa, hoping the sugar would raise her blood sugar to an acceptable level. As soon as the waiter returned with the coffee, though, the smell immediately hit Leah’s nose, causing her to urge. She put her hand over her mouth and took a deep breath in.

”You need to see a doctor, I’m serious, Leah, this-”

Emily was cut off, however, as Leah quickly got up from the table and rushed into the bathroom. So much for breakfast.

When she finally felt that her stomach was empty and the sweat on her forehead dried, she took some deep breaths in, splashed some cold water over her face and swished around some water in her mouth. Well, this went well, she thought idly, before returning to the table. 

Both girls had finished their breakfast. Rachel was up paying for the bill and Emily was shrugging on her jacket as Leah approached. 

Emily frowned as Leah approached. “You look terrible.”

”I feel terrible,” she admitted. “I should just get home.” A queasy stomach wasn’t a sign of death, but well, it was kind of getting annoying.

Unfortunately, Leah got a call around 10 AM the next morning just as she finished urging her stomach to behave on the bathroom floor again. It was Jared. Apparently, Paul had caught a scent of a vampire in the woods behind Sam’s house. Leah, although really wishing she could stay home until the nausea completely subsided, was forced to get up off her bed and grab her coat. Since stopping phasing, she felt all the normal temperature changes of a human, had lost her appetite, heightened temperature, and her sense of hearing. Unfortunately, she could still smell extremely well – which her stomach used to torture her. She called out to Seth, who was on her heels as they left.

When they got outside, she knew the vampire threat would force her to phase - she had no choice. She ran into the woods by her house with Seth and took their regular trees before she took a deep breath in, undressing quickly. She tried to force the familiar shiver in her spine that initiated her phasing. Seth exploded into his wolf quickly and waited for her at the edge of the woods. 

When she didn’t feel it, she started to worry. Not phasing for the past couple of weeks shouldn’t affect her response if there was danger. They could all phase on a dime if required - this should be no different. She tried again, willing her body to explode, taking deep breath in and focusing on her grey wolf alone. 

Unfortunately, it still didn’t work. She tried for another minute, envisioning everything that made her angry - Jacob’s imprint to Renesmee and them in bed together came to her mind quickly, and although the thought felt heavy in her chest, even that didn’t cause the red to flash in her eyes or the chill to go up her back. What the Hell??

”Leah?” Seth had phased back when she was taking so long and came back, avoiding looking at her. 

Leah grabbed her clothes and quickly dressed. “Seth… I can’t phase.”

Seth heard her re-dress with his wolf-hearing and opened his eyes, looking at her. “What do you mean?”

”I tried… my body… it won’t phase.”

”That’s impossible.”

”I can’t, I tried everything…”

”Maybe it’s because you’re sick?”

”I’m fine,” she rolled her eyes quickly. “You go ahead, I’ll run over and meet you-”

”Get on my back,” Seth ran behind a tree, undressed again and phased before coming back to his sister.

Leah hesitated before he crouched down. 

“Grab my fur!”

Leah held on tightly and Seth ran - but not too fast to buck her off, through the trees. It definitely did nothing to help her nausea, but they got to Sam’s quickly and Seth let Leah off before changing back and redressing at the edge of the woods before they met the entire pack in the backyard.

”Why didn’t you run here?” Jacob asked, having seen Seth let her off his back through the trees.

”She’s phased out. Maybe that has something to do with it,” Sam said. 

“Shouldn’t matter in an emergency-”

Leah wasn’t up for arguing and she rolled her eyes, not appreciating him questioning her pack-loyalty in front of everyone. “You think I don’t know that? I can’t phase. I tried everything, including picturing you and that leech in bed together but guess what? 'Nadda.” Maybe taking her stewing anger out on Jacob wasn’t fair, but the words were out of her mouth before she could even think about them and she was extremely tired of feeling sick and tired the past few days, further increasing her irritability. 

“Let’s not do this now,” he said, his voice low, fists balling. “What do you mean you can’t phase?”

”I told you - it isn’t working.”

Sam frowned, “Are you still not feeling well? Emily told me about brunch…”

”You shouldn’t still be sick, you should have called me,” Jacob started before Leah cut him off. He had tried to go see her the next day after dinner to check in but had seen Jeremy’s car in the driveway and decided against it. Rachel had assured him that it had been completely platonic, but it still bothered him. 

“I’m fine.” She crossed her arms. “Can we get to the point here?”

”The scent is gone,” Paul interrupted. “It was fleeting… it belongs to one of the vamps that came to the field New Year’s Eve. I recognize it, but I can’t place who it is. They all smell as equally revolting.”

”What are they doing here?” Leah asked quickly.

”Probably looking for the Cullen’s,” Jared pipped in. “Maybe they didn’t know that they left.”

”Or maybe they know they’re gone and they’re not a fan of the Cullen’s having mingled with wolves,” Paul replied. “And decided to come attempt to rectify the situation now that the Cullen’s have left.”

Suddenly, Leah felt a blast of air, as did the others. Immediately, every wolf except Leah felt the chill up their spines and quickly shredded their clothes, the small clearing behind Sam’s filling with a pack of large wolves - and a familiar face in the brush.

Marcus.

Immediately, Sam and Jacob stood in front of Leah, who felt extremely ill at the vampire’s scent. She thought she may hurl there and then - and she was still standing there, as a human, incompetent to phase. Luckily, she was far enough away that she didn’t get caught in the crossfire of them phasing. She stayed behind Jacob and Sam, Seth off to her side.

”I come in peace,” The ancient vampire put his hands up. “I didn’t realize that I would cause so much concern. I was just passing through to find the Cullen’s.”

”Why did you come through here?” Leah asked strongly, stepping under Jacob to get to the forefront. 

Sam growled her back, knowing she couldn’t defend herself, but Jacob shook his head, knowing he could spring forward in an instant if he had to protect her. She was the only one who could communicate, as a human, and they needed answers. Every wolf was tense; ready for a fight, but it was very clear that there was only one vampire scent - and that was Marcus’, and he seemed nonthreatening right now and extremely outnumbered, age aside.

”I’ve left the volturi guard,” Marcus said strongly, leaning against a tree in attempt to tread cautiously. “I’ve come to see if the Cullen’s would consider a truce with myself, and possibly others.”

”The Cullen’s moved,” Leah said strongly. “I have no idea where,” she looked back to Jacob, taking off her sweater and throwing it to the ground before him since they all shredded their clothes when they phased. She turned back to face the vampires and Jacob phased back, throwing her sweater over his manhood quickly. 

“They’re in Canada,” Jacob said easily, emerging beside Leah. At least they could still put up a united front in the face of danger, even if she couldn’t phase. “I’m not really sure they’ll want you to know where, though. How do we know this isn’t some trick? You’ve been indebted to Aro for… well, ever.”

”Only by force,” Marcus said finally. “I’ve made my decision, and I’d like to warn the Cullen’s that others are making theirs, too.”

”Why did you suddenly leave?” Jacob asked. He had known that Marcus had been joyful for his death in Alice’s vision. Marcus hesitated, which caused Jacob to react. “Now, or we can tear you apart-”

Marcus didn’t look scared, but he sighed. “Jane and Demetri… They have begun a romance. When Aro found out, he asked me to verify their relationship - I have the power to see emotional ties. I confirmed it, and Aro wanted me to keep an eye on it and for Chelsea to break it, if it grew too strong - if their loyalty was stronger for one another than the volturi guard. I let it go on for as long as I was able… Aro kept close tabs on them and demanded once things got very serious between them for me to break the tie. He feared losing them both and everyone could see how smitten they were together. I refused… I barely got out, but not before warning Jane and Demetri. Now that Jane and Demetri realize Aro is going to break them apart, I believe they, too, will be revolting. Possibly more. I need to let the Cullen’s know… and ask them for their mercy.”

Jacob took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “I can call them.”

”I would greatly appreciate that.”

Leah reached down onto the ground, where his phone laid, and passed it to him. He dialed the familiar number. After only one ring, Carlisle answered.

”I’m so sorry, Alice just had a vision, are you all okay?”

”We’re fine,” he said quickly, sighing. He gave them the quick rundown of Marcus’ admission and Carlisle hesitated.

”We’re in Canada - BC.” Carlisle proceeded to tell Jacob their address. “Tell him we will be waiting for him - and only him. I will decide where to go from there.”

Jacob conveyed the message and Marcus thanked them profusely. “I will be on my way - thank you.”

The vampire left quickly, and the wolves stayed phased until they heard him hit the water off the cliffs. Jacob was half torn to follow to ensure Renesmee was safe, but he had more pressing matters here, with Leah - and Renesmee had a lot of lethal forces protecting her already. 

“I’ll get you some clothes,” Leah said quickly, running in to Sam’s house. Emily was there, looking out, a little shaken up from what she saw in the backyard.

”Everything is fine,” Leah said quickly, seeing her alarmed face. “Do you have some clothes I can give them? They all shredded them.”

”Why didn’t you phase?” Emily asked before going over to grab an armful of clothing that she kept in the linen closet for the boys.

Leah took them quickly. “I don’t know, I’ll be back okay?”

She ran out and threw the clothes on the ground between them before going back inside to let them all phase back. 

“How are you feeling?” Emily asked as Leah came back inside. 

“Fine,” she lied easily, not wanting to rehash this again and also fearing if she said too much, she wouldn’t be able to choke back the nausea anymore.

”The bags under your eyes tell me differently and you look kind of green, Lee.”

Her nausea was bad; the scent of the vampires overcame her and wouldn’t leave. She sighed, “I…” Immediately, she turned and grasped the garbage near the back door in the kitchen - right as Jacob and Sam walked through it. 

“Leah!” Jacob exclaimed, looking to Emily.

”She’s still sick?” Paul asked quickly as the rest of the guys flooded through the doors and hung around the kitchen and living room.

Emily frowned, “It appears so. You need to see a doctor.”

”I’m fine,” Leah said finally, tears running down her face. She stayed hovered over the garbage until she felt strong enough to stand up. Emily handed her a cloth and she thanked her, running it over her face quickly. 

“You look a lot less than fine, Lee,” Jacob said softly, worry filling his features. 

“Thanks, Captain Obvious.”

“On another thought, if members of the volturi are breaking apart, that means we may very well have more vampire activity around here if they’re coming to find the Cullen’s,” Paul jumped in, bringing them back to the issue at hand. 

”Jane hates the Cullen’s,” Jacob replied. “If they do break off like Marcus said, they won’t be coming to find them, but increasing the patrols seems like a smart idea in the meantime, at least until we hear from Carlisle again and get some more information. I’ll do a new schedule up later today and increase the patrol numbers.” He turned to Leah, “But right now, we need to talk. Can we go out back? Are you feeling okay enough?”

”I think I’m just going to go home,” she said, feeling her stomach continue to stir. “Let me know if there’s any way I can help, okay?”

“I’ll come over after-“

“I’m fine,” she promised. “I just need some sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He kissed her hair gently, and let her go.

The next day, Leah took the SUV and pulled up to Rachel’s house the early next morning, ready to get today over with but also excited to see Rachel as a bride. Sam dropped Emily over earlier and Leah was the designated driver since her mom was the only one with a vehicle to fit everyone.

Rachel, Billy, Emily, and Jacob came out and piled into the car. Billy had gotten into the front because it had more room and was easier to get in and out of, and the other three got into the back. She was surprised not to see Kim, but Rachel told her she wanted to keep her entourage small – just like they suggested in Say Yes to the Dress, which Rachel had been watching non-stop.

Leah pulled up to the small bridal store and they all got out. Once they got Billy into his wheelchair, Rachel pushed him inside with Emily and Jacob hung back.

“Leah?”

Leah was feeling her familiar morning nausea but tried to ignore it until she got home. “It’s really not a good time.” She turned to go inside, but Jacob reached out and grasped her wrist.

“You avoiding this conversation isn’t going to make me stop bringing it up. You look terrible-“

“Why, thank you, how sweet and romantic.”

“You know what I mean. Let me call Carlisle and ask him to examine you.”

“I’m fine-“

“Where you sick this morning?”

“No,” she said proudly, not attesting to her choking back the nausea currently. Technically she hadn’t been sick, though. Yet, anyways. 

He sighed, “I’m worried about you.”

“Well, worry later – Rachel’s waiting.”

Jacob gave up, knowing she was right, and he sighed as Leah went inside. He took a few deep breaths before going inside himself and sitting down beside his dad. Emily and Leah were following Rachel around who was wide-eyed at the white gowns surrounding them. 

“Are you sure about your choice?” Billy asked, catching him by surprise as they both watched the girls.

“I love her, dad.”

Billy was still unsure how his son could fight his imprint so easily. Well, maybe easily wasn’t the right word. He thought back to his conversation with Sue and sighed. “Just be careful, okay?”

“I will,” Jacob said as the girls started picking dresses for Rachel to try on. 

Billy looked to his son and frowned. He was an adult now and had tough decisions to make. Leah was stubborn – much like his son. As Jacob looked back to the girls, Leah was gone, and Rachel was disappearing into a change room. Emily came back to sit next to Jacob to wait for Rachel and Jacob’s brow furrowed. “Where’s Leah?”

“Not feeling well,” Emily said, frowning. “She just stepped outside for a minute to get some air.”

Jacob got up and went to find Leah. He exited the large, glass double-doors that they just entered and saw her sitting on the steps, her head against the rails, eyes closed. When she heard someone behind her, she looked up and sighed, “Jacob, please, go-“

“I told you, I’m not going anywhere. Let me help.”

“I appreciate your concern, but you really don’t have to be here for this.” She felt her head spin again and she took a deep breath, wiling it to stop. It wasn’t necessarily the first time in the past few days that she felt weak, but it was the first time her head felt like it was spinning. She put her face in her hands, elbows resting on her propped knees. “I hate this,” she groaned. “Why am I the only one that’s sick?”

”I don’t know, Lee,” Jacob sighed, sitting beside her. “Have you told your mom that you’re still sick?” Sue was a nurse, after all. 

“I’ve played it off to her. She’ll worry too much and drag me to emerge. It’ll pass,” she said hopefully, opening her eyes again and looking over at Jacob. Her head was feeling a little better, as was her stomach.

“Are you feeling any better?”

“A little,” she admitted. “We should go back inside.”

“If you’re sick, I can take you home. Rachel will understand.“

“I’m fine, really.” She got up, but she felt the familiar spinning sensation come over her and he reached out to steady her as her empty stomach churned. “Or not,” she said softly, willing herself not to throw up in front of Jacob. She took some deep breaths in as her body got used to being upright again and once the spinning went away again, she felt her stomach sober up again. 

“New Year’s Eve all over again,” he teased, evoking a small smirk from the she-wolf.

“Except not as fun.”

“I can ask my dad if he’s heard of anything like this post-phasing,” he offered.

She nodded and went back in, Jacob following, to sit next to Emily just as Rachel came out in the first gown. Jacob sat by his dad as Rachel beamed. Jake saw the tears in his dad’s eyes and smiled.

“You look beautiful, sis,” Jacob said proudly.

“It finally feels real,” Rachel said, teary-eyed herself. “I can’t believe I’m getting married.”

She was in a ballgown, which suited her tall and lean frame beautifully. It had a sweetheart neckline, a big, flowy skirt of tulle, and rhinestones adorning the top. “It’s beautiful, Rach,” Leah said honestly, feeling a little overcome herself with emotion seeing everyone else choke up. Emily’s pregnancy hormones didn’t allow her to control the tears already streaking her face - happy tears, and Jacob and Billy were staying strong, but both visibly affected. Leah gulped back the lump growing in her own throat, not wanting to make more of a skeptical of herself.

”Is it the one?” Emily asked tentatively. 

Leah thought that if Billy spoke, he would lose all resolve staring at his baby girl. After all, Rebecca had a shotgun wedding, so this was Billy’s first time really getting to be a part of the wedding planning process for one of his children. 

“I want to try on everything,” Rachel said happily. “Something a little more fitted, too.”

Thankfully, the rest of the afternoon went by quickly. It was a little bit of a whirlwind as Rachel tried on dress after dress. The girls laughed, picked out different styles for her, and Jacob and Billy observed peacefully.

”Dad?” Jacob asked as the girls scowered the small shop for another dress. “Leah hasn’t been feeling well - do you think that has anything to do with her stopping phasing?”

Billy’s brow furrowed, and he shrugged, “I don’t know, son. I’ve never heard of anything like it before, but, well, she’s the first female wolf, so it’s hard to say how it will affect her.”

”You mean her… hormones,” Jacob said awkwardly.

”If her body is trying to adjust to being fully human again, then there’s a possibility her hormones are trying to… regulate, I guess, and they can cause some pretty strange things to happen. Has she told Sue?”

”No,” Jacob said, trying to process the information. Likely, Leah already considered that reasoning, but it didn’t sit well with him. “I’ll talk to her after.”

”Sick how?”

”She told me she’s nauseous and lightheaded.”

Billy nodded, his eyes going over to the familiar she-wolf as the girls laughed. “Well, she should tell Sue.”

”I’ll see what I can do,” Jacob said easily. “But she’s so stubborn.”

Billy laughed, “That’s probably why you keep butting heads.”

”I’m not as stubborn as she is,” Jacob argued.

”Whatever you say, son.”

The girls came back and Rachel took another dress into the fitting room. Emily sat beside Jacob, Leah on the other side and he tangled his fingers through hers. When Rachel came out, this time, Leah couldn’t help the tears filling her eyes - and everyone else’s.

”I love it,” Rachel breathed, looking at herself in the mirror.

The ballgown made Rachel look beautiful, but it was almost like she was playing dress up. This dress? She looked like a woman. It was a mermaid style and it hugged her hips perfectly before flaring out at the bottom around her knees. The top had thin, off the shoulder straps, a sweetheart neckline that appropriately covered her chest, a chapel train, and the entire dress was white, with soft embroidery all over, and a frosted glimmer shimmer. It was stunning and had an open-back that focused the beauty of the dress into a slightly sexy number, too. 

“Okay, this is my favorite,” Emily choked out.

”Rachel, you look beautiful,” Billy’s voice was choked up and Jacob smiled, taking a deep breath. 

“My favorite, too,” Jacob added.

Rachel turned to face them, looking at Leah, who had tears on her cheeks like Emily. Extremely rare for Leah to be so emotional, and it caused more tears to spill over. 

“I love it,” Leah replied, misty-eyed. 

Jacob heard the emotion in Leah’s voice and looked over, seeing her wipe away tears. It was nice to see her express herself, but it felt off to Jacob for some reason. He had seen the complete range of Leah’s emotions thus far, but she wasn’t usually one to show her emotions so plainly. 

“I think this is the one,” she said happily.

”How much is it?” Billy asked.

”I have the money,” Rachel assured him.

”I told you already, I’m getting your dress,” Billy protested.

Rachel protested, but Billy ended up getting the dress. The lady measured Rachel and told her it would be six to eight weeks, which considering they still didn’t have a date, was perfectly fine. When Billy and Rachel came back from the counter, Leah and Emily - who had been talking prior, stood up, along with Jacob, and Leah felt the familiar dizziness come over her and immediately sat back down. 

“Are you okay?” Rachel asked, coming over to her. 

“Fine,” she lied. She looked over to Jacob and threw him her keys. “Can you drive?”

”Of course,” he said easily, going over to her to help her up.

She pulled her hand away from his and got back up - slower this time. What the fuck was going on? They all went out to the car after she protested a million times that she was okay, and half-way home, she felt her stomach flip.

”Pull over,” Leah said from the back, head pressed against the glass. 

”We’re almost home,” Jacob said.

”Pull over now or I’m going to throw up in this car.”

Jacob pulled in to the side of the road quickly and Leah got out immediately, shutting the door as she walked behind the car and her stomach urged. Considering she hadn’t eaten all day, her attempts to feel better were futile and the nausea stayed, ever-present, her skin coated with sweat. Jacob got out a minute later and came back. She knelt on the grass and he went over to her. 

“If you won’t let me call Carlisle, I’m taking you to the hospital,” he said finally as she looked up to him. 

“I’m fine, I think it was just motion sickness-”

”Don’t give me that crap,” he said forcefully, finally forcing her into what he had been trying to get her to accept willingly for days. “You need to get checked out. You can be stubborn all you want, but here’s what’s going to happen: I’m going to drop dad, Rach, and Emily off, and then I’m going to ask my dad to schedule a tribal meeting. We can see what they have to say about why you’ve been sick and then decide from there if I should call Carlisle or if your mom can take you to the hospital in Forks.”

“Jacob, seriously, I’m-“

“If you say fine once more, I’m going to vomit,” he tried to joke, evoking an eye roll from the she wolf. “Are you feeling okay enough to get back in the car?”

She nodded and got back in. The rest of the short ride home was extremely quiet save for whatever latest pop song was playing through the radio. Jacob dropped Emily off before driving back to his house.

“I can go home until you arrange this meeting,” Leah said dryly as Rachel got out by her and Jacob helped Billy back into his wheelchair. 

Jacob ignored her and once Billy was situated, turned to her. “Is your mom off?”

“Yeah, still on vacation. Most people would think that meant sandy beaches and sun, but apparently, she’d rather spend her time off at Charlie’s.”

“Call her and tell her to come over to my place in,” he checked his watch. “An hour? I’ll start the fire out behind the house.” It was starting to get dark, but the light and warmth of the fire would keep everyone warm and cozy. It was finally starting to warm up anyways. “I’ll run over to get Sam now and you can stay with Rachel.”

“I’ll call Old Quil,” Billy said helpfully.

“You’re overreacting,” Leah stated unhappily, leaning against the railing of the wheelchair ramp attached to their house.

“Better safe than sorry,” Billy replied warmly, taking her hand to give it a squeeze. “Our legends don’t exactly encompass the female anatomy, so maybe a meeting now that you’re phasing out is a good idea regardless and see where to go from here since you’ve been ill.”

Leah wasn’t about to argue with Billy and was honestly thankful for his help considering she knew he disapproved of her and Jacob’s prior relations. She nodded politely as Rachel ushered her inside with her father. Jacob told them he would be back shortly and ran over to Sam’s.

Once he got to their place, he went inside without knocking, the door unlocked. He called out to Sam, not seeing him in the main kitchen area and he heard laughing coming from the living room before Sam called for him to come inside.

“Hey,” Jacob poked his head into the living room, seeing Sam and Emily both wide-eyed with excitement and happiness, smiles plastered on their faces.

“Do you want to feel the baby kick?” Emily asked softly, Sam’s hand positioned under hers on her stomach. 

Jacob felt rude to decline, so he went over and Emily removed Sam’s hand, putting Jacob’s where it was. It took a second, and Emily moved his hand a little, but he did feel a slight movement under his hand, which surprised him. He pulled his hand back quickly and Emily laughed. “That’s…”

“Exceptional,” Sam beamed, kissing Emily proudly.

“Uh, yeah…” It was a little nauseating feeling her stomach move, if Jacob was being honest. A human being was in there, moving around, and it unnerved him a little at the entire thing – much like it had with Bella. He saw her stomach move frequently, but it still felt crazy that there was a human inside. “Does it hurt?” He had been present during most of Bella’s pregnancy but, well, it wasn’t exactly a normal one and he had to imagine a human pregnancy was a little, well, more normal. 

“Nah,” Emily said easily. “It’s nice, actually. A little weird at first when I was just feeling the flutters, but now that I can feel her it’s nice to know she’s alive and well.”

Sam smiled and put his hand back on her stomach, rubbing it over her shirt before looking back over to Jacob. “What’s up?”

“Uh, yeah, can you come by for a tribal council meeting?” Sam stood in for his absent father, Sue for Harry, his dad, and Old Quil. Jacob would be attending because of his Alpha title and concern for Leah.

“Yeah, no problem, what’s it for?”

“Leah,” Jacob said awkwardly. “Where she’s been sick. She hasn’t been getting better and needs to see a doctor, but we’re unsure if it’s… well, safe, to go to a normal hospital or if I should call Carlisle in. I don’t want to drag the Cullen’s back here though unless it’s necessary, so I want to see what the elders have to say.”

“She wasn’t well earlier,” Emily told her husband. “At the bridal salon.”

“I’m worried about her,” Jacob admitted.

“Alright,” Sam kissed Emily quickly before getting up. “Let’s go.”

Both men got back to Billy’s quickly, seeing Charlie’s cruiser in the driveway. She must have been at the Clearwater’s and not Charlie’s. When he went inside, he saw that Old Quil was already there, too, along with Charlie. He greeted everyone quickly before they all piled out back, around the fire pit. Sam assisted him in starting the fire and Sue held onto Leah’s hand as they sat on the log – Rachel and Paul tucked away inside with Charlie.

“Thank you all for coming,” Jacob said, standing in front of everyone. Jacob gave them a quick run down of Leah’s inability to phase and her symptoms thus far that he was aware of and how he worried about her health considering her pack involvement.

“I’ve had some lower back pain, too,” Leah added onto the end as Jacob summed up the events the past few weeks. “And I’m tired a lot, but it’s probably nothing.”

“Why didn’t you tell me that you were still sick?” Sue asked, turning to her daughter.

“I just thought it was a bug, but it’s been about a week now and it’s only gotten worse.”

Old Quil took the information in quietly, hearing it, like Sue, for the first time. Billy and Sam knew a little of what was going on up until now, but Billy had few resources to go on about why Leah was sick other than his speculation to his son earlier and Sam was hoping it would pass on it’s own.

“Dehydration can cause the exhaustion and dizziness since you’ve been so sick,” Sam stated, taking in her appearance, trying to be helpful. 

“Are you thirstier than normal?” Sue asked. “Decreased, colorful urination? 

“Mom,” Leah groaned, not really wanting her entire medical history on display.

“We’re here to help, Leah,” Sue insisted.

“A little thirstier, but it’s probably only because I’ve been so sick. No to the rest.”

“She may be a little dehydrated,” Sue spoke. “But I don’t think it’s anything critical. I’d probably just put it off to the vomiting. As for that, I’d need a blood work panel to see if your white counts are elevated to confirm or rule out a stomach virus.”

“I feel good sometimes, though,” Leah said to her mom. “The nausea… it’s not like… a stomach flu. If it was, it’d be gone by now, right? It’s not there all the time. Some days I feel fine, and other times it won’t go away at all.”

“It could be hormonal,” Billy supplied, thinking back to his conversation with Jacob earlier that day. “Where she stopped phasing. Maybe her body is returning to normal?”

“It’s possible,” Sue confirmed. “Hormones can be… quite unpredictable. If your levels are off, they can make you sick, and if everything is going back to normal since stopping your phasing, they probably aren’t in regulated levels. Again, I’d need blood work to check.”

“Which brings me back,” Jacob said. “To the question of, do we think it’s safe for her to go to a human hospital, considering this started once she stopped phasing, or will I call Carlisle and let the pack know to expect him?” He thought he may be preoccupied with Marcus, but well, he didn’t have any other options here. He had already communicated Marcus’ presence to the elders to notify them and Carlisle had let him know that Marcus was staying with them for a while and if he had any more information he would communicate it – Alice was watching all of the volturi’s decisions closely.

Old Quil hesitated as a knowing look spread across his face. “I’m not sure if the question is correct, Jacob. Did this start when she stopped phasing, or did she stop phasing because of this?” He hesitated and continued, “Call Carlisle to get the blood work done. Whatever comes back then, we can investigate further, but I… I’ve had some dreams lately. Weird, weird dreams. I thought I understood why, but now…”

“What kind of dream?” Sam asked, turning to Old Quil.

He waved it off, “Nothing to alarm you. Get the blood work done, and we can go from there.”

”One other thing,” Jacob said uneasily. “Leah and I spoke to Carlisle before he left-”

”Jacob, this really isn’t the time,” Leah groaned.

He ignored her and continued, “It’s common knowledge that Leah and I have feelings for one another, and how those feelings emerged, but… Leah approached me about the sporadic intensity of our connection before the Cullen’s left. Carlisle did some research for us, because she was insistent that there was something… off about it.”

Billy looked confused - and annoyed that his son had went to a vampire for help and not him, but he listened idly. Sue had a knowing look on her face, but was focused on Jacob’s words and Sam, having known Carlisle’s findings already, really didn’t want to re-hear it considering it was his ex. Old Quil, however, looked genuinely intrigued. 

“I’d like to… well, keep Leah and I’s interactions private, but the packs involvement of this is too big to ignore.”

”How is you and Leah caring for one another relevant to the pack?” Billy asked finally, mirroring Paul’s speculation before. “And how did the vamp figure it out?”

”It’s just a theory,” Jacob said quickly, feeling as awkward as Leah felt. “But, Carlisle believes that Leah and myself became involved because of, uh, more primal reactions; because I’m the rightful Alpha male and she’s the Alpha female.”

Sue’s brow furrowed and she finally spoke, “You’re saying you and my daughter are involved because of your wolves?”

Jacob shifted uncomfortably under Sue’s gaze, but Old Quil was the one who spoke. “Continue, child, I’d like to hear more about this.”

Jacob nodded, and he sighed, rubbing the back of his neck as he avoided their gazes - which felt penetrating. “Carlisle said only the Alpha male and female traditionally mate in a pack. With our primal natures, that… sense of duty called to one another, even though pregnancy wasn’t an option because of Leah’s human traits. Carlisle believes that’s why I’m able to fight my imprint and why we began a physical involvement in the first place. He believes our pull to each other - to extend the packs roots, is an opening to nullify an imprint. Because of our humanity, though, our emotions also got tied in on a less-primal level.”

Billy sighed, “Carlisle may be a good doctor, Jacob, but this is a stretch.”

”You haven’t felt it,” Leah finally spoke up in a small voice. “It’s… like an imprint, but not. There’s this strong pull, or well, was.”

”Was?”

Jacob sighed, “The mating season for wolves starts in January - right when Leah and I… well, it ends around this time of year. It primarily occurs in female wolves, so Carlisle’s assuming it’s over now because Leah doesn’t feel the same intensity anymore.”

”When did you stop feeling this?” Old Quil asked.

Leah felt like she wanted to curl up into a ball and she sighed, “About three weeks ago.”

Old Quil nodded speculatively, trying to piece it all together. “Have you phased since?”

“No.”

”It’s awkward,” Jacob said suddenly. “Obviously, but if more female wolves phase in the future and there’s merit to Carlisle’s claims, which I believe there is, the pack and the legends must pass down the Alpha male and female’s connection for future knowledge so that they’re not… unprepared.”

”There’s no worry of that,” Old Quil said finally. “Trust me. Go get the blood work done and when you’re aware of the results, let’s call another meeting. We should all sit on this information, do some research ourselves, and try to come to our own conclusions but I believe Leah’s blood work will prepare us more in coming to those conclusions. Carlisle is the safer option for now, until we know the entirety of this situation.”

Everyone was a little concerned, but all got up and Old Quil went over to Leah before they all dispersed and took her hand. Billy was talking to Jacob and Sam to Sue. “Child… you’ve got a special gift.”

“What?”

“I thought it was meant for someone else, but I was wrong. You’re going to provide an extraordinary strength to the pack. Your blood… The spirit in you, it’s going to be incredible.”

“My blood?” Leah asked.

Old Quil gave her a knowing smile and kissed her forehead. “Prepare for a difficult, but joyful journey - a wonderful legacy.” With that, he walked away, and Leah was more confused than ever. Unfortunately, she had little time to process when Jacob and her mom came over, Sam wheeling Billy back inside.

Leah was immediately concerned when she saw the look on her mom’s face, “What’s wrong?”

Sue ignored her daughter momentarily, “Jacob, can you call Carlisle now? Sam will communicate Carlisle’s return with the pack. In the meantime, I think both of you should come back to the house.”

“What’s going on?” Leah asked again, clearly unnerved by her mom’s face – it looked like she had seen a ghost.

“Just call Carlisle and get in the car,” Sue said finally. “I’ll go start it.”

Jacob’s brow furrowed, “Your mom was acting weird.”

“You’re telling me.”

He shrugged, “She’s worried. So am I.”

Jacob took out his phone and called Carlisle. The older vampire obliged to his ask, stating that he would be there within the hour. Leah and Jacob got into her mom’s SUV and Charlie left in his cruiser. Leah got in the front, and Jacob in the back.

“We should go to the Cullen’s,” Jacob said as Sue started toward her house. “Carlisle said he would be there in about an hour.”

“I think we need to go back to the house first,” she stated simply, turning to Leah. “What else have you been experiencing?” 

“I told you, just nausea, my back, and the dizziness.”

“Have you noticed any physical changes? Anything weird with your period?”

“Mom!”

“I need to know,” Sue said fiercely. 

It occurred to her that, as a nurse, there was nothing that she hadn’t heard before and her awkwardness on the topic was unfounded in her mother’s eyes, but that didn’t mean Jacob had to hear it, too. She flushed a little before answering, kind of wishing she made him stay home now.

“I haven’t gotten a period,” she said awkwardly. “Not since I phased. I… well, I bled a little bit a few weeks ago but it was probably nothing; just the hormones unbalanced. It only lasted a day or so, just some minor spotting.” It was no use trying to keep her voice down, Jacob would hear everything anyways.

Sue continued driving, clearly worried about her daughter. She wished she was in the loop before now - as usual, and now that she was, she couldn’t help the overwhelming clarity she had. The others didn’t connect it – didn’t suspect it, but she had. At least everyone beside Old Quil, because he had warned her before she left about Leah being fragile. She had already put two and two together before that, but his words had solidified her assumption. She had been a healthcare practitioner too long to avoid the obvious answer to things, no matter how plausible, and this? It was definitely plausible. “No other typical menstruation symptoms?”

“Just the sore back, and well, uh, my…”

“Leah,” Sue sighed, exasperated.

“My boobs are really sore, okay, happy?”

Sue looked over at her daughter for a moment before turning her attention back on the road. She didn’t say anything else and the short car ride felt extremely long considering her mom’s weird behavior. If she didn’t already feel sick, she definitely did now. Her original nausea accompanied by nerves.

They finally got to the Clearwater’s. Seth was out with Abigail and Sue was grateful for the empty house. They went inside after Sue grabbed the medical kit that she kept in the trunk of the SUV, and she told them to sit in the living room. Jacob and Sue both sat beside Leah, and Sue opened the medical kit, going through it, clearly looking for something.

”You’re scaring me, mom,” Leah finally said. Instinctively, Jacob reached over to take Leah’s hand to try to soothe her. Sue took a deep breath in, trying to find the resolve. “Please tell me what’s going on?”

“What did Old Quil say to you?” Sue asked softly, knowing he had a strong connection to the Gods – or so he thought. 

“He said the spirit in me… it was going to further the pack or something, why?”

Sue frowned and looked between her daughter and Jacob, feeling both unease and awkwardness rise in her chest. She should have asked Billy to come, but she didn’t want to alarm him if she was incorrect - but was almost certain that she was. Likewise, she was thankful that she had turned down Sam’s request to come with them to the Cullen’s for back-up. This was going to be a whirlwind evening and they didn’t need anymore of an audience than what was necessary. “I have a question to ask you both, but I think I already know the answer.” Leah and Jacob shared an uneasy glance before Sue took a deep breath. “Were you safe?”

“Safe?” Leah asked, confused. 

“Did you use any kind of birth control when you were together?” Sue rephrased. She had gotten Leah’s birth control prescription refilled, as she promised, but it was still in her purse.

When Leah failed to find words, Jacob’s face fell, “No.” After all, the pull out method wasn’t a real method and although the thought came to his mind immediately as a nervous reaction, he figured a simple no would suffice.

Sue gulped back the growing lump in her throat and reached down, into her kit, taking out a small, white stick from a bag with others. She worked a lot in the women’s health clinic and ended up adding pregnancy tests to her collection of medical supplies. “Take this.” 

“Mom…” Leah said uneasily, her heart pounding now. “I’m not-“

“I think you are,” Sue said softly. “When did you bleed?” Leah still couldn’t piece together a sentence. Sue had put the stick in her hand, but she felt ill. “Leah?” She prompted.

Leah felt like a deer in headlights, but she shook her head. “Three weeks ago.”

“Were you intimate then?”

Leah nodded deftly, remembering back to the night she told Jacob about her feelings and the spotting that happened afterwards, and Sue sighed. “Go in the bathroom and take it. We can do blood work after, but this will give us much quicker results. I wanted to give you the option to find out here before being blindsided with Carlisle.”

Leah’s limbs felt like they weighed a ton and she avoided Jacob’s face as she got up and disappeared into the bathroom on the main level of the house. She looked at the white stick and took a deep breath before taking it. She remembered doing it once before - when she was eighteen and her and Sam had unprotected sex at a high school party. It was super dumb at the time, but they were so in love and she really didn’t care if she had gotten pregnant - they were destined to be together and talked about marriage and kids all the time. It would have been reckless and irresponsible, but they would have made it work – or so she thought at the time, anyways. 

Her period had only been a day late, but she was both worried and a little excited at the thought, so she asked one of her older friends at the time to get her a test. It had been negative - rightly so, in hindsight, but she had still been a little disappointed. Now, she was just positive that it would be negative, just like then and although she desperately wanted the opportunity to have kids someday, she knew this, like the first time she was in this position, was not the right time.

She placed the stick on the counter and washed her hands, looking at herself in the mirror. She had large bags under her eyes from not sleeping well. She also looked clammy, feeling her nausea come back - but this time, it was because of her nerves. There was no way she was pregnant. She wasn’t sure how much time passed, but she finally took a deep breath and looked down. She could barely comprehend anything. 

Two very strong, very visible, pink lines. 

Positive. 

She was pregnant.


	16. Unsteady

Leah felt so sick that she thought that she may throw up again. She put a hand over her mouth as tears welled in her eyes. She didn’t know how to feel. A part of her was excited that she wasn’t a genetic dead-end, but the majority felt terrified. She was in the worst situation ever to bring a baby into the world. This wasn’t happening. She couldn’t be pregnant with Jacob Black’s baby. Not when he didn’t finish high school, she didn’t have any post-secondary education, neither of them had a job, and they both still lived at home – not to even mention their recent rocky relationship status considering they had only just finally solidified themselves as a couple.

“Leah?” She heard a knock on the door, not realizing how much time had passed. “Are you okay?” 

“I’ll be out in a minute,” she choked out. She inhaled sharply, trying to calm her pounding heart and uneasy stomach.

Her mom didn’t say anything else, but Leah opened the door a few moments later, and she went back out into the living room. She didn’t have to ask; she could tell by Leah’s face that she was right - and that she needed her mom.

Sue went over to her daughter, hugging her tightly, wishing she hadn’t of been right. She rubbed her back as Leah pressed her face into her mom’s shoulder. She felt like she should cry, but there were no tears - just shock and confusion. “How did I let this happen??” She said, to no one, but hearing her mom reply anyways. 

“It’s going to be okay,” she said, looking down to the test in Leah’s hand as she held her, confirming her suspicion of two, pink lines. 

Whether the words were true or not, she wasn’t sure, but she suddenly heard the front door open and close and looked and Jacob was gone. Leah went to move - to find him, but Sue shook her head.

“Just sit down and breathe, okay? I’ll go talk to him.”

Leah obliged, still feeling as though this was an out of body experience - only barely capable of recognizing Jacob’s own shock through her own. He hadn't needed to see the stick when he saw the look on Leah's face upon emerging from the bathroom – he knew it was true; she was pregnant.

Sue found him on the patio, both hands clutching the wooden railing, shoulders slumped, eyes closed, head tilted toward the ground. “Jacob?”

”I’m so sorry, Sue,” he said finally, unable to look at her - he had gotten her daughter knocked up, after all. 

Sue reached out to place a hand on his shoulder, but he didn’t move, and she frowned. “It’s okay, there’s nothing to be sorry for.”

”Seriously?” Jacob finally turned to face her; his eyes filled with confliction. “My dad literally gave me condoms, and I was too stupid to use them.” His head was reeling with the news that it was hard to really consider what he was saying through his obvious state of shock. 

“What’s done is done,” she said as Jacob turned away from her, pacing the small wooden deck. Her feelings right now were insignificant compared to the two, scared kids before her, who had just realized they were having a baby in less than ideal circumstances. Did Sue endorse it? No, but it was already done - there was nothing she could say to turn back time, but in hindsight, she did wish desperately that she had of pushed the birth control issue back when she found out about their activities. At the time, she assumed Leah would make the right decisions - and well, her body wasn’t supposed to be able to change while phasing, but that was a moot point now.

“Can you tell her that I’ll be back inside in a second?” Jacob asked, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I need a minute.” It had felt like the Clearwater's living room was closing in moments ago and he couldn’t breathe - he needed fresh air. He was stricken with guilt and shock and his body reacted accordingly. Pregnant. No, Leah couldn’t be pregnant, right? Maybe the test was faulty. 

”I’m going to stay with you, if that’s okay?” Sue asked, knowing there was a war waging in Jacob’s mind. “Would you like me to call Billy?”

”No,” he said strongly. “I don’t want to deal with him right now.”

Sue nodded understandingly but sighed. “He’s your dad. He isn’t going to-”

”I need to be with her,” Jacob cut her off, unable to process anything expect the immediate concern at hand. “I just… What am I even supposed to say?”

He leaned against the railing and sighed, feeling defeated. He couldn’t find the words to comfort Leah if he couldn’t find them for himself, right? He didn’t know what he could say now to fix this or put her mind at-ease over the whole situation. She was going to hate him - especially after everything they’d been through the past few weeks. And now, he had gotten her pregnant. They were a bad soap opera.

Sue went over beside him and reached over, taking his hand. Jacob wouldn’t meet her gaze, and she frowned, knowing her own feelings in this moment needed to come last to her daughter and Jacob’s. “You don’t have to say anything. Just be there for her. She’s going to need you, Jacob. I know that you both love each other. Focus on that - on being there for each other, and you’ll get through this, I promise.” Jacob didn’t seem too convinced, though, and Sue sighed.  
“When I got pregnant with Leah, Harry and I were newlyweds. We planned it, but I was still terrified. When I told Harry how scared I was, he took my hands, looked me in the eye and told me that we were a team and we could get through anything – and that we would be good parents because we had to be and that he would never abandon his family.” Jacob finally met her gaze and watched her tentatively, knowing it must be hard to talk about Harry, but knowing that she was trying to reassure him. Admittedly, he had a fleeting thought of being glad Harry wasn’t there because Lord knows he would already have his hunting rifle out and ready to go. Jacob was fast, but Harry had always been a good shot. Sue continued, breaking him out of his inner monologue.  
“I knew that he was just as scared as I was, but just something as simple as telling me we were in this together helped significantly. It turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to us, of course, but I still remember how scared and uncertain I was. Even with Seth, I was still scared. Babies are scary, whether they’re planned or not. If you weren’t scared, I think I’d be even more worried, but you both have such a strong support system.”

Jacob felt his confliction break and he nodded. “Thank you, Sue.”

Sue reached out and placed her hands on his shoulders before she pulled him into a motherly embrace. Without his mom around, Sue always felt a little more responsible to be a strong womanly presence in his and the twin’s lives – much like Billy tried to do for her kids once Harry passed. They had always been a family, but well, now there would be more of a solidifying bloodline between the Black and Clearwater roots. She knew that Jacob was a good man and that he loved her daughter. Likewise, Harry would be proud of Jacob as a suitor to Leah – he had always loved Jacob, and that made Sue's heart swell. They still had a lot to work through, but her freaking out right now wasn't going to help the situation – though she was on the inside. Jacob took a deep breath and hugged her back, wishing this was all a dream and he didn’t have to go in and face Leah’s wrath next, but he had to man up. 

He pulled back and took another deep breath, letting it out slowly before he walked toward the door, Sue following suit, and he was once again faced with Leah.

She was on the couch, clutching the small white stick between her index finger and thumb, studying it, tears still in her eyes but not spilling over. She only looked up when the door opened to see if Jacob had come back - and felt relieved when he had.  
He went over to her slowly, preparing for her to yell at him. “Lee…”

”I’m going to give you both some time,” Sue said before slipping back out of the room, to deal with her own feelings, trying to be strong in front of the kids and give them some privacy to talk. As a mother, she realized how unequipped her daughter and Jacob were to deal with this. Unfortunately, babies always seemed to come at the most unexpected time, and this was definitely that, but she had faith that they would figure things out.

“I’m sorry,” Leah choked out. 

“That’s my line,” Jacob tried to joke, but his voice was deadpanned. Admittedly, he hadn’t been expecting an apology from her; she had nothing to apologize for.

“I didn’t think…”

“I know. Me either.”

He sat beside her on the couch, trying to test out how she was feeling, finally deciding anger may not be high up on her emotional gauge right now. He slowly reached over and took her hand, lacing his fingers through hers. When she didn’t pull away, he sighed, relieved. 

“What are we going to do. We can’t do this…”

Jacob, taking Sue’s advice, squeezed her hand. “We’ll figure it out. Together.”

He looked down to her stomach, but much like when he found out Emily was pregnant – it looked the same, unchanged, despite a human growing inside of her. Jacob stood up, pacing the room, barely able to stay still. A baby; his baby; their baby. Although he hadn’t felt much emotion when he found out Emily was pregnant and saw her flat tummy, Leah being pregnant hit him like a transport truck, belly or not. The only thing he could even think to tell her was how sorry he was, and he could barely deny the sick feeling building in his own stomach at the news. He was the reason she was so sick; she was housing his child. No, this had to be some sick joke. He had to be dreaming.

Jacob looked over to Leah again and saw her watching him, blinking back more unshed tears, he knew he had to be a man now. He finally went back to sit by her and take her hand, though every muscle in his body felt like bolting. He thought becoming Alpha was his defining moment, but he felt it with every inch of his body – this was it. This was his paradigm shift. He met her eyes, her waterline filling up with more tears. She tried to blink them away, but as she saw the terror in his eyes, too, she felt a couple slip down her cheeks and she released his hand and wiped them away quickly with the hand not clutching the stick that was about to change their lives forever.

“Don’t cry,” he said softly, feeling his own eyes welling up. He was too young to be a father; only seventeen. Despite his heightened maturity because of his Alpha title and being thrown into shapeshifting and a supernatural world so young, he felt childish right now – young and scared. He still lived in Billy’s house and teased his sister. He could barely figure out how he was feeling a few weeks ago and now, just after realizing, Leah was pregnant. Talk about zero to sixty. This was the inevitable catch-22 that he imagined the night of Sam and Emily’s wedding when he chose to be with Leah and he was right that it not only affected him, but also everyone in his life, including Renesmee.

He pushed Renesmee from his mind, though, trying to focus on the scared girl before him. A few more tears slipped down her cheeks and Jacob reached up to cup her cheek in his hand, wiping them away with his thumb. “You’re going to be okay, alright? I love you.” He loved her - he had chosen her, and he knew in that moment that he would for the rest of his life, from thereon out, love her and only her. Imprinting had been a powerful force; an undeniable one. But finding out you’re going to be a father? Unimaginable. He didn’t fall to his knees like he did when he imprinted, but his entire body filled with this terrified bliss that he had never experienced before. A baby. They were having a baby.

Leah could barely formulate words – mainly because her body was still trying to process the shock. “This can’t be happening.”

Jacob took a deep breath and tried to choke the bile in his own throat back. Right now, he was terrified, but it wasn’t about him in that moment. He was scared, but Leah? The look on her face made his chest tighten. She still held the white stick in her hand and Jacob finally saw the two, strong lines, and felt like were mocking him at this point. Suddenly, she reached up and put a hand on her stomach. There was absolutely no visible signs, as Jacob previously noted, and Leah didn’t feel any physical change, but it felt like her entire body was housing something that she was unable to fully comprehend at the moment; she was a vessel for life.

A minute later, Jacob’s phone rang and he answered it instinctively.

”I’m about twenty minutes away, do you want to meet me at the mansion?”

”We’ll be there,” Jacob hung up the phone as Sue stuck her head out.

“Do we have to go?” Leah said finally, looking up to her mom’s face as she grabbed her coat.

”It’s not safe to go anywhere else,” Sue said. “Not until we know… well, how this works. What you said earlier… about the attraction you felt toward Jacob, and how it disappeared? If it’s correct what Carlisle said, maybe it had less to do about some kind of mating season ending and more to do with the fact that the night before was the night that you actually got pregnant, but you shouldn’t be symptomatic yet if it was only three weeks ago. We need bloodwork to see how far along you are.”

“Can’t a Clearblue test tell me that?” She asked. “I really don’t want to deal with the vampires right now. The smell makes me sick,” Leah blurted.

“I’ll get Carlisle to open the windows,” Jacob promised.

Begrudgingly, she nodded and got back out into the car mechanically. It felt like a dream. No, this wasn’t real. It couldn’t be. She watched as familiar homes and trees passed out the car window, everyone quiet, lost in their thoughts, and suddenly, she started laughing - and couldn’t stop.

”I’m glad you find this amusing,” Sue said quietly as she drove.

Leah could barely stop laughing long enough to get words out, but she managed, “This is just a dream.”

Sue frowned, realizing Leah was still in shock - rightly so. “It’s going to be a very real dream soon enough.”

Jacob stayed quiet in the back, not knowing what to say and kind of freaking out himself now that Leah couldn’t see his face. They pulled up to the Cullen’s finally and Jacob got out, seeing Carlisle’s vehicle in the driveway. Sue and Leah got out, too, reminding herself to breathe through her mouth and not her nose, and Jacob took her hand again as if he was trying to prove to her how annoyingly monogamous that he could be with her. She kind of felt soothed by his presence, though, so she didn’t mind, and they went inside. Even with her mouth-breathing technique, Leah caught the scent right away and really tried to block it out.

When they got inside, Carlisle emerged from his study, Edward and Alice also coming out of the study with Renesmee in tow. Lovely. Leah almost turned to leave, but Jacob held her hand tighter. The last thing she needed was to see Renesmee right now.

”Ness? Can you give us some privacy?” Edward asked. “I promise you’ll get to see Jacob after.”

”I’m sorry,” said apologized. “I know you’re not feeling well, I just… well, thought it would be a good chance to come and soothe the imprint.”

”That’s all, huh?” Leah grumbled.

Jacob sighed, running his free hand through his hair. He looked down to Leah, the vampire’s eyes on them, and he squeezed her hand. “I’m here with you, for you, okay?”

She rolled her eyes, only vaguely aware of her distaste of Renesmee with everything else going through her mind and the smell making her stomach turn. “I need some fresh air.”

”Get her in my study, I have the door open, there’s a nice breeze.” Edward, Alice, and Renesmee went into the living room, Edward giving Jacob a knowing glance that he ignored.

Leah breathed painfully slow through her mouth, trying to focus on not throwing up on the Cullen’s white-tiled floor as Jacob led her into the study. Sue followed and met Carlisle outside the door before handing him the small, white test with two pink lines in a plastic bag. “I’m worried,” she said gently. “If there’s something… supernatural about this, I can’t take her to my work. Thank you for coming back to see her.”

Carlisle stared at the small test for a moment before giving Sue a convincing smile. “We’ll take care of her.”

Carlisle and Sue entered the room, shutting the door behind them for some privacy even though it was kind of pointless considering the vampires hearing. Jacob had led Leah over to the stretcher that was there from when Bella was pregnant and she got up, appreciating the air flowing in from the open door and the ceiling fan above. At least the smell was bearable. 

“Why are they all here?” Leah asked.

Carlisle approached her, trying to make her at-ease. “I thought that Edward may be able to help me diagnose you - and Alice, of course. I didn’t realize you were already, well, aware of what was going on. I apologize for springing Renesmee on you, we just thought it would be a quick visit to satisfy the imprint.” Leah nodded deftly as Carlisle shared a glance with Jacob, who looked a little nauseous himself and tried to give him a reassuring smile. Well, this was a change of events for sure. “I’m going to hang some IV-fluids and anti-nausea medication first, if that’s okay? It will make you feel better very quickly.”

Leah nodded, needing some relief from her nauseous stomach and some nutrients. Carlisle did it very quickly, and then came back with a syringe. “I need to take some blood, if you’re okay with that?” He knew Leah was very skeptical of them, regardless of the protector role that she filled before. 

Again, Leah nodded. The fluids going into her veins actually soothed her, and Carlisle took three vials of blood while she focused on the coolness of the IV fluids entering her body and trying not to throw up or think of Renesmee’s face.

”I’ve got a machine that can register your blood work very quickly,” he said, going over to the long desk on the opposite side of the room. “It’ll be about ten minutes. Would you like anything in the meantime?”

Leah shook her head, “I’m fine.”

”Me, too,” Jacob said as Carlisle left.

”Can I speak with you Sue?”

She nodded, trusting Carlisle since they worked together before and knew he wasn’t a vampire to be feared - by her, anyways. She went out into the hall with him and down into another room, answering some routine questions about what she knew about Leah’s symptoms.

“I’m sorry for Renesmee, I wasn’t aware that she would be here.”

”You can go talk to her if you want. Then when this is over, we can go.”

”I’m not leaving you.”

”As much as I hate it, I know the imprint needs to be satisfied. Go spend the next ten minutes with her, I’ll be fine.” 

Jacob didn’t know if it was a test or not, but he sighed, and leaned down, kissing her forehead. “I’ll just be outside, okay?”

Leah laid back, needing a moment to herself and when she heard the door shut, she felt a sob escape her lips. This entire thing felt more and more real with every passing second. What had they gotten themselves into?

Jacob found Renesmee in the living room. Alice was beside her, holding her hand, and Jacob knew that she already knew. Supernatural hearing wasn’t forgiving, and he could hear Sue and Carlisle talking about it with his increased hearing from down the hall. “Ness, can we talk?”

Renesmee met his gaze sadly and nodded, getting up from beside her aunt as Jacob led her out of the house and into a familiar rock in the woods. It was night, but with their heightened senses, it wasn’t an issue to push through the trees quickly. Admittedly, Jacob felt the fresh air was extremely refreshing right now.  
“Pregnant,” Renesmee said the word nervously as she leaned against a nearby tree.

“I’m sorry-“

“This changes everything,” she cut him off. “I knew when I left that I pushed you toward Leah, I just… didn’t think you’d become so serious so quickly. I definitely didn’t expect a baby. I guess a part of me thought if I let you explore things with Leah, someday you’d come back to me. Don’t get me wrong, that wasn’t my motivation – I stand by my decision to have let you go and for you to be happy I just…”

“Thought I’d realize at some point that it was you?”

“It was wishful, but yeah,” she said softly, avoiding his gaze.

He didn’t realize how honestly heartbroken Renesmee had been over him choosing Leah until now, and he felt terrible. Terrible for being the reason Leah was scared, sick, and confused. Terrible for hurting Renesmee, especially when he had been blind to her true hope of him someday changing his mind. Terrible that he had ultimately thrown all their lives into an unknown, scary place just to avoid using a condom. “Renesmee, this is killing me.”

“I know,” she said softly, her own pain showing on her face. “I’m sorry, I really am. This is unfair of me, I just… I thought Leah had a flu or… was, I don’t know, suffering from some weird phasing side effect when I agreed to come. Her having your baby didn’t cross my mind,” her voice broke, tears visible in her eyes.

It crossed his mind that although he felt the pull to comfort Renesmee as his imprint, he felt like he wasn’t supposed to be doing this with her right now. There were still so many unanswered questions, and Leah needed him. Jacob reached out to put a hand on her shoulder, but she stepped back, away from him, seeing the confliction in his eyes. “I get it. Go be with her. She needs you more than I do right now.”

“Can we talk later?”

She nodded, “Come get me before you go.”

He nodded, but hesitated before leaving her in the woods, alone. He figured she needed a minute, but he had somewhere else to be right now. He went back into the room where Leah was, looking at the clock. It was just under ten minutes, and she was still alone, tears streaking her face and she hastily reached up to wipe them away as he came in, trying to soothe her labored breathing.

“Leah,” he breathed, feeling terrible for leaving her seeing how upset she was. This was going to be a roller coaster of emotion and they needed to be a rock for the other.

“I’m fine,” she said, trying to be strong as her voice wavered. 

He went over to her and sat on the bed beside her. The top of the bed was inclined so she could sit upright and immediately, he pulled her against his chest as more tears sprang to her eyes. As bad as he felt for Renesmee moments ago, it didn’t compare to how much his heart was breaking seeing Leah cry – again, because of him.

His hands ran gently up and down her back and he held her tightly until she stopped crying. He pulled back, resting his forehead against hers. They were quite for a long moment before she broke it, “She knows?”

Jacob hesitated and looked into her eyes, “Yeah – vamp hearing is pretty good, too. Not as good as ours, of course,” he said, trying to lighten the mood.

She sighed, “What did she say?”

“Honestly, we didn’t really get into it. She’s hurt, but she understands that I need to be with you and that you’re my priority. I promised we’d talk before we leave, but only if you’re okay.”

Leah gave him a small smile, and hugged him tightly, burying her face into the crook of his neck. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

The door opened then, and they pulled back as Carlisle and her mom came back, wheeling a machine in behind them.

“Your hCG levels are certainly elevated,” Carlisle said as he set up the machine. “That’s the hormone responsible for pregnancy - and your morning sickness. I’m going to use the ultrasound to compare it with your hCG levels to determine how far along you are and make sure everything is alright.” 

Jacob stayed beside Leah, taking her hand in his. Leah laid back once Carlisle got there and Sue stepped back so that she could see the monitor. Jacob watched intently as Carlisle lifted Leah’s tank top and put the blue goo on her he watched him do with Bella – when she was pregnant on Renesmee.

After a couple moments of moving the small wand over her tiny abdomen, Carlisle found the heartbeat – and the shape of a very small seahorse appeared on the screen and he smiled, “A healthy baby – a good, strong heartbeat.” 

Jacob studied the small image on the screen. He tried to take in every detail as Carlisle moved the small wand to try and get a better picture. He felt like he couldn’t breathe in the tiny room and as the fresh air from outside blew through the open area, he took a deep breath to refill his deflated lungs. 

Leah didn’t know what to say as more tears fell from her eyes. She always imagined this day much differently – with a different man, and her fear only amplified. She always wanted to be a mom; she and Emily used to talk about it all the time, but she never thought when it happened, she would be this scared and uncertain. 

Carlisle let them linger on the picture and the sound of the heartbeat for a little longer before turning off the machine, cleaning off the gel, and printing off two sheets of three, tiny black and white images for them. Her mom’s eyes were filled with tears seeing her grandchild for the first time, but Leah’s attention was pulled back to Carlisle when he started talking.

“It seems like you’re pretty close to six weeks along. Does that sound accurate?” Carlisle looked between the two. “It would put conception roughly around February 20 and make you due early December.”

Leah hesitated, and shook her head. “No, that’s not right.” Jacob was just about to jump on the same train of thought when she felt her mom and Carlisle’s eyes on her. “Jacob and I weren’t sleeping together then.” She looked to Jacob, seeing the question that he didn’t want to ask swimming through his mind – Jeremy. “I wasn’t with anyone then,” she said firmly, meeting Jacob’s eyes, who looked relieved, but confused. He trusted her, and never thought her and Jeremy had been intimate, but the timing wasn’t adding up. “We were intimate February 7th and weren’t together after that until March 13th.” She felt a little embarrassed to have remembered the dates, but knew it was just over a month that they had been apart and she had missed their proximity everyday.

Carlisle hesitated, but nodded, “You’re sure?”

Jacob nodded in agreement, “Positive.”  
“The fetus is definitely in alignment with your blood panel for six weeks…” he trailed off, lost in thought, remembering Sue’s earlier words about the supernatural aspect to this. They would be the first alpha male and female to have mated, as per his theory, though he hadn’t exactly expected it to play out like this back when he told Jacob about his idea. “You told me about Leah’s feelings changing, what, three weeks ago?”

“She hasn’t phased since,” Sue said pointedly. “And she had some bleeding, too. Implantation, maybe? It still doesn’t make sense for dating, but I’d be willing to bet with the feeling change, not being able to phase, and the bleeding, that conception was three weeks ago.”

The night she told Jacob she loved him. It was a nice omen, but her head was spinning. “I wouldn’t be six weeks already, though. Or symptomatic.”

“Unless, like Bella, your pregnancy is… heightened for a timeline because of the shapeshifter gene. Could also explain why you’ve been so sick – your hormone is rising extremely quickly because you’re progressing faster than a human pregnancy.”

Now her head was really spinning. “So, I’m only three weeks?”

Sue sighed, “But registering at six.”

Carlisle hesitated, “You’ll need to go on a prenatal vitamin as soon as possible, and I want to put you on medication for the morning sickness. If you’re not getting any nutrients, the baby isn’t either. I’m going to keep a very close eye to you until we can figure out how fast you’re progressing to make sure you and the baby are healthy. The only way to confirm it will be close monitoring.”

The baby.

Leah still felt like this was a dream.

Carlisle went on to complete a full pelvic exam after she changed into a hospital gown – much to her dismay, but her shock didn’t allow her to think too much into it as Sue looked over the pictures and Jacob held her hand unwaveringly. 

“Now, Leah, you have options-“ Carlisle stated as he went over, washing his hands. “I am required to inform you that you are not required to carry this pregnancy if you decide that it is not something you want to pursue. Of course, given your… supernatural abilities, adoption isn’t a practical option.”

“What?” Jacob asked suddenly, looking at Leah. “No, we’re not going to...” He never felt surer of anything in his entire life – his duty to step up compelled him to want to make this work. This was his child; his responsibility; their baby. It felt weird to immediately want to defend something he didn’t know anything about, and he flashed back to Bella’s determination to keep her child and suddenly understood for the first time ever.

“Thank you,” Leah responded to Carlisle. “We’ll discuss it.”

“I’ll leave you both alone for a moment,” He said, stepping out after handing Leah a prescription for the medication she needed and names of some over-the-counter prenatal vitamins. Sue followed him out, wanting to give them some time together, but stayed outside the room in case they needed her. They had a lot to figure out, and they would need her and Billy considerably.

“You’re really considering not having this baby?” Jacob asked, feeling anger bubble in his stomach at the thought of anything happening to the small image in the pictures.

“I want this baby,” Leah’s voice broke, not realizing how badly she did want it until the option to terminate was given. “I’m just scared. There is a lot to figure out.”

“I’ll build us a house, Leah – the guys will help, and you can use the rabbit since I can still shift and I have the motorcycle. I'll work on cars on the reservation to make some money, and I'll talk to Renesmee and make sure she understands without a doubt that we’re done - I want you. I’ve been telling you for weeks that I want you. What else do you need from me? I’m in. I was in before we got here - before there was a baby to be in for. I won’t abandon you.” Jacob was getting worked up and he felt his blood pressure rising, trying to figure out his place here, but also not wanting to make any rash decisions. He had a lot of time to think on the way over here about what to do from here, and he had a tentative plan.

Leah frowned and sat up, seeing the wolf threatening to emerge. She hesitated before she brought his hand under the gown, onto her belly, wanting to calm him down – needing him to keep his cool and, not knowing how else to do it. She couldn’t tell him the things he wanted to hear - because they were stuck in her throat, but she saw him center a little as soon as he touched her belly and was glad. Honestly, it calmed her, too. 

Jacob’s anger slowly diminished, his hand feeling the warmth of her skin against his – against the flesh and blood that they created together, growing in her stomach. Just the thought of their baby in her stomach, remembering the small picture, overwhelmed him in every way possible. It was surreal. 

“Are we having this baby? No matter how many obstacles are thrown at us?” Leah asked softly as she watched Jacob’s breathing even-out.

“Yes,” he said quickly, looking up to meet her eyes. “We’re keeping it.”

Leah smiled, amusement filling her eyes for the first time in hours. Despite their current situation, she had to admit, his persistence and desire to do this made her feel better – and a little turned on. These hormones were going to be fun, she realized. “It’s not a puppy, Jacob.”

“I know,” he said strongly, the determination to make this work radiating off him; his confidence in them. “I want to make this work. I’ll feed it and take it for walks and love and play with it.”

Leah laughed despite the horrible situation they were thrown into. Right now, she wasn’t going to get all the answers she needed, so she focused on stomaching this news and trying to wrap her head around it as her shock dissipated slowly.

She took a shaky breath and Jacob sat beside her, pulling her into his arms again. She inhaled his scent and found he soothed her entirely. “I think the baby likes your cologne,” she said softly, her words muffled by his shirt.

Jacob chuckled, “My cologne?”

“It’s one of the few things that doesn’t make me feel sick,” Leah explained, thinking back to them at the bridal studio, too, and how soothing it was to her.

Jacob pulled back to look at her – and studied her face before kissing her. She kissed him back feverishly, feeling like her entire center was back together now, despite the rocky road they had ahead of them and the decisions they had to make like boulders crashing down on them. “Let’s go home.”

Leah hesitated at his words. As much as she wanted to go home and get away from the Cullen’s, the fluids she felt going into her body finally gave her a little strength. “Do you think we can take this thing,” she gestured up to the bag.

Jacob nodded, “I can’t see why not. How are you feeling?”

“If you ask me that every ten minutes, I swear I will punch you in the face – and it will hurt, unlike when Bella tried her luck.”

Jacob smiled at the familiar Leah he knew and loved. “I don't doubt that. I’ll be right back, okay?”

She nodded, with a good indication that he was going to see about taking the IV fluids – and clue things up with Renesmee. She tried not to think about it, though, as her mom came back in and hugged her tightly. She had a lot to discuss with her daughter, but right now was not the time.

“I love you, Leah,” Sue whispered.

“I love you, too,” she returned, feeling her eyes well with tears again.

“Carlisle?” Jacob asked, seeing Edward and him talking in the entrance way. “Is there any way we can take the IV fluids back with her?”

Carlisle nodded, “Of course. I’ll leave some fluid bags with you until the medication kicks in. Sue can monitor her. We’re going to go home, but Sue said she would cover the generic pregnancy basics with you both. Unless either of you have any questions?”

“Nothing that seems to have an answer,” Jacob said honestly. “Thanks for coming, Carlisle. We appreciate it."

“Anytime. I’ll be back weekly until we can accurately monitor Leah’s fetal development rate. How are you doing with the news?”

Jacob sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “So far? Not terrible. It’s still a shock. Just trying to take it in and be there for Leah.”

“That’s all you can do,” Carlisle said warmly. Edward didn’t speak to him, likely because he was still angry with him for hurting Renesmee – but, he couldn’t say that he didn’t understand. A baby changed things significantly. He had been here – faced with fatherhood and it was no joke.

Jacob thanked him again before excusing himself. He went outside to the front porch where Renesmee sat, alone, on the swing. She turned when she heard the door open and then looked back out at the darkness as he went over to sit beside her.

“So, you’re going to be a dad,” Renesmee said softly, trying to put on a brave face and ignore her emotions about this – she couldn't deny that beyond the shock, Jacob seemed happy about it and she wanted to support him.

He sighed and pulled out one of the photos and passed it to her. It didn’t look like much to her, but she still felt tears stinging her eyes knowing it solidified their lack of ever reconciling and him never being her Jacob anymore – for good.

Jacob frowned, seeing the look on her face and he reached out to pull her into him before she started crying. “Nessie,” his heart felt like it was going to drop to his feet seeing her cry. There wasn’t any romance left between them for him – the remainder had seemed to fizzle itself out now that he knew about the pregnancy, even though most of it had gone as soon as he had made his decision to be with Leah. Still, it killed him to see Renesmee upset.

Renesmee didn’t fight his welcoming arms, she melted into him and only looked up to meet his gaze after her tears dried. “I’m sorry, this is just… a lot.”

“I get it,” he said honestly. 

“I’m glad you’re happy,” she said suddenly, avoiding his eyes again.

“Are you happy?” His wolf had to know; hear the words.

She shrugged, “I guess so.”

“You guess?”

“I’m happy that you’re happy.” Silence hung between them because he didn’t really know that to say. He was going to have a baby – a family, with a woman he was crazy for, but it didn’t dull the pain he felt at hurting Renesmee to get his happily ever after. He felt like he was in Sam's shoes once again – faced with a future that excited him but regret over breaking someone else's heart to get it. “I should go.”

“Don’t leave like this,” he asked sympathetically. 

“Grandpa, dad, and Aunt Alice are waiting on me,” she explained. “I’ll be back, I promise.” Renesmee would always be a constant in his life because the imprint was always going to be something they had to weather. Even if Jacob felt the loss of romance between them, he still felt soothed by being near her. It was something he had to now mitigate not only with a girlfriend, but with the mother of his future child. His imprint had been so easy months ago, but now, it caused so many more questions to swim through his mind – one’s he had to push aside for a later date.

“I’m sorry for hurting you.”

“Don't be. I know that Leah makes you happy and I want nothing more than happiness for the both of you. I'll be fine, I just need some time to process everything. I want to be a part of your lives, the baby included, inasmuch as Leah will allow me, but I need some time to wrap my head around everything.” 

“I understand. Thank you,” he breathed. He wanted to tell her that Leah did make him happy but refrained from hurting her more by hearing the words. He also felt a familiarity in Renesmee’s words – words he remembered Leah saying to Emily and Sam. Maybe Leah would take solace in the solidification of their relationship by hearing that Renesmee had said them and stepped back, once again. 

She kissed his cheek before going back inside to get ready to leave and Jacob sat there for a long moment so he wouldn’t go after her to try to leave on a better note. He finally made the journey back into the room with Leah - to unwaveringly face his future, but was stopped by Alice on his way.

“Jacob?”

“Yeah?”

“Your future… it’s changed.”

“Changed?”

“You and Leah seem to have a very long and happy life together,” she said sweetly. “Congratulations.” 

“What was my future before?”

“It changed when Renesmee… well, became a woman. It aligned with the imprint, but when you both decided her leaving, alone, was the best and you acknowledged your feelings for Leah, it shifted to being aligned with Leah’s, but now? There’s no way to possible untangle your futures from one another. A baby would do that, of course, but it’s more than that. Your feelings for one another have really cemented since I saw you last.”

Jacob took in the information, and once again, collected it to present to Leah later. She may be skeptical about the Cullen’s, but they knew Alice’s visions were accurate. “Thank you, Alice.”

“You’re welcome, I just thought it may give you and Leah some peace of mind right now. Congratulations.” She left with Edward, Carlisle, and Renesmee then and he went back in with Leah and Sue. He wasn't sure what the pixie-vamp meant exactly but felt comforted by the words and the future she saw that involved him and Leah.  
“Let’s go home,” her mom said.

Leah nodded, looking toward Jacob. “Are you…”

”Do you want me to?”

Leah nodded, wanting him close; to face this together.

”Then I’m there.” He took her hand and kissed her cheek. 

Sue handed her back her clothing and she slipped behind the room divider to change out of the hospital gown.

Jacob got up from the bed and went over to Sue, hugging her. “Thank you for everything,” he said softly.

Sue wrapped her arms around Jacob and sighed, “Take care of her, okay?”

”I promise,” he pulled back. “I won’t abandon her.”

The words resonated, because of Harry’s presence in them, and she smiled softly as Leah emerged. Jacob went to her side immediately and took her hand, but Leah faced her mom. “Mom… I’m so sorry that I didn’t listen to you.”

”Seems to be a reoccurring theme,” she said, trying to bring a lightness back into the seriousness of the conversation. “Moms know things, Leah… and now you’re going to find that out first-hand.” There was a sadness in her voice, though; at the thought of her little girl having a baby of her own.  
Leah felt her eyes well up again under her mom’s gaze and she dropped Jacob’s hand, Sue engulfing her into a hug. “Don’t be sorry,” Sue said softly. “What’s done is done,” she repeated her words from earlier. “We’ll figure everything out, I promise.”  
Leah pulled back and nodded, wiping away a couple of tears streaking her cheeks. 

“Let’s get you home to rest. I’ll fill the prescription on the way, okay?”

They all left the room, Jacob instinctively taking Leah’s hand again. As weird as it was for him, Sue was comforting - motherly, and Jacob suddenly wished desperately for his own mother in that moment, but he had to be strong - for Leah. She wouldn’t tell him, but he saw the terror all over her face, and he wanted to ease her mind as much as he could and keep her calm. He may still be a teenager, but he felt more like a man than ever before. He knew he still had to figure out him and Renesmee – even with their romantic future put to bed for good, there were still a lot of unresolved feelings there, including Leah's, but right now his priority was Leah and their baby.

They left and Leah and Jacob both slipped into the back seat together, and she got as close to him as she could. Their troubles were currently forgotten, and he wrapped an arm around her waist - which was hard to do with the seat belts, but he wanted her as close as possible. She rested her head on his shoulder, and he felt idly at peace, despite their circumstances. They sat like that, in silence, until Sue started driving and broke the quiet.

“I told Carlisle that I’d fill you in on the rest. Eat whatever you can. Saltine crackers and ginger ale may help with the nausea. Don’t push yourself more than you can handle - you’re going to be really tired. No hot baths, alcohol or drugs, smoking, raw meats or shellfish, fish with high mercury, raw eggs, soft cheese, keep the caffeine to a minimum, let me know if you have any questions about any medications, and no heavy lifting.” Leah listened quietly, and Sue’s professional, nurse persona was brought out. “The morning sickness should stop when your hCG hormone regulates. The first trimester it’s increasing very quickly and that’s what is speculated to cause morning sickness, so hopefully once you’re out of the first trimester, it will ease up. Like Carlisle said, if your levels are increasing faster than normal, it can make the nausea worse. It correlates with the dizziness too, because of your blood pressure changing, and since your uterus is growing, and you’re going to experience some aches and very minor cramping - if you have any bleeding or bad cramping, call me immediately, okay?”

Leah smiled, “Will do, nurse Clearwater.”

”I’m going to move back in,” Sue said finally. “At least until you’re settled.”

”No, mom, I’ll be fine, seriously -”

Sue looked in the rear-view mirror and then back to the road. “I’m not asking. You’re going to need me. You should tell Billy and your brother soon, and, of course, the guys eventually but I want to be there for you. It isn’t going to be easy.”

”So that’s what Old Quil saw, a baby?”

Sue shrugged, “I assume so. I’m willing to bet he thought it was Sam and Emily’s at first… but then when you came to us, I think he realized… well, both of you, with the wolf-bloodlines, that this could be of high importance for the pack. I want to keep a close eye on you to make sure everything progresses normally.”

”Do you think she’s at risk?” Jacob asked.

“The ultrasound looks fine,” Sue commented. “So, I wouldn’t jump to any conclusions yet, but since you both carry the wolf gene so prominently, we just need to take some extra precautions: more frequent ultrasounds and blood work, just to monitor things. Carlisle will be back weekly, as he mentioned, to ensure things are progressing as normally as possible and I’ll be around here if you need me. Try to stress as least as possible, take care of yourself, and don't do anything too strenuous on your body.”

Sue pulled into the hospital to fill the prescriptions, “I’ll be right back.” 

“What a crazy day,” Leah sighed. 

“That doesn’t even begin to cover it.”

“Did you see Renesmee after?”

He nodded, “Yeah, she’s a little upset, but fine.”

“Upset?”

He sighed and looked into her eyes, “She said she was serious about letting me go, but she thought there would be a chance I’d realize eventually that I did want her. I think the baby made her realize that wasn’t going to happen, so she was upset, but she understood.”

“Even with her gone and letting you go, she still wants you,” Leah sighed.

“And she knows I want you and I was very clear on that,” he promised. “She said she wants to be a part of our lives, and the babies, as much as you’re comfortable with.”

Leah nodded and pressed her clammy forehead against the cool glass of the window in thought until her mom came back and put the car into drive. “I’m going to stop by Charlie’s to get some of my things and I’ll call the council when we get home just to let them know you’re okay. We can tell them the details once you’re both ready.”

”We can go over tomorrow morning and tell my dad, Rachel, and I guess Paul, by default,” Jacob said nervously. 

“And Seth.”

He nodded, “Then we'll tackle the others.”

It was getting extremely real, and scary, but Leah knew Jacob was right - he had to continue phasing to train Seth in as the Beta, keep the younger wolves under control, and mediate Paul and Sam’s attempt to phase-out entirely, depending on the volturi's future impact. There wasn’t room for secrecy in the pack. She hadn't heard anything about it since Marcus left, but she was sure Jacob and Carlisle had spoken about it since and made a mental note to ask when things settled down a little. She was also willing to be that he was just as scared as she was, and because of all of that, they wouldn’t be able to keep this secret for long, especially with Carlisle’s upcoming frequent visits. “Okay,” she said softly, realizing she got lucky not having to tell her mom and that she found out with them. She was also extremely grateful for her strength and comfort.

Billy, on the other hand, kind of terrified her, and she could tell the thought didn't bring warm and fuzzy feelings to Jacob, either. She could almost read his thoughts without wolf-telepathy, but she couldn’t think of anything comforting to say. It was mean, considering how he pushed through his feelings to comfort her, but hearing Renesmee’s hope for a reconciliation kind of worried her on top of the whole pregnancy thing.

”What’s wrong?” Jacob asked, seeing another unsolicited tear slip down her cheek before she hastily wiped it away.

”Nothing,” she whispered as they pulled into Charlie’s driveway.

”Come in,” Sue said before getting out.

They all went inside, and as soon as Charlie saw their faces, his brow furrowed. “Is everything okay?” He asked Sue as he hugged her in greeting. Sue nodded deftly, before telling him she was going to stay the night at her place and grab some of her things and that they would talk later.

“You don’t look well, Leah,” Charlie commented awkwardly, leaning against the stair railing. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

As her mom left to go upstairs, Leah felt all of the terror and sadness well up in her eyes at his words as she had to face the truth for the first time - having to utter the words, and she felt the tears come in another, unstoppable, hormonal-induced wave. Suddenly, it wasn’t Jacob’s arms she was in, but Charlie’s as he came over, hugging her tightly seeing the transformation of emotion play out over her face - and she let him. He gave Jacob a worried look, but focused on Leah, wanting to be there for her in place of Harry. He didn’t say anything, and he didn’t have to, but when she pulled back to wipe her cheeks, Jacob putting a hand on the small of her back, his heart breaking for her, Charlie took her hand. “What is it? Are you okay?”

”I’m pregnant,” she said softly, the words feeling thick in her throat. 

Charlie looked between them, and Jacob deftly remembered Charlie’s advice to be safe when he caught them in the back of the car. Why had he been so stupid? “A baby is a blessing, Leah,” he managed after a long moment of silence. “No matter what-”

“A terrifying one,” she admitted finally.

”That’s normal,” Charlie said soothingly.

Sue came back down, seeing Leah’s damp cheeks, and frowned as Charlie met her eyes. “How far along?”

”Six weeks,” Sue answered. “Everything looks fine, it’s… well, just a shock.”

”Is it okay if I come over tonight?”

Sue looked to her daughter, who nodded, and Sue smiled. “Of course.”

Charlie wouldn’t say it in front of Leah, but despite Sue’s calm, collected demeanor, he had gotten to know her well - and he saw the uneasiness behind her eyes. He put a hand on Leah’s shoulder before going to get his things, and Sue frowned, hugging Leah tightly as more tears fell from her eyes, putting her bag down. 

“I’m sorry I’ve disappointed everyone.”

Sue’s brow furrowed, and she pulled back, studying her daughter’s features. “You didn’t disappoint me, or anyone else,” she said earnestly, seeing a fresh wave of tears threatening to spill over. She felt her own burning her eyes, but she had to be strong. “Why would you say that?”

”You warned me. Hell, everyone warned us. You, Charlie, Billy… and we didn’t listen.”

”I wish you made… better choices,” Sue said, looking between them. “But I’m not disappointed in you. Maybe when this started, I wasn’t on board, but a lot has changed since. All I have to do is look at you both to see how much you care for one another. Was this the best time for a baby? No, but there’s never a good time. You’re both so strong.” She reached out to take Jacob’s hand, too, seeing tears well in his eyes. “Don’t think you’ve disappointed anyone – either of you.”

Jacob suddenly turned away, walking into the living room, feeling his own tears fall. He was trying to be strong, but he felt terrible for being the cause of Leah’s distress - and knowing that she was probably internalizing him and Renesmee. If he had of had more resolve that night, maybe things would be different now. Maybe they would have stayed together, happy, and this baby would of course have been a shock, but at least when she thought of their baby, she wouldn’t worry about his loyalty. He was trying so hard to convince her of his solidarity in his decision, but he knew she still worried, especially after Renesmee’s admission today.

Leah looked at her mom, and there was an unspoken conversation between them. Sue knew Jacob wanted to be strong for Leah, but he was going through a lot right now, too, and they needed each other.

Leah hesitated before going over to where Jacob stood, in front of the window in Charlie’s living room. She heard Charlie come downstairs, but Sue ushered him out into the SUV.

“Jake,” Leah whispered softly. He didn’t turn to face her, but she reached out to take his hand and pull him close, causing him to turn and as soon as she saw the tears on his face, she pressed herself against him tightly. “I forgive you.” Her heart still hurt, and it would for a while, but they both realized what she meant - for his night with Renesmee. She had told him before that she wanted to forgive him, but now she had to. With a baby on the way, she couldn't hold it over his head forever and she had to truly forgive and forget – and trust him, without question, moving forward. They had to be a team. “I want you and us and this baby more than anything I've ever wanted before and I trust you.”

He rested his face in the crook of her neck, smelling the familiar scent of her shampoo as his silent tears dried. “What I did… was inexcusable, I know that. I should have had more willpower. I can blame the imprint all I want,” and oh, he did. “But I should have been better for you. For us. That’s the worst part in all of this for you, isn’t it?” He pulled back to look into her eyes, and she gulped the growing lump in her throat before nodding. He knew she always wanted to be a mom, so the shock of a baby was, well, shocking, but if things had of been different, maybe she wouldn't be as fearful. 

“I just… pictured finding out I was pregnant a lot differently.”

Jacob nodded understandingly. “With Sam.”

The thoughts of Sam, beside her, married to her, from back at Carlisle's when she remembered her original depiction of today resurfaced and she nodded. He may not have held as much of her heart as before, but, well, she wasn’t sure your first love every truly fizzled out. She still cared deeply for him, but in an unromantic way. He wasn’t the main man in her heart - Jacob was. And then, with that realization, she felt her words come out, rushed. 

“I always pictured Sam with me… so excited. When we were in high school, I thought I was pregnant once. We… we weren’t safe at a party. It was stupid, in hindsight, but when I told him I was late… I was a little scared but mostly happy. He was supportive and honestly? When the test came back negative, we both cried, and it wasn’t relief. We wanted the baby - we wanted each other, forever, and we dreamed of a family for so long. We used to lay in bed, thinking of our kid’s names. We wouldn’t have been ready and obviously I’m relieved now, knowing how things turned out, but at the time… a baby was just an extension for our love for each other, and it was something we both were so excited for, regardless of the circumstances,” she said, feeling more emotion well in her chest. “And I just pictured finding out to be… scary, yes, but… with someone who loved me unconditionally.”

Jacob sighed and leaned in to kiss her cheek having uncovered another layer of Leah Clearwater. “I do love you,” he said honestly. “Unconditionally.”

“And that’s why I forgive you - because you did choose me that night, even though I’m still hurt that it wasn’t as… immediate as I’d like. But I think I understand - the imprint aside, I think a part of me will always love Sam, just as a part of you will always love Renesmee. I didn’t know if or when I would get over the part of you that still felt obligated to Renesmee, at first, but today? Finding out we were having a baby, immediately thinking of Sam and what we lost… I just, maybe I understood a little. I’m sure you thought of Renesmee, too… but right here and now? All I want is you; I want us; I want this baby, and I want us to give it our best effort to be together and be a family, because as scared as I am, I love you and I really want to be excited about this. We have a lot to figure out, that’s clear, and a few hard conversations to have but I think we can do it and I want to do it. With you. I want to really put the past behind us and figure out what our future looks like.”

Jacob felt his heart swell and he reached down, crushing his lips to hers. They moved slowly, but fiercely against her own, and she kissed him back as though she was drowning, and he was the oxygen she needed to survive. 

“Lee?”

”Yeah?” 

“I need you to know that you’re not my second best,” he said firmly, remembering her dread over being a constant second choice. “You and this baby are my number one priority. Finding out you’re pregnant… it was surreal, and it still is scary, but as soon as I saw that ultrasound…” he reached into his pocket, taking the three, small images out again. “I knew I’d never question my position in your life ever again. Imprinting was life changing, but this? There are no words. This is where I belong. I knew it before the baby happened – or well, we found out, but today… even talking to Renesmee, I didn’t feel the romantic feelings for her anymore. I care about her, inasmuch as you do for Sam, but the past is the past. I love you, and I’m committed to us.”

”We’ll figure this out,” she promised as he kissed her again and although she felt more at-peace, she couldn’t help the nervousness come back at telling Billy – and Seth. “Together.”


	17. Family

The next morning, Leah wasn’t feeling 100%, but Sue insisted on cooking her a nutritional breakfast. Even with the anti-nausea medication, she wasn’t feeling herself, but still better than before. Her and Jacob rolled out of bed around 10:30 AM and after some casual breakfast conversation with her mom and Charlie, two-slices of toast and some fruit for Leah and a plate-full of food for Jacob, they both left to go over to Billy’s. Sue offered to go, but they decided they needed to do this on their own. Seth had been at Abigail’s late the night before and then had patrol early this morning, so he was a conversation for later. 

Once breakfast was over, they made the short walk to Billy’s in silence - both trying to deal with the sobering thoughts of the pregnancy that the prior night had brought as well as their opinions on it in the fresh daylight and consumed with their own worries about telling Jacob’s family.

She knew Billy loved her like a daughter, especially since her dad died, but he had been skeptical of her becoming Beta and once he found out about their relationship, he wasn’t exactly pleased from what she heard considering the imprint was involved. Now, with an impending pregnancy, she was terrified of his reaction. Would Billy think that she ruined Jacob’s life with a baby? Would he be disappointed that they hadn’t been safe? She wanted him to be excited – ease her own nerves by showing what a good thing this was instead of heightening all of her concerns about this even further, but she knew she had to stand by Jacob’s side no matter what the reaction from everyone. They had to put up a united front, even if the news evoked varying reactions that may be less than ideal.

Jacob’s voice pulled her out of her thoughts, “Ready?”

“I guess so.”

She had a flashback to Jacob pulling on her arm at the wedding, right as she froze as they started walking down the aisle, because it happened again as he started walking. There was a sick feeling growing in her stomach, but it wasn’t her usual morning sickness. They went inside and Jacob instinctively took her hand, lacing his fingers through hers. They had a lot of work to do to convince everyone that they were going to be fine, but all he was worried about right now was gaining the support of their parents. He knew they could make this work. They had to. 

Billy, Rachel, and Paul were in the kitchen, talking and laughing around the table while eating breakfast. Leah felt sick at the smell of more food considering what she already ate wasn’t sitting well – and her nerves weren’t helping, but she tried to breathe through her mouth and take deep, calming breaths. Jacob sensed her change of breathing and looked to her as his dad and sister greeted them happily. 

“Are you okay?” She nodded and he squeezed her hand reassuringly. “I can ask Paul to leave…”

“They’ll all know sooner than later.”

They went inside, Jacob leaning against the kitchen counter and Leah hovering close to him to try and inherit some of his strength in that moment. “Hey,” Jacob greeted as they all turned their attention to the newcomers. “What’s up?”

”Just talking about the wedding,” Rachel said happily. “We finally have a date.”

”Oh?” Leah asked, trying to forget about their own news for a moment. “When?”

”June 9th.”

”Woah that’s… fast, isn’t it?” Jacob asked. 

“My thoughts, too,” Billy mused. “But Rebecca’s agreed to come back, even with the pregnancy, so the rest of the details can be thrown together quickly.”

Leah felt her stomach jolt at Billy’s words - the pregnancy. It took her a minute to realize that he meant Rebecca’s, and she sighed in relief. 

“Well, why wait?” Rachel asked happily, evoking a supportive smile from Leah, before reaching over to take Paul’s hand. “It’ll be perfect as long as we’re married by the end of it. You need to get your dress!” Rachel said to Leah. “Maybe we can go bridesmaid dress shopping later this week with Emily? I have Rebecca’s measurements, but… well, the dresses probably need to be movable to accommodate Emily and Rebecca’s pregnancies. You’re going to have to be my ride or die at the bachelorette party – no tequila, but we should be safe with vodka. Me, you, and Kim will have to drink for the rest of the party-poopers.” She was rambling, and Leah felt her smile falter knowing she was about to disappoint Rachel. How did all her bridal party end up knocked up at the same time? Leah wanted to bolt even more, but Rachel kept going on about how Jacob would have to rent a suit and the color scheme, and she was uncharacteristically quiet, frozen in place. Rachel barely realized her friend’s lack of excitement through her own.

Billy noticed, though, and raised a brow. “How are you, Leah?” He asked, sipping his coffee. “Did Carlisle find anything?”

Leah nodded, looking up to Jacob, who decided it was his turn to take over. Leah was rarely speechless, but she didn’t want to feud this argument. “She will be fine.”

Leah could tell that Jacob was stalling and as Rachel looked between them both she finally realized the heavy mood in the room and fell silent. Leah was desperately hoping her best friend wasn’t going to disown her for getting knocked up by said best-friends brother. She hadn’t condoned their relationship – that was putting it mildly, this entire time because of the irresponsible recklessness of it. She wasn’t wrong, but now they were even more reckless and irresponsible. Of course, she had come to terms with it as of recently but dating her brother and having her brother’s baby were two, completely different commitments. Plus, she was going to have to live it up at her bachelorette party alone with Kim and Leah felt even more guilty about that.

”So… what’s wrong?” Rachel asked. 

Leah met her gaze, feeling ashamed again that she let this happen. The sobering thought of a baby this morning was really settling in as the shock wore off. Neither of them had slept well last night. 

“Well, actually, Sue figured it out before we went to Carlisle’s,” Jacob said unsteadily. His bravado was quickly fading, and Leah suddenly felt like she shouldn’t let him feud this alone, despite her own nerves.

Jumping in to the conversation as Billy looked between the two, brow raised, waiting for them to start making sense of something, Leah knew she had to approach the topic carefully. “Carlisle, uh, confirmed her suspicions when we got there.”

Jacob thanked her with his eyes and although he knew she was uncomfortable, he was grateful for her in that moment. He looked back between his dad, Rachel, and Paul who were all clearly confused and concerned.

“You don’t beat around the bush with anything,” Paul said suddenly. “Neither of you. Is everything okay?”

“Leah and I are having a baby,” Jacob choked the words out, avoiding Billy’s gaze. 

“You’re pregnant!?” Rachel exclaimed.

Leah nodded, forcing herself to meet her friend’s gaze. “6 weeks. I’ll have to take a rain cheque on the vodka at the bachelorette party, I’m sorry.” It was a silly thing to apologize for considering Billy hadn’t spoke yet, but she hated disappointing Rachel.

Jacob reached into his pocket and brought the pictures over to the table, placing them in the middle, waiting for his dad to say something. He was stoic and reached over to pick up the pictures gingerly. Rachel was shocked but got up immediately and pulled Leah into a crushing hug. 

“Oh my God,” Rachel cried, tears immediately coming to her eyes. “Are you really having a baby?” She pulled back, looking between the two. Leah hadn’t expected such a pleasant reaction but was grateful and hugged her back tightly before nodding. “We can drink anytime,” she said hurriedly, waving off her apology. “Are you and the baby okay? That’s why you’ve been sick?”

Leah nodded, trying to feud all of Rachel’s questions – and hugs. “We’re fine,” she promised. 

Jacob smiled at his sister’s excitement, feeling a little less pressure in the room, and Paul got up, extending his hand to Jacob. “Congratulations.”

Billy was still staring at the picture, and moments later, after Rachel had jumped into her brothers arms happily and Paul congratulated Leah with an awkward hug, did he look up. “How?” Billy asked, obviously confused.

“Well, dad, you know, when a man meets a woman-“ Rachel started, trying to ease the heavy mood coming from her father.

“Rachel,” he said strongly before looking back to Leah. “Your fertility…”

“Carlisle thinks that everything went back to normal when I stopped phasing and because of the wolf gene, the pregnancy is… well, sped up for a timeline. I should only be three weeks, to coincide when I stopped phasing, but I’m registering at six in my bloodwork and the ultrasound, so he thinks that’s why I’ve also been so sick and that because of the baby, Jacob was able to fully reject the imprint.” Long story short.

Billy nodded, trying to understand how this happened, reflecting on their conversation the night before as he looked down to the picture again before meeting his son’s gaze. “You didn’t… use protection?”

Jacob could not have turned any redder in that moment – his dad’s ‘sex talk’ when he was fourteen consisted of a box of condoms and telling him that he had to treat women right and be safe. As a kid, he used the condoms to make water balloons and annoy his sisters and that was the end of it. He suddenly felt fourteen again – and just as embarrassed. Especially considering he had an unopened box of condoms in his room still that his dad gave him when he realized he really was actually having sex – not that they would have lasted too long, but that was besides the point. “It wasn’t supposed to happen.” It was a stupid excuse, but it was all they had.

“Dad,” Rachel said sweetly. “What’s done is done.”

“I know,” he said, sighing. “I just…” He put the picture down and Rachel picked it up to look at as Billy looked between Leah and Jacob. Leah saw the disappointment in his eyes, and she felt a lump grow in her throat. She couldn’t expect everyone to jump for joy – this was a surprise that no one thought possible and she knew her mom had masked her feelings about it the night before to try and be strong for them and help them through the shock. Billy didn’t have to do that. She had a feeling this may be the toughest conversation she would have about the baby and she was suddenly reminded of what she would have saw in her own father’s eyes at the news if he was still here. Billy’s eyes fell on Jacob. “I don’t usually get involved; you know that. I try to… sit back and let you kids make your own mistakes.”

“The baby isn’t a mistake,” Jacob said suddenly through gritted teeth.

Billy immediately put his hand up and shook his head, “Not where I was going with that,” he said honestly before continuing. “I just… I want to intrude right now, because this is… a lifelong commitment, as you both know. Are you ready?”

“Definitely not,” Leah responded honestly and Billy met her gaze with a sad look in his eyes.

”You can never be ready for this,” Jacob replied, remembering Sue’s words.

“I don’t want either of you to get hurt,” Billy said strongly. “And I don’t want you to underestimate the amount of work and commitment being a parent is.”

“Alice said my future’s changed; Leah and I’s future is inseparable” Jacob replied. “I know it’s a big responsibility, but it’s ours to figure out.”

Leah looked up to him, brow furrowed, hearing about Alice’s vision for the first time. The thought was soothing, she had to admit, but right now there were other things to deal with.

Billy was apprehensive about the Cullen’s gifts, and he looked back down to the ultrasound picture that Rachel had placed back on the table of his grandchild. “And you’re sure that you want this pregnancy?” Billy asked, looking back up to his son and Leah.

Leah felt Jacob’s hand squeeze hers and she met Billy’s gaze with tears brimming her eyes. “I’ve always wanted a family. It may be a little unorthodox, but I love Jacob. Having a baby is definitely scary, but with him,” she looked up to meet Jacob’s eyes. “I know we can do it.”

Jacob smiled at her and leaned down to kiss her cheek before turning to his dad, echoing her sentiments. “Leah is the woman I love. We’ve come a long way from being the kids who played together in the sandbox, and then being on opposite sides of the Cullen situation, and we found a way to work together, even with our conflicting ideologies. She challenges me and whatever it was, instinctual or not, that led us to where we are now, I’m equally as scared as I am excited.” 

“I know Jacob’s only seventeen, and it’s not ideal,” Leah said, following up to Jacob’s words, wanting so badly for Billy to be on board for her sake, and Jacob’s. His tight grip on her hand told her he was still nervous under his dad’s scrutiny. “But not many seventeen-year old’s that I grew up with would be able to do half of the things that he’s already done. He’s matured because of the pack – everyone has.”

“Leah and I have already been through a lot together and if this was anyone else pregnant with my kid, I think I’d be even more scared, but we’ve literally known each other our entire lives and we understand things that other people don’t. When I contemplated Renesmee’s original ask to go with her when the Cullen’s left, I just kept thinking how we had nothing in common besides the imprint. Leah was there when mom died. She was there to give me the kick in the butt I needed when Bella continually chose Edward, I was there for her when Sam got married and when her dad died, and we were thrown into a wolf pack together. We’re a good match, and we have a lot in common.”   
“And I know it’s different, but watching Bella go through her pregnancy really gave me an appreciation for the seriousness and commitment involved. I know Renesmee grew fast and wasn’t… your average baby, but I do understand what we’re facing here, and it’s our fault for not using protection, but we’re taking responsibility for our actions and I really hope you’ll be on board.”

“Well,” Billy replied, his eyes softening. “As long as both of you are aware that this may not be as easy as it should be… and you both want this, you know I’m going to be here for you – both of you. I wish you were both more equipped for this, though. I won’t lie, I’m concerned. Supportive, but concerned.”

Leah felt more tears well up in her eyes and she tried to blink them back, but it was a losing battle. Billy’s disappointment was clear, even through his attempt at being okay with the news. She tried to tell herself it was normal – again, this was a huge shock not only to them, but also their families, but she felt the weight of disappointing everyone heavy on her shoulders. Jacob was about to respond to his dad when Rachel came over, seeing her friend’s mood shift, and hug her. “You’ll be okay,” she promised as Leah buried her face into her shoulder before her tears fell.

“Lee,” Jacob choked out, his voice gentle as he reached out to place a hand on her lower back. Rachel met her brother’s gaze and pulled back so he could be there for her; she knew they had to get through this together. Fucking pregnancy hormones.

“I just…” She said as Jacob pulled her smaller frame to his. “I just wish my dad was here but I’m glad he isn’t because I can’t handle disappointing anyone else.”

Rachel nodded, staying next to her friend. “Well, if he was, he’d probably have Jacob killed by now,” she teased, trying to make her feel better. 

Billy frowned and gestured, “Come here, child.” 

She hesitated before going over to sit across from Billy’s wheelchair at the table. Jacob stood behind her, hand on her shoulder, and Billy took both of Leah’s hands.

“Harry is with you every moment of everyday. He may not be here, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t with you.” He looked to his son, who looked a little emotional himself. He bet it had been a rough night last night for them both. “Your mother, too.” Billy sighed, his demeanor softening further. “I’m not disappointed in either of you. I’m just fearful. I don’t want anything to be difficult for either of you, but I know this ultimately will be. I can see that you’re happy together, and you are a good match with the imprint removed, but relationships are a lot of work and regardless of your past, you’re still new to dating and adding a baby to the mix is going to be challenging.” He looked over to his daughter and smiled, his eyes miles away.   
“When Sarah got pregnant, we were so excited and then when we found out it was twins…” Billy looked to Leah and Jacob as she wiped the remnants of tears off her cheek. “What a fright,” he chuckled. “I’d never even changed a diaper before, and then we were about to have not one, but two babies. The first year was the hardest year ever. Even when we finally decided to have another baby and were thrown into the whole process again, it was still scary and knowing that, and how young you are, and how you haven’t been together a long period of time… I just worry, as any parent would. I’m here to help, inasmuch as I can, and I’m sure your mother feels the same. I just want the best for you both. I know you love each other, but it’s… well, still early in your relationship. There will be a lot of hurdles.”

“I know,” Jacob said, clearing his throat. “But dad… You know me. When I commit to something, I’m all-in and I am all-in now, with Leah and with the baby. Is it scary? Obviously. We didn’t mean for this to happen, but it did and all we can do now is try to figure things out moving forward. I’m willing to bet most babies aren’t planned because regardless, it seems like a pretty terrifying change.”

“I didn’t think I’d ever find the piece of me that Sam broke again,” Leah spoke up. “But then when Jacob and I started seeing each other-“ That was the nice way of putting it. “I fell for him without even realizing. It feels so natural with him – we literally have known each other forever, and I think that maybe this was always supposed to happen.” She had to believe there was a greater plan at work here.

The pregnancy hormones were kicking Leah’s ass – especially to cry in front of Paul, of all people. He kept his distance to let them all have a family moment, but Billy looked up and gestured to him. “Come here, you’re just as much a part of this family, now. All of you are, and you have to be there for each other.”

Paul came over and nodded, standing on the opposite side of Jacob. “Anything you need, seriously.”

He thanked Paul, and Billy looked between his little family as Rachel sat on the other side of the table. “Who else knows?”

“Just my mom and Charlie.”

“We wanted to tell family, first,” Jacob replied. “I haven’t phased yet to try and… keep some privacy, but they know she’s not well and they’re going to want answers.” He looked to Leah. “And I bet you’ll probably want to tell Emily.”

“Are you telling everyone together?” Paul asked.

“We haven’t really talked anymore past telling you guys,” Leah answered. “And Seth this afternoon.”

“Well we can pull the band-aid off later today. I’ll arrange a pack-meeting. I want to get this over with,” Jacob said finally, looking into her nervous face. “I want them to know they are not to say anything about our love-life or our decision to have this baby. They aren’t to bring up the imprint anymore, and they are to help you in whatever way you need.”

As he spoke, Leah felt nostalgic. He was like Sam when he was sticking up for Emily about her scars. Jacob was protecting her – putting her first. 

“Fine, this afternoon,” she agreed. “After Seth.”

“We can get everyone together and tell him before we tell the others,” Jacob offered before Rachel pulled Leah away, asking her every question imaginable and tearing up over the sonogram of her little niece or nephew. It made Leah feel better, and Jacob was left to talk to his dad – and Paul, in private.

“I’m going to stay at Leah’s for now,” Jacob said, communicating one of the decisions they had made while trying to sleep the night before. “There’s more room at the Clearwater’s and you’ve already got Rachel and Paul here. Dad… I hate to ask, but… well, you know I’m never going to college. I was never suited for it, and now with the baby…”

“You can have your inheritance from your mother,” Billy said, knowing where his son was going with this. 

“Let me know if you need any help,” Paul offered. 

His son’s dedication to Leah made Billy’s heart swell. Maybe this was his son’s destiny, after all. 

“You have a lot of people to shock,” Paul smirked. “I kind of feel honored that I know before the others - like we’re real brothers.” His tone was teasing, but honestly, it was nice to have Jacob around, even when they bickered about his lack of control when it involved Rachel.

Jacob chuckled, but it lacked mirth. “This can’t go over well.”

Billy smiled, “I think you’re underestimating your friends.”

”I hope you’re right - I have enough to think about, let alone feud any arguments.”

”It’ll work out the way it’s supposed to.” Billy’s head was still reeling about the idea of another grandchild – of course he hadn’t expected Jacob to end up in this situation with Leah, he assumed Rachel to be next after Rebecca because of the imprint and her older age.

”Thanks dad,” Jacob hugged his father again and went into the living room where Leah and Rachel were sat on the couch, the ultrasound picture in-hand.

”I can’t believe you’re having a baby, Jakey - you are a baby,” Rachel teased. “My baby brother is having a baby.”

Leah rolled her eyes, but grinned. “Sorry if it’s… well, kind of weird?”

”Why? Because my brother got my best friend pregnant? No weirdness here,” she joked. Leah blushed and Rachel laughed. “Now I have another little niece or nephew on the way. Just… keep your PDA to a minimum, please.”

Jacob chuckled, “You ready to tell everyone?”

”No,” Leah said finally. “Not particularly.”

Jacob sighed and sat on the coffee table in front of the girls, facing them. “They need to find out. Sam already texted me this morning to check on you – Emily’s worried.” 

Paul joined them, Billy staying in the kitchen to read the newspaper, digest the news, consider the best time he should call Sue to discuss, and give the four of them some time to talk things out.

”I’ll do the talking if you want,” Jacob promised. 

“It’s supposed to be a nice night – mild, why don’t we get everyone together on the beach for a BBQ? It’ll give you time to tell Seth separately,” Paul offered.

“That’s a great idea,” Rachel said. “And it’ll give you both some time to process.”

Jacob leaned in and kissed her cheek before he left with Paul and Leah looked to Rachel and sighed. “It’s so early, I don’t even want to tell anyone but… the scenario is a little unique.”

”I know, but we’re all here for you. We’re your support system. Jacob loves you, Lee, and you love him. You’ll get through it.”

Leah nodded, taking her words in, feeling her chest tighten as Rachel took her hand and squeezed it reassuringly seeing the war raging behind her friend’s eyes. “I really don’t want to do this,” she groaned.

”Tell everyone?”

She nodded, “I just… I don’t want everyone to look at us and question how we’re going to do this. Just because their lives are perfect and ours are… less than ideal, it doesn’t mean we’re not going to make it work and be good parents.”

”Tell them that,” Rachel suggested. “But I don’t think anyone will question either of your ability’s to be good parents. I mean, yeah, Jake’s young, but he’s grown up a lot in the past year. A baby should seem like a piece of cake to most people in comparison to a vampire/werewolf showdown.”

Leah laughed, knowing their lives were far from normal, as were these circumstances. “Thank you,” she said softly. “For understanding.”

Rachel shrugged, “What’s done is done. Me disapproving or approving isn’t going to change the fact that you’re pregnant, so why cause you anymore stress? Do I think it’ll be… a little rocky? Probably. Relationships are a lot of work as an adult. When we were younger and you were with Sam and I was dating, things were a lot easier. Now that we’re older, there’s so much more to think about. Finances, stability, long-term projections. It’s scary for the best of us. Hell, it’s even scary for me and Paul. I think, much like my dad said, the thing people are going to bring up when you tell them will be their… worry for you both because of your unconventional start and the challenges you’ll undoubtedly face, but I don’t think they’ll bet against you figuring it out. Paul and I are here for you in any capacity you may need.”

She hugged her friend tightly, “Thanks, Rach.”

“Anytime. I want all the baby snuggles when the little guy – or girl, is here, though.”

Leah smiled as they pulled back and she nodded, “I promise.”

The girls spent the rest of the morning and most of the afternoon talking about her pregnancy, the things they needed to start thinking about, and Rachel’s upcoming nuptials and as dinnertime neared, Jacob and Paul came back. 

“Hungry?” Jacob asked, going to sit beside Leah on the couch with her and Rachel. She nodded, feeling her nerves diminished significantly from this morning being faced with telling Billy. The support was overwhelming, and just what she needed. But then another thought came back to her – Seth, and her stomach tightened with nerves again. Once everyone knew, she told herself, things would start to get better. 

Paul stood in the doorway and Rachel smiled, getting up to grab her sweater before they all left. When they got down to the beach, everyone was there, talking, laughing, horsing around, and Sam was manning the BBQ so Jared wouldn’t burn anything.

Leah went down, hand in hand with Jacob, beside Rachel, and was immediately met with silence. She didn’t have to read the guys minds to know what they were wondering. What was wrong with her? 

“Let’s go tell them all about the new wolf-chief in the making,” Jacob whispered in her ear, making her grin despite the upcoming heavy conversation.

Fortunately, she saw Seth run up as they approached the driftwood on the beach that they made makeshift furniture out of. “Leah! Mom said you wanted to talk to me before dinner?”

She shared a look with Jacob, and Rachel and Paul continued to meet up with Jared and Kim and give them some privacy. 

”When you get home there’s a little surprise,” Seth said suddenly.

”A surprise?”

He nodded, grinning ear to ear. “Abigail kind of adopted two kittens. They’re both all black and only 3 months old, but when she brought them home her mom realized she was highly allergic. It would have broken her heart to bring them back to the adoption center, so I told her we could take them.”

”So… we have two kittens at our house?”

Seth nodded, popping the ‘p’ in ‘yup.’

”Does mom know?”

”Yeah I told her earlier when she called, but she seemed… a little too calm. Like she had bigger things on her mind. Anyways, what’s up with you? Did you figure out what’s wrong?”

Jacob gestured for Seth to follow them a little way down the beach, away from the others, and he obliged. “Seth,” Leah sighed, walking slowly beside her brother. “You’re, uh, going to be an uncle.”

Seth stopped walking, not too far from the other guys – who were once again consumed with conversation and laughter. Leah turned to face him, Jacob following suit. “What?” The look on his face passed from confusion, to putting the pieces together, to immediate anger.

Seth lunged at Jacob. 

Leah stepped back, dropping Jacob’s hand as they made contact, but Seth had taken Jacob by surprise and was top of him, arms being thrown. She wanted to help but was extremely aware of the baby in her belly and couldn’t get involved. She had to be careful. Plus, Jacob was very capable. "You got my sister pregnant!?” Seth exclaimed just as Jacob overpowered him and rolled out from under him, avoiding his attempts to get anymore good hits in - but he had given him a good smack in the cheek.

As soon as Seth lunged at Jacob, the silence on the beach was palpable. They all turned, trying to see what the hell was going on. And when Seth cried out, they all heard it. Abigail – who Leah hadn’t realized was there earlier, cried out for someone to break them up.

Sam knew as soon as he saw Jacob and Seth scrapping that he should break it up, but he was completely shocked, standing motionless in front of the grill. After a minute passed, the guys still all waiting for someone to act - expecting it to be Sam, Embry got up and walked the short distance away, pulling Seth away from Jacob hesitantly as the smaller wolf continued to try to push him back down to the rocky beach floor beneath them. Jacob had practically gotten Seth away and restrained by the time Embry got there - but he wasn't giving up, so Embry held him.

"Let me go, he deserves it!" Seth cried.

"Sorry, bud," Embry held his arms. "Not until you calm down."

"I won't hit him again," he said begrudgingly, feeling the anger bubbling in his veins and red hues clouding his vision.

"You can't phase; you may hurt someone, you're too close to Leah, calm down."

Seth focused immediately on his breathing, hearing the concern for his sister, and moments later, the familiar shiver started to dissipate. Embry felt his mood shift and let him go. 

Jacob stood before Seth and sighed, rubbing his eyebrow where Seth got another good hit in. "I love your sister, Seth,” he said finally. “I know this is a shock, but we’re both committed to making this work.”

Seth didn’t know what to say, but suddenly, Sam responded. “You better.”

Paul tensed, wondering if he was going to have to pull Sam off Jacob next, but his old Alpha’s resolve was strong – probably because his own pregnant wife was beside Kim on the log, looking equally as shocked and concerned at her husband’s imminent reaction to the news.

Leah watching Jacob stand up for her made her heart clench. She walked over to where Jacob was and took his hand. "I'll be fine, I trust him."

Jacob smiled down at Leah before they walked closer to the group who were all looking at them with varying reactions. “Guess the wolf’s ‘outta the bag.”

“More like in the oven,” Jared said, trying to relieve some of the obvious tension. 

Jacob chuckled dryly but then sighed. “I know this is… well, a shock. It was for us, too, obviously, but I’m going to need everyone’s help to keep the pack running smoothly and tend to what Leah needs. Until Carlisle knows more, it seems like she’s a little higher risk than a normal pregnancy – progressing more quickly presumably because of the wolf gene. Carlisle’s going to be back weekly, so you can expect his scent and some of the other Cullen’s possibly in the coming weeks.”

“I’m only six weeks,” Leah said awkwardly, following up Jacob’s strong words. “But we knew you’d all have questions, so we want to be transparent.”

Everyone’s silence was palpable, and Leah could hear the waves crashing to shore further down the beach, feeling her palm sweating nervously in Jacobs. 

Emily got up and walked over to them, hugging Leah tightly. As Leah saw Emily’s belly this time, she felt a new flood of emotion that she tried desperately to swallow. Soon, she would be where Emily was, visibly pregnant with a protruding stomach. The thought was so foreign.

“You’re pregnant?” Emily said, pulling back to see her friend’s face. “Leah… I… wow, congratulations.” Emily was floored, but still happy for Leah and lowered her voice. “Are you… are you happy about it?” 

“I think so,” Leah admitted. “I mean, I always wanted kids, I just thought it would be under different circumstances but Jacob’s been… more amazing than I could have ever imagined.”

Jacob went over to the other guys to give them some privacy, meeting Sam at the threshold to the driftwood.

”You know how I told you my imprint isn’t like yours?” Sam nodded stiffly, still seeming like he, too, was trying to fight the urge to throw a punch as Paul took over the grill. “Alice said after last night, my and Leah’s future has merged. There is no one without the other.”

Sam tried to push away his feelings for the she-wolf and he nodded, forcing himself to extend his hand, “Congratulations.”

“Thank you,” he said, shaking his hand, knowing how difficult it was for him but grateful for him no doubt biting his tongue. 

He went to sit beside Quil on the logs with the others, opposite from Seth. “Seth-“

“I can’t believe you,” Seth said disapprovingly, his hand tightly in Abigail’s. “If you hurt her, I swear to God, Jacob-“

“I won’t, you have my word,” he said strongly before telling Seth about Alice’s words, as well.

“I don’t care about her ability to see the future,” Seth argued. “The future is always changing – so are her visions. They’re far from reliable information to start a family on.”

“We’re not relying on that,” he sighed as he saw Sam step away from the group out of his peripheral. “I’m just… hoping it will give you some peace of mind.”

“Hey, Seth,” Paul butted in as Rachel and Kim left the boys to talk and went over to join Leah and Emily. “Don’t you think they’ve got enough to deal with right now?”

“Since when do you stick up for my sister?” Seth asked, glad Abigail stayed by his side to calm him, though she looked like she desperately wanted to follow the other girls. Since finding out about the wolf-thing, though, she wanted to be a source of calmness for him, so she stayed.

“Since I’m marrying Jacob’s sister and the baby is just as much his as it is Leah’s. We’re family. By blood or not, it doesn’t matter. All of us are a family and we need to be there for each other. I know Leah’s uneasy about this and you fighting with Jacob isn’t going to help matters.”

Seth’s brow furrowed, clearly annoyed at Paul’s pragmatism. “It never occurred to you to, I don’t know, use a condom?” He asked, looking back to Jacob. 

Jacob sighed and reached up, running a hand through his hair. Out of everyone, he really didn’t think Seth would be the one to give them the hardest time of all. “Clearly not,” he replied, more annoyed than before. “Leah wasn’t supposed to be able to get pregnant.”

“Great logic,” he replied dully. “Did you skip all of the Sex-Ed classes in school?”

Actually, he kind of had, but he figured it was more of a rhetorical question from Seth’s end, so he refrained from responding. 

“Okay, okay,” Jared jumped in. “Do you not think he’s already beaten himself up enough over this? I’m not sure if you noticed, but your sister looks exhausted. I’m sure it’s been rough news, let’s cut them some slack.”

“He didn’t knock up your sister, did he?” Seth asked angrily. “I’m not overreacting here – you’re all brushing this off and it’s not something you can just say oh well, whoops. It’s a baby.”

“A baby that’s already been made,” Jacob said curtly. “So regardless of your opinion, I hope for Leah’s sake, you’ll humor us and try to be supportive.”

Seth squirmed under Jacob’s gaze and sighed, letting his eyes wander over to where the girls were all talking, looking pretty excited. He still didn’t look happy about it himself, but he knew Leah would need him - in case Jacob fucked up again somewhere down the road. “Fine.”

“Woah, you two move quickly,” Kim giggled. “Congratulations.”

Leah, trying to mitigate everyone’s emotions amongst her own right now, even hugged Kim since she wasn’t annoying her as much as usual lately. 

“A little niece or nephew,” Rachel squealed joyfully. “I can’t wait! We’re practically sisters now.”

Leah laughed, but Rachel’s smile fell as she realized Emily shifted uncomfortably at her words. “I should go talk to Seth,” Leah said, watching the pretty intense-looking conversation from the sidelines. 

She excused herself from the girls surprising excitement but when she turned around to head back over with the guys, she noticed Sam wasn’t there. Emily did, too, and gave Leah a sad, apologetic smile and Leah turned to scan the beach. Paul continued flipping burgers and handing them out when they were ready and although Leah actually was getting hungry, she wanted to face Sam herself with her news. It hadn’t occurred to her that this would cause bad-blood because they had been doing so well – and he was so incredibly happy with Emily and the imminent arrival of their own baby.

She caught a glimpse of him further down the beach. The sun was setting, throwing beautiful shades of red, orange, and yellow across the sky, reflecting in the water below and Leah walked down, away from the others, to sit beside him on the driftwood. “This seat taken?” She asked lamely, giving him a small smile as he looked up to her and moved over to give her some space.

“Congratulations,” he said softly, not meeting her eyes as he looked out over the horizon.

“Thank you,” she said gently, feeling the slight awkwardness bubbling between them. “Sam-“

“No, I’m sorry,” he turned to face her, confliction in his eyes. “It’s not my place to be anything but happy for you, and I am,” he promised. “I just… wasn’t expecting that.”

“I’m sorry for not telling you privately,” she admitted, not realizing it would affect him near as much as it obviously was.

“Don’t be, we didn’t even tell you ourselves.”

She shrugged, “Probably for the best. Hearing it from Jacob was easier.”

He ran a hand through his short hair. “I’m so happy with Emily – I love her, and I can’t wait to have a family of my own. Be the dad I never had.” He met her gaze again and she didn’t feel the usual butterflies she had before. “I just wish things had ended better between us.”

Leah wasn’t really sure what to say, and she frowned, “You did your best.”

“It wasn’t good enough.”

Hearing him say that made her heart sad, but it didn’t affect her like it would have months ago. She had a new inspiration in her life – the baby her and Jacob made in her belly. It gave her a new perspective on things and what really mattered. She reached over to put her hand over Sam’s and frowned. “We should both be excited. We’re having the families we always dreamed of. I know it turned out much differently than either of us expected, I appreciate that, but there’s nothing to be sad about. Our past was amazing, it just wasn’t our future.” She remembered him telling her something along those lines at his wedding and although back then it was like a knife to her heart, saying them now felt comforting. “We’re both going to care about each other, probably forever, but I know Emily makes you happy and I’m grateful you have her. Jacob makes me happy, too. After we broke up… I didn’t think I’d ever feel those butterflies again; but Jacob makes me feel like a lovesick teenager again. It may be different than how we expected it to be, but I think we’re right where we’re supposed to be.”

Sam smiled and nodded, “I think you’re right, just hearing you say you’re pregnant… It was nostalgic. I needed a minute.”

Leah nodded, looking back out at the waves before smirking, “A lot different hearing that word now than a few years ago huh?”

Sam chuckled and nodded. “My heart almost beat right out of my chest. We were over there,” he pointed farther down the beach, farther away from everyone. “When you texted me to meet you here after school, I had no idea what was going on.”

Leah felt a warmth rise in her chest at the memory. “I thought you were going to freak out.”

“Really?”

She shrugged, “We were young. I was late. Seems typical to freak out. Hell, I’m pregnant now and I think I’m more freaked out than I was back then. Thankfully, Jacob’s been amazing the past twenty-four hours because I’ve been a pretty big wreck.”

“You seem fine now,” Sam said honestly. 

“Getting there. It’s a shock, obviously, but we love each other and we’ll figure it out.”

“You’re going to be a great mom.”

The words caused her eyes to well with tears, and Sam frowned, but she waved off his concern. “Stupid hormones.”

They both laughed, and she got up, extending her hand to him. “Let’s go back with the others. Hopefully Seth hasn’t tried to kill Jacob again.”

He took her hand, got up, and they walked side by side in a comfortable silence back to the others. He slipped beside Emily, giving her a strong smile and kissing her cheek as Leah sat by Jacob, giving him a reassuring smile before leaning into his warmth as the wind blew through. He handed her a burger and she leaned into him to keep warm. For the first time in the last day, she finally felt at peace – and starving.

The rest of the night went off without a hitch – though she assumed she would have damage control to do with Seth when they all got back to the house. Abigail was apparently staying over, so she was hopeful his imprint would calm him enough to have a rational conversation later. Come to think of it, she never did find out how Abigail took the whole wolf-thing and made a mental note to ask him later in private. They were getting ready to leave when Paul spoke up to the guys.

“We’re having a men-only party – with everything going on, we didn’t really get to celebrate Sam and Emily’s baby-news, so let’s get the guys together, have some drinks, and have a last hurrah before you and him are too busy changing diapers.”

Jacob hesitated, but Quil spoke. “It will be good to destress.”

“Fine, when?”

“Next weekend night?”

“Go and have fun,” Emily kissed Sam’s cheek, winking to the girls. “We can have a girl’s night at my place. Alcohol-free.”

“Speak for yourselves,” Rachel giggled. “More for me I guess.”

“And me,” Kim added happily.

They all parted, and Seth, Jacob, Leah, and Abigail walked back to the house in awkward silence. When they got home, they all entered the living room and Leah sighed. “Can we talk without you trying to kill Jake?”

Getting comfortable, Leah curled next to Jacob on the love seat and Seth took his spot on the couch next to Abigail and he sighed. “Does Renesmee know?”

Jacob nodded, “She was at Carlisle’s and overheard.”

“And how did that go?”

“She respects my decision to be with Leah and understands my loyalties,” he explained. That was the simple answer, at least. Leah knew there would be further Renesmee damage control coming from what Jacob told her, but that was a thought for later. 

Seth turned to look at his sister, “You’re really okay with this?”

Leah nodded, “I’m excited. Honestly. There will be an adjustment period – it barely feels real, but I want you to be supportive.”

Seth met Leah’s eyes for a moment before nodding. He got up and extended his hand to Jacob, “Take care of my sister.”

Jacob reached out and shook it, “You have no worries.”

Seth nodded, hugging his sister tightly before him and Abigail retired to the couch downstairs to watch a movie. 

“That wasn’t terrible,” Leah said awkwardly.

“The day went… fairly well,” Jacob agreed, wrapping his arms around her on the couch.

She snuggled into his chest and smiled, “Maybe this won’t be a big mess after all.”

“We’ll be fine. What did Sam say to you?”

“Congratulations,” she said, looking up into Jacob’s pools of brown. “It was quite civil.”

He smirked and leaned down, pressing his lips to hers gently. “Good, because you’re mine now and I don’t like to share.”

Leah laughed, rolling her eyes. “Neither do I.”

\--

A week later, Jacob was on his fourth beer when he felt his phone buzz. He looked down, seeing Renesmee’s name across his screen as a text message and hesitated before opening it. Leah may have to share his attention with Renesmee, but his love was hers and he didn’t want to do anything to make her question that moving forward.

I miss you.

Jacob sighed, and, against his better judgement and trying to be a good man for Leah, he put his phone back in his pocket and tried to figure out the best way to mediate this entire situation. He had put it off thus far, but Renesmee wasn’t going anywhere and he had to be able to at least talk to her platonically – but he wanted Leah to understand. Texting her while drinking wasn’t the answer. It would be a tricky topic to breach and one he knew he was losing time at initiating to ensure the best outcome.

He ignored the text as the guys all poured up some Jager bomb shots and a few shots later, he felt his phone buzz again. Checking to make sure it wasn’t Leah; he took his phone back out and sighed. Renesmee again.

Jake?

“What’s up, Leah can’t go without you for one night?” Embry teased as Jacob stared at the small screen and took a swig of beer before putting his phone back in his pocket without responding.

“It’s Renesmee.”

“How’s the balancing act going?”

“It’s not. I’ve pretty much cut off all communication with Renesmee since she’s left to focus on Leah and the baby – aside from when I told her about the pregnancy, and she was upset. I haven’t even really been able to talk to her about that though, since I don’t want to hurt Leah.”

“So you’re just… ignoring Renesmee?”

“Kind of,” he admitted. “Either way, I’m a jerk. Leah’s been through a lot the past few weeks, so I really don’t want to ask if she minds me talking to Renesmee right now. But I know Renesmee is going to want to talk about the baby and I don’t know if I’m ready to deal with her feelings on it. We’re only now getting used to the idea of being parents soon without bringing her feelings into the mix.”

“Did you ever think that when you and Leah first slept together that this would be your reality?”

Jacob chuckled, “No, not in a million years. I knew it… well, probably wasn’t the smartest idea at the time and something would make us realize that, but I really didn’t expect for us to fall in love and end up with a baby on the way.”

“Well, grab a shot, return Renesmee’s text and tell her you’re out with the guys, and then you can go home to Leah later and talk to her about all of this tomorrow. But for tonight, no more women,” he hit his arm teasingly, gave him a shot, took one for himself, clinked glasses, and they both downed the liquid.

Jacob felt a series of buzzes coming from his phone again only a minute later, before even getting a chance to return her message with something ominous and distant, signifying a call coming through: Renesmee

Deciding he should answer, he hit talk, “Hey, sorry, Ness. Is everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine,” Renesmee’s voice said softly. “Can we talk?”

“I’m actually just out with the guys right now,” he said suddenly. “Can I call you later?”

“Yeah, sure.”

“Night, Ness.”

“Night.”

He hung up and stuffed his phone back into his pocket. He knew she was probably disappointed, but what was he supposed to do here? Getting drunk with the guys and talking to his ex, no matter how innocent, still looked bad. He felt bad for brushing Renesmee off, but he didn’t have a choice right now. He quickly texted Leah to check in – who assured him she was fine and still with Emily, Rachel, and Kim, and then went back to trying to live in the moment with the guys.

“You know what would be the icing on the cake?” Jared teased. “If you and Leah have a boy and him and Sam’s daughter fall in love!”

Sam groaned, and Jacob sighed, “Not funny.”

“Pretty funny,” Paul defended his friend. 

Seth was saying goodbye to the younger wolves who had school the next day and Jacob went over, “Hey.”

Seth gave him a sidelong glance before going back over to sit on the couch alone.

“You can’t still be mad,” Jacob sighed, following him.

“You got my sister pregnant.”

“And we’re actually pretty happy about it,” Jacob defended.

Seth looked over to Jacob as he sat down beside him, “It’s weird. We were practically family before all of this happened. We grew up together – you’re like my brother and now you’re… well, the father of my niece or nephew. Weird.”

“I appreciate that, but, I think our similarities are what makes us a good fit, don’t you?”

Seth hesitated, “It’s not that you’re not a good fit – I see how happy you are together, I just think it’s weird. But…” Seth trailed off and Jacob raised a brow. “Dad would be happy.”

He was clearly caught off-guard, “What?”

“Dad always loved you. Always said what ‘a good kid’ you were and how Billy should be proud. I think, despite how all of this happened, he would be proud of my sister being with you.”

“Did you tell Leah that?”

“Yeah – she started crying,” Seth chuckled, feeling the familiar friendship kindling between them again. “She blames the pregnancy hormones, but I think it’s just her soft-spot for dad.”

“I’m sure it meant a lot,” he responded. “It means a lot to me, too. Admittedly, facing your dad and telling him I got Leah pregnant would have been… well, fucking scary, but I would do it ten times over if he could be here for you guys.”

Seth smiled, “Thanks, Jake.”

Silence hung between them, and Seth awkwardly fidgeted with his hands. He sensed the opportunity he had here with Jacob trying to make amends with him and realized he could use it to his advantage with a problem he had been toying with. “Can I ask you something? Between us?” 

“Of course,” Jacob said, wanting to get back in Seth’s good graces. “What’s up?”

“Seriously – don’t tell the other guys. Or Leah.”

He wasn’t a huge fan of not telling Leah, but he remembered back to when Rachel promised not to tell their dad or Paul about her walking in on him and Leah back at the cliffs – it seemed like years ago, now, and took this as a relationship-building moment. “I promise.”

Seth avoided Jacob’s gaze and he saw his cheeks flush. “Do you still have the condoms Billy gave you?”

Oh, no, this was bad. His promise to secrecy didn’t extend to helping facilitate his girlfriend’s little brother have sex, did it? The guys had raked him over the coals with humor because of Billy’s initial concern in his sexual escapades – rightly so, in hindsight. Teenage boys were stupid when it came to sex, but the entire pack knew about his dad’s care package and teased him about it frequently – more so now that he didn’t use them and ended up in the situation he was in, so it made sense that Seth knew about it.

He cleared his throat, “Uh, yeah, why? You and Abigail aren’t…?”

Seth was fifteen. When you look back on prior teenage years, you always seem so young and inexperienced. Even now, with Bella, he felt like he had been another person – younger, more naive and less mature than he was now, and it wasn’t that long ago. But at fifteen? With Bella? He couldn’t deny the emotional and physical attachment he felt for her. If she had chosen him, who knew if he would have waited for an ‘appropriate’ age. Jacob knew from talking to Leah that she had lost her virginity to Sam only a week before her sixteenth birthday after dating for almost a year. Was it young? Yeah, but not when you were living it. After all, Bella had become a mom and a wife before her ninetieth birthday. Thanks to their supernatural ability, they were all far from normal teenagers.

“No,” Seth said quickly. “Not yet. I just want to be prepared.”

Jacob exhaled a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding. “I’ll bring them over to the house next time I visit Billy’s.”

Seth finally looked over to meet Jacob’s eyes, “Thanks, man. I think mom knows everyone who works here in the drugstores…”

“No sweat, but Seth? I know you’re imprinted – I get it, but just… make sure you’re both ready, okay?”

“That’s what I’m doing,” he said finally. “I’ll be prepared-“

“Not just with condoms,” he kept his voice low, the other guys too caught up in having a good time to really pay much attention to them. “Emotionally. Sex is complicated.”

“All you guys talk about is how great it is,” he countered. “And make jokes about it. I seem to remember you claiming it was ‘just sex’ with Leah.”

“And I found out the hard way how emotional it can get with your sister,” he said, seeing Seth squirm at the change of topic. “It was fun, but it got really serious, really quickly. You don’t share those experiences with someone without it affecting you. Yeah, it feels good, and the guys aren’t going to sit here and tell you how vulnerable it makes you, or how meaningful it is – we’re guys, but it isn’t just physical.” He felt the need to be there for him in the absence of Harry, but it was still awkward.

“I love Abigail,” Seth said finally. “And we’re imprinted, I’ll be fine.”

“I know imprinting… well, solidifies the connection. I get that, so maybe it feels like a little less pressure because you know you’re a good, long-term match, but just be sure you’re both ready.”

“Thanks, I got it from here.”

Jacob nodded and Paul came over, giving both of them a shot of whiskey that Jacob gladly took. He wasn’t sure how many more he had afterwards, but he awoke on the couch at the cabin around 3 AM. and his stomach lurched. He scrambled off the couch and over a few of the guys passed out bodies and emptied his stomach outside, over the banister and into the bushes. Guys night was a success, but his stomach begged to differ.

He sat outside on the steps off the cabin, thinking back to his favorite childhood memories there with his parents and sisters before retiring back inside and to an actual bed this time.

\--

Leah was up early the next morning. Thankfully, her nausea stayed at-bay and she managed to eat some toast and peanut butter along with some fruit for breakfast before hearing a knock on the door. She assumed it was Jacob for someone to be there this early, but he had the spare key and he wouldn’t knock.

She went out to the porch and opened the door, seeing Jeremy. “Hey, sorry, I know it’s early, but-“

“Come in,” Leah said, seeing an urgency playing over his features.

He obliged and stepped inside, and then sighed, “I was hoping you could do me a huge favor. I know it’s probably not right to even ask considering everything between us but-“

“What is it?” Leah said, brow furrowed as she reached out to touch his hand to try and calm him.

“I need someone to watch Mikayla. I tried my ex, who she knows, but she’s out of town and my mom is meeting me at the hospital. I don’t have anyone else that I’d be comfortable to ask.”

“Of course, anytime,” she promised, looking out the window to see her in the backseat of his vehicle in the driveway. “What’s wrong?”

“Jamie,” he sighed. “She got, uh, less than good news on a scan she got back and Mikayla’s spent so much time in hospitals and I really don’t want her to see Jamie in one.”

“Is she okay??”

Jeremy ran a hand through his hair and sighed, “Her mammogram came back showing precancerous cells. It’s early, but she’s a wreck – Hell, I’m a wreck, mom’s a wreck. I’ve already been through cancer with Mikayla and I’m trying to keep her as healthy as I can now and on the path through remission and I can’t have her finding out about Jamie.”

“I’m so sorry,” she said, feeling her heart drop to her stomach. Children. That’s what she had to deal with - protecting a baby, from things she may never expect. She hoped her wolf genes prevented any illnesses, but it was something else she filed away in her mind to worry about later. “I’m sure she’ll be okay – you said they caught it early, right?”

He nodded, “Yeah. They said they can do treatment, but she’s struggling with the idea of going through what she watched Mikayla go through.”

“I’m here if you need anything, okay?” Leah vowed. “I can entertain Mikayla for the day, you go be with Jamie.”

Jeremy gave her a thankful smile before he nodded, “I owe you.”

“What are friends for?”

She was suddenly very thankful that she met the little girl previously – it made this situation much less awkward. Jeremy went out and brought Mikayla in with a bag of things to keep her busy.

“Hey, Leah?” Jeremy said before he left, after they set her up on her iPad on the couch.

“Yeah?”

“Did you ever find out why you were sick?”

She thought back to her and Jeremy’s last conversation, and she hesitated, walking over to walk him to the door. “Uh, yeah. I think I’m going to have to sit the recital out – if you’re still doing it.”

“We are,” he said. “Jamie won’t give up the recital for anything, but I get it. You’re pregnant, aren’t you?”

Leah’s brow furrowed, “How did you know?”

“Saw the same signs in you as I did with Mikayla’s mom. Congratulations.”

Leah gave him an awkward smile, “Thanks.”

“Is Jacob happy?”

“We’re getting there. It’s been shocking, to say the least, but we’re happy.”

“How far along?”

“Ten weeks,” Leah lied.

It was only about a week since her trip to Carlisle’s, but if they were going with the quickened pregnancy rate she was probably closer to eight than seven now. Plus, she counted back quickly to make sure the timing added up to before her and Jeremy were exclusive, so he didn’t think differently of her. After all, she promised him her and Jacob weren’t sleeping together when they were together, and she didn’t want to screw that up. One week had proven a big change, though, with her and Jacob’s relationship solidifying entirely and her body starting to change more as the days passed by. They had tried to keep the conversation light for the past week to try and settle into the news, but she knew they had things to discuss sooner rather than later. 

Jeremy must have been dating it in his head, too, because he paused before nodding, looking to her stomach briefly. “Guess it’s a good thing we broke up when we did?”

She laughed, though knew she hadn’t actually been pregnant then. “I guess so.”

He gave her a thankful smile for watching Mikayla again before she went back inside with her and made her a snack. The rest of the morning was full of laughter from the younger girl as Leah amused her, played games, took her to the park, and made sure she was completely at ease. She didn’t know anything about Jamie’s condition – rightly so, and she wanted to protect her from the news just as much as Jeremy did.

They were just coming back from the park and stepped in through the back door when Leah saw Jacob and Seth rustling through the kitchen.

“Go and play on your iPad for a bit, okay?”

The little girl, who was completely in love with Leah, nodded and went into the living room to play by herself. Jacob gave her a weird look, as did Seth, and he raised a brow. “Okay, the pregnancy didn’t go that quickly,” he said. “So, who’s that?”

“Jeremy’s daughter,” Leah said awkwardly as Seth put a toaster strudel in the toaster. 

“Oh?”

“He asked for a favor – and he knows about us and the pregnancy, don’t worry,” she said, trying to ease Jacob’s mind considering she was looking after her ex-boyfriend’s kid. “He had a medical situation to tend to with his family and he didn’t know who else to ask.”

Jacob nodded, feeling the haunting of ex’s coming into their lives, but trusting her as he wished she did for him. Maybe this would be a good time to bring up Renesmee, actually. “Gotcha.”

“Did you have a good night?”

He nodded, walking over and taking her into his arms. He smelled like alcohol, and she felt the smell turn her stomach. “Okay,” she pulled away. “You need to shower.”

He chuckled before running his hands up her sides, and gently grazing her belly where he felt the very small protrusion. It was barely noticeable a week ago – an extremely small food baby with her lean frame, but a week even made a difference. Now that the medication had been working and she was able to eat, her tiny belly pushed outward just enough to make her belly button raise outward and a small bump to start forming. You’d never see it in clothing, but Jacob liked to run his fingers over her bare belly frequently. It also unnerved him a little, though.

“Will do, boss,” he smirked. “We can talk more later.”

“Everything alright?”

“Fine, just want to hear about your night.”


	18. Ready

“So… what do we do now?” Leah asked meekly, her head laying on Jacob’s chest on her bed. All the things her and Emily talked about the night before – baby gear, labor, finances, were weighing heavily on her mind amongst others. Jeremy had come to get Mikayla earlier and assured her things would be fine. She offered to babysit for him or help in anyway he needed moving forward and Jacob had finally showered off the remaining smell of alcohol from the night before, soothing her nausea at being close to him.

“The same thing we usually do… in addition to getting ready for a baby, I guess.”

Leah sighed, “Mom’s got my and Seth’s old crib downstairs in the storage room.”

“See, one thing down already.” He was trying to be optimistic, but his own nerves seeped into his tone.

Leah shifted so she was laying on her belly so she could see his face. “Jacob, I’m serious, we don’t have to do this,” the words killed her to say – she wanted to be a mom for so long, and although they had been doing well the past week, there was still so much they had to do and talk about and prepare for – things they couldn’t even imagine.

Jacob shook his head. “We got ourselves into this mess, we’re going to get through it together. Plus, you heard Old Quil, we’re going to create a super-wolf,” his tone was lighter, more teasing, but Leah knew that he was still scared. It was hard not to be. He was only seventeen – a thought not lost on her. She ignored the age difference thus far because of his emotional maturity, but a baby was a different story. Although she had been only a year older than him when she had her first and only pregnancy scare, they had been under vastly different circumstances. 

“I’m going to be twenty-one in July,” she said softly. “You’re only seventeen-“

“And how many seventeen year old’s do you know that run a wolf pack? You can’t sit there and tell me I’m a normal seventeen-year-old.”

A smirk pulled at the corners of her lips, “Definitely not normal, no.” She paused for a moment and sighed. “I just… don’t want you to think about having a baby as lost opportunities.”

“I don’t think that,” he argued. “Not at all. I was never going to college, Leah. Nowhere elite, anyways. Renesmee and I were never end-game. I was probably never even going to leave La Push since I had to take care of dad. I had no real ambitions past graduating high school. The best thing I’ve ever done was take your clothes off the night of Sam and Emily’s wedding, because it led us to this.” He intertwined his fingers with hers, and although she knew she should be pleased at his words, a frown played on her lips. “What’s wrong?”

She shook her head, “Nothing. I finally thought that I had things figured out – with school, and all, and now I’m just more confused than ever.”

“No one expects you to know where to go from here. We just have to try and do this together and take it a day at a time.” She listened and nodded, but fell silent, and Jacob sighed. “Okay, humor me for a minute. If we were together say, another two years; if I managed to convince you that Renesmee was a non-issue, with no baby in the mix, realistically, when do you think you’d want kids?”

Leah’s brow furrowed and she shrugged, “Probably as soon as I was done school.”

“And that would be what, four years?” She nodded. “I’d be your age now – probably still not ready to be a dad. You’d be newly graduated, settling into a job, and probably not wanting to take any maternity leave because you would just be getting your feet wet, right? So, what’s the difference between now and then, really? How is it any more ideal or less complicated?”

“I’d have an education,” she said firmly. “And we would… I don’t know, have more time; be able to explore us and what our relationship means. Have more money.”

“I’ve known you since I was born,” he countered. “I think we know each other pretty well – especially since you joined my pack. We’ve literally shared a mind. How much closer can two people get between that and sharing physical intimacy? I told you, I’ll figure out something financially. I’ll work on some cars on the reservation for some cash in the meantime. We’ll figure out school for you, I promise.”

“I don’t know,” she said, growing annoyed at his pragmatism. “I just know that we’re not ready for this.”

“And we don’t have a choice on how ready we feel, but you stressing out anymore than necessary isn’t any good for you – or the baby.”

She looked up at the ceiling and rubbed her face. “I’m allowed to be stressed and nervous and unsure. We haven’t even discussed Renesmee’s feelings since we found out.”

It was probably a little different for him in this than Leah considering the baby was in her stomach and not his. Other than the little picture, he had no indication of anything being any different in his life. Leah, on the other hand, was sick, exhausted, and had a sore back – and was incredibly moody (more so than usual) and was still dealing with the whole Renesmee thing. There was a reason even happily married couples like Sam and Emily struggled with pregnancy – it was hard. Sam had tried to give him helpful advice the past week, but he was only realizing how even more unprepared that he was. He was really glad she had brought it up, but now that she had he felt a little nauseous himself at asking her if it was okay for him to contact her. His urge to make her feel entirely at ease won out, and he dropped the ask. He wanted her to feel entirely sure in them before he asked such a thing and it was clear she was still wary. He couldn’t blame her.

He sighed, “You can use me as a punching bag all you want, Leah, but you’re forgetting that I also told Renesmee I wanted to be with you – and told her we were having a baby together. That kind of thing, regardless of her feelings, kind of cements things, don’t you think?”

“I’m just saying,” she said through tight lips. “That it doesn’t have to.”

“I want it to,” he promised as he shifted and reached down, gently pulling her head into his lap and gingerly moving his fingers through her hair. “I’m scared, obviously, but I love you, and I know you love me, and we’re going to be fine; baby and all.”

“What if I’m not a good mom?” Leah’s voice was small, and Jacob looked incredulously at her for a moment as she inspected her nails, avoiding his gaze.

“Do you really think you won’t be a good mom?” He asked finally, causing her to look up at him, briefly meeting his confused gaze. 

She shrugged, “I haven’t necessarily been the most pleasant person to be around.”

“That’s the past,” he argued. “You’ve come a long way. You were hurt-“

“Do you know the first thing that came to my mind when my mom told me about Emily’s accident?”

The question took him off guard again. He realized there had been so much more going through Leah’s head than he originally anticipated and was even more glad that he hadn’t asked about his desire to speak with his imprint yet. “No, but I’d like to know.”

She sighed looked out the window of her bedroom, watching the trees on the front lawn sway gently as she spoke, “I was relieved.” Her voice was so small that if Jacob hadn’t of had wolf hearing, he wouldn’t have heard her. “Relieved. My cousin and ex-best friend got ‘mauled by a bear’,” she quoted the lie they told people. “And I was relieved.”

Jacob’s brow furrowed, “Relieved?”

She nodded, still training her gaze out the window to avoid the judgement in his eyes. “She was hanging out with Sam. Everyone knew that. I went off on her a few days before the attack when I found out he was going to see her. I was so mad and confused and upset. She was supposed to be my friend, but instead of being here with me to comfort me when I lost Sam, she was sneaking around with him. When I realized he was pursuing her, I resented her even though she promised me it was nothing. When my mom told me about the accident I thought, just maybe, if something happened to her, Sam would come back to me. It was fleeting. I was relieved, then worried, and then felt like a terrible person for even having that thought, then relieved that she was okay, then mad again when she called me and told me she was accepting Sam’s feelings.” Leah looked back to Jacob, tears rimming her eyes. “What kind of fucked up person thinks that way? Upset or not, that’s… terrible.”

Jacob took a deep breath and reached over to put a hand on hers as he let it out. The guys knew she was heartbroken over Sam, but she held the true magnitude of her heart from them and Jacob was amazed at just how deeply Sam really had hurt the beautiful woman that was now his. It made him mad even after everything that had happened that allowed her to move on. “Leah, you can’t blame yourself for being mad. That is all it was, you were hurt and acting irrationally. If something had of happened to Emily, you would not have been relieved.”

“That’s what I told myself,” she said dully, gulping the lump in her throat back. “But even after she got out of the hospital, the scars reminded me of that small feeling of relief. That small hope I had of getting Sam back – at the cost of my cousin’s life and how even if it was only for a brief moment, I wanted it.”

Jacob hesitated and continued to run his fingers soothingly through her hair. “When Bella was pregnant, a thought I had was once the baby killed her, I would be so glad that I could finally rip Edward to pieces. I know it wasn’t the same as wishing ill on her, because I didn’t want that, but I know the… joy I felt in that scenario – if she did die, just so I could finally destroy him. I get the darkness. I’ve lived in the darkness. But bad thoughts don’t determine us – it’s our actions. You didn’t go and pull Emily off life support. You didn’t attack her. You… simply saw an opportunity when you were hurting to stop that hurt and wished for it. It’s human. It’s not a pretty part of humanity, but we’re just trying to figure shit out. Emotions make us act irrationally sometimes and I know that you’d never wish anyone dead. Not really – not in your right mind. Especially not Emily.”

Leah smiled up at him as a tear leaked from her eye and he wiped it away. “I love you.”

He smiled, leaning down to brush a kiss to her lips. “I love you, too. The fact that you feel so deeply means that you’re going to be a wonderful mom. Fierce. Protective. Scary sometimes,” he chuckled. 

Leah closed her eyes, a smile playing at the corners of her lips as she inhaled his cologne. “I’m sorry for being such a bitch.”

“You are apologizing for being a bitch?” He smirked, “You really must not be feeling well.”

Leah grinned, looking up into his familiar pools of brown. “Your spawn has me feeling all kinds of things – unwell is definitely one of them.”

“Our spawn,” he said firmly. 

He watched as she gingerly ran her fingers over her tummy. She grew quiet again, which was actually characteristic for her the past week – she had a lot to digest and wrap her head around and when he was with her, he made sure that he used her silence to try and cheer her up. Of course, he had his own weak moments, but for her sake, he kept those between him and Billy. 

“I can’t believe there’s a baby in there,” she whispered.

“You will when you can’t tie your shoes,” he teased. 

“Guess you’re going to be useful for lots of things.”

“Professional shoe-tier, nail painter, and leg shaver at your disposal,” he mused, thinking back to Sam telling him only weeks prior on patrol how Emily had trouble shaving her legs now – and painting her toenails. Husbandly duties, he had called them. 

Leah laughed, “I think I’ll manage shaving, but thanks for the offer.”

“You may feel differently when you’re nine months pregnant and your legs are hairier than mine.”

She snorted, “Not possible.”

“Do you want a boy or girl?”

The question took her by surprise, and she sighed. “I don’t know. I haven’t really come to terms with the fact that I’m having a baby, let alone the gender.”

“I think it’ll be a boy,” he said proudly.

She grinned, “Oh yeah, why’s that?”

“Well, Old Quil did say what a bad ass wolf it’ll be –“

“Hey!” Leah cried, sitting up to face him. “I’m a bad ass wolf.”

“But imagine the Alpha male wolf we would make.”

“What if all of the pack’s offspring never stops phasing?”

Jacob quirked a brow. “What do you mean, with the Cullen’s gone, as usual-“

“Renesmee,” she stated firmly. “You and she will always have to keep in contact - visit each other, to satisfy the imprint, romantic or not. The reservation won’t be vamp-free as long as that’s happening.”

Jacob rubbed the back of his neck, “I can always go to her so she doesn’t come here and risk anymore phasing.”

Leah knew it was a sound reasoning, but it also meant she would be left alone periodically, probably every month or so for at least a few days to raise their child. It was a small sacrifice – one many people made when their significant others worked away and such, but she hated the thought of him leaving her with their family to go see her. 

Jacob seemed to understand her internal conflict, and he sighed. “How about we focus on having this baby, before we focus on it turning into a wolf in it’s teens?” He sighed, “Why don’t we cash in that rain cheque for that dinner I still owe you?”

“A date, considering you’ve already knocked me up, is a moot point now, don’t you think?”

Jacob shrugged, “A proper date can’t hurt and technically, you were knocked up when I offered, too, we just didn’t know it.”

She grinned, “Do you want to know my favorite color? Food?”

“Blue and hamburgers. And pizza.”

Leah smiled, but rolled her eyes. “Favorite hobby?”

“Me,” he grinned cockily, earning him a smack on the arm – though they both knew he wasn’t necessarily wrong. He contemplated a moment before answering, “You used to like reading when we were younger, but I haven’t seen you read much lately.”

Leah couldn’t say that she was unimpressed. Even the small, trivial things he knew. It also occurred to her that her being an avid reader before wasn’t something he would have necessarily picked up by sharing a mind with her. Her favorite color and food were kind of pack-knowledge considering they usually shared small talk during patrol, but reading was something he had picked up on before they started phasing, which told her there had always been a small part of him that was interested in her - or at least noticed her.

His voice broke her out of her contemplation, “Okay, my turn. What’s my favorite color?”

“Red.”

“Food?”

Leah hesitated, “Same as mine?”

“Close but the number one is spaghetti. Mom used to make deadly spaghetti. Rachel thinks she can make it just as good, but it’s not the same. Don’t tell her I said that, though.” He winked playfully. “Well, I already know your favorite ice cream, so, uh, favorite cookie?”

“Cookie?” She looked at him speculatively. 

“Favorite junk food items are especially telling about character – though I still think you got the vanilla ice cream wrong.”

She laughed, her head resting on his chest. “Chocolate chip.”

“What about Oreos!?”

“I take it they’re your favorite?”

“Okay, tell me one of your favorite things that isn’t entirely cliché.”

“Vanilla ice cream and chocolate chip cookies aren’t cliché, they’re classic! Maybe if you were older, you’d understand…” Jacob flicked her nose playfully, but honestly? The thought of teasing him about his age seemed a little mean now that he was proving to be more of a man than men twice his age. Age aside, he had stepped up to be the person she needed right now effortlessly and his desire to approach parenthood with her was extremely mature – and sexy. Age wasn’t always a determining factor of someone’s character. 

“Maybe if you were younger and more adventurous, you’d have better taste when it comes to sweets.”

“I don’t think it’s fair to question my spontaneity considering how we got together.”

“Maybe so, but when it comes to food, you’re a Plain Jane.” She rolled her eyes. “Who was your first celebrity crush?”

Leah blushed, “Don’t make fun?”

“Oh, this should be good,” he sat up a little to see her face more easily as a smirk filled his lips.

“Ron Weasley.”

“Rupert Grint!?”

“He’s so cute and funny and sweet as Ron,” she defended.

“Well I feel a little better now.”

“What?”

“He’s also younger than you, so maybe your hang-up on age is even more invalid that I originally thought.”

“In case you’ve forgotten, he’s still two years older than you. He’ll be nineteen in August.”

“Ooh, she knows his birthday and all, folks! Must have had it bad for Weasley, huh? 

“How do you know everyone’s age?”

“Until Bella came back to Forks, I didn’t have much else to do but be a typical fifteen-year-old and watch movies and play video games. And I do love Harry Potter. Mom used to read it to us growing up.”

Leah grinned, “How is that any different than what you do now?” She teased. 

“My interests are more… broad now,” his eyes were glistening with devilish desire. “Wanna role play? I can see if I can find a red wig and you can put on one of Hermione’s Hogwarts robes,” he winked. “I’m a true Gryffindor.”

Admittedly, the idea wasn’t repulsive to her. Then again, any chance to get physical with Jacob was enticing and they hadn’t been together sexually since before they found out about the pregnancy. “Okay, who was your first crush?” She countered, trying to keep her head out of the gutter and avoid just how amused she was at their banter.

“As sexy as Emma Watson is,” he teased. “I’ve gotta go with Mila Kunis. Much more my type.”

Leah laughed, “Fair, but I think I just figured out our first real movie date.”

“Hm?”

“The Order of the Phoenix movies comes out in July, so mark your calendar, Black.”

He leaned down and kissed her gently before glancing over to the clock on her nightstand and sighed, “You’re on, but I’ve ‘gotta go relieve Seth.” He shuffled and got up off the bed before leaning down to press his lips to hers. “I’ll be back after patrol, once I shower and grab some stuff.”

“You should probably start bringing more of your things over,” she said idly. “I mean… if you’re really intent on watching me through this entire pregnancy. I’m thinking you’re starting to inherit some of Edward’s creepy tendencies, though. If I wake up and you’re staring at me, you’re bunking with Seth.”

She tried to joke it off, but Jacob smiled at the seriousness that her words implied – moving in. “I’ll have to okay it with Billy first,” he joked, earning him a grin. “I’ll be back tonight. Rest, okay?” He left and Leah fell back on her bed, sighing.

Fortunately for her, despite it being mid-day, she did fall asleep and was grateful for the rest. When she awoke, it was early evening. She probably could have even slept later, if not for a cramping sensation stirring her awake. Her brow furrowed. They weren’t bad, but noticeable. She turned over in bed, but couldn’t get comfy, and decided to go freshen up in the bathroom. 

When another half an hour passed and the cramping continued to come and go, she got worried. She reached into her pocket and dialled Jacob’s number, but sighed when she heard it ringing on the other side of her room – on the window ledge. He must have forgotten it.  
Leah decided to go do a quick lap around, but felt the cramping worsen and really started to panic. They usually met at the beach, now, in efforts not to wake Leah if she was sleeping – Jacob was taking this protecting her thing seriously. She managed to walk down to the beach with minimal cramping, but her heart was beating hard in her chest. Thankfully, she saw the pack’s figures down the beach further when she got there, and she quickly walked down.

”Jacob?” He turned at the sound of his name. 

”Hey Lee-” The look on her face immediately made his stomach churn. “What’s wrong?”

Leah didn’t care in that moment who was around, but she vaguely noticed Quil, Paul, Sam, Embry, and Colin. “I think something’s wrong.” 

”What’s going on? Why didn’t you call, Leah, you shouldn’t be-”

“I tried to call,” she said hastily. “Your phone’s in my bedroom.”

“I’m sorry-“

”I’m cramping,” her voice broke as she cut him off, tears in her eyes, only now, seeing him face-to-face, realizing how scared she was for anything to happen to their baby. 

Cramping? What? No… Carlisle said she was fine a week ago! Jacob barely knew the anatomy of a female body when it came to the uterus, but he knew that couldn’t be good. The older vamp was supposed to be there tomorrow for another check-up, but Jacob saw the worry in Leah’s eyes and knew they couldn’t wait until tomorrow to get her looked at.

The panic on her face caused him to go into survival mode and he passed his phone – that Leah had given to him upon her arrival, to Sam without really looking. “Call Carlisle. The number’s programmed in. Tell him he has to come now.”

He immediately grabbed Leah’s hand and brought her over to the driftwood so she could sit down. He knelt in on the rocks in front of her, looking up into her eyes as he took both of her hands in his. “When did it start?”

”Since I woke up a little while ago – I thought it might go away, but it hasn’t.” she said, feeling dampness start to fall over her cheeks. 

“Okay, listen, breathe - getting worked up is only going to stress the baby out,” he tried to calm her, but his heart was pounding, too. 

“What if… what if there’s something wrong with the baby? What if I’m infertile after all?” The words only caused more tears to fall down her cheeks and her breathing was labored. 

“Leah, listen to me,” he said levelly, looking in her eyes. “Calm down. Carlisle will be here soon, and he’ll check you out, but you have to try and stay calm.” She nodded and tried to take deep breaths in. “Just breathe, okay?” He felt like he needed someone telling him to breathe because he felt like there was no air, but he had to try to keep her calm – she was the one carrying the baby.

”Carlisle’s on his way, meet him at the Cullen’s,” Sam came over quickly, handing Jacob back his phone. He stuffed it into his pocket and thanked Sam.

”Can you stay with her while I get the rabbit?” Jacob asked quickly. “I don’t want her to walk.”

”Of course.”

“I’ll be right back okay?” He kissed her cheek and Sam sat beside her as Jacob left.

He put a hand on her knee and Leah instinctively leaned into him in a friendly, comforting gesture. “Everything will be fine,” Sam said, wrapping an arm around her shoulders to try to keep her calm. There was nothing romantic about their position, but having him there still soothed her and she tried to talk deep, calming breaths in. The other guys stayed back, knowing it was best not to get involved – Jacob and Sam had it covered and they didn’t know what to say in this situation, but Paul stepped forward to go sit with her, too. He felt like he had to be there for her and Jake.

“He’ll be quick,” Paul promised, knowing the house was only minutes away. 

Leah looked up to him and nodded, not even having the chance to hate being vulnerable in front of everyone – just wanting the baby -their baby, to be okay. 

He brought the car back in under five minutes and Jacob got Leah in the passenger seat before he drove as fast as possible to the Cullen’s. He pulled into the driveway and Carlisle came out immediately to her side of the car. 

“Hello, Leah, how are you feeling?”

“I’ve been cramping since I woke up… I don’t want anything to happen to the baby, Carlisle. It can’t. Please help me.” She didn’t care what species he was in that moment, or what history they had, she just needed his help and she would have done anything to get it.

Carlisle gave her a warm smile, “Of course, come inside and I’ll examine you.”

They went inside. Thankfully, Carlisle had come alone, and Jacob didn’t even feel the disappointment of his wolf with the panic raging inside him. They went back into the room they had been in the last time and Leah got up, onto the table. 

“Are the cramps really painful and are you spotting at all?” Carlisle asked, putting gloves on.

“Not really painful, just persistent, and no,” she said softly. 

“Alright, let’s do an ultrasound first.” Carlisle saw the panic in both of their faces, and he paused. “Listen, cramping during your first trimester is extremely normal. Your uterus is expanding with the baby’s growth and cramping is the result. Bleeding would worry me, but if that’s not a concern, then I’m not worried. Both of you take a deep breath, okay?”

Leah nodded, and Jacob clasped her hand tightly, sitting beside her. Carlisle got the machine and lifted Leah’s shirt carefully before putting the familiar gel on and starting the machine. As soon as Leah heard the heartbeat, she started to cry.

”You’re fine; the baby is fine,” Carlisle promised, though his face told another story.

”What’s wrong?” Jacob asked.

”The baby is registering size-wise close to ten weeks.”

”I thought you said I was six weeks just last week?”

Carlisle nodded, moving the small handle over her stomach to get a better look. “You were - quite clearly so, but… you’re almost ten now. I’ll need to do some more blood work.”

”Is the baby okay?”

”Perfectly healthy, just… bigger,” Carlisle promised. He gave her a new set of images to look at while he wiped the gel off her and got his needle. 

Leah held her arm out to him as he quickly got the blood sample and her and Jacob were looking at the new picture. Leah’s eyes were glossed with tears, and Jacob pushed the lump in his own throat back, relieved her and the baby were okay. He wasn’t sure how long Carlisle was gone, but when he came back, he looked baffled.

”I rechecked your labs from last week and they’re perfectly in sync for six weeks. I want to do an amniocentesis with your permission. It’s where I go in with a needle and penetrate the embryonic sac. I want to ensure the composition of the baby’s cells is normal and developing correctly just to be safe. I couldn’t do the test with Bella because of Renesmee’s skin – but I think a look at the genes where you’re both wolves would be beneficial. The quick growth is similar to Renesmee’s, but much safer and normal than Bella’s, of course. The procedure does carry risks, but I think the benefits will outweigh the risk associated. I just want to ensure the fetus is developing chromosomally as per schedule with the accelerated growth and wolf genes involved.”

Leah sighed, “Do whatever you have to do.”

”I’ll start prepping then get you ready and talk you through it, okay?”

Leah nodded, taking a deep breath. Carlisle got everything ready, informed her of the risks, and then gave her the local anesthetic. Leah took a deep breath in as he prepared her for the pinch, and she cringed as she felt the pressure of the needle. Jacob kept her hand tightly, watching as Carlisle found the fetus on the ultrasound and guided his way in to get the sample.

”You okay?” Jacob asked as she cringed.

”Just a little cramping.”

”That’s normal,” Carlisle advised her again. “Just breathe, I’ll be only another second.”

No longer than a minute later, Carlisle was finished, and he went over to the counter.

Leah was exhausted - mentally and physically. Jacob whispered how good she did in her ear, and she leaned into his body. He kissed her cheek, letting their foreheads press together. Thank God the baby was okay. They felt, in that moment, like a couple that had been together for years than two young lovers who ended up accidentally creating a human.

Carlisle came over a moment later, “Your baby is healthy - but the baby has chromosomal abnormalities. As both of you have an extra chromosome where your shapeshifters, the baby has three. One more than a vampire, one less than you.”

”What does that mean?” Leah asked, brow furrowed.

”I don’t know, but I can tell you that everything else is in normal range for a ten-week-old fetus. I… suspect the extra chromosome has to do with the impressive birth growth rate and could quite possibly be a strengthening chromosome for your pack.”

”What?”

“The baby is strong - not unnaturally strong, but the way it’s growing seems to be double the time of a fetus with two human parentage. I suspect the baby will continue to develop at twice the rate of a normal pregnancy.”

”So she is okay, and the baby should be fine?” Jacob asked. “Despite this abnormality?” He hated the word being used to refer to their baby – abnormal? Absolutely not. Their baby would be perfect.

”I can’t see why it would cause any issues; you both carry the bloodline of a shapeshifter - I think that’s the difference.”

They let the information set in. “So instead of having 40 weeks… I have 20 to prepare for this?” Her head was spinning. “Well, ten more, really…”

”That would be my guess, yes. I will continue to monitor you and we can go from there. I’ll come twice a week from now on.”

”Will you deliver the baby?” Leah asked, surprising them all. She couldn’t have a human mixed up in this, and despite her doing her best not to all this time, she trusted Carlisle. At least with this. 

“If you feel comfortable with that, absolutely.”  
When they got back to the Clearwater’s, Sue, Seth, and Charlie were in the living room and greeted them. “Hey, how are you feeling?”

Leah sat on the love seat by Jacob, Seth in the lounge chair and her mom and Charlie on the couch. “Alright. Had some cramping earlier, but Carlisle said it’s all fine, but, uh, the baby is going to be here a little sooner than we originally thought.”

Charlie being there was the least of her concerns right now. Surely he would be around through-out the pregnancy and realize when she was supposed to be halfway through and had a baby instead that there was something up.

“Oh?”

She gave a quick recap and Sue nodded, “Well… That’s definitely soon.”

“Tell me about it.”

“So when does he think you’ll be due?”

“He said around August or September, but he wants to monitor me every week to see how things are progressing. He’ll have a better idea when I’m further along and he can tell if my progression rate stays the same in the next few weeks.”

They exchanged some more idle chit chat – more about the baby, Sue and Charlie living together, and Abigail and then Sue hesitated, “Charlie and I were wondering if we could cash in the family dinner I mentioned to you a while ago?”

“A family dinner?” Leah tried to think back to when her mom had asked, not having remembered, and then realized it had been the day Renesmee matured – when she had gotten home from Emily’s just after fighting with Jacob and had been only half-listening. She probably would have agreed to murder that night if it allowed her to go to her room and avoid her mom’s questioning about the tears glazing her vision. Shit.

Charlie spoke up, “All of us, Bella, Edward, and Renesmee.”

Leah hesitated, having already realized the implications behind the word ‘family’ in context to Charlie – and why her mother had been seemingly nervous to ask that night and looked uncomfortable now, but Seth spoke. He didn’t have any beef with Charlie’s kids – or grand kid, aside from Jacob hurting his sister because of Renesmee but that wasn’t Renesmee’s fault. Still, his brow furrowed. “Can Abigail come?”

“It may be best if we keep it… well, you know-“

“Away from humans,” Jacob said, understanding where she was going with this. 

Seth sighed, “Well, I’m in.”

Sue looked to her daughter and Leah frowned. “Mom-“

“One night,” she asked. “Please. I know… how uncomfortable it will be for you but can we all try to get along?”

“We’re supposed to be enemies,” Leah stated childishly, crossing her arms over her chest.

“That didn’t stop you from seeking Carlisle’s help earlier.”

“Oh, that’s entirely different, and you know it.”

“One night, please Leah. I promise it won’t become habit. I know you’re… not on friendly terms, but one night, for me?”

She could hardly say no to her mom – the woman who had done absolutely everything for her, but she hated the idea. “Fine.”

“You’re welcome to join us, Jacob. You’re a part of this family, now.”

“Which one?” Leah grumbled, feeling her temper and jealousy growing unfairly. 

“Leah,” Sue chastised.

“It’s fine,” Jacob said, looking to Leah. “I don’t have to come if you don’t want me to.” Honestly, he kind of hoped she didn’t want him to. He hadn’t spoken to Renesmee since the other night at the cabin and he really didn’t want to have any type of conversation with her after finding out about the pregnancy within earshot of Leah, just to be safe. He was trying to cause her as little stress and emotional upset as possible, but his luck was seemingly running out.

She wouldn’t meet his eyes and he shifted nervously beside her. Of course, she wanted him to! He was her boyfriend and the father to her unborn child. Honestly, he had been amazing this past week – but her life was already so confusing, and she didn’t want to face Renesmee again quite yet or have Jacob around her until they had a firmer footing about the pregnancy. “Why now?” She turned back to her mom.

“We just want to get everyone together for one evening,” Charlie said easily. “Last Christmas went smoothly, didn’t it?”

They had spent it at Charlie’s together. Admittedly, it hadn’t been horrible, but then again, back then she wasn’t in love with her Alpha and watching him and Renesmee together didn’t sicken her any more than watching any imprint together. It was under vastly different circumstances. Leah nodded sternly, “Just peachy.” This sort of situation had been on the top of her red alert list when her mom mentioned her serious relationship with Charlie and now it was a situation they all had to mitigate for the people they loved. 

Her hormones were playing a huge roll in her emotional roller coaster – she knew it but couldn’t exactly help it. Maybe she was being unfair – she really should placate her mom a little more and appreciate everything she had done for her and do this for her without complaint, but it wasn’t just the fact that she didn’t like the vampires – she kept desperately clinging to Jacob’s idealism that he and Nessie were done and having her here – seeing them interact together, would make the wicked thoughts of any type of reconciliation between them – pointedly naked, come back to the forefront of her mind. She knew time would heal things and hopefully, he would continue to stand by her and prove her demons wrong, but it had only been a week. Despite the baby moving things along between them in a more romantic way, the irony of his connection with Nessie wasn’t lost on her. He could say no to her, and she to him, but the truth remained: They were still attracted to each other, even if he had decided not to act on it.

She thought back to Emily’s words about being second best, and realized even if he put her first, knowing he still had some type of lingering feelings for Renesmee was difficult – the exact same thing Emily felt with Sam. She had thought Emily had her happily ever after this entire time, but she hadn’t realized how hard that it had been for her knowing that Sam had chosen Leah first and that there would always be a part of him that loved her even in the face of his imprint. Insignificant? Maybe, but still there, nonetheless. 

It wasn’t fair of her to continue to take the past out on Jacob, she knew that, and she knew he was choosing her – which was unheard of in the face of an imprint, but she was still trying to work through their relationship and then a pregnancy shock. It was kind of a lot for one week.

“Leah?” Her mom’s voice pulled her out of her head. “You don’t have to, I know it’s been a lot. I won’t force this on you, especially not now-“

“It’s fine,” she said finally, her inner debate crumbling. “I’ll be there – and on best behavior. When?”

“Tomorrow night? I know it’s not the ideal time, but there really hasn’t been one. They were going to come in with Carlisle, but since he was here today instead I can see if next week’s better…”

“Tomorrow’s fine.” She didn’t need any more time to be inside her head than necessary.

She got up, and Jacob did, too, but she needed time and turned to him, taking his hands. “I’m going to get in the tub, okay?”

He was originally supposed to start bringing his stuff over today, but he had a suspicion that today may not be the best idea with the news, so he nodded. “I’ll head out. See you tomorrow?”

She nodded and he kissed her cheek before she went upstairs and ran a lukewarm bath and grabbed a book, trying to relax.

After tossing and turning all night, unable to sleep thanks to her aching back, recurring nausea, and mental drain, she felt even more tired the next morning. She had to house to herself for most of the morning, but her mom came over mid-afternoon and started preparing dinner. It made Leah a little nauseous, if she was being honest, but she tried to push the thought away and help her mom cut up vegetables. 

“How are you feeling today?”

“A little nauseous – and really tired,” she admitted, cutting up carrots. “Why are we even doing dinner? They don’t even eat,” she grumbled.

“Renesmee does, and we do,” Sue pointed out. Leah fell silent, moving on to cutting an onion. Sue was seasoning a roast and sighed, turning to her daughter. “One night, okay? We don’t have to do this again anytime soon.”

“I already said I would,” she said defensively. “I told you, I’m just not feeling well.” She put the knife down and turned to face her mom.

“I know, this pregnancy is… a lot.”

“I hate taking my anger out on Jacob,” she finally admitted, turning back toward the onion. “I just… it’s been an emotional rollercoaster and the hormones don’t help.”

Sue chuckled, “When I was pregnant on you, I started a yelling match with your father just because he ate the last eclair.”

Leah cracked a smile, “You don’t even like pastries that much.”

“Well, I was on my feet at work all day and all I could think about was coming home and eating it, but when I went to get it, it was gone. So, I get the hormonal and irrational part.”

They both laughed and stayed to lighter topics for the remainder of the afternoon. Her mom always soothed her about her pregnancy worries. They finished preparing dinner, put it in the oven to cook, and Leah went upstairs to pull on a pair of light-washed, high-rise jeans and a simple black blouse with a mid-length sleeve and a deep v that didn’t show anything but definitely accentuated her chest underneath the material. She brushed her hair and it fell to the middle of her chest, now. She was already tired and putting much effort into her appearance felt even more exhausting, but she did manage some mascara before she went downstairs to help her mom set the table.

When she was almost done, the doorbell rang and her mom promptly answered. She smelled them before they came in, and she immediately felt her empty stomach seek revenge. She tried to take deep breaths through her mouth, but the scent, with three of them in the small area, was overwhelming. When she finally placated her stomach enough with deep breathing, she left the dining room and went out into the living room where Edward, Bella, Renesmee, and Charlie were sat around and Sue was offering Charlie and Renesmee something to drink.

“It smells amazing, Sue,” Bella commented nicely. “I’m sure you didn’t let dad get his hands on it?”

She laughed, and Leah hovered in the doorway, not wanting to get too close and risk her breakfast from hours ago making an appearance. “Your father’s cooking skills are actually improving, believe it or not,” Sue returned.

“Does this mean you won’t burn my grilled cheese sandwiches anymore?” Renesmee laughed, having briefly made eye contact with Leah. 

“No promises,” Charlie chuckled before following Renesmee’s gaze. “Hey, Leah. How are you feeling?”

Sue went to get Renesmee and Charlie’s drinks – a glass of water and beer, and Leah gave her most convincing smile. “I’ve been better.”

Edward got up, sensing her unease and opened a window. “That should help,” he said, having read her mind. She was grateful for his intrusion because the breeze soothed her stomach a little. She nodded her thanks to him, and he turned his attention back to his father-in-law. “So, how’re things at the station?”

“Oh, you know, same old stuff, different kids. I swear they get more adventurous every year. We got a call about a week ago about some kids having a party down on Danielson’s Road. When we got there, not only was the music loud enough to deafen you, but they were jumping off the roof into a backyard pool. Drunk.”

Leah smiled at Charlie’s reference. “That doesn’t sound too bad to me,” she mused, walking a little closer to lean against the broken stair railing that Jacob hadn’t fixed, as her mom came back with the drinks. “I mean, better than cliff diving.”

Charlie chuckled, “Well not everyone has… special abilities like everyone here.”

“I’m not special,” Sue pointed out teasingly as she handed him his beer. 

Charlie looked up to her and smiled, “Special to me.”

“Okay guys,” Leah said, trying to act disgusted, but unable to hide her smile as they kissed quickly and his arm snacked around her mom’s waist as she sat on the arm of the couch beside him. “My stomach’s already not the best, how about we keep the sweet talk and PDA to a minimum?”

Sue flushed, and Edward and Bella laughed. Renesmee still seemed to be a little uncomfortable around Leah (the feeling mutual), but she sipped her water and tried to engage in the conversation. 

“Where is Seth?”

“With Jacob. They’re just finishing up patrol,” she checked the clock. “Should be here soon.”

Of course, Jacob’s name brought up a sore spot and the awkwardness grew palpable. “I’ll check on dinner,” Leah excused herself and went into the kitchen. When she checked everything, she sighed and leaned against the cupboards. Hopefully this night wouldn’t be too long and dragged out and she could get in bed early and try to get some sleep. She really wanted to make-up with Jacob from her rudeness yesterday and have him stay over and keep her company. She always slept better in his arms.

She re-emerged when she heard Jacob and Seth come in. Jacob was shrugging off his black leather jacket. Immediately, she was hit with how attractive he was – the primal urge that had forced them together so many times before and that had, admittedly, been kind of absent since news of the pregnancy broke and caused some ripples. Not to mention her not exactly feeling sexy trying not to vomit half of the time. 

He said hello to everyone, and Seth went to wash up before he turned to her and went over, hugging her tightly. She noticed Renesmee didn’t acknowledge Jacob at all and likewise, he tried to avoid speaking directly to her. “Hello beautiful,” he said happily, kissing her cheek as he pulled back. She smiled and hugged him back before rolling her eyes at his chivalrous attempt to pretend this wasn’t awkward. “How are you feeling?”

“Been better. Y’know, before I ended up knocked up, but not terrible.” 

Renesmee was on the love seat by herself, Edward and Bella on the couch next to Charlie, and Seth went to sit beside Renesmee – Sue running back and forth between the living room and the kitchen. There was an armchair left, but Leah hadn’t ventured over to sit with the leeches yet and was enjoying keeping her distance – at least until her back started aching. 

“You should sit down,” Jacob said finally as he saw her stretch her back. She nodded, sitting in the armchair. Jacob stood behind it, leaning on the back. Everyone was quiet, and it was extremely weird. Leah focused her attention out the nearby window, trying not to focus on Renesmee’s tight, black, shiny leggings and long-sleeved, deep green shirt with a ruffle around the bust. Like her outfit, everything was covered, but there was something suggestive about the flowy neckline. Maybe it was the way it just fell off her shoulders, revealing her prominent collar bone, but she tried not to think into it too much. She felt bloated and pale in comparison to Renesmee’s child-like, happy features, but she also wasn’t pregnant and exhausted, so it really wasn’t a fair comparison anymore.

“So,” Seth broke the silence. “Where are you guys staying to now?”

“In Alaska with Tanya’s clan for the summer,” Renesmee replied. “It’s beautiful there, but Aunt Rosalie wants to go back to Paris in the fall.”

“Paris?” Jacob asked, finally acknowledging Renesmee’s presence. “I’m surprised that Blondie wants to go the most romantic city considering she’s the least pleasant person I know.”

Renesmee rolled her eyes playfully, which admittedly, kind of annoyed Leah. She hated that they had any connection at all, let alone the inside jokes that they had. When they guarded the Cullen’s, she kept out of the Rosalie drama Jacob enjoyed taking part in, so she didn’t have much to comment on, but Renesmee did. “Paris is the first place her and Uncle Emmett honeymooned.”

“Rosalie’s always loved Paris,” Edward said distastefully. “She somehow can see past the dirty sidewalks, awe-stuck tourists, and pestering side-walk salesman selling Eiffel tower key chains and actually enjoys it there.”

“Paris seems pretty romantic,” Bella protested. “Imagine looking out over the Eiffel Tower over the lights of Paris at night?”

“With 500 other people,” Edward mused. “If you really want to go, though -“

“No, no,” Bella laughed. “I mean, not right now, anyways, but definitely someday. Maybe if Rosalie gets her way, we’ll be there sooner rather than later.”

“Well, we have forever,” he reminded her, making Leah feel even more nauseous. 

“I’ve got another joke for Rosalie the next time I see her,” Jacob mused, ignoring them. “What does a beer bottle and a blonde have in common?” Everyone turned to look at Jacob, and Leah craned her next to see him behind her. “They’re both empty from the neck up.” 

“You and Aunt Rosalie need to make amends,” Renesmee said, smirking. 

“The only thing we have in common is you,” Jacob reminded her. “And that’s even… well, not that strong anymore now that you’re gone.” There was an uncomfortable silence and Leah saw their eyes lock awkwardly together before they both looked away.

Leah tried to pretend like she felt comfortable in this situation, but she really, really, wanted to bolt. “What should a good joke have in common with a pregnancy?”

Jacob walked around to sit beside her on the arm of the chair and grinned, focusing his attention on her. “What?”

“A good delivery,” she mused. “You may want to fine-tune your jokes before seeing Rosalie again if you want to impress her. Google wants it’s cheesy one-liners back.”

Jacob laughed, glad that she was at least trying to get along with everyone. He knew she was far from at-ease.  
“Dinner’s ready,” Sue called soon after and they all got up and went into the kitchen. Edward and Bella went to the table as the rest of them picked up their dinner and Jacob slid into the spot beside Leah. Her stomach was still finicky, but she knew if she kept it empty, it would be a lot worse later, so she managed to get some vegetables into her before her stomach calmed down and allowed for more of an appetite. 

“Renesmee,” Sue said. “Your grandfather tells me that you’re going to be enrolling in school in Alaska come September?”

Renesmee hesitated but nodded. “Yeah, that’s the plan unless Rosalie manages to convince Esme and Carlisle differently.” 

“Are you excited?”

“I guess so,” she forced out.

Bella frowned, putting a hand on her daughter’s shoulder. “She’s not loving the idea of it.”

“It doesn’t exactly seem thrilling to be doing summer school with you and dad to try to catch me up to speed before September where I’ll have to go and hang out with humans who probably know a lot more than I do,” Renesmee said finally, avoiding Jacob’s gaze – which wasn’t amused.

“It’ll just be an adjustment,” Edward sighed. 

“What’s the point of Phys-ed? Or Art class? What am I going to do by running laps or painting a picture of a dog? I want to stay home with Aunt Rosalie.”

“Ness, we’ve had this discussion. Rosalie is staying home because of the situation.”

“She seemed fine with me,” Renesmee crossed her arms over her chest in a childlike stance.

Edward looked to the others and sighed, “There’s a daycare on campus at the high school that Carlisle’s chosen. There’s a higher than average teenage pregnancy rate. Rosalie’s staying home for her own… well, her own sanity. It was that or for her and Emmett to break off, and she didn’t want to miss out on anything with Renesmee, so Carlisle and Esme agreed to let her pretend she’s graduated. Renesmee’s been trying to get them to do it for her, too.”

It was common knowledge that Rosalie always wanted to be a mom – and that immortality, excluding Bella’s case, didn’t allow for biological children. Since she would never damn a baby to their life, she had no option but to accept her infertility which had been extraordinarily difficult. Leah didn’t hate the blond vampire – she would have done the same in Rosalie’s shoes if Bella had asked, but she didn’t exactly want to be best friends with her, either. Still, she knew how she felt when she had thought she would never be able to have kids, and it bugged her more than she would openly admit. Rosalie suffered through her own inability to reproduce with her husband and Leah suddenly felt extra-thankful for the baby growing in her belly, poor circumstances or not.

“It’s the application of what they’re teaching that is important, Ness. It may not seem practical now, but it’s just giving you a well-rounded education to see what you enjoy and want to pursue.”

“I’m never going to pursue anything, mom. I’ll never be allowed to go to college – and even if I can, I’ll never be able to practice what I do because we’ll move again, and I start right back out in high school pretending that we’re brothers and sisters. I just don’t get why I even have to go.”

“Rosalie likes to tinker with cars, your father plays piano – going to school will help you pursue your own interests. They both have post-secondary education. Plenty of it.”

“They didn’t learn those qualities in a classroom,” Ness argued. “Plus – no offence, but they don’t exactly do anything other than a hobby with that knowledge. I have hobbies. I like to read.”

“Can she just stay home with Rosalie this time around?”

“She needs to learn this stuff, Jacob,” Edward said. “She’s far more advanced in a lot of ways, but she still needs to learn about history and math and how to blend in with humans.”

“I know about the volturi’s history,” Renesmee pipped up. 

Bella smiled, “You need to learn human-stuff, too. It’s important to me. And it’ll be important for you, too, once you learn it and feel like you fit in more.”

She sighed, “I’ll never fit in.”

“You need socialization, too-“

“Because the Cullen’s socialized with anyone but you, Bells? Come on,” Jacob scoffed. 

“Jacob,” Leah said cautioning him as she reached over to take his hand under the table and get his attention.

“When you’re a parent,” Edward said. “You’ll understand.”

“Again with this, you’re too young stuff, huh? Sorry that we’re not all ancient like you.”

Leah sighed and dropped his hand. She understood him picking up for Renesmee, but she still didn’t like it and if she was being honest, Renesmee looked a little annoyed by it, too.

“So, if your child doesn’t want to go to school, you’ll let them stay home?” Edward countered.

“No, but my kid-“ He stopped, looking between Edward and Renesmee. He didn’t have to say it; his kid wouldn’t be abnormal. Genes-aside. Maybe his words would have been a little more sensitive, but that was exactly what he meant.

Renesmee frowned and got up from the table, “Could you please excuse me for a minute, Sue?”

Sue nodded and sighed. Admittedly, the drama of the night she expected to be between her daughter and Renesmee, so at least that seemed to be pretty under control. Maybe it would have gone more smoothly if Jacob hadn’t have come. But, Jacob, Renesmee, and Leah were going to have to learn how to get used to being around each other, after all. Renesmee got up and went out into the living room, and Jacob sighed. He went to get up and go after her, but Leah took his hand. “Give her a minute.”

“I need to check on her,” he removed his hand from hers and went out and Leah sighed, pushing her mashed potato around on her plate. Renesmee was acting really out of character for her, and he wanted to get to the bottom of it.

“Ness?” Jacob approached her as she looked out the front window.

“I get it, okay?” She said, turning to look at him. “You’re going to have a family – a normal family. You don’t need me anymore, so stop pretending like you care about me not wanting to go to school – it’s a little below your maturity level anyways considering you’re going to be a dad soon.”

Jacob was immediately taken back by her hostility, and his brow furrowed. “I do care about you, and I don’t want you to be miserable. I was advocating for you in there, isn’t that what you want? To not go to school?”

“It doesn’t matter,” she crossed her arms over her chest. “It’s clear that what I want is irrelevant.”

“So this is about the baby? About Leah? I thought you supported my decision?”

“I do,” she said firmly. “I just don’t like being here watching it being rubbed in my face.” Jacob looked extremely confused, and she sighed, her harsh façade dissolving slightly. “Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t want to come tonight - mom and dad made me. Not being around you, accompanied by how we left things, and the baby… it’s been hard. I’ve been trying to work through my feelings about the night we spent together before I left and then when I came back and found out about the pregnancy… It’s just been difficult.”

“I should have been there to talk to you more,” he admitted. “Try to… rationalize everything, but the night we found out about the baby… I was going through a lot myself. I just found out I was going to be a dad. It really wasn’t the right time to hash out how you felt about us.” 

She avoided his gaze, “I know. I just feel completely alone.”

“You’re not alone,” Jacob said, reaching out to touch her arm. 

“Then why don’t you have anything to do with me anymore?”

“That’s not true, you moved-“

“There’s a thing called a phone, you know. You have my number, but you never call, and you never answer mine.”

He hesitated and sighed, reaching up to rub the back of his neck. “You didn’t call me back after the other night.”

“Because I’m trying to respect your decision, like you want. You think Leah would appreciate me calling you everyday or over some minor inconvenience in my life after everything she’s been through? I reached out, you said we’d talk later, and I never heard from you. I’m not going to keep calling.”

“I’m sorry, I should have taken your call. What did you need the other night?”

“I just wanted to talk about tonight; us, so I wasn’t coming in entirely blind to the situation.”

“Ness-“

She pulled away from him, tears springing to her eyes. “Jake, please, go back in, this looks bad. I just need a minute.” She turned away, not wanting him to see the dampness in her eyes, but it was too late.

“I don’t care what it looks like,” he said firmly. “I can deal with Leah later. You’re upset and I want to help. What can I do?”

“There’s nothing you can do. This just sucks.”

He felt the pull to comfort her and he sighed. “Talk to me.”

Nessie turned back to him, blinking back tears, and hesitated before reaching up. Jacob instinctually raised a brow, not realizing what she was doing until she gently touched his cheek. Her gift. Suddenly, mages of the past week flashed through his eyes. After she left the Cullen’s the night she found out Leah was pregnant and crying in her mom’s arms, the move and how out of sorts she felt outside of Forks and with the Denali coven without Jacob and how the last time they visited, he had been with them, and finally, how upset she had been when he brushed her call off the other night. A moment later, she dropped her hand and Jacob was silent as his heart ached. 

“I’m glad you’re happy, but you broke my heart and then cut me out of your life entirely. I wish you never imprinted on me.” Suddenly, she reached down to her wrist and with her free hand, unclasped the promise bracelet he had given her the Christmas prior. “You should have this back. I don’t need your protection anymore.” 

She turned on her heel and walked away, back to the table and apologized, and Jacob stood there, speechless, before collecting himself enough to go back inside. Leah hadn’t heard the conversation, but she didn’t need to – Jacob’s face and Renesmee’s damp eyes said enough and when she looked down to his clench fist, she saw the bracelet he had given Renesmee months prior between his fingers. He sat beside her, and she avoided his gaze. She knew the gesture must have hurt his heart, but she didn’t want to think about another woman having that power over him and she watched as he shoved the bracelet into his jeans pocket, tight-lipped, from her peripheral. 

The room was silent, which was agonizing. Renesmee felt obligated to fix it, since she was the reason. Her mom squeezed her hand under the table, and she sighed, wanting nothing but to leave and cry in her mom’s arms but needing to put on a brave face in front of Leah. “Seth, how’s Abigail? My mom told me that you imprinted.”

Seth smiled and nodded, “She’s great. We thought it would be best for her to sit tonight out, but she’s coming over later.”

“That’s great,” she said happily, trying to put her own emotions aside. Her and Seth always had a good relationship. “Tell me about her.”

So he did. Leah watched his face as he spoke about her and couldn’t help but to smile regardless of the dismal mood otherwise.

“She stayed over the other night and we watched movies until like, 2 AM,” Seth finished. “She even like scary movies.”

“She’s staying over?” Sue interrupted.

Seth looked to his mom uncomfortably. “Uh, yeah, I thought it’d be fine.”

“I just didn’t realize,” she said finally. 

“Jake’s here all the time, so-“

“Your sister and Jacob are… well, in a much different situation,” Sue said softly. 

“And I’m not dumb and I’m not going to get in that situation,” Seth said, a little annoyed of his mom’s stricter rules with him. “I was going to ask, actually, if I could throw a party tomorrow night? Thomas was supposed to throw it, but he failed his math test, so his mom said no. I’ll be really careful, I promise-”

Sue hesitated, “I’m not sure it’s the best time, Seth.”

”Leah and I can go to the cabin for the night?” Jacob offered, looking over at her. “We could use the time alone, and then Seth can have the house?”

Sue looked between the kids, “Fine, but Seth, seriously, I don’t like Abigail staying over.”

Leah dropped her fork and sighed, “Can we all just please stop pretending like this is normal? Tonight’s awkward at best. Mom, Seth’s not a kid anymore. I’m home, and I told him if he gets Abigail pregnant, I’ll kick his ass myself. Let’s not go there right now. Why are we all here?”

Sue and Charlie exchanged a quick glance before Charlie took Sue’s hand on the top of the table. Immediately, Leah realized what this was about – a shiny, diamond ring on her left hand. She saw the happy look on her mom’s face, but Leah’s heart sank.

“Congratulations,” Leah said immediately, as soon as everyone else realized. 

Sue flushed, “Charlie and I wanted to tell you that we’re getting married. I know our family is… well, extremely unconventional, but we are a family now.”

“We wanted to get everyone together and try to… well, work through the differences,” Charlie finished naively. 

Leah wasn’t surprised – she knew her mom and Charlie were getting serious, but she still felt her heart break seeing her original wedding band replaced by a new engagement ring. Even after Harry died, she hadn’t taken off their wedding band, but now, it was gone. As childish as she knew it was, Leah couldn’t help but to feel like her dad was being erased. She knew the difference and bit her tongue because of the happiness on her mom’s face – she deserved it, but Leah’s heart felt sad.

“What about dad?” Seth asked suddenly. “You can’t just replace him.”

Sue frowned, not realizing Seth would be the obstacle here. “I’m not replacing your father, Seth. I could never.”

“They deserve to be happy,” Leah said, looking over to her other side, at Seth. “Dad’s gone, Seth. He wouldn’t want mom to be sad forever.”

Seth knew she was right, but it still took him by surprise. 

“Congratulations,” Bella spoke up, followed by Edward.

Seth exchanged a look with his sister and knew she was taking the mature route – she felt the same as he did, he could see it in her face, but she was trying to put their mom first. Seth sighed, “I’m sorry. It’s just... a shock.” Plus, he hadn’t had a warning like she had so this probably did seem like it was coming out of leftfield to Seth. “Congratulations.”

“I think it’s great,” Renesmee said, trying to support them. “You both seem very happy.”

“We don’t need to get married right away,” Sue said uncertainly. “But we wanted to tell you all together.”

Leah didn’t like the idea of her dad being permanently replaced anymore than Seth, and she also hated the idea of the people around the table right now being ‘family’, but Charlie made their mom happy and it wasn’t up to her to mess that up. She had done enough by being the cause of her dad’s death.

Jacob put a hand on Leah’s knee, impressed by her maturity, but she didn’t look at him. Charlie spoke again, trying to smooth things over. “Maybe we can put the bad blood aside and pretend to actually get along?” He knew Sue’s concerns over Seth and Leah accepting this because of Harry and likewise, Leah accepting this because of who his family was, but he was hoping to try to smooth things over.

“I’m happy for you both,” Leah said finally. “But, it’s kind of in our D.N.A to not get along.”

“It doesn’t have to be,” Bella provided.

“It does, actually. ‘Family’ or not, I’m not going to let any of your kind hurt anyone.”

“And we won’t,” Edward chimed in. “We don’t want that anymore than you do.”

“I’ve gotten to know the Clearwater’s fairly well,” Charlie said. “And I know I’ll never replace your dad, but I do love you both. I also see how big Bells heart is, and how Edward is dedicated to her and he’s a son to me. You’re all such good kids – can we focus on that? Focus on the good? The reasons why we should put this feud to bed?”

“It’s more complicated than that,” Bella sighed. “I mean, I’m willing to work with this situation, absolutely, but-“

“Don’t blame this on us,” Leah cut her off. “This isn’t the pack being unreasonable.”

“No, it’s you that’s being unreasonable,” Bella said firmly. “They love each other. Who are we to stand in the way of that?”

Leah shook her head, the audacity! “I’m not ‘getting in the way’ of anything. I am happy for them. While you’ve been running off with your little family and creating a new life, I’ve been the one here, watching how close they’ve gotten, not you. I’m glad they have each other, but that doesn’t mean I want to sit down here with everyone for monthly family dinners. We’re not meant to get along.”

“Genetics seem a little… convoluted here,” Edward said finally. “We aren’t what makes us up – we are who we choose to be.”

“Profound,” Leah said sharply. “But that greater good crap isn’t going to work on me.”

“I know you blame my family and I’s return to Forks for your misfortune-“

“Misfortune?” Leah laughed, “I guess that’s one way to put my boyfriend leaving me, imprinting on my cousin, and then my dad dying. Are you that desensitized?”

Jacob sighed, “Leah, Edward’s right-“

“I wish you’d stop taking their side,” she said, turning to face him. “I’ll tell you what’s unfortunate – this entire situation.”

“No,” Jacob countered. “It’s two people who love all of you, and each other, and wanting to share it with you. Let them. You were there, in my pack, protecting the Cullen’s. They’re not bad – what happened when they moved to town was out of their hands. Do you think they wanted those things to happen to you? Planned them?”

Maybe Jacob was being a voice of reason, but she still couldn’t shake the feeling that he was taking their side: her side. She turned away from him and looked to her mom and Charlie. “I love you both,” she said, her anger kicking down a notch. “I’m so appreciative that you didn’t come in trying to replace our dad, Charlie. You’ve been very kind and sensitive about this situation and I’m really glad that you make my mom so happy. I don’t have a problem with you getting married. It sucks not seeing her wedding ring on, I admit it, but I know she can’t mourn forever, and I don’t want her to. But, unfortunately, the damage between all of us is done and I don’t think there’s any fixing it to be one, big, happy family.”

Sue sighed. She was grateful for Leah’s kind words but knew Charlie’s idea to get them all together to see about some kind of truce was a lost cause from the start.

“Well, we’re willing to make this work,” Bella said firmly. 

Leah knew she would be painted as unreasonable here, but she couldn’t help it. She felt so much and had a hard time biting her tongue. “This is normal to you?”

“No, but that doesn’t mean that we just… give up.”

“This is ridiculous,” Renesmee said finally. “We can put up with one dinner together for the sake of Sue and Charlie, can’t we? They’re not asking us to be best friends.”

“If you think that it’s okay to sit down at a table, across from your imprint and know that he’ll be your uncle in law by marriage and still want to get him into bed? Or was that just a one-time thing?” He words were unfair, but she was hardly being unreasonable here, right? 

Jacob should have known better – this wasn’t a vampire versus wolf dilemma for Leah. It was a Renesmee one – one he could hardly fault her for considering their history, the pain in his chest he felt when he thought of her promise bracelet in his pocket, and his frustration over trying to mediate two important relationships.

“Baby or not, he’d only be my uncle if you get married,” Renesmee pointed out, feeling her own anger rising. “I don’t see a ring on your finger.” She was hurting and was tired of tiptoeing around Leah. 

The shock on Leah’s face was only distracted by Edward’s own concern. Jacob immediately gave Renesmee a disapproving look and went to grab Leah’s hand, but she pulled it away again. Edward turned his attention to Renesmee, clearly confused. “What is she talking about?

“We can discuss this later,” Bella said, tight-lipped.

“Discuss what?” He asked, his words icy. He immediately looked to Jacob’s thoughts, which were impossible to not be on the night in question now that it was brought up and he was so desperately not trying to think about it. Edward saw it loud and clear, and it took everything in his power to stay in his seat. “You did what?”

“Nothing, we did nothing,” Jacob said, sighing and pinching the bridge of his nose. 

“Nothing? It was really nothing to you?” Renesmee cried. “You really don’t care about me at all, do you?”

“Ness-“

“No, forget it,” she said, turning to Leah. “You need to see past your feud with me. Because, from where I stand, you've already won. Does this entire imprint thing kind of suck? Absolutely. But honestly... You've got him. He loves you. He chose you. You're having a baby with him! What more do you want? I didn't only lose him as a potential boyfriend, but I lost my best friend. Do you understand that, or do you just think about yourself? I grew up being told that he was my Jacob – he was there ever since I was born. He was one of the only constant things. My best friend. And I don't have him in my life at all anymore because he's too concerned to even call me because he's afraid that you'll be upset. I lost my best friend when he chose you – the only one I had. Does the imprint suck for you? Yeah, but it sucks for me, too. I don't know how else to explain to you that I'm not interested in continuing things with Jacob-”

“Because you are,” Leah cut her off. 

“What?”

“Interested in continuing things.”

Renesmee's resolved faltered. “But it doesn't matter.”

“It matters to me,” Leah said finally. 

Things grew silent and Jacob didn't know what to do or say, but Renesmee finally sighed, focused on the one aspect in all of this that solidified their future together and took him away from her for good - “You're having his baby.”

“That doesn't mean there's no feelings remaining between you two, though. It's not like we planned this.”

“Can we do this later?” Jacob finally cut in. “The three of us can-”

“If Charlie wants to get us all on the same page and civil, then maybe we should hash it out,” Renesmee's words surprised him – he expected that from Leah, but not her. He realized from her words moments ago and her fiery attitude how much stress she had really been under since moving and he hated that he hadn't been there for her as a friend.

“There's nothing to hash out. We can do it all day, but it doesn't change anything.”

“But why can't it?”

“Because you're in love with my boyfriend!” Leah cried, as though it wasn't obvious.

“And he loves you!”

“Do you not see how me wanting you both in as little contact as possible makes sense?”

“I get it, I just miss him and want to be able to be friends.”

“Friends don't try to sleep with each other,” Leah said icily. 

“You did,” she pointed out. “That's how this whole thing between you started, wasn't it?”

“That was different.”

“No, it wasn't. I had no idea at the time how serious things were between you,” she said defensively. “And as soon as he told me, I backed off. I understand why you're scared, but-”

“Scared? I'm terrified. As you keep pointing out, I'm having his baby, and I feel like I can't even trust you in the same room together.”

“Okay,” Jacob said, shaking his head. He turned to Leah and forcibly took her hands in his. “I don't know what else to say or do to prove to you that I'm committed to you, but I want this baby – I want a life with you. End of story. But,” he turned to meet Renesmee's eyes. “I have to be here for her, too. As a friend. You have to trust me. We can't keep rehashing the past,” he said finally. “It is what it is, but do you really think Seth – or Edward, would let me live if I screw this up?” He was trying to lighten the mood, but it felt like they were inside of a grenade. “I love you – but Renesmee is right. I owe her to be there for her as a friend and in trying to be a good boyfriend to you, I’ve been a terrible friend to her. I’m walking a thin line here, I understand that, but at some point, the three of us need to figure this out – preferably before the baby comes. I’ve been putting it off to give us time to digest the news about the pregnancy, but we need to deal with it head-on, sooner rather than later.”

Leah sighed and felt the overwhelming pregnancy hormones suffocating her. She felt sad that she was in this position, disappointed in herself that she continually blamed Renesmee for something that really wasn't her fault, and annoyed that Jacob had ever been uncertain. But they were all her demons – not theirs. She felt tears threaten her eyes, confliction stirring in her chest. “Excuse me,” she said before pulling her hands back from Jacob’s before getting up from the table and going out the back door, onto the balcony. She didn’t want Renesmee to see her cry, but as a couple stray tears ran down her cheeks, she knew she couldn’t fight it. Stupid hormones!

“Leah?” Her mom stepped out onto the patio moments later, seeing her daughter’s face. She pulled her into her arms tightly as Leah buried her face into her chest.

“I’m sorry,” she said, her words muffled by her mom’s shirt. 

“It’s fine, you’re going through a lot,” Sue said motherly, pulling back to look into Leah’s eyes, which were still clouded with tears. 

“I’m really happy for you and Charlie,” she said finally, wiping her cheeks dry. “Honestly. It’s not even the vamp thing, it’s the Renesmee thing. Always the Renesmee thing. It’s our problem to work through, though, not yours.”

“We’ll figure it out. Charlie’s right – Christmas last year went smoothly with us all, but things have changed since then.”

“How do I accept Renesmee into our lives knowing what I do?”

“With open communication,” Sue said. “You just... need to be honest and communicate. Fighting isn't going to help this situation. You and Renesmee are both going to be in Jacob's life – Always. You both need to figure out how to make it work and what that looks like. You're having a baby, Leah – that's a lifetime commitment. An imprint is, too. You need to decide what your future looks like – for all three of you. Jacob seems very committed to his future with you, but you knew continuing a relationship with him would always be a struggle over the line between him spending time with Renesmee and your jealousy. It sucks, but you need to try to stop pushing her away – not for Charlie and I, but that would be helpful, too, but for your future and your baby’s.”

She sighed and nodded. “I know you’re right, it’s just hard.”

“It’ll get easier with time, I promise. You’re allowed to be upset and angry sometimes, but you need to learn how to manage those emotions.”

“Kind of hard when I can’t even control my tear ducts,” she muttered.

Sue laughed, “You won’t be pregnant forever.”

“Thank God,” she smirked, hugging her mom. “Thanks, mom.”

“What are mom’s for?”

They stayed out back for a few moments, looking up at the stars that filled the sky until Leah seemed more put together before Sue motioned for them to back inside.

She nodded and went back in with her mom, sitting at the table. Everyone was talking again, and she turned to Jacob, reaching out to hug him, catching him by surprise. He immediately pulled her into his chest, though, wrapping his arms around her as best as   
he could while sat beside her. 

“Are you okay?” He whispered.

“I will be,” she promised, pulling back to meet his eyes as a rogue tear slipped down her cheek. He cupped her cheek with his hand, brushing the dampness off with his thumb. 

“I love you,” he said softly, hating that she was so upset, but needing to figure this all out once and for all. He kept his voice low but wanted her to know just how much she meant to him. “You know, I never told you, but when you first told me how you felt, in the clearing… I had to bite my tongue not to say it back. I wanted to. I barely understood the feelings and denied them for so long but hearing you say it made something inside me ignite. I wanted to wait for the perfect time to say it back, when I could be certain things would be okay between us, and I know I screwed that up, but I love you, Leah Clearwater. You and only you.”  
“I love you, too, and I kind of put two and two together without you having of said it in the clearing,” she said softly, smiling at his words, before turning back to Renesmee who was trying not to look at their spectacle of affection. 

“Renesmee?” Leah asked, getting everyone’s attention. “I'm sorry I've been so difficult. I know we... well, are both going to be around, and we do need to figure out what that means and how to get along. My pride has gotten in the way thus far, so I apologize. I didn't mean to make things difficult for you, please believe that. I don't want you to feel like you can't be friends with him. These are my emotions to... well, work through, not yours, so you're right – we need to put this feud to bed. If not for us, then definitely for my mom and Charlie, and,” she turned to Jacob, placing a hand on her very tiny bump. “Our family.”

Renesmee smiled, “Thank you. I'm sorry that this isn't easy for you, either. I didn't mean to make you upset...”

“It's the pregnancy hormones,” Leah sighed, reaching up to wipe the remaining tears away. Maybe that was true, or maybe she was just growing more comfortable with her emotions, but she’d never know the true culprit. 

“Leah? I want us to be friends. Really. I know my feelings for Jacob have gotten in the way of that so far, but I want you to know that they’re my feelings to deal with – not yours,” she said, echoing Leah’s similar ones. “I won’t interfere between you too, but I really want to at least be able to talk to him.”

“You can,” she promised. “I won’t stand in the way of you being friends, but I… I just need to know if anything changes.”

“It won’t,” Jacob promised her as she turned to face him. “You have my word.”

“And mine,” Renesmee added.

She nodded and sighed, “I'm sorry for being so miserable lately. I'd like to blame the hormones for that, too, but I think I've just been a bitch.”

He chuckled but kissed her softly. “You don't need to apologize to me. Thank you for trying to figure this out with me. With us,” he said, looking to Renesmee. He reached into his pocket and laid her bracelet on the table. “It’s yours. I made it for you. I know you don’t need my protection, but I hope you forgive me enough to want it.”

Renesmee smiled wearily and nodded, taking the bracelet, and clasping it around her wrist. “I’m sorry I gave it back.”

“I'm going to get dessert,” Sue said finally, getting up and walking behind Leah, squeezing her daughter's shoulder before disappearing into the kitchen. 

Jealousy was an ugly thing and it made people do even uglier things. 

“How long are you guys staying?” Jacob asked, trying to get the conversation back to a lighter note before Leah or Renesmee ended up in tears again. He had Leah’s hand under the table tightly in his.

Edward still didn't look too impressed by him considering the mental image of him in bed with his daughter, but he was desperately trying to remain civil. First, he wanted Bella, then Renesmee. Why couldn’t Jacob leave what was his alone? At least now with the baby, maybe things could be a little easier with his family. “Just until dinner's over.”


	19. Party

“We don’t have to go,” Jacob offered the next morning as he leaned in the door frame of the bathroom. Before the Cullen’s left the Clearwater’s last night, they promised to stay in Forks for the evening and let Renesmee meet with Leah and Jacob the following morning for breakfast to try and end things on a better note before they went back home. 

“We said we would,” she said, head resting against the side of the tub. 

“Yeah well I’m sure Renesmee will understand that you’re not feeling well.”

“Or think it’s an excuse,” she said as her stomach flopped. She ended up hovering over the toilet again, for the fourth time that morning and Jacob frowned, going over to sit on the tub’s ledge and pull her hair back.

“You’re not going like this, I don’t care.”

“It’ll pass.”

“You said that twenty minutes ago.”

“Well it has to pass at some point, right? If not, I’ll end up in the hospital for dehydration and at least that’s believable with the admittance record.” She had caused enough problems the night before – not that they weren’t warranted concerns, but still, she knew she had to make amends with Renesmee if she was going to have Jacob’s baby and be with him. Extend an olive branch for peace.

Jacob sighed, and she fell back again, leaning against the wall behind her this time. He was grateful that since Emily’s morning sickness was long gone, Sam was filling in for him in the mornings since Seth was at school so that he could be with Leah even though she protested him being here for this every time.

The room was spinning a little, and she was exhausted already, even though she only woke up an hour ago. No matter how much energy she woke up with, it didn’t seem to last long – especially if she was sick. It wasn’t every morning anymore, but she usually felt nauseous and on unlucky days, spent a lot of time on the bathroom floor before noon. She put her hand on her stomach and sighed, “Come on, little one, please stop.”

Jacob chuckled, unable to hide his amusement and adoration when she talked to her belly – especially considering it was still only visible if she was naked. It was silly, but it proved to him what a good mom she already was and would continue to be. Her maternal side was extremely sexy – even now despite their less than active sex since they found out she was pregnant. “If it’s stubborn like you, I don’t think that’s going to work.”

“Like me? Like you, you mean. God, this baby is going to give us both a run for our money.” 

She got up off the floor and grabbed her toothbrush before brushing her teeth. Her shower was going to have to wait until after breakfast because they were short on time thanks to her morning sickness. She finished brushing her teeth, ran a brush through her hair, washed her face, and Jacob followed her back into her bedroom as she slipped out of her pajamas. She felt two, warm hands on her naked skin though as she stood in front of her closet, wondering what to wear. She smiled and turned to face Jacob as his lips found her neck. “If you start this now, we’re definitely going to be late,” she mused.  
Jacob chuckled, “May be worth it.” His fingers grazed gently over the exposed skin, where her tiny bump protruded. He felt the effects of their lack of physical time together, but he also wasn’t really sure what sex with her would be like now while she was pregnant. It was stupid, but he never thought to ask if things were… well, changed at all.

Leah laughed, rolling her eyes as she stepped away from him and into a pair of jeans that were, admittedly, growing tight. She threw on a nice sweater and turned back to him. “Ready to go?”

He nodded and went downstairs with her, slipping into the rabbit. He stopped asking if she was feeling okay long ago because every time she threatened to hit him and promised if she wasn’t okay, she would let him know so he settled on knowing that she was generally okay unless told otherwise. 

They picked Renesmee up from Charlie’s and then went to a café in Forks in silence. Leah was focused on trying to choke back the remaining nausea by snacking on saltine crackers and Renesmee was unsure of her place in this dynamic, so despite Jacob’s small talk to try and get a conversation going, both females were pretty quiet. When they got to the café, they all got out and went inside. 

Jacob kept an attentive eye to Leah as they sat down to make sure she was feeling okay and let her sit on the outside of the booth beside him – Nessie on the other side of the booth, in case she had another episode.

“’Wanna go to the beach after this? It’s a nice day.” Well, it wasn’t raining and was mild.

Renesmee smiled, “That sounds nice.”

“Yeah, sure,” Leah added as the waiter came by to take their order.

“So,” Leah said once the waiter left. “I want you to be able to openly talk. Text, call, whatever. I just ask, as before, if anything with the imprint changes-“

“I’d never take Jacob away from you – from his family,” Renesmee said honestly. “It’ll take some getting used to, but I respect your boundaries and your relationship.”

“Well, guess that’s settled,” Leah said.

“Settled?” Jacob asked.

She shrugged, “This is weird enough, right? I know we have to let the bad blood go. I didn’t do it with Emily for a long time, and I missed so much in her life. I think we need to just… accept what’s happened and move forward. You guys are friends, I accept that, and I want you to continue that, and Renesmee accepts our relationship and the baby, so I’d be happy for her to be in our lives, too. I think we just need to… break the awkwardness away starting now. Figure out our new normal.”

Renesmee smiled at Leah, “I’d like that.”

Jacob sighed, clearly relieved at Leah’s new, matured, and understanding attitude toward the situation. “Me too.”

The waitress came back with food and Leah was grateful that the saltine crackers had absorbed most of her nausea and allowed her to eat a solid breakfast. Conversation didn’t flow naturally, but it flowed and that was the main thing.

“So… how’s the pregnancy?” Renesmee had kept to lighter topics, but if she was going to find out how she fit into Jacob’s life now, she had to know about it. 

Leah hesitated before Jacob gave her a reassuring smile. “It’s been good,” she said uneasily. “The morning sickness sucks, but we’re figuring it all out.”

“Do you think it’s kind of… strange, dating?”

“What do you mean?”

Renesmee shrugged, “My mom said before that it may be weird transitioning to a romantic relationship with Jacob – before all of this happened, of course. I was confused, but she said since we knew each other so long and he was like a brother to me, I don’t know… she thought it may be strange. Since you’ve both known each other for so long, I figured maybe it was a little weird for you, too.”

It was a weird conversation, that was sure, and Leah shrugged, “We did grow up together, but we were never really that close. I was a lot closer with Rachel and Rebecca and he was closer with Seth. When I started high school and got with Sam, we didn’t see each other much. I think Seth think’s it’s weirder than I do, just because they were like brothers. Our families were always close but… I don’t know,” she looked to Jacob. “I never really considered him a brother like Seth did, I guess. It was weird at first just because of everything that happened with the packs and stuff, and I guess I always had written him off as my friend’s younger brother in the past, but it didn’t last long.”

Jacob nodded, “Leah was never like a sister to me, either,” he admitted. “Seth kind of was a little brother always but Leah was… well, my sister’s friend kind of. We only really got close when she joined my pack.” His sister’s really hot, unobtainable friend.

Renesmee nodded understandingly and picked at her eggs. She knew how their relationship had started thanks to Jacob. “Are you both happy?”

She asked Jacob the question before, but not Leah. Jacob hesitated, knowing the question was to gauge out their relationship and familiarize herself and it was Leah who she wanted the reaction from. He knew they were testing the waters, but it still caused a little anxiety for them all to discuss their… weird situation. “I am,” Leah said finally. “It was never what I expected, but Jake makes me really happy.” Jacob took her hand and squeezed it, but Leah sighed, “Are you happy?”

She hesitated, but nodded, “I’m happy that Jacob’s happy. If that’s you, and you’re happy, too, then so am I. It’s going to take some getting used to, but everything’s been so crazy since I finally matured that there isn’t much in my life that seems normal right now. Mom says that will change as time goes on, but I’m glad that we’re all on speaking terms.”  
Leah gave her a small smile, “Me, too.”

“Me three,” Jacob said goofily as they all finished. “Beach time.”

It was mild, but the wind was pretty strong. As they got down to the beach not long after, a more normalized sentiment of friendship circulating around the three, the waves were crashing to the shore, taking up half the beach’s shoreline. 

“When are you leaving?”

“Mom and dad are going to meet me down here soon and we’re going to leave then. I can come back next week – if that isn’t too soon, when Grandpa comes back for the appointment?”

Jacob looked to Leah for an okay, but she ignored his anticipant gaze. She wanted him to be able to navigate this without her permission. He rubbed the back of his neck and nodded, “I think that would be great. Maybe you can come in and see the ultrasound?”

That was for Leah and the older girl nodded, trying her best at figuring this out. The images of Jacob and Renesmee in bed together hadn’t gone away, much like the ones of Sam and Emily from months ago, but she knew she had to get over them or else she would only be hurting herself here. “Yeah, I think that’s a good idea. Seth’s coming, too. It’ll be his first time hearing the heartbeat. My mom did already, and she’s working.”

“Rachel will probably want to come too,” Jacob said, knowing Billy would, if not for the Cullen’s involvement. They still unnerved him. Of course, after the baby was born he was going to have to get over it and come visit the baby if Leah had to stick around the mansion for a bit, but until then, his dad was adamant about him being uninvolved with the Cullen’s – ultrasounds included, at least unless they needed him there or something happened. Jacob understood but it kind of bugged him that his dad wouldn’t get over his feud with the Cullen’s for this. Not that he could blame them - if not for Bella, he, too, probably would still harbor ill feelings. 

“Carlisle better get a bigger study,” Leah teased.

It wasn’t long after that Edward and Bella had met them on the beach. The pack knew about their visit, so they weren’t met at the boarder with resistance. “Time to go home,” Bella said, putting a hand on her daughter’s shoulder. 

Renesmee nodded sadly, “Alright.”

Jacob reached out and hugged Renesmee – something Leah knew was innocent and she had to accept. Renesmee hugged him back before parting and gave Leah a small smile. “I’ll see you next week?”

Leah nodded, “Sounds good. See you then. If you need anything in the meantime, just give us a call.” Us meant Jake, and the connotation was known.

“I’ll let you guys… settle in for the week,” she promised. “You probably have a lot to talk about.”

Jacob thanked her. There were a million questions in Bella’s eyes, but she would ask Nessie later when they left. “Jake? Can I talk to you for a second?”

His brow furrowed but he nodded, following Bella a little farther down the beach. “Bells, if this is about what happened-“

“It’s not,” Bella cut in. “But, I’d like to thank you for walking away that night. I’m not sure how this would have played out if you didn’t, but I can see that Leah makes you very happy.”

“She does,” he promised. “So… what’s up?”

Bella took out a small piece of folded paper from her pocket and handed it to him. Jacob unraveled it curiously and looked down before his eyes bulged. “Bella-“

“No,” she waved him off. “It’s a gift. From all of us. It was Esme’s idea, actually. For you helping us-“

“Carlisle’s helping us now. He’s returning the favor.”

“A little medical advice? Jacob you put your lives – and the pack’s lives, at risk for us. There’s no way to pay that back. But I hope you accept this as a gesture of good faith moving forward and a thank you. You’re going to need it with the baby on the way.”

“I can provide for us,” he said firmly. His tone wasn’t rude, just… well, surprised.

“I know you can, but until then, use this. Figure out the nursery and whatever else you may need in the meantime. I wanted to give it to you in private because I’m not sure how Leah will receive it. I don’t want her to think it’s charity – it’s truly a gift and something we all agreed on – even Rosalie, but I think that was just because despite your rather… interesting relationship, she loves babies so much that she was glad to help and is probably hoping to meet the little one someday, mut or not,” Bella teased.

“I don’t know what to say,” he looked back up to Bella, clearly taken aback.

“Thank you?”

He reached out and hugged her, “Thank you. All of you.”

“It’s no problem, really. I hope it helps with the expenses of a baby. I can’t really believe you’re having one.”

Jacob chuckled, “Me either. If not for Leah being so sick, I’d never think it was real. That and the little belly she’s got going – and the ultrasound, though it looks more like a blob right now than a baby.”

Bella smiled as she watched his face transform talking about the baby, “I’m so happy for you. It’ll be real sooner than you think. Once they put that baby in your arms…” Her eyes were far away, and Jacob was glad he didn’t begrudge the way things turned out with Bella anymore. “It’ll change your life.”

That was a minor statement if he ever heard one. They hugged again and then went back to the beach. Edward was asking Leah about the pregnancy – awkwardly, but they were trying. When Bella came back, they said their goodbyes and left. Leah’s nose turned up as he came back to stand beside her. “You stink. What was that about?”

Jacob hesitated, but didn’t want any secrets between them. He pulled the cheque out of his pocket and handed it to Leah. She looked down and scrutinized it, before looking back up at him, brow furrowed. “What’s this for?”

“Us. The baby.”

“But why? Jake that’s… a lot of money. We can’t accept that.”

“It’s a small dip in their eternal vamp funds,” Jacob said teasingly, hoping she would react pleasantly and not take it as a charity handout as Bella said. “It’s for helping them during the battle – and before. They want us to be financially secure with the baby coming. She said it’s the least they can do.”

He awaited her reaction and she looked down again before handing the piece of paper with a high dollar value back to him. “They didn’t have to do that.”

“But they did,” he pointed out. “It will take care of the nursery – if you want to get new stuff, I can fix up the rest of what the rabbit needs before the baby comes, and well, probably the kid’s college fund, too. Among any… unseen expenses.”

“It’s too much,” Leah protested. “Seriously, with our inheritances, we should be fine…”

“We can’t live at your moms forever.”

She sighed, “I know. Well… I kind of had an idea about that.”

She posed her idea to him and he nodded, “We’ll talk to Seth about it.”

“You don’t have to work with Embry’s mom at the souvenir shop now.”

“What, why?” Tiffany approached her last week after hearing about the pregnancy to see if she wanted to make some money before the baby came by helping her at the souvenir shop on the beach. It was almost tourist season and she was going to need a hand and promised to heed any heavy lifting.

“The cheque – it’s more than enough that you don’t need to work. Especially where you’ve been so sick.”

“The shop doesn’t open until ten. I can get up early and make sure I feel okay. Plus, Tiffany said there would be some leniency when I told her I wasn’t feeling 100%. She’s doing me a favor offering me a job there.”

“But you don’t need to,” Jacob said again, clearly confused.

Leah sighed, “I need to do something, Jake. I can’t just stay home and… wait for this baby. I need to feel productive – and despite the nice gesture from the Cullen’s, which I will thank them for, I still want to contribute financially to our family myself. You should really try to finish high school, too. I know it’s hard with the pack and it doesn’t need to be right now but-“

“I will,” he promised. “Don’t worry about that. I’ve already got some jobs lined up with some local’s vehicles, too, but with this,” he put the cheque back in his pocket after waving it. “At least it’s one less thing I need to worry about right now.”

“This is overwhelming.”

Jacob smiled, “Let’s get some stuff together and get going to the cabin for the night and let Seth have his anticipated party. We can talk to him later and have more heavy decision-making conversations after we relax tonight, okay?” 

Leah grinned and agreed for a carefree night and he was glad she took that better than he originally anticipated. He kissed her softly before they went back to get their overnight bags together to make themselves scarce tonight.  
Leah packed her bag and told Seth for the hundredth time not to destroy the house or get too drunk – because let’s face it, high school parties had alcohol regardless if they were supposed to or not. Jacob left her to have a quick pack meeting before he left and went over the plan for the next few months with the guys on patrol with the new development Carlisle mentioned to him recently with Jane, Demetri, and Alec, and then the guys all fanned out for patrol, school, and sleep for the ones who just came off night patrol. He was finding it hard to keep everything under control lately with the pregnancy, being Alpha, and trying to mitigate the pregnancy, but he was managing – barely. 

He knew school had to get thrown in there, too, for the sake of the diploma if nothing else, but it was hard to focus. He had gone by the week after they found out about the baby in hopes of trying to catch up, but it looked like the only way that was happening was summer school. He had taken some pamphlets and toyed with the idea since the younger pack members would be out of school for the summer and could potentially take some more responsibility off his plate, but it was yet another thing he wasn’t totally sold on. Leah would need him the summer – the baby could be due anytime, really, with its accelerated growth rate. Not having any answers didn’t let him sleep very well, but they would figure it out as time went on.

Plus, another thought had come to mind - something he was hoping Emily may be able to answer for him now that he was there, before faced with it himself tonight. Carlisle and Sue’s medical expertise aside, this wasn’t really something he wanted to discuss with them out of his hurting pride at the topic of concern and his lack of knowledge about it.

Jacob hesitated by the door as the others left and a moment later, he closed the door and stepped back inside, turning toward Emily “Em?” She was cleaning the table off and looked up. “Can I ask you for some advice?”

Emily nodded eagerly, moving all the baked goods onto the counter and wrapping them up before sitting at the table, gesturing for Jacob to sit down. “Of course, what’s on your mind?” She could tell he was nervous and wanted him to relax.

He sat across from her and sighed, “It’s a little personal.”

“The pack’s lack of privacy isn’t something I’m new to,” she promised. “I’m sure a lot of personal things that I would rather stay private is pack-knowledge. I’m surprised Sam kept the pregnancy under wraps so long.”

Jacob avoided her eyes and tried to figure out the best way to phrase his inquiry. “Leah and I… well, we haven’t been intimate since we found out about the pregnancy.” He looked up briefly to meet Emily’s eyes, and she nodded, giving him a warm smile, edging him to continue. “She’s been really sick and tired, so it’s definitely been taking a toll on us, which I completely get, but tonight we’re going to the cabin so Seth can have the house. We’ll obviously be alone, and I’m not sure… well, uh, what to do.”

Emily’s brow furrowed but tried to see where he was coming from. “Because of the pregnancy?”

“Yes… well, no, not like that, but… I don’t even know if it’s, uh, safe?”

Emily tried to hide her amused smile. His care for Leah and the baby was heart-warming, but she knew this wasn’t an easy thing for him to bring up, so she hid her amusement and reached across the table, taking his hand. He met her gaze and she hoped her smile was more encouraging and caring rather than taunting. “Well, first off, pregnancy is an insurmountable change for even the strongest of couples. Sam and I went through the first trimester together and it wasn’t all fun and games. It was hard. I was exhausted and sick like Leah – well, maybe not quite as bad, but I was miserable. I felt bloated all the time, nauseous, and unattractive. Of course, Sam did his best to ensure that I knew this wouldn’t last forever and make me feel attractive, but it did affect our intimate connection. Our wedding night? We ate pizza and fell asleep. I was so tired,” she laughed.   
“Until I hit the second trimester when I started to like my belly changing, the nausea faded, and the exhaustion got a lot better, then the spark came back, too. Not to say it left, but it’s really hard to make a human and expect nothing to change. Sam and I were very affectionate up until the point when I started getting sick. Things change, but they won’t stay that way.” She still held Jacob’s full attention and squeezed his hand before sitting back in her chair and returning her hands to rest on her tummy. “Secondly, there’s nothing unsafe about physical intimacy during pregnancy. My doctor told me when I get closer to my due date, the best way to get the baby out is the same thing that got the baby in there,” she laughed nervously. 

“I mean, that’s kind of what I’m afraid of, too. Carlisle considers her pregnancy more risky than a normal one…”

Emily couldn’t help but to grin, “Sex can’t stimulate a miscarriage.”

Jacob shifted uncomfortably, “So there’s no risks?”

“None,” she promised. “It’s perfectly safe and natural. If you’re both feeling up to it, then there’s no reason to be weary. I promise. Carry on as you did before.”

“I know nothing about any of this,” he groaned. “Absolutely nothing. I saw Bella pregnant, but… it wasn’t mine, y’know? Bella wasn’t mine; the baby wasn’t. Plus, it was under extremely different circumstances considering the immortal stuff. Then you and Sam told me, and I still felt… I don’t know, disconnected? I didn’t have to worry about reading up on anything because as close as we all are, it still didn’t really affect me. But now? I feel like there’s so much to learn – stuff I should honestly probably already know but I’ve never needed to before now. The whole thing is exciting and scary all at once. I try to keep a brave face on for Leah because I know she’s been struggling with this entire thing, as happy as she is, but-”

“You have a right to be scared, too,” Emily promised, cutting him off, seeing the concern and unease written all over his face. “It may be her body right now, yeah, but the baby is still a life-changing force on both of you. Is she scared? Yeah. So am I. Hell, so’s Sam. He doesn’t express that because it can seem silly since we were trying to get pregnant and he really can’t do anything right now except support me, but I promise you he’s nervous. No one who brings a life into the world is completely fearless about it, planned or not. It’s a huge change. You should communicate your fears with Leah. I think she will appreciate knowing she has someone who feels the same – but is also committed to doing it together.”

“Thanks, Em. You’re the best.”

She smiled and got up, bringing Jacob into a comforting hug that her belly got in the way of. He hugged her back, and hesitated when she pulled back, seeing her big belly. He was trying to picture Leah with one that big, but it was unnerving for so many other reasons. Even with her small bump now, it was a far cry from Emily’s and honestly, it wasn’t that big considering she was only just over halfway there. She caught on to his thoughts and smiled, taking his hand and placing it on the top of her belly, over to the right side. He felt a slight flutter against his hand and instead of being weary, he kept it there as Emily pushed his hand in a little more firmly so he could feel the small motions. When they stopped moments later, she let his hand go and he let his hand drop down to his side and sighed, “It’s so unreal.”

Emily laughed, “It’s the miracle of life. Jake?”

“Yeah?”

“Take it day by day. You’ve got the whole teamwork thing down with Leah when on four-paws, and were committed to each other before the baby happened – Renesmee drama aside, so just hold onto that strength and let her know your concerns and you can talk about them and tackle them together. My cousins the toughest girl I know. She knows you’re in this and you love her – she can handle some nerves.”

Jacob hugged her again and thanked her.

“And take advantage of her advances on you,” Emily teased. “The first trimester is rough, the second is better, then the third one is apparently hard for a million new reasons. Enjoy the time that’s left of just the two of you – and all the sex. Communication is key.”

Jacob laughed before opening the door to leave, “Will do. Em? You’re already a good mom – best advice around. And, uh, can you not mention this to Sam?”

She smirked and nodded, “My lips are sealed.”

Jacob walked back to the Clearwater’s, the information Emily gave him turning over in his head the whole way there. When he got there, she was reading a book, bag packed by the couch and she looked up. “Hey, where were you? Seth got back like a half an hour ago.”

He slipped his jacket off and sat beside her, pulling her legs up into his lap. “Just talking to Emily.”

“Don’t tell me you fell in love with Emily, too?” Her words were teasing, but he didn’t find them as amusing as he should have. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong,” he promised, leaning over to kiss her cheek. “Let’s get going.”

They left and packed up the rabbit and he pulled onto the highway, driving the short distance to the cabin. The mood was light the entire way, but he did have some things on his mind – despite his original ask about a carefree night. Finance talk could wait, but he did want to bring something else up. They stopped for ice cream on the way – joking about the last time they were together in the rabbit with sticky dairy products, but kept it PG. They made it to the cabin just before nightfall since they had left later, and Jacob brought everything in and started a fire inside to warm up the evening spring air. Leah cuddled up close to him on the couch for warmth until the fire kicked in after changing into her pajamas.

Jacob sighed and let his fingers gently run up and down the leg of her silky pajama pants. 

“What’s up? You’re not yourself,” Leah commented. “I thought this morning went well, didn’t you? We’re really trying-“

“This morning did go well – thank you,” he said softly, leaning down to press a gentle kiss against her lips.

“Then what is it?” She knew when there was something up with him – neither could keep something from the other for long.

“Uh, well…”

“Spit it out, Jacob.” She was growing impatient, wondering what was on his mind that could make him so nervous – it was making her nauseous. Was it Renesmee? Did he realize how much he missed her after this morning? 

He rubbed the back of his neck and took a breath in. “I’m just a little nervous. The whole… sex when pregnant thing kind of weirds me out.”

He didn’t look at her, and she shifted uncomfortably, glad it wasn’t a Renesmee-issue but now self-conscious for a million other reasons. “I know I haven’t been the best to be around,” she sighed. “I’ve just been so sick and-“

“No, it’s not you,” he promised, meeting her eyes. “I know you’re not feeling well – I get it. I still want to sleep with you, I just… there’s a human inside of you. Our human.”

Leah felt a small smile tug at the corners of her lips, and she nodded, biting her lower lip. “Our human wouldn’t be here without sex,” she informed him. “And he or she won’t remember it, so don’t worry.” Jacob cringed, and Leah’s brow furrowed. “What did I say?”

He shook his head, “Our parents…”

Leah laughed out loud, “Yeah, they probably had sex when we were inutero, too. Gross, huh?”

He laughed, unable to help it, feeling some of the earlier unease leave his body. “We’re going to scar our baby for life.”

Leah grinned and shifted so that she could lean her head against his shoulder. “I love that you care and worry, but you can talk to me, okay? About anything. This is new to both of us. We keep saying how important communication is, and it is important.”

“It’s not new to you,” he replied.

“Yes, me, too. Yeah, I had some basic knowledge that most females have, but I didn’t think I’d be this sick, or tired, or achy, or realize how scary it all is.”

He leaned over and kissed her, silencing anymore reassuring statements that were about to leave her lips and she returned it easily, shifting so that she could wrap her arms around his neck and he could move to hover over her, laying her back on the couch. When their kissing escalated, Leah pulled back. “I’m wide-awake,” she whispered against his lips, meeting his eyes. “And my stomach’s sober as a judge. If you want to take this into your childhood cabin bedroom,” she teased. “As long as there’s not Ninja-turtle sheets.”

Jacob hesitated, but replayed Emily’s words – take all of the intimacy you can get now. “Absolutely – and hey, Ninja turtles are bad ass. Maybe a new theme for the nursery.”

“It may be a girl,” Leah pointed out as she always did when he went off on his son-tangent.

“Pink ninja turtles then,” he shrugged, making her laugh.

He helped her up off the couch and they went into the small cabin bedroom. Despite her teasing about his childhood room, he had taken clean bedclothes and settled themselves into his parents old room. After all, his only had a single bed and although that was fun months ago, now that Leah was pregnant, she deserved a comfy night’s sleep. “Wait, did you really talk to Emily about our sex life?” She asked as she got on the bed and Jacob shut the door.

He shrugged, “Just kind of… asked about her experience with the pregnancy?”

She hesitated before she smirked, “I’m guilty of using her for advice, too.”

“You are?” He grinned, sitting beside her on the bed.

“A few times,” she admitted.

“I’ve got to hear these,” he grinned.

“When she came out on the balcony at the cabin and the morning after you told me about Renesmee she was kind of pivotal in keeping my sanity. She was the first person who I even admitted my feelings about you to – not that I needed to, she already knew. Hell, everyone probably did.”

“I have a proposition,” he said suddenly, taking her hand in his. “What about Sam and Emily as godparents? I mean, Rachel and Seth will be blood-related – aunts and uncles, so that works, and then they could be the godparents?” 

“If you had of told me months ago that I would be pregnant and considering Sam and Emily for the godparents of our baby, I think I would have had a stroke,” Leah said teasingly, evoking a laugh from Jacob. “But… well, you’re right. Rachel and Seth will be honored by being actually related and Sam and Emily have been there for the both of us… She’s also kind of blood-related since she’s family, but not like Seth and Rachel, so I don’t think that would create bad blood between anyone.”

“So not a terrible idea?”

“Not a terrible idea,” she smirked. “Did we really just agree on the godparents to our baby instead of succumbing to our primal urges for sex?” And was it really her ex-boyfriend and the girl who she had such a strained relationship with for so long? 

“Maybe we’re growing up,” he teased.

“Speak for yourself,” she smirked, pulling him close, her lips immediately finding his.

Jacob’s lips didn’t falter on hers. After so long without physical intimacy between them, he hadn’t realized as his body reacted to her just how much he missed it. He gently pulled her on top of him and laid back as she straddled his hips – like the night in the garage and she teasingly rubbed her lower half against his in some kind of entrancing dance. He moaned against her lips and reached up to tangle one hand in her hair, the other digging his fingers into her hip. It was strange – feeling the small protrusion near her hip, and he instinctively loosened his grip on her to avoid hurting her.

“Jacob,” Leah pulled back, resting her forehead against his. “You won’t break me – or the baby, I promise.” He took a shaky breath in and nodded as Leah grinned, “This is probably one of the most vanilla sexual experiences we’ve had. Alone, in a real bed, no wet showers beforehand. And now you’re nervous?”

He smirked, “Just being cautious, Clearwater.”

“I don’t like caution,” she whispered, lowering her lips to the base of his ear. “I like the Alpha-Jacob I know and love. If he was here… well, I think I’d be naked by now.”

Her words evoked a fire in him and he flipped them over – not exactly roughly, but without any prior wariness. “If he were here, huh?” he smirked devilishly as her pools of chocolate looked up into his. “What would he do if he were here? I may need you to spell it out for me – it’s been a while.”

Leah bit her lower lip, his voice husky and taunting in all the right ways. “I think he would make sure these pajama pants didn’t stay on much longer. Then, he would probably kiss up my body – stopping around here,” she reached down and took his hand, moving it up to cup the side of her breast over her shirt. “Then he’d probably come down here,” she moved his hand down her body, until it slipped under her shirt, continuing to move it up and remove her shirt. “Then this would come off pretty quickly.”

Jacob took charge, then. He removed his hand, reached down, removed her pants fluently, then kissed up her entire body, his lips gentle on her supple thigh flesh before he moved his lips around her thong and up her stomach, pushing her tank top up with his mouth as it gravitated to the flesh on her chest. When he got the shirt up and off, he faltered and sighed at the sight of a bra. “Making me work for it, huh?”

“Don’t rip it,” Leah warned. “This is literally the only one that fits me. If you rip it, I’ll-“

“You’ll what?” Jacob smirked, his fingers going to the front. Of course, the clasp was in the back – despite one bra she had on once that actually clasped in the front. What the fuck was up with these bra companies making it so difficult for men to figure these contraptions out? In hindsight, though, the front-clasping one had actually been a lot easier to get off. Though he was pretty used to the back clasp, now. He gently tugged on the material, her chest coming closer to his as he did so. 

She grinned, “I’m serious, Jake-“

Jacob let the material go and her back arched as his hands slipped behind her, undoing the clasp efficiently. “Better than the garage, huh?”

“Did you borrow one of Rachel’s bra’s and play with it?”

“Didn’t need to,” he grinned. “I have you to play with – bra and all.” His lips crashed to hers again as he got the bra away from the bed and onto the floor, silencing anymore banter for a few, breathless moments. “You know, I’m still dressed, are you claiming to be out of practice again? The first time, I understood, but I’ve seen what you can do now, Clearwater.”

Leah’s hands went down, but instead of trying to remove any clothing, she absentmindedly played with the waistband of his jeans before undoing the button with two-fingers and slipping her hand into his pants and boxers, grasping him firmly in her hand and evoking a small sigh to release from his lips as hers gently danced around the flesh on his throat as he hovered over her.

“Are you going to shut up now?” Leah asked, her voice taunting.

“Yes, ma’am,” he groaned, his lips going back to hers as he took his own pants off – then removed her panties as she struggled to get his shirt off. Satisfied they were now fully naked, he pushed into her, not worrying about anything but their bodies coming together again and they both silenced each other’s moans as he moved inside of her. It was slow at first – gentle and loving, but quickly ignited into the fierce and uncontrollable lust they usually fell into together. 

“God, Lee,” he groaned in her ear as he bit her earlobe teasingly. “I’ve missed this.”

“Me, too,” she said between breaths. She met his thrusts with her hips every time, their pace picking up, their bodies growing tense with anticipation. “It’s been too long.”

Jacob groaned, feeling himself losing his resolve more with each time he moved inside her. As it grew unbearable, he pulled out of her, causing the she-wolf to bring a protest to her lips, before he reached down and moved his thumb on her most sensitive nerve endings, causing her to cry out. It didn’t take long – he knew her body well, for her to reach new heights and he groaned, pushing back inside of her as she made blissful noises of pleasure against his lips, causing him, too, to find release.

He groaned loudly, her nails digging into his arms as he stayed above her until he felt his body relax and he rolled over to lie beside her, pulling her against his chest.

Leah’s head rested against him and she draped an arm over his torso. “Guess we don’t need to worry about birth control now,” she teased, feeling his clammy skin against her hand. 

He couldn’t help but to chuckle, “Guess the pull-out method was futile, too, huh?”

“I guess fate had a different idea for us,” she agreed breathlessly. 

They were quiet for a long moment before Jacob broke it, his face growing pensive. “Can I ask you something?”

Leah looked up to him, brow furrowed, hearing the serious tone to his voice. “What’s up?”

Jacob hesitated for a second, “Do you want to get married?”

Leah met his troubled eyes and squirmed out of his arms so that she could sit up and he, too, sat up, facing her. “Where is this coming from?”

He shrugged, “I remember what Renesmee said at dinner – you looked pretty hurt by it. About us not being engaged or married or whatever.”

Leah studied his face intently before sighing, “Jake… I don’t want to get married just because I’m pregnant.”

“That’s not why I’m asking – not the only reason,” he promised. 

She wasn’t sure what to say. Marriage had always been high up on her list when she was a teenager planning out her future. Without her dad here, though, she felt it fall from the top to the bottom. She couldn’t imagine having a wedding where her dad couldn’t give her away – likewise, she didn’t want a shotgun wedding because of a baby.  
“I used to want that,” she said finally. “Without my dad here, though… well, I don’t know if I want it anymore.”

Jacob reached out and took her hand, intertwining their fingers. “You know he wouldn’t want you to miss out on that just because he isn’t here, right?”

“I know,” she admitted. “But I’m just not sure if it’s something I want without him here.”

Jacob nodded understandingly and tried to phrase his next words as sensitively as possible. “Seth could always walk you down the aisle instead.”

Leah nodded, having considered that herself. “Well, that’s a thought for later.”

“What if it doesn’t have to be?”

“Are you proposing marriage, because if so, you’re not doing a very good job. You’re not even on one knee, and I’m not sure the sex endorphins have you thinking clearly,” she teased. 

Jacob chuckled, “Trust me, if I was, you’d know.” He paused, “I don’t want to ask you to marry me, though, if it’s something that you really don’t want anymore. I can appreciate your changed feelings on it, but I just want you to know it is something that I have considered. The baby may speed things up for me – for us, but it wouldn’t be the main reason I’d be asking you. I’ve chosen you – forever, I mean that. Whatever that looks like is for us to decide together, but I want you to know that I’m up for the conversation.”

Leah felt a smile tugging at the corners of her lips, but she sighed, “I’m extremely grateful that you want to do this right but… we’ve already broken all the rules.”

“You’re right, but I’m serious – think about it. If marriage is something you want someday, I need to know that. I know without your dad it’s not the same as what you imagined but it doesn’t mean you have to completely disregard it. I get it – without my mom, it sucks, too. I always thought she would meet my future wife and cry as I said my vows and danced with her. But that doesn’t mean she wouldn’t want me to not do it just because she isn’t here. I appreciate your reasonings – I get them 100%, but don’t give away what you want because Harry isn’t here.” Leah felt tears spring to her eyes and Jacob frowned – that wasn’t what he was going for here. “I’m sorry-“  
Fucking tear ducts! Leah gulped back the emotion as much as she could and shook her head, “It’s fine – it’s the hormones.”

“You know,” he said teasingly. “Having normal, human reactions to things doesn’t mean it’s all the hormones fault.”

“Whatever,” she rolled her eyes, hitting him gently in the shoulder. Maybe she had just grown soft. “Can I think about it?”

“I didn’t think me proposing a proposal would warrant much consideration since you’re housing my child,” he mused.

He looked down to her belly and gently reached out and touched it, sprawling his fingers out onto her skin. 

Leah looked down, too, and licked her lips as he caressed her skin. “I love you – you know that. Me not knowing if I want to get married has nothing to do with my faith in us. I just don’t know if I can do it without my dad.” She wanted the seriousness of the night to fade, then. It warmed her heart that Jacob would consider marrying her – but she wanted it to be without the heaviness of a baby weighing them down. She believed that it wasn’t the only reason but knew it heavily influenced it timing-wise. That, and it was something she felt was lost to her for so long. Without the main concerns of the pregnancy and her heartbreak over her dad not being there, there was also the imprint. A baby solidified them inasmuch as anything ever would and the imprint was still a navigating force. Was a wedding a good idea? She didn’t know. “You know,” she commented, not wanting to think anymore about wedlock tonight. “My dad may not even approve of you.” Jacob looked hurt, and she grinned. “He always told me I had to get a man with a strong stomach – one who likes fishing. I remember you getting sick the last time we were on a boat together,” she said, dredging up a memory from their childhood. Well, it wasn’t that long ago, but she had been sixteen and her dad insisted she go out with him and Seth that day – Billy was taking Jacob, too, and he had spent the entire time clutching a bucket.

Jacob groaned, “I had a stomach bug, Leah!” She started laughing and couldn’t stop. “It’s not funny. Seriously. I told dad that morning I wasn’t feeling well, but nope, he dragged me out anyways.”

Leah finally stopped laughing and wiped tears from her eyes from the amusement. “Whatever, Jake.”

“Listen, your dad wouldn’t approve of this for a whole host of reasons, but, not because of my sick stomach one time. Regardless, I think he would be happy that we’re both happy.”

Leah’s amusement faded, but her smile stayed. “You’re probably right, but in my defense, it was the only time I saw you on a boat, so I think you’re just sea-sick. Not really prime fisherman material, if you ask me and that’s pretty important.”

He rolled his eyes and gently pushed her back on the bed, his face close to hers. “And I think you’re talking too much,” he leaned down to kiss her again, their conversation fading into the night.

Jacob dropped Leah off the next morning with a quick parting kiss before he went to Billy's. He was finally able to start getting his stuff ready to move in. Not that he had a whole lot but with everything going on he didn't have much of a chance before now.

When Jacob left and Leah walked into her house, her jaw dropped, the door ajar, keys falling out of her hand.

The house was a wreck.

An absolute chaotic disaster.

She slowly closed the door and reached down to pick and hang up the keys on the entrance way hook before stepping over the threshold into the open concept living and dining room.

There was some guy passed out on the couch who barely looked thirteen, clothes, confetti, and liquid all over the floor, and empty bottles in every which way all over the mantle and tables, along with ones that had tipped over onto the floor. There was a huge wet spot on the ottoman and junk food wrappers and empty plates everywhere and that wasn't even half of the house. Not to mention the broken bottles she tried to carefully step over.

Her jaw was still open as she looked around, wondering what in the hell had allowed the night before to get so out of hand. In all of her teenage partying days, she had never seen such a state. Of course, her and Sam used to slip off before the party was over, but still.

"SETH!" Leah screamed, her blood boiling.

Their mom was coming over for dinner with Charlie, Billy, and Allison and she was going to FREAK if she saw this. Dinner parties seemed to be the next big thing at her house, but this dinner party was probably warranted considering their children’s impending baby. Turning her attention back to the problem at hand, she was furious. She trusted Seth to be responsible. If this had been her party, her parents would have grounded her for life and oh, she wanted to ground him.

Leah heard whoever was on the couch stir and she went over jostling his shoulder. "Parties over, go home."

The guy awoke sleepily, rubbing his eyes and looking around, clearly dazed and confused.

"Do you need a ride home?"

He shook his head and got up, stumbling a little. "No, no, I'm fine." He looked around and then bolted out of the front door and Leah took a deep breath in before going upstairs. 

Unfortunately, upstairs didn't look any better. There were bottles all over the stairs, clothing in the hallway along with a few pairs of high heels, and the toilet paper was rolled out into the hallway from the bathroom. She peeked her head in and saw vomit all over the toilet, towels all over the floor, the shower curtain pulled to the floor, and more empties. She was going to KILL her brother.

She looked into her room and saw the bed sheets messed up and clothes that wasn't hers or Jacob's on the floor but thankfully the bed was empty and when she got to her mom’s room, the door was still locked from the night before, which was a good sign. She was eternally glad that she didn’t have a UV light because ignorance was best, and she would probably never sleep in her room again if she knew what happened in there. The washing machine would take care of any remaining uncertainty.

Moving back down the hallway, careful not to step into or onto anything, she got to Seth's door and opened it immediately.

He was fast asleep under the covers, his room untouched by the madness of the rest of the house minus clothing sprawled all over the floor. She was about to give him a very rude awakening when she saw a thong on his bedroom floor. At a closer look, she saw Abigail's brown curls on the other pillow, and she couldn't help the urge to move closer. Stepping into his room, and over a bra, she saw Seth's bare chest and Abigail was curled into him, her bare shoulders sticking out.  
Oh, no. No, no, no.

Leah immediately turned to abandon ship but saw a package of condoms on his night table. It was open, along with two wrappers on the floor, and she immediately felt even sicker. Unfortunately, she recognized the box from the one Jacob had in his room that Billy had given him, and she was mad for a whole new reason.  
She left, closing the door quietly and stood outside his room, looking around.  
What was she supposed to do?

Waking Seth up would probably only lead to him throwing up all morning - though probably not with his wolf temp. But should she embarrass him around Abigail? Every instinct told her to give him every bit of shit he deserved and make him clean the house, but she had her fair share of parties when she was younger too and she remembered Seth covering for her a couple of times when she sneaked out to spend time with Sam. Did she do him the same favor? Surely him covering for her a few times wasn't the same as making him clean the entire house by himself, right? Especially while pregnant and tired from her own alcohol-free late night with Jacob.   
Her indecision glued her outside of his bedroom door until finally, her anger subsiding a little, she walked back downstairs and scanned the room again. He was going to pay after he woke up, shook whatever lingering hangover affects were there, and Abigail went home. And then there was the issue of her little brother having sex.  
She thought letting Abigail stay over wasn't harmful which is why she testified it to her mom. Seth was always responsible and although they were imprinted, she also still thought aside from her own sexual history that he would abstain for a while longer. He was her little brother after all and last time she checked they were still really getting to know each other. It had been innocent. But did the alcohol and imprint lead things to new levels? She cringed thinking about it.

She looked at the clock. It was 11 AM. and her mom would probably be there by 3 at the latest. Although Leah promised she would prepare dinner, she knew her mom wouldn't be able to resist the urge to help. Plus, she loved cooking.  
Well, she guessed it was time to get cleaning.

She started by picking up all the empties downstairs, in the kitchen, rec room, stairs, and upstairs. Thankfully, she wasn't feeling terrible this morning because moving around so much was making her a little lightheaded. Once they were taken care of and stored neatly for recycling in the backyard's shed, she picked up all of the food wrappers, silverware, cleaned up two broken glasses, threw out all of the solo cups and disposed of the half eaten food. Next was to pick up everything else laying around, throwing anything of value into a garbage bag for Seth to pick through and give back to whoever left them and threw everything else away and put the garbage-filled bags out on the step. Not to mention she hadn’t gotten sight of either of their new household pets since she got home. She was hoping Seth locked the kitten’s downstairs before the party started, but she wanted to get everything cleaned before she started looking for the two little fluff balls. She had grown fond of them but had other pressing matters right now. 

She vacuumed what she could and then filled up a bucket with hot water, cleaner, and grabbed the mop. She was sweating and feeling a little nauseous from the heat, so she opened the windows for her own benefit and to try and get the overwhelming smell of alcohol out of the house. She felt drunk just inhaling the smell and wondered if the baby would end up high off the fumes. It smelled like a frat house – at least what she thought one would smell like based on Rachel’s stories. She mopped the floors downstairs, scrubbed the ottoman to the best of her ability, and disinfected every surface. Downstairs finally looked presentable and she moved onto to upstairs.

She picked her mom’s lock and was grateful to see the room untouched before going into her room, stripping the bed in disgust, throwing all of the bed sheets into her hamper and throwing out any clothes that weren't hers or Jake's and disinfected everything again, rubbing the sweat off her brow with the back of her forearm.  
She managed to clean up the hall, including wiping down a wall with beer all over it, thankful that there was no carpet aside from the stairs in the house to have to clean. She mopped upstairs and moved into the bathroom where she wiped down the shower curtain, hung it back up despite it now being ripped, and threw all of the towels - soaking wet, into the hamper along with her sheets. To say it was disgusting was putting it mildly and as she looked at the mess someone’s stomach contents had made all over the toilet and floor, she urged.

Her stomach wasn't equipped to deal with vomit on a good day, let alone pregnant.

She immediately left the bathroom, hand over her mouth, and went into her room and opened the window up there, too, taking deep breaths.  
When she finally got hold of her stomach, she went back into the bathroom, grabbing a clean cloth from the linen closet to put over her mouth along with gloves and managed to clean everything else up and disinfect the bathroom - only stopping twice to throw up herself in the process.

Her eyes were watering, the breakfast Jacob had cooked earlier long gone, and she felt nauseous for a million new reasons. Finally, once upstairs was cleaned minus Seth's room, she brought all the laundry down to the basement to wash and found more empties, plates, and two bodies on the couch. Luckily (and causing her extreme relief), she also saw the two kittens curled together and asleep on the armchair nearby, unharmed and unphased by the prior night’s destruction. At least they were in-tact.

"Get out!" Leah yelled, before looking over and seeing Quil's frame there, kissing some blond girl.

"Leah!" He cried, scurrying to grab his shirt and throw the blond her own.

"What the fuck, Quil! My house is a disaster zone!"

Quil shied under Leah's clear anger and the girl got up and quickly threw her shirt on before leaving. "Leah, I'm sorry - I didn't realize. Jasmine and I came down here before the party got started and we were talking and ended up down here all night -"

"Jasmine?" She asked, putting a hand on her hip. She sighed before bringing the laundry over and dumping it in, starting the washer. "Well, I addition to cleaning up bottles, food, vomit, clothing, and disinfecting the entire house while my innocent little brother sleeps, I'm not in the mood to heed off your sexual escapades, so how about you don't try to bone a girl on my couch where Seth plays video games?"

"We didn't-" Quil started. "Please don't tell the guys. I'm getting enough heat from the whole imprint thing..." Leah sighed and turned to face him as he got up and helped her clean up the few bottles down there. "Leah, please-"

"I won't," she promised. "But seriously, next time at least look out for Seth because what I've dealt with this morning has been a disaster and he's going to get it from me later, but you're supposed to look out for him and are just as responsible for this. My mom only agreed when I promised her you and Embry would be here. Where’s he anyways?”

“He left early last night,” he admitted. "Leah, I'm really sorry."

"Go home, Quil," she sighed. "Jacob and my mom will be here any minute and I've still got damage control to do."

"I can help," he offered.

"I got it covered, but thanks."

Quil left, feeling extremely guilty, and finally, when everything was clean, Leah went back upstairs and saw Abigail leaving.

"Good morning," Leah said, less than cheerfully. She couldn’t wait to jump in the shower and disinfect her body.

Abigail turned and flinched, clutching her high heels and jacket to her chest. Her hair was a mess, makeup smeared, and she didn’t look too well. “Leah…”

“Care to explain the hazardous state the house was in when I came home this morning?” She asked, placing a hand on her hip.

She knew Abigail was intimidated by her - Seth had spoken to that before. After all, Leah was Seth’s sister and as his girlfriend, she really wanted to be liked by her. Unfortunately, right now that attempt seemed futile. 

“We were going to get up early and clean up-”

“That’s why you’re sneaking out? Is Seth awake?”

Abigail frowned, shifting uncomfortably under Leah’s scrutiny. “No, he’s still asleep.”

Leah raised a brow, clearly curious about Abigail’s escape, but before she could ask any further questions, she saw Abigail bolt for the door. Leah followed, clearly concerned, and saw Abigail drop her belongings and grip the patio railing before spilling the contents of her stomach into the bushes beneath. Leah groaned, feeling her own stomach turn at the sight and she realized Jacob had just pulled into the driveway.

When he saw Abigail and Leah on the patio, he was trying to balance two, large boxes in his arms full of his things, but he immediately put them down and went toward the house as Leah disappeared back inside, seeming green herself. Jacob went over to Abigail as she took a deep breath and wiped her eyes dry of the moisture cascading down her cheeks.

”Are you okay?” He asked gently.

She nodded, tears filling her eyes again. “I’m fine. I just… I’m really sorry, I have to go.”

She grabbed her things quickly and ran off the patio. Jacob raised a brow and went inside. “Leah?” She came out of the main floor bathroom, trying to regulate her breathing. 

“Sorry. My stomach isn’t what it used to be,” she sighed.

He chuckled and went over to her, pulling her close, smelling the usual smell of mouthwash and the unusual smell of disinfectant coating her skin. “How are you now?”

”Alright, but if I have to see anymore vomit-”

”Anymore?”

”Oh, you should have saw the house when you dropped me off,” she said unhappily. “I’ve been cleaning up since I got home. Puke and all.”

Jacob grimaced, “I’m sorry, I should have come in and checked.”

”It’s not your fault. I was going to make Seth clean it up but when I went to give him hell, I realized you deserve it, too.”

”Me? What did I do?”

”Well, Abigail and him were in his bed together, naked from what I could tell, with the box of condoms that looks suspiciously close to the ones you had open on his night table.”

Jacob groaned, his clear unease giving him away. “Leah-”

”You could have at least told me!”

”He asked for them but said he wasn’t intending to use them, he just wanted to be prepared! Would you rather Abigail end up like this?” He asked, gesturing to her little belly. 

“Not fair,” Leah said. “I just want to be in the loop! He’s my brother, Jacob.”

”I’m sorry, okay?” He put up his hands in defense. “I’ll tell you from now on, but he asked me not to and he was being safe. I talked to him and I was trying to build back our relationship considering it’s been pretty strained since the whole pregnancy thing.”

Leah sighed, resigning from the argument. “I get it.”

Jacob reached out to pull her close. “I’ll talk to him, okay?”

Leah nodded and wrapped her arms around his waist, resting her head on his chest. “Fine. He better wake-up hungover, though - he deserves to pay for the mess in some way.”

“Sister of the year,” he smirked. “Rebecca never would have cleaned the entire house after my party.”

“I think you’re underestimating your sister.”

”Nah, she just likes the tough love mantra. Rachel may have – but not Rebecca. I think she would have taken pictures and held them as blackmail.”

“Well, I was going to get him up to clean but then when I walked in and saw him and Abigail, I bailed.”

“See? Best sister ever.”

Leah rolled her eyes, “Did you bring your stuff over? I’ve got to shower and start dinner before my mom gets here.”

”I’ll bring it in,” he kissed her cheek before going back outside.

As Jacob brought all of his things in, Leah showered and began dinner and shortly after, her mom and Charlie came by. Jacob had put all of his things up in Leah’s room, minus his game console and a couple of boxes that he had in the living room and sat down talking to Charlie as Sue ventured into the kitchen.

”Everything under control?”

”Absolutely. Sit down and relax,” Leah said as her mom pulled up a stool to the island. 

“Where’s Seth?”

”In bed, I think. You’re lucky he’s alive,” she mused as she stirred the pots on the stove.

”What happened?” Sue asked, clearly alarmed considering her children frequently ended up in life or death situations because of the pack.

Leah, realizing she worried her mom, sighed and turned, leaning against the counter to face the island. “I almost killed him. You should have seen the mess. It took me all morning and a good part of the afternoon to clean it up.”

Sue frowned, “And he’s still asleep?”

“Yeah, I took one for the team, but when he gets up I’m making sure he knows he’s on dish and laundry-duty for a week.” Sue smiled at her daughter, and Leah’s brow furrowed. “This isn’t amusing.”

“You just sound… motherly,” Sue grinned. “It’s a good thing. How is the pregnancy?”

“Alright,” Leah said, turning back to the stove to watch the pots. “Cleaning did me in this morning, but I’m getting pretty hungry now. Other than the nausea I still feel pretty normal aside from a little cramping and some minor aches and pains.”

”Pregnancy suits you,” Sue said softly.

”If you tell me I’m glowing, I’m going to scream,” she laughed. “Jacob thinks it’s hilarious.”

Sue smirked, “You just seem happy.”

”I am,” she said honestly, checking the pot roast. 

“And how’s Jacob doing with the news?”

”Good. Really good. He brought all his stuff over today so we’re going to organize it tonight. Or, well, he is going to - I’m exhausted.”

”So things are good?”

”Things are great,” Leah said, walking over to lean on the other side of the island. “He’s… everything I could have asked for as the father of my child. It still seems insane to say that, but it’s true.”

Sue reached out and squeezed Leah’s hand. “Your father would be so happy.”

Leah’s smile softened, and she gulped back a lump forming in her throat because of the mention of her dad and her and Jacob’s conversation the night before. “I don’t know. This is… well, a lot different than tradition, but it’s nice that dad at least met someone so important in my life.” She had been thinking about Jacob’s words ever since. It kept her from screaming earlier when cleaning up. At least she knew her father had always liked Jacob – something Seth had pointed out to her, before, too. Minus her teasing about his weak stomach at sea.

”He would love you regardless, you know that.”

Then, as if on cue to stop her from crying, Seth came into the kitchen. 

“Good morning sleepy head,” Sue teased.

Seth gave her a small, forced smile before grabbing a glass of water.

”Hungover?” Leah asked, secretly wishing he felt a little bad about the disaster the night before.

”Nah, just thirsty,” Seth replied, tight-lipped.

”What’s up?” Leah asked. 

“Nothing,” he said simply, gulping back a glass of water. “You didn’t have to clean up, I was going to.”

”I didn’t have to?” Leah asked, raising a brow feeling her momentary sappiness turn into anger. “We’re having people over for dinner, Seth, did you forget about that when you decided to roll out of bed at 3:30?”

”Sorry, okay?” He snapped back, clearly agitated. 

”Well, you’re on dish and laundry-duty for the next month.”

”Fine,” he said, pushing back out of the kitchen and into the living room where he sat on the opposite side of the couch that Jacob was on. Jake and Charlie were watching some fishing channel on TV and Seth was able to quietly blend into the background.

“He better lose the attitude before Billy gets here,” Leah commented, making Sue smirk at her daughter’s maturity. Moody teenaged Seth was a new development to handle for both women.

“Maybe he had a fight with Abigail?”

”Maybe,” she said, remembering Abigail’s quickness to leave this morning. 

Leah finished dinner and shared some idle chit-chat with her mom as the guys stayed in the living room. It was almost ready when they heard Billy and Allison come in and they all went into the living room to greet them.

Allison hugged Leah, “Congratulations. Sam told me.”

She smiled and hugged her back, “Thanks.”

”You’re going to be a great mom,” Allison said, beaming as she pulled back. “It’s funny how everything works out, huh?”

”Very,” Leah agreed. “Congratulations to you, too, on becoming a grandmother soon.”

Allison smiled, grateful Leah’s broken heart seemed to have mended and she could be a part of her son’s life again. They always fit well together, even just as friends. “Yes, I can’t wait. Well, we’re all either already or about to be grandparents,” Allison commented to all of the adults in the room.

“We sound so old,” Sue laughed.

“I’ve got two on the way, so I feel really old,” Billy mused.

“How’s Rebecca doing?”

“Good from what she tells me. She’ll be home for Rachel’s wedding in June.” It wasn’t that far away, now, and Leah was excited about seeing her old friend – until she realized she was also knocked up by that old friend’s brother. She wasn’t sure how much Rebecca knew, but she was betting she was going to get her endless teasing, too, when she came back. 

“How exciting,” Sue exclaimed as Leah went back into the kitchen to check on everything. 

Jacob followed her and snaked his arms around her waist as she took everything out of the oven and turned it off. She turned toward him, grinning, and wrapped her arms around his neck. “I’ve got an idea.”

”An idea?”

”Instead of unpacking tonight, maybe we could do something else…” He ran his hand up from her waist, to gently graze her boob. “If you’re up for it…”

Leah grinned, pushing her body closer to him and moving her hand from his side, down to the front of his jeans, gently stroking him over his pants. “I like that idea.”

He smirked and pulled back, not wanting to get too hot and heavy in her kitchen when their parents were on the other side of the wall. “Do you need any help?”

”I’ve got it.”

Sue came in a few moments later and helped her get everything out onto the table and they all migrated into the formal dining area. Conversation pursued about her pregnancy, Allison happily engaged in conversation about Emily’s, and Billy brought up Rebecca every now and then. It was like one, big, happy family and Leah was starving for the first time in a long time and ended up going for seconds.

”So Carlisle still doesn’t know exactly when you’ll be due?” Allison asked.

”Not yet. He speculates sometime around September, but he’s not 100% sure. He said he’ll know more in the coming weeks.”

”Emily’s due in August, so maybe you’ll have them close together. They can have play dates.”

”Maybe,” Leah smiled. It was always their dream to have kids together, but it was a lot different than either of them pictured. Regardless, she was confident now that things turned out for the best.

”So, Sue,” Billy said. “About their living arrangements…”

”I told them they could stay here, just because I know you’ve got Rachel and Paul. I’ve been between here and Charlie’s, but Leah’s been pushing me to stay at his place now that she’s managing a little better, so there’s extra space and room here. Seth’s going to move downstairs into the rec-room and we’ll change his room into the nursery.”

”We’re going to pay the bills,” Jacob informed his dad. “I’ve got some gigs set up fixing cars around the reservation and I’ve looked into a few other side-jobs to earn some cash. Embry’s mom got me some tentative work fixing up a few gazebos on the beach and one of the guys there needs some help with renovations on his house, so it’s all a help.” He didn’t want to mention the money from the Cullen’s, knowing his dad would think it was a handout despite his adoration for Bella before she decided immortality was better than breathing. 

“Embry’s mom also said I can help out until I have the baby with some part-time shift coverage down at the souvenir shop on the beach,” Leah added.

Sue nodded, glad they were taking responsibility for their future financially. “Since the house is paid off, it’s no trouble if they want to take over the utilities. Plus, I’ll help them where I can.”

Billy took it all in, “What can I do?”

“We’re fine, really, dad,” Jacob countered. “Once the baby’s born, Leah’s going to look into school again and I’ll hopefully have a little garage business set up by then for some more stable work and eventually graduate.”

“Actually, I was talking to Emily and since we are due around the same time, she said if I need her to watch the baby while I go to class she’s more than willing. She’s going to take until after Christmas off, so that will be a help, plus she said she may be able to pull some strings and get the baby into the daycare on site at the community college since she teaches there so I can still go to class in September.”

”I can help, too, with childcare,” Billy offered. “You should get your education. Anything you need, let me know. Plus if Jacob transforms the garage at the house into a real working garage, then we can both manage watching the baby while you’re in class pretty easily. I’m sure Rachel will help, too, when she can between working. Her hours are weird, and I know she’s really excited about being an aunt.”

”Thank you, Billy,” Leah said, feeling her heart warm. Things were still uncertain, but at least they had a tentative plan that seemed to work and be supported. It made her feel less nervous and her and Jacob had begun to iron some other things out financially on the ride home this morning. “We wanted to ask you something, actually, Seth,” Leah said, turning to her brother who had been eerily quiet. “I know mom’s at Charlie’s all of the time, and with the house paid off considering it was always supposed to be ours anyways, I thought maybe Jacob and I could get it appraised when we get on our feet and buy you out of your share. It would give you enough to get your own place someday, but we’re going to need the extra room for the baby - of course, you can stay here as long as you want, but when you decide to settle down and want your own place, I just thought maybe you’d appreciate the offer.”

Sue was impressed with their ability to multi-manage the pregnancy and finances and look into the future, but Seth frowned. “Why do you automatically get the house just because you’re having a baby?”

Leah was a little taken aback at his tone and frowned, “I don’t automatically get it. I’m asking your opinion on it.”

Seth dropped his fork and sighed. He had bags under his eyes and Leah wondered how much sleep he got, despite being in bed most of the day. “This is my home, too. I want to savor it just as much as you do since it’s the only place that we have to really remember dad.”

“Okay,” Leah said, trying not to cause a fight at the table. “We can talk about it later, it’s just a suggestion, Seth.”

“The cabin is an option, too,” Billy offered, trying to manage the situation. “If things don’t pan out here. It needs some cosmetic work, but it’s yours to stay in if you need it. Rebecca won’t be back here, and Rachel declined it when Paul and her got engaged to be closer to family here and they’re looking at houses closer to town, but it’s not too far and it has the space.”

”Thanks, dad,” Jacob said, appreciating the offer as Leah thanked him as well.

”We can all talk about it later,” Sue said gently, wanting to talk to Seth and Leah about this in private before any decisions were made.

It grew silent as everyone continued eating and Seth played with the food on his plate before sighing, “I’m sorry. I know you need the space. I know you’re much more serious than Abigail and I, and if you need the house-”

”Seriously,” Leah said honestly, reaching over to place her hand on Seth’s. “It’s just an idea. I don’t want you to feel forced out or that you have to take the offer. It just came up when Jacob and I were trying to figure things out.”

”I know, I didn’t mean to be a jerk. We can talk about.”

Leah gave him a small smile and Jacob put a hand on her knee as she reached for another roll.

”Hungry?” Jacob chuckled. “I haven’t seen you eat so much since you left the pack.” He was really glad to see her appetite picking back up. 

”She is eating for two,” Allison teased.

Leah laughed, and Sue jumped back into conversation with Billy about ways they could help Jacob and Leah as much as possible despite both of their claims to be able to do this without their financial assistance - or so they hoped. The Cullen’s investment into their family was more than enough to cover bills for a while and take care of any other costs, but they didn’t want to mention that to their parents just yet. 

“How’s Abigail?” Allison asked Seth. “Sam told me about the imprint.”

Seth looked up at the mention of Abigail’s name and hesitated, “She’s fine.”

Sue picked up on his foul mood again and frowned, “Did you two have a fight?”

”No,” he said simply, not elaborating further.

”You know,” Jacob said, butting in. “Leah and I fight all the time - we always manage to work it out, and you know how bad it used to get,” he said, trying to make light of the situation.

”I don’t want to talk about it, alright?” He said, confirming their suspicions.

”She seemed fine when she left this morning,” Leah said finally. “I mean, she was a little… uh, green, probably from one too many vodka cranberry’s, but she seemed normal as usual.”

”Seriously,” Seth sighed. “I don’t want to talk about it. Please.”

“We can talk later,” Sue said softly.

”What don’t you all get?” Seth exclaimed, standing up from the table. “I don’t want to talk about it with you,” he said to his mom. “Or either of you,” he turned to Leah and Jacob. “I wish dad was here!” He stormed off, and Leah frowned. Sue wanted to go after him, knowing this was extremely uncharacteristic for him, but felt the weight of his words to not want her and want his dad gluing her to her seat.

Of course, a young teenage boy needed male guidance. That used to be Jacob, but now, with his complicated relationship with his sister, he had pushed him away, too.

Billy hesitated before looking to Sue. “I’ll go talk to him.” She nodded her thanks, giving him a small smile, feeling her own heart hurting. “Son?”

Jacob nodded and helped his dad up the stairs to Seth’s room before putting his wheelchair back on the floor. Billy knocked on Seth’s door and Jacob went back downstairs. 

“Seth?” Billy asked. “Can I come in?”

Seth hesitated, but got off his bed and went over to open the door for Billy before going back to rest against his headboard. His room was still a mess from the night before, but he at least put the condoms away. It still smelled like alcohol, his sheets were a mess, and he had the blinds shut, the room only dimly lit from the lamp on his bedside table.

Billy wheeled in and closed the door behind him, giving him a fatherly smile. “I was thinking that since your dad isn’t available, maybe I could step in?”

Seth hesitated, not wanting to be mean to Billy, embarrassed by his behavior downstairs, and torn about his night with Abigail and needing some guidance but not wanting to tell anyone what happened. “I appreciate it,” he said finally. “But it’s kind of private.”

Billy nodded understandingly, “I get that. You don’t have to tell me, I just wanted you to know that I’ve raised Jacob and two daughters, so I get that sometimes things can be difficult to talk about, but if you need some advice from an impartial male who’s got many years of experience dealing with life, I’m here.”

Billy turned to leave and respect Seth’s privacy, but he heard him sigh. “Billy?” He turned back around and faced Seth, seeing the confliction playing out on his face.

”It’s… really embarrassing. I don’t want to talk to my mom about it - or Leah or Jacob. Or anyone, really…”

”I’ve had my fair share of embarrassing. I’m all ears if you want to talk about it - no judgement.”

Seth hesitated and wouldn’t meet Billy’s gaze. “Well…Abigail stayed over last night… She has been for a while, but we, uh, had the house to ourselves so we figured we could…” He didn’t have to say it, Billy nodded encouragingly when he looked up and he continued. “When everyone left, we came up here and… well, y’know, started kissing and stuff, but…”

Seth frowned and stopped, not even wanting to think about it let alone discuss it. He sighed and rubbed his face with his hands, feeling exhausted and embarrassed. 

“Seth?” Billy said warmly, wanting him to trust him. “Physical intimacy is complicated - and extremely awkward at first.”

”This is worse than awkward!” He cried, unable to meet Billy’s eyes as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “We just… we drank way too much, and I couldn’t… I couldn’t… I wanted to, but I just couldn’t, uh, perform.”

Billy was a little out of his comfort zone himself. Although he had given Jacob a mediocre safe sex talk - which seemed futile now, Jacob was never really forthcoming with his sexual life with Billy but Seth clearly was out of his depth here, extremely embarrassed, and needed an older male’s advice, and Billy wanted to fill Harry’s shoes for the younger Clearwater. “When you drink too much it can impair your body’s reaction to sex,” he offered. “It’s completely normal. Plus, if it was your first time, nerves can also play a huge factor.”

”She probably thinks I’m a freak,” Seth sighed. “She barely spoke to me before she left.”

”She was probably just as embarrassed as you were,” Billy stated. “Can I offer some advice?” Seth met his gaze, his cheeks heated from the embarrassment, and nodded. “You really should be able to talk about sex openly before you engage in it. Communication is the key to having a… positive sexual experience. Talk to Abigail and explain how you feel and I bet she’ll mirror your feelings.”

Seth sighed, “Thanks, Billy.”

”Always an eventful dinner at the Clearwater’s,” Leah sighed from downstairs.

Charlie squeezed Sue’s hand, “Billy will talk to him - he’ll sort it out.”

She smiled softly and the innocent conversation continued. It was only after Billy returned back downstairs with the help of Seth, and he, too, joined the table again that Leah went to get dessert. Billy started talking fishing with Charlie and it was like nothing happened.

She came back out with a raspberry cheesecake that her and Jacob had picked up on the way home from the cabin and Leah served it, the atmosphere returning to the prior easy-going environment. 

It turned out to be a nice evening and once they discussed some more technicalities of the pregnancy and financial details, Billy went over to put a hand on Seth’s shoulder and whisper something to him before he and Allison left.

Sue cleaned up since Leah cooked and Charlie helped. Seth went upstairs to his room, wanting to avoid his mom’s questioning gaze - and the pain behind her eyes at his mention of Harry, and Leah turned to Jacob. “You know what that was about, don’t you?”

She had lost her wolf-hearing, but Jacob hadn’t. He hesitated and nodded, “Yeah I overheard.”  
“Is he okay?”

“He’ll be fine,” he promised. “My dad helped.”

She frowned, “Do I want to know?”

Jacob shook his head, “Nah. I wouldn’t want my sisters to know. Honestly, he’s fine. It was just… an awkward night with Abigail.”

”Awkward?”

”First times are rarely perfect, despite your ideal first time with Sam and our… well, explosive evening. As much as Paul claims to be a sex-guru to piss me off, he and Rachel had a rocky beginning, too. Don’t ask me how I know, I’d honestly rather not,” he chuckled. “But it just didn’t go as well as it should have.” Leah felt bad for her little brother. As much as she didn’t want him being intimate yet, she knew it was a big deal - and would be for him and wanted his life to be easy and carefree. Jacob reached over to gently tap her nose. “He’s fine, honestly. My dad was… a good confident for him, I promise. It was a little awkward, but he trusts him and respects his advice like he would have your dads.” Leah nodded and leaned into Jacob on the couch as he threw a blanket over her and she yawned. “Let’s relax and watch something on TV.”

Leah frowned, “What about your insinuation earlier…”

“You’re tired – and had a rough day cleaning up. We have the rest of our lives to explore each other’s bodies,” he promised. “Get some sleep.” He kissed her forehead and he cuddled her close as he watched TV, Leah falling asleep in his arms.


	20. It's a...

Rachel had insisted that Leah, Jacob, Billy, and Paul attend the spring recital that Jeremy had kept asking her to be in. Leah had managed to get the day off from the souvenir shop which was now open and in full swing. Now that her morning sickness was officially gone - aside from some infrequent nausea, she was able to pull close to full-time hours working with Tiffany and liked keeping busy. They pulled into a larger studio farther outside of town into a full parking lot and they all got out of the car. Rachel had driven herself earlier to get ready and once they got inside the doors, Jeremy was there to meet them at the door, taking tickets.

”Hey!” He said happily, raising a brow at her now noticeable belly in her black, form-fitted tank top under her jean jacket. “You’re glowing, Leah,” he said as he reached out to hug her quickly with the line-up growing behind them.

Although she hated the phrase, his words were filled with endearment and she thanked him, hugging him back briefly. “Thanks - how’s Jamie?”

Jeremy gave her a small smile, “Doing good. Responding really well to treatment.”

”I’m so glad to hear that.”

Jacob came behind her and Jeremy outstretched his hand. “Congrats, man. Parenthood is crazy, but it’s worth every minute. You’ve got a strong woman to do it with, too. It’ll be a breeze.”

Jacob shook his head politely and nodded, “Thanks. Sorry about, well, everything…”

“It’s in the past.”

They all ushered inside, and Jacob took Leah’s hand as Paul pushed Billy into the wheelchair area. They followed, having designated seats next to Billy as per Rachel’s influence.

”That wasn’t as awkward as I thought it would be,” Jacob admitted.

Leah grinned, “Well I am pregnant with your baby, so being an ex after dating for a few weeks really isn’t a huge claim.”

He chuckled and led her to their seats. She sat between him and Paul in a small section next to the wheelchair area. Billy was on Jacob’s other side and they all waited for the recital to start. Once it did, Leah felt a small tug of jealousy for not being able to have danced in it seeing all the beautiful costumes, swift and accurate movements of the dancers, and the look of joy they had. 

When Rachel came on, they were all fixated with her. She was beautiful. She did three dances and managed not to trip long enough to perform flawlessly. Leah was so proud of her and so was Paul who gave her two big bouquets of roses when she met them later once the show ended.

“You were great, Rach!”

“Thanks,” she giggled, holding the roses with one arm and giving her friend a one-armed hug with the other. “I’m glad you came.”

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

Later that week, with Rachel and Paul’s wedding only days away and her pregnancy timeline approaching halfway and Emily entering her third trimester, Jacob had finally dug out Seth’s old crib from down in the Clearwater basement. Seth had officially moved his room into the rec room downstairs and Jacob had assembled the crib in his old room and was just waiting to start painting. It was a dark grey right now, but Leah already had the color swatches picked out for the baby’s room depending on gender. Green for a boy, and purple for a girl – though he was confident he would be painting green if his gut instincts were right. He kept telling her it was a boy, but she kept rolling her eyes and telling him they’d have to wait and see. Even though she kept telling him it may be a girl, she was leaning toward a boy, too. 

The day they finally found out what they were having was finally here, though. They could finally put to bed their assumptions and being preparing for the little boy or girl soon to rock their worlds and as they drove to the Cullen’s and got out of the rabbit – that he had recently installed a car seat in making all of this super real, they went into the Cullen’s mansion and were greeted as usual by Carlisle.

Bella and Renesmee were in the living room and they shared a friendly hello before Carlisle ushered them into his study again. Renesmee had attended one of the ultrasounds - along with Rachel and Seth, as promised and it went smoothly. This one, though, was just for the two of them. Leah had thanked them, too, for their gracious financial assistance. “How are things going?”

“Good,” Leah said, Jacob helping her up onto the table. “Getting bigger which makes things harder to do, but at least the nausea is gone now.” 

He did a quick examination and measurement of her belly. “You’re measuring for about twenty-weeks,” he said finally before pulling the ultrasound machine over and putting the familiar blue goo on her belly. He started the machine and moved the small wand around and grinned. “Healthy and strong heartbeat. Definitely growing. Any flutters yet?”

Leah shook her head, “I don’t think so.”

“You’ll know. You’ll start feeling them soon. Usually between twenty and twenty-five weeks. For you, probably within the next couple of weeks if not sooner.”

“Exciting,” Jacob said as he watched the small baby-looking figure move as Carlisle pointed out some developments on the ultrasound. At least now their little guy or girl finally looked like a real baby and not a sea creature. Paul constantly teased them that the next ultrasound they’d see the baby transform into a litter of pups.

“Do you want to know the gender?”

Leah shared a brief glance with Jacob before grinning, “Jake thinks it’s a boy, so I guess we’re ready to find out for sure.”

Carlisle chuckled and looked away from the screen, back to Jacob and Leah with a smile on his face. “Jacob’s right,” he said happily, watching the amazement spread on both of their faces – and tears accumulate in Leah’s eyes.

“A boy,” she whispered.

“I was right. I don’t hear that too often,” Jacob grinned, leaning down to kiss her. 

She laughed and kissed him back before turning back to the screen. “We’re having a son…”

Carlisle smiled and printed out some more images for them, handing them to Jacob before turning off the screen, rubbing the gel off Leah’s growing belly, and finishing some normal checks. “Keep doing what you’re doing, you’re on track right now to a mid-September delivery but that could change since it’s only June so I still want to do weekly checks.”

“Sounds good, doc,” Jacob agreed. 

They left the room and went out into the living room where Nessie and Bella were smiling. “A boy, huh?” Bella asked excited, giving Jacob a hug in congratulations before Nessie followed suit and Carlisle gave Leah some more tips for trying to sleep comfortably, what to expect when she started to feel the baby move, and other milestones quickly approaching in the doorway. 

“Congratulations, Leah,” Renesmee said, approaching her.

It said a lot to how good she was feeling that she reached out and hugged Renesmee. The younger girl was surprised, but hugged her back, grateful for the new acceptance between the two girls in Jacob’s life. He called her every few days to talk and make sure she was okay between the visits she made with Carlisle for Leah’s checks and things were really starting to improve. Knowing Nessie had been struggling, her dad also invited Nahuel to visit the Denali’s to brighten her mood. It worked and she was excited to have someone around who was just like her.

When they pulled back, Bella gave Leah a bright smile. “A little Jacob running around,” she mused. “You’re going to have your hands full.”

Leah laughed, but Jacob was the one who responded. “A wolf chief in the making,” he said proudly. Leah watched the adoration on his face as he spoke about their son, and she felt her heart clench. At this rate it felt like her heart was going to burst open before she even saw their little guy’s face outside of an ultrasound screen. She tried not to worry too much about their son being a wolf later in life and just enjoy the time they had now. She had dreamed about being pregnant for a very long time and although it wasn’t what she originally anticipated, she was elated.

“I’m really happy for you both,” Bella said softly, placing a hand on Renesmee’s shoulder. “She’s the best thing that ever happened to Edward and I. You’re in for something beautiful.”

Leah absentmindedly found her hand going to rest on her small bump and let her fingers dance over it through the fabric of her shirt. She had worn a form fitted tank-top today, which accentuated her bump. Emily’s was bigger than hers was by quite a bit, but Leah was speedily catching up with the baby’s accelerated growth rate.

“Any names picked out?” Carlisle asked warmly. 

Leah, for the first time ever, finally felt at-ease with the Cullen’s. At least with Carlisle, Bella, and Renesmee – and admittedly Edward, so she didn’t mind staying to chat despite the smell that still tormented her. Morning sickness gone or not, they still stunk. “Nothing yet. We’ve joked about a few back and forth but nothing solid.”

“Guess I’m getting the green paint on the way home?” Jacob mused.

“Green it is.”

“We can always try for a girl next time,” Jacob winked at her and she grinned but shook her head exasperatedly.

“Let’s focus on having this one first, ‘k?”

He shrugged, “Just saying. We may as well have a litter – for the pack’s sake. What’s a few more? ‘Gotta keep the pack strong – it’s my Alpha duty.”

Jacob’s words were teasing, but she knew that he was all-in with her and as long as the imprint continued to stay at-bay, they had the potential of a future with more children and a life together long-term. It was still surreal after all they had been through. “Like I said, one at a time,” she smirked. “Maybe we’ll have all boys, who knows. I think boys would be easier, honestly.”

“You are a handful,” Jacob smirked.

“Female emotions are nothing in comparisons to some of the stupid stuff you did,” Leah pointed out, realizing they still had an audience although they seemed amused at their banter – even Renesmee.

“I don’t remember doing anything especially stupid,” he shrugged.

Leah raised a brow, “Did you hit your head lately? Where should I start? As a kid? Pre-Teen? Teenager?”

“I can attest to that,” Bella taunted.

Jacob chuckled and snaked his arm around Leah, pulling her close. Renesmee watched them lovingly, realizing seeing them together no longer hurt her as much. Jacob was happy, and that was all she wanted for him. Likewise, things were improving for her, too, now that he wasn’t avoiding her, and the imprint was more or less soothed by their communication. “How’s Rachel’s wedding coming along?” Renesmee asked. 

“It’s coming along,” Jake remarked. “Not much longer now. They’re trying to find an apartment nearby for now – until Paul controls his temper completely. Dad said they can stay there for as long as necessary – I think he’s having trouble with the empty-nest thing, but they want their own place now that they’ll be man and wife.” Jacob made a gagging noise at the implications behind it, but Leah smirked and hit him playfully in the chest. 

“They’re happy,” she said finally. “And he treats Rachel great. Plus, they’ll probably want to start a family of their own eventually.”

“I never thought you’d defend Paul,” he teased. “But yeah, I guess I couldn’t ask for much better for her. Rebecca and Solomon are getting in later today actually. Rachel and Paul are going back to Hawaii with them for their honeymoon so at least I won’t have to witness that smooch-fest.”

“Did you just say smooch-fest?” Leah asked, quirking a brow. “You sound… like a dad.”

Bella laughed, “Better get used to your parental roles now because the little time you have left is the only time you’ll ever just be the two of you anymore.”

“You mean… alone time is limited,” Jacob mused, winking to Leah. “See? We really should start working on baby #2 now before a infant has us up all night and too tired to-“

“Okay,” Leah cut him off, stepping away from him. “Even if that’s how it worked – and it’s not, it’s time to go. I promised Rachel I’d help her turn your room into an acceptable guest room for Rebecca and Solomon and if you say baby #2 again before this one turns five, I may have to kick your ass once this one’s born.”

Carlisle smiled, “Yes, let’s get her through this pregnancy - safely, first.”

“C’mon, Clearwater, let’s go buy the paint and get your back to the res to tell everyone the good news. I’m sure Rebecca’s going to hug you to death.”

They said their goodbyes, stopped at the paint shop on the way home, and made their way over to Billy’s where Sue and Charlie were hanging out, waiting for them to come back along with Seth, Paul, and Rachel. 

“So…” Rachel said as soon as they walked into the living room and sat down. It was crammed for space and Leah sat on the couch beside Rachel – Paul having got up to make room and stand by Jacob near the window on the far side of the tiny space.

Leah looked to her mom and brother, then to Billy and grinned before turning her attention back to Rachel. “You’re going to have a nephew,” she told her, her eyes going back to Seth, then to Billy and Sue.

“A grandson,” Billy said as soon as Sue’s eyes started filling with tears.

Rachel pulled her friend into a hug immediately and Seth went over to Jacob to congratulate him as Jacob pulled him into a hug, messing up his hair. Sue hugged them both, as did Billy, and Leah found her own tear ducts stimulating again unsurprisingly. 

“So… does this mean we can start getting the nursery together?” Rachel asked excitedly.

“It does – we picked up the paint on the way home,” Jacob replied happily.

“A boy,” Sue said again. 

“A little Jacob,” Rachel laughed. “Oh God help you both.”

“Hey!” Jacob exclaimed in mock-outrage as they all laughed. “We needed a strong alpha male to continue the pack’s heritage and we got it.”

“A girl would have done the same thing,” Leah pointed out again.

“Well you’ve got plenty of time to have more,” Rachel teased, winking.

“Don’t encourage him,” Leah said dryly.

“One at a time,” Sue said gently.

Leah went to help Rachel get the spare room, then – Jacob’s old one, ready for Rebecca and Solomon as Sue left with Charlie since she had to work the night shift that night and needed some rest.

“Can I tell you something?” Rachel said uneasily as they opened the blinds and redressed the bed.

“Of course, what’s up?”

“Paul and I… uh…”

“Are you getting cold feet?”

“No!” Rachel said quickly. “I’m really excited – I can’t wait.”

Leah sat on the bed, putting a hand on her growing bump. “Then what is it?”

“We’re trying for a baby,” Rachel admitted, her cheeks flushing.

“What!? Rach, that’s awesome!” A little surprising, sure, but still great. “Since when?”

“We had a pregnancy scare a few months back and I realized I was a little disappointed. Before that we had decided to wait for the wedding, but I figured it would probably take a while, so I came off the pill after that and here we are.”

“Are you pregnant yet?”

She shook her head and frowned, “No, not yet. I got my monthly visitor a few days ago – thankfully it’ll be gone by the wedding, but I was ‘kinda disappointed. I told Paul – but he’s overjoyed at the idea of continuing to try,” she joked.

Leah went over to hug Rachel, but her belly was starting to get in the way of things. “I’m here for you – always.”

“Thanks, Lee,” Rachel said. “It’s been hard keeping it from you. Emily knows, but I didn’t want to tell you until we were sure your pregnancy was… well, smooth.”

“Smooth sailing,” she promised, pulling back. “If you need anything, seriously-“

“I’m just glad you know. It’s been a big secret. I mean, I know it’s not a huge deal, really, but-“

“It is a huge deal,” she admitted. “It’s the biggest, hugest deal. I’m happy for you both. Really.”

The girls hugged again before they heard a new voice – Rebecca’s.

“Dad!” She cried as soon as she entered the house. Her voice mirrored Rachel’s, but was distinctively different, too, for someone who knew the girls well. 

Rachel and Leah emerged from the back bedroom and saw Rebecca, arms wrapped around Billy – with a belly of her own, and Solomon juggling the luggage before Jacob gave him a hand. When they came out, Rebecca pulled away from her dad and immediately grinned. “Well, if it’s not my long, lost twin and the girl who corrupted my baby brother.”

“I think corrupt is an unfair categorization,” Leah said, smirking. 

“I’m not sure, when I saw him last, he barely had chest hair – let alone impending fatherhood,” she teased. The girls hugged, their bellies hilariously in the way, before she hugged Rebecca tightly. “God, I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you, too.”

“Leah,” she introduced herself, extending her hand to Solomon. 

“Solomon,” he returned. “It’s nice to meet you. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

Leah smirked, turning to Rebecca as her and Rachel finally parted. “About corruption?”

He chuckled, “Only a little.”

Leah laughed, and Jacob rolled his eyes. “I think you did corrupt me,” he taunted. 

“I think you like being corrupted,” she tossed back easily.

Rebecca watched their interactions with a grin. “I can’t believe it. My baby brother and best childhood friend are having a baby together. What the Hell!”

“Tell me about it. It’s been… a roller coaster,” Rachel laughed. “A super weird, not-very-fun-at-first roller coaster. With lots of bumps and nausea – literally.”

“How was your flight?” Leah asked, trying to change the topic.

“Fine,” Rebecca said. “A little turbulence, but nothing major. I’m glad I’m not flying 40 weeks pregnant, though, that’s for sure. 28 is enough. How far along are you?”

Rebecca wasn’t wolf-friendly, so Leah had to lie for timing to cover her abnormally close due date. “Almost 25.”

“I still can’t get over it,” Rebecca put her hands-on Leah’s bump. “My little niece or nephew-“

“Nephew,” Jacob said proudly. “We found out earlier.”

Rebecca smiled, “Well I’m sure he’ll get along great with his cousin – his girl cousin. He’ll have to protect her when we visit.”

“A girl!?” Rachel cried.

“Yep, we wanted to tell you in person.”

Billy watched his kids interact with a swelling heart and smiled, “A grandson and granddaughter. I feel so old.”

“You are old,” Rebecca teased, winking at him before growing apprehensive as Billy went to grab some refreshments for them. “It’s weird to be back here.”

Rachel nodded, “I felt the same when I came back.”

It was her first time back since leaving. “Put anymore thought into moving to Hawaii?”

Rachel shook her head, “Nope. Sorry, sis. You’ve got the sunshine and surf to yourself. We’re settling down here after the wedding, but I am going to have a killer honeymoon on the beach.”

“I can’t wait,” she grinned. “It’ll be nice to show you around our home.”

“No plans to move back?” 

“Nah, as much as I miss you guys, Hawaii is our home now. This little one gets to grow up with all the sunshine she can dream of,” Rebecca mused, hand on her belly, rubbing in tiny circles.

“Dad?” Jacob asked later that day when the girls had gone over to Emily’s to tell Emily and Sam about the gender and reconcile with Rebecca.

“Yeah?”

”I have something to ask.”

He sat down across from his dad at the table. “Is everything okay?”

”Everything’s fine - better than fine. I was wondering if maybe I could, well, have mom’s ring?”

Billy hesitated, clearly taken off guard. “Her engagement ring?” Jacob nodded. Billy knew what this meant, he didn’t have to ask. “Are you ready?”

“A baby is a lifetime thing. I love Leah and I want to make her my wife - give her everything she always wanted - be a family. That includes marrying her.”

Billy was a little choked up if he was being honest. Jacob was his youngest – his only boy, and he was hit with the overwhelming realization that his kids were all grown up. He wheeled into his bedroom and came back with a small, black box. “Be careful with it.” It meant a lot. Sarah wanted Jacob to have her ring if anything were to happen - to give it to his wife. 

“I will. I promise.”

”When are you…?”

”I’m not sure yet.”

”Have you asked Sue?”

Jacob shook his head, “Not yet. I wanted to talk to you, first.”

”Well… you have my blessing, of course. The both of you. But ask Sue and Seth, okay? It’ll mean a lot to them both - and Leah, in the absence of Harry.”

Walking down on First Beach the next day, hand in hand, Leah had on a cute sundress that was yellow and orange and flowed out just under her hips with a flowy skirt that ended mid-thigh. It hugged her bump comfortably and she knew Jacob loved it when she showed it off. 

“Rachel can’t wait to start the nursery,” he said softly as they walked, taking in the rare day of sunshine and the sound of the waves crashing on the rocky shore. “I told her when I get it painted, I’ll pick up some stencils from the craft store and she can paint dinosaur footprints and stuff around the room – since you turned down Ninja turtles.”

Leah smiled up at him, “I like that idea.”

Dinosaur was the theme of their nursery because why not? Jacob loved them growing up, they always played in the dirt together, and there were lots of possibilities for decoration - though right now she was still fixated on getting the bare necessities for the baby. Jacob, however, had been sold on Ninja turtles and had been disappointed when not only Leah, but also Emily, Rachel, and Rebecca agreed dinosaurs were cuter.

“Emily also mentioned maybe doing your baby showers together?”

Leah stopped walking and shook her head, “It’s a nice offer, really, but… I think we need our own. I’ve forgiven them, and I love them, but I want this to be about us - and their day to be about them. I’ve lived in their shadow for so long, and I’m happy now and want to explore what that is for myself. Plus, I’m not sure if a baby shower, considering the… supernatural aspect of the pregnancy is really the best idea. Family will ask too many questions.”

Jacob smiled and wrapped his arms loosely around her waist, “I appreciate that. I’ll let Sam know we thoughtfully decline, and we can have something small here with just the supernatural-friendly folk if you want.” He leaned down to press a gentle kiss to her lips - one that started heating up quickly, when another voice brought her back to reality and pulled her away from Jacob.

”Leah!” Meredith called in greeting. Leah turned to face her old friend and smiled - and when she did, Meredith quickly realized the small bump with the way the wind blew the skirt of her dress back. “Oh my god, it’s true.”

”What?”

“That you’re pregnant,” she said happily, a man beside her that Leah knew all too well.

He was a jock from high school. He always made advances on her - even when she was with Sam, and despite her constant rejection he didn’t seem to want to take no for an answer.

”Caleb,” Leah greeted not so enthusiastically before turning her attention back to Meredith. “Yeah, I am. And you and Caleb…”

”Together,” Caleb said, taking Meredith’s hand. “About a year now.”

”Congrats,” Leah said.

”You, too,” Meredith smiled. “And this is…?”

Jacob was younger than them so although they knew of him because of his sisters, they probably hadn’t paid too much attention to him in school and he had changed a lot since they had assumingly last saw him. “This is Jacob. Jacob Black. You remember his sisters, Rachel and Rebecca?”

”Oh my God,” Meredith cried. “Jacob? Last time I saw you… we’ll you’ve sure grown up.”

She sounded like an absent aunt who was just visiting from years abroad. “Yeah,” he said dully, wrapping an arm around Leah’s waist and pulling her close.

”So he’s the man behind the belly?” Meredith giggled nervously.

In what felt like another life, the girls had been friends. She told her everything about her and Sam, they hung out, partnered together in all their classes and even tailored their schedules to match. Emily didn’t go to school with her, so Meredith had been the next best thing. Now? They felt like strangers. She knew Rachel had invited a couple of their old high school friends to the wedding, but never thought to ask if they were actually coming.

Jacob shook Caleb’s hand as Leah nodded in confirmation and Meredith threw her arms around Leah. “I didn’t believe it when I heard you were pregnant - well, honestly, I thought maybe Sam had left that tramp and you guys ended up… you know, having some kind of steamy reconciliation and BAM. Baby.”

Leah pulled back, clearly uncomfortable, but understood the oddness behind Sam’s actions to outsiders. “Nope, Sam and I are friends. He’s still with Emily - married with his own baby on the way, actually. Where did you hear that I was pregnant?” They hadn’t exactly been announcing it to everyone but they hadn’t hidden it, either.

”Caleb and I are in from Utah - that’s where I live now, and he’s been visiting back and forth the past six months. We’re here for the wedding. When I got here, I ran into Audrey and Amber down at the tackle shop - my dad wanted to take us fishing. Their parents own it, so they’ve been working there since grad.” She was rambling, and Leah wished she would just get to the point. “I asked about you, of course. I’ve missed you so much. I really regret losing touch but after the break-up… well, you didn’t really let anyone-”

”Yeah,” Leah cut her off. “So I assume Audrey and Amber know?”

Meredith frowned, and shrugged, “Audrey said that you were… seemingly doing well, but were hanging out with a bunch of guys all the time at the res. They, uh, heard rumors of you getting around with them and then they said they saw you at the hospital with Emily and they told me that Emily was pregnant - and by the looks of it, so were you. They thought it was this weird sister wife thing with Sam. And they said you left town for a while - presumably to cover it up.”

She had taken Emily to an appointment at the hospital while Sam had been on patrol - Kim was sick, so Jared had to bail, and Sam filled in. He hated to miss it, but there were so many appointments now and he didn’t have time to go to them all with the pack and trying to find a part-time job to support them when Emily went off later the summer to have the baby. Leah had been the next best thing to be there with Emily since her sister was busy with her own family. Leah felt sick at Meredith’s words, though. It was no surprise to her for people to assume the worst about her hanging out with the pack - they had for months, but to know people thought she was still sleeping with Sam, and knocked up along with Emily, made her feel nauseous for so many reasons; her pride, dignity, Sam’s concern, and Jacob’s feelings on it, to name a few. 

“Couldn’t be farther from the truth,” Jacob said, turning on the charm - though by his tightened grasp on her hand - which he had taken after Meredith broke his hold on her with her hug, she knew he was annoyed at the idea, too. “Leah and I have been together for a while now and we’re really happy. We both stood in Sam and Emily’s wedding, actually. We’re all very amicable.”

Meredith nodded, looking between the two, but Caleb was the one who spoke. “I guess it’s not too far-fetched though,” he shrugged - and Meredith gave him an unhappy glance. “What? Her and Sam were prom king and queen,” he said, with an heir of jealousy. “No one thought he’d leave her for her cousin - it was weird. Still is. Makes sense for… foul play.”

”Well, there’s not,” Leah snapped, feeling her anger rising. She put a hand on her belly. “The baby is definitely Jacob’s.”

Meredith frowned apologetically. “I didn’t mean to upset you, I just… it’s what I heard. I believe you.” Though it was clear that she didn’t find the stories circulating too absurd before now, but she trusted her old friend to tell her the truth as she always had before. “I’m glad that you’re happy.”

Leah forced a small smile, “You too,” she gestured to her and Caleb. She still wasn’t a fan of him, but she wasn’t the same person from high school, so she wanted to give him the benefit of a doubt, too. “How long are you staying?”

”A few weeks,” Meredith said happily. “Will I see you around before the wedding? A few of us from high school who are still around are going to meet up while I’m here. I’m sure they’d be thrilled to see you! Maybe even squash some of those rumors… Bring Jacob,” she leaned in, whispering in Leah’s ear, but Jacob’s wolf-hearing was unforgiving. “He’s really hot - like… smoking. How do you always end up with the hottest men? Your baby is going to be an absolute smoke-show.” Leah couldn’t help but to grin - partly because she knew Jacob heard it all and because, well, he was hot, and the pregnancy had kind of taken that out of the forefront of her mind. They definitely needed to spend some more one on one time together now that the morning sickness had subsided, and she felt a little more energetic. 

Sam hadn’t been up to his standards now in high school, of course. His muscular build was wolf-acquired, and his short hair was post-phasing, but he had always been attractive - more in a boyish way. When he started phasing, he got a lot more attention from women - but continued to promise her that he didn’t notice it. His newfound build and masculinity had been brushed off to puberty, but Leah had been pleasantly surprised by it. She loved him either way, but his muscles were… well, pretty damn sexy. Jacob’s build was slightly bigger than Sam’s and his height was staggering. He was extremely manly, and Leah was always surprised how she didn’t notice it before she had. Leah was glad Jacob wasn’t able to read her thoughts, now, but he still usually had a good inclination about what was going through the she-wolf’s mind.

”I’ll think about it,” Leah promised in relation to the get together as Meredith pulled back, giving her a ‘sly’ wink. Honestly, she wished for Meredith’s innocence back. Things were so much simpler when all they had to worry about was getting a room alone with their boyfriends at a party. They were always good wing-women for one another and had a lot of fun together, but that was another life ago.

Meredith hugged her again, gave her the details of their scheduled meet up, and then her and Caleb passed them, walking the opposite way. Leah stayed frozen - and clearly unhappy. “What the Hell was that?”

Jacob sighed, not liking the rumor just as much as her considering it was his baby. Though he also felt some pride and cockiness at Meredith’s praise. “Just ignore them-”

”The whole village thinks I’m a slut!”

”Those rumors are old-”

”Not now. I could handle it before - them making assumptions about me hanging with the pack all the time but now I’m carrying Sam’s bastard? People always need something to gossip about.”

“Maybe we can go to the party and put up a united front?”

“Or maybe we need more PDA so these losers know who I’m with.”

”Won’t stop the pregnancy speculations,” Jacob shrugged. “We know the truth, so screw them. She was right about something though,” he mused.

”What?”

“You do have a hot man,” he said playfully.

Leah rolled her eyes but couldn’t help the shadow of a grin that was tugging on the corner of her lips. “That was never in question.” She sighed, “I should probably give Emily and Sam and heads-up.”

Jacob nodded, “We can walk over there, then back home.”

It was the first time he used the term ‘home’ to describe the Clearwater home and she smiled. “Jake?” Leah stopped walking and faced him, wrapping her arms around his neck. There were a few people down on the beach today with the nice weather, and she felt secure having Jacob beside her – solidifying their relationship in public, thanks to Meredith’s words. “I know this has been… pretty crazy since January but I’m so glad that everything happened the way it has.”

He smiled and leaned down to kiss her gently, “Me, too, Clearwater. Me, too.”

He kissed her again and like always, their kissing grew a little too heated for public when she pulled back. “Let’s run by Emily’s for a minute, then home. I’d like to spend some one on one time with the man behind the belly,” she quoted Meredith’s earlier words and laughed, evoking the same sound from his lips.

“I like the sound of that,” he moved his hands from her hips and slid them over her belly fondly before they started walking again and he took her hand. 

They made their way over to Sam and Emily’s and knocked before going in. Emily was making lunch and thoughtfully offered them some, which they nicely declined. Sam was at the table reading the paper - very dad-like but put it down upon their arrival. Jacob and Leah sat at the table by Sam as Emily brought over some freshly baked muffins.

”If you won’t have lunch, at least have a muffin,” she said before returning again with her and Sam’s lunch.

Leah smiled and they both grabbed a muffin - as well as Sam. “We weren’t expecting you - figured you’d be with Rebecca catching up,” Emily said.

“We ran into Meredith down at the beach today,” Leah turned her attention to Sam. “Remember her?”

”Your best friend from school? Of course.”

”She said she was talking to Audrey and Amber - you know, the girls whose parents own-”

”Yeah, I remember.”

”I wanted to swing by and give you both a heads-up. There may be, uh, rumors going around about my pregnancy… And the parentage. Jacob and I told Meredith the truth, though, so hopefully she’ll spread it around.”

”Rumors such as?” Emily asked.

”People may… well, think it’s Sam’s.”

They both looked between Leah and Jacob, clearly lost for words. 

“Yeah, we had the same reaction,” Jacob said dryly. “But they did invite Leah to a party - some people from your class will be there. Thought maybe if we all went together, as some kind of show of solidarity, then we could set the record straight.”

Rumors didn’t bother them, usually, but if they had the opportunity to set this one right, maybe they should. Sam hesitated, turning to Emily. “What do you think?”

She shrugged, “I know Meredith - maybe hanging out with them wouldn’t be a terrible idea.”

”When?”

”Tomorrow night.”

”Alright, we’ll meet you there tomorrow after dinner.”

”We’ll go let you enjoy the sunshine alone,” Leah said, pushing back from the table.

”You don’t have to,” Emily said kindly.

Jacob smirked, “We’ve got our own plans.” A very conspicuous wink to Leah alluded to their ‘plans’ and Leah rolled her eyes and hit his chest playfully - with a grin turning up her lips.

”See you tomorrow.”

Emily laughed, “Have fun. See you then.”

The next evening came quickly. The rain had squashed the groups beach plans – which had been wishful since yesterday had been so nice, but Meredith had invited everyone over to her parent’s place for the night instead. It was pretty roomy - and there wasn’t many of them who had stuck around La Push after high school to begin with. Meredith, Caleb, Amber, Audrey, her, Jacob, Sam, and Emily met up along with a few other old friends in their friend group years ago and Leah was admittedly nervous. Sam didn’t look too comfortable, either, as they congregated in the dining room and kitchen split. Leah and Jacob sat beside each other at the table, along with Sam and Emily as Meredith pulled together some appetizers with Audrey. Amber sat at the island and watched them with Jason, Cheyenne, and Aaron and when Asher, and Anna got there, they sat with Leah and her group at the table.

”I can’t believe you’re pregnant,” Anna gushed. 

It was the recurring theme, apparently. “Yeah, it’s pretty crazy,” Leah returned dryly.

Asher was talking to Sam and Emily - he was a high school friend of his, so the conversation was comfortable, even though it was a little forced. “We’re all growing up!” Anna exclaimed happily. She had just revealed that she was engaged to a guy a few years older than them in town. Leah knew his name but didn’t know him personally. He had to work tonight, so he didn’t attend with her, but Leah was excited for Anna - and glad that although she probably thought the same accusations that Amber and Audrey had, she had happily embraced her fate with Jacob and was proud of their relationship.

The annoying voice in Jacob’s head came back at Anna’s newly engaged reveal to Leah. He had been pretty silent thus far - much like Emily since they were all technically Sam and Leah’s old friends. They had done things so backwards with their relationship that nothing about it was traditional - the least he could do before the baby was born was put a ring on Leah’s finger, right? He wanted to - he loved her and knew she was it for him before the baby had even come into the picture, but the same question repeated in his mind: Did she want that? He still wasn’t sure - they hadn’t brought it up since the cabin. By the wistful look in her face as she studied Anna’s ring, though, the concept of engagement wasn’t entirely lost on the older Clearwater just yet despite her prior unease.

“So, what do you do, Jacob?” Anna asked, clearly not realizing the age-gap.

Leah hesitated, knowing that it was yet another barrier for their relationship to be considered normal with their friends. “Jacob’s in school - but he works on cars at his garage, too.”

”The community college?” Anna asked curiously. 

“High school,” Jacob replied dryly. “Excuse me a minute,” he got up from the table and went out back on the small balcony. The rain was pouring down, but he was covered with the wooden overhang and needed some air.

Anna exchanged an awkward gaze with Leah, “I just assumed-”

”It’s fine,” Leah said, forcing a smile. The table was quiet, now. “He’s Rachel and Rebecca’s brother.” Specifying younger brother felt like a moot point, now. 

”I thought the name sounded familiar - I just didn’t put two and two together.”

”Jacob’s grown up a lot since his mom died,” Emily supplied awkwardly.

Anna nodded, giving both her and Leah a small smile. The four-year age gap wasn’t on her mind coming into tonight but now she realized it was another thing going against them for those who didn’t know the truth of the past year and a half. “So, I’m assuming the baby, wasn’t, uh, planned?” Anna asked.

”We were together for a while before I got pregnant,” Leah said, tight-lipped. “It was a surprise, but a happy one.”

”I’m happy for you both,” Anna said honestly before changing the subject. “How are Rachel and Rebecca?”

”Good. Rebecca just got back for Rachel’s wedding. It’s next week, so they’ve been pretty occupied with that.”

”Hawaii - can you imagine, Meredith? Living in Hawaii as opposed to this place.”

Meredith laughed, “Technically I’m only visiting, but I don’t know why you’d ‘wanna stay here. I mean, between the two days of sun a year and the wind, not the mention the small-town feel. I guess it’s nice if you like that ‘kinda thing but I couldn’t wait to get out.”

Leah shrugged, “I hear ya. Before my dad died, I felt the exact same way-”

“Right, I’m so sorry,” Aubrey chimed in from across the kitchen. “I heard about his death. It must have been really hard.”

Meredith frowned, “I didn’t know he died. What happened?”

”Heart attack,” Sam chimed in. “It was pretty tragic, but Leah’s been managing really well.”

Well, that’s not exactly how she would describe her ‘managing’ situation but she gave him a thankful smile as Jacob came back in and sat beside her, kissing her cheek. “How are you feeling?”

Leah smiled and turned to kiss Jacob on the lips if not just to assure the others they were really happy. “I’m fine. Getting kind of tired, though.”

“No, Lee, you can’t go yet!” Meredith cried. “Stay for a little while longer.”

Leah felt bad considering she barely spoke to Meredith since graduation, so she stayed. The night grew long as the others got happily intoxicated, shared stories from their younger days and caught up. They were all fairing pretty well. Meredith and Caleb went off in the next room after he started getting a little too loud and thankfully, Emily and Jacob started finally feeling like part of the group after a while. 

The music was loud and Leah was laughing at the memory of a high school party they had at Meredith’s in senior year when her parents came home and a guy from their grade threw up all over her dads shoes when Jacob’s ears perked up.

”Leah?” He whispered in her ear. “I think there’s something going on with your friend Meredith.”

”What’s wrong?” She whispered back.

Jacob jumped a little then got up, “I’m going to the restroom, I’ll be right back.” 

Sam’s ears had perked up, too, but he was going to leave this to Jacob. Jacob went down the hall but bypassed the bathroom. He was out of sight from everyone else when he took a deep breath in and opened the door that caught his attention earlier from the noises too quiet for a human’s ear to detect.

When he opened the door, Caleb’s arm was up, just about to hit Meredith across the face - again, if Jacob’s ears and the pink coloring of her cheek were correct. When he opened the door, though, Meredith clutching her cheek, Caleb turned to see who was interrupting them. 

“I’m sorry, I was looking for the bathroom-” Jacob started, playing oblivious until his eyes took in more details. “What’s going on in here?”

Caleb was fuming, “None of your business, go back to your girlfriend. You shouldn’t even be here since there’s drinking - you’re not even legal.”

Meredith cowed under Caleb’s glance as he turned his attention back to her. He grabbed her arm roughly. “Come on, let’s go back out-”

Jacob put his arm across the doorway and looked at Meredith. “Are you okay?”

She nodded meekly, as though if she didn’t defend Caleb, she knew what would happen. “I’m fine,” she lied, her voice thick with emotion, tears glistening in her eyes. 

“You don’t look fine,” Jacob said tightly.

Leah came up behind him then, wondering what was going on, about to ask before she saw the look on Meredith’s face. “What happened?”

Caleb forcefully pushed passed Jacob, and in doing so, knocked Leah and she stumbled back against the wall. Jacob reached out and grabbed his wrist forcefully - probably a little more so than needed considering Caleb’s drunken state. He swayed before facing an angry Jacob. “If you ever touch Leah again,” he threatened before looking at Meredith. “Or ever lay a hand on another woman, I swear to God-”

Leah saw the wolf threatening to emerge and reached out to touch Jacob’s arm to calm him. Jacob could see Leah was fine - he hadn’t shoved her hard enough to do anything but make her step back - the wall aiding in her balance, but it still bothered him what he did to Meredith and how easily he shoved a pregnant woman. “Let him go.”

Jacob hesitated, but he did, and Caleb pushed down the hall and out the front of the house, slamming the door. That caught the others attention, but Leah didn’t care. She turned to Meredith as she started to cry and hugged her tightly, looking at Jacob over her shoulder, curiosity in her eyes.

“I’m sorry. I was looking for the bathroom,” he said again, lying easily. “But I walked in and he was…”

“About to hit me,” Meredith choked out between sobs. “It’s… it’s not the first time. He’s a mean drunk - but usually I can talk him down. I should go do damage control-”

Leah pulled back, “He’s done this before?”

”Only a couple of times and only while drinking,” she defended him lamely.

Leah sighed, knowing all along Caleb wasn’t a great guy but not realizing how terrible he really was. “I’m sorry, but… Mer, you can’t be with someone like that.”

Meredith gave her a weak smile and shook her head, “Seriously… when he’s sober, he’s fine.”

“Drunk or sober – it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t give him the right to lay a hand on you.”

“We’re talking about getting married,” she said, trying to collect herself. “And buying a house – we talk about kids all the time. I love him, Leah. He just… needs to quit drinking.”

Leah didn’t know what to do. She was clearly out of her depth here, but she couldn’t condone this. “Does he want to quit drinking?”

She shrugged, “He promised after the last time he would.”

“It doesn’t look like that’s going too well,” she said dryly.

Jacob excused himself out back with Sam and Emily and the Leah sighed, “I’m here for you, okay?”

“Thanks, Lee,” she said, hugging her friend. “I’ll talk to him when he sobers up. I’ll be fine tonight – Anna’s staying over.”

Leah still felt off about it, but they returned to the others. When the night started getting late, Leah and Emily were both showing signs of exhaustion and Sam smiled as his wife yawned, causing Leah to stifle her own. “Alright, time to get going,” he said gently.

“No, come on, stay a little longer,” the others pleaded.

“Sam’s right,” Jacob said. “Leah and Emily should get home and get some sleep.”

“Pregnancy is exhausting,” Leah agreed.

They all said farewell and Leah told Meredith to call her if she needed her. They exchanged numbers before they all left.

“Well, that was… eventful,” Leah said as they climbed into her mom’s SUV. Sam and Jacob had some beers, so Leah was driving.

Jacob was in the passenger seat and twined his fingers together with hers. “You could say that.”

“At least seeing them at the wedding won’t be as awkward,” Leah supplied as they got on the road.

“Leah, can you pull over?” Emily asked suddenly from the back.

Leah looked in the rear-view mirror and saw alarm on Emily’s face, so she pulled over and Emily got out. She paced around the back of the car for a minute, Sam following her out. When they took a minute, Leah exchanged a panicked look to Jacob and they both got out, too, on the side of the road and walked to the back of the vehicle.

“Are you okay?” Leah asked, seeing Sam hovering beside Emily who had one hand on the car, slightly bent over.

“Fine,” she lied, not wanting Sam to panic. “It’s just Braxton hicks – they’re getting worse and worse and they make me really nauseous.”

Leah felt her own unease rise at the topic. She had a pretty wonderful second trimester thus far. Her energy had increased, the morning sickness had become much more manageable, and she was having fun nesting – not to mention the sex. Emily was into her third, though, and Braxton hicks were a common occurrence. 

Emily took a few more deep breaths in, trying to mask the pain on her face to avoid worrying anyone, but the nausea wouldn’t go away, and she tried to take deep breaths through her mouth. “The smell of the alcohol at the party was making me nauseous, so I guess with the contractions and the moving car, my stomach just isn’t too happy with me.”

“Do you think you’ll be okay to get home?”

She stood upright now, but she felt her stomach struggle to behave. “I just need a few minutes.”

“We’ll be in the car,” Leah offered, wanting to give them some privacy.

“I guess you have that to look forward to,” Jacob commented as they got back in the SUV.

“Don’t remind me,” Leah groaned, looking down at her belly. “This stage of pregnancy is kind of fun. Plus, my belly is a good size. 9 months pregnant and getting ready to push something the size of a watermelon out of the size of a grape? Scary.”

“Carlisle will make sure everything goes smoothly,” Jacob promised.

He squeezed her hand reassuringly as Sam and Emily got back in the car and Leah started home. She had to stop once more for Emily, but they got them home safe and sound and then headed back to the house.

“I’m kind of scared,” Leah admitted as they went inside. “Giving birth seems... well, terrifying, after all.”

“I’ll be there, right by your side, the entire time. You can squeeze my hand as hard as you want – my wolf healing will fix me right up after anyways.”

She laughed and saw Abigail and Seth curled up on the couch when she walked in. She was glad they had seemingly made amends. “Hey,” Leah called in greeting, seeing Embry and Quil come into view, as well. They were both with a girl of their own – one of the girls was the one who had been with Quil in the basement the night of Seth’s party.

“Hey, Lee,” Embry called. “Jake. How was the party?”

“Alright,” Leah said, hoping Caleb wouldn’t cause anymore trouble. “How’s things here?”

“Fine,” Seth replied. “You’ve met Jasmine,” he said, gesturing to Quil’s female counterpart. “And that’s Casey,” he referred to the girl by Embry.

“Nice to meet you,” Leah said friendly as they both said hello. “Are you guys…?”

“Dating,” Embry said happily, pulling Casey toward him and kissing her hair. 

“Congrats,” Jacob said – knowing this already from the pack bond, but not having met the women yet – or told Leah. After all, they kind of had a lot going on lately.

“We’re ‘gonna go upstairs,” Jacob said. “Leah’s pretty tired.”

“No funny business,” Quil teased as Seth groaned.

Leah rolled her eyes, “No promises – you’re in our house now.”

They laughed and Leah went upstairs, sitting on her bed. “Tonight wasn’t terrible… minus the whole Caleb thing.”

“Despite your friends thinking I’m an infant?”

Leah smirked as he took his shirt off – evoking less than innocent emotions to swell in her chest at the sight of his sculpted, bare chest. “If they saw that,” she said, getting to stand before him, putting her hands on his chest, letting her fingertips gently move on his abdomen. “They wouldn’t think infant – unless you count the dirty fantasizes you evoke at the thought of making a baby,” she said sexily. 

Jacob laughed and pulled her as close as he could with her growing belly, kissing her passionately. “I think I like our friends better.”

It was strange to think of her as friendly with the pack now. She wasn’t sure when it happened, but they all had managed to finally accept her into their ranks – just when she was finally phasing out, but nonetheless it felt nice to feel them rally behind her and Jacob especially with the impending pregnancy. Even Paul and her were friendly now which was a testament to both of their growth. “Agreed. They’re really not my friends anymore, anyways. Different time, different life.”

“So a boy,” Jacob said, grinning ear to ear as Leah rolled her eyes at his enthusiasm and grabbed her pajama camisole and shorts for bed. 

“Would you be this elated if it had been a girl?”

“Of course,” he said seriously. “But it’s a boy. Which means throwing the football around the yard instead of doing a girl’s hair – which although I have two sisters, I absolutely cannot do. Rachel tried to teach me to braid her hair when I was a kid – luckily mom managed to get all of the knots out before I got to the scissors.”

Leah laughed, picturing Jacob as a child, playing with his sister’s hair. Then, her image shifted to picture their baby playing with her hair. A bundle of blue in her arms, her hair wrapped around his tiny little fingers.

“What’s wrong?” Jacob asked as she grew pensive, slipping into her pajamas before coming over to sit next to him – him already in his boxers. 

“Nothing, just picturing our little guy. Tanned skin, black hair, brown eyes.”

“As beautiful as his mother and as deadly as his father,” Jacob smirked, reaching up to rest his hand against her cheek.

Leah ignored his jab at his masculinity over hers and rolled her eyes, “You mean as handsome as his father and as strong-willed as his mother?”

“I said what I said.”

“He’ll be perfect no matter what,” Leah said, resting her hand on her belly. “Though, you forgot one important thing about having a boy.”

“What’s that?”

“You’ll have to teach him how to fish – something we already determined isn’t your strong-suit. I guess we could always get Seth to teach him – or me, but it seems like a male bonding activity suited for a father-son.”

Jacob laughed a deep, full-belly laugh. “I got the fishing thing down, don’t worry, I wouldn’t want to disappoint Harry. My stomach will be fine. We have a wolf-chief in the making, avid fisherman, and heart-stealer.”

“Let’s get him out of my belly first before we start planning his future.”

“I never thought I’d be so excited to be a dad – especially not at seventeen in my infancy,” he teased.

“They’ve lived a different life,” she said, referring back to her friends. “Parties and college. Sometimes I was jealous of my friends from school who got to leave this place and find themselves, but I’m glad I never because I think La Push is what I never knew I needed until now.”

“You mean Jacob Black was just what you need, right?”

“I mean La Push,” she teased.

“Whatever, Lee. You’ve got a thing for the La Push boys – especially the manly Alpha’s like myself.”

“I don’t know, have you stopped sucking your thumb yet?”

“I assure you, my mouth has better things to do.”

They managed to get sneakily creative under the sheets before they both fell asleep.


	21. I due

Leah was just getting ready to leave to go over to Rachel’s – the guys going over to Paul’s parent’s house to get ready and leaving Billy’s for the girls, when Jacob snagged her arm.

It was the day Rachel Black was going to become Rachel Lahote. Leah felt much different this morning, getting ready to go over to Billy’s to get dressed and ready with the girls, than she had preparing for Emily’s wedding months prior. This time, minus the formality of wedding’s always being a little boring, she was excited. Now, she had seemingly found her own happily ever after – one that ensured she wouldn’t be sobbing against the groom at the end of the night and push her toward seeking comfort in the arms of a not so suitable (at the time) rebound.

“Have you decided?” Jacob asked, turning her toward her as he snaked his arms around her waist. 

“Decided what?”

“What I asked you at the cabin.”

Leah was drawing a blank. The pregnancy took up a lot of her time and energy, so she wasn’t exactly time-stamping things in her mind. “The cabin?”

Jacob sighed, “I’m disappointed in you, Clearwater.”

“Just spit it out, Jake.”

“If you wanted to get married.”

Leah clued in then and frowned, “This again?”

“What do you mean, this again? I only asked you once. I thought you’d be happy to consider yourself in Rachel’s shoes someday.”

“Minus the fact that her shoes are six-inches tall heels,” she mused.

He rolled his eyes playfully, “You could be Leah Black someday, you know. If that’s something you want…”

It was ironic; Rachel was giving the Black name away, and here Jacob was, basically asking her if she wanted it. It still brought up conflicting feelings in the older Clearwater. Without her dad, it felt wrong, and the imprint would always scare her, but she did know Jacob would be an amazing husband. He had already proven to be a good father-to-be. What was a piece of paper when she was sustaining the life of their unborn child - a commitment for the rest of their lives regardless of a ring or not? “Yesterday you threatened Seth that if he ate the last ice cream sandwich you were going to pulverize him and today, you’re proposing marriage?”

He smirked, “That was mine. He had his fair share; he ate practically the entire box!”

Leah laughed despite herself but grew pensive. “I don’t want you to feel like we need to get married just because I’m pregnant.”

“And I told you already that the baby has nothing to do with it – except maybe speeding up the inevitable. But it was that – inevitable. Once we decided to be together, I knew you were it for me, Lee. I could never meet a more infuriating, challenging, and beautiful woman if I tried,” he teased. “You and the baby are my future – if that’s what you want.” 

His words, admittedly, made her heart clench and beat a little faster in her chest and she felt her face growing warm with emotion. “Jake…”

“I’m not asking right now,” he promised. “But I want to know if the thought of marriage is something you’ve decided on or not.” Having his mother’s ring was weighing on him but he still wanted to make sure she wanted it before popping the question.

She hesitated. This was what she wanted her entire life – the father of her child asking her if she wanted to be married (not necessarily in that order, but what was already done was out of their control). She never thought she would have any qualms or hesitations when the time came, but now that it had, she wasn’t 100% sure if she wanted it anymore. Okay, maybe that wasn’t entirely true. She wanted it – she loved Jacob and the idea of being his wife felt surreal, but it was happening so differently from what she originally pictured that she was having a hard time reconciling her vision to their reality. “I don’t know,” she whispered honestly, avoiding his gaze. “It has nothing to do with you, or us-“

“Your dad,” he finished for her. 

“It doesn’t feel right without him.”

He reached down and put a finger under her chin, tilting her face up to meet his gaze. “I’m not pressuring you into anything, I promise. I want you to want to get married – to me, preferably,” he smirked before turning serious again. “But I don’t think basing that decision on your dad not being here is… well, justified. Harry would want you to be happy, Leah.”

“And I want him to be here to see that-“

“I wish I could do something to bring him back, I’d do anything to be able to, but as much as it hurts, he isn’t here and you can’t tailor your life around what you thought it would be back from your teens. A lot has changed.”

“You think I don’t know that?” She asked, feeling her temper rising. “I’m trying – this whole thing, the baby and the imprint… None of those things happened the way I wanted them to and now I have to try to come to terms with letting go of the wedding I pictured since I was a little girl.”

“You don’t have to let it go. I know you always wanted to get married in your backyard and-“ 

“And have my dad walk me down the aisle.”

He frowned and met her gaze, seeing tears in her eyes and not wanting to be the reason she started today out on the wrong foot. “I know you want that but there’s nothing I can do or say to make that happen and I’m so sorry, but does that mean you’re never going to let yourself get married? Ever?”

His words reminded her of Embry back at Sam and Emily’s wedding when he was interrogating her about allowing Sam to ruin her life forever and it hit home. She blinked back the tears that she hadn’t wanted to form and ran her tongue over her lip. She had let other people dictate her life for so long and she needed to adapt her vision to the now, but it was still hard letting go. Jacob mistook her silence for agitation, though, and dropped his hands from her hips. “I don’t want to cause a fight – honestly. I just think you’ll regret it if you let what could have been dictate you moving forward now.”

“Why do you even want to marry me?”

Jacob looked at her and quirked a brow in confusion. “Because I’m in love with you - have I not made that obscenely clear?”

Her face softened and she sighed, sitting on her bed, “I’m sorry…”

“Don’t be,” he said, going over to stand in front of her and pull her against his chest. “I know Harry is a touchy subject – I shouldn’t have brought it up today.”

“No, you’re right,” Leah said, leaning back to look up into his eyes. “I think my dad would still want me to get married – and I do want to, I just think it’ll be a rough day without him.”

“Maybe it’ll have some rough moments,” Jacob agreed. “But I think it would still be pretty special.”

She smiled up at him gingerly, then checked the clock. “I ‘gotta get going. Rachel’s going to freak out if we’re not at the beach on time.”

Thankfully, the rain was staying away. Rachel’s dream of a beach wedding was coming true – even if most people pictured it with sunny skies and sand - not clouds and rocks. Jacob helped her up off the bed and kissed her, handing her a bag that she had ready to go and draping her dress bag over her arm. “I’ll drop you off on the way to Paul’s.”

They called out to Seth, Jacob grabbed his tux, and they all piled into the car. Once they got to Billy’s, he leaned over and kissed Leah before she got out. “See you at the aisle, Clearwater,” he winked teasingly, both recreating their time together from Sam’s wedding and teasing her about the nuptials that may one day come for them. She rolled her eyes teasingly in response before joining the girls inside.

Despite having to forgo the mimosa’s while getting ready, Leah had a blast with the girls. They laughed, caught up, got dressed, did each others hair and make-up, and Leah was once again reminded that without a broken heart, Emily’s wedding could have been this fun, too. She assumed Emily’s thoughts mirrored hers because she would sometimes give her a reassuring smile – as though she forgave her without Leah even having to mention it. Emily’s heart was big, and Leah was glad they were in a good place.

When Leah finished getting ready, dressed in her gown, hair done loosely in waves and basic make-up she slipped into the bathroom. Her dress was a wrap gown and she couldn’t help but to admire her chest when she had it half-done up earlier. Before tying the sash around, a large amount of cleavage showed, and she had to admire the even fuller chest that pregnancy had given her. Which also made her think Jacob would, too. Skillfully, she untied the sash and let the dress fall to the side a little, exposing her rather robust chest. She took a picture that showed just enough to feel provocative yet still covered everything in the dress’s undercover. She quickly redid the sash, made sure nothing was out of place, and joined the other girls with a pleased grin – after hitting ‘send’ to Jacob.

Once they were all finally ready – Billy’s protests that they had to hurry up heard loud and clear, they finally went to the beach. There was a white archway with vines and white carnations woven through the lattice design at the end of a makeshift aisle which consisted of only a red runner and white fold-up chairs with sashes on each side of the aisle, but it was perfect. The ceremony was happening on the small grass patch before the beach started since the rocks made it kind of difficult in heels and for Billy’s wheelchair, but they had all brought sneakers, too, for stepping on the rocks if needed – Rachel’s were sparkly white Keds.

Jacob had helped out a lot, and Leah thought it looked exactly like Rachel kept picturing it. When the girls got there, everyone was already there. Paul was standing at the end of the aisle beside the officiant, visibly sweating despite the rather mild temperature – Sam to his side, followed by Jacob, and then Jared. Once the girls got there, music started, and the guests rose. 

It was a small wedding – much smaller than Emily and Sam’s. Mostly just their close-knit group and Rachel’s close extended family. Leah knew them all from growing up with Billy’s kids, and it was nice to see the small, intimate ceremony in contrast to Emily’s bigger one. Both were beautiful, but this one felt more sentimental. Maybe that was, again, just because she was in a much better head space this time around. There were a few guests she didn’t recognize but assumed they were Rachel’s college friends and some of their high school friends sat around together in the back. Thankfully, Rebecca had met Embry the night before and no imprint happened – to all of their relief. It had been the reigning ‘joke’ beforehand.

Rebecca started to walk down the beach from the parking lot first, then Leah – who caught Jacob’s eye that told her he definitely did get the picture earlier, then Kim, then Emily. Emily was an ‘extra’ bridesmaid in comparison to groomsmen, but Rachel didn’t care about the odd number and Emily was going to ‘exit’ down the aisle with her niece, Claire – the flower girl. The ring bearer was going to ‘exit’ on his own and was one of Paul’s cousins that Leah didn’t recognize. She had everything memorized since Rachel harped on them all to get it right for the last twenty-four hours.

The girls walked alone, unlike at Emily’s wedding and when they got to the front, took their spots on the side. The traditional ‘Here Comes the Bride’ started playing and Rachel started walking down, Billy beside her, arms linked. Leah felt herself fill up and she felt justified letting the tears slip down her cheeks this time around since she wasn’t pining after the groom. 

Rachel didn’t have her mom there, which Leah knew pained her, but the way she shone like the sun – which was still absent in the sky, made her look so radiantly beautiful and happy. Billy’s face was hard, as though he was trying to keep his emotions in check and Leah reached up to dry her cheeks, just as she heard Rebecca and Emily do the same. How did Rachel end up with most of her bridal party knocked up? They were going to need a lot of tissues.

Finally, Billy and Rachel reached the ‘alter’ and Paul stepped forward. “Take care of my little girl,” Billy said, his voice choked up.

Paul gave him a curt nod – his face more serious than Leah had ever seen it before, and reached out to shake Billy’s hand as he cleared his throat. “I will, I promise.”

Billy nodded, shook his hand, and then Jacob stepped forward and wheeled Billy back beside the front row before taking his position between Sam and Jared again.

“We’re all here today to witness the union between Paul Lahote and Rachel Black.”

The ceremony was pretty typical – much like Sam and Emily’s, although Leah’s chest wasn’t cleaning in pain with every word. Finally, the vows came, and Leah was grateful for the short ceremony because her feet were killing her having to carry the extra weight of her belly and not having them broke in. Thankfully, they were only a small kitten heel but her feet still ached.

The vows were traditional – Rachel was too nervous to write her own, and Paul was grateful to repeat after the officiant and not have the added pressure of perfection, creativity, and memorization added onto today.

Finally, they got to the part everyone was waiting for.

“Rachel Black, do you take Paul Lahote, from this day forward, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, in holy matrimony, for the rest of your life?”

“I do,” Rachel’s voice was muffled by a sniffle and she reached up to wipe her eyes dry.

“Paul Lahote, do you take Rachel Black, from this day forward, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, in holy matrimony, for the rest of your life?” 

“I do,” Paul’s voice cracked, and Leah smiled – it was nice to see him so serious and committed to something and not joking around constantly. He had really manned up since meeting Rachel – and they had even put their feud to bed permanently since she had gotten pregnant. Admittedly, he had been a comforting force to be around since the news of the baby came out. She trusted him – which is something she never thought she would say. They still butted heads sometimes, but it was much more playful and less murderous than before.

“I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride.”

Paul wrapped his arms around Rachel, picking her up, her arms around his neck, and kissed her feverishly as everyone cheered. Now there was another married woman in their group – Kim probably next as she assumed Jared was probably just waiting until Paul’s wedding was over to ask her. Age aside, they all knew it was coming sooner rather than later with the other imprints growing serious.

“I give you, for the first time as man and wife, Mr. and Mrs. Paul Lahote.”

Rachel and Paul ran happily back down the aisle, over to a smaller area they had for the dancefloor and everyone left to congratulate the happy couple. It was a day full of happiness, truly, and as they all met up for pictures, Jacob found Leah and kissed her passionately. “Much different atmosphere than the last one of these we were at, huh?” He asked playfully.

Leah rolled her eyes, but it was nice to be in love again – and completely and utterly happy. “Definitely different.”

“Especially in one way.”

“What’s that?”

“I didn’t get to see you half-naked before their wedding,” he taunted, referring to the picture. “Are you tying to kill me, woman?”

She grinned, and he kissed her before she had a chance to respond - unable to keep his hands off her. “Thought you’d enjoy the view is all,” she murmured against his lips. 

The wedding pictures didn’t take too long, and everyone lingered together. Sue found them not too long after and smiled, “They’re a wonderful couple, huh?”

“Definitely,” Leah agreed as Seth and Abigail came up behind them – having long made up and figured out how important communication was to avoid anymore awkward encounters. Abigail had also apologized to Leah profusely about the party, which Leah assured her was fine – as long as it was a one-time thing. There would be no more parties in the Clearwater household once the baby was born, though – at least not for a while.

“Leah!” Claire ran up to the older Clearwater. She hadn’t seen her since the last wedding and Leah smiled as she hugged her. She was getting taller by the day but was still only going to be four in a few months. 

“Hey Claire Bear,” she engulfed the child effortlessly. “Mommy said you and Aunt Emily are going to have babies together.”

In efforts of trying to avoid anymore sister-wife ideologies, Leah pulled back and smirked. “We’re having them the same time, or well, pretty close together, yeah.”

“Can I meet it?”

“Him,” Leah said, grinning. “And of course. Once he’s out of my tummy, you can come over and spend the weekend, okay?”

Jacob watched Leah with adoration as she talked to Claire. How did he get so lucky? Leah’s softer side was a force to be reckoned with. Although he had seen her interact with Claire many times before, it held a different feel knowing she would be the mother to his son soon – and because if he was being honest, Leah used to regard Claire with a wistfulness of a child she didn’t think she would one day have and it had caused her to keep her distance to avoid the heartache. He wasn’t sure how, but watching her, he went from extremely turned on by the she-wolf moments ago to wanting to protect her gentleness.

“Yay!” Claire exclaimed as Sue laughed and Seth and Abigail went for some pictures. “Can I be a flower girl at your wedding, too?”

The question took Leah by surprise, but she just laughed, “If I get married, the title’s yours,” she promised.

Claire gave her one more hug and then left. Her words were too close to the truth, and Jacob hesitated before kissing Leah’s cheek. Sue had just turned to go speak with one of his aunts, but Jacob excused himself from Leah and got to her before she got too far. “Sue?”

She turned around and smiled, “Yes, Jacob?”

“I, uh…” Now that he was here, he completely understood Paul’s humble attitude months back when he asked for permission. Shit. He reached up to rub the back of his neck, which had sweat accumulating on it from the suit’s warmth. “I have something to ask you.” Sue nodded, as though waiting for Jacob to continue and he gulped back the growing lump in his throat. He turned to make sure Leah wasn’t looking, but she was off getting pictures with the girls, now, farther down the beach. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small, black box. He handed it to Sue, and she looked down, opening it curiously. 

“Are you proposing to me, or my daughter?” She asked, recognizing the familiar ring Sarah used to wear. Her humor was to hide the stirring emotions in her chest realizing the implications. She quickly shut the box and handed it back to Jacob.

“No! I mean – Leah, obviously…” 

A grin adorned the older women’s lips. “You don’t have to ask my permission, Jacob. Though I do appreciate the gesture.”

“I just want to make sure you’re… well, okay, with this?”

“You’re already having a baby together,” Sue reached out and took his hands between hers. “She’ll be thrilled. You have my permission. If my daughter wants to marry you, I won’t stand in her way. You’ve always been a part of our family.”

Jacob breathed a sigh of relief, “Thank you. I’m going to ask Seth, too.”

Sue hugged Jacob in response. When he pulled back, he was about to go find the younger Clearwater before Leah realized what he was doing, but Sue caught his attention. “You would have had Harry’s permission, too.”

The words caught Jacob by surprise, and honestly made him emotional. He gave Sue a half-smile, knowing how difficult it must be for her to talk about him in this context. “That means everything. I know his – and your, approval means everything to Leah, and it does to me, too.”

“I have a letter for her,” Sue said, her voice choking up. “When Harry first started having heart issues, he and I knew it was only a matter of time. We kept the severity from Leah and Seth because we wanted them to enjoy whatever time Harry had left. Admittedly, neither of us thought it would happen quite as quickly as it had…” She trailed off in thought.

Jacob actually remembered not long before Harry’s passing when they had dinner at Billy’s together with Bella about Sue was teasing him about eating better – and Harry brushing it off with a joke. “A letter?” 

She nodded, “Once he started having heart problems, he wrote a letter to Leah to read on her wedding day – and one to her future husband. He also wrote a couple for Seth. I told him he would be around and told him he didn’t need to, but he insisted. I have them home in my night table, but I haven’t read them. I know moving forward in life without him is difficult for both of my kids – it is for me, too, but I think once Leah reads the letter on her wedding day… well, I think she’ll realize he’s always with her even though he isn’t physically here. He loved his kids more than anything in this world.” Sue smiled sadly and Jacob cleared his throat as a lump began to form. 

“He was a good man,” Jacob said finally. “I hope I can look after Leah and our son the way Harry and my dad looked after us.”

“You will,” she said, taking his hand and squeezing it. “I have a good feeling about you two.”

“Thanks, Sue.”

Sue left then to find Charlie who was by the refreshment table nursing a beer. Jacob took the words in for a minute, looking up at the sky, believing if there was some sort of Heaven, Harry was there, and he was watching him now. “I’ll take good care of her,” he said, remembering Paul’s words from earlier. “Forever; I promise.”

He took another deep breath before turning to find Seth and came face to face with Embry. “Are you talking to yourself now? I know being Alpha and a dad soon and everything is… well, overwhelming, but I didn’t think you’d go crazy.”

Jacob rolled his eyes, “Where’s Seth?”

Embry nodded behind him, “Over there with Abigail and Claire.”

“Thanks.”

“Why? What’s up?”

“Nothing,” Jacob called as he went toward the direction of the threesome. “Hey, Seth, can I have a sec?”

Seth excused himself, leaving Abigail to fend off Claire’s adorableness herself. “What’s up?”

Jacob found his nerves grow exponentially again despite Sue’s blessing and he once again, made sure Leah wasn’t around before handing Seth the box. He opened it just as carefully and curiously as Sue had.

“I love your sister and I want to marry her – but I need your blessing.”

Seth looked up to Jacob, his face unreadable, and was quiet for a moment before his eyes returned to the ring, then closed the box. “You’re proposing today?”

Jacob shifted on his feet. “If you’re okay with it. I spoke to your mom already.”

Seth nodded, passing him back the box. “At Rachel’s wedding?”

“It was her idea,” he admitted lamely. “And I’m going to do it in private.”

Seth shook his head, clearly taken off guard. “Jake… you’ve always been a brother to me. Having you as an official brother would be great – and I’m not going to attempt to even try and speak for my sister, but I know how happy you are together. You have my blessing, but she’s also my sister, remember that. She’s my blood and if you hurt her-“

“I won’t,” he grinned foolishly. 

“She’s coming,” Seth said, his eyes turning to the approaching figure behind them. Jacob shoved his hand into his pocket, depositing the ring back, and thanked Seth before he turned to his beautiful girlfriend. 

“How do you make a bridesmaid dress look so alluring? I thought these things were supposed to be ugly,” he teased.

Leah took his hand and rolled her eyes, “That suit looks good, too. Better on my floor, though.”

“On the garage floor,” Jacob teased again just as his phone dinged in his pocket.

He looked down and saw another image coming through – this time, of Leah, on her bed, fingers trailing down… oh, God. “Leah,” he scolded her, snapping his phone closed quickly as the image burned into his brain. He closed his eyes, taking a deep breath as his hand tightened in hers. 

“Something wrong?” she taunted.

“Only my girlfriend sending me half naked pictures at a time when I can’t remove her current clothing,” he grumbled, causing her smirk to grow. 

“I thought it may be a nice warm up for later.”

“I’m not sure we’ll get to later if you keep this up.”

“Rachel probably wouldn’t notice us missing.”

“She would,” he said dryly, daring to look down into her deep brown pools. “That picture wasn’t taken recently.” Her belly had been perfectly chiseled and flat – much different than now, although he loved them both.

“I took it with the intention to send it to you before Jeremy and I happened and then I forgot about it.”

“How do you forget about that?”

“I’m hoping you won’t,” she taunted. 

“There’s no worry about that. How much longer do you think the wedding pictures will take? We could always…” But just then, Sam called for Jacob’s attendance for the family photos and he sighed. 

“Later,” Leah whispered as he kissed her quickly.  
It wasn’t long before the beach was set up for the reception - with food and music. Oh, and lots of alcohol, but it was off-limits for pregnancy, so Leah sipped a tonic water, forgoing the tequila. They had string lights set up along tiki torches and now that it was getting dark, it seemed to make a great atmosphere for a makeshift dance floor with the soft lighting. Thankfully, it was extremely mild for June and although Leah could feel the dampness in the air which would no doubt call for some late-night drizzle, everyone was having a good time. 

Sam had done a classy best man speech, throwing in some humor and Rebecca followed up with a heartfelt speech that made everyone’s eyes damp – especially Rachel’s and then, food and music ensued. Unfortunately for pregnancy, spinning didn't really sit well with her, though she did think back to Sam and Emily's wedding as she watched as Rachel and Paul had their first dance, followed by Rachel and Billy and Paul and his mom – which she was only slightly envious of. It seemed like a lifetime ago, now, that her and Jacob got way too drunk and ended up in bed together for the first time after that wedding, but she was glad she could think back on that day with fond memories now.

Jacob got up and went up to the podium as Paul and his mom’s dance came to an end before the floor was opened up to everyone and Leah raised a brow as everyone’s attention turned to Jacob. “I know everyone’s eager to get dancing and drinking, but I want to thank everyone for coming today again, on behalf of my father, our sister Rebecca, and myself, as well as the beautiful bride that I’m proud to call my sister – most of the time, anyways,” he teased, evoking laughter from the guests. Leah rolled her eyes, but smirked. “And I’m especially grateful to have Paul as a brother – though we’ve always been unofficial brothers. Congratulations and I wish you both a lifetime of happiness together.”

Leah thought the speeches were over – but apparently Jacob had to one-up Sam. Again.

Rachel didn’t look too surprised, though, as she and Paul went to hug him. “Thanks, Jake, but just remember who the older and wiser sibling is,” she mused, taking over the mic. “I really do want to thank everyone for being here today, Paul and I are very excited you could take the time to celebrate today with us. I also want to thank my brother, although younger,” she jabbed. “He has been such an instrumental part of my and my father’s life since our family lost our mother.” She felt sadness overcome her at the mention of her late mother, and she gulped back the lump growing in her throat. “My mom would have given anything to be here today, and I know in some way, she is here. Thankfully, I’ve had the best support system with my incredible father, my brother, and my twin sister. I’m forever grateful for them and extremely glad my sister could be here from Hawaii to celebrate. Thank you all for coming and I’ll see you on the dancefloor.”

A fast song started playing – Footloose, and the dance floor filled up as Paul kissed Rachel feverishly - which surely, despite their new marital status, surely made Billy uncomfortable. Jacob approached her after speaking to his sister and Paul off-mic and Billy went up to join his kids – along with Rebecca. They all had a family moment and Leah smiled at the love palpating between them all.

It wasn’t until the music shifted to something slow that they all parted and Jacob went to her side.

“Ms. Clearwater, will you dance with me?” Jacob extended his hand to her and Leah smiled. 

Leah rolled her eyes playfully and Jacob’s hands reached down to pull her close, resting on the small of their back. Her tight bridesmaid dress didn’t allow for her to hide her growing bump, and it nudged against Jacob’s belly as he pulled her into him. Leah reached up to wrap her arms around his neck as some new country song gently played in the background.

They were surrounded by others on the floor and it reminded her of their time dancing together at Sam and Emily’s wedding when less than conservative thoughts had shockingly entered her mind. She wondered now if it was her or her wolf that had started their attraction, but she would never know for sure and had to admit, whichever it was had surely got it right. Jacob’s voice broke her from her thoughts.

“Remember our first dance?”

“How can I forget? You practically dragged me onto the dance floor.”

“I haven’t forgotten your initial urge to ditch me,” he teased. “Who knows, if you had escaped out that fire exit maybe the garage never would have known true passion.”

“And you still wouldn’t know how to take a bra off,” she said, causing him to laugh.

“I think you need a new joke now that I’ve mastered bra-removal and Leah satisfaction.”

“Leah satisfaction?”

“I don’t hear you complaining.”

Leah felt her cheeks flushing, and Jacob reached up to touch Leah’s chin and tilt it up. She smiled against his lips but kissed him back effortlessly as Jared intentionally jostled Jacob’s shoulder. 

“Get a room,” he teased.

Jacob chuckled and gently nudged Jared back as he danced with Kim. “That’s the plan when this thing is over.”

They stayed like that until the song started fading out – before Rachel grabbed her to hang with the girls. As the night progressed with more dancing, laughter, and memories, Leah was growing tired – pregnancy took a lot out of you. She had also sent a couple more pictures to Jacob from across the beach – which got her extremely heated and disapproving looks considering he was wrapped up in taking to his family members and with the guys for the majority of the night. Finally having enough, she went up behind Jacob and put a hand on his shoulder as he spoke to Sam and Jared. “Hey, I’m going to go home – I’m exhausted and it’s almost midnight. You stay out and have some fun.” Even with her approval, though, she knew he wasn’t about to let her go home alone after all day of taunting him.

Jacob hesitated, not realizing how late it had been with his nerves amplifying as the night ticked on and having pacified family members for the majority night - the unofficial duty of the bride’s brother, apparently. That and he had heeded a lot of questions about his own romantic affairs with Leah – and the unexpected pregnancy. He checked his watch and nodded to Sam and Jared – in thanks, before turning to Leah. “No, I’ll come, too. I have a pit stop to make on the way home, though. Let’s say goodbye to Rachel and Paul.”

He took her hand and began leading her through the crowd of people still talking, laughing, and dancing, until they found the beautiful bride. “You guys leaving already?” Rachel pouted. “I haven’t even gotten a chance to throw the bouquet.”

“I’m sure Kim will fight for it,” Leah teased.

Rachel hugged them both, followed by Paul, and he whispered something to Jacob as Rachel held out the throw bouquet to her. “Here, I think you deserve to be next.”

There was a strange note to her voice, and Leah shook her head, “No way, you have to throw it.”

Rachel tossed it toward Leah who caught it on instinct. They were white peonies and rose, after all, and wouldn’t do well sitting on the damp ground. “See? You’re next, Clearwater.”

Leah rolled her eyes at the gesture, and Jacob’s face was hard, making her raise a brow. “Thanks, Rach. Have a good first night as man and wife,” Leah winked before Jacob groaned.

“Will do,” Paul teased, kissing Rachel passionately.

They both left and walked together, hand in hand, toward the Clearwater’s. Jacob had a few beers to calm his raging nerves and Leah said they could walk home despite Sam’s request to drive them.

“Like old times, huh?” Jacob mused. 

“Except I’m pregnant, not drunk,” she returned easily.

“And now when we have sex I don’t think you’re going to kill me afterwards.”

“What did you really think the morning after?”

They walked under the moonlight, grateful for the overcast sky keeping the rain away. “When I woke up and still smelled your perfume on my skin and remembered everything, I thought it was going to be bad – especially since I figured you were going to make this big deal over it being a huge mistake and you were still in love with Sam and were probably going to hate me for taking advantage of you.”

Leah thought about his words for a moment before responding, “Admittedly, I felt more liberated from Sam than remorseful. And you didn’t take advantage of me.”

“I know that, but you’re kind of unreasonable sometimes,” he teased, evoking an eyeroll. “What did you think? You left pretty quickly after.”

“I had just screwed my Alpha after sobbing against my ex. I didn’t really want to stick around and deal with the aftermath.”

A grin played on his lips, unable to hide his amusement. “Well, lucky we figured out the friends with benefits thing pretty quickly, huh?”

“I think we failed at that,” she gestured to her growing bump.

“Best failure ever.”

Leah stopped walking and reached up to pull him close, kissing him feverishly on the sidewalk under a lamp post. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” he returned before kissing her again, their bodies responding appropriately before he forced himself to pull back. “Come on, I’ve got a surprise.”

They kept walking, Leah’s mind curious about what he had tucked up his sleeve now as they approached his house – and stopped.

“What’s this all about, I mean, I know you’re all about grand gestures, but we know how well they usually don’t go for you,” she teased. Jacob was one of the most romantic people she knew but she never thought it would ever be directed toward her.

Jacob smiled, “Hopefully this one will go better.” He gently veered her to the garage and unlocked it with a key – considering he had been working in there a lot lately he needed a little extra security.

“Jake, seriously? The garage?”

“What, I thought we were going down memory lane? ‘Gotta visit where it started. I thought about getting ice cream but figured the wedding cake was enough sugar for the little guy and didn’t want to send him into a frenzy,” he teased, placing a hand briefly on her belly.

Jacob led her into the garage, and her eyes took in the sight of small, white lights hanging from the ceiling, a clean white sheet covering the concrete floor that was covered in white and red rose petals, and it was clean – so clean you never would have imagined Jacob was working in there as much as possible the past month. Leah walked in, gazing around, and Jacob hovered behind her expectantly. 

When she reached up to touch the twinkle lights – giving the garage the similar dimly lit romantic mood that it had with the oil lamp the night they ended up sprawled on the floor, she shook her head, tears formulating in her eyes. On the workbench and scattered on the floor were also battery-operated candles flickering and red and white balloons slowly moving around because of the slight draft. 

She turned around wide-eyed and then saw Jacob leaning against the workbench, watching her. “What’s this for?”

“Thought we should pay tribute to the garage aside from one drunken night since it’s been pretty instrumental in where we are now,” he replied nervously as she walked over to him. He smirked as she approached, cockiness taking precedence. He easily wrapped his arms around her waist and then turned them, sitting her up on the bench like before, reaching down to hike her dress up so she could wrap her legs around his waist, her arms resting around his neck. 

“Pay tribute, huh? Is Billy going to be gone for a bit?”

“Jared will call me when he’s leaving,” he said lamely. “But let’s not talk about my dad right now.”

Leah laughed and leaned in, kissing him passionately, feeling her body light up at his touch as his fingers gently rubbed up and down her sides. When she reached to push his suit jacket off, he hesitated and pulled back. “One more thing,” he said, stepping away from her. It was agony leaving her, but his heartrate was up for something other than lust right now. He helped her off the workbench, causing her to pout, but he ignored her apprehension and brought her to the middle of the room. He let her hand go and stepped away before going over to a dimly lit part of the garage.

Leah stood there curiously as Jacob picked up something underneath a white sheet and brought it to the side of the floor covering he had laid down before unveiling it. It was the rocking horse her father had made her when him and her mom found out they were pregnant on her all those years ago. It had been down in the basement ever since she grew out of it. Sue had saved it for Leah for when she had kids and although that seemed improbable months ago, now, with a growing baby belly, seeing it felt overwhelming. Especially since Rachel had put her own touch on it – blue accents all around the small wooden horse. Jacob had fixed the handle on the side of the head that Seth had accidentally broken as a kid and the designs all over it were beautiful. Rachel had taken the old wooden rocking horse and made it beautiful and contemporary – at least she assumed it was Rachel considering Jacob’s ineptitude at art and creativity (outside the bedroom) as she had seen thus far in trying to design the nursery.

“Jake…”

“Do you like it? I hope it’s okay, I got Rebecca to paint it and fixed it up a little. Seth told me your dad made it when I pulled the crib out of the basement and saw it, so I thought it would be nice to add to our little guy’s room.”

Tears shone in Leah’s eyes and she brought a hand up to wipe a rogue one slipping down her cheek away. “I love it. You didn’t have to do that.”

“I wanted to bring a little bit of Harry to the nursery.”

Leah didn’t think she could love him anymore, but he continued to prove her wrong. Her heart swelled as she reached out and gently let her fingers glide over the smooth wood. Rebecca’s detail was extraordinary. “I knew you were a hopeless romantic since Bella,” she said, finally looking up to meet his gaze. “I just never expected to be the one it was directed to. Honestly? Aside from us butting heads – and my dreams about Bella because of you, I envied how much you cared about her and hated that she was just throwing that love away.”

“That’s not what you said on the cliffs,” Jacob said, a smirk quirking the sides of his lips up as she reached out to pull him close, her arms around his waist.

“Well dreaming about her really did suck – and now thinking about it is weird but the way you fought for her… even when she continually chose Edward… I don’t know. I thought maybe Sam would eventually do the same for me. It was very admirable…. Even if it was dumb.”

Jacob laughed, “Well, luckily Sam didn’t because I couldn’t have competed with him back then for you.”

“There’s no competition. You’ve got me, Jake. As long as fate allows. Sam and I were great when we were us, but… I always felt like it was too good to be true. Like he was too good to be true.”

“Uh, thanks?” Jacob asked.

She laughed, rolling her eyes. “I’m not saying you’re not – what I’m saying is with you, I feel like I can be utterly and completely myself. With him I was a love-sick teenager desperately seeking his love and affection. He gave it to me willingly when we were together, of course, but I was never entirely comfortable with him. I loved him, but he didn’t get me. I guess maybe back then there wasn’t so much to ‘get’. I was pretty boring – normal. But with you? I feel like you can see inside my soul. I don’t have to tell you when I’m sad or upset – you just know. It’s like…”

“I can read your mind?” He asked teasingly, winking at her.

“Yeah,” she admitted. “Even though you can’t now, you still know me – probably better than I know myself. And, you’ve given me a part of myself back that I thought was gone forever.”

“Which one?”

“Hope. Love. Happiness. The good parts. It’s been rocky, but… it brought us here.” She kept one arm around his waist, but then brought her other hand down to her belly and their eyes both looked down to her growing bump.

“I like it here.”

“Me too.”

He leaned down, gently pressing his lips to hers before he took a deep breath and stepped back from her, taking her hand – her left one, the other on her belly. It was now or never. “I have one more surprise for you.”

“Jacob, this was – is, more than enough.”

“I think you’ll like it.”

Suddenly, his heart racing in his chest, he bent down on one knee – clearly sweating in his suit, now. “Leah Clearwater,” he said huskily before clearing his throat. He reached into his pocket to grasp a small, black box. “You are the most beautiful and fiercest woman I’ve ever met. You have been faced with every kind of adversity and you’ve managed to overcome each and every one of them. I really do think the world only gives us what we can handle, and although there are days when I think there is no way I can ever try to soothe your wild heart, you’re still there every morning when I wake up. I never in a million years thought we would end up here – literally,” he chuckled nervously, referring to the garage, his eyes boring into hers. “And now the world has given us another challenge to overcome - parenthood. Only now? We don’t have to fight our battles alone anymore because we have each other to lean on, support one another, and be strong when the other can’t. Leah, we have definitely not been the perfect couple, but I think that’s what makes us the best partners for each other. I’m willing to choose you every minute of every day, and I want to be the best role model for our child because I know you’re going to be an amazing mother to our son.” He took another deep breath and Leah stood there in silence, tears slipping down her face as he opened the box, revealing a shiny diamond ring that her eyes barely saw as they flicked down to the box, then back to Jacob’s. “I want to make your dad proud and I will – fishing and all. I promise to love you and only you for the rest of my life. Leah Elizabeth Clearwater, I would love it if you would do me the honor of being my wife. Will you marry me?”

She remembered feeling annoyed at how cliché it was as soon as Rachel had done it on the beach, but she couldn't help it – her hands went right to her face, covering her slack jaw. She was shocked and elated and full of emotions she didn’t have time to explore. She had tears streaming down her cheeks – no help from the pregnancy hormones, of course. She took a deep breath before wiping her cheeks dry. “Jacob...” She knelt in front of him – as much as she could with her belly as more unforgiving tears clouded her vision and spilled down her cheeks. “Yes,” she said as her voice broke. All her prior worries about being married without her dad there slipped away as the man she loved knelt before her, asking her to marry him. She also recognized the ring immediately - his mothers. 

The ring was simple yet beautiful – one sizable diamond protruding from the center of a tapered white gold band. Jacob exhaled a sigh of relief and slid it on her finger. He immediately engulfed her into his arms, burying his face into her shoulder, his hand tangling in her hair as she hugged him tightly. “Mrs. Leah Elizabeth Black,” he said after a long moment of silence, his voice full of emotion. He pulled back and looked into her eyes – his mirroring her damp ones, and he kissed her, putting his entire soul into the way their lips moved together.

Leah felt like she was having an out of body experience and her hands cupped Jacob’s face as the kissing halted. She didn’t want to say it, but she couldn’t help but to ask. “Does Renesmee know?”

“Yes,” Jacob said solemnly. “I called her earlier today. She said congratulations and that she was excited to come to the wedding.”

“Does my mom know?”

“Yes.”

“Seth?”

“Yes. Don’t worry – I asked both of their permissions.”

Leah smiled and remembered Rachel’s weird parting behavior. “And Rachel?”

“Yup,” he mused. “And Sam and Jared helped set this up earlier between the pictures and dinner.”

“Billy?”

“He gave me the ring. He’s very accepting of his future-daughter-in-law – not that there was much else to accept considering I got you pregnant,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck feeling the perspiration as he slipped his jacket off to cool down now that there wasn’t a rock in it’s pocket. Leah reached up and gently loosened his tie and unbuttoned the first two buttons of his white dress shirt to aid in his cooling efforts.

“You’ve outdone yourself, Mr. Black. I also don’t think I’ve ever seen you so nervous – even when we found out I was pregnant.”

“Anything for you, Mrs. Black – to be fair, the baby was a done deal. The engagement, though… well, you could have said no.”

“Did you really think I would?”

He shrugged, “I was on the fence – with your dad and stuff. I just hoped you would say yes. We can have a long engagement if you want – or we can go back to the party and ask Rachel to get the officiant back right now. I’m at your mercy.”

Leah rolled her eyes but smirked, “A long engagement is fine by me. Let’s focus on the baby, first. I’d rather not be a pregnant bride.” The words felt foreign coming out of her lips, but they also felt so right.

Jacob pulled Leah against him and laid-back silencing any further banter. They laid side by side – which was uncomfortable on the floor, but neither could stop to complain as the passion igniting between them filled the small space. 

“I love you.” 

“I love you, too,” she pulled back momentarily, looking down at her hand in awe.

“The ring was my moms,” Jacob said, confirming what she already knew. “My dad wanted me to have it when I was old enough, to pass it onto my wife, but I engraved it for you.” Jacob reached down to take it off, to show her the engraving on the inner band.

‘To my Beta - I’ll always choose you.’

It was beautiful – and entirely fitting.

“I have one condition,” she said suddenly, meeting his confused gaze. “My last inarguable decision.”

“I think you’ll have plenty of those with wedding planning,” he teased. “But what’s your final one?”

She paused for dramatic effect and Jacob watched her curiously. “The wedding cake is vanilla.”

“Vanilla!? Come on, woman. At least get creative with red velvet or brownie fudge for our wedding.”

Leah laughed and leaned in, kissing him to silence his protests. “Vanilla and I’m yours.”

“You don’t like vanilla anymore,” he challenged, talking about a whole different flavor. 

“I think I’ve definitely succumbed myself to enjoying a little rocky road every now and then.”

“Well hold on, tight,” he mused, kissing her again as she laid back on the floor and he hovered over her, pushing the straps of her dress off her shoulders as her fingers continued to undo the buttons of his shirt while not breaking their kisses. She caught sight of her ring when she reached up to push the white material off his shoulders and his fingers managed to get the top half of the dress down and she smiled, feeling an indescribable love fill her chest – just as Jacob freed it from her strapless bra. 

“I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again – what the Hell is up with these things?” he asked, keeping himself up with one arm careful not to put any weight on her stomach as he held the bra with his free hand. “Strapless, strapped, clasp in the front, clasp in the back. Not to mention that weird bralette thing you had on the other day with no clasp. Can’t they standardize these things?”

Leah felt laughter erupt from her chest as she swatted the bra from his hand. “You got it off, what are you complaining for?”

“I’m just saying,” his lips went down to the base of her earlobe, pressing gentle kisses all along her flesh. “Throw a dog a bone.”

“My big bad wolf reduced to complaining about a little clasp. I thought you were more bad-ass than that? Or are you just practicing nursery rhymes?” He smirked devilishly as his lips continued down her neck, to her collarbone, and Leah hesitated. “Jake?” He met her gaze in way of affirmation. “When did you first realize there were feelings there?”

It was a weird ask, but something that had played on her mind since his words back at the cabin months ago when she was with Jeremy – when he asked her if the time before in her bedroom had meant anything to her. 

He hesitated before rolling off her. He sat beside her as she also sat up and tried not to focus on the fact that her chest was entirely exposed so he could formulate a real response. “It kind of crept up on me. I denied it for a long time because of the imprint and pretended like it was just physical but as for one specific time… well, I knew I was in deep when you started dating Jeremy because I hated it. When you called things off, back at the cabin, it hurt and I think I brushed it off to it hurting my pride instead of my feelings to stay in denial. Why?”

Leah shrugged, “Just curious. I remember at the cabin you mentioned the time before, in my room, and the shower…”

Jacob grinned, “Yeah, I mean. I think that’s when I really started to stop pushing the feelings down, but Jeremy definitely made me realize the full picture. What about you, Clearwater? When did you realize you fell for my charm?”

“I mean, the same as you, really. I denied it for so long because of the imprint but then when Jeremy wanted to make things more serious I kept stalling and just… knew he wasn’t you.”

“Well I’m glad we agreed that your ex-boyfriend brought us closer together while my imprint impended doom upon us.”

Leah shuffled over so she straddled his waist and Jacob leaned back with one arm so that he could grasp her hip with his hand. She pushed her hair back out of the way before leaning down to kiss him, their earlier fire igniting again, both resolved to not prolong their bodies coming together any longer this time.  
Jacobs fingers grasped the ruffled material around her waist and effortlessly pulled it down further. He couldn’t get it off since she was on top of him, but she had the bottom hiked up enough that all of the material hung around loosely around her hips. She easily unbuttoned his dress pants and felt the familiar thrill of their romantic relations being anything but vanilla as she pushed the material off his hips and maneuvered so that she could push them down and he could shimmy out of them – followed by his boxers. Jacob sat up and brought her torso as tightly to his as he could with her belly and kissed her again before he reached down and skillfully moving her thong to the side before he plunged into her, evoking a blissful cry from the she-wolf’s lips.

He kept her close, arms wrapped around her torso and buried his face into the crook of her neck gaining his lips access to her supple flesh as their bodies moved together. Their moans filled the small garage and it didn’t take long for them to both reach ecstasy as he fell back against the concrete floor, Leah on his chest, hair stuck to her forehead. His fingers pushed her hair back out of her face and he chuckled, “Best wedding yet.”

“Until ours,” she said coyly, looking down at her left hand as it rested against his chest. “I can’t believe we’re engaged.”

“A real family,” he promised. 

They stayed like that for half an hour before Leah yawned and Jacob checked his watch. “Let’s get you to bed – a real bed.”

She was about to reach down and fix her dress when she felt a weird, staggering feeling and she gasped.

“Are you okay?” Jacob asked quickly, seeing her hand go to her belly and a look of… disbelief? On her face.

“Fine… I think… I think the baby just moved for the first time.”

She took a steadying deep breath in and felt a small flutter again – nothing to be felt from the outside but definitely a strange feeling inside. She put Jacob’s hand over where she felt it, but the baby wasn’t strong enough to penetrate the motion through yet. Her breathing was still a little ragged as the feeling faded and Jacob hesitated, “Does it hurt?”

She smiled adoringly at him, “No it just feels… I don’t know how to explain it. Like a butterfly in my stomach?”

Jacob met her gaze and kissed her passionately. When it had been Emily and Bella’s stomach moving it always freaked him out and now was no different except that he knew it was their baby and although it still made him a little nauseous at the reality hitting him in the face, he also felt excited – and more nervous than ever. “I guess my proposal shocked him, too – or excited him that his parents are actually in love despite his rather… unorthodox conception.”

“Or maybe we woke him up when we made good use of the garage floor – again.”

Jacob laughed, “Guess we’ll have to be more careful and respect bedtime from now on.”

Leah grinned and reached for something above their heads. Jacob’s brow furrowed as he strained to see what she was going after and moments later, she smirked, his tie between her fingertips. She gently passed the tie to him with an invitation in her eyes that made his heart rate rise again, but he didn’t hesitate as he brought the material up and put it against her closed eyes, awkwardly tying it around the back of her head. She laid on the floor, naked and blindfolded and for a moment, Jacob could do nothing but drink in her beauty. Her body was petite, but taller than most girls because of the wolf gene. He couldn’t believe he ever thought her as unattractive – not that her body changed, but her attitude had shifted their focus away from her beauty. Her hair fell over her chest, breasts fuller thanks to the pregnancy, nipples hard. His eyes continued down her body, taking in the protrusion from her belly where their love had blossomed into creation, and then down to her long, lean legs. 

“Jake?” she asked, breaking the silence.

Clearing his throat, he said, “Just admiring what’s mine.”

“Well come and claim me, then.”

The words brought another wave of familiar fire to his lower region and he rolled on top of her, careful not to put too much weight on her as his arms rested on both sides of her head. He leaned down, kissing her lips, sucking on her bottom lip momentarily as one of his hands moved to gently run his fingertips teasingly up and down her side, gently brushing her boob but not touching it directly. When a soft moan escaped her lips, Jacob felt himself pressing against her thigh – but he wasn’t rushing it again.

His mouth followed its familiar pattern down her body, kissing and sucking as he went and he took Leah’s hand as he kissed around her belly button and brought it to the juncture of her thighs. She didn’t have to be told twice, realizing the effect of her teasing picture earlier and she took control as Jacob’s lips teased her. When he kissed his way back up to her lips, her fingers quickened, but Jacob reached down then and took her hand away as he felt her body tense. “Not so fast, Clearwater,” he said huskily, kissing the spot just below her engagement ring before he moved forward, plunging himself into her again causing her to cry out.

He moved inside her, one hand gripping her thigh to keep her body tight to his, the other holding himself up. His body hit her accurately and efficiently and Leah was so close to feeling the terrific, warm bliss throughout her body when he pulled out of her. She was about to pout, but then brought his hips toward hers again and her back arched up, pressing her torso closer to his – and also allowing him to feel just how much bigger her belly had gotten. Only a minute later, Jacob felt her body wrack with pleasure – and heard her small shallow breaths and felt himself lose control, too, before he kissed her sweetly and reached behind, undoing the tie. He smiled as their eyes met – full of pleasure, satiety, and love, and brushed a gentle kiss to her lips. “I never thought a tie could be so useful.”

She giggled – a sound so strange coming from such a fierce woman’s mouth, but one that made him swoon all over again. “A lot of things are useful if you know how to use them right.”

“I’ll take you up on that – I want a list and experimental time.”

Once they caught their breath, they both got dressed between kisses and Jacob turned off the electricity in the garage before he took her hand and led her back outside where their luck had finally run out and drizzle fell from the sky. “Probably good timing – I guess this will rain the rest of the night out and my dad should be home soon.” 

Leah smirked and snuggled close to him as they walked back to the Clearwater’s. When they stepped through the door, hair coated with water droplets, Leah dressed in Jacob’s suit jacket, she realized her mom and Seth had just gotten home, too.

She greeted them as she discarded Jacob’s jacket and took off her heels. “Hey, Lee,” Seth said warily before he saw it – the ring on her left hand. “I guess congratulations are in order?”

Leah smiled at her brother, her entire face lit with a joy Sue had thought would never come back to her daughter’s face after Sam. “I guess so considering we’re getting married!”  
Sue’s joy mirrored Leah’s and she immediately engulfed them both into a hug. She couldn’t help the tears formulating in her eyes and as they pulled back, Leah gulped. “Mom don’t cry-“

“I’m so happy for you both,” she said, clearing her throat. “You have no idea what it has been like watching you go through everything the past year.” She looked at Jacob, “Thank you for giving me my daughter back.”

Jacob felt himself growing emotional again – and Leah’s eyes now mirrored Sue’s. It was Seth who spoke, though, “Although you’re technically stealing her away – I guess it’s time to start calling you brother, huh?”

Jacob chuckled and ruffled Seth’s hair playfully. “I guess so.”

“Congrats,” he hugged his sister. 

“Well,” she said as she pulled back. “I never thought I’d be a pregnant fiancée, but here we are.”

Jacob shrugged, “So was Emily, technically. And Rachel almost was, too.”

“Rachel?” Sue asked, brow furrowed.

“Yeah, they, uh, kind of had a pregnancy scare a few months ago.”

“Does anyone around here know what a condom is?” Seth asked.

Sue looked to her son, “Do you?”

“I do, actually,” Seth said in a much more grown up way. “And Abigail is on birth control, now - which is why I don’t get all of these unexpected babies popping up everywhere. It’s really not that hard to… well, prevent it.”

Jacob laughed, “Well, Emily and Sam decided not to prevent it – at least they were engaged. And Leah and I… well that’s a totally different circumstance in itself. Rachel accidentally missed a pill, so at least they were trying to prevent it.”

“Not anymore,” Leah said tauntingly.

Jacob’s brow furrowed, “Huh?”

“The pack must have taken after me once I left for keeping things under wraps from you,” she teased. “After the scare, Rach came off birth control because they decided to start trying. After tonight God knows how many little Black-babies will be running around in 9 months.” Jacob cringed, and Leah laughed. “Don’t tell her I told you. She only told me last week.”

“Lovely,” Jacob said dryly.

“Well they are married now,” Seth shrugged.

“Still my sister.”

“And Leah’s mine - don’t forget it,” Seth shot back. 

Sue grinned, “I’m going to stay here tonight – I’m exhausted. I’ll see you in the morning for breakfast okay?” 

Sue left and Seth yawned, “Me too. I’d advise no funny business since mom’s room’s right next to yours,” he said as he reached the top of the stairs. “She may not have wolf hearing, but she’s not deaf.”

Jacob chuckled as he pulled Leah close, kissing her hair. “No worries, we got that out of our system already.”

Seth cringed and turned to go downstairs but Leah called after him. “Can I talk to you for a second?”

“I’ll be upstairs,” Jacob said, hearing the subtle message. When Jacob was gone, Leah went over to sit on the couch, patting the spot beside her for Seth who followed suit.

“We’re not going to be getting married anytime soon,” she stated. “I want to have the baby first and settle into that before we make anymore changes but I wanted to ask you something.”

“What’s up?” he asked, seeing Leah growing a little emotional as she took a deep breath.

“I was hoping you would walk me down the aisle when the time comes – in lieu of dad.”

It was a big ask – not that it was any problem, but he felt the weight in her words and he immediately reached over and pulled her into a hug. It was weird that her little brother was bigger than her now, but she fell into the sibling embrace and when they pulled back a moment later, both of their eyes shone with unshed tears. 

“I would love that,” he said finally, as a tear slipped down Leah’s cheek. He smiled and reached over, wiping it off, proving to her again that he wasn’t a kid anymore – and he was protective over her inasmuch as she was him.

“Thanks, Seth.”

“You’re going to be the most beautiful bride,” he said, taking her hands in his. “I’m really glad that Jacob stepped up for you and the baby. It’s really weird to think I’m going to be an uncle soon, and that you’re going to be married, but I can see how happy he makes you. I think I’ve finally come around to you guys being together – as weird as it was at first.”

“I know. I’m sorry about that – we didn’t mean to make things such a mess at first,” she grinned and paused. “It’s going to be a different day without dad there, but I think it’ll still be good.”

“It’ll be great,” Seth assured her, squeezing her hand. “Have you finally stopped blaming yourself?”

The question took her by surprise, and she faltered before dropping his gaze. “I think so. I mean, I obviously didn’t know what was happening and I didn’t want to hurt him. It’s just easier to blame myself sometimes than wonder why the universe took him from us. At least if I blame myself, I don’t have to wonder why anymore.”

“The why doesn’t matter. If you want an answer to everything, you’ll drive yourself crazy – imprinting, for example. No one really knows why but does that really matter? It happened, it’s done, and we just need to accept not knowing why all of the time and try to adapt.”

“You sound old,” she said, grinning at his maturity.

“You’re the one engaged and pregnant,” he teased.

“Touché.” 

They went to retired to bed after another hug and Leah found Jacob under the covers looking at his phone, but he put it away when she entered. He tried to play dumb, but she knew he heard everything downstairs. The house had been deadly silent, and his wolf-hearing was unforgiving. 

“What are you looking at?” She asked, slipping out of her dress.

“Pictures this incredibly hot woman sent me earlier today – ‘wanna see?”

She laughed and crawled into bed beside him. “Nah, they’re all yours.”

He pulled her close and kissed her forehead. “Good talk?”

She nodded, “Seth’s going to walk me down the aisle. I think you should ask Rachel to dance with you at the reception – and Seth can dance with me.”

“I like that idea,” he murmured against her lips. “Why don’t we just have Seth and Rachel stand, too? Small and intimate.”

“That sounds perfect.”

The next morning Charlie came over before his shift for breakfast and they had a nice family meal before Jacob and Leah headed over to Billy’s where they were meeting Rachel, Paul, and Rebecca for a small gift opening. Solomon had to get an earlier flight out because of his surf lessons so he had left late last night after the wedding and Rebecca was flying back with Rachel and Paul later today for their honeymoon.

They found the foursome in the living room and sat on the love seat opposite Rachel, Paul, and Rebecca, hand in hand.

“I hear congratulations are in order,” Rebecca smirked.

“Today is about you,” Leah eyed Rachel.

“It was my idea to do it last night,” she said proudly. “Jake told me he had the ring, so I figured it’d be nice to do before Rebecca went back and before we left for a couple weeks.”

Leah gave her a thankful smile before Billy wheeled over and hugged them both. “Congratulations – I guess I have another wedding to help pay for.”

“And probably a new grand baby after last night,” Rebecca elbowed Rachel who turned beet red in front of her dad.

“One thing at a time,” Billy said begrudgingly as Paul chuckled and kissed Rachel’s hair. 

“Rebecca – thanks for polishing up the rocking horse. It’s beautiful.”

She smiled lovingly, “It’s my gift to you both since I probably won’t be here when you have the baby.”

“Okay, let’s open presents,” Rachel said eagerly.

Rachel and Paul got all of the typical wedding stuff – picture frames, keepsakes, money. Considering it had been a smaller wedding than Sam and Emily’s, it surprised Leah to see how much stuff they had gotten – she and Jacob had given them money and a photo album and they had paid for the wedding music as a gift. Billy had paid for Rachel’s dress and their honeymoon plane tickets and Rebecca was taking care of all of their accommodations at her place for the entirety of their stay in their guest house, paid for the decorations, and had also flown home for the wedding which was an expense in itself.

“I guess I’ll have to start writing out thank-you cards.”

“I can help,” Leah offered. “But for now, get your stuff together and get to Hawaii and enjoy the sun for us all.”

Rachel laughed and hugged them all, not realizing it was time to go to the airport already. Rebecca hugged her dad tightly for a long time, tears flowing down her cheeks. It made Leah a little emotional to watch their goodbye and her and Jacob went out to get in the SUV to bring the them to the airport after he had loaded all of their bags up.

“It’s always hard leaving,” Rebecca said, wiping her cheeks dry as she got in the back with the newlyweds. “Now, if you start making out, I’m walking to the airport.”

“If they start making out, I’m walking to the airport,” Jacob tossed back dryly.

“No promises,” Paul chuckled as Rachel leaned into him having sat in the middle seat to be close to Paul and give Rebecca room and comfort for her rather large belly and swollen feet from all the dancing.

The car ride was quiet – more so than Leah expected considering Paul’s amusement in bugging Jacob, but they were all lost in their own thoughts. Once they pulled up to the departure terminal and they walked them inside, Rebecca hugged Jacob tightly, more tears coming. “Call me as soon as Leah’s water breaks, okay?”

“I will – if I can remember how to breathe,” Jacob only half-joked as Rachel and Paul both hugged Leah goodbye and told her to call if they needed anything. Leah wished the newlyweds well and winked at Rachel before they checked in and Rebecca engulfed Leah into a hug. “I’ll call you once his cousin is here,” she said, gently rubbing Leah’s belly as she pulled back. Rebecca was due before Emily – which would be sooner rather than later.

“Make sure you call and tell me all the details – I’ll forward them along to Emily to help prepare.”

Rebecca laughed, “I will – if I can remember. I want as many drugs as possible. Take care of my little brother,” she said, looking between them. “And you take care of my best friend.”

“Will do, Becs,” Jake smirked.

Rebecca lingered a little longer, finally pulling Jacob into one more hug. “I can’t believe how grown up you are. I wish I could stay… maybe someday.”

“It’s okay – there’s always a phone call. Good luck with the rest of the pregnancy.”

Finally, Rebecca – tears and all, got the resolve to walk away and check in for the flight and Jacob and Leah waved to them all as they disappeared through security. Leah turned to Jacob and saw tears in his eyes and pulled him into a hug, her tiny frame pressing against his larger one, arms around his torso.

She couldn’t picture Seth leaving and could imagine the ache in his chest. “C’mon,” she said, trying to lighten the mood as she pulled back and looked up to him. “Another ultrasound is calling. Let’s see our little nugget again.”

“Our nugget?” Jacob chuckled, following her from the airport as he blinked the dampness in his eyes. “Is that the baby’s new nickname or are you hinting at McDonald’s for lunch?”

She shrugged as she threw him the keys and slipped into the passenger side. “Both.”

They got to Carlisle’s a little while later – after stopping for McDonald’s, of course. Edward and Renesmee were there with Carlisle this time as well as an unexpected visitor – Rosalie.

“I hope you don’t mind,” Rosalie said as they stepped into the foyer. “I just… wanted to come and see you and the ultrasound, if that’s okay?”

Leah exchanged an awkward look with Jacob but nodded, “Of course.”

She knew Rosalie’s history – desperately craving a baby of her own but being unable to conceive naturally and because of their supernatural state, adoption wasn’t an option for her. Leah remembered the fear of infertility weighing down on her and felt bad for Rosalie, having communicated understanding Rosalie’s actions to Jacob before regarding Bella’s pregnancy. 

“Congratulations,” Edward said coyly as they all piled into Carlisle’s study. 

“On what?” Renesmee asked, hearing her dad.

Edward had read their thoughts, but also caught sight of the ring on Leah’s finger and Renesmee’s eyes followed. “You did it,” she said, knowing he had called to talk to her about it but still taken off guard at the abruptness – he hadn’t told her when he was doing it when he called to tell her. “Congratulations.”

“Thanks, Ness,” Jacob said. 

“How did you do it?”

“Last night after the wedding,” Leah said, getting comfortable on the table as Carlisle lifted her shirt as usual and put the blue goo on her bump before starting the machine. He found the heartbeat easily and showed them the rather larger baby in her tummy.

Rosalie was enraptured and smiled, “A boy, huh?”

“Yep,” Jacob answered as Leah’s eyes danced across the small black and white image. 

“Any names picked out? My best friend, Vera, had a son named Henry when we were younger.”

“Nothing for sure, yet,” Leah said as Carlisle took some new measurements. “I felt a flutter last night for the first time,” she told Carlisle.

He smiled, “Good. Everything looks great. You’re progressing nicely. Any concerns?”

“Any updated due date?”

“Still looking like it’ll be around September month. Probably mid-September but I don’t want to narrow it down too much just yet. It’s possible you could fly through the third trimester when you hit it. You’re still in the second, but probably only for another week or so.”

She nodded, “So only another couple months?”

It was the end of June, now.

“Or sooner.”

Leah nodded, feeling both excitement to meet their baby and extreme unease at the quick timeline. Carlisle sensed her mood change and smiled, “Don’t worry about a thing. Once you’re close, I’ll stick around and make sure everything goes smoothly. That is if you do still want me to deliver him? There doesn’t seem to be any supernatural markers thus far except the time frame. A hospital wouldn’t see anything different.”

“I’d like you to – if you don’t mind.” She had begun to trust Carlisle - at least when it came to medical advice.

“I don’t mind at all,” he promised, going over to wash his hands after he wiped the gel off her tummy.

“I’m going to visit you before the baby’s born,” Jacob said to Renesmee. “If that’s okay?”   
Renesmee looked to her dad and he nodded. “We likely will have our hands full once he’s here and I won’t be able to visit as frequently and after everything you’ve all done thus far it’s not fair to keep asking you to come here. When Carlisle thinks she’s close, I’ll come back with you for a few days to satisfy the imprint before coming back here for the delivery.” He and Leah already talked about it and agreed him missing out on a few days at the end would be better so that they could have uninterrupted family time as soon as the baby was born. She didn’t necessarily like it, but, well, she was having his baby and now engaged to marry him, so she had to trust him.

“August should be a good time based on her current rate,” Carlisle agreed. 

“We’ll play it by ear.”

“My baby shower is going to be mid-July,” Leah said, facing Renesmee and Rosalie. “If you’d like to come – Bella, too, of course. It’s just going to be small – supernatural friendly.” She already had her gift from them in the form of a hefty cheque but wanted to extend an olive branch and saw the adoration in Rosalie’s eyes. “Maybe you could even visit once he’s here – all of you.”

“Absolutely. I love picking out clothes,” Rosalie said happily, Renesmee agreeing as well. Things finally seemed normal.


	22. Alpha in Training

Emily’s baby shower the week before felt surreal. Seeing her large, expectant belly was a little nerve-wracking considering how quickly Leah’s was catching up now in her third trimester. Carlisle assured her she had time left – but nearing the end of July knowing September was still her expected delivery date was scary. Emily could go anytime, now. 

She had fended off lots of extended families questions about her own pregnancy at Emily’s shower but she managed to fake the timeline enough that they assumed both girls had been or gotten pregnant around the same time - and Emily’s mom gushed over the girls having their babies close together and Leah’s new engagement.

If she was being honest, as adorable as all of the gift’s Emily received were she was so glad to get back home when the three hours were up – and, as cute as the frilly little pink dresses were she was even more glad that they were having a boy for the simplicity. Jacob and Seth were playing games on the couch and both looked up, pausing the game as she came in.

“How was it?” Jacob asked curiously. 

“Long,” she responded, kicking her shoes off, a hand automatically going to her large belly. Thankfully, she and Sue had gone shopping for more maternity clothes because her closet was slowly dwindling to body-appropriate clothing. 

Today, she had on a light pink tank top that cinched under her bust – which was also a hindrance lately, and it flowed out comfortably over her bump, along with some extremely mom-looking pregnancy jeans. Jacob assured her she was still beautiful – and sexy, but lately with swollen feet, a bugling belly, sensitive boobs, and a very short temper she had trouble believing him.

“Won’t be much longer until yours – next week, right?”

“Yep and I finish up at the souvenir shop tomorrow.”

“Getting close now,” Seth remarked.

“Don’t remind me.”

“You’ll be fine – I promise,” Jacob assured her.

“I’m going to organize the nursery a little more.”

She left the boys downstairs and waddled up the stairs into the far bedroom that used to be Seth’s. Jacob had the crib set up, but it still needed a mattress and there had been an old dresser in the basement that Seth had helped her paint giving it a refreshed look. The rocking horse Rebecca had painted was in the corner of the room next to Seth’s old toyboy which was empty for now. Her and Jacob had originally pleaded with their parents – and siblings, to let them furnish and complete it themselves considering the Cullen’s hefty cheque which neither had disclosed the true amount to anyone else, but they had said she needed a shower to complete the experience so she was left waiting to get everything entirely together.

Thankfully, Jacob had the walls painted at least. It was a rustic green on the top of the wall, separated mid-way to a brown paint on the bottom-half. In the middle of the two colors, Rachel had gotten dinosaur footprint stencils and weaved the colors together by putting an array of green prints on the brown and vice-versa. It was pretty artistic and looked adorable. The only thing Leah had bought thus far was a cute dinosaur-mobile she had found a month ago, a cute dinosaur teddy bear that sat on the dresser, dinosaur bedding which was in the rocking chair by the crib that was aching for a mattress to go on, and a cute little trolley that was beside the dresser for diapering – the rest was bare.

She finished setting the trolley up anyways and opened the small closet seeing the shelving unit Jacob and Seth had installed while she was out. She couldn’t wait until it was filled with clothes for their little man, but it still felt so strange. The only thing that felt real were her swollen feet, exhaustion, and the now prominent kicks from their little wolf-int-the-making. If she positioned Jacob’s hand just right, he, too, could feel them now and she remembered last week as she watched his face light up just how excited – albeit strange, the whole experience felt to him.

She spent most of the afternoon up in the nursery picking at little details and looking through her laptop to order a nice rug to tie the room together – once it was filled with baby essentials. She also managed to order a few essentials for herself for once the baby was born, a diaper bag, and an infant tub before sitting back in the rocking chair and rocking back and forth, picturing the room complete soon with a little baby in the crib. It was getting dark out by the time Jacob went up to find her and he smiled, leaning in the door frame. 

“I think this is your new favorite place.”

“It’s serene – at least until there’s a screaming baby in here.” He chuckled and walked over, his fingers trailing on the crib as she sighed, “I ordered a few more things. I guess the rest will have to wait until after the shower.”

They were doing a joint baby shower and diaper party next Sunday so the whole pack could come and hang out and they were combining Jacob and Sam’s diaper parties for the same day, too. “Should be fun.”

“I guess so.”

Jacob hesitated before leaning against the wooden crib and looking at her. She was tired – quite visibly so, and he had been keeping something for the last month trying to find a good time but there never seemed to be one.

“Can I tell you something?” She nodded, brow furrowed at the seriousness of his tone and he reached into the back of his jeans pocket, pulling out an envelope Sue had given him the morning after Rachel and Paul’s wedding.

“Your mom gave me this after I proposed. Apparently, Harry had written letters before he died – for special moments in your and Seth’s life.”

Leah’s face transformed from confusion to awe then to sadness. “What’s that one for?” She asked, trying to keep the emotion out of her voice.

“For me – your future husband.” He waited as she digested the information and her eyes grew damp. “I thought we could read it together – if you’re up for it. Your mom said he has more letters written for you and Seth but I’d assume she’s waiting to give them to you until whatever they’re for happens.”

“So he was a lot sicker than either of them told us originally,” she pieced together. “To think this far ahead… he had to have a reason.”

“Your mom said she kept the severity from you guys to make the end… well, more enjoyable for everyone but that they also didn’t think he had such little time left. Harry wrote the letters on his own accord.”

Leah sighed and got up, “Let’s go into our room.”

Jacob followed her to the bedroom on the opposite side of the hall and they both sat on her bed, leaning against the headboard. Jacob put an arm around Leah after unfolding the letter and taking a deep breath. “Do you want me to read it out loud?” She nodded and he began to read the note.

“To my daughter’s future husband:

I know to you, my daughter is a fine young woman who’s as equally strong headed as she is beautiful. I want you to know that no matter how old she gets, she’ll always be my first-born, my beautiful wildflower, and my little girl. Unfortunately, I know the probability of me being able to attend her wedding is low. I probably will never even meet you - her husband to be. I’m not sure why I decided to write this, but I thought it may give her some comfort to know that if she picked you, I support her decision even if I’m not there to witness it. If there is a Heaven, I’ll be there, looking down on you both with my unconditional love. I have to believe there is a Heaven – or something beautiful awaiting me once I pass through this life. I never thought I’d get a death sentence so early in life – before I got to really see my kids grow up into the people the amazing people they’re destined to be, but I can only go forward with the knowledge that everything happens for a reason and I want to leave as much behind for my children during the best times of their lives as possible. That’s why I’m writing you today.”

Leah was already crying, face buried into Jacob’s shoulder as he read and held her tightly, feeling his own eyes growing damp, but he continued, feeling Harry’s presence surrounding them in the small rom.

“Leah Elizabeth Clearwater was born on an ordinary, rainy day in an ordinary hospital room with ordinary parents; but I want you to know my little girl is extraordinary. She’s strong – stronger than you’d think both emotionally and physically. She’s determined, courageous, loving, and sympathetic. I thought I knew what love was when I married her mother, but the day Leah was born I felt my heart grow in ways I never thought possible. Then, when Seth was born and she proved to be a protective older sister and I loved her even more seeing her kind heart and compassion blossom. She was worried when we told her she was getting a sibling – it was pretty adorable, actually. She told me she didn’t think I would love her as much anymore and that was the first day that I felt true heartbreak. A little girl, worried about the love of her father and having that compromised. As much as I think she wanted a little sister, when we told her it was a boy, I think she was relieved – happy she didn’t have to share her mother or me with a sister. I told Sue after that I thought we should stop having kids even though we had originally agreed on three, and she agreed, so that we could give as much of our love and attention to Leah and Seth. I don’t think Leah would have taken well to another little girl taking up my or her mother’s time. Leah has changed my life. She’s the baby that made me a dad and has shown me love that was beyond my realm of comprehension until I held her for the first time.”

“That’s why I need you to know how special she is. She’s not just a women – she’s my little girl whether she is five or fifty and you need to know that you’ll never tame her wild heart, her passionate soul, or her fiery personality – but you don’t need to because I know if she’s chosen you to spend the rest of her life with and someday have a family with, you love and respect her for those qualities already, just as much as I do. I know you’ll take care of her because she wouldn’t have chosen to be with someone who didn’t challenge and complement her and make her feel beautiful. I hope beyond any struggles that life will ultimately throw at you, that you’ll see how amazing she is and that you grow into a partnership that will rival the storms and help you weather them. My life, although shorter than we imagined, has been a life well-lived and I wouldn’t go back and change a thing. I spoke to Sue before writing this letter – she thinks I’m crazy for writing it, but she told me she knew my passing would have a huge impact on both of my kids – especially Leah because of her inconsolable heart. She is strong, as I’ve said, so it will take a lot for her to open up to someone and show her emotions, but I know there will be an adjustment. She told me when she was a little girl and skinned out both of her knees and her chin riding her bike that she wouldn’t cry because I never; even with tears filling her beautiful brown eyes that she wouldn’t let spill over. I knew then that my spirit was inside of her – a determination to never show weakness despite life’s struggles. I want you both to know, as I write this, I’m anything but strong and my cheeks are wet with the notion that there will be times she’ll need me, and I won’t be able to be there for her. Like her wedding day, when she has her own family, and all of the moments in between when a girl needs her dad. But I am with her – and you, always.”

“I hope her eyes light up when you walk into the room. I hope you’re always a team, come back together stronger after every argument – because trust me, the honeymoon phase doesn’t last forever and that’s okay, and ultimately, I hope that you’ve found a best friend in each other. When romance feels pale, life gets in the way, and spontaneity isn’t at the top of your list, I hope you can look at each other and still see the second part of your soul looking back at you. I found that with Sue and she’s made me a very lucky man and a grateful and blessed father.”

“More than anything, I hope you realize my daughter is at least half as amazing as I do – because she’s nothing but brilliant in my eyes and no matter what she could ever do, there is nothing that could change my love for her. If you experience half of my love for her, I’ll see you as a fine suitor. I hate that I don’t get to meet you and pretend like she’s some treasured jewel you’re stealing away and threaten you if you ever break her heart, but I know she can look after herself and her brother and mother will be there to enforce any threats I could ever think of and give her a shoulder to cry on when you fight or argue and need some time apart to breath before reconciling.”

“My wish for you both is eternal happiness – and one day, for you to have a family so you can feel the overwhelming love that I do for my children. It’s an experience you’ll never forget. But for now, treat my little girl right, love her unconditionally, and remember that even though we may never meet, she’s one of my life’s most prized accomplishments and I want every pleasure life has for her – including your wedding. I may not get to walk her down the aisle, but I don’t need to – she learned to walk by herself when she was a year old and she’ll hold her own walking down the aisle on her wedding day without me – I know it. I’ll be there in spirit and if she ever misses me, please don’t let her. Sue’s yelling out for me to go deal with her now, actually – apparently her and Seth got into a fight. Kids – the best thing ever, but a constant battle, especially teenagers. Take care of my little girl and know that you have my blessing as long as you do your best to make her happy. I’m sure she’ll read this letter, too, and Leah, please know that I trust you to follow your heart and make the right decisions. I love you, my little wildflower, and I hope my son-in-law is everything you’ve ever wanted. Happy engagement. I’ll see you on your wedding day – you’re going to be gorgeous.”

Jacob’s face was wet and Leah was full-on sobbing as he laid the letter down on the bed and pulled her into his chest as closely as her belly would allow. He supported her with one arm and his other hand went down to rub soothing circles on her belly as it shook with tears. He didn’t say anything and neither did she, but they didn’t need to. Harry’s words played on a loop in his mind and only when Leah’s tears subsided, and his cheeks were dry did he allow himself to let go of her and pull back to see her face. He cupped it in his hands and leaned in to kiss her before trusting himself to speak.

“I promise I’ll make your dad proud,” he said, clearing his throat.

“I know you will,” she whispered taking a deep, shaky breath in. “I can’t believe he wrote that – that he knew he wouldn’t be here, but I didn’t.”

“They were protecting you,” Jacob replied, smoothing her hair back. “But he did get one thing wrong.”

“He did meet you,” Leah said, catching onto his train of thought as a small smile came to her lips. “And he loved you.”

“I guess we were always meant to be, huh? Wish I tried to steal you from Sam as soon as you decided playing in the sandbox with me was ‘too childish’.”

Leah laughed, which sounded so beautifully sweet to his ears after watching her heart break moments ago. “You probably hadn’t even reached puberty yet,” she teased.

“Hey! I was like…”

“Ten?”

“Okay, not fair.”

She laughed and leaned in to kiss him again before the laid back and Jacob put the letter on the night table, taking Leah into his arms. She rested her cheek on his chest and sighed, “My dad thought of everything.”

“He was a good man.”

“Sometimes I’m not sure how I got so lucky,” she said, placing a hand on her belly. “I know it’s nothing like I pictured, but I didn’t think I could love someone again after Sam, but he was only a warm-up. This is what it’s supposed to be like.” 

He leaned down to kiss her, getting lost in the taste of her lips. “I’m the lucky one.”

Jacob had patrol not long after that, and he left, assured Leah was okay and safely tucked into bed. He met Sam and Embry in the clearing behind his place and was about to phase when his phone rang. He answered it automatically. 

“Jake?”

“Ness?”

“I need to talk to you.”

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah… I just… I got into a fight with my parents. It wasn’t pretty. I said some things I probably shouldn’t have.”

“Like what?”

“It doesn’t matter. I just… wanted to hear your voice.”

He knew the context wasn’t innocent – he could hear the ache for him in her voice, and he felt it, too – the imprint. It wasn’t necessarily romantic, but it did feel like he had to be near her and comfort her. Unfortunately, he was much too far for that and if he ran all the way to her because of one argument, Leah would definitely be pissed.

“Well I’m here. Always, you know that.”

“I miss you.”

“I miss you, too, Ness.”

“Maybe I can move back?”

The question took him off guard. “Yourself?”

“Well… Marcus said the volturi are pretty occupied with the fallout of losing him, Demetri, and Jane. I don’t think they’d be looking for me – not that they probably care about me anymore anyways.”

“You’d be unprotected.”

“I’d have the pack.”

Jacob hesitated. The pack would protect her, as his imprint, if harm were to come and he was sure they were stronger than any leech, but the volturi? If they came, surely, they would need more brute force. It could even lead to more wolves phasing which seemed like going backwards now that Sam and Paul had almost mastered their phasing. Plus, any vampire presence could affect his unborn child. “We wouldn’t be able to protect you constantly, though.”

“I probably wouldn’t even need protection – the threat is so low. I thought you’d be happy to be closer?”

“Is this about the engagement?”

“What? No, why?”

“You didn’t seem… too thrilled when you found out about it.” They hadn’t talked about it since, but he felt the cold shoulder she had given him since finding out. The imprint made it impossible not to care, even though they both knew they were way past a point of reconciliation in a romantic way.

“I just don’t like being away from you. I have no friends here. It’s lonely.”

“I thought Nahuel was there?”

“He was – for a while. I really like him, I do. I think… well, maybe there could even be something there, but I can’t exactly call him up every time I have a fight with my parents. He’s not you.”

“Not your imprint, you mean.”

“No – not you. Imprint or not, you’re my best friend, Jake.”

“I’m only a phone call away, Ness. Plus, I’ll be visiting in a few weeks, remember?”

“I know – I just… ugh, I’m just so mad and upset and I don’t know what to do. Talking to you just helps.”

“That’s the imprint.”

“No, that’s our friendship.”

“It’s a bit of both, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, probably. I didn’t call to cause trouble, I just wanted to talk.”

“I’m just going to start patrol, can I call you after?”

“Sure. How’s Leah?”

“She’s good – getting close. Go tell Bella you’re sorry – whatever it was about, just apologize; she’ll forgive you.”

“I will,” she promised. “Be safe, okay?”

“I will. You, too, Ness. ‘Night.”

“’Night, Jake.”

Jacob sighed and pushed the phone into his pocket before running off with the guys. Patrol was uneventful, as they liked it and they phased back outside of the Clearwater’s just as Seth ran out.

“Jake! Leah needs you-“

“What’s wrong?” he asked, alarm suddenly flooding through him as Sam and Embry and him came out of the brush in their backyard.

“She’s in a lot of… discomfort. She’s afraid the baby’s coming.”

Jacob, Embry, and Sam ran inside with Seth and Jacob went to Leah’s side on the couch. “Are you okay?”

She nodded, fear evident in her eyes. “I just keep getting these strong contractions. They’re not painful… but I can see my stomach shift with each one and it’s really uncomfortable.”

“Braxton hicks,” Sam said, coming into view. “Unless they’re painful or you experience anything else, they’re normal – expected. The night of the party, when you stopped the car? That’s what this is. They can be pretty… uncomfortable Emily says. You’re farther along now – close to delivery, so you may experience them more.”

She was so glad to have Sam here because his knowledge soothed her as Jacob took her hand. “They’re not painful? You’re sure?”

She shook her head, her breathing labored. “No, but they’re worse than they’ve ever been before. I guess because I’m so far along… I just thought maybe the baby was coming…”

Sam gave her a comforting smile. “No baby – not yet anyways. Take a deep breath.” She felt it again and shifted, rubbing her stomach, and taking long breaths in, letting them out slowly. “Try getting up and moving around,” Sam offered. “It helps Emily to move.”

She did. Jacob kept her hand as he walked around the coffee table with her, and it did help. “Better?”

She nodded, “Yeah – better than before anyways.”

“We’ll get going,” Embry said finally- having been silent thus far out of his own fear of pregnancy and Leah going into labor in the living room.

“Call if you need anything,” Sam said before both boys left Leah, Jacob, and Seth.

“She scared the hell out of me,” Seth groaned, causing Jacob to laugh. 

“Let’s get you to bed – it’s late.”

They all retired to their rooms and Leah curled into Jacob finding sleep quickly. Jacob, trying to forget how terrified he had been, found sleep quickly, too, as his adrenaline slowed. The next thing he knew, Leah’s alarm was going off and he groaned as she got up and ready for work.

“Maybe you should stay home,” he said as she stepped back into their room wrapped in a towel post-shower.

“It’s my last day.”

“Are you feeling okay?”

“Fine. It’s only four hours and then I’ll be home.”

She pacified him long enough to get ready, eat breakfast, kiss him goodbye and make it to the souvenir shop on the beach twenty minutes before her shift. She almost ran straight into Meredith. She had seen her at the wedding with a few of their other high school friends but not since.

“Leah!” Meredith said happily, nursing an iced coffee despite the rather cool breeze. “You look great!” 

“Thanks, I thought you were leaving after the wedding?”

She shrugged, her earlier excitement fading to sorrow. “I was but… I left Caleb, so I thought I would stick around here with my parents for a little bit.”

“I’m sorry,” Leah frowned. “I mean, not that you left him – good, but I know it couldn’t have been easy.”

“It wasn’t. He promised he’d quit drinking and wouldn’t lay a hand on me ever again but… I’d heard it all before, y’know? It really sucks – but he wasn’t my person.” Leah hugged Meredith, but her belly was hilariously in the way. “So, when are you due? You’re huge!”

Apparently people still thought it polite to say ‘you’re huge’ to a pregnant woman – or ask if it’s twins. “Not until September.”

“You look amazing,” she assured her friend. “How’s Jacob?”

“Good –“

“Oh my God!” Meredith cried, grabbing Leah’s left hand. “Are you… engaged!? You were not engaged the last time I saw you.”

Leah laughed, “No, it happened after the wedding.”

“I can’t believe you’re getting married! And pregnant. I feel… old,” she mused.

“Tell me about it,” she checked her phone. “I’ve ‘gotta go, duty calls.”

The girls parted and promised to get together soon – Leah actually asked her to her baby shower the weekend before stepping into the shop which was filled with visitors. She threw her name tag on and was greeted happily by Embry’s mom, Tiffany.

“I’m so glad you’re here, it’s been busy all morning.”

“That’s good news, though.”

“If it wasn’t just me on, yep,” she said happily. 

The girls exchanged small talk as they worked, helping customers locate product and checking them out. Leah never thought anyone would want a ‘La Push’ keychain. After all, she lived there, and it was okay at best more often than not. If she was doing a vacation? Hawaii for sure. Or at least somewhere warm. The day passed quickly, though, and soon, she was off – for good, and home in the tub with Jacob rubbing her feet.

“Long afternoon?”

“It was only four hours.”

“Yeah, I know, but your feet are so swollen it may as well have been eight.”

“Well I’m not working anymore until the baby comes, so I can soak in the tub and enjoy my huge belly. Oh – Meredith is still here. She’s coming to the baby shower next weekend. Caleb and her broke up.”

“Good.”

“That’s what I said.”

Thankfully, the rest of the week went by uneventfully. She had another ultrasound – with just Carlisle this time and he confirmed what he had all along – a September delivery and a healthy baby, and they got updated pictures that they put on the fridge when they got home. Before she knew it, it was Saturday, July 28th - and it was baby shower time.

Emily waddled in, due any day now, followed by Kim, Rachel, Meredith, and all the guys accumulating out back. A few of Jacob’s relatives were there, as well as her mom, some of her friends from work, and the pack’s mothers along with some of her extended family. It was still smaller than a big shower, but it was exhausting nonetheless trying to make conversation with everyone.

The guys were all out back having their joined diaper parties with their dads and some family members and Leah finally got a minute to sit on the couch and sighed in relief. 

“Tiring, huh?” Emily laughed beside her, her fingers gingerly running over her belly.

“Exhausting,” she agreed.

“Present time!” Sue called as everyone gathered in the living room and Leah was transferred to a big armchair. 

Baby gifts had to be the cutest things ever.

As Leah opened gift after gift, she was reminded just how small and fragile the child inside of her was going to be – despite everyone telling her how big she was. She got a bassinet, lots of clothes, baby essentials like wipes, cream, bath stuff, toys, bibs, swaddling blankets, teethers, a baby gate, safety latches, a pad for the dresser for changing the baby on, a travel system from her mom, baby monitors, bottling and nursing gear, teddy bears, carriers, a play mat, a play pen… the list went on. When it was over, she was awed at just how much they had gotten.

“Thank you all so much, it’s amazing, honestly. I can’t even express how much we appreciate you all being here and how grateful our little guy will be with all of this stuff.”

She didn’t have to buy anything else – it was all accounted for (minus the crib mattress which she had since ordered). 

Everyone expressed how happy they were to have helped and she felt really excited and as though, for once, the baby was loved more than viewed as unexpected. The guys stayed out back all afternoon and finally, it was only Sam’s mom, Emily’s mom, Sue, Emily, and Rachel left. Even Meredith and Anna had shown up and spread their congratulations.

“That was exhausting,” Leah laughed. Emily smiled, but a weird twinge of pain crossed her face. “Are you okay?”

“Fine,” she said, forcing a smile. “Just more Braxton hicks. They’re getting pretty annoying.”

The mom’s helped clean up and gossiped together in the kitchen and Leah, Emily, and Rachel stayed in the living room, picking through the gifts and pointing out how freaking adorable they were – and how Jacob and Seth were going to have a full night bringing everything up in the nursery for her to organize.

The Cullen’s stopped by after everyone had left, wanting to give Leah some space, but as soon as Bella, Rosalie, and Renesmee stepped into the room, their eyes were wide. “You have so much stuff,” Renesmee said suddenly.

Leah laughed, “Yeah, it seems so.”

“Any names picked out yet?” Bella asked as they all sat down and she shifted through the baby stuff.

“Not yet – we’ve narrowed it down though.”

“You better decide soon,” Rosalie murmured. “Your belly is close to fully grown by the look of it.”

“I’ll see Carlisle later the week, but he said last week I’m still on trajectory for September.”

“Was I this small?” Renesmee asked, pulling out a tiny jumper.

Bella smiled, but Rosalie answered. “Yep. You were so tiny.”

“Very tiny,” Leah confirmed.

It occurred to her then that Leah had been around her whole life, too. It was a weird thought – like she should have realized it before but hadn’t because of the strained relationship. She smiled, “I guess small feels relative when you have to give birth, though.” She didn’t mean any harm by it, but Leah squirmed at the thought.

The girls continued to exchange small talk until Renesmee ventured out to the backyard to see the guys all hanging around – dad’s having left, just the pack there, drinking beer.

“Can I have one?” She asked, going up beside Jacob.

He laughed, “Not a chance, Ness.”

“Oh, come on, I’m practically thirty.”

“You’re not even a year old,” Embry teased. “So… no.”

Renesmee sighed dramatically, “Fine. You guys have all the fun yourselves.”

“How’s everything inside?” Jacob asked.

“Good – you guys have a lot of stuff.” She looked to the pile of diapers across the yard. “And a lot of diapers. Do babies really go through that many?”

Sam laughed nearby, “Apparently so.”

“Is it weird yet?”

“What do you mean?”

“All of that baby stuff… it’s for your baby. Is it strange?”

Jacob shrugged, “I’m sure it will be later when I see it all with Leah and realize I don’t know what half of it’s for,” he joked.

“Nah, you’ll be fine,” Quil said coming over from talking to Paul. “Just change diapers, feed it, bathe it, and cuddle it. Claire was a super easy baby.”

Renesmee smiled, “Mom said I was, too.”

“To be fair, you were practically walking when your mother woke up,” Jacob pointed out, causing her to pout. He chuckled and nudged her playfully, but she wasn’t amused – she hated him seeing her as a kid still.

Not long after, around dinnertime, Emily cringed. “Rach? Can you get Sam?” She whispered to her friend when Leah went to the restroom.

Panic crossed Rachel’s face – she had been reading up a lot about babies including the delivery since trying to get pregnant herself and considering all of her friends practically were pregnant. Emily’s tone, the way she closed her eyes to breath slowly through what looked like pain the last couple of hours, and her radiating nerves spoke loud and clear. “I’m on it,” she said, going out back. “Sam?”

Her own voice sounded as urgent as Emily’s face looked and immediately, Sam appeared taking in Rachel’s frazzled state. “Is everything okay?”

“I think Emily’s in labor.”

Sam pushed past Rachel and went inside just as Leah took Emily’s hand. “Is it time?”

Emily looked up to him and shook her head, “Not yet – but they’re getting worse. I thought they were just Braxton Hicks this morning, but I’ve been timing them the past hour and they’re getting closer together – and more painful.”

“Let’s get you home-“

Sue came out then, hearing the commotion, along with Emily and Sam’s mom’s. “Everything okay?”

“Emily’s in labor,” Leah said as Emily took another contraction and she cringed in pain.

Emily’s mom was at her other side instantly, but Sue was the one who spoke. “How far apart?”

“About ten minutes.”

Sam ran a hand through his hair and Leah could feel his nerves filling the room as his face paled. Sue went to get Emily a damp, cool face cloth to keep her calm and her mom kissed her hair, trying to soothe her. Leah got up off the couch beside Emily and took Sam’s hand, steering him away for a minute.

When she was out of Emily’s hearing – just as the guys started coming inside to make sure things were okay, she dropped his hand. “Deep breaths, okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost. This is good, right? Your baby will be here soon. Emily’s going to be fine – she’s so strong. You’ll have your little girl in your arms sooner than you can imagine – focus on that.” She knew their imprint caused a lot of amplified feelings for Sam right now. Emily was in pain and scared and he really couldn’t do much about it – but he had to pull it together, his own pain from the imprint needed to be pushed aside.

He took a breath, and nodded, giving her a weak but thankful smile. “You’re right, I just-“

“You just nothing” she cut him off, giving him a reassuring smile. “You’re going to be a dad soon. Go hold her and tell her it’ll be okay and that you’ll feed her ice chips the entire time – and if she breaks anything the wolf-speed will heal you right up so she can squeeze as hard as she has to.”

The pep talk was surprising coming from Leah, but she saw his face moments ago and knew he needed to clam it to help Emily. Allison had went out into their car and gotten the hospital bag to bring in just in case Emily needed anything, but when she came back, she went right for her son – just as he hugged Leah.

Leah hugged him back before releasing him.

“Thank you,” he whispered before pulling back and going over to Emily – Allison putting a hand on his shoulder as he walked back just after she gave Leah a thankful smile. 

Jacob came up behind her and smiled, “You ‘gonna give me the same pep talk?”

“Not a chance,” she smirked. “You just heard it – and if you pass out, I’ll kill you.”

He snorted, “Not ‘gonna happen. I’ve seen Bella give birth, remember? That was way more gruesome - I think I’ll be fine. Speak of the devil!”

The Cullen’s approached cautiously, “We’re gonna head off and give you some privacy.”

“Let me know how Emily makes out,” Renesmee said to Jacob as her mom put a hand on her shoulder and Rosalie looked over her shoulder at Emily breathing on the couch, Sam now crouched in front of her, her hands in his whispering sweet nothings to her despite his own fears. No doubt, the blond was wishing herself in that pain right now if it meant in hours, she would have her own little one to hold and Leah caught her gaze before she turned back, giving her a small smile that Rosalie returned coldly – though this time it wasn’t because of their different genetics; she was just hurting.

“Will do – thanks for coming,” Jacob said again, reaching out to give Bella a hug, and then Renesmee, who missed Jacob’s arms more than she would admit. When he let her go, he turned to Rosalie and grinned, realizing, too, her wistfulness and wanting to improve her mood for once. “I didn’t expect to see you here; Emmett finally threw you to the wolves, huh?”

Rosalie laughed dryly despite herself, but Leah responded. “Rosalie gave us a really cute onesie, actually.”

Jacob’s brow furrowed, and Leah went over, grabbing the bag and removing the light blue onesie. It had ‘Alpha in training’ on it in black lettering with three wolves howling to the moon. She showed it to Jacob, then showed him a darker blue one that said, ‘My parents are wolves – don’t mess with me.’

Jacob couldn’t help but to grin, and he dropped the taunts surfacing in his mind and actually reached out, surprising them all, and hugged Rosalie. “Thanks, blondie, maybe you’re not so bad after all.”

Rosalie was visibly awkward, and her nose perked at the scent, but hugged him back before they pulled away. “You’re welcome – but it’s for the baby, not you,” she said, smirking.

“Well the baby is half me,” Jacob shrugged. “So ‘kinda mine, right?”

“Only if you can fit into the onesie.”

“What size is it, Lee?”

Leah laughed and they all rolled their eyes as they heard Emily groan. “That’s our cue,” Bella said before gesturing for the two girls to follow her out. Renesmee was about to turn before she jumped into Jacob’s arms again, wrapping her them around him. Leah exchanged and awkward glance with Bella before Renesmee let go. “Let me know when you’re coming, okay?”

“Will do, Ness,” Jacob returned easily. 

When they left, Leah turned to Jacob and sighed, “That was weird.”

He shrugged, “At least the onesies are adorable.”

The guys had all gone back outside realizing that Emily didn’t need the pack’s support right now. Rachel had followed Paul out, too, not wanting to step on toes. Leah kissed Jacob before he went back outside and Leah returned to her mom’s side in the living room with Sam, Emily, and their moms. 

“Just breathe through it,” Emily’s mom kept saying.

“I’m trying,” Emily snapped, extremely uncharacteristically. 

“About nine minutes apart,” Sue said informatively. “Why don’t you lie down and try to get some rest? You can take my room – the hospital won’t admit you until your water break or until they’re five minutes apart.”

They all decided it was a good idea and Sam helped Emily upstairs, thanking Sue before the mom’s started calling family to let them know it was time – and Leah went back outside with the guys and Rachel.

“Show time?” Rachel asked.

“She’s resting for now, with Sam.”

“Well, I think your baby is going to take over the entire house with all the gear inside,” Seth teased. “Maybe I will have to ask Abigail to take me in.”

Leah laughed as Jacob snaked an arm around her waist, pulling her close. “Downstairs is a baby-free zone for your sanity, as agreed.”

“A whole one room,” Seth teased.

“You didn’t seem to mind the privacy of your one room last night when Abigail stayed over – or did you think I didn’t notice?”

Seth turned visibly red, and the guys started teasing him.

“That was mean,” Jacob laughed.

“He deserved it.”

Sue brought the food from inside out in the backyard so everyone could get something to eat and not long after, Emily and Sam left for the hospital with their moms and lots of well wishes and promises to call with updates.

“Emily better tell me everything,” Leah said later that evening when everyone but her mom had left. Charlie had come over after work and helped Jacob and Seth bring everything up to the nursery and help set up some of the things she got. He reminded her of her dad more than ever, and it made her heart clench with love and despair.

“I’m sure she will,” Jacob promised. “Rebecca’s due soon, too, so you’ll have lots of information – probably too much.”

“Hopefully – Rosalie said my belly looks pretty well there.”

“Rosalie’s not a doctor – trust me, they don’t let airheads operate.”

Leah hit Jacob’s chest playfully at the jab. “The gift she gave us was adorable. She even found a wolf sweater and a pacifier with a wolf on it. Very thoughtful.”

“I didn’t say she was unthoughtful,” he pointed out. “Just that I wouldn’t trust her to operate. She couldn’t handle Bella giving birth.”

“Okay, ‘giving birth’ may be putting Bella’s situation mildly considering Edward ate her entire stomach to get Renesmee out.”

Jacob cringed at the mental image, “Don’t remind me. You’re going naturally, though, in another month or so, without my teeth coming near your stomach.”

Leah laughed, “Deal – and you’re going to be at my head the entire time, right?”

He chuckled, “Yes, the entire time.”

They spent the rest of the evening cleaning up and putting away the gifts. The baby had a full closet of clothing, a nursery that was now full except for a crib mattress, and lots of diapers. When everything was finally situated, Leah retired to their bedroom with Jacob and fell on the bed in exhaustion, but sleep was a faraway thought as soon as their lips came together.

Sam called everyone only twenty hours later, overjoyed at the birth of their little girl – Grace Uley. Mom and baby were fine and able to come home three days later. When Leah went over to visit as soon as she could, practically waddling and saw Emily cradling a small bundle against her chest in the living room.

It was the first time since she had given birth that she was alone – Sam had actually left her to go get some groceries and she was overjoyed to see her old friend in a rather quiet house. Leah had put a casserole Sue sent her with in the fridge for them – after all, you could never go anywhere empty handed as Sue Clearwater’s spawn.

“Okay – spill. Everything. Every. Little. Detail,” Leah said as she sat beside Emily. The girls laughed and Emily shuffled the blanket around Grace to let Leah see her perfect little face. Like every woman seeing a newborn baby ever, Leah fawned over the precious tiny human and Emily let her hold her. 

“It’ll be your little one soon,” Emily pointed out.

“I can’t believe he’ll be this tiny.”

“She’s six pounds, eight ounces. Or was when she was born. She’s gone down a little but they say that’s normal and to keep trying to get their weight back up, but I’ve been having a lot of trouble getting her to latch. Sam’s gone to get formula to try to supplement what she is getting from me.”

“I’m sorry, Em,” Leah said, knowing how much she had wanted to breastfeed.

She shrugged, “Nothing we can do about it now but make sure she’s not hungry one way or another.”

Leah rocked the small, sleeping baby and smiled adoringly before looking back to Emily. “Okay – spill it, seriously.”

Emily laughed, “There isn’t much to spill – not much that will help you, probably, anyways. I had to get a c-section because I stopped dilating at five centimeters and wouldn’t go any further. They tried everything, but then Grace’s blood pressure dropped so they did an emergency c-section.”

“Scary.”

“You’re telling me.”

“Are you sore?”

“Very, but Sam’s been great and is helping a lot. The public health nurse has been by, too, so she’s been really helpful.”

“Well, honestly, I’m kind of disappointed I don’t get the inside scoop here,” Leah teased.

“Well, I can tell you all about a c-section just in case?”

“I’m all ears.” Honestly, being cut open almost seemed preferable to the alternative.

Another ultrasound came along August 7th. As Carlisle moved the wand around – having come alone this time, Billy and Sue looked in awe. Jacob had finally convinced Billy to attend since there wasn’t going to be a whole lot more time left, and Sue had asked to come along, too. Carlisle pointed out all of the baby’s parts – legs, arms, head, and both grandparents were rendered speechless – except for a few tears that spilled down Sue’s face that Leah ignored in efforts to not start crying herself.

Carlisle wiped her belly off and then handed her the new pictures. Her ultrasound photos filled the fridge, now, but she felt better knowing everything was okay. “Any questions, nan and pop?”

Sue looked to Billy and wiped her cheeks, “How much longer?”

“She’s about thirty-two weeks, now,” he observed, washing his hands. “I’d say early to mid-September is a very good bet.”

“It’s so soon,” Leah said, as Jacob kissed her forehead. 

“The sooner the better – once you’re full term, right? Then we get to meet our little man.”

Leah smiled at the thought, but the fear of giving birth didn’t leave her. “You’ll be around, right?”

“I’ll come back with Esme when Jacob does and we’ll stick around until the delivery,” Carlisle promised.

Jacob was leaving next week to go see Renesmee to satisfy the imprint before the baby was born and although she still didn’t like it, she had to trust him.

“It’s only for four days, it’ll fly by” he promised her, guessing her fears. “Then I’ll be back here with you to greet the newest Black addition.” 

He kissed her engagement ring and she smiled, nodding. “You better be.”


	23. The Birth

Jacob was leaving in the morning and now that it was so close Leah was having a hard time stomaching it. She had a million worries going through her mind. What if he didn’t think she was attractive anymore now that she was swollen and pregnant? What if the imprint kicked up a notch and he noticed how attractive Renesmee was – much thinner and sexier than her right now, and probably more pleasant?

He could tell she was in her head and he knew what was bugging her without asking. They were watching a movie with Seth, Abigail, Embry, and his girlfriend, Casey, and although her eyes were on the screen, they were glazed over as though she hadn’t heard a word in the last twenty minutes. 

“Hey,” Jacob whispered, nudging her gently. “I won’t be gone long.”

She looked up at him on the couch, his arms wrapped around her, and put on a brave smile. “I know.”

“I’ll be back before you know it. You have nothing to worry about, okay?”

She nodded, turning her attention back to the TV. He knew Embry and Seth could hear them because of their wolf hearing but the girls seemed pretty focused on the movie.

“’Wanna get some more popcorn, Lee?” He said, loud enough for everyone to hear.

She looked up to him, brow furrowed, but understood his motive. “Sure.”

They both got up – as Embry called for more candy, too, and went into the kitchen, putting a new bag of popcorn in the microwave. Jacob cornered her against the island, resting his hands on her hips. “What’s bugging you?”

“You already know.”

“And I’ve already told you not to worry.”

Leah hesitated before sighing, “What if the imprint… I don’t know, changes? She’s a much more… attractive option right now than me,” she gestured to her large belly.

“You’re beautiful,” he said automatically, believing every word. “You’ve got our baby in there. That’s pretty hot.”

“I don’t feel hot.”

Jacob studied her for a moment before leaning in and kissing her heatedly. The others couldn’t see them, thankfully, and as the popcorn started to pop, their lips locked, he reached down and took her hand, placing it strategically over his groin which was reacting immediately to her touch.

“Jake,” Leah chastised him, pulling back, her eyes lit with wonder. “What are you-“

“I think you’re incredibly sexy, see?”

She smirked, shaking her head at him. It worked to improve her mood slightly, and the way he looked at her then made her feel silly for doubting his feelings – the imprint just constantly loomed over her whether she wanted it to or not and being so uncomfortable right now didn’t help her self-esteem. “I can’t wait to get this baby out.”

“And I can’t wait to meet the little guy.”

The popcorn slowed and Leah squirmed from his touch before putting it in a bowl and going back out on the couch, throwing Embry another bag of candy, the popcorn in her lap. Seth and Abigail were on the love seat and lip-locked when they came back, which Seth quickly broke when Leah came back in. Imprint or not, she was still his sister and it was weird. Embry and Casey had plopped down on the floor on some cushions and leaned against the back of the couch. Leah curled back into Jacob and before she knew it, she felt his hand slip under the blanket and brush against her thigh.

She eyed him, and he gave her his infamous goofy grin and turned back to the movie as his hand continued to explore – and slip under her leggings. She didn’t say anything in efforts to not alert anyone – she knew it was wrong, they were with their friends and her brother! But… as his fingers started exploring new territory, she succumbed to his touch and bit her lower lip, shifting the popcorn to cover the moving blanket. 

It only took a second for him to slip his finger underneath her thong and since she was already turned on beyond belief from his taunting, he slipped a finger into her. She didn’t make a sound, but she took a deep breath and closed her eyes as he moved inside of her, his thumb rubbing against her most sensitive nerve endings. She stayed quiet with much effort as he continued and when she felt her body tense, he removed his hand and she opened her eyes, brow furrowed, shooting him daggers which he returned with the same lazy smile.

Oh, that’s how he wanted to play this.

Leah shifted a little and managed to undo the button of his jeans under the blanket, slipping her hand inside his boxers. She found him hard from his own exploration and she wrapped her hand around him, moving slowly and tauntingly, her eyes focused on the TV although she could feel Jacob’s gaze on her.

It wasn’t until Jacob’s breath caught that she stopped and removed her hand, just as Embry gave them a weary glance. Luckily, the movie was almost over and they both sat in a puddle of their lust until the credits started to roll.

“I’m exhausted,” Leah faked a yawn. “Time for bed. You coming, Jake?” The words were dripping with an innuendo, and Jacob tried to hide his grin.

“He’s coming alright,” Embry teased, earning a groan from Seth.

“Night, guys,” Jacob said, ignoring his friend as he disappeared upstairs with Leah. 

When they got to her room, he gently pushed her against the door and started kissing her. His hands moved to the end of her shirt and pulled it up, over her head before also shedding her bra and Leah worked on his shirt before both of their hands went to one another’s pants. Once they were off – Jake’s boxers following and her thong ripped (again), he moved from the door to avoid too much noise and pinned her against the wall with his body, loving their height similarity. He pushed inside of her, evoking a muffled cry from the she-wolf that was music to his ears.

He moved in her, their bodies on fire from the build-up. Before, Leah would have easily wrapped her legs around his waist and he could have held her up – like against the tree, and at the cliffs, but now with her belly, it was hard enough to kiss during sex when they were face-to-face. 

Jacob’s hands went to her chest and played with her nipples and Leah felt her legs grow weak underneath her as she hit her climax. She practically fell against him, her body thrashing, and she felt him, too, quicken his pace before he hit his own release. He pulled out of her a minute later and leaned in to kiss her lips gently.

They didn’t say anything, but he took her hand and led her to the bed. They crawled under the covers and she cuddled into his chest as he stroked her hair. “It’s been a while since we’ve been adventurous, huh?”

“If by adventurous you mean dangerous and incredibly obvious, then yeah.”

He chuckled as she yawned for real this time. “Get some sleep.”

“Jake?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m not sure how I got so lucky.”

He kissed her forehead, still smoothing her hair. “Me either.”

Jacob left the following morning and Leah pouted a little as he kissed her goodbye. “I’ll be back before you know it.”  
“Don’t have too much fun.”

“Without you? Impossible.”

“Be safe. I love you.”

“You, too.”  
Still tired, once Jacob left, Leah laid back down and fell quickly into a peaceful sleep. About an hour later, though, she woke up with a dull ache in her lower back that was a little worse than normal. Rolling out of bed, she decided to run a lukewarm bath to ease the discomfort.

After soaking for a half an hour, the pain was only getting worse. It felt like someone was sitting on her lower back and she barely got out of the tub by herself, considering her rather round tummy. Once she was out, dried off, and dressed, she heard familiar voices downstairs and decided to distract herself. The pain wasn't getting any worse now, but it was still there, accompanied by the familiar feeling of her good friend lately, Braxton hicks. Sex always made them worse.

Emily and Sam were downstairs with Seth, cooing over the small infant in the carrier. They greeted her when she came down and Emily immediately asked if she wanted to hold Grace.

"I'm going to have to pass this time," she said uneasily, lowering herself awkwardly into the adjacent armchair.

"How are you feeling?" Sam asked curiously.

"Not great. My lower back is killing me, and the Braxton hicks are bad today. That, and Jake left this morning to see Renesmee to soothe the imprint so he would be here closer to my due date."

"Not long now," Emily said happily, trying to shift her friends focus off Jacob and his imprint.

"I can't wait to get this baby out," she agreed, grinning. “It’s… getting pretty difficult to do routine things, that’s for sure.”

“Sam had to put my socks on at the end of it,” Emily laughed. “So, I hear ‘ya.” She looked down at her little girl, though, and smiled brightly. “But I promise it’s all worth it.”

Leah grinned adoringly as she watched Emily with the little girl and nodded, even more excited for their little guy to come. They talked for about an hour, Emily rocked Grace, and as her back pain started getting more intense, she excused herself to the bathroom. It felt like everything was starting to push down onto her southern regions. A few minutes later, she came back out and sat next to Sam on the couch. He had Grace, now, and Emily was heating up a bottle for her. 

Emily reappeared with the bottle a few minutes later as Leah watched Sam with Grace. She couldn’t wait to see Jacob with their little guy. Emily handed Sam the bottle and Grace latched on quickly.

“Switched to bottle feeding?” Leah asked.

Emily frowned, “My milk wouldn’t come in. She wasn’t getting enough and she was always hungry and fussing so we tried her on formula and she’s like a new baby.”

“Fed is best,” Leah repeated the saying she heard a million times at the prenatal class she went to at her mom’s work. Rachel went with her last week because Jacob had to work on some cars.

Suddenly, Leah felt the pressure from earlier grow, and she felt a popping sensation and some of the pressure relieved, a warm feeling spreading over her lower half. She squirmed a little, and then Sam carefully stood up with Grace. “Leah…”

Leah looked down as soon as she felt the warmth spreading; her grey sweatpants were damp with liquid, and underneath her. She felt her cheeks flush immediately. “I’m sorry…” The liquid managed to get on Sam’s jeans, and all over the couch. Her bladder, considering her large tummy and growing baby, was finicky, but she never actually had any bathroom emergencies before now. Leah stood up, wanting to go hide in the bathroom and clean herself up, and suddenly felt a huge gush as water covered the floor beneath her.

“Your water just broke,” Emily said suddenly, springing up as well.

“It’s too early,” Leah said, unable to move, in shock.

“Seth, go grab a towel,” Sam instructed, Grace having just finished her bottle, and put her in her carrier.

Seth was clearly shocked, too, and Sam repeated his words again before the younger Clearwater sprang into action.

“Deep breaths,” Sam said, seeing the terror spreading over Leah’s face. She would have been amused at the role reversal here if it wasn’t for her sudden incapacity to think.

Seth came back a moment later with towels and he dropped one under Leah, on the floor. Emily, thankfully, cleaned it up, and Sam instructed Seth to put another on the nearby exercise ball and then helped Leah down onto it. Her breathing was quickly growing labored, even if the painful contractions hadn’t started – she was scared. She felt the rest of the water leaking out but couldn’t find it in her to worry about her own embarrassment right now – Jacob. She had to call Jacob.

“I need my phone,” she said finally. Seth retrieved it off the couch and she dialed Jacob’s number quickly. No answer. Fucking perfect. The next number she tried was her moms’ cell, but it was off - she must be at work. She even tried Charlie’s house but got voicemail. She was about to call the police station, but she tried the hospital as her second last attempt and got hold of the nurse’s station.

"Is Sue Clearwater there?"

"One moment please." It felt like forever until the nurse came back and she idly started bouncing on the ball, feeling more water seep into the towel and her pants.

"Hello? Yes, Sue is in surgery. She has another 5 hours."

"Well she's going to need coverage. Tell her that her daughter's water just broke."

"Oh my. Okay. It may be an hour or so before I can get her relieved though, I'll do my best."

Leah hung up and tried Jacob again but it went to voicemail.

Fuck!

She immediately turned to Seth.

"You have to drive me to the hospital." She didn’t know Carlisle’s number – Jacob was always the go-between for them and without being able to contact him, she knew the only other place she could turn to for medical advice was her mom’s work and she hoped that the baby was as normal as Carlisle promised it would be to avoid any suspicion.

"I can't drive! I only have my permit!" Cue Seth freaking out.

"Well I can't either, considering Niagara Falls just decided to grace me.”

"I'll drive you," Sam said suddenly.

She exchanged a look between her, Emily, and Grace, and shook her head. "You need to be home-"

"You need to go to the hospital," Emily said firmly. "I'm perfectly fine with her myself. Go with Sam."

"I'll phase and try to track Jacob down," Seth jumped up and out the door thankful to be out of the room but still be of help.

"Get your bag," Emily said.

"I... I don’t have it ready!"

"What, why not?"

"I was supposed to have another 3 weeks at least!"

"Okay," Sam went over and took Leah's hands, a little panicked himself that Jacob couldn’t be located. He had tried him, too. "Go upstairs and grab the essentials - a change of clothes and toiletries. I'll get Grace strapped in the car. Emily can help you and then I'll drop them home and bring you to the hospital. Your mom should be out of surgery by then. Okay? Breathe. I'll keep calling Jacob."

Sam calmed her, surprisingly, and she nodded, turning, and going upstairs after he helped her off the ball and gave her the towel to keep with her. Emily kissed Sam thankfully before kissing Grace and then following Leah.

Leah grabbed a duffel bag and started to fill it up with clothes when Emily came in. "Okay, no," she took the jean's Leah was putting in the bag from her. "You need sweatpants and pajama pants. You probably won't want to put jean's on."

"Okay, okay," she was grateful for Emily's expertise and emptied her bag before putting in a few pairs of pajama pants and a new pair of sweatpants, barely able to think straight. She threw in some tank tops and t-shirts, and a sweater and Emily grabbed her toiletries. She felt a painful wave come over her as she zipped the bag closed and Emily grabbed her arm as she doubled over, putting her hands on her bed to support her.

"First real contraction?"

Leah exhaled and nodded. "Fairly worse than the Braxton but not terrible. Yet."

"Ready to go?"

“I need to change…”

“No use,” Emily said softly. “They broke my water at the hospital, but it still… well, leaked for a while. You’re only going to ruin more pants and they’re going to gown you as soon as you get there anyways.”

“I can’t get in your car like this!”

“I’ll grab another towel.”

Emily had finally gotten Leah to move when she stopped again. "The car seat... it's in Jacob's rabbit at Billy’s. Paul needed it yesterday, so we left it there overnight. Oh, God, Emily the crib mattress isn’t even here yet…” She was rambling, but she couldn’t help voicing all of the fears that were springing – out of control, to the forefront of her mind right now.

"Breathe," she repeated Sam's words prior. "The bassinet is over in the corner,” she gestured to the bassinet that Rachel had gotten them for her baby shower. “That's all you need for now. I'll get Sam to stop and pick the car seat up. You can let Billy and Rachel know then, too, and maybe Paul can go and help Seth locate Jacob." No one but Jacob knew the Cullen’s new address because they really didn’t need to. 

"If he misses this because he's with her..." Another ache stopped her mid sentence, causing her to cringe, but Emily got the picture. "I can’t do this alone."

"You won't be. Sam won't leave until your mom gets there okay?" She nodded hesitantly before Emily grabbed her bag and nursing pillow. "Come on, let's go."

Emily helped Leah downstairs and into the car, trying to keep her calm as she voiced her worry about it being too early. She wasn't too far off full term though and a week for her pregnancy could have meant a lot more than they realized. She was thirty-two weeks last week but could have spiralled to thirty-eight for all they knew. Her stomach was a lot bigger. Emily tried to keep her calm by telling her that, but it was a lost cause.

"Did you get hold of him?" Leah asked as she got in the car. Sam started it and shook his head. "No, just voicemail. Keep calling him while I drive."

She did. And got voicemail every time. The worst ran through her mind; was he ok? Was he with Renesmee? And if he was, was he with Renesmee? Her mind was running crazy, and a part of her knew he would never do that, not now, but it was still a rouge thought that continued to slip through every time she got his voicemail. She groaned as another contraction hit when they dropped Emily off. Emily wished her luck and got Grace inside before Sam stopped by Billy's.

Sam went in and told Billy. Rachel came flying out moments later and Leah briefly saw Paul phase and start running - off to find Jake, as Sam grabbed the keys of the rabbit and took the car seat out.

“I’m coming,” Rachel said quickly.

"Seriously its early... you don't have to-"

"I want to-“

“Rachel, it could be hours before I go into full labor – stay home, I’ll call, I promise.” 

She frowned, “Fine, do you need anything?”

"Jacob," she sighed.

"I know, Paul's gone to look, too." Sam got back in, with the car seat thrown in the trunk, and Rachel kissed her cheek before going back in with her dad, waiting for the word to go to the hospital.

The ride over was quiet. Other than her soft groans when a contraction hit and Sam ensuring she was okay they didn't say much, and the silence let her mind wander way too much. When they finally got to the hospital, she was grateful.

Sam helped her out and grabbed her bag and she had a weird sense of Déjà vu on how she pictured this day before. However, the only guy she wanted right now was Jacob. And he was still not picking up.

Sam brought her into emergency, asked for Sue and told them what was going on and was quickly ushered into a room - where her mom was already.

"How close together are the contractions?" Sue asked.

"I don't know-"

"About fifteen minutes," Sam stated. It wasn't his first rodeo and it occurred to her he had been quiet on the way over because he had been timing them. She gave him a thankful look as another, more intense contraction came over her. They got her up, into the bed and the OBGYN came in. The next few minutes happened so fast. She was gowned, checked, and an IV was inserted. Once that was done, they told her to wait a little before the epidural until she was farther along, or the pain got worse. She would have been sent home until the contractions were only five minutes apart, if her water hadn’t of already broke.

Sue put a cold cloth on Leah's forehead and Sam came back in, having left while they got her situated, and hovered in the doorway. He couldn't leave her - not until Jacob got there.

"Did you get hold of him?" Leah asked again before squeezing her eyes shut, another contraction hitting.

Sam frowned and shook his head. "No, I'm sorry Lee-Lee."

The old nickname would have made her furious months ago but now, it soothed her. He sat in the armchair on the opposite side of her from where Sue was and took her other hand. "I'll stay until he gets here, okay? Seth and Paul will catch his scent and follow the trail.”

Leah gulped and nodded, squeezing his hand in thanks. "Well, not exactly how I pictured this, yet kind of was."

Sam chuckled and sat back, knowing exactly what she meant.  
The next three hours were exhausting. She walked the hallways with both her mother and Sam, paced the floor of her hospital room as the contractions began to wrack her entire body with agony, and ended up on the floor on her hands and knees to try to eliminate some of the pressure, though it was futile. Plus, nurses came and went sporadically, checking her progress and vitals and ensuring she was feeling okay. More people than she could count had been up her gown by now and she didn’t even care anymore.

Contractions picked up significantly at the three-hour mark, and when the pain got really bad she got back in bed, feeling nauseous. “Mom, I’m going to be sick,” she groaned, hating that Sam was here to see this, and that Jacob wasn’t. Sue held the bucket for her and smoothed her hair and after, continued to feed her ice chips and put cold cloths on her forehead once the old ones got warm. “I need an epidural. Now.”

Sue nodded and paged the nurse immediately, not wanting to leave Leah’s side. The anesthesiologist came quickly and introduced himself, but Leah barely heard his name, because another contraction hit, and she felt her eyes well with tears. Sue helped her up, and the anesthesiologist assumed Sam was the father. He instructed Leah to lean on him while he inserted the epidural catheter. Sam obliged, wanting to help, but the irony of the entire situation wasn't lost on either of them.

After the epidural took away most of the pain, she finally got some sleep, and awoke to Seth.

"Is Jacob here?" She asked groggily. Her mom had just stepped out to get something to eat and it was just Sam and Seth.

"No, sorry Lee. Paul took Jared and Embry and told me to come back. Said I should be here. When I left, they were on his trail though. Did you not have the Cullen’s address? Or phone numbers?”

She hesitated, realizing she should have, but shook her head. “Never needed to. Jake had it, and I had Jake’s number and assumed he’d answer his stupid phone.” Leah sighed, laying back in bed as another contraction hit. Even with the epidural she cringed with the contracting motion and exhaled gratefully when it was over. "If he doesn't get back here by the time this baby is out, I’m going to kill him."

They had been promising her thus far that he would be there, but they still had no concrete proof and every minute he wasn’t there was a minute closer to her having to push. Seth stayed up with his mom when Sue came back, by Leah's head, and Sam was on the other side, both taking her hand during a contraction. She wasn't sure what she would do without them. Unfortunately, the next time the doctor checked her, she was 1cm away from pushing and they cut back her epidural. She wasn’t sure how long she had been there, but now, it felt like it wasn’t long enough as fear welled up in her.

"I can't do this without him," Leah said suddenly, her voice breaking.

"You can," Sam promised. "Squeeze my hand as tight as you can. I'm not going anywhere."

"Thank you for being here... I know you don’t have to be. I appreciate it."

Sam gave her a warm smile before another contraction hit and she groaned. She could see her stomach moving with each contraction, and it made her a little nauseous. She still had her IV, blood pressure cuff, and fetal monitor attached to her, as well as the epidural catheter in her back and her bladder, and she felt like a human pincushion but barely had time to think about everything hooked up to her with her increasing fear of Jacob being MIA during this and the constant contractions.

Another half hour ticked by and she felt the pressure growing unbearable. “I need to push,” she said through gritted teeth, another contraction tensing her entire body. It wasn’t necessarily as painful as before the epidural, but she could still feel the extreme discomfort and pressure building – and the urge to help their son make his appearance into the world, with or without his father.

Sue adjusted the hospital bed so that Leah was sat up. “I’ll get the nurse-“

Another contraction hit, and the urge was unstoppable. “I have to push now!”

Sue had already pressed the buzzer and took a deep breath. She was a good nurse – but being a nurse to her daughter wasn’t allowed, of course, and she was kind of glad because she was a little unnerved seeing Leah in so much pain, if she was being honest. It was easier when it was someone removed. “Okay, if you need to push, push. Listen to your body.”

Leah squeezed Sam’s hand tightly and pushed as hard as she could. It only lasted a few seconds, at the height of her contraction, and she didn’t make any headway, but the pressure felt a little more relieved for a short moment. The OBGYN came quickly and when she got checked this time, she was confirmed ready. She was rushed into labor and delivery and Sue and Sam gowned up to go in. It was funny how things worked out sometimes. She always thought Sam would be by her during this, but fate had a twisted sense of humor.

"Okay, Leah, I need you to take a deep breath and the next time you feel a contraction I need you to push."

Her feet were in the stirrups and she felt tears streaking her face as both her mom and Sam took opposite hands. "You can do this," Sue said reassuringly.

"You're the toughest woman I know," Sam encouraged. "Come on, Lee-Lee."

Another contraction hit, and she cried out as she arched her entire body up, bearing down. “Good, good, keep going,” the nurses coaxed her. “One more push, come on.”

The contractions were lasting a lot longer, giving her more time to push, and once it was over, she fell back, exhausted.

“Next contraction do the exact same thing, you’re doing great,” the nurse said softly, but before she could get the words out, Leah felt her body tense again and she pushed. It felt like she alternated between resting and pushing forever – despite the nurse’s continually telling her she was ‘close’, when finally, the doctor told her that she could see the baby’s head. Leah was exhausted, and Sam was by her side, smoothing her hair back as her mom gently wiped a cold cloth over her head and race ice chips over her lips to help.

She was getting ready to push again when the door burst open, and the familiar, chocolate eyes she had been desperately needing came into sight.

"Jacob!" She gasped happily, feeling more tears fall down her face.

"I'm so sorry," he apologized quickly having already been gowned and sterilized. "My phone fell out of my pocket... I didn't realize until Paul knocked on the Cullen's door. But I'm here now. Dad, Rachel, and Paul are out with Seth in the waiting room."

Sam got up to switch places with him, and Leah took his hand quickly. "I won't forget this," she promised. "Thank you."

He gave her a small smile before nodding, and Jacob thanked him before he took Sam's place. He kissed her passionately and cupped her cheek. "I'm here now. You can kick my ass later. Just breath, okay?"

How many more times were people going to tell her that?? "I've been breathing for the past-"

She cringed, feeling extreme discomfort, cutting off her words. It was overwhelming.

"Push, Leah! One big push and you’ll have his head out."

Jacob felt overwhelmed, having missed so much, but he took her hand firmly in his, and kissed her cheek. “Come on, Clearwater, let’s meet our son.”

She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, pushing as hard as she could. They told her his head was out, and now, she just had to push the shoulders out. She pushed a few more times, Jacob whispering sweet words into her ear the entire time as her body ached.

She took a deep breath and cried out in pain, sweat covering her face and chest, and she pushed again. Finally, moments later, she felt joyous relief.

"It’s a boy!” the doctor said happily, reaching up and placing a small bundle of flesh onto her chest. Immediately, she started sobbing, an overwhelming feeling of love coming over her. The nurses were around her, drying the baby off, and one of the nurses gently lowered the side of Leah’s gown so that they could have direct skin to skin contact, but kept them both covered with warm blankets. Her, Jacob, and Sue, took in every little aspect of the small child, and Leah couldn’t stop crying as his little eyelids squished together, having been introduced into the light of the world for the first time, and his lips twitched, limbs moving awkwardly as he tried to figure out what had happened and why his warm, dark home had vanished. She felt the doctors working, still, but couldn’t process anything but the small baby in her arms – their baby.

“Dad? Do you want to cut the cord?”

Leah had told Jacob a million times that she wanted him by her head at all times, but she saw the curiosity in his eyes and he nodded quickly, brushing the tears off his cheeks, before the doctor instructed him through cutting the cord. It pained him to leave Leah’s side, but he followed the doctor’s orders carefully and cut the cord. Once it was cut, the doctor gently removed the baby from Leah’s arms, telling her they had to do a vitals check, suction, and that they would wrap him in a blanket for her.

When they took him away, she felt empty, but it was only seconds before she heard him cry, causing more tears from her, Sue, and Jacob. 

“You did, it baby,” Sue said happily, kissing her daughters forehead. 

“You’re a grandmother,” Leah said happily, more tears flooding her cheeks as she smiled, before looking over to Jacob. “And we’re parents.”

“It’s surreal,” Jacob said softly before he leaned down to kiss her passionately. “You did absolutely amazing, Lee. That was incredible - you’re incredible.” His words only made her cry harder, between all the events of today and the hormones. 

"Congratulations to the happy parents - and grandmother. You have a very healthy little boy. He’s a little early, but he’s seven pounds and four ounces, and his vitals are very strong." The main birthing nurse said happily as they weighed him from across the room.  
“Can I hold him now?” Leah asked, desperate to hold him again.

“Of course.” One of the nurses – not much older than her, said happily as she brought the little, blue bundle over to her again. She placed her gently in Leah’s arms once more, and Leah couldn’t find it in herself to take her eyes off the small infant.

It only vaguely occurred to her that this was the baby that she had been so scared of initially and now, he felt like the rightest thing in the entire universe. He had a full head of dark brown hair and was so tiny and beautiful. The doctors had put ointment over his eyes, keeping them closed for now, and she couldn’t wait to stare into his little face forever. He had a little bracelet on, with Leah’s name on it, identifying him as her son. 

A son. It was crazy. Knowing you were pregnant, finding out the gender… none of it was comparable to meeting your own tiny human in the flesh. 

The OBGYN was still working on compressing her stomach. After a few minutes, the doctor left and the nurses cleaned her up, telling her she didn’t need any stitches – she had a flawless labor. It was a relief, but it was hard to really focus on anything but the small child in her arms. They kept her IV in and blood pressure cuff on but removed her catheters and then, the nurse helped her legs out of the stirrups and covered her with a heavy blanket as she started to shiver.

“That’s normal,” the nurse confirmed, coming up beside Sue. She vaguely recognized her as Jillian – one of her mom’s co-workers, and she hugged Sue tightly. “Congrats, grandma.”

Sue wiped her cheeks dry, clearly amazed by the small human in Leah’s arms, and Jillian smiled happily, handing her some tissues. “How are you feeling, Leah?”

Leah looked up to Jillian and smiled. “Uncomfortable, but none of that compares to him.”

She smiled, “He’s beautiful. You did wonderful. Your bleeding is controlled and you’re going to be transferred into another room for a couple of hours before you’re allowed visitors, okay?”

Leah nodded, and then she was moving, out of the room, and down the hall, into a small, quiet, private room – the perks of Sue working there.

Jillian had to go, and Sue told Jillian she would assist Leah with breastfeeding when Leah confirmed she wanted to try it, so that they could have some time alone. Then, they were left to just the three of them for a short period of time.

“Do you want to hold him?” Leah asked Jacob softly, not wanting to give up the small infant, but also seeing Jacob’s entranced eyes.

“He’s so small…”

“I’ll bring him over,” Sue said softly, gently taking the baby from Leah, holding him for a moment, amazed, before transferring him into Jacob’s arms gently, instructing him how to hold the infant. The baby looked so small against Jacob’s broad chest, and a love that Leah never knew existed welled in her chest as she watched him with their baby.

“This is surreal,” Jacob said again, barely able to breath. Suddenly, he saw one of his eyes flutter open, the gel wearing off, and Jacob hadn’t experienced anything like it before in his life. His son. He was a dad.

“You should feed him now,” Sue said softly after Jacob held him for a little while. “The sooner the better - and the more skin to skin contact the better.”

Jacob handed the baby back to Leah and Sue helped her lower her gown and instructed her on how to get him to latch. Luckily, he was awake and somewhat alert and gravitated toward her easily. Jacob watched in amazement and even Sue was surprised at how easily he latched, and Leah had no issues whatsoever in feeding him the colostrum until her milk came in fully.

“Do you have a name?” Sue asked as she took him to burp him and let Leah and Jacob have a minute together.

Leah looked to Jacob, and he kissed her forehead before meeting Sue’s eyes. “Benjamin Harry Black – Ben for short.”

The middle name, after Harry, caused tears in both her and Leah’s eyes and moments later, Sue handed Ben back to Leah. “I love it. I’ll give you both some time alone before sending the others in, okay? I think the whole pack is out there now.”

Sue left and went to tell everyone that mom and baby were fine, and Leah moved over to allow Jacob onto the bed. She snuggled into him easily, head resting on his chest as she held Benjamin close to her chest, his soft, shallow breaths filling the room as he dozed off, happy and fed. She was sure parenting would get much more difficult, but right now, this was the epitome of perfection. 

“He’s perfect,” Jacob finally breathed.

“Absolutely perfect,” she agreed, looking up to Jacob. He kissed her gently, their lips moving slowly against one another’s. “I can’t believe he’s ours.”

“I’ve never been happier,” Jacob said softly. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t here during the entire labor. I have no idea where my phone went.”

“It’s okay,” she said. “You’re here now. And you got here just in time.” They stayed like that for what felt like an eternity. “You know,” Leah said softly, grasping Jacob’s attention away from the baby. “This is exactly how I pictured this day.”

Jacob smirked, “Me coming in late?”

“No,” she mused. “Just… how perfect it was, no matter how imperfect. I love you, and I’m so glad that we’re in this together.”

Jacob tilted her head up so that he could easily press their lips together and smiled. “I couldn’t imagine this day with anyone else,” he said honestly, cupping her cheek. “I love you so much, Leah Clearwater.”

They were interrupted by a knock on the door, and Sue entered. “Up for a couple of visitors?”

The nurse had come by to check her vitals, provide her with some post-partum instructions and products, and do up the birth certificate and necessary paperwork, but for the majority of the past two hours, they had been alone, bonding. She was regretful to lose that but knew they had so many people who loved them who wanted to meet Ben. “Of course,” Leah said gently.

Sue pushed open the door and Rachel and Seth came in, followed by Sue wheeling Billy in. Rachel’s eyes were full of tears the moment she saw her best friend and brother and went over, hugging her younger brother tightly before the tears fell, just as Seth went over to Leah and felt his own tears coming.

“Meet Benjamin Harry Black, your nephew.” Leah wiped the tears off her cheeks, too, and smiled seeing Jacob shed a couple more of his own. 

“You’re giving him our last name?” Rachel asked happily.

Leah nodded, “He’s Jacob’s son, so he should have his name.”

“And Leah will be Leah Black soon enough,” Jacob said happily. “And since you’re a Lahote now, we ‘gotta replenish the Black name.”

“I can’t believe that was in your stomach,” Seth said, not knowing what to say, causing them all to laugh. 

Sue put a hand on Seth’s shoulder and gently pulled him back so that Billy could wheel up close. He smiled proudly at Leah and she handed the baby to Sue to place in Billy’s arms. “And your grandpa Black,” Sue said happily, causing tears to streak down Billy’s face, too. 

“I can’t believe it,” Billy said softly. “He’s beautiful.”

“How are you feeling?” Rachel asked, sniffing more tears back. She seemed overwhelmed with emotion. 

“Okay,” Leah said softly. “Nothing unusual. Mostly just so in love.”

“We’ve always been family,” Billy said suddenly, filling the room with a silence, but so much comfort. “But now this little guy cements it – the merging of two very powerful bloodlines.”

Exactly what Old Quil had said – the spirit in her blood. It was probably the spirit inside of her – in Ben’s blood. He had promised no one would forget the Alpha and Beta union and Benjamin was proof of that.

Ben woke up in Billy’s arms and Jacob sat on the bed with Leah again, wrapping his arms around her as Rachel took the armchair, Seth on the arm of it. Sue stood behind Billy, looking down in wonder at the small child, barely believing he was her grandson. 

“Harry would be so proud,” Billy said finally, looking up to Leah.

As normal, the statement caused a dampness to fill her eyes and she nodded, afraid if she went to speak, her voice would be lost. 

“And I’m proud. Of you both. I know this was… unorthodox, but you’ve handled yourselves so well. I’m glad to see Renesmee here, too – it really solidifies your connection and proves that you’re doing this together no matter what and moving on from the past.”

“Renesmee is here?” Leah asked suddenly, brow furrowed.

Jacob loosened his grip on her and nodded deftly. “And Bella and Edward. You kind of scared the crap out of me at the Cullen’s, and I didn’t really think before I left. Ness asked if she could come, and I said whatever I could to get out of there and on the road back.”

She nodded, taking the words in silently, not wanting to cause a scene. All she really wanted to do in that moment was hold her son again, and Billy noticed the longing in her eyes before asking Sue to take Ben back to his mother. There was an unspoken tension in the room, but Leah smiled as Ben opened his eyes. He started to cry, but she gently bounced him in her arms, trying to comfort him.

“I can ask them to leave,” Billy suggested, not wanting to put Leah through any further stress today.

“It’s fine, but I don’t want them around Ben right now.” The room was quiet, and she sighed, looking up. “I didn’t say forever, okay? But I literally just got him, and I want to keep him for myself for a while longer.”

“I know, baby,” Sue said softly, kissing her daughter’s hair. “That’s normal. We can wait to send the others in-“

“Can you send Sam in?”

Her mom nodded and Rachel took her mind off Renesmee by asking her every question she could think of about her labour. It was effective, because Jacob needed some of the details, too, considering he wasn’t there, and they all fell into familiar and easy conversation.

Sam came in a moment later and Leah smiled. “Hey,” she said easily.

“Thanks again, Sam,” Jacob greeted.

“My pleasure. How are you both?” Billy wheeled away from the bed and Sam came over, peering down at the small face, smiling. 

“We’re good,” Leah said, exchanging a quick glance with Jacob. “Would you like to meet your godson?”

“Godson?” Sam’s brow furrowed.

“If you want,” Jacob added, smiling at Sam’s confusion.

“Absolutely,” he said, overcome with gratitude as Leah put him into his arms.

“What’s his name?”

“Benjamin Harry Black,” Jacob announced proudly. 

“I’ll ask Emily next time I see her,” Leah said quietly.

Ben was still a little fussy, so Sam walked the room with him as a nurse stuck her head in. “What did I say about visitors?” She asked with a joking tone to her voice.

“Three at a time, but,” Leah grinned. “He’s brand new, so you can make an exception, right?”

“For Sue’s daughter? Absolutely, but,” she said firmly. “You need rest. You may be high on cloud nine and adrenaline right now, but your body’s been through an ordeal. Another twenty minutes and then you need some sleep, okay? Mom and dad only.” Leah nodded, accepting her terms as she checked her vitals again. “How are you feeling?”

“A little sorer now that I can start to feel my legs again,” she admitted.

The nurse nodded, her vitals coming back fine. “I’ll get you some more ice and medicated pads, and a minor painkiller. Once you get some sleep, we can get you up walking.”

Leah nodded her thanks before the nurse slipped out, and Billy took that as his cue to leave. “Alright, you get some rest. We’ll be home and if you’re still in tomorrow we’ll come back. If you’re home by then, we can drop over.” He leaned up to kiss Leah’s cheek before Rachel hugged her and Jacob and left with Billy – promising to ask more questions later. Sam handed Ben back to Leah and kissed her hair, promising to fill Emily in before he, too, left. Seth stayed around and Leah gestured for him to sit on her other side on the bed. He did and looked down at the little baby in her arms and smiled. He reached out and gently touched his hand, and Ben wrapped his little fingers around Seth’s bigger one.

“He likes you,” Leah said softly, watching Seth’s amazed expression.

“He’s only a baby,” Seth said teasingly.

“He can sense energy, though,” Leah pointed out. 

“Was it as terrible as the movies?” He asked, only half-jokingly.

“Worse,” she laughed. 

Sue stuck her head in. “Seth? Let’s let Leah rest. The nurses said they’ll come put the baby in the baby ward for the night so you can get some uninterrupted sleep.”

“No, I want him here,” she pouted.

“You need to rest, baby. Trust me, take the break now while you can.”

“We can keep him here. I got it,” Jacob promised.

“Well if you get overwhelmed, need help, or sleep, page the nurse okay? I’m going to go home with Seth and get some sleep. What do you want me to do with everyone else?”

“Everyone else?”

“I told you, the entire pack is here.”

Leah smiled and looked at the clock. “Technically I have ten minutes left before I have to sleep…”

Sue laughed, “I’ll send them in, but you have to be quiet, okay?”

“Is Renesmee still here?” Leah asked, causing Jacob to shift nervously. Sue nodded, and Leah sighed. “Can you send her in first? With Edward and Bella. Then they can get going home.”

Sue was a little apprehensive but nodded. “Of course.” 

When Seth and Sue left, Jacob turned to her. “It was stupid, I’m sorry-“

“Let’s get this over with,” she said. “But they’re not holding him. He smells perfect – like a little baby, and he’s not going to smell like a leech.”

Jacob couldn’t help but to chuckle, and he nodded. “Whatever you say, Lee.”

A moment later, the door opened, and the three vampires entered.

“Leah,” Bella said sweetly. “Congratulations.”

“Thank you,” she said dully, turning her attention to Renesmee as Edward spoke his thanks, too.

She was thinking Jacob would take over, but when she looked, he was staring at Renesmee intently, neither breaking the others gaze and she frowned, looking back down to Ben so her confliction wouldn’t show.

“It’s changed,” Jacob said finally, catching her attention.

Renesmee nodded sadly. “Aunt Alice called. She said your future changed again.”

That made a cold chill go down Jacob’s spine. “Again?”

Edward nodded, “As soon as Leah got pregnant… it changed, but we knew the baby was here when Alice called and told us it changed again… The bond you and Leah have, and the baby – it has seemed to have broken the imprint entirely.”

“I feel it,” Jacob said, getting off the bed to go over and touch Renesmee’s hand, as if he was really only seeing her for the first time. “It’s gone.”

She nodded, “I still want you safe, and I love you… like a brother, but there are no romantic feelings left.”

Leah watched, clearly confused, her heart thumping loudly in her chest and Jacob dropped Renesmee’s hand. 

Jacob dropped her gaze and looked back to Leah, wanting today to be about her. He went back to her side, sitting on the side of the bed by her again, pulling her close. He could deal with whatever this was after.

“If it’s for reproduction… the imprint, I guess it makes sense,” Leah said softly, looking between Renesmee and Jacob, then back down at her and Jacob’s son. 

“And we make the pack stronger,” Jacob said firmly as she looked up to him. He smiled down at her, and for once, she felt as though there was no overcast in his heart – it belonged to her, fully and unconditionally. Ben’s birth may have changed things, for good, for ever, in her favor. It felt like a pretty lame win, but honestly, she would take absolutely anything that pushed Jacob toward her forever. She felt her eyes well with tears, and as if on cue, Ben started to fuss again before breaking out into full-blown cries. Leah bounced him gently, but it wasn’t working.

“Let me have him,” Jacob said, taking him carefully before getting up and walking the room with him. The motion calmed him down, and he brought him over to the Cullen’s.

“Benjamin Harry Black,” he introduced him again, Renesmee grinning.

“He’s so cute,” she giggled.

“Well, with parents like us,” Jacob looked back to Leah smirking. “Who would have thought any differently?”

Leah couldn’t help but to laugh, but she yawned quickly. “I don’t want to cut this short… but, can you guys give us some privacy?”

“Of course, we’re glad everything is okay.” Edward said finally, reading her mind – she was tired, and the other guys were waiting to come in – but she was so happy. “Carlisle and the others send their blessings.”

Jacob said goodbye to Renesmee platonically and went back to Leah before the mass of guys came in. “I told you, I chose you. Always,” his finger ran over her engagement ring. 

“I love you,” she said softly. “So much.”

He leaned down, kissing her feverishly, conveying all his emotions in that one kiss. Benjamin fussed at the abrupt stop, but Jacob gently bounced him again and it kept him calm for now. The guys came in then, and the room was full. Sam had already left, with Billy, Sue and Seth, but the rest of the guys – save for the younger wolves, were all there and Rachel was waiting in the waiting room for Paul to see the baby in before leaving.

“Okay, come on, no more kissing, you seen where that got you the first time,” Paul teased. “Baby #2 coming soon I guess?”

Jared snorted, “You guys are going to have a million of them, aren’t you? By the way you can’t keep your hands off each other, and well, the way you both look right now.”

“Plus in the bible, Jacob and Leah had like, thirteen kids – you ‘gonna try to rival them?”

“Jacob also had like four wives,” Leah joked. 

“One is enough,” Jacob chuckled, looking at her. “Three more of you? No way, woman.”

“I did say wives,” Embry chuckled. “Not fiancées. Any date set yet?”

Leah rolled her eyes but felt a longing in his words. There was no doubt in her mind that she wanted to be with Jacob forever, but they had enough on their plates right now.

“No date yet,” Jacob joked easily, though his use of ‘yet’ definitely caught Leah’s attention and she had a feeling he was going to try to get her on board with a wedding sooner rather than later. 

Jacob showed Ben off to the guys. Embry and Quil were amazed, Jared was actually paternal and held him, and Paul hesitated as he looked at the small face, feeling nervousness rise up in him as he shook his head when Jared offered him a chance to hold him. Embry and Quil declined too, but they were just scared of how tiny he was. 

“What’s wrong with you, wolf got your tongue?”

“No, no, nothing,” Paul brushed him off. Today was about Leah and Jacob – and Benjamin, their newest wolf-recruit. 

Jacob gave him a curious look but dropped it when Leah yawned again.

“Alright, mom needs rest now,” Jacob announced. “Hopefully we’ll be home tomorrow and you can visit then.”

Jared went over and gently placed Ben in Leah’s arms, “Good job, Clearwater. You are even more bad-ass now.”

Leah smiled at Jared’s sincere words and thanked him, curling Ben back, close to her chest happily. She felt whole having the little one near her and although she loved watching everyone fussing over him, she needed the quality time to bond – he was still so new. And she was now feeling the adrenaline wear off – and the pain meds, and she was sore and tired.

Jacob walked the guys out, but Paul seemed bothered. The guys were getting ready to leave, but Jacob asked if he could grab Paul for a second first, especially when he saw him go right to Rachel’s side and hug her tightly. He hadn’t realized Rachel hung back.

“What’s up?” Jacob asked, following Paul out as he left to pull the car around. “Is everything okay?”

Paul nodded deftly, but still looked like he had seen a ghost. “Everything’s fine, we’re all pulling our weight in the pack until you come back-“

“Not with the pack, with you.”

“Yeah, it’s fine, seriously, don’t worry about me, go spend time with your family.”

Family. The word resonated deeply with Jacob, and he couldn’t help but to smile. “Alright, fine, but let me know if there’s anything you need, okay?”

“You too, dad,” Paul grinned. “Go enjoy Ben and let Leah rest.”

Jacob was planning to do just that and went back inside with his wife-to-be and new baby. “Today was eventful,” he said, sitting in the armchair by the bed as Leah nursed Ben again.

“Considering you missed half of it,” she mused.

“I’m never living that down,” he sighed. “I’m glad Sam was here. Was it weird?”

“Nah, kind of… familiar. He kept me calm.”

“You had a quick labor,” he pointed out. “Carlisle told me some women are in labor for like, two days.”

She shrugged, “And some women give birth on the way to the hospital, too, so I guess I was perfectly in the middle.”

“I don’t think I could love you anymore right now,” he said suddenly as she carefully burped Ben. 

Leah looked over to him and smiled. “Now? When I look like crap and everything below my waist hurts?”

Jacob chuckled and got up to kiss her cheek. “You’re beautiful, now and always. Seeing you bring Ben into the world today was the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen in my life. I knew you were strong, but that… it was unreal.”

Jacob took Benjamin and sat back in the chair, staring at his little face, giving Leah some time to lay back and rest. The euphoria running through her made the days events on her body seem insignificant and although she wanted to stay up and see Ben all night, her eyes were slowly fluttering closed. 

Jacob was glad as she got some rest and he managed to take care of Ben for the rest of the night – with the help of some kind nurses, of course. He only woke Leah once for another feeding as per the nurse’s instructions, and then laid him in his little newborn cubicle in their room while he, too, got a couple hours of sleep. When he woke, the early morning sun peering through the half-opened blinds, he saw Leah feeding Ben again.

“How much do these things eat?” He asked jokingly.

“Good morning to you, too,” she smirked. 

“You look good.”

“I’ve got an adult diaper on and so much numbing cream and ice packs that I’m not sure I can move on my own, but thanks for trying.” She did feel a lot better, though.

Jacob laughed, and shifted, stretching in the chair. It was way too small for him, and his neck was cramped, but none of that mattered. He got up to sit by Leah on the bed. She had a tray of half-eaten food in front of her and urged him to eat the rest – her appetite was still a little off. 

Not long after, the discharge nurse came in and smiled. “Leah Clearwater?”

“Yes?”

“You’re all set to go home.”

The nurse gave Ben to Jacob before helping Leah up, out of bed and to the bathroom. She helped her change into the clean sweatpants she brought and her tank top and sweater. She also told her that everything looked extraordinarily perfect and when Leah promised she was okay, the nurse left her alone to run a brush through her hair and freshen up. Something about the nurse’s surprise about her healing didn’t sit well with her, though, and when she moved, she realized she felt significantly better – not even any discomfort. It must have been the numbing cream. 

She emerged from the bathroom a few minutes later and watched Jacob strap Ben into his car seat with the help of her mom.

“Mom!”

“Hey, how are you feeling?”

“Fine,” she hugged her tightly. “Thank you for everything yesterday.”

“That’s what moms are for,” she said lovingly. “Let’s get you three home.”

Sue grabbed her things and pushed Leah out in a wheelchair, Jacob behind with the car seat. It was such a weird feeling – she had dreamed of this beautiful day for so long and now, she was going home, with her beautiful son and her husband-to-be. It may not have been the way she thought today would have went when she was a teenager, but now, she knew it was the perfect way. Things had a way of working out.

Leah and Jacob both sat in the back seat of Sue’s SUV on the way home, enthralled by the small infant and when they got home, Leah was so glad to be able to hop in the shower. When she did, though, she noticed her stomach had significantly shrunk – almost back to her pre-pregnancy size. Based on the nurse’s post-care instructions, she was sure that was… well, not expected. When she undressed further in the bathroom, she noticed she felt perfect.

Absolutely perfect.

Studying her body, she finally realized what happened: her wolf-healing had kicked in. Though she wasn’t completely back to normal, she could imagine in hours, she would be, and she was so confused since her wolf stayed hidden for the past 5 months to stop her phasing and protect the baby.

Going downstairs after she was cleaned, her mom had cooked a huge brunch and she noticed Rachel holding Ben on the couch, Seth beside her, and Jacob talking to Billy at the kitchen table. 

Her mom and Charlie were cooking in the kitchen and Leah went over to her friend as Ben started to fuss. “Hate to interrupt, but it’s feeding time.”

Rachel smiled and handed Ben back as Leah grabbed a thin cloth and covered herself before getting him to latch. He drank happily, no problems, as before. 

When her mom came out, and Jacob and Billy migrated over, Leah looked up. “My healing is back,” she said as her mom took in her rather deflated stomach in her tight tank top. “I’m… practically back to normal.”

“The wolf genes don’t want you to be unarmed,” Billy guessed. 

“Easiest post-op ever,” Leah mused.

“Don’t get too cocky,” Sue grinned. “You’ve got to get used to having an infant around all the time, remember? No nurse’s here.”

“Besides you,” Leah teased.

“I told you, I’ll stay as long as you want me to, but I do have to go back to work, so you’re going to be on your own.”

“We’ll figure it out,” Jacob said supportively. “And, I just told my dad about the imprint.”

Leah raised a brow, “Are you sure it’s…. gone?”

“As soon as I saw Ben, and then Renesmee, I felt it,” he promised. “It’s gone. I still want her safe, of course, as her friend, but there’s no… other force driving me to her.”

“Maybe the imprint can be for more than one thing,” Billy suggested. “You imprinted on Renesmee because at the time, she did make you a better wolf – you took control of your own pack, protected her, and saved her life, and also formed an allegiance between you and Sam’s packs with the Cullen’s, which is a strong ally to have, despite how unorthodox. But, if it comes down to fertility, too, your wolf knows you’ve made your choice, and knows this little guy will be really strong, and knows Leah makes you a better man, so the wolf backed down. I don’t know, obviously, but it makes sense.”

They didn’t have much longer to ponder, though because Sue served a huge brunch and Leah ate as though she had been starving for days. When everyone was cleaning up, the front door opened and Paul, Jared, Sam, and Emily came in with baby Grace.

They all gathered in the living room and Leah held Ben, a little tired of passing him around at this point and wanting to bond with him some more. 

Emily sat next to her with Grace and smiled adoringly.

“It’s surreal isn’t it?” she asked her friend, surreal really being the only word to cover everything over the past eight months.

“Definitely. The last day has been insane.”

“Sam said you wanted to talk to me?”

Leah looked up to Emily’s face as everyone chatted and she nodded. “I was going to ask you if you’d like to be Benjamin’s godmother?”

“Leah!” Emily cried happily, wanting to hug her, but both of their arms full. “Of course, thank you!”

Both girls eyes filled with tears and they laughed. “It’s hilarious how this turned out, huh?”

“Tell me about it. I always dreamed of us having kids together and then… well, everything was so messed up and now?”

“Now it’s perfect.”

Leah noticed Rachel had excused herself from the room, though, and Paul had left as well. She shared some more small talk with Emily as they held their babies and before breakfast was ready, Leah went out back to get a moment alone – Jacob had Ben, and saw Rachel wiping her cheeks dry, Paul in front of her, hands resting on her shoulders.

“Sorry,” Leah said as the door shut. “I didn’t know you were out here – are you okay?”

Rachel gulped and nodded, forcing a small smile as she finished wiping the tears away. Paul looked equally as torn, but his eyes were dry. “I’m fine,” she said strongly. “It’s just been an emotional day. I’m so happy for you.”

Leah gave her a small smile, “Are you sure you’re fine…?” She didn’t know why today would have affected Rachel so much. She seemed kind of weird at the hospital, too, but she had obviously been overjoyed for her brother and friend. Was she mad that she wasn’t chosen as the godmother? Had she unintentionally hurt her best friend’s feelings? She thought auntie was a title worthy of enough love shared between the girls, but maybe she should have reconsidered.

“You should talk,” Paul said, kissing her hair. “I’ll be inside, okay?” 

Rachel nodded, and Paul left the girls. Rachel sat on the bench on the back porch and took a breath when Leah sat beside her. “What’s wrong?”

Rachel felt more tears come and she wiped a few rogue ones away. “I don’t want to ruin your day – seriously.”

“You’re not,” Leah took Rachel’s hand. “I don’t like seeing you upset.” Rachel was one of those always happy people – nothing really bothered her, and she was always a beacon of optimism. Seeing her cry for anything other than pure joy didn’t sit right with Leah. “Talk to me, Rach.”

Rachel started crying again, burying her face in her hands and Leah pulled her friend close, her arm around her. “I’m sorry,” she said finally as her body stopped shaking. “Seriously… It’s just been a rough day, let’s not do this right now. I just need a minute.”

Leah hesitated as Rachel pulled away and stood up, her back to Leah as she wiped her cheeks again. Jacob stuck his head out, then, hearing Rachel cry from inside the house with his wolf-hearing. Paul followed him out onto the balcony and sighed, going over and pulling Rachel into his arms as she buried her face against her husband’s chest. Leah and Jacob exchanged an awkward glance and Rachel apologized again a few moments later when she pulled away from Paul.

“What’s wrong?” Jacob asked strongly as Rachel leaned against the railing, facing them, eyes red and puffy. 

Paul looked at his wife, who just nodded and looked down to her feet, and he sighed, “Rachel found out she was pregnant after the wedding,” he said awkwardly, but before any congratulations could be said, he pushed on. “But as soon as she hit six weeks, she lost the baby. The doctor said it’s not uncommon to have a miscarriage that early on, but it’s…” he looked to his wife and put his arm around her. “It’s been rough.”

Leah wasn’t sure what to say. She knew they had been trying, but she hadn’t known about the pregnancy or miscarriage and she felt her heart break for her friend – her future sister-in-law. She also felt guilty for not being there for her during it – not that she had known, but still. “I didn’t want to tell you,” Rachel said softly, her voice breaking. “I… I feel like such a failure.”

“What did we talk about?” Paul said strongly. “This was entirely out of your control, Rach. The fetus… the baby wasn’t strong enough. The pregnancy wasn’t viable. It had nothing to do with you.”

Rachel nodded, but sighed and turned to look out over the balcony, her back to them again. “I just feel so ashamed. I can’t shake it. I’m so happy for you both, honestly – and Emily, and Rebecca. I just… It’s hard.” Rebecca had her baby before Emily.

Jacob went over, Paul stepping aside, and he hugged his sister tightly as she buried her face in his shoulder, no more tears left. He rubbed his hands up and down her back and Leah got up and took Paul’s hand, squeezing it. He gave her a small smile, and Jacob held his sister tightly. “I’m so sorry, Rach.”

He knew what finding out your girlfriend was pregnant was like and he wouldn’t wish the loss on anyone, let alone his sister. “It’s fine, I’m sorry to bring this up today, I just have been having a difficult time with it and seeing Ben… he’s amazing, I just wish I could have given him a little cousin to play with.”

“You will, when the times right,” Jacob said awkwardly, not really knowing how to approach this but feeling his heart hurt for his sister.

“We’re here whenever you want or need to talk,” Leah said as Rachel rested her head on Jacob’s shoulder. “Anytime, Rach. Seriously.”

Rachel forced a small smile, “Thanks, Lee. Go inside – be with Benjamin. I’ll be back inside in a few minutes.”

Leah hesitated, but Jacob nodded, and Leah and Paul went inside, Jacob wanting some time with his sister. Eventually, Rachel did come back in, forcing a smile, trying to live in the now and Leah let Rachel hog Benjamin the rest of the day between feedings and diaper changes. By the time dinner rolled around, she was back in good spirits and Leah was so glad.

As the house emptied later that night, Leah and Jacob were glad to be more or less alone with Ben – save for her mom, Charlie, and Seth. They all sat in the living room and watched a movie together before Leah yawned and Sue shooed her off to bed. Jacob followed her upstairs with Ben, placed their sleeping baby in his bassinet and then crawled into bed beside Leah – who kissed him passionately.

“What’s that for?”

“For being the hottest dad ever,” she smirked, rolling him over so she was on top of him.

“Careful, Clearwater, you just had a baby.”

She smirked, “My stomach is practically flat as a board – and I’m all healed up.”

Jacob chuckled, “Still you need rest.”

“I didn’t think you can deny me anything considering I just had your baby.”

He hesitated, “Are you sure…?”

“Positive.”

Jacob kissed her passionately, silencing her, and they were very quiet as not to wake Ben or alert anyone downstairs of their discretions – after all, it had been months since Leah had been feeling herself and she wanted to feel like a woman again – desired and sexy without a huge belly. Jacob hesitantly took her tank top off over her head and threw it to the floor before groaning.

“What?”

“A nursing bra - another new style bra.”

Leah couldn’t help but to laugh, but reached back and undid it herself, letting it fall off. Although she was right – her wolf healing fixed her all up, her body showed slight changes to her new motherhood, her chest being the main one. 

Jacob met her lips again, not wanting her to feel self conscious at all and pulled her down chest to chest with him, careful not to jostle her around too much. When she started pulling at his shirt, he gently flipped them over and climbed on top of her and helped her discard his shirt before their pants and remaining undergarments followed.

“Tell me if I hurt you, okay?” he whispered against her lips as her legs wrapped around his waist, pulling their bodies closer together.

“I’m fine – really.”

Jacob hesitated, but obliged and eased his way into it, keeping an eye to her facial expression to ensure she was, of course, fine. When only a blissful expression filled her face, he pushed further in before moving their bodies together – forgetting everything but the love that they shared.

When it was over, Leah rested her head on his chest, “That was…”

“Great?”

“Vanilla,” she teased.

He looked down to her and laughed, “Vanilla is good considering we have a two day old baby in the room.”

“I guess fatherhood’s made you soft,” she said casually.

Jacob looked at her, an evil glint in his eye. “Once you’re feeling 100%, I’ll show you-“

But he was cut short, because just then, Benjamin woke up and started to cry.

“I guess this is parenthood.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”


	24. Epilogue: New Year, New Last Name

Exactly two years before, she was drunk off tequila, plagued by unpleasant thoughts about how the man she loved was marrying her best friend, and had a rather hopeless outlook on her future.

Exactly two years before, he was sulking over his imperfect imprint, jealous of all the other guys as they kissed their girlfriends at midnight, and trying to negotiate a pack trade-off with Sam.

Now? She was standing there, trying to focus on not falling, in her kitchen with the doors that led to the backyard closed in front of her, Seth on her arm and Jacob waiting at the end of the aisle to make her Mrs. Black on the other side of the door.

”Are you ready?” Seth asked softly as she heard music playing - a soft, beautiful piano medley. 

She nodded but pulled back and hugged Seth tightly. He embraced her before they pulled back and looped arms again. Seth reached out to open the doors a moment later and everyone stood up.

The backyard wasn’t huge - but it was big enough for everyone they loved to gather with white fold up chairs accompanied with a navy blue bow lining a makeshift, white aisle. Seth led her down the small porch, down the steps, and to the end of the aisle and Jacob’s face lit up like a thousand suns as she walked down. There wasn’t a dry eye in the backyard - including theirs. Her dad was here with her, she felt it, and read it in the letter her mom had given her earlier that morning before she had started her make-up. It had been heartwarming and heartbreaking all at the same time, but she knew her dad would be proud of her and he was looking down on them today in the form of the late afternoon sun shining in the sky and an uncharacteristically warm December 31st.

As promised, Claire – now five, was the flower girl and she sprawled petals down the white aisle before Leah came down and then stood proudly beside Rachel on Leah’s side of the aisle. When Leah made it to the end of the aisle, she hugged her brother tightly and he wiped a tear off her cheek and shook Jacob’s hand before taking his place next to Jacob and Leah hugged her mom who was sat in the front row. Leah took Jacob’s hand and smiled, seeing their little Benjamin sitting on the ground next to Seth. He was the ring bearer, but Seth kept the rings for safe keeping considering Ben was too busy playing in the dirt off to the side of the alter. She couldn’t help but to giggle and nudge Jacob who looked over his shoulder despite the beautiful bride before him. Everyone laughed, looking over to where they had, and the officiant chuckled as Jacob looked at her again, his eyes wide with adoration and love as their almost a year and a half year old son enjoyed getting his suit dirty.

He looked her up and down, appreciating her form-fitted gown with little embellishment but her killer body underneath the shiny, satin material. The neckline was low enough to be appropriate for a wedding, but seductive enough to show off what a beautiful body she had, and the rhinestones just under the bust gave the dress a bridal feel - her train flowing behind her that Rachel had fixed and veil hanging from her long, dark locks. Likewise, Jacob looked amazing in a tailored, navy suit – strong and sexy, as always.

Only Rachel and Seth stood - and Benjamin and Claire, since they wanted a small and intimate wedding but the entire pack and their close family and friends were all in attendance.

“We join here today to witness the union between Jacob Ephraim Black and Leah Elizabeth Clearwater.”

The words couldn’t be any sweeter. The officiant went through traditional ceremonial tasks and finally, he got to the vows.

“I, Leah Clearwater,” Leah said, clearing her throat. “Take you, Jacob Black, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, from this day forth, to love unconditionally and in the face of any adversity we may encounter. I promise to be the best mom I can be to our son, vow to always stand by you, and put you and our family above everything else.”

“I, Jacob Black, take you, Leah Clearwater, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, from this day forth, to love more every day, to protect, to provide for our family, and always kiss you goodnight. I promise to be a man your dad would respect, and be accountable for your happiness.”

Both of their eyes were damp, but with all the sniffles she heard around the backyard, she assumed dry eyes were the minority today.

“Leah, do you take Jacob Black as your lawfully wedded husband?”

“I do.”

“Jacob, do you take Leah Clearwater as your lawfully wedded wife?”

“I do.”

“Well by the power invested in me and the state of Washington, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss your bride.”

Jacob didn’t waste any time scooping Leah into his arms and picking her up as his lips touched hers in a passionate kiss – probably too much so for an audience, and everyone erupted in claps, whistles, and cheers.

Leah smiled against his lips, kissing him again as he pulled back before they turned to everyone.

“I now give you, for the first time as man and wife, Jacob and Leah Black.”

They went down the aisle, smiling like fools as everyone threw rice on them and once they hit the end of the yard, Jacob kissed her again before everyone came over to wish them happiness. Pictures were simple and held in the backyard and Leah and Jacob made sure everyone of importance was in them – and had snuck in a few next to their favorite tree. Leah leaned her back against it – careful not to get sap on her dress (or scratch her back) and Jacob pressed against her, his arm over her head as the photographer snapped pictures of them looking into each other’s eyes and kissing. He had even managed to grip her thigh and pull it up to his hip thanks to the slit up the side of her dress. The pictures – which the photographer briefly showed them, were pretty hot and definitely not parent-appropriate for the photo album but they emanated how in love they were – and insanely sexually compatible. And their tree needed some recognition, right? If only the photographer knew the real story behind their favorite Sitka tree. The rest of the photos were tamer considering they had other people to involve. Benjamin behaved perfectly through-out the whole thing with the promise of a pudding cup once the pictures were over. Despite his dirty suit, the pictures turned out amazing and the day was overflowing with love.

Finally, once food was served and the backyard was transformed with tables and little white hanging lights – thanks to Rachel and Rebecca, Leah and Jacob sat up front with Benjamin. Leah fed him and they both laughed as they saw the state his suit was in from dirt, food, and chocolate stains from the pudding cup earlier. But he was happy and that’s what mattered. All in all, they got lucky – he was a very happy and easy baby. Leah helped him shrug his jacket off and he wasted no time in getting food all over his white shirt. Luckily, he had more clothes inside.

When the meal was over, Jacob and Leah took to the dance floor to ‘Make You Feel My Love’. She curled close to him as he spun her around the dance floor, stealing kisses.

“I never thought two years ago today we’d be getting married today.”

“Me either,” Jacob smirked. “Or have a son.”

“I guess life just has a way of working things out,” she said coyly.

“I guess so,” he murmured before kissing her again.

The music soon faded and Jacob took the dance floor with Rachel to ‘I Hope You Dance’ and she watched as Rachel wiped Jacob’s face dry as a few tears spilled over at the absence of their mother. 

“Mom would be so proud of you,” Rachel whispered as he pulled her into a hug on the dance floor before Rebecca cut in to finish the song with her little brother. Her little girl, Kailey, was playing with Grace and Benjamin off to the side with Emily and Sam and Leah smiled thankfully for their help. It was nice to be so close to them both again and watch their kids grow up together, like her and Emily always dreamed before the supernatural threw their lives into the blender.

When the song ended, Seth looked to Leah and smiled, extending his hand to her. He had picked the song, so she didn’t know what it was, but as a familiar tune started to play – I Loved Her First by Heartland, Leah teared up immediately.

“Dad would have loved this song,” Seth murmured as he pulled her close as tears spilled down Leah’s cheeks.

“You’re the best, you know that?”

Seth spun her around and Leah couldn’t hold back the tears. As the song hit the midpoint, Sue, Billy, Jacob, Rebecca and Rachel came out with Benjamin and handed him to Leah, engulfing them into a group hug. Leah laughed and cried and then buried her face into her brother’s chest as her mom rubbed her back. It was the most emotional part of the day – and everyone’s heart ached for Harry and Sarah’s presence. But they had each other – they were a family. 

Sue hugged her daughter as Benjamin cuddled into Leah’s other shoulder, and as the song came to an end, she heard Seth at the mic.

“I want to thank everyone for coming today on behalf of my sister and my new brother-in-law,” he said. “I also want to say that I know today is hard for you both – with the absence of Sarah and Harry, but I know they’re here today with us. I know that, without a doubt, they would both be extremely proud of you. I know I am – you’ve tackled parenthood flawlessly and everyone can see how much you love each other. I’m thankful to gain a brother today – but you’ve been a part of our family forever so it really doesn’t feel any different; but I am giving my sister to you, as our father would have, and I trust you’ll keep her heart safe. I love you both.”

Jacob and Leah hugged Seth and then the dance floor opened for everyone. Renesmee, Edward, and Bella were there along with Rosalie, and Renesmee had even brought Nahuel – who she was now romantically involved with despite Edward’s unease. They had remained a friendly relationship with the Cullen’s since Benjamin’s birth, all parties enthralled that the imprint was now a non-issue. Jeremy was even there with Mikayla and a new girlfriend of his own that Leah had met a few times, now, during play dates. Mikayla was a lot older than Benjamin, obviously, but Jeremy enjoyed the company and she loved playing with Ben. Leah had become a female figure in Mikayla’s life, but she was glad Jeremy was finally getting serious with someone long-term and from what Leah could tell, she was great with Mikayla and infatuated with Jeremy. His sister Jamie had also gotten the all-clear from the doctor’s and was now, thankfully, cancer-free. Her mom and Charlie had even tied the knot since and Billy and Allison had moved in together now that the Black house was empty since Rachel and Paul had gotten their own place. The entire pack was phased out but could still feel the magic in their blood on a night like tonight with the Cullen’s close. They were back to a normal life, but normality was relevant and with vampires around in any capacity, there really was never a true ‘normal’. Kim and Jared were the next upcoming nuptials since their proposal a few months ago and Jacob was doing great with the mechanic business while she went to school. It was nice to see everything finally working out for everyone. Seth and Abigail were going strong and she had practically moved into the house with her, Jacob, and Benjamin and held up with Seth in his room all the time. It was a little weird at first, but it soon became a relief to have an extra set of hands around to help with Benjamin.

As the night went on, and it got closer to midnight, the guys set up fireworks in the backyard to celebrate the impending new year. Leah took Jacob’s hand and pulled him to the side, under the cover and privacy of nearby trees as she held Benjamin on her hip. It was way past his bedtime, but he was still bright-eyed and this was a special night.

“What’s up, Mrs. Black?”

She smiled, “I almost forgot to give you your gift.”

Jacob had flowers sent to Sue’s that morning – along with a beautiful tennis bracelet that currently adorned her wrist. “You didn’t have to get me anything.”

Leah shrugged, “Just open it.”

She handed him a small, rectangular box with a red bow, and he eyed her before taking the top off. He looked down at the boxes contents before he grinned and met his new wife’s gaze. She was a little taken aback at the lack of surprise registering on his face. “I had a feeling.”

“What? How?”

“You haven’t drank all night, not even to the toasts,” he said observantly. 

A smirk turned up the corner of the she-wolf’s lips. “Observing my alcohol intake, huh?”

“Well we were trying this time,” he grinned foolishly before pulling her into an embrace, along with Benjamin. “When did you find out?”

She smiled devilishly, a little disappointed that she had outed herself earlier but glad at Jacob’s obvious excitement. “I took a test last week – I was feeling ‘kinda nauseous, but I wanted to save it to surprise you today.”

“You make me the happiest man on earth,” he kissed her passionately before looking back down to the box - and the very positive pregnancy test inside. “Another baby…”

“Yep – another baby. Probably a girl this time.”

“I didn’t think I could love you anymore, but you keep surprising me.”

“Are you excited?”

“I’m fucking elated.”

“Shh,” she tsked him, gesturing to Benjamin who had laid his head on Leah’s shoulder, finally growing sleepy.

He chuckled, “How will this affect school?”

Leah shrugged, “It shouldn’t. Benjamin is in the daycare on campus and once this little one comes, I can get him or her in there, too, while I finish college. I just won’t be able to take any time off school when the baby comes – but with my wolf healing I should be fine.”

Jacob kissed her again, “My gift seems kind of lame now considering you’re giving me another baby.”

Leah laughed, gently bouncing Benjamin as he started fussing. “Congratulations, baby Black #2 coming soon.” She looked down to Benjamin, kissing his chubby cheek. “You’re going to be a big brother, buddy.” He didn’t understand and merely yawned in response, but Jacob and Leah smiled adoringly at their little guy being a big brother soon. Thankfully, his growing had normalized as soon as he was born and wasn’t super-charged like her pregnancy had been. It must have been just to avoid her being unarmed for as long as possible as a wolf. Benjamin was as normal as any other baby, though.

“Has it been the same time sequencing as your pregnancy on Benjamin?”

She nodded, “Yeah I should only be like three weeks – not even detectable, but I’m seven according to the digital test I took.”

“And you’re sure?”

“I took that one this morning,” she gestured to the one in his hand. “So yeah – pretty sure.”

She heard the fireworks going off and looked up in the sky, through the trees and smiled. “Happy New Year,” she said, grinning like a fool as she pointed up for Benjamin to look, having already put his baby earmuffs on. 

He looked amazed – and so did Jacob, as he watched his wife and son together before looking up at the fireworks. “At least you’re not sick off tequila this year.”

“Nope, just sick because of a baby – again.”

Jacob chuckled and pulled her close. “Who needs birth control when you can have a bunch of these little guys?” He asked, tapping Benjamin’s nose causing him to giggle.

“Everything is perfect.”

“Utterly and completely.”

“And guess what?”

“Hm?”

“Rachel’s almost fourteen weeks.”

“What?”

Leah smirked, “Yep. She told me earlier today when we were getting ready – but you have to act surprised when she tells you.”

“Finally,” he sighed in relief. They had been trying for over two years now and he knew it had been rough. “I guess New Year’s is just a special time for us Black’s.”

“Every day is special with you,” she said sentimentally.

“How about we get Benjamin to bed and hit the hay ourselves? I think we can ditch the party now and go celebrate.”

“What did you have in mind?”

Jacob smirked, lowering his voice as he gestured to Benjamin. “Nothing baby-friendly.”

“I think our bodies are very baby-friendly,’ Leah pointed out as she put her free hand on her belly. They had only ditched the birth control two months ago, after all. “I guess wolves are pretty fertile.”

“Well you may be already pregnant but that doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy the process,” he smirked boyishly standing there in his white button down, jacket and tie long-gone.

“I like the sound of that.”

“After you, Mrs. Black.”

The End


End file.
